September 7, 2026 • 3 mins
Do picnics pass the pub test?
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Gold, hello there.
Speaker 2 (00:01):
It's Jonesy and Amanda driving you home. It's been a
hell of a week. I think we should get down
to the Jonesy and Amanda arms for.
Speaker 1 (00:06):
The pub test.
Speaker 3 (00:07):
Pub test.
Speaker 1 (00:08):
Pass the pub test.
Speaker 4 (00:09):
If something sounds unlikely, then it should fail.
Speaker 3 (00:12):
The pub test.
Speaker 1 (00:13):
Yeah, the pub test. Doesn't pass the sniff test.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
Stop it.
Speaker 5 (00:16):
It's not helpful.
Speaker 3 (00:17):
Picnics.
Speaker 1 (00:17):
Do they pass the pub test?
Speaker 3 (00:19):
I drove past a big parkland yesterday and lots of
families having picnics for Father's Day, which looked lovely, but
it's not for me. I need lumber support. I can't
eat standing up with plastic plates and flies in my mouth.
Call me weird.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
I can't do it.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
If you're the person, I'm going to maybe a little
flip-flop around on this. If you're not the person that's
setting it up, it's pretty cool. I've been invited to
a picnic where it's all there and you just show
up and you're pretty much just drinking in public.
Speaker 3 (00:47):
But you still have to stand up using cutlery in
one hand and maybe one of those wooden spoons that's
going to... Splinter in your mouth.
Speaker 1 (00:58):
I can still sit cross-legged on the ground like I'm
in kindergarten.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
Can you?
Speaker 1 (01:01):
Yeah, no worries. Getting up takes a little bit, but
getting down, no problem.
Speaker 5 (01:05):
Really?
Speaker 1 (01:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:06):
It's not for me. It's just not for me. I
appreciate the romance of it, those elaborate picnic baskets. It
just looks so lovely.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
What about when you see those dudes and they're making
a wood barbecue outside and they're cooking stuff?
Speaker 1 (01:18):
I'd love that. I think, would I? You go to
a sanctioned park and there's the barbecue.
Speaker 5 (01:23):
The wood barbecue.
Speaker 1 (01:23):
But if someone else is doing it, I don't want
to have to think. I don't mind taking over doing
the barbecue.
Speaker 3 (01:27):
If I can sit comfortably in a chair with a
glass of wine in my hand and not have to
do anything, I may stop whinging.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
I remember one picnic slash barbecue I went to, they said,
who wants to light the fire?
Speaker 1 (01:38):
I said, well, that'd be me. So you're pretty much
beer in your hand.
Speaker 3 (01:42):
Flamethrower in the oven.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
Sanctioned to light a fire in a park and everyone's going,
good on you.
Speaker 3 (01:47):
Picnics, do they pass the pub test?
Speaker 4 (01:50):
Look, to be fair, I actually think it's more about
the women's preparation and the men's execution. On the very
rare occasion, because a lot of women also end up
doing both.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
Yes, for sure.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
It's great fun, you know, good energy to spend and
be out in the sun with the family, have fun,
eat good food.
Speaker 5 (02:09):
Picnics are fantastic. It's a great way to go and
get some sunshine on your bones and fantastic way to
catch up with family and friends. I don't know who
came up with the idea. I'm at the stage now.
If I get on the ground, it takes me 10
minutes to get up. What's wrong with the picnic table?
Sit at the table. Not on the ground. That's why
(02:29):
they invented roofs, so you didn't have to sit outside.
You've got to put sun cream on. And then you've
got ants to deal with and magpies. If you're down
the beach, you've got to beat the seagulls away with
a burnt stick.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
You know, can I add, even if you get a
picnic table, you have to go with your legs side-saddling
over it. I can't even do that.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
What about when you have to share the picnic table?
The people you don't know. You get other people that
come along and they want to share the picnic table.
Speaker 2 (02:55):
No.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
I tell you, a picnic is no picnic.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
Righto, UT.
Speaker 4 (02:59):
That's enough.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
They lied to us.
Gold, hello there.
Speaker 2 (00:01):
It's Jonesy and Amanda driving you home. It's been a
hell of a week. I think we should get down
to the Jonesy and Amanda arms for.
Speaker 1 (00:06):
The pub test.
Speaker 3 (00:07):
Pub test.
Speaker 1 (00:08):
Pass the pub test.
Speaker 4 (00:09):
If something sounds unlikely, then it should fail.
Speaker 3 (00:12):
The pub test.
Speaker 1 (00:13):
Yeah, the pub test. Doesn't pass the sniff test.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
Stop it.
Speaker 5 (00:16):
It's not helpful.
Speaker 3 (00:17):
Picnics.
Speaker 1 (00:17):
Do they pass the pub test?
Speaker 3 (00:19):
I drove past a big parkland yesterday and lots of
families having picnics for Father's Day, which looked lovely, but
it's not for me. I need lumber support. I can't
eat standing up with plastic plates and flies in my mouth.
Call me weird.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
I can't do it.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
If you're the person, I'm going to maybe a little
flip-flop around on this. If you're not the person that's
setting it up, it's pretty cool. I've been invited to
a picnic where it's all there and you just show
up and you're pretty much just drinking in public.
Speaker 3 (00:47):
But you still have to stand up using cutlery in
one hand and maybe one of those wooden spoons that's
going to... Splinter in your mouth.
Speaker 1 (00:58):
I can still sit cross-legged on the ground like I'm
in kindergarten.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
Can you?
Speaker 1 (01:01):
Yeah, no worries. Getting up takes a little bit, but
getting down, no problem.
Speaker 5 (01:05):
Really?
Speaker 1 (01:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:06):
It's not for me. It's just not for me. I
appreciate the romance of it, those elaborate picnic baskets. It
just looks so lovely.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
What about when you see those dudes and they're making
a wood barbecue outside and they're cooking stuff?
Speaker 1 (01:18):
I'd love that. I think, would I? You go to
a sanctioned park and there's the barbecue.
Speaker 5 (01:23):
The wood barbecue.
Speaker 1 (01:23):
But if someone else is doing it, I don't want
to have to think. I don't mind taking over doing
the barbecue.
Speaker 3 (01:27):
If I can sit comfortably in a chair with a
glass of wine in my hand and not have to
do anything, I may stop whinging.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
I remember one picnic slash barbecue I went to, they said,
who wants to light the fire?
Speaker 1 (01:38):
I said, well, that'd be me. So you're pretty much
beer in your hand.
Speaker 3 (01:42):
Flamethrower in the oven.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
Sanctioned to light a fire in a park and everyone's going,
good on you.
Speaker 3 (01:47):
Picnics, do they pass the pub test?
Speaker 4 (01:50):
Look, to be fair, I actually think it's more about
the women's preparation and the men's execution. On the very
rare occasion, because a lot of women also end up
doing both.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
Yes, for sure.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
It's great fun, you know, good energy to spend and
be out in the sun with the family, have fun,
eat good food.
Speaker 5 (02:09):
Picnics are fantastic. It's a great way to go and
get some sunshine on your bones and fantastic way to
catch up with family and friends. I don't know who
came up with the idea. I'm at the stage now.
If I get on the ground, it takes me 10
minutes to get up. What's wrong with the picnic table?
Sit at the table. Not on the ground. That's why
(02:29):
they invented roofs, so you didn't have to sit outside.
You've got to put sun cream on. And then you've
got ants to deal with and magpies. If you're down
the beach, you've got to beat the seagulls away with
a burnt stick.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
You know, can I add, even if you get a
picnic table, you have to go with your legs side-saddling
over it. I can't even do that.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
What about when you have to share the picnic table?
The people you don't know. You get other people that
come along and they want to share the picnic table.
Speaker 2 (02:55):
No.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
I tell you, a picnic is no picnic.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
Righto, UT.
Speaker 4 (02:59):
That's enough.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
They lied to us.
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