September 13, 2026 • 52 mins
Growing up, this week’s Money Diarist knew there was no money. She’s a First Nations woman who grew up surrounded by domestic violence, gambling, alcoholism and financial hardship. At nine, she escaped with her mum and brother, quite literally leaving with a backpack and hiding until it was safe to come home. She watched her mum rebuild from absolutely nothing. But while that showed her incredible resilience, it didn’t magically teach her how to manage money. She started working at 14 and spent every dollar she earned. At 19 she became pregnant, at 20 she became a mum, and by 22 she was raising her son alone and studying nursing, determined that life could look different. It wasn’t an overnight transformation. There were years of living paycheck to paycheck, impulsive spending and high-interest loans. Even when she and her now-husband both started earning more, they realised something pretty confronting: more money hadn’t actually changed their financial position. So they changed their habits instead. Now she earns just under $150,000 in nursing leadership, has completed her master’s, has gone from five debts to two in the space of a year, is preparing to build her family’s first home and has started investing for all three of her children. Because they’re small. But her children are growing up talking about investing, saving, bills and what things actually cost. Things she was never taught herself.
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
My name is Natasha Bamblett. I'm a proud First Nations
woman and I'm here to acknowledge country. Hello, beautiful friends.
We gather on the lands of the Aboriginal people. We thank,
acknowledge and respect the Aboriginal people's land that we're gathering
on today. take pleasure in all the land and respect
(00:33):
all that you see. She's on the Money podcast, acknowledges culture, country,
community and connections, bringing you the tools, knowledge and resources
for you to thrive.
Speaker 2 (00:50):
Hello and welcome to She's on the Money, the podcast
that lets you be pervy about other people's money stories
for educational purposes, of course. Welcome back to another one
of our money diaries brought to you by our friends
at Sky Wealth, where I get the absolute privilege of
sitting down with one of our incredible She's on the
Money community members and talking to them all about their journey.
(01:11):
Let's jump straight into it because this week I got
a message and it sounded exactly like this. Hi, She's
on the Money. I'm a First Nations woman who grew
up with domestic violence, financial hardship, and a very clear
understanding that we were poor. That followed me into adulthood.
I made some difficult money choices, financially supported the wrong person,
(01:33):
became a mum at 20, and later found myself raising
my child alone. There were times I was living so
close to payday that I'd sneak a nappy home from
work because I couldn't afford another packet. I'm now married
with three children, have completed a degree and returned for
my master's, worked my way into leadership and now earn
(01:53):
a strong six-figure income. After finding she's on the money,
I'm clearing my debt, changing my habits and beginning the
journey towards buying our first home. Money diarist, are you kidding?
Speaker 3 (02:04):
No.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
Are you for real? That's so exciting. It sounds.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
really good when you say it all together like that. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (02:13):
Do you know why? Because it is really good.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
Thank you. What do you mean?
Speaker 2 (02:18):
And so many of our First Nations friends in our
community really struggle with changing that generational poverty, like going
through having domestic violence in the family, having financial hardship.
It is so easy to just replicate again and again.
It becomes generational. You've broken it. You've changed it.
Speaker 3 (02:37):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
That is so cool.
Speaker 3 (02:39):
All right.
Speaker 2 (02:39):
Let's learn a little bit more about you. Before I
dive into my favorite question, I need to ask, Money Daris,
what grade would you give your money habits from A
through to F if I asked you to give them
a grade?
Speaker 3 (02:50):
I'd say around a C minus still.
Speaker 2 (02:52):
All right. All right. Let's learn more about it. Let's
dive in. Money Daris, can you tell me a little
bit more about your money story?
Speaker 3 (02:59):
Yeah, well, growing up, it was my mum, my dad,
my brother and I, and we were surrounded by a
lot of domestic violence, financial hardship, and we knew that
we had no money. It wasn't a secret. And we
knew that... Like times were tough and when we did
get something that was of value, it wasn't really in
(03:20):
a traditional way either. We did escape that situation, my mum,
my brother and I, when I was around nine. And
so I had to watch my mum rebuild from nothing.
And I watched her go back to uni as an
adult and become a nurse and meet my stepfather who died.
supported us from around age 12 onwards.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
Stop it. Mum sounds like a powerhouse.
Speaker 3 (03:43):
Absolutely. She's definitely the strongest woman I know.
Speaker 2 (03:46):
Oh, and like to leave with like kids, that's crazy.
Like I'm not saying it's crazy to do, like it's
just so hard to do and knowing that you're not
going to land on your feet and you're going to
have to go back to school. She did it anyway. Oh,
I hope that we can get her money diary one day.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
Yeah, I should tell her.
Speaker 2 (04:04):
Oh, you hook us up because I just think that
would be so special. Like what an icon that's already
been through it. Tell me a bit more. So you
got a stepdad who started supporting the family from about
age 12?
Speaker 3 (04:16):
Yeah, so he also was not wealthy or anything, but
he helped mum. He actually had a financial background in
his work role. So he was able to help mum
kind of make better habits as well. That set us
up for the future as a family. We still didn't
make a lot of money as a family or live wealthy.
We knew that everything was tight and what we did
(04:36):
have was a real blessing, but we weren't sort of
living paycheck to paycheck or going without anymore.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
Yeah, that's so nice to hear that it pivoted while
you were still kind of a child. What did that
look like? So in terms of you going, Victoria, we
knew we didn't have money. Was that because that was
the conversation? Was that because you were like, look, it
was obvious? What did that actually look like to you
as a child?
Speaker 3 (05:04):
I think being in a home that's surrounded with DV,
there was a lot of alcoholism and gambling addiction. It
wasn't hidden behind a closed door. The DV, we experienced
it and witnessed it. So you knew when there were
arguments about money or.
We knew that my mum would have to hide money
in order to buy food for us and stuff. Like
(05:26):
it wasn't a safe environment. And when we did escape,
we didn't like have a normal traditional mum and dad
are separating kind of situation. Unfortunately, my dad actually went
to jail for an extended time period. So that gave
my mum an opportunity to escape safely. There was still
(05:47):
the whole, you know, TV Hollywood version where we literally
left with a backpack. for a little while until his
sentencing date. But once that date occurred, we were able
to come back. But coming back, my mom had no job.
She had no money. And so we ended up moving
into my aunt's house where she kind of supported us
(06:09):
or helped us with housing while my mom got her
life rebuilt from nothing again. And eventually we got our
own rental and that's when we then met my stepdad
and everything. So it got better as we got older.
But yeah, we were a part of that. It wasn't
something that was hidden away from us. There was no
kind of, there was no real realistic way that you
(06:29):
could not observe that.
Speaker 2 (06:30):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (06:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
And I ask, and I'm really grateful that you're being
so open with the conversation because I think that it's
something that unfortunately a lot of people can resonate with,
but you're being very generous with sharing so much. So
I'm grateful for that. But When that happened, where was
your mind at as a child? Were you kind of like, yes,
(06:52):
I know we need to get out of this circumstance?
Or were you like, oh, no, I don't know what's
going to go on. Like our life is in turmoil
because like a kid just doesn't get it in the
same way that an adult does. Like you try and
you can see what's going on, but that doesn't mean
you comprehend it.
Speaker 3 (07:07):
Yeah, it's I mean, it's not funny, but it's, you know,
you're what's that you rhetorically say oh well it's funny
stories but I actually remember and I talked to my
mum about this a lot as an adult that I
came to her and I was like why can't we
just go and mum said that's what gave her the
strength to be like yeah okay let's do it.
Speaker 2 (07:26):
Oh my heart you were like um this just doesn't
make sense mum you don't seem to be having a
very good time.
Speaker 3 (07:33):
Yeah. And yeah. And that's what I mean by like,
we were observing it. It wasn't like, oh, mum and
dad are in the room arguing, like the whole house
felt it and walked on eggshells and Yeah. Wow.
Speaker 2 (07:45):
And has that really shaped how you've looked for relationships
and brought up your children?
Speaker 3 (07:51):
I think so. I mean, of course, I am a
lot more observant of people's characters than I think other
women would be or women and men, I guess, because
I've seen red flags. But there's so many different variations
of a red flag in a person that it doesn't
have to be physical abuse or control and coercion to
be not a safe space.
Speaker 2 (08:12):
Yeah, absolutely. You are not wrong there. So tell me about,
you got out, right? And I feel like, I want
to say lucky because none of this is lucky, but
like in my head, I'm like, how good is it
that your dad ended up incarcerated and probably gave your
mom the permission to be a bit more free in
the decisions she was making because if you're saying Victoria
(08:35):
we left and hid for a while that's telling me
you are not safe at all but then knowing that
that person that was the unsafe person was not able
to access you probably gave her the freedom to make
decisions that she otherwise couldn't have.
Speaker 3 (08:50):
Absolutely. We talk about it a lot. My mom and
I are very close. She's my best friend. And we
actually sort of say the what if all the time, like, oh,
what would our lives be like if that never happened?
Because she genuinely doesn't know how we would have eventually
got out. So it really was like a blessing in disguise.
Speaker 1 (09:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:08):
The ducks really were in a row for you guys,
which is like, again, not luck. Like you make those
things happen, but I'm just, I'm so grateful for it.
So Tell me a little bit more about becoming an adult.
So we mentioned your new stepdad at 12. What were
your teenage years like? Did you get a first job?
Did you start earning money? Yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
So I started working from like 14 and I've never
not had a job, but even though I was in
an environment where I could witness how that financial abuse
and hardship impacted someone, I went on the other side
of that, which I guess feeds into that cycle. As
(09:50):
soon as I got money, I was kind of like,
about money, I'm going to spend it. And so I
never implemented any good habits from the get-go. And I
was a lot of trying to keep up with my friends.
Like if we were all going out on a weekend
and going shopping or to the movies, the money that
I earned was how I could tag along. Like my
parents weren't able to give me a pocket money allowance
(10:12):
to go and join them. So as soon as I
got my little 14-year-old job, that money was spent that
same week. So it started very young of going paycheck
to paycheck. And then as I increased my expenses, it
continued to do that. So I got my first full-time
job and I wasn't like, now I can save. I
(10:34):
was like, now I can move out. I can afford
a rental.
Speaker 4 (10:37):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:37):
And it's not lifestyle creep at that point, I don't think.
Because in my head, lifestyle creep is going from you know,
buying a cheap mascara to the more expensive one and
you kind of slip into more expensive habits. But I
think it's just the viewpoint of what finance actually looks
like because you wouldn't have ever been taught, hey, money, Doris,
this is saving, this is investing, like, you know, these
(10:59):
are your buckets, this is how money works. You would just... great,
more money means more things I can pick, right?
Speaker 3 (11:06):
Yes. And my understanding of money growing up was like
money is for the bills. So I was like, well,
I can afford this phone and this car loan and
whatever else bill because I have money now. But there
was no like, but how do you protect that money?
How do you put away for the future and the
bad rainy days? It was just like, no, I can
(11:26):
extend my paycheck to paycheck allowance now so I could
afford more.
Speaker 2 (11:31):
Yeah, 100%. It was like, especially if you don't grow
up with a level of financial literacy yes absolutely especially
in a second stance like the one that your mom
went through like you saw that when money came in
she made a plan for it she made a plan
for it to go out and I think it's interesting
because so many people go well why didn't they just
(11:52):
start saving Can I guess that you didn't know that
you were even meant to?
Speaker 3 (11:57):
Absolutely. There was also nothing left over to save. Like
we grew up on lay-bys. So whenever we did get
something that was of a high value, it was because
mum paid it off for weeks and weeks and she
knew the shoppers because she'd be there every fortnight on
payday making her minimum repayment kind of thing. And so
(12:18):
there was no, yeah, you put money away, it was
always let's make ends meet. And then that whatever's left
would get us what we need for the future. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
And I think that if we look at it through
that lens as well, your mom was probably really good
with money. Cause like you're saying, look, if we made
a decision to get a lay by, she was there
every payday making that happen. Like she had her bills.
She knew what was coming up. Like she didn't have
her head in the sand. She just didn't have enough
and didn't have the level of financial literacy she deserved
(12:48):
to go, well, actually, this is what a really good
plan looks like. This is what we should be working towards.
Speaker 4 (12:54):
Yes. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (12:55):
And it wasn't until we met my stepdad, he just
happened to own his own home and he had a mortgage, obviously.
So when we moved in with him, that was mum's
first experience of a mortgage. So I still didn't see
what it was like for somebody to have to go
through a mortgage process. We just moved into one there
was no like conversations about oh we're saving for a
(13:16):
house deposit and for me to be like what's that
it was just you live in this house now.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
And okay and he owns it and you go okay
that's different because last time I lived in a house
somebody else owned it so this makes sense yes yeah
yeah and I think that that's it's not a bad
thing but so many times this is why people in
your circumstances will carry the money story of I'm just
bad with money or, you know, everyone in my family
is bad with money or, you know, that's just not
(13:43):
what happens because that's your genuine lived experience. Because if
it's not been role model to you, why on earth
would you be able to do it?
Speaker 3 (13:52):
Yes, absolutely. A lot of what I've learned about money
has been in the last couple of years, not even years,
more like 12 months.
Speaker 2 (14:02):
Well, I love that. So tell me a bit more
about becoming an adult. So you lived with your stepdad,
he owned the house, like you didn't really get an
experience of you know, stating for your first home and
that role modelled. Did you move out at 18?
Speaker 3 (14:16):
Pretty much. So I was always a worker. I'd always
had a job. But like I said, I immediately would
be like, how do I extend my expenses to fulfil
this entire check? So as soon as I was able
to get a full time wage, I moved out. And
I had a boyfriend at the time who was I
obviously wanted to live with me and I was really
(14:38):
naive and I was like, oh, we're going to get
married and if we ever want to own a house
like my parents do now, we need good debt, not
bad debt. So I supported him and I would be like, oh,
your car payment that you can't afford, I'll pay it.
Speaker 2 (14:53):
Yeah, because in your head, repayments mean good credit history
and good credit history means you'll be given more credit.
Speaker 3 (14:59):
Yes, yeah. I definitely, I mean, it's hindsight or whatever.
It's in the past I've moved on, but he definitely
took advantage of that. There was a lot of situations
where I, yeah, I look back and I think, why
did I pay for him to live or live with me?
And I paid his bills and I... had this full-time
(15:21):
wage and I had nothing to show for it.
Speaker 2 (15:23):
Yeah because he saw that you would do that and
maybe didn't mention that you should be putting yourself.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
First yeah no definitely not.
Speaker 2 (15:30):
No no he was like great so you've got another
hundred dollars I guess you could give that to me
that is exactly how it happened yeah yeah and you
would go oh yeah you're right and I think it's
so stupid really you know what it's not stupid though
And that's so important to point out. So many of
us look back at our money story and you go,
I was so dumb. But how were you meant to
(15:52):
know things that you hadn't been taught? Like, I'm pretty
sure if I sat you down on that day that
that happened and I said, babe, what's your times tables?
You probably could have told me because you had been
taught those at school. If I'd sat you down and said, hey,
what's the power of compound interest? You'd be like, what?
And that's fine because you had never been taught, but
(16:13):
we can't look back on money decisions that we made
that had no education in making and go, well, that's
because I was stupid. Well, no, you're a smart thing.
You just didn't have the tools and resources available to you.
And I think so many of us are so hard
on ourselves when if your friend was in that situation,
what would you tell them? You wouldn't go, yeah, you're
(16:35):
a bit dumb. That's not how we talk to our friends,
is it?
Speaker 3 (16:39):
I know. We're so much harsher on ourselves.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
And it makes for such a worse journey. Like you
just probably hang it on yourself and go, oh, I'm
an idiot. Like I can't do this and I can't
do that. That doesn't help anything. But also that narrative
is not true. Anyway, I just, I get quite passionate
about that. So tell me, you got out of that relationship?
Speaker 1 (17:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (17:03):
So he's actually the father of my eldest boy. So
we got pregnant at 19 and 20. And by the
age of 22, I kind of came to my senses
and was like, I want more than this. I actually
remember sitting in the car and thinking to myself, is
this as good as it's going to get? Because I
knew that we were living paycheck to paycheck and we
(17:25):
had a child and I had been nothing to show
for it. And it was when I found out I
was pregnant that I was like, I'm going to go
to uni and study and try and have like a
bit of a more successful career for my kid. And
And that's kind of what snowballed into like where I
am today. Still plagued with lots of bad financial choices,
(17:48):
but that was a moment where I was like, yeah,
I can do better than this.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Yeah, I love that. And so you left and what happened?
Speaker 3 (17:55):
I went to uni. It was, I do nursing. So
there was a lot of placements and I was really
fortunate to be supported through my mum to help with
babysitting so I could do that.
Speaker 2 (18:07):
Yeah, because mum's an icon. We already established this.
Speaker 3 (18:11):
Yeah, I followed in her footsteps because she's also a nurse.
So the shift work helped accommodate me doing shift work
where we could tag team with my youngest.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
That's so sweet.
Speaker 3 (18:21):
Yeah, so I had to go a little bit slower. I...
Couldn't do it at the full-time, full courses a semester
like other people, but I would use the third trimester
to try and catch up and not have it extending
too long. And throughout my degree is when I met
my now husband. And although we are in a better
position now, I still had all of those bad habits
(18:44):
of being like paycheck to paycheck and that eventually led
escalated because to study, I had to give up my job.
Not immediately, but by the time I was ready to graduate,
we were making like $ 700 a fortnight out of the
two of us. And we'd had another child together. So
now we had two kids and we had to move
(19:05):
back in with my parents to make ends meet. But
as soon as I graduated... like I thought that would be, oh,
it's okay now. Like we're going to be fine now.
But I still had all those terrible habits that I
couldn't let go of.
Speaker 2 (19:22):
Yeah. And it makes sense because you were comfortable with them.
Like you knew them, like you knew how you spent,
like change sucks. But at what point did you go,
something has to give, like something has to change. This
isn't working.
Speaker 3 (19:36):
That was probably about two years ago now, which is
when I first started to pay attention to money. Although
we'd always been paycheck to paycheck and having children, I
don't know whether I was delusional. and thinking, well, you
can't have everything. I think it's your podcast that says
you can have everything just not at once.
Speaker 2 (19:57):
I do say that. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (19:58):
And I was like, yeah, that's definitely us because we've
got these children. So now we have to pay these
exorbitant daycare fees, but it's not forever. So I kind
of justified never having money. which not in a negative
way because it did make sense like it was the reality,
but I was always like, it'll get better soon. But
it had to take a bit of learning and habits
(20:21):
to really turn that around because I was, you know,
your typical millennial that's consumed by all of the stupid
kitchen gadgets and needing like everything that Kmart has and
all the online shopping. Like I definitely fell into that trap,
very impulsive at purchases. So it really took a minute
to kind of calm down and go like, let's kind
(20:41):
of reevaluate where we are. And that teed up really
well with when I found She's On The Money to
continue doing that.
Speaker 2 (20:49):
I'm so glad you found us, but also low-key Kmart
and kitchen gadgets, they're really fun. So like, I know, like,
I'm not here saying that's not cool. Don't do that. Like,
I get it. It's really cool. I love a kitchen gadget.
But also, we have to make decisions that help future
us and we need to find the balance. And that's
why I say, look, queens, you can have everything. We
(21:11):
just can't have it all at once. Like, we go
through different chapters and we go through different seasons of life.
And like, at the moment, the daycare season, I get it.
I really do. Oh my goodness. Why is it so expensive,
but just also consistently chaos? I was saying to my husband, okay,
it's expensive, but do you know what the cherry on
(21:33):
the top of that is? is the fact that every
time I pick my kid up from daycare, he's like
the most feral version of himself. So it's costing more
for a worse outcome. Like obviously I adore daycare. Don't
get me wrong. Like I don't want people thinking I
don't like it. I really like it. My son adores it.
But if you haven't had a toddler that you've picked
up from daycare and then brought home and they're a
(21:56):
screaming mess, I don't know what you're doing. Like send
me your tips.
Speaker 3 (22:00):
Very true.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
So tell me, now what do you do for work
and how much money do you earn?
Speaker 3 (22:06):
So I'm a nurse. I've stepped into a leadership managerial role.
And with my master's, I went back to uni and
did my master's. I get like a qualification additional wage.
So I make just under $ 150, 000 a year now. What?
Speaker 2 (22:24):
That's crazy cool.
Speaker 3 (22:26):
Yeah, that was another reason why I was kind of like,
we really need to evaluate what we're doing because I've
never earned this much money in my life, but I've
also never had good money habits and I don't want
to ruin that.
Speaker 2 (22:38):
Yeah, and it really does slip through your fingers. I
think that a lot of the time people give themselves
the same narrative that you've just explained where it's like, oh,
when I earn more or, you know, when I'm not
paying daycare fees or when I'm not X, Y, Z,
like then I'll be good at money. But that actually
never comes. And it's the lamest quote in the entire world,
(22:58):
I promise. But everyone's seen it online. I've said it
a million times. If you can't manage $ 10, there's absolutely
no way you could manage $ 10, 000. And I think a
lot of the time people go, yeah, whatever. Like, I'm
not going to make a plan for $ 10. And I go, yeah,
I get it. It sounds a bit lame. But if
you don't do that... you're actually putting yourself in a
(23:20):
bad position because what happens when you get.
Speaker 3 (23:22):
$ 10, 000?
Speaker 2 (23:23):
If you can't make a plan for $ 10 and then
I give you $ 10, 000, I promise you're going to do
what old me used to do and that's gone. I've
already made a plan for it and it's not a
productive one. It's probably a bit of a holiday, maybe
some shoes, nothing good, I promise you.
Speaker 3 (23:40):
Yeah, that's actually exactly what happened to us. So it
was two years ago we moved because I got this
new job that was going to give us a really
nice pay rise. Coincidentally, the job my husband moved into
also gave him a pay rise, but we still didn't
do anything positive for that first 12 months. And then
(24:01):
after that 12 months passed, So we've been in these
new roles for a year. We kind of were like,
we need to sort something out. So that's what we've
been doing for the last 12 months.
Speaker 2 (24:11):
And I think that that can be a bit confronting
as well. Like I'm assuming you got 12 months in
and you and your husband were like, hey, so... we're
in exactly the same position. We've earned more, but we
have the same amount that we always had. Like, is
that what happened?
Speaker 3 (24:25):
Absolutely. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:26):
And it's rude, isn't it? I don't like that at all.
Speaker 3 (24:28):
I know. And it makes me feel guilty because then
I reflect on, I continued all these bad habits.
Speaker 2 (24:35):
Oh, I understand that narrative, but I would argue with
you that there's no point feeling bad about it because
you don't know what you don't know.
Speaker 4 (24:43):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (24:43):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:44):
If you knew better and you weren't doing better at
that point, I'd be like, okay, yeah, you're right. That
probably wasn't ideal. And that was a quote bad habit.
But like, can it be a bad habit if you
didn't know that it was even bad?
Speaker 1 (24:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (24:57):
Yeah. True.
Speaker 2 (24:58):
Like it can't be. Anyway, tell me, what are your
big money goals? What are you currently working towards?
Speaker 3 (25:03):
So we're hoping to build. We've signed all our contracts.
Speaker 2 (25:07):
Oh my God, really? Already? Yes, yes.
Speaker 3 (25:10):
But I'm nervous because I don't really understand it. But
like the money people say it's normal because our land
is not ready to build on until next year. But
we've got to sign all the contracts now. And they said,
but your pre-approval will lapse. You'll have to redo it.
And I was like, okay, I'm happy to do that.
We've obviously been pre-approved in order to sign the contracts,
(25:33):
but now we've technically signed all these contracts, but we
don't have any money to pay it because the bank's
got to go through that whole process again. And they're like, no, no,
that's normal. And I'm like, that's really scary.
Speaker 2 (25:45):
Yeah, it can be normal. But I think that I
would be asking my broker a few more questions about like, well,
why is that normal? Why does the bank do that
so that you fully feel educated in that space? Because
at 3am when you're thinking, I've just made the biggest
financial decision of my life and I'm not entirely sure
why people are making decisions like this. that can be
(26:05):
a bit negative. So like make sure you go back
to your broker with really clear, specific questions and go, hey,
what does this mean? And, you know, tell me why
my pre-approval won't last. I'm pretty sure they're going to
tell you your pre-approval won't last because you only get
pre-approved for about three months or 90 days at a time.
And if the loan doesn't settle, you have to redo it.
(26:26):
But I want that to come from, I guess, your
horse's mouth so that you go, okay, I'm comfortable with that.
And I know what that means.
Speaker 4 (26:33):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (26:34):
Yep. I think I only get nervous though because having
20 years of adulthood of never having money, I'm always
thinking like, oh, well, anything could happen and we could
be back in that position.
Speaker 2 (26:46):
Well, totally. And that's why it's so important to look
at your money goals, look at what you're trying to
achieve and actually create a plan to make sure that's sustainable.
So is that something you've been looking at? Have you
been doing like a budget and a cash flow?
Speaker 4 (26:59):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (27:01):
Funnily enough, even though I've always... been either paycheck to
paycheck or not earning enough. I love an Excel budget
sheet and I love doing the numbers. I've always struggled
to follow through because of my impulsiveness and bad habits though.
Speaker 2 (27:17):
Yeah, I totally get it. And I am such a
spreadsheet girly. Have you done my money masterclass by chance?
Speaker 3 (27:24):
I haven't. No, I did look at the template and
I kind of blended the template that I already use
with yours. Cause I was like, Oh, I've already put
all this effort into creating this template. So I was like,
I don't want to start from scratch.
Speaker 2 (27:41):
Well, I'm going to send you my money masterclass so
that you can kind of start from scratch. Cause it
sounds like you've been using the free budget on our website,
which is amazing. But the money masterclass has a budget
and a cashflow spreadsheet. So basically I know that you
don't want to start again, but in my spreadsheet, if
you put in all of the money that you earn
(28:01):
and what you're spending money on, it will literally spit out, okay,
this is how much goes into your emergency fund. This
is how much goes into your like fund to make
sure that your rego is covered. This is how much
you spend on food, fuel and fun and this goes
here to make a money system that is actually going
to mean that you will not go backwards.
Speaker 3 (28:19):
Yeah, that sounds like what I think then.
Speaker 2 (28:21):
Yeah, I feel like sometimes budgeting is all well and
good but if it just entered into a spreadsheet and
then saved on your desktop and it's not actually being
implemented through your automations or your actual bank accounts, It's
not going to have the power that it needs to have.
And that can be really confronting because I'm sure your
spreadsheet is gorgeous, but it doesn't matter what it looks like.
(28:44):
It needs to be followed through in your everyday life.
And that to me has always been the hard part,
which is why I made an automated system. Because I
was like, if this isn't automated, I'm not going to lie,
I won't do it.
Speaker 3 (28:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (28:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
All right, Money Darius, let's go to a really quick
break because on the flip side, I want to get
your thoughts on investing. I want to talk about how
much this land has cost you. We're going to talk
about personal insurances and your best and worst money habits.
So don't go anywhere. All right, Money Darius, we are back.
Tell me about your superannuation. You're a nurse. Is that
(29:20):
tracking well?
Speaker 3 (29:21):
I hope so. I've looked on ChatGPT after listening to
other money diarists where they talk about what's an appropriate
amount for their age. Mine's sitting at $ 59, 700. Oh, that's good, Queen.
I think it's because my job automatically adds money, which
I didn't realize.
Speaker 2 (29:40):
Nice.
Speaker 3 (29:41):
So, ChatGPT said that's okay for my age. So, I
was like, I won't add anything to it additionally other
than what work's already doing.
Speaker 4 (29:49):
Yes. Yes.
Speaker 2 (29:50):
Fair. And then investing outside of superannuation, is that something
you've thought about or have you just been channeling literally
every dollar into this land purchase?
Speaker 3 (29:59):
A little bit of both. So I obviously, through listening
to the podcast, I was like, what's investing? How do
I get on top of that? And I'll be honest,
I haven't actually put in enough research to understand it.
I have started a sharesies, but I still really don't
know what I'm doing. I'm just like, yeah, here we go.
Throw the money in there. I've only been doing it
(30:21):
since the start of April, maybe. And there's about $ 200 left.
I just do $ 40 a fortnight.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
Yeah. So it's just slowly building up.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (30:30):
And one thing I am proud of is after listening
to the podcast, I've started that shares these kids accounts
for my kids. So I've got three kids and obviously
the youngest gets less than the oldest because I feel
bad about the fact that they're not going to be equal.
Speaker 2 (30:44):
That's okay. But sorry, did you just tell me that
As somebody who grew up in a domestic violence situation,
your mom escaped that. You're now investing for your children's future. Yeah,
it's funny.
Speaker 3 (30:55):
My stepdad said the same thing when I told him.
He was a bit like, oh, oh my God, are
you really? I was like, yes, I need like $ 10, but.
Speaker 2 (31:03):
Sorry, it's not just $ 10. It is not. It's the habit.
It's starting to contribute to their future in a way
that they are going to be able to talk to
you about. Like you didn't grow up with people surrounding
you going, hey, here's a budget. hey, here's money that's
been invested for you for your future. This is why
we invest. Investing is important because of A, B and C. Like, sorry,
(31:26):
you're telling me that's how your kids are going to
grow up? It's not actually about the dollars in the account,
my queen, like they are going to become adults and
they are going to be able to contribute to that themselves,
but they're going to know to do that from the get-go.
Imagine if you were 18 and someone had set you
up with this and you were like, no, that's just
how money works.
Speaker 4 (31:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (31:46):
We're very, that's one thing I think growing up struggling
with money, I guess we're very transparent in our household
of like, it's Sometimes, actually sometimes it's not a good
thing because every payday my kids will be like, hey,
it's your payday this week.
Speaker 2 (31:59):
Where's the dollars?
Speaker 3 (32:01):
They're thinking, is it our payday? I'm like, no, no,
that's my payday. But they're on top of it. They'll
be like, do we get any pocket money? Like, can
I do any chores? And I'm always like transparent in like,
if you want to talk money, then let's talk. This
is how much our current rent is. This is how
much this phone costs. Like, to let them at least
understand that just because we get paid doesn't mean suddenly
(32:24):
we're rich for the week.
Speaker 2 (32:25):
But that's so powerful. And I think so many times,
especially as women, we look at it and we go, oh,
I'm investing for my kids, but it's not much. And
it's honestly not about the amount that you're investing. In fact,
there have been times where I've done financial advice in
the past and told people, hey, you actually need to
(32:45):
stop contributing as much as you're contributing to your kids.
Because as much as we love them and we want
them to thrive, you cannot pour from an empty cup.
And it's actually going to be more financially beneficial for
you to contribute. financially look after yourself and create your
own really big emergency fund and create your own investment
portfolio and just teach them the habits and the consistency
(33:08):
so that they can be successful individually. And I think
that we just go, oh, because there's not thousands in there.
It's kind of not worth it. But that's not the
case at all. Like that's not why you listen to
the She's On The Money podcast. You don't listen to
the She's On The Money podcast because you immediately have thousands,
do you? It's about setting up the habits and creating
(33:28):
the life that you deserve from scratch.
Speaker 3 (33:30):
Yeah, definitely. And we now, obviously, only within the last
few months, we'll talk to them. If they get birthday
money and stuff, we'll automatically say, well, how much is
going in your investment? And they'll obviously be like, oh,
do I have to? Like, I really wanted to buy X,
Y and Z. And I'll be like, you need to
do 20%. Like, let's talk about it.
Speaker 2 (33:48):
Yeah, that's so cool.
Speaker 3 (33:50):
I am obsessed.
Speaker 2 (33:51):
They're going to be like, And you know what? Even
if 16-year-old you was sat down and told about compounding interest,
I think you would have been like, nah, that's not
for me because also I can go to the movies
because that would have been me. Tell me about debt.
You have just talked about purchasing some land and it's
(34:11):
not going to title till next year, but How much
have you purchased it for? What does that look like?
Speaker 3 (34:17):
Yeah, so we've definitely missed the boat on like nice
house and land opportunities. And we've made peace with that
because I really felt like we were being ripped off
of an opportunity. My, pretty much everybody I know bought
around like 2018, 2019, 2020, or we're building, sorry. And
(34:38):
they all did it for about 500K or less. For
the land and our build, we're looking at 870 and
we're getting like basically the same thing that everybody did
six years ago. So I get a little bit annoyed
by but I'm like, that's not anybody else's fault. Like
it's just the way it is.
Speaker 2 (34:58):
And it's also not their journey. So like, yes, you
can see what they have purchased their home for, but
you're the one that is putting investments in your kids' names.
You're the one that has an idea of what your
superannuation looks like. You've even been chat GPT-ing it and
looking at what that means for your future. Like just
because they got a cheaper house than you doesn't mean
(35:21):
that they are more financially secure than you will be
come retirement. I think that there's a misconception that everybody
who bought way back in 2018, 2019 is going to
be so much more financially secure. I mean, they could
be if they were investing, if they were looking at
their superannuation, if they had a good budget and cash
flow system, I'm sure they could be. But that's unfortunately
(35:43):
not the reality of it. a lot of people in
that position go, yeah, we got our house a bit
cheaper so we spend all the rest of the money
that other people have to spend on holidays and stuff.
Speaker 3 (35:52):
Yes, absolutely. And it's always the like shock reaction from
other people who are like, oh, you're paying that much?
And I'm like, that is like we are– actually trying
to not spend that much. That's just the reality of
what it costs, but it's their shock reaction that bothers me.
Speaker 2 (36:11):
Oh, totally. But that is just their experience being compared
to your experience and in a completely different economy. Like pre-COVID, sorry,
if I could go back in time and purchase pre-COVID,
my queen, I would. I just, I didn't have that
opportunity available to me. We ended up purchasing during COVID, which,
(36:33):
you know, financially was a good decision for us. But
There are so many things that if I could go
back in time, you know what I'd buy? So much cryptocurrency. Like,
can you imagine if I just put $ 100 into cryptocurrency
back in 2015? I'd be like rich, rich.
Speaker 3 (36:50):
Yeah, so true.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
But we've all got regrets. I think it's just so
important to always take other people's comments with a grain
of salt.
Speaker 1 (36:57):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (36:58):
Because you could be like, oh, my favorite color is blue.
And they go, ew, I like green. Like, so what's
that got to do with the price of fish? Because like, unfortunately,
their incomes won't be paying your mortgage. So if that's
the case, they don't get to actually have an opinion.
Speaker 3 (37:14):
Yeah, very true.
Speaker 2 (37:15):
So in the bin with them. So tell me, are
there any other costs that aren't included in that figure?
Speaker 3 (37:21):
That should be inclusive of everything that I can account for.
Speaker 2 (37:25):
Very cool. Do you have any other debts?
Speaker 3 (37:28):
Yeah, so we have... From, well, if I go back
12 months ago, we actually had five loans and we
are almost down to two.
Speaker 2 (37:37):
Stop it.
Speaker 3 (37:38):
Yeah. So that was part of the whole like reflection
of we're doing terrible. We need to fix this. Sorry.
Speaker 2 (37:46):
In 12 months, you've gone from five loans to two
and you've still been able to purchase a block of land,
get the pre-approval for that for like within the like
high six figure range.
Speaker 1 (37:58):
What?
Speaker 2 (37:59):
And you're thinking, oh, we're still doing so badly.
Speaker 3 (38:02):
Yeah, yeah, I guess, yeah. I'm always my worst critic.
Speaker 2 (38:06):
Oh, I can be my worst critic too, so line up.
Now tell me what are the two debts that remain
and what do they look like?
Speaker 3 (38:13):
So we've got one debt is the car loan. It's
got about 12K on it and it finishes in I
think about 14 months and the other one is about
12K again or maybe 13 and it finishes in 24 months.
It's a high interest, like one of those... loans you
(38:36):
apply online, you never meet anyone and they just go,
sounds good. The money will be in your account in
a few days. And I did it to get plastic surgery.
So that leads into my impulsiveness as well.
Speaker 2 (38:48):
Yeah. Okay. And when did you get that debt?
Speaker 4 (38:51):
2023.
Speaker 3 (38:51):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (38:53):
And is that something that you've spoken to your mortgage
broker about maybe rolling into a different personal loan? Because
if it's an online... high interest personal loan, and you've
been approved for a mortgage, I'm going to take a
stab in the dark and assume that a bank would
probably approve you for about $ 12, 000 in a personal loan
(39:14):
that maybe would incur less interest.
Speaker 3 (39:16):
I actually have never even considered it. I think because
I've historically been so impulsive and like, oh, there's $ 300
in my bank account, each pay left over. That means
I can get a new car that I just trying
to get rid of everything rather than like actually take
the time to be smart and go, let's reconsolidate it
(39:37):
or anything. I'm just kind of like, don't touch it
because I've already ruined so much.
Speaker 2 (39:42):
No, no, that's where I would get a little bit of, well,
obviously I would never give you financial advice, but... I
feel like that's something you should highlight to them and say, hey,
could you please look into options to refinance this to
a lower interest rate? And then you pay off the
same amount, which means you're not in a different situation.
(40:03):
You'd save some interest and then also probably pay it
off sooner while not having someone take advantage. Because I
feel like a lot of the time, those high interest loans,
they are taking advantage of you. It was so easy
to get because they were like, this is going to
be money in the bank for us.
Speaker 3 (40:19):
Absolutely. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (40:20):
And it just annoys me so much because like, I
don't care why you got the debt, but I care
how you pay off the debt and what that looks
like because you deserve better.
Speaker 3 (40:28):
Yeah. My fear of touching it definitely comes from the
fact that it's not like the first time I've had
a high interest crappy loan. It's like the eighth or
something like I've so often being like oh I need
money don't worry I'll get money by the end of
the night and then I would get the money I'm
very good at paying it back so I've never been
(40:49):
to the point where I have to owe them I've
always paid on time but I would always be like
if they'll give me the money I'll take.
Speaker 2 (40:57):
It yeah and that mentality makes so much sense but
I also now know enough about you that girlfriend Did
you think about going, and I'm not trying to shame you,
I promise, but did you think about going to just
one of the big four banks and getting a personal
loan instead? Or were you like, nah, it's too much paperwork?
Speaker 3 (41:12):
Honestly, it was more of I don't want to be
told no and not knowing better to have a proper
smart conversation. It was just like, who online? and they're
not dodgy but the business is in that they're like
you got money here you go so it was definitely
like a honestly it come from like a place of
shame as well like it's like something going through the
(41:35):
process I felt shame doing because I knew it was
so dumb but I was like this is how we
make ends meet and this is how I'll impulsively get x.
Speaker 2 (41:43):
Y and z totally and I I get the shame
thing because like I remember that was the situation I
was in. You've probably heard my story. I got myself
into more than $ 40, 000 worth of personal debt. And I'm
not saying that that was okay because it wasn't. But
like when I was paying that off, I remember Googling
(42:03):
like interest-free loans and, you know, like, loan consolidations and
stuff like that. And then not wanting to reach out
because I didn't want the person to be like, Oh
my God, that's such a dumb loan. How did you
do that? And then me having to tell them, Oh,
it wasn't even on anything good. Like my situation wasn't
such that I was trying to put food on the table.
(42:24):
Like mine was absolutely discretionary spending. And that made me
feel really guilty, but I didn't want to sit down
with someone and have them go, Oh, why'd you get
this loan? Like, I promise any good broker would never
ask like, and I want to know because I'm pervy,
like not because I'm judging you. Like you said, plastic surgery.
And I was immediately like, what'd you get done? Was
(42:45):
it good? Like that's where my brain went as opposed to, Oh,
I can't believe you do that. So get someone who's
on your team because it is costing you so much
more money to have that loan as opposed to one
that would might be a little bit of an uncomfortable
conversation at the start. But I promise like it wouldn't
be like it's our job.
Speaker 3 (43:05):
Yeah. Yeah. That's a good idea. I'm definitely going to
do that.
Speaker 2 (43:08):
So tell me a little bit more about personal insurances.
Is that something that you've ever looked into and set up?
Speaker 3 (43:15):
I started the process again because of what I've learned
through the podcast. And I booked a call. But I
didn't get the opportunity to answer it. And I just went, oh,
I'll have to call them back. And I haven't done
it yet. But I've only got my super insurance.
Speaker 2 (43:30):
And have you had a look at that? What does
that look like?
Speaker 3 (43:32):
I have looked at it. I think it's like $ 370, 000
for the total permanent disability or death. But it's the,
you have to wait the three months for your income insurance,
like all of them, I guess.
Speaker 2 (43:47):
Yeah, that's pretty standard. I would take a stab in
the dark and again, not advice, but given you've told
me you have three children, I don't think 300-ish grand
is going to be enough if something was to happen
to you. but that's why you have to pick up
the phone. And that's okay. But like you already said,
I need to get that in order and I'm working
on it. But to me, I'm always like, please make
(44:08):
sure that's okay because that's the thing that's going to
make sure that your kids get the life they deserve.
Speaker 3 (44:13):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (44:13):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (44:13):
It's definitely in the to-do basket. I just haven't got
back around to it.
Speaker 2 (44:18):
Totally. All right. Now tell me, what do you think
your best money habit is?
Speaker 3 (44:23):
I think it's taken time, but I've never followed a
financial trend. Like when everybody was getting $ 80 water bottles
or $ 150 work bags and everything like that, it was
never something that I cared for. I love a dupe.
And I... and definitely someone they'll be like, Oh, that's
really nice. Where'd you get it from? And I'll be like,
(44:44):
Oh my God, Amazon or Timu. Like I immediately will
be like, yeah, it's on Shein like, and show people
immediately how to use it to also find the same bargain.
Speaker 2 (44:53):
Oh, I love that. I mean, I don't love Timu
and Shein, so I'll just pretend I haven't heard that,
but I do love an Amazon moment. And I feel
like I'm a resourceful queen with like AliExpress. Like, if
something is for sale, like I found a baby monitor
the other day and I was like, I swear this
looks like an AliExpress thing. And I Googled it and
(45:15):
found the link and purchased it. And it is identical
to the like real version. Cost me like a hundred
dollars and you're a mom, so you'll get this, but
I got two cameras and one like monitor and of
what other people are paying like close to $ 500 for.
And when I started looking further into it, turns out
(45:38):
the quote legit company here in Australia is just drop
shipping the AliExpress one with their label on it.
Speaker 3 (45:44):
Yes, that is actually something I love to do. As
soon as I see something I want, I'll screenshot it
in Google image, reverse search, whatever it's called to find
it on the website first. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (45:55):
And it annoys me so much because I'm like, hold on.
So many people are being taken advantage of here because
that's not what happens. Like, don't get me wrong, happy
to pay for quality. If I look something up and
I'm like, oh, that's legit. Like you're not going to
get a Dyson hairdryer on AliExpress, you know?
Speaker 3 (46:12):
No. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (46:13):
But when I look at something and I go, hold on,
you aren't being fully transparent here. You have found something
on AliExpress and now you're wholesaling it and selling it
as your own. To me, that doesn't feel right.
Speaker 3 (46:26):
Yeah. My current, obviously with building a house, even though
it's not going to be ready for like over 12 months,
I'm looking at furniture. And so I'm doing a lot
of screenshotting of the furniture and finding the exact same item.
It's the exact same image that they use as well
and seeing the markup.
Speaker 2 (46:45):
Isn't it crazy? One of my friends actually purchased a
whole heap of furniture and on AliExpress through a wholesaler
and it came a couple of months ago, it is phenomenal.
I mean, you obviously have to approach all of those
things with caution because obviously some things are definitely not
what they seem. but she did all the research. She
had all of these reviews. She'd been talking to this
(47:07):
person for ages, then did a bulk order. And I
think it cost her like $ 5, 000, which is a lot
of money, but she got like $ 30, 000 worth of furniture.
Speaker 3 (47:17):
Yes. Yeah. Love that.
Speaker 2 (47:19):
Crazy. Let's flip the narrative though. What's your worst money habit?
Speaker 3 (47:24):
I think my worst money habit would be that I'm
still very impulsive. So although I can easily bypass whatever's trending,
if there's something else that I've determined I need that,
I can't actually not think about it. So for example,
with moving and building, even though it is a fair
while away, I can't stop thinking about it. And I'll
(47:45):
go and like lay by towels for the new house
that doesn't even exist yet. It's still a patch of dirt.
Speaker 2 (47:50):
But that's exciting.
Speaker 3 (47:52):
And I mean.
Speaker 2 (47:53):
If you make a big spreadsheet of everything that you're
purchasing and need to purchase, like we might be getting
a really good deal, but the impulsive side of it,
probably not ideal.
Speaker 4 (48:03):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (48:03):
It's the impulsiveness and the need to do it straight away.
Speaker 2 (48:06):
Yeah. Is there something that you've been trying to implement
to combat that? Like, have you been like, look, I've
been really trying or are you like, nah, just still
buy the towels?
Speaker 3 (48:15):
A bit of both. I have actually, funny, I did
make a spreadsheet of everything that I looked at and
would like, and I've kind of gone, what am I
looking at that I can't stop thinking about? And I've
kind of highlighted those to be like, okay, well, let's
just get those by the end of the year. And
the other part, I won't even look at it. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (48:34):
So fair. So fair.
Speaker 3 (48:35):
Try and take it off my mind.
Speaker 4 (48:37):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (48:37):
No, I get that. All right. I want to reflect
on everything you've just told me. Like we started your
money story and it started with, I'm a first nations
woman who grew up in a family violence situation. your mom,
your brother, and you got out of that situation, started
from scratch, you're now earning 150 grand plus. like you've
(48:59):
got these epic money goals. You've just like purchased a
block of land. You're investing for your kids. You're smashing
down your debt. Like you've already made the call to
get personal insurances.
Speaker 3 (49:09):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (49:09):
You sound a little bit like me and that we
sometimes need to pick up our phone when it calls,
but like, that's not the worst thing ever. But you
gave this person that we just had a really beautiful
conversation about a C minus. Do you feel like that's reflective?
Speaker 3 (49:23):
Maybe a B minus. I am a really harsh person.
I think as well, I'm very all or nothing. And
because I'm still so early in flipping around these habits,
I feel like I'm in the midst of it. I'm
right in the guts of it all. I'm not on
the other end yet to sit back and reflect and
be like super proud. But I also have to realize
(49:44):
it's a never ending journey. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (49:45):
I was about to say, well, when's that? Like, when
do we actually sit down? Like, do we sit down?
Is it when you're in your house and I come
over for a cup of tea and you say, Victoria,
I've made it? Because I can almost guarantee you go, yep,
now we are trying to make sure that we cash
flow these mortgage repayments for the next 30 years. And
then I go, okay, cool. Do I come back in
30 years? And you go, yeah, but then also we
(50:07):
need to talk about our super. Like, I think we
need to learn to enjoy the journey because my queen,
your journey has been nothing short of epic. Like, are
you kidding? Now you're like investing for your kids and
you've bought your dream property. And I know analysis, paralysis
and comparison culture is killing you at the moment, but
like run your own race. You're doing really well.
Speaker 3 (50:27):
Yeah. I think I definitely need to slow down and
appreciate where I've come from.
Speaker 2 (50:33):
A hundred percent. Like if I had started in the
same position as you and had achieved exactly what you
had achieved, I would be insanely proud of myself. But
it sounds like especially like just reflecting on the conversation
we've just had where you said, oh yeah, heap of
our friends purchased in 2018, 2019. I reckon if I
lined up those friends, they have a number of privileges
(50:54):
you didn't have.
Speaker 3 (50:55):
Yeah, definitely.
Speaker 2 (50:56):
Yet you've still achieved exactly what they achieved. Like that
is out of this world cool. Like I just, I'm
so excited because I know what that means, but I
don't think you see how cool you are yet. Oh, thanks.
And that's okay. That's my job. I'm going to keep
working on that money, Doris. I wish we had more
time to hang out today. It has been an absolute pleasure.
(51:16):
Thank you for sharing your journey and having a really
open and candid conversation with us. I just, I hope
we get to keep in touch and I hope that
we get to cross paths in person at some point.
Speaker 3 (51:26):
Thank you. Thank you so much for having me.
Speaker 4 (51:33):
The advice shared on She's on the Money is general
in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's
on the Money exists purely for educational purposes and should
not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision.
Speaker 2 (51:46):
If you do choose to buy a financial product, read the.
Speaker 4 (51:49):
PDS, TMD and obtain appropriate financial.
Speaker 2 (51:52):
Advice tailored towards your needs.
Speaker 4 (51:54):
Victoria Devine and She's On The Money are authorised representatives
of MoneySherpa PTY LTD ABN 321 649 27708 AFSL 451 289.
My name is Natasha Bamblett. I'm a proud First Nations
woman and I'm here to acknowledge country. Hello, beautiful friends.
We gather on the lands of the Aboriginal people. We thank,
acknowledge and respect the Aboriginal people's land that we're gathering
on today. take pleasure in all the land and respect
(00:33):
all that you see. She's on the Money podcast, acknowledges culture, country,
community and connections, bringing you the tools, knowledge and resources
for you to thrive.
Speaker 2 (00:50):
Hello and welcome to She's on the Money, the podcast
that lets you be pervy about other people's money stories
for educational purposes, of course. Welcome back to another one
of our money diaries brought to you by our friends
at Sky Wealth, where I get the absolute privilege of
sitting down with one of our incredible She's on the
Money community members and talking to them all about their journey.
(01:11):
Let's jump straight into it because this week I got
a message and it sounded exactly like this. Hi, She's
on the Money. I'm a First Nations woman who grew
up with domestic violence, financial hardship, and a very clear
understanding that we were poor. That followed me into adulthood.
I made some difficult money choices, financially supported the wrong person,
(01:33):
became a mum at 20, and later found myself raising
my child alone. There were times I was living so
close to payday that I'd sneak a nappy home from
work because I couldn't afford another packet. I'm now married
with three children, have completed a degree and returned for
my master's, worked my way into leadership and now earn
(01:53):
a strong six-figure income. After finding she's on the money,
I'm clearing my debt, changing my habits and beginning the
journey towards buying our first home. Money diarist, are you kidding?
Speaker 3 (02:04):
No.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
Are you for real? That's so exciting. It sounds.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
really good when you say it all together like that. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (02:13):
Do you know why? Because it is really good.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
Thank you. What do you mean?
Speaker 2 (02:18):
And so many of our First Nations friends in our
community really struggle with changing that generational poverty, like going
through having domestic violence in the family, having financial hardship.
It is so easy to just replicate again and again.
It becomes generational. You've broken it. You've changed it.
Speaker 3 (02:37):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
That is so cool.
Speaker 3 (02:39):
All right.
Speaker 2 (02:39):
Let's learn a little bit more about you. Before I
dive into my favorite question, I need to ask, Money Daris,
what grade would you give your money habits from A
through to F if I asked you to give them
a grade?
Speaker 3 (02:50):
I'd say around a C minus still.
Speaker 2 (02:52):
All right. All right. Let's learn more about it. Let's
dive in. Money Daris, can you tell me a little
bit more about your money story?
Speaker 3 (02:59):
Yeah, well, growing up, it was my mum, my dad,
my brother and I, and we were surrounded by a
lot of domestic violence, financial hardship, and we knew that
we had no money. It wasn't a secret. And we
knew that... Like times were tough and when we did
get something that was of value, it wasn't really in
(03:20):
a traditional way either. We did escape that situation, my mum,
my brother and I, when I was around nine. And
so I had to watch my mum rebuild from nothing.
And I watched her go back to uni as an
adult and become a nurse and meet my stepfather who died.
supported us from around age 12 onwards.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
Stop it. Mum sounds like a powerhouse.
Speaker 3 (03:43):
Absolutely. She's definitely the strongest woman I know.
Speaker 2 (03:46):
Oh, and like to leave with like kids, that's crazy.
Like I'm not saying it's crazy to do, like it's
just so hard to do and knowing that you're not
going to land on your feet and you're going to
have to go back to school. She did it anyway. Oh,
I hope that we can get her money diary one day.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
Yeah, I should tell her.
Speaker 2 (04:04):
Oh, you hook us up because I just think that
would be so special. Like what an icon that's already
been through it. Tell me a bit more. So you
got a stepdad who started supporting the family from about
age 12?
Speaker 3 (04:16):
Yeah, so he also was not wealthy or anything, but
he helped mum. He actually had a financial background in
his work role. So he was able to help mum
kind of make better habits as well. That set us
up for the future as a family. We still didn't
make a lot of money as a family or live wealthy.
We knew that everything was tight and what we did
(04:36):
have was a real blessing, but we weren't sort of
living paycheck to paycheck or going without anymore.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
Yeah, that's so nice to hear that it pivoted while
you were still kind of a child. What did that
look like? So in terms of you going, Victoria, we
knew we didn't have money. Was that because that was
the conversation? Was that because you were like, look, it
was obvious? What did that actually look like to you
as a child?
Speaker 3 (05:04):
I think being in a home that's surrounded with DV,
there was a lot of alcoholism and gambling addiction. It
wasn't hidden behind a closed door. The DV, we experienced
it and witnessed it. So you knew when there were
arguments about money or.
We knew that my mum would have to hide money
in order to buy food for us and stuff. Like
(05:26):
it wasn't a safe environment. And when we did escape,
we didn't like have a normal traditional mum and dad
are separating kind of situation. Unfortunately, my dad actually went
to jail for an extended time period. So that gave
my mum an opportunity to escape safely. There was still
(05:47):
the whole, you know, TV Hollywood version where we literally
left with a backpack. for a little while until his
sentencing date. But once that date occurred, we were able
to come back. But coming back, my mom had no job.
She had no money. And so we ended up moving
into my aunt's house where she kind of supported us
(06:09):
or helped us with housing while my mom got her
life rebuilt from nothing again. And eventually we got our
own rental and that's when we then met my stepdad
and everything. So it got better as we got older.
But yeah, we were a part of that. It wasn't
something that was hidden away from us. There was no
kind of, there was no real realistic way that you
(06:29):
could not observe that.
Speaker 2 (06:30):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (06:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
And I ask, and I'm really grateful that you're being
so open with the conversation because I think that it's
something that unfortunately a lot of people can resonate with,
but you're being very generous with sharing so much. So
I'm grateful for that. But When that happened, where was
your mind at as a child? Were you kind of like, yes,
(06:52):
I know we need to get out of this circumstance?
Or were you like, oh, no, I don't know what's
going to go on. Like our life is in turmoil
because like a kid just doesn't get it in the
same way that an adult does. Like you try and
you can see what's going on, but that doesn't mean
you comprehend it.
Speaker 3 (07:07):
Yeah, it's I mean, it's not funny, but it's, you know,
you're what's that you rhetorically say oh well it's funny
stories but I actually remember and I talked to my
mum about this a lot as an adult that I
came to her and I was like why can't we
just go and mum said that's what gave her the
strength to be like yeah okay let's do it.
Speaker 2 (07:26):
Oh my heart you were like um this just doesn't
make sense mum you don't seem to be having a
very good time.
Speaker 3 (07:33):
Yeah. And yeah. And that's what I mean by like,
we were observing it. It wasn't like, oh, mum and
dad are in the room arguing, like the whole house
felt it and walked on eggshells and Yeah. Wow.
Speaker 2 (07:45):
And has that really shaped how you've looked for relationships
and brought up your children?
Speaker 3 (07:51):
I think so. I mean, of course, I am a
lot more observant of people's characters than I think other
women would be or women and men, I guess, because
I've seen red flags. But there's so many different variations
of a red flag in a person that it doesn't
have to be physical abuse or control and coercion to
be not a safe space.
Speaker 2 (08:12):
Yeah, absolutely. You are not wrong there. So tell me about,
you got out, right? And I feel like, I want
to say lucky because none of this is lucky, but
like in my head, I'm like, how good is it
that your dad ended up incarcerated and probably gave your
mom the permission to be a bit more free in
the decisions she was making because if you're saying Victoria
(08:35):
we left and hid for a while that's telling me
you are not safe at all but then knowing that
that person that was the unsafe person was not able
to access you probably gave her the freedom to make
decisions that she otherwise couldn't have.
Speaker 3 (08:50):
Absolutely. We talk about it a lot. My mom and
I are very close. She's my best friend. And we
actually sort of say the what if all the time, like, oh,
what would our lives be like if that never happened?
Because she genuinely doesn't know how we would have eventually
got out. So it really was like a blessing in disguise.
Speaker 1 (09:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:08):
The ducks really were in a row for you guys,
which is like, again, not luck. Like you make those
things happen, but I'm just, I'm so grateful for it.
So Tell me a little bit more about becoming an adult.
So we mentioned your new stepdad at 12. What were
your teenage years like? Did you get a first job?
Did you start earning money? Yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
So I started working from like 14 and I've never
not had a job, but even though I was in
an environment where I could witness how that financial abuse
and hardship impacted someone, I went on the other side
of that, which I guess feeds into that cycle. As
(09:50):
soon as I got money, I was kind of like,
about money, I'm going to spend it. And so I
never implemented any good habits from the get-go. And I
was a lot of trying to keep up with my friends.
Like if we were all going out on a weekend
and going shopping or to the movies, the money that
I earned was how I could tag along. Like my
parents weren't able to give me a pocket money allowance
(10:12):
to go and join them. So as soon as I
got my little 14-year-old job, that money was spent that
same week. So it started very young of going paycheck
to paycheck. And then as I increased my expenses, it
continued to do that. So I got my first full-time
job and I wasn't like, now I can save. I
(10:34):
was like, now I can move out. I can afford
a rental.
Speaker 4 (10:37):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:37):
And it's not lifestyle creep at that point, I don't think.
Because in my head, lifestyle creep is going from you know,
buying a cheap mascara to the more expensive one and
you kind of slip into more expensive habits. But I
think it's just the viewpoint of what finance actually looks
like because you wouldn't have ever been taught, hey, money, Doris,
this is saving, this is investing, like, you know, these
(10:59):
are your buckets, this is how money works. You would just... great,
more money means more things I can pick, right?
Speaker 3 (11:06):
Yes. And my understanding of money growing up was like
money is for the bills. So I was like, well,
I can afford this phone and this car loan and
whatever else bill because I have money now. But there
was no like, but how do you protect that money?
How do you put away for the future and the
bad rainy days? It was just like, no, I can
(11:26):
extend my paycheck to paycheck allowance now so I could
afford more.
Speaker 2 (11:31):
Yeah, 100%. It was like, especially if you don't grow
up with a level of financial literacy yes absolutely especially
in a second stance like the one that your mom
went through like you saw that when money came in
she made a plan for it she made a plan
for it to go out and I think it's interesting
because so many people go well why didn't they just
(11:52):
start saving Can I guess that you didn't know that
you were even meant to?
Speaker 3 (11:57):
Absolutely. There was also nothing left over to save. Like
we grew up on lay-bys. So whenever we did get
something that was of a high value, it was because
mum paid it off for weeks and weeks and she
knew the shoppers because she'd be there every fortnight on
payday making her minimum repayment kind of thing. And so
(12:18):
there was no, yeah, you put money away, it was
always let's make ends meet. And then that whatever's left
would get us what we need for the future. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
And I think that if we look at it through
that lens as well, your mom was probably really good
with money. Cause like you're saying, look, if we made
a decision to get a lay by, she was there
every payday making that happen. Like she had her bills.
She knew what was coming up. Like she didn't have
her head in the sand. She just didn't have enough
and didn't have the level of financial literacy she deserved
(12:48):
to go, well, actually, this is what a really good
plan looks like. This is what we should be working towards.
Speaker 4 (12:54):
Yes. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (12:55):
And it wasn't until we met my stepdad, he just
happened to own his own home and he had a mortgage, obviously.
So when we moved in with him, that was mum's
first experience of a mortgage. So I still didn't see
what it was like for somebody to have to go
through a mortgage process. We just moved into one there
was no like conversations about oh we're saving for a
(13:16):
house deposit and for me to be like what's that
it was just you live in this house now.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
And okay and he owns it and you go okay
that's different because last time I lived in a house
somebody else owned it so this makes sense yes yeah
yeah and I think that that's it's not a bad
thing but so many times this is why people in
your circumstances will carry the money story of I'm just
bad with money or, you know, everyone in my family
is bad with money or, you know, that's just not
(13:43):
what happens because that's your genuine lived experience. Because if
it's not been role model to you, why on earth
would you be able to do it?
Speaker 3 (13:52):
Yes, absolutely. A lot of what I've learned about money
has been in the last couple of years, not even years,
more like 12 months.
Speaker 2 (14:02):
Well, I love that. So tell me a bit more
about becoming an adult. So you lived with your stepdad,
he owned the house, like you didn't really get an
experience of you know, stating for your first home and
that role modelled. Did you move out at 18?
Speaker 3 (14:16):
Pretty much. So I was always a worker. I'd always
had a job. But like I said, I immediately would
be like, how do I extend my expenses to fulfil
this entire check? So as soon as I was able
to get a full time wage, I moved out. And
I had a boyfriend at the time who was I
obviously wanted to live with me and I was really
(14:38):
naive and I was like, oh, we're going to get
married and if we ever want to own a house
like my parents do now, we need good debt, not
bad debt. So I supported him and I would be like, oh,
your car payment that you can't afford, I'll pay it.
Speaker 2 (14:53):
Yeah, because in your head, repayments mean good credit history
and good credit history means you'll be given more credit.
Speaker 3 (14:59):
Yes, yeah. I definitely, I mean, it's hindsight or whatever.
It's in the past I've moved on, but he definitely
took advantage of that. There was a lot of situations
where I, yeah, I look back and I think, why
did I pay for him to live or live with me?
And I paid his bills and I... had this full-time
(15:21):
wage and I had nothing to show for it.
Speaker 2 (15:23):
Yeah because he saw that you would do that and
maybe didn't mention that you should be putting yourself.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
First yeah no definitely not.
Speaker 2 (15:30):
No no he was like great so you've got another
hundred dollars I guess you could give that to me
that is exactly how it happened yeah yeah and you
would go oh yeah you're right and I think it's
so stupid really you know what it's not stupid though
And that's so important to point out. So many of
us look back at our money story and you go,
I was so dumb. But how were you meant to
(15:52):
know things that you hadn't been taught? Like, I'm pretty
sure if I sat you down on that day that
that happened and I said, babe, what's your times tables?
You probably could have told me because you had been
taught those at school. If I'd sat you down and said, hey,
what's the power of compound interest? You'd be like, what?
And that's fine because you had never been taught, but
(16:13):
we can't look back on money decisions that we made
that had no education in making and go, well, that's
because I was stupid. Well, no, you're a smart thing.
You just didn't have the tools and resources available to you.
And I think so many of us are so hard
on ourselves when if your friend was in that situation,
what would you tell them? You wouldn't go, yeah, you're
(16:35):
a bit dumb. That's not how we talk to our friends,
is it?
Speaker 3 (16:39):
I know. We're so much harsher on ourselves.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
And it makes for such a worse journey. Like you
just probably hang it on yourself and go, oh, I'm
an idiot. Like I can't do this and I can't
do that. That doesn't help anything. But also that narrative
is not true. Anyway, I just, I get quite passionate
about that. So tell me, you got out of that relationship?
Speaker 1 (17:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (17:03):
So he's actually the father of my eldest boy. So
we got pregnant at 19 and 20. And by the
age of 22, I kind of came to my senses
and was like, I want more than this. I actually
remember sitting in the car and thinking to myself, is
this as good as it's going to get? Because I
knew that we were living paycheck to paycheck and we
(17:25):
had a child and I had been nothing to show
for it. And it was when I found out I
was pregnant that I was like, I'm going to go
to uni and study and try and have like a
bit of a more successful career for my kid. And
And that's kind of what snowballed into like where I
am today. Still plagued with lots of bad financial choices,
(17:48):
but that was a moment where I was like, yeah,
I can do better than this.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Yeah, I love that. And so you left and what happened?
Speaker 3 (17:55):
I went to uni. It was, I do nursing. So
there was a lot of placements and I was really
fortunate to be supported through my mum to help with
babysitting so I could do that.
Speaker 2 (18:07):
Yeah, because mum's an icon. We already established this.
Speaker 3 (18:11):
Yeah, I followed in her footsteps because she's also a nurse.
So the shift work helped accommodate me doing shift work
where we could tag team with my youngest.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
That's so sweet.
Speaker 3 (18:21):
Yeah, so I had to go a little bit slower. I...
Couldn't do it at the full-time, full courses a semester
like other people, but I would use the third trimester
to try and catch up and not have it extending
too long. And throughout my degree is when I met
my now husband. And although we are in a better
position now, I still had all of those bad habits
(18:44):
of being like paycheck to paycheck and that eventually led
escalated because to study, I had to give up my job.
Not immediately, but by the time I was ready to graduate,
we were making like $ 700 a fortnight out of the
two of us. And we'd had another child together. So
now we had two kids and we had to move
(19:05):
back in with my parents to make ends meet. But
as soon as I graduated... like I thought that would be, oh,
it's okay now. Like we're going to be fine now.
But I still had all those terrible habits that I
couldn't let go of.
Speaker 2 (19:22):
Yeah. And it makes sense because you were comfortable with them.
Like you knew them, like you knew how you spent,
like change sucks. But at what point did you go,
something has to give, like something has to change. This
isn't working.
Speaker 3 (19:36):
That was probably about two years ago now, which is
when I first started to pay attention to money. Although
we'd always been paycheck to paycheck and having children, I
don't know whether I was delusional. and thinking, well, you
can't have everything. I think it's your podcast that says
you can have everything just not at once.
Speaker 2 (19:57):
I do say that. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (19:58):
And I was like, yeah, that's definitely us because we've
got these children. So now we have to pay these
exorbitant daycare fees, but it's not forever. So I kind
of justified never having money. which not in a negative
way because it did make sense like it was the reality,
but I was always like, it'll get better soon. But
it had to take a bit of learning and habits
(20:21):
to really turn that around because I was, you know,
your typical millennial that's consumed by all of the stupid
kitchen gadgets and needing like everything that Kmart has and
all the online shopping. Like I definitely fell into that trap,
very impulsive at purchases. So it really took a minute
to kind of calm down and go like, let's kind
(20:41):
of reevaluate where we are. And that teed up really
well with when I found She's On The Money to
continue doing that.
Speaker 2 (20:49):
I'm so glad you found us, but also low-key Kmart
and kitchen gadgets, they're really fun. So like, I know, like,
I'm not here saying that's not cool. Don't do that. Like,
I get it. It's really cool. I love a kitchen gadget.
But also, we have to make decisions that help future
us and we need to find the balance. And that's
why I say, look, queens, you can have everything. We
(21:11):
just can't have it all at once. Like, we go
through different chapters and we go through different seasons of life.
And like, at the moment, the daycare season, I get it.
I really do. Oh my goodness. Why is it so expensive,
but just also consistently chaos? I was saying to my husband, okay,
it's expensive, but do you know what the cherry on
(21:33):
the top of that is? is the fact that every
time I pick my kid up from daycare, he's like
the most feral version of himself. So it's costing more
for a worse outcome. Like obviously I adore daycare. Don't
get me wrong. Like I don't want people thinking I
don't like it. I really like it. My son adores it.
But if you haven't had a toddler that you've picked
up from daycare and then brought home and they're a
(21:56):
screaming mess, I don't know what you're doing. Like send
me your tips.
Speaker 3 (22:00):
Very true.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
So tell me, now what do you do for work
and how much money do you earn?
Speaker 3 (22:06):
So I'm a nurse. I've stepped into a leadership managerial role.
And with my master's, I went back to uni and
did my master's. I get like a qualification additional wage.
So I make just under $ 150, 000 a year now. What?
Speaker 2 (22:24):
That's crazy cool.
Speaker 3 (22:26):
Yeah, that was another reason why I was kind of like,
we really need to evaluate what we're doing because I've
never earned this much money in my life, but I've
also never had good money habits and I don't want
to ruin that.
Speaker 2 (22:38):
Yeah, and it really does slip through your fingers. I
think that a lot of the time people give themselves
the same narrative that you've just explained where it's like, oh,
when I earn more or, you know, when I'm not
paying daycare fees or when I'm not X, Y, Z,
like then I'll be good at money. But that actually
never comes. And it's the lamest quote in the entire world,
(22:58):
I promise. But everyone's seen it online. I've said it
a million times. If you can't manage $ 10, there's absolutely
no way you could manage $ 10, 000. And I think a
lot of the time people go, yeah, whatever. Like, I'm
not going to make a plan for $ 10. And I go, yeah,
I get it. It sounds a bit lame. But if
you don't do that... you're actually putting yourself in a
(23:20):
bad position because what happens when you get.
Speaker 3 (23:22):
$ 10, 000?
Speaker 2 (23:23):
If you can't make a plan for $ 10 and then
I give you $ 10, 000, I promise you're going to do
what old me used to do and that's gone. I've
already made a plan for it and it's not a
productive one. It's probably a bit of a holiday, maybe
some shoes, nothing good, I promise you.
Speaker 3 (23:40):
Yeah, that's actually exactly what happened to us. So it
was two years ago we moved because I got this
new job that was going to give us a really
nice pay rise. Coincidentally, the job my husband moved into
also gave him a pay rise, but we still didn't
do anything positive for that first 12 months. And then
(24:01):
after that 12 months passed, So we've been in these
new roles for a year. We kind of were like,
we need to sort something out. So that's what we've
been doing for the last 12 months.
Speaker 2 (24:11):
And I think that that can be a bit confronting
as well. Like I'm assuming you got 12 months in
and you and your husband were like, hey, so... we're
in exactly the same position. We've earned more, but we
have the same amount that we always had. Like, is
that what happened?
Speaker 3 (24:25):
Absolutely. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:26):
And it's rude, isn't it? I don't like that at all.
Speaker 3 (24:28):
I know. And it makes me feel guilty because then
I reflect on, I continued all these bad habits.
Speaker 2 (24:35):
Oh, I understand that narrative, but I would argue with
you that there's no point feeling bad about it because
you don't know what you don't know.
Speaker 4 (24:43):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (24:43):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:44):
If you knew better and you weren't doing better at
that point, I'd be like, okay, yeah, you're right. That
probably wasn't ideal. And that was a quote bad habit.
But like, can it be a bad habit if you
didn't know that it was even bad?
Speaker 1 (24:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (24:57):
Yeah. True.
Speaker 2 (24:58):
Like it can't be. Anyway, tell me, what are your
big money goals? What are you currently working towards?
Speaker 3 (25:03):
So we're hoping to build. We've signed all our contracts.
Speaker 2 (25:07):
Oh my God, really? Already? Yes, yes.
Speaker 3 (25:10):
But I'm nervous because I don't really understand it. But
like the money people say it's normal because our land
is not ready to build on until next year. But
we've got to sign all the contracts now. And they said,
but your pre-approval will lapse. You'll have to redo it.
And I was like, okay, I'm happy to do that.
We've obviously been pre-approved in order to sign the contracts,
(25:33):
but now we've technically signed all these contracts, but we
don't have any money to pay it because the bank's
got to go through that whole process again. And they're like, no, no,
that's normal. And I'm like, that's really scary.
Speaker 2 (25:45):
Yeah, it can be normal. But I think that I
would be asking my broker a few more questions about like, well,
why is that normal? Why does the bank do that
so that you fully feel educated in that space? Because
at 3am when you're thinking, I've just made the biggest
financial decision of my life and I'm not entirely sure
why people are making decisions like this. that can be
(26:05):
a bit negative. So like make sure you go back
to your broker with really clear, specific questions and go, hey,
what does this mean? And, you know, tell me why
my pre-approval won't last. I'm pretty sure they're going to
tell you your pre-approval won't last because you only get
pre-approved for about three months or 90 days at a time.
And if the loan doesn't settle, you have to redo it.
(26:26):
But I want that to come from, I guess, your
horse's mouth so that you go, okay, I'm comfortable with that.
And I know what that means.
Speaker 4 (26:33):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (26:34):
Yep. I think I only get nervous though because having
20 years of adulthood of never having money, I'm always
thinking like, oh, well, anything could happen and we could
be back in that position.
Speaker 2 (26:46):
Well, totally. And that's why it's so important to look
at your money goals, look at what you're trying to
achieve and actually create a plan to make sure that's sustainable.
So is that something you've been looking at? Have you
been doing like a budget and a cash flow?
Speaker 4 (26:59):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (27:01):
Funnily enough, even though I've always... been either paycheck to
paycheck or not earning enough. I love an Excel budget
sheet and I love doing the numbers. I've always struggled
to follow through because of my impulsiveness and bad habits though.
Speaker 2 (27:17):
Yeah, I totally get it. And I am such a
spreadsheet girly. Have you done my money masterclass by chance?
Speaker 3 (27:24):
I haven't. No, I did look at the template and
I kind of blended the template that I already use
with yours. Cause I was like, Oh, I've already put
all this effort into creating this template. So I was like,
I don't want to start from scratch.
Speaker 2 (27:41):
Well, I'm going to send you my money masterclass so
that you can kind of start from scratch. Cause it
sounds like you've been using the free budget on our website,
which is amazing. But the money masterclass has a budget
and a cashflow spreadsheet. So basically I know that you
don't want to start again, but in my spreadsheet, if
you put in all of the money that you earn
(28:01):
and what you're spending money on, it will literally spit out, okay,
this is how much goes into your emergency fund. This
is how much goes into your like fund to make
sure that your rego is covered. This is how much
you spend on food, fuel and fun and this goes
here to make a money system that is actually going
to mean that you will not go backwards.
Speaker 3 (28:19):
Yeah, that sounds like what I think then.
Speaker 2 (28:21):
Yeah, I feel like sometimes budgeting is all well and
good but if it just entered into a spreadsheet and
then saved on your desktop and it's not actually being
implemented through your automations or your actual bank accounts, It's
not going to have the power that it needs to have.
And that can be really confronting because I'm sure your
spreadsheet is gorgeous, but it doesn't matter what it looks like.
(28:44):
It needs to be followed through in your everyday life.
And that to me has always been the hard part,
which is why I made an automated system. Because I
was like, if this isn't automated, I'm not going to lie,
I won't do it.
Speaker 3 (28:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (28:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
All right, Money Darius, let's go to a really quick
break because on the flip side, I want to get
your thoughts on investing. I want to talk about how
much this land has cost you. We're going to talk
about personal insurances and your best and worst money habits.
So don't go anywhere. All right, Money Darius, we are back.
Tell me about your superannuation. You're a nurse. Is that
(29:20):
tracking well?
Speaker 3 (29:21):
I hope so. I've looked on ChatGPT after listening to
other money diarists where they talk about what's an appropriate
amount for their age. Mine's sitting at $ 59, 700. Oh, that's good, Queen.
I think it's because my job automatically adds money, which
I didn't realize.
Speaker 2 (29:40):
Nice.
Speaker 3 (29:41):
So, ChatGPT said that's okay for my age. So, I
was like, I won't add anything to it additionally other
than what work's already doing.
Speaker 4 (29:49):
Yes. Yes.
Speaker 2 (29:50):
Fair. And then investing outside of superannuation, is that something
you've thought about or have you just been channeling literally
every dollar into this land purchase?
Speaker 3 (29:59):
A little bit of both. So I obviously, through listening
to the podcast, I was like, what's investing? How do
I get on top of that? And I'll be honest,
I haven't actually put in enough research to understand it.
I have started a sharesies, but I still really don't
know what I'm doing. I'm just like, yeah, here we go.
Throw the money in there. I've only been doing it
(30:21):
since the start of April, maybe. And there's about $ 200 left.
I just do $ 40 a fortnight.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
Yeah. So it's just slowly building up.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (30:30):
And one thing I am proud of is after listening
to the podcast, I've started that shares these kids accounts
for my kids. So I've got three kids and obviously
the youngest gets less than the oldest because I feel
bad about the fact that they're not going to be equal.
Speaker 2 (30:44):
That's okay. But sorry, did you just tell me that
As somebody who grew up in a domestic violence situation,
your mom escaped that. You're now investing for your children's future. Yeah,
it's funny.
Speaker 3 (30:55):
My stepdad said the same thing when I told him.
He was a bit like, oh, oh my God, are
you really? I was like, yes, I need like $ 10, but.
Speaker 2 (31:03):
Sorry, it's not just $ 10. It is not. It's the habit.
It's starting to contribute to their future in a way
that they are going to be able to talk to
you about. Like you didn't grow up with people surrounding
you going, hey, here's a budget. hey, here's money that's
been invested for you for your future. This is why
we invest. Investing is important because of A, B and C. Like, sorry,
(31:26):
you're telling me that's how your kids are going to
grow up? It's not actually about the dollars in the account,
my queen, like they are going to become adults and
they are going to be able to contribute to that themselves,
but they're going to know to do that from the get-go.
Imagine if you were 18 and someone had set you
up with this and you were like, no, that's just
how money works.
Speaker 4 (31:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (31:46):
We're very, that's one thing I think growing up struggling
with money, I guess we're very transparent in our household
of like, it's Sometimes, actually sometimes it's not a good
thing because every payday my kids will be like, hey,
it's your payday this week.
Speaker 2 (31:59):
Where's the dollars?
Speaker 3 (32:01):
They're thinking, is it our payday? I'm like, no, no,
that's my payday. But they're on top of it. They'll
be like, do we get any pocket money? Like, can
I do any chores? And I'm always like transparent in like,
if you want to talk money, then let's talk. This
is how much our current rent is. This is how
much this phone costs. Like, to let them at least
understand that just because we get paid doesn't mean suddenly
(32:24):
we're rich for the week.
Speaker 2 (32:25):
But that's so powerful. And I think so many times,
especially as women, we look at it and we go, oh,
I'm investing for my kids, but it's not much. And
it's honestly not about the amount that you're investing. In fact,
there have been times where I've done financial advice in
the past and told people, hey, you actually need to
(32:45):
stop contributing as much as you're contributing to your kids.
Because as much as we love them and we want
them to thrive, you cannot pour from an empty cup.
And it's actually going to be more financially beneficial for
you to contribute. financially look after yourself and create your
own really big emergency fund and create your own investment
portfolio and just teach them the habits and the consistency
(33:08):
so that they can be successful individually. And I think
that we just go, oh, because there's not thousands in there.
It's kind of not worth it. But that's not the
case at all. Like that's not why you listen to
the She's On The Money podcast. You don't listen to
the She's On The Money podcast because you immediately have thousands,
do you? It's about setting up the habits and creating
(33:28):
the life that you deserve from scratch.
Speaker 3 (33:30):
Yeah, definitely. And we now, obviously, only within the last
few months, we'll talk to them. If they get birthday
money and stuff, we'll automatically say, well, how much is
going in your investment? And they'll obviously be like, oh,
do I have to? Like, I really wanted to buy X,
Y and Z. And I'll be like, you need to
do 20%. Like, let's talk about it.
Speaker 2 (33:48):
Yeah, that's so cool.
Speaker 3 (33:50):
I am obsessed.
Speaker 2 (33:51):
They're going to be like, And you know what? Even
if 16-year-old you was sat down and told about compounding interest,
I think you would have been like, nah, that's not
for me because also I can go to the movies
because that would have been me. Tell me about debt.
You have just talked about purchasing some land and it's
(34:11):
not going to title till next year, but How much
have you purchased it for? What does that look like?
Speaker 3 (34:17):
Yeah, so we've definitely missed the boat on like nice
house and land opportunities. And we've made peace with that
because I really felt like we were being ripped off
of an opportunity. My, pretty much everybody I know bought
around like 2018, 2019, 2020, or we're building, sorry. And
(34:38):
they all did it for about 500K or less. For
the land and our build, we're looking at 870 and
we're getting like basically the same thing that everybody did
six years ago. So I get a little bit annoyed
by but I'm like, that's not anybody else's fault. Like
it's just the way it is.
Speaker 2 (34:58):
And it's also not their journey. So like, yes, you
can see what they have purchased their home for, but
you're the one that is putting investments in your kids' names.
You're the one that has an idea of what your
superannuation looks like. You've even been chat GPT-ing it and
looking at what that means for your future. Like just
because they got a cheaper house than you doesn't mean
(35:21):
that they are more financially secure than you will be
come retirement. I think that there's a misconception that everybody
who bought way back in 2018, 2019 is going to
be so much more financially secure. I mean, they could
be if they were investing, if they were looking at
their superannuation, if they had a good budget and cash
flow system, I'm sure they could be. But that's unfortunately
(35:43):
not the reality of it. a lot of people in
that position go, yeah, we got our house a bit
cheaper so we spend all the rest of the money
that other people have to spend on holidays and stuff.
Speaker 3 (35:52):
Yes, absolutely. And it's always the like shock reaction from
other people who are like, oh, you're paying that much?
And I'm like, that is like we are– actually trying
to not spend that much. That's just the reality of
what it costs, but it's their shock reaction that bothers me.
Speaker 2 (36:11):
Oh, totally. But that is just their experience being compared
to your experience and in a completely different economy. Like pre-COVID, sorry,
if I could go back in time and purchase pre-COVID,
my queen, I would. I just, I didn't have that
opportunity available to me. We ended up purchasing during COVID, which,
(36:33):
you know, financially was a good decision for us. But
There are so many things that if I could go
back in time, you know what I'd buy? So much cryptocurrency. Like,
can you imagine if I just put $ 100 into cryptocurrency
back in 2015? I'd be like rich, rich.
Speaker 3 (36:50):
Yeah, so true.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
But we've all got regrets. I think it's just so
important to always take other people's comments with a grain
of salt.
Speaker 1 (36:57):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (36:58):
Because you could be like, oh, my favorite color is blue.
And they go, ew, I like green. Like, so what's
that got to do with the price of fish? Because like, unfortunately,
their incomes won't be paying your mortgage. So if that's
the case, they don't get to actually have an opinion.
Speaker 3 (37:14):
Yeah, very true.
Speaker 2 (37:15):
So in the bin with them. So tell me, are
there any other costs that aren't included in that figure?
Speaker 3 (37:21):
That should be inclusive of everything that I can account for.
Speaker 2 (37:25):
Very cool. Do you have any other debts?
Speaker 3 (37:28):
Yeah, so we have... From, well, if I go back
12 months ago, we actually had five loans and we
are almost down to two.
Speaker 2 (37:37):
Stop it.
Speaker 3 (37:38):
Yeah. So that was part of the whole like reflection
of we're doing terrible. We need to fix this. Sorry.
Speaker 2 (37:46):
In 12 months, you've gone from five loans to two
and you've still been able to purchase a block of land,
get the pre-approval for that for like within the like
high six figure range.
Speaker 1 (37:58):
What?
Speaker 2 (37:59):
And you're thinking, oh, we're still doing so badly.
Speaker 3 (38:02):
Yeah, yeah, I guess, yeah. I'm always my worst critic.
Speaker 2 (38:06):
Oh, I can be my worst critic too, so line up.
Now tell me what are the two debts that remain
and what do they look like?
Speaker 3 (38:13):
So we've got one debt is the car loan. It's
got about 12K on it and it finishes in I
think about 14 months and the other one is about
12K again or maybe 13 and it finishes in 24 months.
It's a high interest, like one of those... loans you
(38:36):
apply online, you never meet anyone and they just go,
sounds good. The money will be in your account in
a few days. And I did it to get plastic surgery.
So that leads into my impulsiveness as well.
Speaker 2 (38:48):
Yeah. Okay. And when did you get that debt?
Speaker 4 (38:51):
2023.
Speaker 3 (38:51):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (38:53):
And is that something that you've spoken to your mortgage
broker about maybe rolling into a different personal loan? Because
if it's an online... high interest personal loan, and you've
been approved for a mortgage, I'm going to take a
stab in the dark and assume that a bank would
probably approve you for about $ 12, 000 in a personal loan
(39:14):
that maybe would incur less interest.
Speaker 3 (39:16):
I actually have never even considered it. I think because
I've historically been so impulsive and like, oh, there's $ 300
in my bank account, each pay left over. That means
I can get a new car that I just trying
to get rid of everything rather than like actually take
the time to be smart and go, let's reconsolidate it
(39:37):
or anything. I'm just kind of like, don't touch it
because I've already ruined so much.
Speaker 2 (39:42):
No, no, that's where I would get a little bit of, well,
obviously I would never give you financial advice, but... I
feel like that's something you should highlight to them and say, hey,
could you please look into options to refinance this to
a lower interest rate? And then you pay off the
same amount, which means you're not in a different situation.
(40:03):
You'd save some interest and then also probably pay it
off sooner while not having someone take advantage. Because I
feel like a lot of the time, those high interest loans,
they are taking advantage of you. It was so easy
to get because they were like, this is going to
be money in the bank for us.
Speaker 3 (40:19):
Absolutely. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (40:20):
And it just annoys me so much because like, I
don't care why you got the debt, but I care
how you pay off the debt and what that looks
like because you deserve better.
Speaker 3 (40:28):
Yeah. My fear of touching it definitely comes from the
fact that it's not like the first time I've had
a high interest crappy loan. It's like the eighth or
something like I've so often being like oh I need
money don't worry I'll get money by the end of
the night and then I would get the money I'm
very good at paying it back so I've never been
(40:49):
to the point where I have to owe them I've
always paid on time but I would always be like
if they'll give me the money I'll take.
Speaker 2 (40:57):
It yeah and that mentality makes so much sense but
I also now know enough about you that girlfriend Did
you think about going, and I'm not trying to shame you,
I promise, but did you think about going to just
one of the big four banks and getting a personal
loan instead? Or were you like, nah, it's too much paperwork?
Speaker 3 (41:12):
Honestly, it was more of I don't want to be
told no and not knowing better to have a proper
smart conversation. It was just like, who online? and they're
not dodgy but the business is in that they're like
you got money here you go so it was definitely
like a honestly it come from like a place of
shame as well like it's like something going through the
(41:35):
process I felt shame doing because I knew it was
so dumb but I was like this is how we
make ends meet and this is how I'll impulsively get x.
Speaker 2 (41:43):
Y and z totally and I I get the shame
thing because like I remember that was the situation I
was in. You've probably heard my story. I got myself
into more than $ 40, 000 worth of personal debt. And I'm
not saying that that was okay because it wasn't. But
like when I was paying that off, I remember Googling
(42:03):
like interest-free loans and, you know, like, loan consolidations and
stuff like that. And then not wanting to reach out
because I didn't want the person to be like, Oh
my God, that's such a dumb loan. How did you
do that? And then me having to tell them, Oh,
it wasn't even on anything good. Like my situation wasn't
such that I was trying to put food on the table.
(42:24):
Like mine was absolutely discretionary spending. And that made me
feel really guilty, but I didn't want to sit down
with someone and have them go, Oh, why'd you get
this loan? Like, I promise any good broker would never
ask like, and I want to know because I'm pervy,
like not because I'm judging you. Like you said, plastic surgery.
And I was immediately like, what'd you get done? Was
(42:45):
it good? Like that's where my brain went as opposed to, Oh,
I can't believe you do that. So get someone who's
on your team because it is costing you so much
more money to have that loan as opposed to one
that would might be a little bit of an uncomfortable
conversation at the start. But I promise like it wouldn't
be like it's our job.
Speaker 3 (43:05):
Yeah. Yeah. That's a good idea. I'm definitely going to
do that.
Speaker 2 (43:08):
So tell me a little bit more about personal insurances.
Is that something that you've ever looked into and set up?
Speaker 3 (43:15):
I started the process again because of what I've learned
through the podcast. And I booked a call. But I
didn't get the opportunity to answer it. And I just went, oh,
I'll have to call them back. And I haven't done
it yet. But I've only got my super insurance.
Speaker 2 (43:30):
And have you had a look at that? What does
that look like?
Speaker 3 (43:32):
I have looked at it. I think it's like $ 370, 000
for the total permanent disability or death. But it's the,
you have to wait the three months for your income insurance,
like all of them, I guess.
Speaker 2 (43:47):
Yeah, that's pretty standard. I would take a stab in
the dark and again, not advice, but given you've told
me you have three children, I don't think 300-ish grand
is going to be enough if something was to happen
to you. but that's why you have to pick up
the phone. And that's okay. But like you already said,
I need to get that in order and I'm working
on it. But to me, I'm always like, please make
(44:08):
sure that's okay because that's the thing that's going to
make sure that your kids get the life they deserve.
Speaker 3 (44:13):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (44:13):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (44:13):
It's definitely in the to-do basket. I just haven't got
back around to it.
Speaker 2 (44:18):
Totally. All right. Now tell me, what do you think
your best money habit is?
Speaker 3 (44:23):
I think it's taken time, but I've never followed a
financial trend. Like when everybody was getting $ 80 water bottles
or $ 150 work bags and everything like that, it was
never something that I cared for. I love a dupe.
And I... and definitely someone they'll be like, Oh, that's
really nice. Where'd you get it from? And I'll be like,
(44:44):
Oh my God, Amazon or Timu. Like I immediately will
be like, yeah, it's on Shein like, and show people
immediately how to use it to also find the same bargain.
Speaker 2 (44:53):
Oh, I love that. I mean, I don't love Timu
and Shein, so I'll just pretend I haven't heard that,
but I do love an Amazon moment. And I feel
like I'm a resourceful queen with like AliExpress. Like, if
something is for sale, like I found a baby monitor
the other day and I was like, I swear this
looks like an AliExpress thing. And I Googled it and
(45:15):
found the link and purchased it. And it is identical
to the like real version. Cost me like a hundred
dollars and you're a mom, so you'll get this, but
I got two cameras and one like monitor and of
what other people are paying like close to $ 500 for.
And when I started looking further into it, turns out
(45:38):
the quote legit company here in Australia is just drop
shipping the AliExpress one with their label on it.
Speaker 3 (45:44):
Yes, that is actually something I love to do. As
soon as I see something I want, I'll screenshot it
in Google image, reverse search, whatever it's called to find
it on the website first. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (45:55):
And it annoys me so much because I'm like, hold on.
So many people are being taken advantage of here because
that's not what happens. Like, don't get me wrong, happy
to pay for quality. If I look something up and
I'm like, oh, that's legit. Like you're not going to
get a Dyson hairdryer on AliExpress, you know?
Speaker 3 (46:12):
No. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (46:13):
But when I look at something and I go, hold on,
you aren't being fully transparent here. You have found something
on AliExpress and now you're wholesaling it and selling it
as your own. To me, that doesn't feel right.
Speaker 3 (46:26):
Yeah. My current, obviously with building a house, even though
it's not going to be ready for like over 12 months,
I'm looking at furniture. And so I'm doing a lot
of screenshotting of the furniture and finding the exact same item.
It's the exact same image that they use as well
and seeing the markup.
Speaker 2 (46:45):
Isn't it crazy? One of my friends actually purchased a
whole heap of furniture and on AliExpress through a wholesaler
and it came a couple of months ago, it is phenomenal.
I mean, you obviously have to approach all of those
things with caution because obviously some things are definitely not
what they seem. but she did all the research. She
had all of these reviews. She'd been talking to this
(47:07):
person for ages, then did a bulk order. And I
think it cost her like $ 5, 000, which is a lot
of money, but she got like $ 30, 000 worth of furniture.
Speaker 3 (47:17):
Yes. Yeah. Love that.
Speaker 2 (47:19):
Crazy. Let's flip the narrative though. What's your worst money habit?
Speaker 3 (47:24):
I think my worst money habit would be that I'm
still very impulsive. So although I can easily bypass whatever's trending,
if there's something else that I've determined I need that,
I can't actually not think about it. So for example,
with moving and building, even though it is a fair
while away, I can't stop thinking about it. And I'll
(47:45):
go and like lay by towels for the new house
that doesn't even exist yet. It's still a patch of dirt.
Speaker 2 (47:50):
But that's exciting.
Speaker 3 (47:52):
And I mean.
Speaker 2 (47:53):
If you make a big spreadsheet of everything that you're
purchasing and need to purchase, like we might be getting
a really good deal, but the impulsive side of it,
probably not ideal.
Speaker 4 (48:03):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (48:03):
It's the impulsiveness and the need to do it straight away.
Speaker 2 (48:06):
Yeah. Is there something that you've been trying to implement
to combat that? Like, have you been like, look, I've
been really trying or are you like, nah, just still
buy the towels?
Speaker 3 (48:15):
A bit of both. I have actually, funny, I did
make a spreadsheet of everything that I looked at and
would like, and I've kind of gone, what am I
looking at that I can't stop thinking about? And I've
kind of highlighted those to be like, okay, well, let's
just get those by the end of the year. And
the other part, I won't even look at it. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (48:34):
So fair. So fair.
Speaker 3 (48:35):
Try and take it off my mind.
Speaker 4 (48:37):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (48:37):
No, I get that. All right. I want to reflect
on everything you've just told me. Like we started your
money story and it started with, I'm a first nations
woman who grew up in a family violence situation. your mom,
your brother, and you got out of that situation, started
from scratch, you're now earning 150 grand plus. like you've
(48:59):
got these epic money goals. You've just like purchased a
block of land. You're investing for your kids. You're smashing
down your debt. Like you've already made the call to
get personal insurances.
Speaker 3 (49:09):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (49:09):
You sound a little bit like me and that we
sometimes need to pick up our phone when it calls,
but like, that's not the worst thing ever. But you
gave this person that we just had a really beautiful
conversation about a C minus. Do you feel like that's reflective?
Speaker 3 (49:23):
Maybe a B minus. I am a really harsh person.
I think as well, I'm very all or nothing. And
because I'm still so early in flipping around these habits,
I feel like I'm in the midst of it. I'm
right in the guts of it all. I'm not on
the other end yet to sit back and reflect and
be like super proud. But I also have to realize
(49:44):
it's a never ending journey. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (49:45):
I was about to say, well, when's that? Like, when
do we actually sit down? Like, do we sit down?
Is it when you're in your house and I come
over for a cup of tea and you say, Victoria,
I've made it? Because I can almost guarantee you go, yep,
now we are trying to make sure that we cash
flow these mortgage repayments for the next 30 years. And
then I go, okay, cool. Do I come back in
30 years? And you go, yeah, but then also we
(50:07):
need to talk about our super. Like, I think we
need to learn to enjoy the journey because my queen,
your journey has been nothing short of epic. Like, are
you kidding? Now you're like investing for your kids and
you've bought your dream property. And I know analysis, paralysis
and comparison culture is killing you at the moment, but
like run your own race. You're doing really well.
Speaker 3 (50:27):
Yeah. I think I definitely need to slow down and
appreciate where I've come from.
Speaker 2 (50:33):
A hundred percent. Like if I had started in the
same position as you and had achieved exactly what you
had achieved, I would be insanely proud of myself. But
it sounds like especially like just reflecting on the conversation
we've just had where you said, oh yeah, heap of
our friends purchased in 2018, 2019. I reckon if I
lined up those friends, they have a number of privileges
(50:54):
you didn't have.
Speaker 3 (50:55):
Yeah, definitely.
Speaker 2 (50:56):
Yet you've still achieved exactly what they achieved. Like that
is out of this world cool. Like I just, I'm
so excited because I know what that means, but I
don't think you see how cool you are yet. Oh, thanks.
And that's okay. That's my job. I'm going to keep
working on that money, Doris. I wish we had more
time to hang out today. It has been an absolute pleasure.
(51:16):
Thank you for sharing your journey and having a really
open and candid conversation with us. I just, I hope
we get to keep in touch and I hope that
we get to cross paths in person at some point.
Speaker 3 (51:26):
Thank you. Thank you so much for having me.
Speaker 4 (51:33):
The advice shared on She's on the Money is general
in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's
on the Money exists purely for educational purposes and should
not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision.
Speaker 2 (51:46):
If you do choose to buy a financial product, read the.
Speaker 4 (51:49):
PDS, TMD and obtain appropriate financial.
Speaker 2 (51:52):
Advice tailored towards your needs.
Speaker 4 (51:54):
Victoria Devine and She's On The Money are authorised representatives
of MoneySherpa PTY LTD ABN 321 649 27708 AFSL 451 289.
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