FULL: Does Your Mum Know You're Sharing That On National Radio

Big Friday Energy on The Christian O’Connell Show. Starting with Double Thumbs and Bright Side of the Weekend, Rio gambles on Aus Post delivering his mum’s beach chair in time for Mother’s Day, Christian accidentally hides Sarah’s gift in a bin bag, and Patsy delivers a heartfelt shout out to her mum for Mother's Day.

Then it’s Caught With Your Pants Down - Part Two before crowning Australia’s Funniest Mum during a live stand up comedy show!

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:09):
iHeart podcasts.

Speaker 2 (00:10):
You can hear more Gold one I four point three podcasts,
playlist and listen live on the free iHeart app.

Speaker 3 (00:18):
Got anything Good?

Speaker 4 (00:19):
Hey?

Speaker 5 (00:20):
This is the Christian O'Connell show podcast.

Speaker 2 (00:24):
Hey this is Christian here. Thank you very much for
checking out today's show. Now, if you listen to our show,
you're already one of us. But why don't we take
it a step further? I invite you to join our
exclusive bright Siders Platinum Club. I'll started calling the show
the bright side of the Dial. It's our way of
letting you know what are shows about, what we stand for,

(00:44):
And the bright side is Platinum Club is our very
own inner circle. So come and join us. What do
you get when you join the bright Side is Platinum Club.
You get your own membership card. You can also get
access to our private inner circle. It's a private Facebook group.

Speaker 6 (00:58):
In there. Our first alerts early ideas.

Speaker 2 (01:01):
Before they become anything on the show, which means you
can outshape the show and also say no before something
becomes a bad idea on the show. You get the
time wasters the day before when Rie and I come
up with the ideas of the time wasters, you'll hear
them before anybody else. Also, every Friday, dropping into your
inbox a unique private message from me to all the

(01:22):
bright Siders, only the bright Siders, not for on air.
So if you want to join us, the only thing
I need you to do is text the word bright
Siders to oh four seven five O three one oh
four three.

Speaker 6 (01:34):
I look forward to seeing you in there. And now
enjoy today's show.

Speaker 5 (01:38):
A Christian O'Connell show podcast.

Speaker 2 (01:41):
Welcome to the Christian O'Connell Show. We call us Double
thumbs Up. We go around the team, we talk about
the things we're into the moment. Might be a book,
it might be a TV show or a movie. Anythink
and you can share what you're enjoying at the moment
as well. Text me your recommendations for Double thumbs Up.
Four seven five three one oh four three. Patsy, what's
it for you? What are you enjoying?

Speaker 7 (02:00):
Went and saw Devil Wears prior to too Now I
have to preface this with saying when I came out,
I wasn't that impressed.

Speaker 8 (02:07):
I thought, well, that's not quite as good.

Speaker 7 (02:09):
As the first one, and I thought, if anything, I've
had lovely little two hours with my fourteen year old.

Speaker 8 (02:14):
We went and saw it together.

Speaker 7 (02:15):
Yes, as I have processed it across the last five
or six days, I like it more and it's like, no, no, no,
you missed the point. It is so much deeper. It's
a beautiful script. It is glossy, not as glossy as
the first. It's beautiful. It's picturesque. Part of it's shot
in Italy and the lovely Galleria with all the fashion

(02:35):
stores and everything.

Speaker 8 (02:36):
Yes, that's nice. It's got the original cast, of course,
with the addition of Patrick Bramor, I know, incredible, who
is indible. He's so natural on screen.

Speaker 6 (02:45):
Big American. Oh yeah, such a talent today.

Speaker 8 (02:47):
And I love now you can be an Aussie on screen.

Speaker 7 (02:50):
He didn't have to be an American and he's an
Australian builder essentially.

Speaker 8 (02:55):
So it was beautiful.

Speaker 7 (02:57):
Miranda is so much more mellow now than she was
in the first.

Speaker 8 (03:00):
It's twelve.

Speaker 6 (03:00):
I've never seen the first one.

Speaker 2 (03:03):
I'm watching it this weekend right with my daughters, and
then we're all going to go and see the second
one next week. Really, i've never seen it. It's so good,
it's very Yeah, watching it this weekend.

Speaker 1 (03:14):
I can't wait.

Speaker 6 (03:14):
It's like a Mother's Day thing. We're going to do it.

Speaker 2 (03:16):
My wife were all Saturday night, We're all sitting down
and watching it together. I've never seen it, so any
talk about Miranda is that Anne Hathaway.

Speaker 8 (03:22):
No, no, no, that's Meryl Street.

Speaker 6 (03:24):
Women right now are all not in their head? Go
come on, there is this guy.

Speaker 7 (03:28):
Yes, so she plays like the Aenna wind Tour character
and quite ruthless in the first one. But you know,
the media landscapes changed and the Runway magazine has had
to make cutbacks and she has to hang up around.

Speaker 2 (03:39):
Great Stanny Tucci is in as well, who I love.
I was watching the interviews with the cast, and you
know he directed a lot of it, did he really?
And they said the way he works At four o'clock
it stops and he has a mini cocktail maker on
him and he starts making everyone Minnie Martinis.

Speaker 6 (03:56):
What It was a classy a is he? So you
recommend it?

Speaker 9 (04:01):
I do.

Speaker 8 (04:02):
It's beautiful.

Speaker 7 (04:03):
It speaks to women in their fifties who are aging
in the workforce, and it also speaks two mothers who
make sacrifices, professional women, any working woman who make sacrifices
being a mum.

Speaker 8 (04:14):
It's lovely. You'll love it.

Speaker 6 (04:16):
Great, can't wait. Well, I'm going to draw the first
one first of all.

Speaker 5 (04:18):
This weekend the Christian O'Connell Show podcast.

Speaker 2 (04:23):
We're doing double thumbs up. We go around the team
and give you our recommendations. Rio, what have you enjoyed
this week?

Speaker 1 (04:29):
Guys? It is a big day today, the big Guy's birthday, mister,
I should say, Sir David Attenborough's one hundredth birthday today.

Speaker 2 (04:38):
How many generations have been inspired to the wander around us,
in the natural world above us, around us and beneath
us as well.

Speaker 6 (04:46):
Well.

Speaker 1 (04:46):
There's some stat that he's the only person to have
won a Bafta in the black and white color and
four k.

Speaker 2 (04:53):
Era, one of the few people to have a double
night as well. He's actually got his two sirs. It
really should be Sir, Sir David Attenborough.

Speaker 1 (05:01):
How does that work?

Speaker 6 (05:02):
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (05:02):
He got one of the eighties and he got on
the last eight years. He's got two different forms of knighthood.

Speaker 8 (05:07):
One was feel like animals and preservation.

Speaker 6 (05:10):
They all got together. The apes bloody love him, you know.

Speaker 8 (05:14):
The environment I think was for the second one.

Speaker 2 (05:16):
Yeah, that man is done so much and just beautiful,
beautiful shows.

Speaker 6 (05:21):
So there's a new one, isn't there.

Speaker 1 (05:22):
There's a new one. It's called a Gorilla Story, and
it's beautiful. So he goes back. There's an iconic Atenbraugh
moment back in the seventies where he goes into the
Rwandan jungle and he's just sort of creeping up near
these gorillas.

Speaker 2 (05:34):
And then massive there's silver backs as well. It's an
incredible moment of natural reporting as well.

Speaker 6 (05:40):
He's very brave. They're huge, yeah.

Speaker 1 (05:42):
Two hundred and fifty keels. And one of the little
one comes over and starts sort of playing with him,
and he starts playing with it back well, very gently,
and then the big mama comes behind him and puts
her hand on his head and they have this moment.
And he still is so good at his job that
he has the wherewithal to be able to look to
the camera and commentate it and say these really profound things.

Speaker 2 (06:04):
He's lying there, one of them's messing with his hand,
one of them start to under his shoelaceers like five
or six, and watching it's been blown away by what
the time was so edgy as still as now, if
you saw a reporter doing that now it's baking. Now
it's so drone shots. It's made a lot cheaper. They
don't get actual humans on location. Now there's cheap boay
to do it. But he was out there, which brought
it somehow closer to your front rooms around the world.

Speaker 1 (06:27):
Yeah, and it makes you feel so differently about animals
and nature and you see them as these you know,
sentient beings. And he goes back, well, he doesn't technically
go back. They go back to the Rwandan jungle to
see what that the Pablo family, which is the gorillas,
and what's happened to them. And interestingly, the numbers are
still going quite well. But they've got like this gang

(06:48):
warfare going on between these two big honchos Ibuzu and Jirakuzi,
and they've got this sort of godfather esque sort of
turf war going on. It's fascinating.

Speaker 6 (06:58):
Yeah, it's amazing.

Speaker 2 (07:00):
One of the most interesting and enjoyble people I've had
had a pleasure of interviewing as well, and an owl
with him. What a funny, funny, charismatic, twinkly eyed guy
as well.

Speaker 6 (07:09):
So many incredible stories as well. He's lived such.

Speaker 1 (07:12):
An extraordinary life and the thing is.

Speaker 2 (07:14):
Now, what's sad is if you watched the last couple
of years because of the mess we've made of this
natural planet. Just when you hear him to our it
feels like he's telling us all off, and he should be.

Speaker 1 (07:22):
Yeah, yes, every single I remember the in Oceans He's
last one as well, this really moving monologue about that
big waves crashing.

Speaker 2 (07:29):
Yes, yes, we should play some of it in some
of his classic bits as well. If you've got a
favorite moment of Sir Sir David Attenbroough, you want to
hear it on the show today, text me we can
play them four seven five three, one oh four three.
And I've got two TV shows for you that I
highly recommend as well. That's coming out.

Speaker 5 (07:44):
Next Christian Connell Show podcast.

Speaker 2 (07:48):
We call this double thumbs up for me. Then two
quick TV shows. Finished watching Big Mistakes. I was raving
about this last week, Dan Levy's show on Netflix. Obviously
it's Dad Eugene Big Star and they're when Shit's Creaked Together.
It's his own show, absolutely brilliant half hour episodes. Loved
it really great. I didn't see that coming cliffhangers at
that at the end as well. I really really enjoyed

(08:11):
it really funny. And then the other one. I think
at the end of the year when they're talking about
best TV shows of the year, this will go down
as the most original TV show of twenty twenty six.
It's the big new show on Apple TV called Widows Bay.
Styles are brilliant. Matthew Reese, if you ever saw the Americans,
great actor. It's got vibes of like Twin Peaks. So
it's a kind of not horror. I don't like horror,

(08:33):
but more mystery sort of vibes to it, mixed with
Parks and Rex.

Speaker 6 (08:38):
He says, mayor of.

Speaker 2 (08:39):
A small line and there's something odd going on. Yeah,
it's so good. It's five out of five for meat.
My family on the Vergion to stop watching because they
keep getting scared by the jump scares. But it's very
smartly done, like Hitscott where it's just off camera. It's
not too much, it's not too vivid, right. We don't
want anything too fun on right now the way the

(09:00):
world is. You want something mild mildly scary. But I
cannot recommend enough. That's called Widows Bay. It's brilliant. That's
on Apple.

Speaker 5 (09:09):
Christian O'Connell show on podcast.

Speaker 2 (09:13):
Thank you very much for sharing your double thumbs up recommendations. Christian,
I've been enjoying your Friends and Neighbors. Great storyline with
John Ham. Check it out. That's on Paul to start
the second season of that. I love John how that's
very good. Catherine's enjoying High Potential, which is on Disney.
Really easy watch quirky crime.

Speaker 1 (09:35):
Christian.

Speaker 2 (09:36):
We went to see the play at the Comedy Theater.
Brilliant script delivered brilliantly in New York. James Corden is
in that play with Bobby Cannavari.

Speaker 6 (09:45):
You know he's made of rolls Berg.

Speaker 2 (09:47):
Yeah, who's a brilliant He's a brilliant, brilliant actor.

Speaker 6 (09:50):
Christian.

Speaker 2 (09:50):
We're really enjoying Person of Interest on Netflix. Highly recommended.
That's from Tracy. All right, this find out about what
you're doing over the weekend. Mother's Day Sunday. Did you
order the beach chair for your Mamrio yesterday?

Speaker 1 (10:03):
Yes, I have just in time. I think Thursday or
late Thursday morning.

Speaker 2 (10:07):
Oh, no way, there's.

Speaker 1 (10:10):
No real deliveries on Sunday anyway. I think they do
now post they do some express deliveries. On the weekend.
They have never seen it.

Speaker 6 (10:19):
You're saying that to try and sleep.

Speaker 2 (10:21):
Well, your mom's getting that Wednesday, Thursday, slack as.

Speaker 1 (10:26):
Sun no Sunday afternoon.

Speaker 2 (10:27):
She'll be in that beautiful this is the weather to
in some cheap discounted chair. My son got me. Just
you wait, wow, and actually is it for fishing.

Speaker 1 (10:38):
It's for fishing. Yeah, Mouma's had a very keen fisherman,
so they'll be popping down even in the winter. They'll
go out, so they'll pop down, pull in some brims,
some widening. Where do they go? Butany bay they do?
They living in Rockdale, so they pop down your botany
bay out the front. She got to love that chair
all the way down. Well, that's why she wants to like,
that's why she wants a special lightweight one back one

(11:00):
point three kilos yet.

Speaker 2 (11:02):
Right, Okay, I've never seen a lot of fishermen in
their beach chairs.

Speaker 1 (11:06):
These are elderly fishing people.

Speaker 2 (11:08):
Let the fish come to the exactly exactly how do
they get them out in the bee's chair.

Speaker 1 (11:12):
They leave snacks around the chair with their feet of
the chair. They've got these little fishing rod holders, so
they castle line out, They put the rod into the
sink and wait, and then they just let the fish
come to them. Fantastic, I said, FREDA is finally here
done to hang out with your friends. You've made it

(11:36):
through the week to the brad side of the weekend.

Speaker 2 (11:40):
All right, what are you up to this weekend? What
is the right side for your weekend? What are you
looking forward to?

Speaker 6 (11:44):
Text me?

Speaker 2 (11:45):
Oh for seventy five three one o four three. You
can call the show this morning thirteen fifty five, twenty two.
It's all about Mother's Day. I'm cooking a big lunch
for my two daughters and my wife as we celebrate
the divine feminine.

Speaker 6 (12:01):
It didn't go this morning.

Speaker 2 (12:02):
Suddenly, at two m I realized to hide the gift
that I've got for my own wife for Mother's Day.

Speaker 1 (12:08):
Put it in a bin bang.

Speaker 2 (12:09):
Like I said earlier during the week on the show,
I put the bins out, so I thought, she's never
going to go rummaging in a bin bag.

Speaker 6 (12:15):
It's safe in there.

Speaker 2 (12:17):
However, to make it look not like a gift in
a package, which is what it is, in a box,
I just put a load of other stuff in there
around it to make it look like a genuine bin bang.

Speaker 1 (12:27):
My wife lost it in the bin. No, yeah, I said,
the wheely bin after midnight or before.

Speaker 2 (12:33):
No, no, no, so after luckily so suddenly I was
panicking yesterday evening and I was like, it was a
bin bank just you yeah, so you hadn't put it
out of throwing it in the bin and went bin
just a bin bang.

Speaker 6 (12:47):
And then she was like, why are you Why are
you shifty? She's like, you haven't put my gift in there?

Speaker 1 (12:52):
I went, yes, hidden in there? How you go and
retrieve it from the bit. That's not a good look.
It's a terrible off. Why would you be surprised if
someone would put a bin bag in the bin in
my family? Do you know what?

Speaker 2 (13:04):
Almost twenty years of marriage, that's the first time it's happened,
The first time ever happened.

Speaker 6 (13:09):
What are the odds? It's still one with your Mother's
Day gift?

Speaker 1 (13:12):
And what are you cooking? We are?

Speaker 2 (13:15):
I'm doing chicken, meatballs, a macaroni and cheese that I
made the night before, and then warm up. It's a
Neil Perry recipe I've done many many times. Oh my god,
it's so good, it's fantastic, So you were having that.
What are you doing with Alady? What are they doing
for Mother's Day? Few pats.

Speaker 8 (13:33):
We're going out for lunch apparently somewhere, which I'm really
looking forward to.

Speaker 7 (13:37):
But it's all very secret and they're very mysterious, but.

Speaker 8 (13:41):
It'll be nice.

Speaker 7 (13:42):
You know what I missed, though, Christian, about Mother's Day
is when they're little and they come home from Krash
with all the homemade you know, the macaroni necklaces.

Speaker 6 (13:49):
Of pasta food.

Speaker 1 (13:50):
You've missed all.

Speaker 7 (13:51):
That you know, and all that you know, make you
a bit of woodwork that just you can't make out
exactly what it is, but I've put you know, all
that stuff is still.

Speaker 8 (13:59):
Up in my kitchen that she made at kras. I
missed those days. I just like it, you know.

Speaker 2 (14:03):
Just made cards are the best best, just seeing.

Speaker 6 (14:07):
Their little hand ing.

Speaker 2 (14:08):
Even my daughter's at nineteen and twenty one, they still
write out their notes and they can't stay They mean
the most as the handwriting. Yeah, these days in a
world of like everything's texted and stuff like that, handwriting's
rare and rare that you see, isn't it.

Speaker 1 (14:20):
I can't get sore as soon as I do, like
free life, real workout, isn't it what I've told you?

Speaker 2 (14:24):
Whenever I get a birthday card, I get two exactly
the same in case I will screw up on the
first draft.

Speaker 1 (14:30):
Yes, yeah, yeah, just spell it wrong and I'm like,
god damn, there's no auto correct on these plans.

Speaker 2 (14:34):
I forgot, can't undo writing, there's no under writing.

Speaker 6 (14:38):
Alex. You've got a big weekend for your wife, Bonnie.

Speaker 1 (14:41):
I've got the double.

Speaker 10 (14:42):
I've got Bonnie's fortieth birthday on Saturday and then Mother's
Day on Sunday.

Speaker 6 (14:47):
I've been a busy, busy boy. Oh my word, everything ready, lockdown. Well,
I'm organized for once. So I've got a big family lunch.

Speaker 1 (14:54):
Why say that? Now you've really it?

Speaker 6 (14:59):
Man, it's going to fastwight to Monday show. It all
went t It's up.

Speaker 1 (15:03):
I've got I hope not.

Speaker 9 (15:04):
So.

Speaker 10 (15:04):
I've got a couple of close friends from Sydney coming
down as well as family.

Speaker 1 (15:08):
Got a lunch on Saturday, and then we're.

Speaker 10 (15:10):
Going to the local pub in Melbourne for our Melbourne
friends and we're going to kick on and then Sunday,
of course, got that sounds.

Speaker 2 (15:17):
Like Sunday there's going to be a hangover which is
right for Bonnie, Okay, it's her weekend, she's not. But
for you my friend suddenly getting mother with a stinking hangover,
and then you got young kids.

Speaker 1 (15:29):
It's the worst. It's the worst thing.

Speaker 2 (15:31):
And it's like one minute feels like it takes like
ten hours to go by. Yes, this is going to
be a long, long day, no matter how much barocca
or hydrolata or whatever you want to take the night before.
Can't take that night back, No way, don't do the crime.
If you're not going to do the time, that's say,
you'll get the sweats and everything or brutal weekend for you.

Speaker 5 (15:52):
Tough Sunday, The Christian O'Connell Show podcast.

Speaker 2 (15:57):
I went to go and visit my nineteen year old daughter, Lois,
who's midway through her second year at university, so she
lives in Halls of Residence Rio.

Speaker 6 (16:07):
You probably went through this thing.

Speaker 2 (16:08):
I went to visit her new room and situation there
before taking up for lunch. Within a minute, I smelled
the unmistakable smell of vomit from the night before.

Speaker 1 (16:20):
It could have been that honestly, could have been six
months worth of vomit.

Speaker 2 (16:25):
Was the smelling there just the smell, the smell of
teenage fugness, laundry that's not been.

Speaker 6 (16:35):
Done, cask wine, cask wine, goon bags.

Speaker 2 (16:39):
Yeah, I saw too, as we're chatting to her and
she was trying to pretend to be a model student.
I went those three empty goom bags under the bed, says.
I hoped I'd kicked them far enough, and I went games,
he's going, my friend eighteen leaders. I took them out
there to get rid of them before and as I
was leaving with three empty gooon bags and a lot
I've been drinking with my daughter in.

Speaker 6 (16:57):
There in the middle of the day.

Speaker 2 (17:00):
I'm just seen that and the smell of it in there,
and just it is is no other smell like you.

Speaker 1 (17:06):
No, it's hard to describe it.

Speaker 2 (17:07):
It's a mixture of chunder and cabbage, you know, like
when you go around see Nanny Grandad. It's a distinctive smell.
Is it's always a boiled cabbage or something.

Speaker 1 (17:18):
Yes, yeah, there's something's running in there. You're not exactly
sure what there's mold on.

Speaker 2 (17:22):
Now I can because I look in the shared kimmione
of fridge right and just stuff to start to come out.
How many people, how many small humans share this fridge. Oh,
there's about twenty to thirty of us one fridge.

Speaker 1 (17:32):
Does it meant for twenty to thirty humans? Especially people
that aren't really house trained, that haven't lived in a
share house, that have gone straight from home into UNI.
You don't have those skills yet.

Speaker 2 (17:43):
And if there's like a bed, that couldn't help myself, Guys,
I start to go through the fridge looking at the
best before dates. Ninety percent of it was from last year.

Speaker 1 (17:54):
I was smelling milk, and she went, can you not
do this? It's just weird.

Speaker 2 (17:57):
It's awkward when this is dangerous for your friends, it's weird.
There's nothing weird or awkward about trying to keep these
people alive, these young brains.

Speaker 1 (18:05):
The world needs young brains, not a lot of fruit
and vegime.

Speaker 6 (18:08):
No fruit vegine then, no whatsoever?

Speaker 1 (18:12):
Christian?

Speaker 2 (18:13):
How do you talking about how you always buy two
versions of the same cards if you make a mistake
when you're doing your handwriting. There is a pen that
can be rubbed out, called a fris and pen at
office works. I got one of these ones. It looks
like it's been rubbed out, and as a kid, you
get those spy pens. Yes, yeah, the invisibly you can
clearly see. It's even worse. No one is using that

(18:35):
frick and pen. That's on Natasha Christian. I just heard
you saying that you've got your wife something for Mother's Day?
Do you always do that?

Speaker 6 (18:43):
Yes?

Speaker 2 (18:44):
I've got an eighteen year old and a twenty two
year old, so similar kind of ages to your kids.

Speaker 6 (18:48):
I didn't.

Speaker 2 (18:49):
I was expected to give my wife a Mother's Day gift.
The kids are getting us something? Am I meant to
get us something? Shannon from Engadeen We picked up two
listeners this week in Ingadeen. There's Shannon, and of course
there's James, who told me about the Scomo fake story.

Speaker 1 (19:04):
Ah, yes, the incident.

Speaker 2 (19:06):
Shannon's actually putting brackets it the place where you found
that sky my shack pants.

Speaker 6 (19:09):
He didn't do that.

Speaker 2 (19:13):
I don't think he's suing the show for that story.
It's been out there for a very very, very very
long time.

Speaker 1 (19:19):
Yeah. I does Chris get you a gift for Mother's Day?

Speaker 7 (19:22):
Well sort of, it's like a combined gift, you know,
it's like from him and.

Speaker 6 (19:28):
He can't claw onto a gift from his own.

Speaker 8 (19:30):
He does where there's gloring, he will be clawing.

Speaker 4 (19:33):
No.

Speaker 2 (19:34):
I always think you should get you should get your
wife and their mum on Mother's Day a gift as
we won't say thank you being such an awesome name.

Speaker 8 (19:40):
That's nice, nice, Well, yeah, she's going to take the
day now.

Speaker 1 (19:45):
You sort of throw Chris under the bus.

Speaker 2 (19:47):
Well, Apparently you can get a beach chair delivered at
the drones can fly around within an hour.

Speaker 5 (19:53):
In Rio's World, The Christian O'Connell Show podcast.

Speaker 2 (19:58):
As we're getting ready for the World Cup next month.
It is the World Cup. After a string of two
World Cups without a Shakira anthem, world peace will be
restored next week. It's incredible. Right now, on the fifteenth
of May, it's finally released. Shakira is back. Where has
she been?

Speaker 1 (20:16):
Wherever?

Speaker 2 (20:16):
String of two Sadly no one comes without Shakira anthem.
She's back with a brand new anthem. Dear Dear drops
fifteenth of May, Oh, kind of just be fifteenth of May.

Speaker 1 (20:27):
Already we get the first play in the world. I
know you would think it would go to a South
American Latin nation.

Speaker 2 (20:34):
No, no, no, I know you know it. Should she get
in there beforehand? I know no an exclusive. Cannot wait. Guys,
get ready for the fifteenth of May is dere dere
day on this show. It's incredible wait seeing guest the video.

Speaker 1 (20:51):
Imagine it's her dancing in a soccer field.

Speaker 2 (20:55):
You got it at the Macarena stadium.

Speaker 6 (20:59):
Is her actual name?

Speaker 11 (21:00):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (21:00):
Incredible is huge?

Speaker 6 (21:02):
Incredible, Yeah, yeah, I cannot wait.

Speaker 2 (21:03):
All right. So yesterday on the show, we were looking
for your stories of God with your pants down. We
had some incredible stories. So this one from Dominic. Get ready.
He begins with the phrase bum crack.

Speaker 12 (21:18):
I had an operation in my bum crack. I had
a scoop cut out and daily a nurse had to
come in and pack this hole in my bum crack.
So the process was rollover and put your bum up
in the air. She says to me, can you reach
around with your hands, spread your bum cheeks for me.
It all happened. She paded me on the headshet it's
all gone. Last I rolled over and it was visiting

(21:40):
hours at the hospital. The curtains of.

Speaker 2 (21:42):
Think poor guy. It was the pat on the head.
It's a lovely touch that nurse knows. Not for me,
hell of a lot for this guy.

Speaker 6 (21:52):
Hats on my head.

Speaker 1 (21:53):
I heard the word bum crack about eight times, and
also just him.

Speaker 2 (21:58):
Having to flip over and then flip over again when
he saw the bit like a rotistery Tim and Chicken.
It all began this week with Janine. It all starts
with a Jeanine. A power glitch happened when I was
in an automated toilet. When I pushed the toilet paper button,
the door opened.

Speaker 6 (22:12):
Those things.

Speaker 1 (22:13):
I don't trust.

Speaker 6 (22:14):
Things in life you can't trust.

Speaker 2 (22:15):
Yeah, those automated space age toilets, they don't work. Whenever
I've seen one, there's always a confused elderly person trying
to press a button and the door just keeps open.
They get irritated with you. Now, is it my fault?

Speaker 1 (22:27):
It's the machinery.

Speaker 2 (22:28):
Technology is coming between us. Yes, Christian. I was caught
with my pants down. Then we had head and story.
My now husband and I went camping. There was no
one around. It's beautiful. I need to answer the call
of nature. My husband said, just go down by the
river so no one could see me. I jumped down
and dropped my pants, squatting there. Suddenly I heard, to
my horror quiet part part of a motor boat. I

(22:51):
looked up to see two old men on board. I
couldn't stop. You're in the point of no return. We
all know that point. There's no going back.

Speaker 1 (22:59):
When you gotta go, you gotta go.

Speaker 6 (23:00):
There's only one way or Christian.

Speaker 2 (23:03):
I just had to put my head down and hope
that I would never ever see them again.

Speaker 6 (23:07):
You know that they were at that site.

Speaker 2 (23:09):
They're probably the only people that weekend was Helen and
they had now husband and the two old old dudes
on the boat as well.

Speaker 5 (23:16):
Christian Connell show podcast Your Stories.

Speaker 2 (23:20):
I think everyone's got one. Being caught with your pants down, Christian.
I'm a young man with kids. This happens all the time.
I have anxiety. Every time I need to use a
public toilet, I have to take my toddlers in the
cubicle with me. Of course, you know what it's like.
They go first, then it's my turn. They think it's
hilarious though we we're all in there together to unlock
the door and fling it open Christian whilst I'm mid stream.

(23:44):
Of course, they think that's funny because of you crying
and the fear of it. They go, this is the
funniest game ever. They think it's probably just a game
you play, And.

Speaker 1 (23:51):
The more you tell them not to do it, the
more they're going to want.

Speaker 6 (23:53):
To do the giga.

Speaker 2 (23:55):
While doing it, they think they're hilarious. I whisper bribes
at them. We need love to be the other side
of that, just to hear. What are those brides? Thank
you very much, Claire. Funny story, Christian, I remember a
being caught with the pants down story. I used to
work shaving horses coats off. That's an odd job.

Speaker 1 (24:17):
Is there a name for that?

Speaker 2 (24:18):
Is there is? Is there enough work in that to
make it a job? How many are you doing? A
date and goat twelve horses?

Speaker 8 (24:25):
I didn't think you had to trim a.

Speaker 2 (24:26):
Horse during the summer. They have to have less hair
because it get so hot. Obviously someone has to come
around and cheer the horses. Yeah, maybe Monday we go
odd jobs. I had a job once for a summer,
like for twelve weeks painting painting forklift trucks.

Speaker 1 (24:46):
Wow, like like doing artwork on them?

Speaker 6 (24:49):
No, just repainting them. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (24:52):
It was this company that was a real cheap ass
company won those cashing the hand jobs and a student
just desperate for work and so they were getting these
second and forkliffs and just rather than spray painted to
do it up, getting some gormlous student me to paint
them by hat ages.

Speaker 1 (25:09):
You ever seen the size of fall truck you.

Speaker 2 (25:10):
Got put the old that the like, the forks are
paint underneath their paint the whole thing.

Speaker 1 (25:17):
Why are you bothering painting the forks?

Speaker 6 (25:19):
Oh? Everything?

Speaker 2 (25:19):
Because people come around. If you want to buy a
folk of truck, you're going to go. Can you raise
the forks?

Speaker 6 (25:24):
Hey? Listen if you know you know, I'm.

Speaker 2 (25:26):
A people in factories all run Australia laughing right now
at old Sicky, a city slicker.

Speaker 1 (25:30):
Rio doesn't know.

Speaker 6 (25:32):
About four gone fork golf.

Speaker 1 (25:33):
That was the funny joke every.

Speaker 6 (25:34):
Day in the factory, Christian.

Speaker 2 (25:37):
I got caught with my pants down yesterday and to
use a public tool in the shopping center. When I
walked in, it said in a mechanical voice, you have
ten minutes.

Speaker 1 (25:46):
Oh, I didn't know there was a timer. That's crazy.

Speaker 6 (25:51):
You can't do that to time.

Speaker 1 (25:52):
Sometimes ten minutes not enough, No, it's not.

Speaker 6 (25:54):
Sometimes you go in thinking it's one. Suddenly things it's
scene changes.

Speaker 2 (25:59):
Suddenly you're in a two, I sat down to my
business and while I was sitting down, so I catch
up on some emails. Next thing you know, the announcement
comes back on says your time has expired. Then it
repeats it your time has expired. Then the third time
your time has expired, please leave. And the door just
opened when I'm sat there with my you got it.

(26:23):
The other side of it was an elderly lady with
a big surprise in her face. I'm not sure whether
a shock or excitement. Mark, there's no ways excitement.

Speaker 1 (26:32):
Oh oh, I've always dreamed.

Speaker 2 (26:34):
Of meeting a man with his trousers do my anks
reading emails? What a hot mess? This smell of poo
in here as well? Oh, my fantasies Jilly Cooper novel.
I had to reach over, Oh the reach like that
as well, because you've got to use a protective shield

(26:54):
for one of the hands, haven't you yes, to cover
the barrier a dignity shield. Had to reach over push
the button for the door to close so I could
finish my paper book.

Speaker 1 (27:06):
Mark.

Speaker 6 (27:07):
That's a great story.

Speaker 2 (27:08):
We got another story now, being caught with your pants
down m V.

Speaker 1 (27:13):
Good morning, Welcome to the show.

Speaker 11 (27:15):
Good morning, Christian how are you going?

Speaker 2 (27:16):
I'm good. Are you having a good week? And thanks
for cool on the show. What's your story mate Friday?

Speaker 11 (27:20):
Thank god. I've got a small cleaning business and I've
got a referral for a new client. Went into the
city and the clients gave me permission to go upstairs
and do a walk through the unit. And I did
that and waiting for the clients offert, I fixed my
shorts and my singer pucket in and whatnot, and I
had my pants down in the en suite and the

(27:43):
clients decided to walk in. I didn't hear it. And
then as they walked in, I'm there with my pants down,
trying to dick them all up now and meet them
for the first time. So I didn't know if I
should be shaking their hands. Oh no, I got them
as a client and well done. And I still now

(28:04):
wonder to this day. It's probably been a year going strong.
And do they think or do they talk between them?

Speaker 1 (28:11):
So of course they did.

Speaker 11 (28:12):
They would have.

Speaker 2 (28:15):
Made up a role story about what they probably interrupted
what you're about to do in there?

Speaker 11 (28:20):
Exactly?

Speaker 1 (28:21):
Of course they do.

Speaker 2 (28:22):
You would, we all would if you saw someone going
the hell was he doing in there.

Speaker 11 (28:27):
I'm like some pretty boy. I look like, you know,
a half beaten bloke that's been run over by a truck.
So they're probably thinking discribed.

Speaker 2 (28:35):
Maybe that's what they were looking for. That's exciting, you know,
and they thought this guy is leaving us on. A
year later, they're still waiting for you to make good
on the deal. When are we going to get down
to it in this bedroom? You started this a year ago.

Speaker 6 (28:52):
Don't tell us you were adjusting your shorts. We've heard
that one before, sir, and send your price. Was a
great story. Thank you very much. Have a great weekend.

Speaker 11 (29:00):
Thank you, and you guys are great. I just started
listening to you guys and changed from other stations, and
you guys actually made people feel good.

Speaker 2 (29:08):
Oh, thank you very much. Envy and your story would
have done that as well. Very very funny story.

Speaker 6 (29:14):
Good week We will hell and welcome to the show, MV.
Have a great weekend.

Speaker 5 (29:18):
Christian O'Connell show, go on podcast.

Speaker 2 (29:22):
All right, So every Friday on the Christian O'Connor's Show,
we'll let you pick all the music. We turn the
last out of the show into a giant jukebox. People's
play this today is a very different one. It's a
song for your mum.

Speaker 1 (29:34):
Yeah, they were listening and calling and choose in the
music and just when hit.

Speaker 13 (29:41):
Eh, somebody pain the station, Charny play.

Speaker 1 (29:44):
The people's play Listen Christian calling right now, we help
Christian big the songs for Friday show.

Speaker 2 (29:54):
All right, so today the People's playlist it is songs
to your mum. Are going to call these mum dedications, mummacations.
So there's a song you love for your mom. Call
us now thirteen fifty five twenty two. You can also
taxt me oh four seventy five three one o four three, Patsy,
what's it for you?

Speaker 7 (30:11):
I'm going to give my mom some Lady Gaga today,
Born this way.

Speaker 6 (30:15):
Does she love Lady Gargo?

Speaker 7 (30:17):
No, but it's very appropriate and I'll tell you why.

Speaker 2 (30:23):
I just want to check because a lot of people
use this as a very special anthem from.

Speaker 6 (30:29):
A moment in their life.

Speaker 7 (30:32):
What I want to say is my mom is one
a person of strength and resilience. She is absolutely incredible.
She is a karr a born terrer, She was a
nurse and she is the most amazing mom. I'm so
lucky I got such a good one and she just
she's caring for my dad now and I just she's
never stopped hearingak. She is incredible Christian. She is just

(30:55):
an amazing woman and the strength. I come from a
long line of very strong women. Her mother was strong,
My great grandmother was really resilient. They're off the land.
They were women who work the land with their husbands.
They were just they never stopped, never ever stopped. And
I'm sure all the strength and I've needed strength over
my life and it's because of my mum and the

(31:16):
example that she's shown me and her resilience.

Speaker 2 (31:19):
You can see you could feel the strength of the
line of mums before you, your ancestry coming through you
and to your daughter already.

Speaker 7 (31:25):
Yep, absolutely kick ass. And Audrey is the same. I
remember when she was about two, we had one of
those you know, those clam clam pools, and we had it.

Speaker 8 (31:34):
Filled with balls.

Speaker 7 (31:36):
Anyway, she didn't like where it was, so she literally
picked it up at two years of age and Chris
and I were just like dumbfounded watching it carrying it
across the backyard and I thought, Yep, she comes from my.

Speaker 8 (31:48):
Line of women.

Speaker 7 (31:49):
But she's so strong, and you know, I have had
a lot through life. I've had infertility and pregnancy loss
and going through cancer, and there's no way I don't
feel that I could have gone through that if it
wasn't for all the values that my mother instilled in
me and the example that she gave me. She's amazing.
She's eighty two. She is just incredible. She's like an

(32:11):
eighty two year old in a sixty.

Speaker 8 (32:12):
Two year old's body. She just I've never known anyone.

Speaker 2 (32:15):
With you're going to give her a compliment, maybe put
it in like a thirty two year old. No one
is like, no one's going to jim agu whatever the
body of a sixty two year old.

Speaker 6 (32:23):
What can I work out? We talk about that.

Speaker 1 (32:25):
I show you're fifty three incredible.

Speaker 8 (32:27):
She's like the energizer bunny.

Speaker 6 (32:29):
She just go and shut out. What's your name?

Speaker 7 (32:34):
I love you so much, Mum, and everything that you do,
You're amazing. I hope you realize how special you.

Speaker 6 (32:38):
Are, Alex. What's your song?

Speaker 10 (32:40):
It's funny the your musical taste is sort of often
decided by what you grow up listening to, and Mum
would always have the Temptations the four Top Stevie Wonder
just on loop with that record player playing throughout the house,
cleaning the house, doing whatever she did. And I'm going
to nominate this amazing song. It's called Once in My
Life by Stevie Wonder. She adores this song.

Speaker 6 (33:01):
It's a brilliant song.

Speaker 2 (33:02):
Mid sixties, early early body of a sixty two year
old she look after.

Speaker 6 (33:08):
Or seventy two.

Speaker 1 (33:10):
And yeah, and that music.

Speaker 10 (33:11):
I think Mum sort of relied on you.

Speaker 1 (33:13):
You say resilience, Pats. You know, a farmer's wife leeds resilience, and.

Speaker 10 (33:18):
That's exactly what what Mum had to sort of do
for many years. And yeah, bringing out four kids on
a farm through drought, et cetera, et cetera. So yeah,
this one's for mom.

Speaker 6 (33:28):
Oh lovely story, guys, Rio, what are you going for?

Speaker 1 (33:31):
I'm going for Joan. I'm a training.

Speaker 6 (33:33):
She got a song about a gift being about a
week late.

Speaker 2 (33:37):
This This lazy our son got his Mother's Day gift
yesterday and seems to think that Express Post are going
to deliver a wait for a beach chair by Sunday.

Speaker 1 (33:46):
It will be.

Speaker 2 (33:51):
Not their job to deliver on Sunday. We've been talking
about Mother's Day on the show for two weeks, yes,
but to find you have time Wednesday to go through
bed shopping and cue.

Speaker 1 (34:02):
It takes time to find the perfect beach chair back.

Speaker 2 (34:06):
You can't like like tubing, and it's like Cinderella searching
for the perpet slippers.

Speaker 6 (34:12):
Then yeah, exactly what's the song for mom?

Speaker 1 (34:14):
Then my mud so on the weekends for twelve years,
my mum gave up her Saturdays and Sundays to drift
me all around Sydney for cricket, for tennis, for AFL,
for debating, literally going across the city. God knows how
much you racked up in tolls and petrol and she
only had four CDs in her volvo. There was Damian Rice,
a very sad Irish singer.

Speaker 6 (34:35):
Cannon.

Speaker 2 (34:38):
Daughter, that mournful song she loved, sad slow a playlist.

Speaker 6 (34:44):
Before you take down another kidder.

Speaker 2 (34:47):
Turn that to bait club you were part of like
fight club first all debate club.

Speaker 6 (34:51):
You don't talk about it.

Speaker 1 (34:52):
It was Damien Rice, James Blunt, Wow, Lunchy Fans, the
two thousand and six Australian Idol winner Irishman Damian Lee
Banger and the only sort of album with any sort
of energy or pop to It was Joan Armer Trading's
greatest hits and we would blast drop the pilot. Oh
this is a banger. This is a Friday song as well.

(35:14):
For Mama Lese.

Speaker 6 (35:16):
Alison Body of a sixty two year old.

Speaker 2 (35:20):
Get Jack guys next week on the shar begin My
Little Quest score Australia's hottest sixty two year old. You
don't have to be sixty two, just look like a
sixty two year old.

Speaker 1 (35:31):
It could be twenty five.

Speaker 5 (35:34):
The Christian O'Connell show.

Speaker 2 (35:36):
Podcast Mummercations, Christian is Elizabeth for once in my lifetime.
It's an all time favorite for me. Can't carry hokey song,
ask Alla Sybys. Listen to Darren Percival's version. It's amazing.
Listen you can't offer up Stevie Wonder and go wait.
Listen to someone called Darren's version of it. No just
aspect but it's Stevie Wonder song. Christian, please play Don't

(35:59):
stop Me Now. For my mom, she loves this song,
absolutely loves it. For my mum, Tammy Best Mum versus
Nurse Boss from the ten year old and Kieran the
nine year Old. I get the feeling the way that's
written out that and actually sadly.

Speaker 6 (36:14):
Is from mum.

Speaker 8 (36:16):
Oh no, no, I.

Speaker 6 (36:17):
Get the feeling. It is those kids that age.

Speaker 1 (36:20):
They do nothing. I'm having such a good time. I'm
having a bar.

Speaker 6 (36:29):
What about this? If you like Christian please please, please please.

Speaker 2 (36:34):
It's a Friday song Pinu kolada song from my mum.
It's her favorite drink. She and dad always have one
the first night we're on a holiday. I love those
little stories like that. Dad always makes her a jug
of peanutkilada for her birthday every year.

Speaker 6 (36:50):
Chug, but.

Speaker 2 (36:53):
Mama's having a good time. Mama's crying. Actually, i'm's going
to bed eartie. Guys, we have to play that though.
That is a great one. Natalie, you didn't put your
mum's name only text message Natalie pauled and ping me back,
and I make sure we played that song and dedicate
it to your awesome mum.

Speaker 1 (37:12):
Leo. Good morning, Yes, good morning guys.

Speaker 4 (37:15):
How are we?

Speaker 6 (37:16):
We're good?

Speaker 1 (37:16):
Leo?

Speaker 6 (37:17):
So what's the song for mum?

Speaker 12 (37:19):
My Mom's Greek? There's only one song that you haven't
knew in English, and that's why kiss I was made
for loving you.

Speaker 6 (37:26):
Listen if you're only going to know one song in English?
This is a banger.

Speaker 1 (37:30):
Mom's Everybody love us Greak Momsster Mom. A Greek version
of this is a Greek covers band.

Speaker 6 (37:37):
They only do this one song. I'd love to see
a tribute band to Kiss, but this is.

Speaker 1 (37:44):
Mom Greek.

Speaker 2 (37:49):
In the main cup to Big Seilver Wings.

Speaker 1 (37:55):
Leo, We're definitely playing this for your mom. What's her
name is Anna?

Speaker 6 (37:59):
Anna? Well?

Speaker 2 (37:59):
Have you have a lovely weekend with your mum Anda
on Mother's Day? Leo, thank you very much for calling.
Thank you so much, pleasure, Sophie, Good morning, Welcome to
the show, Sophie. Hello, Hello Sophie. Right now, Sophie, you're twelve,
so are you getting ready for school right now?

Speaker 1 (38:14):
Yep?

Speaker 6 (38:15):
Thank you very much.

Speaker 2 (38:16):
According to this is a lovely thing to do for
your mom. Now, what's your mum's name? My mom's name
is Rachel, Rachel, and she's obviously an awesome mum. Yep, Okay,
what is your mom's If your mom had a superpower
like a superhero, what would your mom's superpower be?

Speaker 4 (38:33):
Honestly, I don't know too many.

Speaker 1 (38:36):
To choose from.

Speaker 6 (38:37):
Wow, Wow, we you don't know, Marvel don't have a
character call. And what does that one do? We don't
know yet.

Speaker 1 (38:43):
That's super much.

Speaker 6 (38:44):
She's a mom. They do everything. Yeah, I guess is
that she's awesome? Got any powers?

Speaker 2 (38:49):
No?

Speaker 6 (38:52):
I love this. This girl's going really well.

Speaker 1 (38:54):
She will love this.

Speaker 6 (38:55):
Now.

Speaker 2 (38:55):
What is the song that we can play for the
superhero with no powers.

Speaker 6 (39:01):
On?

Speaker 1 (39:01):
That's superpower. She's the best of everything.

Speaker 6 (39:10):
Now, are you in the car right now on the
school run with mum? Could she hear the phone call?

Speaker 5 (39:15):
Oh no, I'm with my Nan.

Speaker 4 (39:17):
My mom's working at Newcastle today.

Speaker 6 (39:19):
Oh wow, and NaN's looking after you. Yep, poor old Nana.
How's Nana doing?

Speaker 4 (39:26):
Oh she's pretty good.

Speaker 6 (39:27):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (39:28):
Did she sort out the right breakfast or does she
always get it wrong? Or she that you have sugary stuff?

Speaker 4 (39:33):
She makes the best breakfast, but my mom makes better?

Speaker 2 (39:36):
Oh well done? Hey, and have you got Mum's present
ready in the card?

Speaker 6 (39:40):
Really? For Sundays?

Speaker 4 (39:42):
I have I think three presents for my mom and
I hit them somewhere in the house. She's hearing this, then, moms,
you are not gonna find out where those presents are.

Speaker 6 (39:53):
You're listed right now.

Speaker 1 (39:54):
Mommy should be working in Newcastle day.

Speaker 6 (39:56):
That's why Nana's doing the run. Okay, no snoop, no Sophie.

Speaker 2 (40:02):
A real joy to hear you. Thank you very much
for calling the show. We're definitely playing your mum's song.

Speaker 1 (40:06):
Okay, thank you. Have an lovely weekend.

Speaker 6 (40:09):
Thank you.

Speaker 1 (40:10):
How we got here. Clarice, Hi, Christopher.

Speaker 3 (40:14):
My name is Clarice. Nice to meet you. I dedicate
this song called I Want to Danger Somebody by Whitney
here and because I love my mom and she's the best.

Speaker 2 (40:26):
Oh my god, that's so beautiful. I mean, you could
be the world's greatest youngest DJ if you like this
song as well. Yes, it's a great song and song,
isn't it? And so have you got Have you got
a card and a present ready for Sunday for Mum?

Speaker 3 (40:42):
Yes?

Speaker 6 (40:43):
Have you hidden it somewhere?

Speaker 3 (40:45):
Yeah?

Speaker 6 (40:46):
Does mom know where you've hidden it? Is it under
your bed?

Speaker 9 (40:49):
No?

Speaker 6 (40:50):
Is it in the cupboard?

Speaker 3 (40:53):
Not really? I mean like it's in this toy place
where we have a home, and I hit in it
and we wrote a letter that so it do not
touch a right.

Speaker 2 (41:05):
Yeah, that's a great system there, that is think of. Well, listen,
you have a fantastic weekend. Thank you very much for calling.
The show as well. That's all right, take care, Let's
go to Michelle.

Speaker 6 (41:17):
Now. These calls are great. I love them so much.

Speaker 1 (41:19):
Michelle. What's the song we can play for mum?

Speaker 13 (41:22):
I would love you to play Dancing on the Ceiling
by Lionel Richie. My mom. Her name was Bonne and
she passed away about twenty five years ago. It's so
very good, a bit cheery, but I'm supposed to feel
happy about it. It's my favorite song. It gets me going.
We used to play so much music on the weekends
when she would do housework and we'd all jump around

(41:45):
and dance. And I've really done that a lot with
my kids and my first Mother's Day alone because they
both live in another state at university. So I'd love
you to play that for me.

Speaker 2 (41:58):
Oh my word, that's tough. What a lovely story as
well about still filling him. I'm around you now with
this song as well. That's the power up music to do.
It brings them closer to us again.

Speaker 3 (42:08):
Excellent.

Speaker 6 (42:12):
So what are you going to do, Michelle?

Speaker 2 (42:13):
We're empty nesters, but the kids, luckily they're coming back
from Mother's days center. But what are you going to
do to still have a special day because you're still
their mummy. I bet you sound like an autumn mum
as well. What are you going to do to have
a good day?

Speaker 13 (42:24):
Look, I'll probably have a little sleeping and I've held
my hobby. I just don't want to cook. I don't
care what we eat, but I'm not cooking and I'm
not cleaning, so it'll.

Speaker 2 (42:34):
Probably waking more or less the same instruction I was
given three weeks ago. Can't you bother to go out?
I'm not cooking, I'm not clearing it up. I went,
I will do that anyway, But yes, gladly do that.
That's the greatest gift, isn't it?

Speaker 5 (42:47):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (42:48):
Absolutely, you could just lie on the couch all day, or.

Speaker 13 (42:53):
I can, you know, have a glass of wine at eleven.

Speaker 2 (42:56):
O'clock, I don't care, No, you can, or an entire
jug of peanutolada.

Speaker 1 (43:03):
Yeah, Michelle Gali, that was my.

Speaker 13 (43:04):
Mum's favorite drinks.

Speaker 2 (43:06):
Ith, we're also going to play that the next hour
as well.

Speaker 1 (43:09):
Well.

Speaker 6 (43:10):
We're definitely going to play Dancing on the Ceiling for
your mum as well. Now, what was her name?

Speaker 13 (43:13):
Wonderful Yvonne yvon Okay, Well.

Speaker 6 (43:16):
We're definitely playing for her.

Speaker 2 (43:17):
Have a great day Mother's Day as well, and I
hope you can fill in your mum's presence to coast
here as well.

Speaker 13 (43:22):
Thank you so much. Have a wonderful weekend guys.

Speaker 1 (43:24):
Take care.

Speaker 3 (43:25):
Thanks you too.

Speaker 5 (43:26):
By the Christian O'Connell show podcast.

Speaker 2 (43:30):
This is the Christian O'Connell Show for Kimi's Warehouse. We're
about to find out who is Australia's funniest mum today.

Speaker 6 (43:40):
This radio show, in this radio station. We're now in
a separate room.

Speaker 2 (43:44):
We've left the studio and we are in the Mum's
Comedy Club Rio.

Speaker 1 (43:49):
The big prize that one of these amazing mums is
going to win is a two nights day at the
Hang On a Minute.

Speaker 6 (43:55):
Hang On a week.

Speaker 2 (43:56):
We actually got an audience as well, so as he
starts to read the prize out, be like an audience
on an old school eighties and nineties game show.

Speaker 6 (44:03):
Go Oh Today.

Speaker 1 (44:06):
Star prize is a two night stay at the Langham
Melbourne for you and a friend, a lunch at the
Langham Melbourne restaurants Moms love a long lunch, a Twan
spa treatment for you and your friend love a Schwang.

Speaker 2 (44:23):
Spa and access to the ladies called Schwan's.

Speaker 6 (44:26):
That's what that schwang Spa is, by the way.

Speaker 1 (44:29):
And access to the Langham Club including afternoon tea, evening
cannapeys and cocktail.

Speaker 2 (44:36):
Now, no mom goes home a loser Today, every single
one of the runners ups get six hundred dollars to
spend on air Tasco where you can get anything done.
All right, let's play the theme tune and then it's
fined Australia's Funniest Mom.

Speaker 1 (44:51):
Mom's gonna tell the Joe Mama gon make you laugh,
Selly Mary on this call, They're gonna make you laugh.

Speaker 2 (45:01):
All right, So first of all, first things first, it's
one thing. It takes an enormous amount of courage to
call a radio show and a joke.

Speaker 6 (45:09):
It takes a lot more courage to.

Speaker 2 (45:11):
Come here in the morning, live on the radio, live
to Australia and tala joke as a stand up mum.
So big round applause for all the mum's brave enough
to do that. Two mums dropped out overnight. I'm not surprised.
I better it's a lot. Now we're not going to
judge this today. Judging this is Australia's second funniest Mum,

(45:34):
and that is Patrina Jones big run of a thank
you supermum on the show.

Speaker 7 (45:39):
Can I say they've already offered bribes Christians? So it's
already a bit underhanded. We haven't even started it.

Speaker 1 (45:45):
And what are you looking for in today's winner?

Speaker 7 (45:47):
Just a good tummy laugh, Just something that's gonna lighten
my day and just make me laugh.

Speaker 8 (45:52):
That's all I need, just a good good laugh.

Speaker 2 (45:56):
The women are now incredibly intimidated by you. No like
Simon Cow, the Australian version of Simon Cow.

Speaker 6 (46:03):
Mama Cow.

Speaker 8 (46:04):
Really you'll all be great, don't.

Speaker 2 (46:06):
Be nervous, Okay, now up, first morning is Rita? Rita?
Good luck? Well done for being the first one. Thank
you all right, Rita? What is your joke please for us?

Speaker 9 (46:15):
Well, this is a story about a couple called Morris
and Ethel. Every year they go to the fair and
every year Moras says Ethel, I would really love to
fly that have a ride in that aerobatic plane. Well,
money's tired at the moment, Moros, And you know that

(46:38):
rides fifty dollars and fifty dollars is fifty dollars. So
the following year they go to the fair and Morris says, Ethel,
I'm eighty five years old, and if I don't ride
this plane, I probably never will I know, Morris. She says,
but it's fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars.

(47:00):
So at this point the pilot he's hearing all this conversation,
and he said, hey, guys, come over here.

Speaker 1 (47:07):
I'll make you a deal.

Speaker 9 (47:09):
I'll take you both up. If when I take you up,
you don't make a sound, you cannot say anything and
I won't charge you, but if you make one sound,
it'll be fifty dollars. So they talked about it and
I said okay. So up they went, and the pilot
did all the best he could, all his maneuvers and

(47:30):
all his dead devil stunts, and then when they landed
the plane, he said to Morris, you know, Morris, I
tried everything to make you scream or yell out, but
you didn't. I'm so impressed, mmm, said Morris. Well, to
be honest, I was going to say something when Ethel

(47:53):
fell out, but fifty dollars is fifty dollars.

Speaker 2 (47:57):
Come on, come on, Rita. Big grumbles are the first
mom this morning. That is Rita. She's also just getting
over from surgery as well. I just want to say
so she's still came up here to do that.

Speaker 6 (48:09):
Rita. That was incredible. You were so relaxed and calm.

Speaker 1 (48:13):
Patsy, how great was that?

Speaker 7 (48:15):
That was great? Brilliantly delivered. Your timing was perfect.

Speaker 2 (48:19):
You were so confident and relaxed. You took your time,
you didn't reach to own the room. Yeah, and a
really really great joke. She's getting a standing ovation standing ovations.

Speaker 1 (48:30):
Come on, get up your lazy gits. You didn't pay
a buck to get in there.

Speaker 2 (48:34):
Stand up, Rita, well done, strong start, Thank you very much.
All right, now this mon's flowing in from Sydney. Alysia,
step up to the microphone, step up to the world's
tiniest stage.

Speaker 5 (48:45):
Hi.

Speaker 8 (48:46):
I hate to correct you, but it's a Lissa Alyssa.

Speaker 2 (48:48):
Yeah, Lissa, okay, already one of the mu must give
me the old skin. Put don't worra am using out
every morning from six to nine from Patsy.

Speaker 1 (48:56):
All right, so off you go, good luck? All right?
Why are chickens the best animal?

Speaker 8 (49:03):
I don't know why. Chickens the best animal.

Speaker 1 (49:05):
Because it's a quick one.

Speaker 6 (49:08):
But it's a good one.

Speaker 1 (49:09):
It's a strong one. The crowd loves it today, Well done?
All right. Now we have.

Speaker 2 (49:15):
The most nervous looking mum. Come on up, come on up.
Actually looks like she's been dragged here against her will?
Can you confirm you are not a hostage? You're doing
this willingly? I'm worried.

Speaker 14 (49:25):
I can neither confirm nor deny.

Speaker 6 (49:27):
Okay, look the crowd they really love you.

Speaker 1 (49:29):
Okay, good luck.

Speaker 6 (49:30):
What's your joke for us?

Speaker 14 (49:31):
So a guy walks into a library and he goes
up to the counter and he says, can I have
a hamburger? And the librarian says this is a library
and he goes, oh, sorry, can I the hamburger?

Speaker 6 (49:45):
Yes?

Speaker 1 (49:46):
Another strong joke, Patsy the judge, Did you like that one?
I loved? Well done? Love, that was brilliant.

Speaker 2 (49:51):
All right. The last mom steps up? Now, good luck,
strong standards. So far, let's see what you've got. Okay,
what's your joke for us?

Speaker 9 (50:00):
My joke is why don't birds wear underwear.

Speaker 5 (50:08):
Big?

Speaker 8 (50:08):
Because they're peckers on their face?

Speaker 5 (50:13):
Wow?

Speaker 6 (50:13):
Done and good aid?

Speaker 1 (50:16):
Wow done? Wow?

Speaker 6 (50:18):
All right? Another un pause.

Speaker 2 (50:20):
Then for all the mums that get up there this
morning takes so much courage. Well do a big run
the pause to all the mums before we announce the
winning mum. And they're all winning mums. But Patsy, there
can only be one winter of this morning. Who is
winning the ultimate five star luxury pampering weekend.

Speaker 7 (50:36):
This is really hard. Strong performances by all four. All
your kids would be so proud of you. This is
so hard.

Speaker 8 (50:43):
We've got one kid in the crowd proud of mum.

Speaker 2 (50:46):
But I do have to look him in the eye
and say, your mum didn't make it. She was she
was singling him out. Your mum's here, killer of dreams.

Speaker 8 (50:55):
But I'm afraid it has.

Speaker 1 (50:58):
To be Why are you afraid?

Speaker 2 (51:00):
Have you ever done? Have you ever been the judge before? No,
you're not afraid, You're happy to say. But the good
news is.

Speaker 8 (51:06):
The good news is the winner is Simone.

Speaker 1 (51:09):
W Simon's the winner. Simone, come up to Patchy.

Speaker 6 (51:15):
You are the winner.

Speaker 1 (51:16):
You've been crowned by Patsy. The winner.

Speaker 2 (51:19):
Simone wins two nights five star of the Luxuries Langham
Hotel Wild.

Speaker 1 (51:23):
Don't congratulations, step up there. Wow, you know where's the crown?

Speaker 6 (51:30):
We don't have a crown.

Speaker 2 (51:32):
Has anyone got a beanie hat we can borrow as
a matshift? Can we borrow your beanie hat as a
makeshift crown? Thank you, Patty, get the beanie hat. It's
just gonna have to be a makeshift crown. Two beanie hats.
The winning mom, Australia's funniest mom. Congratulations, well done, very
very well done. Brilliant joking. He called in the other day. Now,

(51:52):
who are you gonna take with you? Get two nights
five star. You're gonna be sport at the Langham Hotel
here Melbourne? Who are you taking with you?

Speaker 9 (51:59):
I will be taking my partner day Dave James.

Speaker 2 (52:04):
Looks he gets a free weekend and Dave's done nothing.
Well Dave, well done. All the moms, you did a
great job. The three running up moms, you did a
fantastic job. You get six hundred dollars to spend a
air tasker to get anything done. Thank you very much
for taking part in this. It was a lot of
fun hearing all these jokes. I hope you really enjoyed
it as well. I think something would definitely do again
next year. All of you have and all the mums

(52:26):
in the crowd as well, have a lovely Mother's Day
this weekend.

Speaker 1 (52:29):
Alright, well, big.

Speaker 5 (52:30):
Running Christian Connell Show podcast, Christian.

Speaker 2 (52:35):
I loved hearing all the mums doing the jokes. What
also joke Simone did? I didn't pay attention to the names?
Please listeners listen harder. Please text me.

Speaker 1 (52:46):
I'm doing a radio show right now. What am I flipping? Pa,
I'm on.

Speaker 2 (52:51):
The decks here. Please text me on going in for
a swim. It was this from my wife.

Speaker 1 (52:55):
I send Linda. Linda's surname English.

Speaker 2 (52:59):
You're behaving like an English person who's still demanding I
send Linda.

Speaker 6 (53:04):
Here's the joke just for you. Made the producers get this.

Speaker 8 (53:07):
Why don't birds wear underwear.

Speaker 2 (53:12):
Because they're pickers on their face? There are a certain
age you'll know what peckers used to mean. And Linda,
I need to say something to the producers about the names. Now,
when people do when listeners come in and do stuff,
are on the show with us, Obviously the show moves
very very quickly. So suddenly we're doing something in a studio,

(53:35):
we leap out with somewhere else and.

Speaker 6 (53:37):
So the team. This is always works in radio.

Speaker 2 (53:39):
They will put the listeners' names on giant stickers or
on them so I can quickly see in it. We
can all see who's who. Often it can be five, ten,
twenty listeners. I don't think it's right to have ladies'
names on their chests where they put them today, which
is why I cover them.

Speaker 6 (53:54):
I didn't even say their name.

Speaker 2 (53:56):
I don't want to be seen on camera staring at
their breasts talking into a microphone because people thinking, oh, yeah,
that guy, he shouldn't be They've cleaned up radio for
people like him, is there so, which is why some
of them might even sit there because I'm not.

Speaker 6 (54:12):
I can't stare.

Speaker 1 (54:13):
There, your hands above your.

Speaker 6 (54:15):
Eyes sea level.

Speaker 2 (54:19):
I don't know what the answer is, is it forehead?

Speaker 1 (54:24):
It's even I think almost stranger to be staring.

Speaker 8 (54:28):
At the down around the growing.

Speaker 1 (54:30):
It's still around the area. Asus you just sat down
around they're growing?

Speaker 6 (54:33):
And whose armor is around there?

Speaker 1 (54:34):
Growing?

Speaker 8 (54:35):
Your hands and your arms are boy, your son, you've.

Speaker 2 (54:38):
Got a problem. You've got more problems than me looking
in the wrong place. Any Who, good chat guys today,
said David Anborough.

Speaker 6 (54:47):
One of the worlds surely we can all agree.

Speaker 2 (54:49):
Probably one of the world's greatest human beings generations and
generations and generations learning about the wonder and beauty of
the natural planet. Thanks for that man, incredible voice, incredible
way of making it poetic.

Speaker 6 (55:04):
Just to be doing it for so long.

Speaker 2 (55:06):
And he's one hundred, he's still he's still make king
us care about the planet in a different kind of way. Now,
So today's time waste dedicated to Sir David Admer. He
is one hundred today. No finer way to dedicate the
show to him with an animal TV shows.

Speaker 1 (55:21):
He'll be so honored, hear.

Speaker 6 (55:22):
When he hears about this, he will.

Speaker 2 (55:24):
He's filmed in over one hundred countries across three hundred
and thirty three locations every continent on Earth, and is
believed to be the most widely travel human in history.

Speaker 1 (55:35):
Yeah, who could possibly have been that.

Speaker 6 (55:39):
He's had more than fifty animals named in his honor.

Speaker 1 (55:42):
That's incredible. And now a time wise stuff.

Speaker 2 (55:45):
Yeah, he's the reason tennis balls are yellow not white.

Speaker 6 (55:48):
Excuse he's a true story. I've heard this before.

Speaker 2 (55:51):
During his time at the BBC, he was a producer
for many years, and the journals at the BBC. He
convinced Wimbledon to change the color of the balls so
they could be seen better on TV.

Speaker 1 (56:00):
That's incredible, that's huge.

Speaker 2 (56:02):
Yes, all right, so today, thanks to Coger and Cogre
dot com, perhaps you get what you want for less now.
That's clicking awesome, five hundred dollars to spend at cogan
dot com. We're looking for your animal TV shows, Game
of Bones, Silver bas Welcome back Otter, Welcome Backtter.

Speaker 6 (56:28):
A lot of our listeners.

Speaker 2 (56:29):
Your mama, your mama's mamay is like that.

Speaker 6 (56:34):
Slack our son.

Speaker 2 (56:35):
He didn't get that gift to yesterday.

Speaker 6 (56:38):
Welcome back ter.

Speaker 1 (56:39):
If you know you know Gilmour gorillas, gold food ferrets.
That's a man sons of Aardvarky. Very good gold Ria.
What have you got I've got? Did you know they
cast a new doctor who is a bird?

Speaker 6 (56:55):
I heard about that.

Speaker 1 (56:56):
The doctor Hood doctor.

Speaker 6 (57:01):
These mama's just school us all.

Speaker 1 (57:04):
Back at our.

Speaker 6 (57:07):
Bronze.

Speaker 1 (57:07):
There's a humper, it's summer bay. Oh yeah, it's home
in a whale.

Speaker 6 (57:11):
Oh no, that's a better gold he found it.

Speaker 1 (57:13):
And finally Kat and Kim.

Speaker 6 (57:15):
Chat and Kim also gold as well.

Speaker 5 (57:18):
Christian O'Connell show, Go On podcast.

Speaker 2 (57:22):
Christian O'Connell's show, Today's time Waste are dedicated to the
grace of David Aton. We're looking for your animal TV shows,
Tasmanian Daredevil splus.

Speaker 6 (57:38):
Who wants to be a Chinchillionaire?

Speaker 2 (57:40):
That is gold Weld One, John Black Crab, your Enthusiasm,
Silver Ted Lassoos a horse.

Speaker 1 (57:50):
Love the World on? Paula Lassus or Genius.

Speaker 6 (57:56):
How about the fresh Prince of Humphrey b Bear.

Speaker 2 (58:01):
No, come on a Humphrey Bee Bear One's gold see
our un tongue is the new black Silver Goggle Fox
God on.

Speaker 1 (58:16):
The Ducks of Hazard.

Speaker 6 (58:18):
Just to get up boys Silver Bass.

Speaker 2 (58:23):
Everybody all over the world loves Antiques road Show? What's
the animal version of that Antiques roadkill? Pitapus from the
nineteen fifties, Louis the Fifth, Love two.

Speaker 1 (58:43):
And the Giraffe Men.

Speaker 2 (58:47):
Give it up for David Peters, gilla Hen's Island, gilla
Hen Silence, Silver Gilligan's Iguana. Enough Gilligans. Now the farmer
wants a beaver? No, because it we're saying it's animal
chimney shows. Beaver is a great animal, you know, beaver.

Speaker 1 (59:08):
And let's The farmer wants to be farmers want to
be in my house.

Speaker 2 (59:15):
Some pets and heat Exterminating the beaver.

Speaker 1 (59:17):
Will do, shut down some trees. You can't afford a chainsaw,
Get a beaver. Miami Mice silver. I would watch that.

Speaker 2 (59:26):
Just too detective cops undercovered, deep, undercovered, too little tiny mice,
so much detail that one breaking back silks and the
great British snake off Brad Bishop, well done?

Speaker 1 (59:44):
All right?

Speaker 6 (59:44):
Who is blood that time? Who is we should be
out of you by now? Who is the winner?

Speaker 1 (59:50):
Ted Lassuit.

Speaker 6 (59:54):
Should be? The farmer wants a beaver?

Speaker 5 (59:57):
That had it all that did Guys Christian O'Connell show
on podcast hurry.

Speaker 2 (01:00:03):
Into kimnist Warehouse for their massive Mother's Dave Fragrance sale.
Get Georgio Arman see thirty mil for eighty nine ninety
nine in storing online.

Speaker 5 (01:00:12):
Now Chemist warehouse is Fragrance