August 31, 2026 • 32 mins
We take a look back at some of our favourite moments, from online ordering disasters to awkward workplace encounters and everything in between.
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Speaker 1 (00:10):
iHeart Podcasts. Hear more gold podcasts, playlists, and listen live
on the free iHeart app. Got anything good?
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Hey, this is the Christian O'Connell Show Podcast.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
Spoil Dad This Father's Day with the Chemist Warehouse Fragrance Sale.
Speaker 3 (00:31):
Shop a huge range of big brand fragrances at the
lowest prices.
Speaker 1 (00:34):
Chemist Warehouse, helping you spoil dad this father's day. Hey,
pod squad. My new book, Unscript, The Radical Act of
Being Yourself, is now actually out, which actually means you
can buy online or in your good independent bookshops, and
also the audiobook, which is voiced by me, and also
you can get the Kindle as well. So please, As
(00:54):
you're reading it in the book, you'll realize I've got
my personal email in there. Please let me know how
you get on with it as well. I hope you
really enjoy it. Please check it out. Unscript, The Radical
Act of Being Yourself. And now today's show. Enjoy.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
The Christian O'Connell Show podcast.
Speaker 1 (01:13):
Patsy, please tell us about the thing that you ordered
that is not what you ordered.
Speaker 4 (01:17):
Don't you hate it when you're really pumped for something,
like you're really looking for it? You make an online
purchase and you think, this is going to be so good.
Speaker 1 (01:25):
This is me virtually every week where I think, oh,
my God, my life is going to be better. You
open it up and you're like, oh, my God. I know.
Speaker 4 (01:32):
This is what happened to me. So my podcast, Rage
Against the Menopause, I just thought it would be really
good for the videos this season if I had specially
designed microphone poppers, which is the foam that goes over.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
Branding.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
You know. Mr Beast can't do it all. I'm not
saying you're Mrs Beast. I'm just saying his production values
are high level. You all right?
Speaker 5 (01:58):
Anyway, I saw these.
Speaker 4 (02:00):
Just, you know, like in the algorithm sort of popped up,
you know, get your own microphone.
Speaker 3 (02:05):
I've never had that.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
Weird, isn't it? So niche.
Speaker 3 (02:09):
Really weird.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
KSI, you and the Logans. I mean, how many of
those days? About eight a year? Bespoke microphone covers.
Speaker 4 (02:18):
That was weird.
Speaker 1 (02:19):
I've never seen that come up in the algorithm.
Speaker 4 (02:20):
You could get mugs and all sorts in the hotel.
My covers look really good. I'll order a couple of those.
Speaker 1 (02:25):
Yeah, because we've got them. I'm talking into one right now.
It's just the name of the show, the Christian O'Connell show.
They look nice. You're right. I'm on the video now.
They look good.
Speaker 3 (02:33):
Yeah, it's really good branding.
Speaker 1 (02:34):
So what have you got, Rage Against the Menopause ones?
Speaker 4 (02:35):
Yeah, so it's just like the tile that you would
see if you bring up the iHeart app and you
see there's my podcast.
Speaker 3 (02:42):
It's a photo of me.
Speaker 1 (02:42):
Oh, so it's like your face?
Speaker 3 (02:43):
Yeah, it's just like my logo.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
I've never seen them with the host's face on. So
you go from face to face.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
Face here, face there. Wow. I love it. I've never
seen that before.
Speaker 4 (02:58):
Anyway, they've come.
Speaker 1 (02:59):
I'll let Howard Stern and all the other big DJs know, guys,
we've been getting it wrong. It's not your name. You're
talking to your own face.
Speaker 6 (03:05):
I often think that when I'm looking at you, it's like,
it's not enough Christian face.
Speaker 1 (03:09):
I need a bit more Christian. So how about a
face on this?
Speaker 4 (03:12):
Wall-to-wall Christian.
Speaker 1 (03:14):
And then also might as well get some T-shirts with
my own face on as well. So Patsy on a T-shirt,
on the mic cover, on screen.
Speaker 4 (03:20):
Everywhere you look.
Speaker 1 (03:21):
Double threat.
Speaker 4 (03:22):
Anyway, they've come, but they're like ridiculously small.
Speaker 1 (03:26):
They're like a thimble.
Speaker 4 (03:27):
They're like a thimble size.
Speaker 1 (03:29):
Rio's got one.
Speaker 5 (03:29):
Mic socks.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
I've just seen it's tiny.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
It's ridiculous.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
It's like a beef eater's hat for a mouse. It's small.
The Meister, Gard, Buckingham Palace would wear that on top
of their heads.
Speaker 3 (03:41):
It's for a toy kid's microphone. It really is.
Speaker 4 (03:44):
Yeah, like a Fisher, you know, price little plastic.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
You know what that whiff's of? Yes. Do you order these?
It wasn't.
Speaker 4 (03:52):
It actually wasn't.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
It whips of Timu.
Speaker 4 (03:54):
No, I've never ordered on Timu.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
Straight off a boat from China. No. No, it's all flaky.
Speaker 3 (03:59):
It's sort of stretched as well.
Speaker 1 (04:01):
It's terrible.
Speaker 3 (04:02):
It is awful.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
It says very cheaply done.
Speaker 6 (04:03):
The A and the I in against are sort of
squished over, so it's just rage against the menopause.
Speaker 1 (04:08):
Asian against the menopause.
Speaker 4 (04:09):
It's not even square.
Speaker 3 (04:11):
The square isn't square.
Speaker 1 (04:12):
Big market, actually. Maybe rebrand it.
Speaker 4 (04:14):
30 bucks, I'd play a page for this.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
But then the visual doesn't match up the title of
the show. She's not Asian at all. She's a fake Asian.
Speaker 4 (04:22):
But I paid 15 bucks each, and it is the
worst 30 bucks I've ever spent.
Speaker 1 (04:26):
I'm not joking. I could draw you better than that. No.
Speaker 4 (04:29):
It is awful.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
I wouldn't pay $ 1.
Speaker 5 (04:33):
50.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
No, seriously, Pat, you would be 15 bucks each.
Speaker 4 (04:36):
Yes, and they took like six weeks to get here.
Speaker 7 (04:39):
Yeah, that's because like five Norweys are then laughing at
who would want such a thing.
Speaker 1 (04:44):
Yeah. So that is a massive amount. How many have
you got of them?
Speaker 4 (04:51):
Just two. One for me, one for the guest.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
The guest is going to be opposite you, looking at you,
talking into your face. It's the scariest show ever.
Speaker 4 (05:01):
Aren't they awful? 30 bucks down the drain.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
No, no, no.
Speaker 1 (05:07):
We're going to give them away this week on the show.
These are the star prizes, Pats.
Speaker 4 (05:11):
I love it.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
The Christian O'Connell Show podcast.
Speaker 1 (05:15):
That's not what I ordered. We've all done what Patsy's done.
You get very excited about ordering something online. You're counting down.
It arrives. You open it up. Oh, God. That's not
what I ordered. It's too big. It's too small. It's
too crap. Bizarrely, my recent one that arrived last week
from America, I opened it up and my wife said,
my God, what the hell have you ordered? I hear
(05:36):
this a lot in my house. She goes, oh, my God,
it looks so bad. What is it? I said, it's
a microphone lamp.
Speaker 6 (05:45):
Oh, no, Christian O'Connell.
Speaker 4 (05:48):
What do you mean, like a ring light?
Speaker 1 (05:50):
No, no, no, no. This is a lamp that looks
exactly like one of those old steel microphones, like an old-fashioned.
Because you work in radio.
Speaker 6 (06:00):
I work in radio.
Speaker 4 (06:01):
Oh, and it's a lamp.
Speaker 1 (06:03):
Yeah. That's so adorable.
Speaker 3 (06:05):
That's like having that, like, yeah, Patsy has that. Sorry, Patsy,
no offense, but your on-ear sign. Yeah, I love it.
Speaker 4 (06:10):
You two are just as bad as each other. In
the house.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
This lamp, right. Not what I ordered. It just looks terrible.
Not just that, it doesn't work. So I didn't realize,
because it's from America, it's got like an American plug.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
Oh, yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
So I go out and buy an adapter. I plug
it in. It short-circuits the entire house.
Speaker 4 (06:28):
Oh, no.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Sweats of God. You just heard this, and everything went off.
The fridge has gone off. I had a freezer. What
is it? I went, microphone lamp.
Speaker 3 (06:37):
Oh, no. It's so bad. I need to see it.
Speaker 1 (06:41):
Someone can have it. You can short-circuit your house with
this terrible bogan lamp that's a microphone lamp. And again,
I don't even know. You know when you're looking at it,
you go, I don't.
Speaker 3 (06:52):
Know what to order this for.
Speaker 1 (06:54):
Were you drunk? No, I was sober, which is sadder
in a way. Sadder in a way. Christian, my brother-in-law
bought a frying pan from Amazon. He was so excited
to cook steaks on it. He was pumped. It rocked up,
could barely fit half an egg on it. He was crushed. Lorraine,
that's not what I ordered. Good morning, Lorraine. What is
it for you?
Speaker 5 (07:14):
I got tea mood.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
I got tea mood.
Speaker 7 (07:17):
It's because it gets so bloody cheap on there.
Speaker 5 (07:20):
Well, most things I've ordered were really good, but this
time I actually ordered a pack of 10 kitchen tea towels.
And when they arrived, they were the size of a
face washer.
Speaker 1 (07:34):
Like a child's potens or tea ceremony.
Speaker 5 (07:37):
So I came up with a solution. I work in
a pub. So I took them to work and I
got my money back from work through Petit Cash and
we used them to polish glasses.
Speaker 1 (07:47):
Yeah, you could polish, you're right, polish the bar top.
Use them as coasters for the beers.
Speaker 6 (07:55):
We actually, we don't have tea towels at our work
anymore because everyone kept stealing them because we had really
nice tea towels.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
I took one home. I took one home. No, they're
like pro grade. They're really thick. Yeah, the ones I've
got are really like, they're too porous. So yeah, that
one here, I took one home. It's a beautiful tea towel. Yeah,
the green and white ones. That's why we don't have
any anymore. That's good, but they're very nice. Tell us
the decade you were a kid in without telling us
(08:25):
the decade. So for me, telling you the decade I
was a kid in without actually telling you the decade,
children's parties at McDonald's.
Speaker 5 (08:34):
Oh.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
Good times.
Speaker 3 (08:36):
What did you guys have in England?
Speaker 1 (08:37):
And it was like Ronald then was in charge. Yes.
He was the CEO. Ronald McDonald. Sort of dropped off
a bit, hasn't he? Yeah, rightly so. Rightly so. Scary-ass
clown man, really.
Speaker 4 (08:46):
And Hamburglar.
Speaker 1 (08:48):
Hamburglar, yes. I forgot about Hamburglar.
Speaker 4 (08:50):
There's a few of them.
Speaker 1 (08:51):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (08:52):
Yeah, bring them back.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
It used to be like you got so excited if
a mate of yours was having their birthday party at McDonald's. Yes.
It was the best place. When you were like 8, 9, 10,
it was the best place. And it was also when
It was like the first sort of thing of like
having America in the high street. Right. Now it's too much.
We want them to go back home. But then it
was like, it was a novelty. It was only really them.
And then Burger King came in as well. But it
(09:15):
was first, it was McDonald's.
Speaker 6 (09:16):
And did you guys have the play centres like we
do in Australia? So you've got the Maccas and then you've.
Speaker 3 (09:21):
Got the ball pit.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Yes.
Speaker 4 (09:22):
Awesome places.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
Yeah, they were massive. Just look back now. Now, you know,
if it's too noisy anywhere, I have to leave. But
then at the time when those kids parties were there,
because there were like three or four other ones at
the same time, just carnage. Kids jumping off tables on
their mates and the poor staff there. Now, at the time,
you don't even care about the staff. Now, the poor staff,
(09:44):
they must be still traumatized. Teenagers just earning basic income,
working at those Saturdays, doing the kids parties there. Patsy,
tell me the decade you were a kid in without
telling me the decade.
Speaker 4 (09:55):
Yes, I learnt how to record Charlie's Angels off the
telly for my mum.
Speaker 3 (09:59):
For your mum.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
I tell you what, it was hard to record TV
back in the day. Wasn't it easy? Do you remember
the thing called Video Plus came along, Pat?
Speaker 3 (10:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
Where in the TV Guide, every single TV show had some,
I don't know, a 22-digit code. What? And you were
supposed to tap that in using your remote control. Pray
to the TV gods that the snooker would record for
your dad. That was at like 1am.
Speaker 3 (10:24):
This was to record the TV. And then what does
it record it onto?
Speaker 1 (10:27):
Those big old VHS cassettes that were massive.
Speaker 4 (10:31):
Like the size of an A4 sheet of paper.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
They were huge, weren't they?
Speaker 3 (10:34):
So would you just have like heaps and heaps?
Speaker 1 (10:36):
It rarely worked. If you're recording TV, because these would change.
Sometimes if the sport overran or there was a late news,
the ending of Dallas would just stop recording. Yeah. Someone's
about to shoot Jay. Oh, go, mum, mum! We still
don't know who shot Jay. The recording has just ended.
(11:00):
Tell us a decade you were a kid in without
telling us a decade. Ria, what would it be for you?
Speaker 6 (11:05):
For me, the height of cool was wearing a shirt
over a shirt over another shirt.
Speaker 1 (11:11):
What? When was this a thing?
Speaker 3 (11:13):
This was in the 2000s.
Speaker 6 (11:15):
What was really cool was polo shirt. Then on top
of the polo shirt, long sleeve shirt, sleeves rolled up
so forearms still exposed.
Speaker 3 (11:24):
Then on top of that, a button up.
Speaker 2 (11:26):
So many layers.
Speaker 1 (11:26):
Not buttoned up.
Speaker 6 (11:27):
Yes, and then also to top it all off, a
belt with way too much slack.
Speaker 3 (11:32):
So you know those skinny sort of like silver belts?
Speaker 1 (11:33):
Oh, I remember, yeah, like crisscross, going to make you jump, jump, jump.
Speaker 3 (11:37):
And having it sort of dangling as low as possible.
Speaker 6 (11:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:39):
Do you remember wallet chains? Yes. I used to have
one of those. Oh, I can see it. Early 2000s.
Speaker 3 (11:46):
Yeah, a Velcro wallet as well.
Speaker 1 (11:48):
No, no, leather one. Oh, leather wallet and wallet chain.
Even worse, even worse.
Speaker 4 (11:53):
Yucky.
Speaker 1 (11:53):
I cringe. I saw a proper photo of one, like
a proper tangible photo.
Speaker 4 (11:59):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:59):
Because obviously no iPhones. This is not only 2000s. And
I'll be honest, I've been there.
Speaker 3 (12:03):
Yeah, no, that's smart.
Speaker 1 (12:04):
I sifted away, like pumped it off like David Blaine
doing close-up magic. And ain't no magic in that card.
It was like, oh, nasty. What was I thinking?
Speaker 3 (12:11):
Oh, yeah, different time.
Speaker 1 (12:13):
All right. Tell us the decade you were a kid
in without telling us the decade. Lizzie, dad cooking up
home-brewed beer. Oh, my God. Yeah, my dad used to
make homebrew beer. And I remember he went out once,
and this is when I was 16. I didn't realize
that to brew beer, it's an active process. It's brewing.
It's not just beer. So I thought, I said to
(12:34):
my ex, come around. My dad's just got this beer
under the stairs. We learned a very painful lesson about
the ancient art of brewing. Not properly brewed beer. Everyone
was very violent. Oh, no. I was just starting to
sweat now. The trauma. I had to ring my dad.
You know, and he was gone out for dinner with
my mum. I had to ring the landline. Come home,
(12:56):
I don't feel very well. What have you drunk? Your beer.
He goes, it's not even ready yet. That's just poison
at that point. Yeah, it was quite bad, actually. So homebrew, yeah,
I've got bad vibes with that one. David Richards telling
us what decade he was a kid in without telling
us a decade. Wings were high on the charts.
Speaker 2 (13:15):
Tune.
Speaker 1 (13:19):
Felisa, Family Ties. Not needed, not needed, not needed. No,
if you're going to do that, it stops. Janelle, watching
Prince Charles and Lady Di get married on the TV. Now,
I'm about to play you some of it now. And
I think Patsy must have recorded this from her tape
(13:41):
recording from the TV at the time. Let me just
press play.
Speaker 6 (13:44):
Hi, Diana Francis.
Speaker 2 (13:46):
Take thee, Charles Philip Arthur George.
Speaker 4 (13:49):
Take thee, Philip Charles Arthur George.
Speaker 2 (13:52):
To my wedded husband.
Speaker 6 (13:54):
To my wedded husband.
Speaker 1 (13:55):
Isn't it incredible? Just listen to that story. It takes
me back to, because I remember watching that on TV,
but just how much has changed.
Speaker 6 (14:01):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (14:01):
For them and us.
Speaker 4 (14:03):
That was so huge because it was on here about midnight.
Speaker 1 (14:06):
Yeah, it would have been late for you guys.
Speaker 4 (14:07):
Yeah, so we were allowed to, you know, stay up
and watch it.
Speaker 1 (14:11):
So that would have been late midnight Saturday night, wouldn't it?
Because it was like Saturday afternoon in the UK.
Speaker 4 (14:14):
Yeah, yeah. And it was just the intrigue of it
all of like, this is live and it's happening over
the other side of the world and it's this podcast. princess.
It was like all your fairy tales.
Speaker 1 (14:24):
I think it's still in the top five biggest global
events in terms of watching something on TV. Oh, the audience, yeah. Yeah,
this is obviously before streaming and sort of, you know,
that was many decades before that. It was absolutely messy
and I still, you know, you only remember certain bits
of it. I just remember the size of her Is
it train? It's called that long bit in the back
of the dress?
Speaker 3 (14:42):
Oh, the big, yeah, it keeps going and going.
Speaker 1 (14:45):
Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was just huge. I didn't remember
the designer's name. They kept it, you know, because obviously
I love David Emanuel. Oh, wow. The designer here. I've
been working on this for two years.
Speaker 4 (14:54):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (14:54):
David Emanuel, the designer here. I met David Emanuel. Did you?
And I swear to God, he went, I'm David Emanuel.
And he went, I designed Lady Di's dress. I went, mate,
that was like 32 years ago. Hopefully you've knocked him
a few more bits of clothing. But what a great
one-hit wonder. If you're going to do it right.
Speaker 4 (15:12):
But it was a whole production leading up to the
actual ceremony here on telly. I remember they crossed to
the silkworm farm that had spun the silk.
Speaker 1 (15:23):
For the dress. I remember seeing that as well.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
Do you remember that?
Speaker 1 (15:25):
Honestly, there was so much feeling going on.
Speaker 7 (15:28):
Oh, I guess you got a lot of time interviewing
the silkworms that had to die.
Speaker 4 (15:32):
Every single element was, and I remember it so well.
Speaker 3 (15:35):
I can't believe I missed it. I missed the silkworms.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
The Christian O'Connell Show podcast.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
Now, what has gone on between you two? There's tension
in the air.
Speaker 4 (15:45):
I don't believe it's spoken to him today.
Speaker 1 (15:46):
What's going on, Rios? No, I know, but again, that's
the tension.
Speaker 3 (15:48):
That's exactly why.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
The silent treatment, Pats, is not a normal day.
Speaker 6 (15:51):
Pats, we have to acknowledge this and then we can
move on with the show.
Speaker 4 (15:57):
Oh, there's a funk in the air.
Speaker 1 (15:58):
Yeah, but the fact that you don't understand that, but
I guess.
Speaker 7 (16:01):
Hannibal Lecter didn't think you had a problem eating people,
otherwise you would behave like that. I'm not saying you're
Hannibal Lecter, but I'm saying you're Hannibal Patsy.
Speaker 4 (16:10):
That's nice.
Speaker 1 (16:11):
Well, I just wanted you two to clear the air
so we can move on together.
Speaker 4 (16:13):
Come lay on my couch and explain what is the problem.
Speaker 3 (16:16):
We need to, we need to, Patsy.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
Okay.
Speaker 6 (16:18):
I was going to leave yesterday. We're standing in the
hallway and it's a very narrow hallway.
Speaker 1 (16:23):
Oh, the one down here.
Speaker 6 (16:24):
The one just down here. Patsy and I, we love
a little gossip. So we were having a little gossip
before we both left.
Speaker 1 (16:30):
Gossip or what Patsy really loves is bitching.
Speaker 3 (16:33):
Was it gossip or was it fiction?
Speaker 1 (16:36):
It was gossip. It was gossip.
Speaker 2 (16:39):
It was just.
Speaker 3 (16:40):
Your standard gossip.
Speaker 1 (16:40):
Because there's often an edge to it, yeah.
Speaker 3 (16:44):
Not to be disgusting, but gossip, gossip. Just normal workplace gossip.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
Oh, if you could talk about it here. What a
show we have. Hell of a show. Oh, we call
it cleaning out the closet. Cue up the Eminem song.
So you're having a gossip slash bitch, yeah? You might
tell it what I hate. Oh, stop. Oh, I love you. Oh, stop.
Speaker 4 (17:04):
Great job today. You're not painting me correctly at all.
Speaker 1 (17:07):
No, sorry.
Speaker 4 (17:08):
But do mention I was laden with about two handbags,
my computer bag.
Speaker 6 (17:14):
Your hands were full and then we were standing face
to face and we both go to go different directions
in the hallway and there is a grazing of our
bodies and Where?
Speaker 1 (17:26):
Show me on this doll where you got grazed by pass.
Speaker 2 (17:28):
Oh, stop.
Speaker 3 (17:30):
Below my hips.
Speaker 1 (17:32):
Oh, no.
Speaker 3 (17:32):
My belt region.
Speaker 4 (17:34):
It was more like a good damn whack on the na-na-na.
Speaker 1 (17:38):
And then it just. You gave him a tap on
the ass.
Speaker 2 (17:41):
No.
Speaker 3 (17:41):
The other side.
Speaker 4 (17:42):
I accidentally, as I was swinging around, my bag whacked
him in the groin.
Speaker 2 (17:49):
The Christian O'Connell Show podcast.
Speaker 3 (17:51):
For like three seconds, though, no one said anything. We're
just sitting there in silence. And then she goes, I
touched you.
Speaker 1 (17:58):
And I was like, yep. Yep. Where do you go forward?
Speaker 3 (18:03):
We just left in silence.
Speaker 4 (18:05):
I felt awful.
Speaker 1 (18:05):
One of you should have immediately taken the rest of
the week off and then just start a brand new
week and no one ever talks about it ever again.
The fact that you're back here just a mere hours
later after that incident.
Speaker 3 (18:19):
I haven't spoken to her until.
Speaker 4 (18:20):
This very moment. You didn't know where to look and.
Speaker 1 (18:24):
I felt awful.
Speaker 4 (18:24):
I felt dreadful. Because I said, was that your.
Speaker 7 (18:27):
Oh, my, you don't ask it. That's what makes it work,
because you just don't... In that situation, there's only.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
One thing to do. You don't even talk about it.
You don't even say sorry. You just seem to say, goodbye, Connie.
See you again tomorrow at the office. Bye-bye. You don't
talk about it. You certainly don't ask questions like, was
that your.
Speaker 3 (18:44):
No, well, I felt very awkward.
Speaker 1 (18:46):
You know it either was or it wasn't. There's no mystery.
Speaker 3 (18:48):
It was, and it clearly was. Actually, I believe your
parting words to me as she let down the ramp was.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
Say nothing about this to HR.
Speaker 3 (18:55):
She literally goes... Don't tell HR.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
Oh, my God.
Speaker 4 (19:01):
I'm sorry, but it's just when you're in a tight,
confined space.
Speaker 3 (19:04):
It wasn't your fault.
Speaker 4 (19:05):
No, it wasn't, in my defence, Your Honour. But you
kind of went a little green in the complexion.
Speaker 1 (19:12):
Yes, yeah. And I thought, oh.
Speaker 3 (19:14):
I've never had that situation at work before.
Speaker 1 (19:16):
No. It was a new ground. No, and that's a
good thing to say. Okay, well, listen, guys. Are we
all okay? Everyone's all right? Well, I am, but are you, Rio?
An accidental... Yes.
Speaker 4 (19:28):
Encounter.
Speaker 1 (19:29):
Accidental grazing. And that's going to happen in a small space. Exactly.
So from now on, one of you just needs to
leave a minute before the other person.
Speaker 5 (19:37):
Yeah, true.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
So this can never happen again.
Speaker 2 (19:38):
Yes, true.
Speaker 1 (19:38):
We can't have a repeated occurrence of this, okay? I'm
glad we cleared that up, guys, okay?
Speaker 2 (19:43):
The Christian O'Connell Show podcast.
Speaker 1 (19:46):
Your kids are never too old to have a meltdown.
Our eldest daughter, Ruby... she's had her eyes on some
big oversized sort of trench coat car coat by ladies.
And so I said, look, I'll meet you. You try
it on, and then if you like it, maybe I'll
buy it for you, okay? So I meet her yesterday.
She's really keen for me to come and see this jacket, okay?
(20:08):
So I get there. You know, I hightailed it out
of here yesterday. Did the show meeting. I was there
at 10 o'clock. The store is opening. There's no one
else there. We go in, and within 10 minutes... She's
having a meltdown in there. And we are having a
kind of argument. Oh, no. It's not really a proper argument,
but she's having a meltdown. We've all been this. You
know when you've really set your heart on something for
(20:28):
like a week or two? I'm going to get that.
You imagine who you're going to be in that.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
Yes, yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:32):
I'll be a whole new person. Whole new person. Whole
new world of possibilities opening up. Right? And then it just,
you know when you put it on, you try and
convince yourself. Yes, yes.
Speaker 3 (20:43):
Maybe it's actually better.
Speaker 1 (20:44):
It's the style.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
Yeah, yes.
Speaker 1 (20:46):
This was that scene yesterday. Oh, Oh, God. I so
wanted that jacket to be right. So it was just
way too big.
Speaker 3 (20:54):
Right.
Speaker 1 (20:55):
Voluminous, right? So we put on small, and it's too
big for her. And I go, don't worry, I think
they do it, it's oversized anyway, they do an extra small.
I'll go and find it, okay? She tries on the
extra small, and I start to get giggles, because it's like,
she keeps looking at herself in the mirror, and she
knows what's not there. Yes, yes. But she's still flickering
between that. Yes, yes. In terms of the image she
(21:17):
thought she was going to have in it. And I
hadn't even said anything. And I was really trying to
hold back words. I was hoping that she'd arrive at
her own decision. This ain't the jacket for you. She doesn't.
So I go, hey, listen, you're the leader of the
French resistance. That's not helpful. What time are the Normandy landings?
(21:38):
You're being very mean now. We both know. I said, listen,
I want you to have a really nice jacket. But
I said, this thing's huge. I said, right, for starters,
you can't drive the car in that. She goes, no,
I know. All right, so you're never driving anywhere in it.
You've got to fold it up 87 times. That's the
sort of thing they could put people in that and
get them off the Titanic.
Speaker 4 (21:59):
It's huge.
Speaker 7 (22:01):
And I said, I can't even see your fingertips.
Speaker 3 (22:03):
Oh, no, she looks like she's wearing her dad's jacket.
Speaker 1 (22:06):
It actually looks like you've got my jacket on. I said,
it's actually 99% jacket, 1% rubes.
Speaker 6 (22:14):
It's very brave of you to take the leap and
say that because she is actually deep down looking for
someone to tell her not to get it.
Speaker 3 (22:21):
But it's hard to be the deliverer.
Speaker 1 (22:22):
Then she was doing that thing, and it's one of
my favourite things, the kids now the age as they're out,
where she was mad laughing. That's as good as it
gets now. That's as good as it gets.
Speaker 2 (22:33):
The Christian O'Connell Show.
Speaker 5 (22:35):
Go on.
Speaker 1 (22:36):
Podcast. Yesterday on the show, we were taking you back
to your teenage bedrooms and asking what were the posters
on the wall. And I got this message towards the
end of it from Chantelle. Christian, we were never allowed
to have posters or anything on our walls because the
blue tack or sticky tape might take the paint off.
So I thought today we do this. Not in this house.
(22:57):
They're normally fatwas and rulings handed down by mum. Dad,
but mainly mum in my house. It was mainly mum.
So it would change from house to house. But I
want to know, what were you banned from in your house? Jen. Christian,
this is an out. I've never heard this one. Jen
Evans wasn't allowed to sit on her bed. because it
would leave a bum imprint on the bedding and make
(23:19):
it look messy. What? Where did you live?
Speaker 2 (23:23):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (23:23):
Buckingham Palace?
Speaker 1 (23:24):
Yes. I also had to eat chisels with a spoon. Oh, no.
So I didn't get dirty fingers. Oh, that's crazy. Who
are you raised by? Hyacinth Bouquet?
Speaker 4 (23:34):
That's a rite of passage with chisels. You put one
on each finger. Eat them off the fingers.
Speaker 6 (23:39):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (23:41):
Yeah, that's going to take some beating, both of those.
But I had to eat measles with a spoon, so
I didn't get that. It's that finger taint. It's exactly that.
The yellow-orange finger taint. Jen, not being able to sit
in your own bed because it might leave a bum imprint.
Who's inspecting the flipping bed? You're not in prison. Nicole
wasn't allowed to watch Simpsons as a kid. Leslie wasn't
(24:03):
allowed to watch Gilligan's Island. We were told by our
dad it was an insult to one's intelligence.
Speaker 2 (24:09):
Oh!
Speaker 1 (24:10):
However, he had no problem with us watching Benny Hill.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
High art.
Speaker 1 (24:19):
Kirsty, I wasn't allowed to watch the movie Fatal Attraction.
Danielle Cook, we weren't allowed red or green cordial in
the house because mum said it made kids hyper. Anything
that brought on too much joy was bad by our
mums and dads, wasn't it? Anything that's going to make
you just too much.
Speaker 3 (24:40):
Yeah, anything happy.
Speaker 1 (24:41):
Vicky, we weren't allowed anything green or any elephant figurines.
Dad was very superstitious. Now, I thought, because I've been
to Thailand a couple of times, I thought, because I've
got a little elephant figurine I brought to Thailand. Well,
I haven't had a lot of bad luck the last
12 months. Is it my fault? I thought elephants were
good luck.
Speaker 4 (24:59):
Well, the trunk has to be up. If the trunk's up,
it's good luck. If the trunk's down.
Speaker 1 (25:04):
It's down.
Speaker 2 (25:05):
Oh, no, no, no.
Speaker 4 (25:06):
You've got to get rid of that. What are you doing?
That's bad.
Speaker 1 (25:10):
Can I turn it upside down?
Speaker 5 (25:11):
No.
Speaker 4 (25:12):
No, trunk must be up.
Speaker 1 (25:13):
Are you sure? What's that based on?
Speaker 4 (25:15):
Or your feng shui will be way out of line.
Speaker 1 (25:17):
I thought it was if they were facing a certain
way as well, the elephants.
Speaker 4 (25:21):
Maybe, but definitely the trunk is a big factor.
Speaker 3 (25:24):
Christian, Christian, Christian.
Speaker 1 (25:25):
Tomorrow, tell you who can win on the show? My
unlucky elephant figurine. Who wants a curse on them? Patsy,
what's it for you? Is there anything you, as a
mum now, is there anything you've banned in your house?
Speaker 4 (25:36):
Absolutely there is.
Speaker 1 (25:37):
Yeah, joy.
Speaker 4 (25:37):
And it's slime. No, it is slime. Because we persisted.
She went through a big stage, probably at about, I'd say,
from eight to ten, where it was all about the
slime and she'd have glitter in the slime.
Speaker 2 (25:50):
So what?
Speaker 4 (25:51):
Oh, no.
Speaker 1 (25:52):
And you were like judging that mum that makes a
kid eat cheeses with a spoon. That's you, Bats.
Speaker 4 (25:57):
No, well, it got on the carpet and it's still
in the carpet and the carpet was new at the time.
So you just can't get it out.
Speaker 1 (26:05):
Not in this house, Audie. Not in this house.
Speaker 4 (26:08):
If you want to do slime, you've got to go
in the backyard.
Speaker 1 (26:10):
You're going to get it on the carpets over the
next couple of years. I can't believe it. I see
my kids still doing it. It drives me nuts. They
start doing their nail varnish. And they put the open,
the little bottle. With the lid off and just on
the carpet. Yeah. And the carpet's not a smooth surface.
And I'm like, oh, my God, please don't actually approach
(26:30):
it like it's a grenade. I'm like, stay. Don't even move.
Don't even move. I'll get to it. And just take
that away for you, Missy. Thank you.
Speaker 4 (26:39):
Not with that shag pile you've got at your place.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Oh, my God. You know, we love that 17 shag pile,
you know. Ria, was this it for you? What was
banned in your house?
Speaker 6 (26:47):
We were not allowed to have any video games in
the house. There was a fatwa on.
Speaker 3 (26:51):
All video games.
Speaker 1 (26:52):
You see, I think that's a good one.
Speaker 6 (26:53):
Well, I mean, then I'd go over to like other kids'
house and I wouldn't be able to play any video
games because I was useless. The only ones we were
allowed were Mario touch typing. Which was a computer game
that teaches you how to touch type. And another game
called Leonardo the Inventor, which was a historical game where
(27:16):
you would learn about the various historical inventions of Leonardo
da Vinci.
Speaker 1 (27:21):
The boys are all piling back to yours for that
one after school.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
The Christian O'Connell Show podcast.
Speaker 1 (27:28):
Not in my house. What were you denied? What was
not allowed in your house when you were growing up?
You can text me 0475 031043. At the moment, our
favourite one is Young Jen Evans. Two parts to this.
Wasn't allowed to sit in her own bed because it
would leave a bum imprint in the bedding. I've never
heard of such a thing.
Speaker 3 (27:49):
God forbid.
Speaker 1 (27:49):
And looked messy. Teenage bedrooms are meant to look messy.
She also had to eat Cheezels with a spoon so
she didn't get that finger tamed. Some of these are incredible. Nicole, Christian,
we weren't allowed to stir our Neapolitan ice cream because
our parents denied the sound of the scraping of the
spoon and the bowls. That's from Nicole. What were they, monks?
(28:11):
It must be silence all the time in the Zen house. Santo,
as soon as my mum finished washing the dishes and
sink after dinner, we were not allowed to use any
glasses or cutlery for the rest of the night.
Speaker 3 (28:22):
Use your hands.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
I'm done for the day. I kind of get it, Santo. Damien,
we weren't allowed inside the house during daylight hours on
the weekend.
Speaker 5 (28:33):
What?
Speaker 1 (28:33):
I don't know what mum and dad were up to.
Speaker 3 (28:37):
Making some more Damien's.
Speaker 1 (28:37):
Yeah. You didn't want to be there during the day. Christian,
we weren't allowed to have McDonald's. That's from Ash. Christian,
we had a man that came round in a van
full of crates of soda. Everyone on our street bought
these bottles every week, but we were never allowed. All
we could hear was the clinking of the Joyce bottles,
but they were never delivered for us. That is heartbreaking.
Speaker 4 (28:59):
Yeah, the soft drink man. I remember that. We weren't allowed.
Speaker 1 (29:02):
And this person just messaged a couple of minutes later going,
I'm just chugging my first can of Coke of the day.
The pendulum's gone too far the other way now. I
know you can do it now. Christian, we had soft
drinks stored in the little bar fridge, but we were
never allowed to drink them because they were only for
special occasions. Then when we finally had a special occasion,
(29:24):
we weren't allowed to drink them because they were for
the adults. Do you remember just as a kid growing up,
this actually really annoys me, how much... referential treatment was
given the adults. Yes. Oh, no, no, that's the adults'
room in there. Oh, no, no, no, those glasses are
for the adults. No, that's the good China. That's the adults' room.
Now the kids have their entire disattachment. They can break
(29:46):
anything of yours.
Speaker 3 (29:46):
Yeah, inmates run the prison.
Speaker 1 (29:47):
A couple of weeks ago, I was looking for, I've
got this rare limited edition Led Zepp t-shirt, right? And
I was looking for it. And I couldn't find it.
I know I haven't lost that. I put it in
my family group chat. None of you have seen my
Led Zeppelin t-shirt. One of my daughters said when she
popped back home briefly the other day, she went into
my wardrobe And chuck it.
Speaker 3 (30:06):
That is.
Speaker 1 (30:07):
Just chuck it.
Speaker 3 (30:08):
That is a violation.
Speaker 1 (30:09):
Just chuck it. Don't I have any rights? No, none.
Speaker 2 (30:13):
The Christian O'Connell Show podcast.
Speaker 1 (30:16):
Okay, we're doing Signed You're an Adult. Christian, you know
when you're an adult, when the most exciting part of
a night out is getting home and going to bed.
This is me telling my daughters 22nd. They all went
on clubbing. I went home, put my trackie dacks on,
watched a terrible sports documentary, and I'm so happy. So happy.
Being in a nightclub? It's too loud. I can't even
have a conversation here. I don't even know what these
(30:38):
music is that these kids are playing these days. What's
that weird smell everywhere? Christian, signs you're an adult. This
is a brilliant one. Constantly wondering about how much milk
there is in the fridge. That's my wife and I.
That's sexting for us. Chris, how much milk have we
got in the fridge? Joining to buy a leech on
the way home. Chris, can you get some milk on
the way home? You would think we'd just live on milk.
(30:58):
Nothing else. That's a great one. Well done, Christian. I'm 24.
I don't own an iron. Oh, no. I use a
hair straightener. No way. This is the beginning of the
end of civilization. No.
Speaker 4 (31:12):
Oh, dear.
Speaker 1 (31:14):
Oh. Christian, we recently went on holiday to Japan. My
husband and I split up for the day. He purchased
a Pokemon merch, and I spent my money buying sushi
and fish-shaped sponges for our kitchen. Definitely signs. Well, one
of you's an adult. This is Cam.
Speaker 3 (31:31):
Cam.
Speaker 1 (31:31):
Christian, when you find the best car park at the
shopping centre, it's next to a place where people can't
park and damage your car. I know what you mean. Christian,
good morning. Signs you're an adult. Looking at calendar, seeing
there are no plans for this coming this weekend and
getting very excited about a weekend of planned nothing. That's
from Chris. Christian, signs you're an adult. When you find
(31:55):
a discussion about irons and ironing, unusually interesting. Interesting. Even,
dare I say, captivating. Hey, we exist to captivate.
iHeart Podcasts. Hear more gold podcasts, playlists, and listen live
on the free iHeart app. Got anything good?
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Hey, this is the Christian O'Connell Show Podcast.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
Spoil Dad This Father's Day with the Chemist Warehouse Fragrance Sale.
Speaker 3 (00:31):
Shop a huge range of big brand fragrances at the
lowest prices.
Speaker 1 (00:34):
Chemist Warehouse, helping you spoil dad this father's day. Hey,
pod squad. My new book, Unscript, The Radical Act of
Being Yourself, is now actually out, which actually means you
can buy online or in your good independent bookshops, and
also the audiobook, which is voiced by me, and also
you can get the Kindle as well. So please, As
(00:54):
you're reading it in the book, you'll realize I've got
my personal email in there. Please let me know how
you get on with it as well. I hope you
really enjoy it. Please check it out. Unscript, The Radical
Act of Being Yourself. And now today's show. Enjoy.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
The Christian O'Connell Show podcast.
Speaker 1 (01:13):
Patsy, please tell us about the thing that you ordered
that is not what you ordered.
Speaker 4 (01:17):
Don't you hate it when you're really pumped for something,
like you're really looking for it? You make an online
purchase and you think, this is going to be so good.
Speaker 1 (01:25):
This is me virtually every week where I think, oh,
my God, my life is going to be better. You
open it up and you're like, oh, my God. I know.
Speaker 4 (01:32):
This is what happened to me. So my podcast, Rage
Against the Menopause, I just thought it would be really
good for the videos this season if I had specially
designed microphone poppers, which is the foam that goes over.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
Branding.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
You know. Mr Beast can't do it all. I'm not
saying you're Mrs Beast. I'm just saying his production values
are high level. You all right?
Speaker 5 (01:58):
Anyway, I saw these.
Speaker 4 (02:00):
Just, you know, like in the algorithm sort of popped up,
you know, get your own microphone.
Speaker 3 (02:05):
I've never had that.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
Weird, isn't it? So niche.
Speaker 3 (02:09):
Really weird.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
KSI, you and the Logans. I mean, how many of
those days? About eight a year? Bespoke microphone covers.
Speaker 4 (02:18):
That was weird.
Speaker 1 (02:19):
I've never seen that come up in the algorithm.
Speaker 4 (02:20):
You could get mugs and all sorts in the hotel.
My covers look really good. I'll order a couple of those.
Speaker 1 (02:25):
Yeah, because we've got them. I'm talking into one right now.
It's just the name of the show, the Christian O'Connell show.
They look nice. You're right. I'm on the video now.
They look good.
Speaker 3 (02:33):
Yeah, it's really good branding.
Speaker 1 (02:34):
So what have you got, Rage Against the Menopause ones?
Speaker 4 (02:35):
Yeah, so it's just like the tile that you would
see if you bring up the iHeart app and you
see there's my podcast.
Speaker 3 (02:42):
It's a photo of me.
Speaker 1 (02:42):
Oh, so it's like your face?
Speaker 3 (02:43):
Yeah, it's just like my logo.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
I've never seen them with the host's face on. So
you go from face to face.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
Face here, face there. Wow. I love it. I've never
seen that before.
Speaker 4 (02:58):
Anyway, they've come.
Speaker 1 (02:59):
I'll let Howard Stern and all the other big DJs know, guys,
we've been getting it wrong. It's not your name. You're
talking to your own face.
Speaker 6 (03:05):
I often think that when I'm looking at you, it's like,
it's not enough Christian face.
Speaker 1 (03:09):
I need a bit more Christian. So how about a
face on this?
Speaker 4 (03:12):
Wall-to-wall Christian.
Speaker 1 (03:14):
And then also might as well get some T-shirts with
my own face on as well. So Patsy on a T-shirt,
on the mic cover, on screen.
Speaker 4 (03:20):
Everywhere you look.
Speaker 1 (03:21):
Double threat.
Speaker 4 (03:22):
Anyway, they've come, but they're like ridiculously small.
Speaker 1 (03:26):
They're like a thimble.
Speaker 4 (03:27):
They're like a thimble size.
Speaker 1 (03:29):
Rio's got one.
Speaker 5 (03:29):
Mic socks.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
I've just seen it's tiny.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
It's ridiculous.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
It's like a beef eater's hat for a mouse. It's small.
The Meister, Gard, Buckingham Palace would wear that on top
of their heads.
Speaker 3 (03:41):
It's for a toy kid's microphone. It really is.
Speaker 4 (03:44):
Yeah, like a Fisher, you know, price little plastic.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
You know what that whiff's of? Yes. Do you order these?
It wasn't.
Speaker 4 (03:52):
It actually wasn't.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
It whips of Timu.
Speaker 4 (03:54):
No, I've never ordered on Timu.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
Straight off a boat from China. No. No, it's all flaky.
Speaker 3 (03:59):
It's sort of stretched as well.
Speaker 1 (04:01):
It's terrible.
Speaker 3 (04:02):
It is awful.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
It says very cheaply done.
Speaker 6 (04:03):
The A and the I in against are sort of
squished over, so it's just rage against the menopause.
Speaker 1 (04:08):
Asian against the menopause.
Speaker 4 (04:09):
It's not even square.
Speaker 3 (04:11):
The square isn't square.
Speaker 1 (04:12):
Big market, actually. Maybe rebrand it.
Speaker 4 (04:14):
30 bucks, I'd play a page for this.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
But then the visual doesn't match up the title of
the show. She's not Asian at all. She's a fake Asian.
Speaker 4 (04:22):
But I paid 15 bucks each, and it is the
worst 30 bucks I've ever spent.
Speaker 1 (04:26):
I'm not joking. I could draw you better than that. No.
Speaker 4 (04:29):
It is awful.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
I wouldn't pay $ 1.
Speaker 5 (04:33):
50.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
No, seriously, Pat, you would be 15 bucks each.
Speaker 4 (04:36):
Yes, and they took like six weeks to get here.
Speaker 7 (04:39):
Yeah, that's because like five Norweys are then laughing at
who would want such a thing.
Speaker 1 (04:44):
Yeah. So that is a massive amount. How many have
you got of them?
Speaker 4 (04:51):
Just two. One for me, one for the guest.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
The guest is going to be opposite you, looking at you,
talking into your face. It's the scariest show ever.
Speaker 4 (05:01):
Aren't they awful? 30 bucks down the drain.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
No, no, no.
Speaker 1 (05:07):
We're going to give them away this week on the show.
These are the star prizes, Pats.
Speaker 4 (05:11):
I love it.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
The Christian O'Connell Show podcast.
Speaker 1 (05:15):
That's not what I ordered. We've all done what Patsy's done.
You get very excited about ordering something online. You're counting down.
It arrives. You open it up. Oh, God. That's not
what I ordered. It's too big. It's too small. It's
too crap. Bizarrely, my recent one that arrived last week
from America, I opened it up and my wife said,
my God, what the hell have you ordered? I hear
(05:36):
this a lot in my house. She goes, oh, my God,
it looks so bad. What is it? I said, it's
a microphone lamp.
Speaker 6 (05:45):
Oh, no, Christian O'Connell.
Speaker 4 (05:48):
What do you mean, like a ring light?
Speaker 1 (05:50):
No, no, no, no. This is a lamp that looks
exactly like one of those old steel microphones, like an old-fashioned.
Because you work in radio.
Speaker 6 (06:00):
I work in radio.
Speaker 4 (06:01):
Oh, and it's a lamp.
Speaker 1 (06:03):
Yeah. That's so adorable.
Speaker 3 (06:05):
That's like having that, like, yeah, Patsy has that. Sorry, Patsy,
no offense, but your on-ear sign. Yeah, I love it.
Speaker 4 (06:10):
You two are just as bad as each other. In
the house.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
This lamp, right. Not what I ordered. It just looks terrible.
Not just that, it doesn't work. So I didn't realize,
because it's from America, it's got like an American plug.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
Oh, yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
So I go out and buy an adapter. I plug
it in. It short-circuits the entire house.
Speaker 4 (06:28):
Oh, no.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Sweats of God. You just heard this, and everything went off.
The fridge has gone off. I had a freezer. What
is it? I went, microphone lamp.
Speaker 3 (06:37):
Oh, no. It's so bad. I need to see it.
Speaker 1 (06:41):
Someone can have it. You can short-circuit your house with
this terrible bogan lamp that's a microphone lamp. And again,
I don't even know. You know when you're looking at it,
you go, I don't.
Speaker 3 (06:52):
Know what to order this for.
Speaker 1 (06:54):
Were you drunk? No, I was sober, which is sadder
in a way. Sadder in a way. Christian, my brother-in-law
bought a frying pan from Amazon. He was so excited
to cook steaks on it. He was pumped. It rocked up,
could barely fit half an egg on it. He was crushed. Lorraine,
that's not what I ordered. Good morning, Lorraine. What is
it for you?
Speaker 5 (07:14):
I got tea mood.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
I got tea mood.
Speaker 7 (07:17):
It's because it gets so bloody cheap on there.
Speaker 5 (07:20):
Well, most things I've ordered were really good, but this
time I actually ordered a pack of 10 kitchen tea towels.
And when they arrived, they were the size of a
face washer.
Speaker 1 (07:34):
Like a child's potens or tea ceremony.
Speaker 5 (07:37):
So I came up with a solution. I work in
a pub. So I took them to work and I
got my money back from work through Petit Cash and
we used them to polish glasses.
Speaker 1 (07:47):
Yeah, you could polish, you're right, polish the bar top.
Use them as coasters for the beers.
Speaker 6 (07:55):
We actually, we don't have tea towels at our work
anymore because everyone kept stealing them because we had really
nice tea towels.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
I took one home. I took one home. No, they're
like pro grade. They're really thick. Yeah, the ones I've
got are really like, they're too porous. So yeah, that
one here, I took one home. It's a beautiful tea towel. Yeah,
the green and white ones. That's why we don't have
any anymore. That's good, but they're very nice. Tell us
the decade you were a kid in without telling us
(08:25):
the decade. So for me, telling you the decade I
was a kid in without actually telling you the decade,
children's parties at McDonald's.
Speaker 5 (08:34):
Oh.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
Good times.
Speaker 3 (08:36):
What did you guys have in England?
Speaker 1 (08:37):
And it was like Ronald then was in charge. Yes.
He was the CEO. Ronald McDonald. Sort of dropped off
a bit, hasn't he? Yeah, rightly so. Rightly so. Scary-ass
clown man, really.
Speaker 4 (08:46):
And Hamburglar.
Speaker 1 (08:48):
Hamburglar, yes. I forgot about Hamburglar.
Speaker 4 (08:50):
There's a few of them.
Speaker 1 (08:51):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (08:52):
Yeah, bring them back.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
It used to be like you got so excited if
a mate of yours was having their birthday party at McDonald's. Yes.
It was the best place. When you were like 8, 9, 10,
it was the best place. And it was also when
It was like the first sort of thing of like
having America in the high street. Right. Now it's too much.
We want them to go back home. But then it
was like, it was a novelty. It was only really them.
And then Burger King came in as well. But it
(09:15):
was first, it was McDonald's.
Speaker 6 (09:16):
And did you guys have the play centres like we
do in Australia? So you've got the Maccas and then you've.
Speaker 3 (09:21):
Got the ball pit.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Yes.
Speaker 4 (09:22):
Awesome places.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
Yeah, they were massive. Just look back now. Now, you know,
if it's too noisy anywhere, I have to leave. But
then at the time when those kids parties were there,
because there were like three or four other ones at
the same time, just carnage. Kids jumping off tables on
their mates and the poor staff there. Now, at the time,
you don't even care about the staff. Now, the poor staff,
(09:44):
they must be still traumatized. Teenagers just earning basic income,
working at those Saturdays, doing the kids parties there. Patsy,
tell me the decade you were a kid in without
telling me the decade.
Speaker 4 (09:55):
Yes, I learnt how to record Charlie's Angels off the
telly for my mum.
Speaker 3 (09:59):
For your mum.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
I tell you what, it was hard to record TV
back in the day. Wasn't it easy? Do you remember
the thing called Video Plus came along, Pat?
Speaker 3 (10:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
Where in the TV Guide, every single TV show had some,
I don't know, a 22-digit code. What? And you were
supposed to tap that in using your remote control. Pray
to the TV gods that the snooker would record for
your dad. That was at like 1am.
Speaker 3 (10:24):
This was to record the TV. And then what does
it record it onto?
Speaker 1 (10:27):
Those big old VHS cassettes that were massive.
Speaker 4 (10:31):
Like the size of an A4 sheet of paper.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
They were huge, weren't they?
Speaker 3 (10:34):
So would you just have like heaps and heaps?
Speaker 1 (10:36):
It rarely worked. If you're recording TV, because these would change.
Sometimes if the sport overran or there was a late news,
the ending of Dallas would just stop recording. Yeah. Someone's
about to shoot Jay. Oh, go, mum, mum! We still
don't know who shot Jay. The recording has just ended.
(11:00):
Tell us a decade you were a kid in without
telling us a decade. Ria, what would it be for you?
Speaker 6 (11:05):
For me, the height of cool was wearing a shirt
over a shirt over another shirt.
Speaker 1 (11:11):
What? When was this a thing?
Speaker 3 (11:13):
This was in the 2000s.
Speaker 6 (11:15):
What was really cool was polo shirt. Then on top
of the polo shirt, long sleeve shirt, sleeves rolled up
so forearms still exposed.
Speaker 3 (11:24):
Then on top of that, a button up.
Speaker 2 (11:26):
So many layers.
Speaker 1 (11:26):
Not buttoned up.
Speaker 6 (11:27):
Yes, and then also to top it all off, a
belt with way too much slack.
Speaker 3 (11:32):
So you know those skinny sort of like silver belts?
Speaker 1 (11:33):
Oh, I remember, yeah, like crisscross, going to make you jump, jump, jump.
Speaker 3 (11:37):
And having it sort of dangling as low as possible.
Speaker 6 (11:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:39):
Do you remember wallet chains? Yes. I used to have
one of those. Oh, I can see it. Early 2000s.
Speaker 3 (11:46):
Yeah, a Velcro wallet as well.
Speaker 1 (11:48):
No, no, leather one. Oh, leather wallet and wallet chain.
Even worse, even worse.
Speaker 4 (11:53):
Yucky.
Speaker 1 (11:53):
I cringe. I saw a proper photo of one, like
a proper tangible photo.
Speaker 4 (11:59):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:59):
Because obviously no iPhones. This is not only 2000s. And
I'll be honest, I've been there.
Speaker 3 (12:03):
Yeah, no, that's smart.
Speaker 1 (12:04):
I sifted away, like pumped it off like David Blaine
doing close-up magic. And ain't no magic in that card.
It was like, oh, nasty. What was I thinking?
Speaker 3 (12:11):
Oh, yeah, different time.
Speaker 1 (12:13):
All right. Tell us the decade you were a kid
in without telling us the decade. Lizzie, dad cooking up
home-brewed beer. Oh, my God. Yeah, my dad used to
make homebrew beer. And I remember he went out once,
and this is when I was 16. I didn't realize
that to brew beer, it's an active process. It's brewing.
It's not just beer. So I thought, I said to
(12:34):
my ex, come around. My dad's just got this beer
under the stairs. We learned a very painful lesson about
the ancient art of brewing. Not properly brewed beer. Everyone
was very violent. Oh, no. I was just starting to
sweat now. The trauma. I had to ring my dad.
You know, and he was gone out for dinner with
my mum. I had to ring the landline. Come home,
(12:56):
I don't feel very well. What have you drunk? Your beer.
He goes, it's not even ready yet. That's just poison
at that point. Yeah, it was quite bad, actually. So homebrew, yeah,
I've got bad vibes with that one. David Richards telling
us what decade he was a kid in without telling
us a decade. Wings were high on the charts.
Speaker 2 (13:15):
Tune.
Speaker 1 (13:19):
Felisa, Family Ties. Not needed, not needed, not needed. No,
if you're going to do that, it stops. Janelle, watching
Prince Charles and Lady Di get married on the TV. Now,
I'm about to play you some of it now. And
I think Patsy must have recorded this from her tape
(13:41):
recording from the TV at the time. Let me just
press play.
Speaker 6 (13:44):
Hi, Diana Francis.
Speaker 2 (13:46):
Take thee, Charles Philip Arthur George.
Speaker 4 (13:49):
Take thee, Philip Charles Arthur George.
Speaker 2 (13:52):
To my wedded husband.
Speaker 6 (13:54):
To my wedded husband.
Speaker 1 (13:55):
Isn't it incredible? Just listen to that story. It takes
me back to, because I remember watching that on TV,
but just how much has changed.
Speaker 6 (14:01):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (14:01):
For them and us.
Speaker 4 (14:03):
That was so huge because it was on here about midnight.
Speaker 1 (14:06):
Yeah, it would have been late for you guys.
Speaker 4 (14:07):
Yeah, so we were allowed to, you know, stay up
and watch it.
Speaker 1 (14:11):
So that would have been late midnight Saturday night, wouldn't it?
Because it was like Saturday afternoon in the UK.
Speaker 4 (14:14):
Yeah, yeah. And it was just the intrigue of it
all of like, this is live and it's happening over
the other side of the world and it's this podcast. princess.
It was like all your fairy tales.
Speaker 1 (14:24):
I think it's still in the top five biggest global
events in terms of watching something on TV. Oh, the audience, yeah. Yeah,
this is obviously before streaming and sort of, you know,
that was many decades before that. It was absolutely messy
and I still, you know, you only remember certain bits
of it. I just remember the size of her Is
it train? It's called that long bit in the back
of the dress?
Speaker 3 (14:42):
Oh, the big, yeah, it keeps going and going.
Speaker 1 (14:45):
Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was just huge. I didn't remember
the designer's name. They kept it, you know, because obviously
I love David Emanuel. Oh, wow. The designer here. I've
been working on this for two years.
Speaker 4 (14:54):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (14:54):
David Emanuel, the designer here. I met David Emanuel. Did you?
And I swear to God, he went, I'm David Emanuel.
And he went, I designed Lady Di's dress. I went, mate,
that was like 32 years ago. Hopefully you've knocked him
a few more bits of clothing. But what a great
one-hit wonder. If you're going to do it right.
Speaker 4 (15:12):
But it was a whole production leading up to the
actual ceremony here on telly. I remember they crossed to
the silkworm farm that had spun the silk.
Speaker 1 (15:23):
For the dress. I remember seeing that as well.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
Do you remember that?
Speaker 1 (15:25):
Honestly, there was so much feeling going on.
Speaker 7 (15:28):
Oh, I guess you got a lot of time interviewing
the silkworms that had to die.
Speaker 4 (15:32):
Every single element was, and I remember it so well.
Speaker 3 (15:35):
I can't believe I missed it. I missed the silkworms.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
The Christian O'Connell Show podcast.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
Now, what has gone on between you two? There's tension
in the air.
Speaker 4 (15:45):
I don't believe it's spoken to him today.
Speaker 1 (15:46):
What's going on, Rios? No, I know, but again, that's
the tension.
Speaker 3 (15:48):
That's exactly why.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
The silent treatment, Pats, is not a normal day.
Speaker 6 (15:51):
Pats, we have to acknowledge this and then we can
move on with the show.
Speaker 4 (15:57):
Oh, there's a funk in the air.
Speaker 1 (15:58):
Yeah, but the fact that you don't understand that, but
I guess.
Speaker 7 (16:01):
Hannibal Lecter didn't think you had a problem eating people,
otherwise you would behave like that. I'm not saying you're
Hannibal Lecter, but I'm saying you're Hannibal Patsy.
Speaker 4 (16:10):
That's nice.
Speaker 1 (16:11):
Well, I just wanted you two to clear the air
so we can move on together.
Speaker 4 (16:13):
Come lay on my couch and explain what is the problem.
Speaker 3 (16:16):
We need to, we need to, Patsy.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
Okay.
Speaker 6 (16:18):
I was going to leave yesterday. We're standing in the
hallway and it's a very narrow hallway.
Speaker 1 (16:23):
Oh, the one down here.
Speaker 6 (16:24):
The one just down here. Patsy and I, we love
a little gossip. So we were having a little gossip
before we both left.
Speaker 1 (16:30):
Gossip or what Patsy really loves is bitching.
Speaker 3 (16:33):
Was it gossip or was it fiction?
Speaker 1 (16:36):
It was gossip. It was gossip.
Speaker 2 (16:39):
It was just.
Speaker 3 (16:40):
Your standard gossip.
Speaker 1 (16:40):
Because there's often an edge to it, yeah.
Speaker 3 (16:44):
Not to be disgusting, but gossip, gossip. Just normal workplace gossip.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
Oh, if you could talk about it here. What a
show we have. Hell of a show. Oh, we call
it cleaning out the closet. Cue up the Eminem song.
So you're having a gossip slash bitch, yeah? You might
tell it what I hate. Oh, stop. Oh, I love you. Oh, stop.
Speaker 4 (17:04):
Great job today. You're not painting me correctly at all.
Speaker 1 (17:07):
No, sorry.
Speaker 4 (17:08):
But do mention I was laden with about two handbags,
my computer bag.
Speaker 6 (17:14):
Your hands were full and then we were standing face
to face and we both go to go different directions
in the hallway and there is a grazing of our
bodies and Where?
Speaker 1 (17:26):
Show me on this doll where you got grazed by pass.
Speaker 2 (17:28):
Oh, stop.
Speaker 3 (17:30):
Below my hips.
Speaker 1 (17:32):
Oh, no.
Speaker 3 (17:32):
My belt region.
Speaker 4 (17:34):
It was more like a good damn whack on the na-na-na.
Speaker 1 (17:38):
And then it just. You gave him a tap on
the ass.
Speaker 2 (17:41):
No.
Speaker 3 (17:41):
The other side.
Speaker 4 (17:42):
I accidentally, as I was swinging around, my bag whacked
him in the groin.
Speaker 2 (17:49):
The Christian O'Connell Show podcast.
Speaker 3 (17:51):
For like three seconds, though, no one said anything. We're
just sitting there in silence. And then she goes, I
touched you.
Speaker 1 (17:58):
And I was like, yep. Yep. Where do you go forward?
Speaker 3 (18:03):
We just left in silence.
Speaker 4 (18:05):
I felt awful.
Speaker 1 (18:05):
One of you should have immediately taken the rest of
the week off and then just start a brand new
week and no one ever talks about it ever again.
The fact that you're back here just a mere hours
later after that incident.
Speaker 3 (18:19):
I haven't spoken to her until.
Speaker 4 (18:20):
This very moment. You didn't know where to look and.
Speaker 1 (18:24):
I felt awful.
Speaker 4 (18:24):
I felt dreadful. Because I said, was that your.
Speaker 7 (18:27):
Oh, my, you don't ask it. That's what makes it work,
because you just don't... In that situation, there's only.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
One thing to do. You don't even talk about it.
You don't even say sorry. You just seem to say, goodbye, Connie.
See you again tomorrow at the office. Bye-bye. You don't
talk about it. You certainly don't ask questions like, was
that your.
Speaker 3 (18:44):
No, well, I felt very awkward.
Speaker 1 (18:46):
You know it either was or it wasn't. There's no mystery.
Speaker 3 (18:48):
It was, and it clearly was. Actually, I believe your
parting words to me as she let down the ramp was.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
Say nothing about this to HR.
Speaker 3 (18:55):
She literally goes... Don't tell HR.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
Oh, my God.
Speaker 4 (19:01):
I'm sorry, but it's just when you're in a tight,
confined space.
Speaker 3 (19:04):
It wasn't your fault.
Speaker 4 (19:05):
No, it wasn't, in my defence, Your Honour. But you
kind of went a little green in the complexion.
Speaker 1 (19:12):
Yes, yeah. And I thought, oh.
Speaker 3 (19:14):
I've never had that situation at work before.
Speaker 1 (19:16):
No. It was a new ground. No, and that's a
good thing to say. Okay, well, listen, guys. Are we
all okay? Everyone's all right? Well, I am, but are you, Rio?
An accidental... Yes.
Speaker 4 (19:28):
Encounter.
Speaker 1 (19:29):
Accidental grazing. And that's going to happen in a small space. Exactly.
So from now on, one of you just needs to
leave a minute before the other person.
Speaker 5 (19:37):
Yeah, true.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
So this can never happen again.
Speaker 2 (19:38):
Yes, true.
Speaker 1 (19:38):
We can't have a repeated occurrence of this, okay? I'm
glad we cleared that up, guys, okay?
Speaker 2 (19:43):
The Christian O'Connell Show podcast.
Speaker 1 (19:46):
Your kids are never too old to have a meltdown.
Our eldest daughter, Ruby... she's had her eyes on some
big oversized sort of trench coat car coat by ladies.
And so I said, look, I'll meet you. You try
it on, and then if you like it, maybe I'll
buy it for you, okay? So I meet her yesterday.
She's really keen for me to come and see this jacket, okay?
(20:08):
So I get there. You know, I hightailed it out
of here yesterday. Did the show meeting. I was there
at 10 o'clock. The store is opening. There's no one
else there. We go in, and within 10 minutes... She's
having a meltdown in there. And we are having a
kind of argument. Oh, no. It's not really a proper argument,
but she's having a meltdown. We've all been this. You
know when you've really set your heart on something for
(20:28):
like a week or two? I'm going to get that.
You imagine who you're going to be in that.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
Yes, yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:32):
I'll be a whole new person. Whole new person. Whole
new world of possibilities opening up. Right? And then it just,
you know when you put it on, you try and
convince yourself. Yes, yes.
Speaker 3 (20:43):
Maybe it's actually better.
Speaker 1 (20:44):
It's the style.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
Yeah, yes.
Speaker 1 (20:46):
This was that scene yesterday. Oh, Oh, God. I so
wanted that jacket to be right. So it was just
way too big.
Speaker 3 (20:54):
Right.
Speaker 1 (20:55):
Voluminous, right? So we put on small, and it's too
big for her. And I go, don't worry, I think
they do it, it's oversized anyway, they do an extra small.
I'll go and find it, okay? She tries on the
extra small, and I start to get giggles, because it's like,
she keeps looking at herself in the mirror, and she
knows what's not there. Yes, yes. But she's still flickering
between that. Yes, yes. In terms of the image she
(21:17):
thought she was going to have in it. And I
hadn't even said anything. And I was really trying to
hold back words. I was hoping that she'd arrive at
her own decision. This ain't the jacket for you. She doesn't.
So I go, hey, listen, you're the leader of the
French resistance. That's not helpful. What time are the Normandy landings?
(21:38):
You're being very mean now. We both know. I said, listen,
I want you to have a really nice jacket. But
I said, this thing's huge. I said, right, for starters,
you can't drive the car in that. She goes, no,
I know. All right, so you're never driving anywhere in it.
You've got to fold it up 87 times. That's the
sort of thing they could put people in that and
get them off the Titanic.
Speaker 4 (21:59):
It's huge.
Speaker 7 (22:01):
And I said, I can't even see your fingertips.
Speaker 3 (22:03):
Oh, no, she looks like she's wearing her dad's jacket.
Speaker 1 (22:06):
It actually looks like you've got my jacket on. I said,
it's actually 99% jacket, 1% rubes.
Speaker 6 (22:14):
It's very brave of you to take the leap and
say that because she is actually deep down looking for
someone to tell her not to get it.
Speaker 3 (22:21):
But it's hard to be the deliverer.
Speaker 1 (22:22):
Then she was doing that thing, and it's one of
my favourite things, the kids now the age as they're out,
where she was mad laughing. That's as good as it
gets now. That's as good as it gets.
Speaker 2 (22:33):
The Christian O'Connell Show.
Speaker 5 (22:35):
Go on.
Speaker 1 (22:36):
Podcast. Yesterday on the show, we were taking you back
to your teenage bedrooms and asking what were the posters
on the wall. And I got this message towards the
end of it from Chantelle. Christian, we were never allowed
to have posters or anything on our walls because the
blue tack or sticky tape might take the paint off.
So I thought today we do this. Not in this house.
(22:57):
They're normally fatwas and rulings handed down by mum. Dad,
but mainly mum in my house. It was mainly mum.
So it would change from house to house. But I
want to know, what were you banned from in your house? Jen. Christian,
this is an out. I've never heard this one. Jen
Evans wasn't allowed to sit on her bed. because it
would leave a bum imprint on the bedding and make
(23:19):
it look messy. What? Where did you live?
Speaker 2 (23:23):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (23:23):
Buckingham Palace?
Speaker 1 (23:24):
Yes. I also had to eat chisels with a spoon. Oh, no.
So I didn't get dirty fingers. Oh, that's crazy. Who
are you raised by? Hyacinth Bouquet?
Speaker 4 (23:34):
That's a rite of passage with chisels. You put one
on each finger. Eat them off the fingers.
Speaker 6 (23:39):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (23:41):
Yeah, that's going to take some beating, both of those.
But I had to eat measles with a spoon, so
I didn't get that. It's that finger taint. It's exactly that.
The yellow-orange finger taint. Jen, not being able to sit
in your own bed because it might leave a bum imprint.
Who's inspecting the flipping bed? You're not in prison. Nicole
wasn't allowed to watch Simpsons as a kid. Leslie wasn't
(24:03):
allowed to watch Gilligan's Island. We were told by our
dad it was an insult to one's intelligence.
Speaker 2 (24:09):
Oh!
Speaker 1 (24:10):
However, he had no problem with us watching Benny Hill.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
High art.
Speaker 1 (24:19):
Kirsty, I wasn't allowed to watch the movie Fatal Attraction.
Danielle Cook, we weren't allowed red or green cordial in
the house because mum said it made kids hyper. Anything
that brought on too much joy was bad by our
mums and dads, wasn't it? Anything that's going to make
you just too much.
Speaker 3 (24:40):
Yeah, anything happy.
Speaker 1 (24:41):
Vicky, we weren't allowed anything green or any elephant figurines.
Dad was very superstitious. Now, I thought, because I've been
to Thailand a couple of times, I thought, because I've
got a little elephant figurine I brought to Thailand. Well,
I haven't had a lot of bad luck the last
12 months. Is it my fault? I thought elephants were
good luck.
Speaker 4 (24:59):
Well, the trunk has to be up. If the trunk's up,
it's good luck. If the trunk's down.
Speaker 1 (25:04):
It's down.
Speaker 2 (25:05):
Oh, no, no, no.
Speaker 4 (25:06):
You've got to get rid of that. What are you doing?
That's bad.
Speaker 1 (25:10):
Can I turn it upside down?
Speaker 5 (25:11):
No.
Speaker 4 (25:12):
No, trunk must be up.
Speaker 1 (25:13):
Are you sure? What's that based on?
Speaker 4 (25:15):
Or your feng shui will be way out of line.
Speaker 1 (25:17):
I thought it was if they were facing a certain
way as well, the elephants.
Speaker 4 (25:21):
Maybe, but definitely the trunk is a big factor.
Speaker 3 (25:24):
Christian, Christian, Christian.
Speaker 1 (25:25):
Tomorrow, tell you who can win on the show? My
unlucky elephant figurine. Who wants a curse on them? Patsy,
what's it for you? Is there anything you, as a
mum now, is there anything you've banned in your house?
Speaker 4 (25:36):
Absolutely there is.
Speaker 1 (25:37):
Yeah, joy.
Speaker 4 (25:37):
And it's slime. No, it is slime. Because we persisted.
She went through a big stage, probably at about, I'd say,
from eight to ten, where it was all about the
slime and she'd have glitter in the slime.
Speaker 2 (25:50):
So what?
Speaker 4 (25:51):
Oh, no.
Speaker 1 (25:52):
And you were like judging that mum that makes a
kid eat cheeses with a spoon. That's you, Bats.
Speaker 4 (25:57):
No, well, it got on the carpet and it's still
in the carpet and the carpet was new at the time.
So you just can't get it out.
Speaker 1 (26:05):
Not in this house, Audie. Not in this house.
Speaker 4 (26:08):
If you want to do slime, you've got to go
in the backyard.
Speaker 1 (26:10):
You're going to get it on the carpets over the
next couple of years. I can't believe it. I see
my kids still doing it. It drives me nuts. They
start doing their nail varnish. And they put the open,
the little bottle. With the lid off and just on
the carpet. Yeah. And the carpet's not a smooth surface.
And I'm like, oh, my God, please don't actually approach
(26:30):
it like it's a grenade. I'm like, stay. Don't even move.
Don't even move. I'll get to it. And just take
that away for you, Missy. Thank you.
Speaker 4 (26:39):
Not with that shag pile you've got at your place.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Oh, my God. You know, we love that 17 shag pile,
you know. Ria, was this it for you? What was
banned in your house?
Speaker 6 (26:47):
We were not allowed to have any video games in
the house. There was a fatwa on.
Speaker 3 (26:51):
All video games.
Speaker 1 (26:52):
You see, I think that's a good one.
Speaker 6 (26:53):
Well, I mean, then I'd go over to like other kids'
house and I wouldn't be able to play any video
games because I was useless. The only ones we were
allowed were Mario touch typing. Which was a computer game
that teaches you how to touch type. And another game
called Leonardo the Inventor, which was a historical game where
(27:16):
you would learn about the various historical inventions of Leonardo
da Vinci.
Speaker 1 (27:21):
The boys are all piling back to yours for that
one after school.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
The Christian O'Connell Show podcast.
Speaker 1 (27:28):
Not in my house. What were you denied? What was
not allowed in your house when you were growing up?
You can text me 0475 031043. At the moment, our
favourite one is Young Jen Evans. Two parts to this.
Wasn't allowed to sit in her own bed because it
would leave a bum imprint in the bedding. I've never
heard of such a thing.
Speaker 3 (27:49):
God forbid.
Speaker 1 (27:49):
And looked messy. Teenage bedrooms are meant to look messy.
She also had to eat Cheezels with a spoon so
she didn't get that finger tamed. Some of these are incredible. Nicole, Christian,
we weren't allowed to stir our Neapolitan ice cream because
our parents denied the sound of the scraping of the
spoon and the bowls. That's from Nicole. What were they, monks?
(28:11):
It must be silence all the time in the Zen house. Santo,
as soon as my mum finished washing the dishes and
sink after dinner, we were not allowed to use any
glasses or cutlery for the rest of the night.
Speaker 3 (28:22):
Use your hands.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
I'm done for the day. I kind of get it, Santo. Damien,
we weren't allowed inside the house during daylight hours on
the weekend.
Speaker 5 (28:33):
What?
Speaker 1 (28:33):
I don't know what mum and dad were up to.
Speaker 3 (28:37):
Making some more Damien's.
Speaker 1 (28:37):
Yeah. You didn't want to be there during the day. Christian,
we weren't allowed to have McDonald's. That's from Ash. Christian,
we had a man that came round in a van
full of crates of soda. Everyone on our street bought
these bottles every week, but we were never allowed. All
we could hear was the clinking of the Joyce bottles,
but they were never delivered for us. That is heartbreaking.
Speaker 4 (28:59):
Yeah, the soft drink man. I remember that. We weren't allowed.
Speaker 1 (29:02):
And this person just messaged a couple of minutes later going,
I'm just chugging my first can of Coke of the day.
The pendulum's gone too far the other way now. I
know you can do it now. Christian, we had soft
drinks stored in the little bar fridge, but we were
never allowed to drink them because they were only for
special occasions. Then when we finally had a special occasion,
(29:24):
we weren't allowed to drink them because they were for
the adults. Do you remember just as a kid growing up,
this actually really annoys me, how much... referential treatment was
given the adults. Yes. Oh, no, no, that's the adults'
room in there. Oh, no, no, no, those glasses are
for the adults. No, that's the good China. That's the adults' room.
Now the kids have their entire disattachment. They can break
(29:46):
anything of yours.
Speaker 3 (29:46):
Yeah, inmates run the prison.
Speaker 1 (29:47):
A couple of weeks ago, I was looking for, I've
got this rare limited edition Led Zepp t-shirt, right? And
I was looking for it. And I couldn't find it.
I know I haven't lost that. I put it in
my family group chat. None of you have seen my
Led Zeppelin t-shirt. One of my daughters said when she
popped back home briefly the other day, she went into
my wardrobe And chuck it.
Speaker 3 (30:06):
That is.
Speaker 1 (30:07):
Just chuck it.
Speaker 3 (30:08):
That is a violation.
Speaker 1 (30:09):
Just chuck it. Don't I have any rights? No, none.
Speaker 2 (30:13):
The Christian O'Connell Show podcast.
Speaker 1 (30:16):
Okay, we're doing Signed You're an Adult. Christian, you know
when you're an adult, when the most exciting part of
a night out is getting home and going to bed.
This is me telling my daughters 22nd. They all went
on clubbing. I went home, put my trackie dacks on,
watched a terrible sports documentary, and I'm so happy. So happy.
Being in a nightclub? It's too loud. I can't even
have a conversation here. I don't even know what these
(30:38):
music is that these kids are playing these days. What's
that weird smell everywhere? Christian, signs you're an adult. This
is a brilliant one. Constantly wondering about how much milk
there is in the fridge. That's my wife and I.
That's sexting for us. Chris, how much milk have we
got in the fridge? Joining to buy a leech on
the way home. Chris, can you get some milk on
the way home? You would think we'd just live on milk.
(30:58):
Nothing else. That's a great one. Well done, Christian. I'm 24.
I don't own an iron. Oh, no. I use a
hair straightener. No way. This is the beginning of the
end of civilization. No.
Speaker 4 (31:12):
Oh, dear.
Speaker 1 (31:14):
Oh. Christian, we recently went on holiday to Japan. My
husband and I split up for the day. He purchased
a Pokemon merch, and I spent my money buying sushi
and fish-shaped sponges for our kitchen. Definitely signs. Well, one
of you's an adult. This is Cam.
Speaker 3 (31:31):
Cam.
Speaker 1 (31:31):
Christian, when you find the best car park at the
shopping centre, it's next to a place where people can't
park and damage your car. I know what you mean. Christian,
good morning. Signs you're an adult. Looking at calendar, seeing
there are no plans for this coming this weekend and
getting very excited about a weekend of planned nothing. That's
from Chris. Christian, signs you're an adult. When you find
(31:55):
a discussion about irons and ironing, unusually interesting. Interesting. Even,
dare I say, captivating. Hey, we exist to captivate.
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