MINI: Cinema Encounter

Christian recounts a wild encounter with an elderly couple, Malcolm and his wife, at an Elvis movie. As Christian tries to enjoy the film, Malcolm starts snacking on his popcorn and even makes off with his Toblerone. But what happens next is just the beginning of a series of events that will leave you in stitches.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:09):
I Heart Podcasts. You can hear more gold when I
four point three podcasts, playlist and listen live on the
free iHeart app Got anything good? Hey, this is the
Christian O'Connell show podcast. Let me tell you about what
happens Saturday night. All right, So you're going to be

(00:35):
stunned that I said nothing, but you need to understand
in certain ways, I am becoming Australian having Australian passport,
but there are certain characteristics and behavior you can't deny
your DNA and where your raised. I am an Englishman
and there's something in our DNA you cannot stand the
thought of causing a scene. However, it is extreme what
happened to me Saturday night? So I went to see

(00:57):
this Elvis movie epic Elvis Live in Concept. As I
take my seat, I've got my glass of red wine
and my snacks. I'm good to go. I sit down
next to an elderly couple. They are a bickering. They're
really having a real full on bicker. They are I'm
guessing late seventies. As I'm sitting down, the credits are

(01:18):
starting to come and tell us about forthcoming feature presentations
at the cinema. They're still bickering, okay, and people are
starting to like tup. But I don't know whether the
mixt of them being old. They've also, you can tell,
had a couple of drinks. I'd simply lean over and say, hey,
everything all right? Right, She goes, he's forgotten his deafadeh.
I'm like, I said, well, look, I said, we're two

(01:40):
rows from the screen, because we were two rows from
the screen of a very big screen. I'm sure he's
going to pick up enough of what's happening. It's Elvis
live in concerts. They've obviously been around for a while.
But she goes, he's only going to hear some of it.
And I'm like, okay, and they start bickering. I'm saying,
I'm sure it's gonna be fine, and then she goes
to me. She leans over because he's in between us.

(02:02):
She leans on to me and goes, you can tell
him what he can't hear. Then ah nah, six bats down.
So five minutes in, I swear to God, Malcolm, we
became that close friends, leans leans over. It's the first
of many times, and goes away, Oh, I think you
got kidding me. I'll tell you what he said, suspicially

(02:22):
he's singing the whole thing is him live and got it?
He said, suspicious minds? Did you sing it back to him?
What did I felt like? And shall I go and
get the deaf fade? Where is it? She says, he's
partially deaf? And what does that mean? For the next
nineteen minutes? That's only the beginning of things with me
and Malcolm. Ten minutes in he puts his hand into

(02:46):
my popcorn that I haven't done and starts chomping on it.
Right I'm thinking, there's this woman next to me who
nudges me like he because that's not it's the optics
on because suddenly I'm having partially hearing man accusing of
stealing my popcorn. It's not a good look for me,

(03:07):
not like no, he really is rocking a hard place,
so I say nothing. Let him. I didn't touch the
popcorn his hand when in there. By the time he's
had three goes in there and he's chomping away, putting
it in his pie hole. I'm thinking, it's now Malcolm's popcorn.

Speaker 2 (03:23):
But you should have what he should have done when
he went to put his hand in the popcorn you
put your hand in the popcorn as well, graze his hand.
Then you go, oh sorry, and you go, wait a minute,
this is my popcorn.

Speaker 1 (03:32):
Because then what if he'd have said, he's confused as
it is, it's my popcorn. I didn't get thrown out.
There's a headline today. I would have given his knuckles
a bit of a smack. I can't know, Malcolm, get
out of it. I can't. And then then he does
the biggest move out of this. It came in threes.
There was a translate in the Elvis movie him eating

(03:53):
my popcorn, and now he unwraps, non stopping. You have
to draw last time. You have to stand for tob
This is my cinema dinner, Malcolm. Malcolm, he such an
unwrap a tob tobro is that it's not easy to
get one of those out either. That's not a casual thing, Malcolm.

(04:13):
I don't mind the popcorn, but the tobon. God damn it.

Speaker 2 (04:16):
He would have known he didn't buy a toddler own
as well. This is an active aggression.

Speaker 1 (04:20):
So again I'm just unders thinking. I just gotta let
it all go. I've just got to let it go.
You have to stand up for yourself. Man, I said
nothing about the popcorn. He took my tobleron, not just that.
Twenty minutes later, the lady who's next to me nudges
me to go and check it out. Now the toblain's
been moved. His wife, she's having something. Stop. No, I
know what this is.

Speaker 2 (04:40):
I reckon. You know how old people are always getting scammed.
I reckon they're now re scamming the young people.

Speaker 1 (04:46):
I reckon.

Speaker 2 (04:46):
This is some sort of griff they do where he
pretends to be dead.

Speaker 1 (04:50):
It's a long cont your toddler. They got played. He
got a free cinema dinner and came out and they're
ravished though he goes. If he goes to the red Wine,
then we're throwing we're throwing it down. It's on, Malcolm.
You can take the popcorn, okay, and I'm not happy
about the toblerone, but leave the red wine. I said nothing.

(05:10):
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