October 29, 2025 • 28 mins
Jello again. When Jack gets a call from his sponsor, even though it was unplanned, Buck Benny Rides Again!
Episode 246 of The Jack Benny Show. The program originally aired on on February 21, 1937.
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Episode 246 of The Jack Benny Show. The program originally aired on on February 21, 1937.
Please email questions and comments to host@classiccomedyotr.com.
Like us on Facebook at facebook.com/classiccomedyotr. Please share this podcast with your friends and family.
You can also subscribe to our podcast on Spreaker.com, Spotify, iTunes, Stitcher, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, and Google podcasts.
This show is supported by Spreaker Prime.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
Welcome to classic comedy of old time radio. I'm your
host Ron Eckelberger Jelo again. When Jack gets a call
from his sponsor, even though it was unplanned, Buck Benny
rides again. This episode, entitled Buck Benny Rides Again, Part twelve,
is the two hundred and forty sixth Jack Benny Show
(00:39):
and it originally aired on February twenty one, nineteen thirty seven.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
Or a real fruit flavor, blames it more skillfully and
then brings it to you in sex delicious flavors.
Speaker 3 (00:52):
Those are the reasons why.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
Jello has become the fastest selling gelatin dessert in the.
Speaker 3 (00:56):
Entire world today.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
So when you want Jello, always us warned by name,
insist on genuine Jello. Amat, ladies and gentlemen, we bring
(01:27):
you Walkegan's gift to the amusement world. That star of
screen radio and Brewsters Millions, Jack Benny Jello again.
Speaker 4 (01:43):
This is a Jack Benny, the legitimate actor talking and
thanks Don for bringing it up.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
Oh Jack, I want to compliment you on your excellent
performance and the title role of Brewsters Millions last Monday night.
Speaker 3 (01:52):
I was really surprised.
Speaker 4 (01:54):
Surprise, Why John you see me played legitimate parks and
several pictures, haven't you.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
Yes, but you were good Monday night, m Thanks very.
Speaker 4 (02:02):
Much, say Jack. Yes, Bil, that part where you were
throwing away money recklessly, that was rich. I got a
kick out of that. Do you mean when I was
spending money fast and furious? Yes, sir, you certainly are
an actor. Hey, wait a minute, I'm not cheap. And furthermore,
playing a straight part like Brewster is really my racket?
Speaker 3 (02:24):
Jack?
Speaker 4 (02:26):
That's money?
Speaker 3 (02:29):
Did I go ahead? Jack?
Speaker 5 (02:30):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (02:30):
All right?
Speaker 2 (02:31):
Was did you have to read the newspaper report on
your Monday broadcast?
Speaker 4 (02:34):
And no, I didn't, especially that one from Buffalo.
Speaker 3 (02:37):
I thought you'd be interested, so I brought a.
Speaker 6 (02:40):
Couple of them over.
Speaker 4 (02:41):
Well, thanks, John, let me see him get this one
warm weather to hold over the weekend.
Speaker 3 (02:47):
Oh it's on the other side.
Speaker 6 (02:48):
I might have thought he was atrocia.
Speaker 4 (02:52):
Listen, Kenny, that wasn't any imitation.
Speaker 3 (02:54):
That was me.
Speaker 6 (02:55):
You wouldn't spend all that money. I wouldn't.
Speaker 4 (02:57):
Hey, it as bad as Bill. He thinks I'm too. Oh,
I didn't mean that, Jack, Oh yeah, then what did
you mean? All I meant was your wallet doesn't know
the sitdown strike is over. I's lucky you and sallied
my wallet.
Speaker 2 (03:12):
Say you know, Jack, we forgot all about Mary. I
thought her performance in Brewster's Millions was excellent.
Speaker 6 (03:17):
So did I me too?
Speaker 4 (03:18):
Well, she was great, But you know, Fellas, I'm sorry
I let her do it. Well, I can do a
thing with her since last Monday, don't kidd Whenever I
talk to her she gets very ultra and dramatic. In fact,
she thinks she's another Katherine Hepburn.
Speaker 6 (03:30):
Are there two of them?
Speaker 4 (03:31):
Kenny, I tell you, Fellas, I've never seen such a
change girl.
Speaker 3 (03:36):
Here she comes now.
Speaker 4 (03:36):
Oh well, remember Fellas, don't encourage her.
Speaker 5 (03:39):
Hello Mary, Hello Jack, Hello don Oh there you are, Kenneth,
Mary overlooked, phil oh Philips dreadfully sorry?
Speaker 4 (03:51):
Oh listen Mary, snap olive it.
Speaker 5 (03:53):
Where have you been in the library reading way down
east by Shakespeare?
Speaker 4 (03:57):
Cut off that bunk. We're doing a program. You're here
to tell Joe. They act like you always do.
Speaker 7 (04:02):
No, No, they're only last at me.
Speaker 4 (04:03):
Oh they will. Well that's too bad, isn't it, Miss Bernhard?
Speaker 7 (04:09):
Oh you Americans?
Speaker 4 (04:16):
There you are, Fellas? What did I tell you? I've
heard of people going high brow over a period of years,
But I want to tell you Mary, this sudden departure
from your normal self is the most amazing thing I've
ever seen.
Speaker 7 (04:27):
Yes, ages, what's the user?
Speaker 4 (04:31):
Might just as well do a musical program tonight, Come on, Kenny,
do your song.
Speaker 6 (04:34):
No no, they'll only laugh at me.
Speaker 4 (04:37):
The fine Jello program.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
And speaking of jello, my dear frames, need I remind
you that it is economic and don't let the fact
escape you that it has both six most delicious flavors rawberry, raspberry,
chitty orange, Lemondon.
Speaker 6 (04:50):
Oh let's see what's the last one?
Speaker 8 (04:52):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (04:53):
Yes, lime, lime, yes, lime, It was awfully good. Old
fellow really sing Kenneth, I'm not stupid.
Speaker 9 (05:05):
When my dream.
Speaker 8 (05:07):
More comes, Oh.
Speaker 9 (05:12):
Then my dreams nor more will, I will.
Speaker 8 (05:21):
Need you.
Speaker 3 (05:25):
Greet you.
Speaker 8 (05:27):
For you sleep.
Speaker 4 (05:32):
My moon li war will say.
Speaker 6 (05:42):
Of the tanlone.
Speaker 8 (05:46):
Your dream will be sweet spa.
Speaker 9 (05:58):
When my dream ball comess call to me.
Speaker 8 (06:18):
Over a rolling see I went.
Speaker 6 (06:29):
On the shop.
Speaker 8 (06:32):
Of the door. When my dreamb.
Speaker 6 (06:48):
Comes, then my dreams normal.
Speaker 10 (06:56):
Will we will be sweet when.
Speaker 11 (07:08):
My dream That was when my dream boat comes home,
(07:37):
sung by Kenny Baker.
Speaker 4 (07:39):
And you see, Kenny, nobody laughed at you.
Speaker 6 (07:41):
Yeah, they didn't laugh either.
Speaker 7 (07:42):
Yes, you were a hip Oh Jack, you mind if
I retire this?
Speaker 4 (07:47):
Mary? Cut it out now, will you? I'll get back
to your normal self.
Speaker 7 (07:50):
All right, give me a hunk of John.
Speaker 4 (07:52):
Will you here? And don't choo too loud? Hey, Jack,
what about to be? You're gonna play it tonight or not?
I'll listen, Phil, get this great, I'll play the bee
just as soon as I find my violin. I've hired
a private detective to look for it. And believe me,
we're leaving no stone unfurned.
Speaker 6 (08:06):
Could you hide it under a storm?
Speaker 5 (08:09):
But Jack, if you do play it, I won't be
here to root for you. You know, I'm going to
wait tonight for rest arrest?
Speaker 4 (08:15):
Why what's the matter with it?
Speaker 7 (08:16):
I read in Wintell column that I'm sick?
Speaker 4 (08:23):
Well, yeah, I don't know. You look all right? You
see a doctor.
Speaker 7 (08:26):
Who needs a doctor when you got winchell, that's right.
Speaker 4 (08:30):
Well, we're certainly going to mission Mary. Where are you
planning to go?
Speaker 5 (08:34):
Oh?
Speaker 7 (08:34):
I'm going to New York for a couple of weeks.
N we couperate.
Speaker 4 (08:37):
That's a nice place for a rest. Yeah, there's a
lovely Oh, yes, there's a lovely sanitarium there right on
the corner of forty eighth and Broadway. It's called the
Oh what's the name of that place, Bill, The Cotton Club,
that's it, the Cotton Club Club. Oh, your rest there
if you have a plan.
Speaker 7 (08:52):
Yes, that's on my list.
Speaker 6 (08:55):
Saint Mary. Will you do me a favor?
Speaker 4 (08:57):
Sure?
Speaker 2 (08:57):
Kenny?
Speaker 7 (08:57):
What is it?
Speaker 6 (08:58):
Well, when you come back from New York, would you
ain't bringing me some oysters?
Speaker 4 (09:02):
Oysters? Kenny? Can't you get oysters right here in town?
Speaker 6 (09:05):
Yes? But there's no r in Los Angeles.
Speaker 4 (09:12):
A Lessa then moved to Burbank and shut up.
Speaker 5 (09:19):
I did move there, and all you got to do
is shut out.
Speaker 4 (09:23):
We'll miss those answers next week. Ah, but it's great
to go back to New York once in a while,
I don't know, you, renew old acquaintances and see all
your old pals and Bill Baker, Jack Pearl, Goodie as
Ed Sullivan, Fred Allen Quiet. I'm trying to avoid his name, and.
Speaker 3 (09:39):
I don't blame you Jack.
Speaker 2 (09:40):
Did you hear him last Wednesday when he kept saying
how tight and cheap you are?
Speaker 4 (09:44):
Yeah? Oh wait a minute. So that's where Phil Harris
got his idea for those smart cracks about me. I
knew he couldn't be original.
Speaker 3 (09:52):
Come here a.
Speaker 4 (09:52):
Minute, don come here just a second.
Speaker 6 (09:54):
Winner.
Speaker 4 (09:55):
You know Alan talks about me being tight. Were you
ever invited to a party at Fred Allen's house?
Speaker 3 (10:01):
No, Jack, No what?
Speaker 4 (10:02):
Well, he's the kind of a guy that fills you
full of herrings and then makes you pay for a
glass of water. No kidding, really the fact, that's a fact.
Speaker 7 (10:17):
I got a drink there for nothing, but I swallowed
a carnation.
Speaker 4 (10:24):
Well, I'm not surprised anyway, Ladies and gentlemen, since those
gags will be tough to follow. Phil Harris and his
Archester will render a number of titles. He ain't got rhythm?
How about playing Phil? Okay, Jack, as soon as I
get my baton, you what my Boston?
Speaker 3 (10:40):
That's better?
Speaker 4 (10:40):
You killed my gag. There's no r in that either way,
fell Fastidia, we ain't got rhythm from on the Avenue,
(12:30):
conducted by Phil Harris, who didn't know the number was
over until the boys laid down their instruments. Thanks Jack,
I like you too well, some orchestra leader, and I
I mean if you haven't got a baton, I mean
I would a laid do. For our feature attraction. Tonight,
(12:51):
we are going to present a sophisticated English drama entitled
Lady Guinevere's Bracelet or Ring around the Ristie. I will
play the part of Lord Stanley beaver Hat Boss. Mary
Livington will be Millicent, my granddaughter, and Phil Harris will
be Phyllison, my grandfather. The scene is the ancestral mansion
(13:14):
of the beaver Hat located at Hamhock on the Tower, Crowd, England. Now,
before going into this drama, I would like to point
out that the answer.
Speaker 7 (13:24):
That Mary okay, Hello, yes, yes, mister Campbell, he's here.
Oh Jack, it's rot In Campbell of General Food.
Speaker 4 (13:33):
Well the boss and hello, oh hello mister Campbell. Yah
yeah what well, look look mister Campbell. It would be
silly to go back to that because we have no
idea where Cactus Face is hiding. No. Now, look, we
(13:57):
planned this English play and well, I what oh? I
can either look for cactus faith or a new job.
All right, you're the boss. Goodbye to night, ladies and gentlemen.
(14:17):
We will do a command performer the twelfth episode of
our Western Cereal Buck Benny rides Again. We'll do it,
but we won't do it good. I hope I fall
off my horse.
Speaker 7 (14:32):
You will if you get on.
Speaker 4 (14:34):
Get our cowboys suits on. Gosh, help me off with
this frock coat? Mary? Can he throw off the tea
in crumpets? Okay, such waste bringing the horses, don Mary?
Speaker 7 (14:46):
Have you seen my spurs in your back pocket for
a week?
Speaker 4 (14:49):
I thought it was our riders. Anyway, this wave will
go on to media.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
Oh Jack Jack, Mister Campbell seemed just a little bit upset.
Maybe I ought to say something about Jello just to
please him. Well, sure, go ahead, I care ladies and gentlemen.
When you're thinking of a tempting, delicious dessert to serve tonight,
why not think of jello. Remember it has the new
extra rich frish fruit flavor and the taste twice as
(15:21):
good as ever before. Oh that's being conservative, So insist
on genuine jello.
Speaker 3 (15:27):
Look for the big red letters on the bar.
Speaker 4 (15:29):
Oh, by all means do I've been wasting my time
looking for the silver lining playfill you can't.
Speaker 6 (15:36):
Even do a class.
Speaker 4 (16:44):
Absolute dark. And now for our sponsors, play Buck Benny
(17:33):
rides again or Theodora goes wild West. I hope it flops.
I will play the part of shareff Buck Benny. It's
tough an nombre. Has ever wore a wildcat for a muffler? Happy?
Snappy nappy, don't give a rappie?
Speaker 7 (17:47):
Are you Saffy but your trappy?
Speaker 4 (17:53):
The opening scene is the home of Buck Benny early
in the morning, where we find his mother in the
kitchen chopping wood and Buck in bed swing it hurtin music.
Speaker 7 (18:18):
Better get up Buck at six o'clock.
Speaker 4 (18:19):
Six o'clock gone, and I had that rooster set for nine.
What's the matter with him?
Speaker 7 (18:25):
Well, he's a Rhode Island bred. Guess he's still on
Eastern time.
Speaker 4 (18:29):
Hmm. Now I'm gonna buy my alarm cocks in the
west turn him off more. Okay, Well that's too bad.
(18:52):
It's say it's tough losing that time piece.
Speaker 7 (18:56):
It's gonna be tougher reaching them.
Speaker 4 (18:58):
Well more, reckon, I better be getting down at the office.
I've gotta get cactus face this time.
Speaker 7 (19:03):
It's say, Buck, when are you and daith he gonna
get married?
Speaker 4 (19:05):
I don't know, Ma, we can't have a church wedding,
you know, why not? We can't get her Pappy pass
Ike Mueller saloon.
Speaker 7 (19:13):
Well, why don't you take him up north and back
him in.
Speaker 4 (19:17):
I try that. Gotta get going. Now, where's my horse
under the bed? I'm gone? And he always gets the
lower Hello, partner, sleep well here open the door more?
(19:38):
Hello oo oo partner who morning, Deputies, morning, and he
knows about cactus Face, Deputy Wilson, no other words. You
(20:00):
got any report, Baker?
Speaker 6 (20:02):
Well you know that five hundred dollars reward you posted.
Speaker 4 (20:04):
Yeah, he came here and collected it.
Speaker 6 (20:07):
Hol Dad, Cactus face.
Speaker 4 (20:11):
Cactus face? He had durned poor? Why did you let
him go? And that's the dumbest thing I ever heard of.
Speaker 6 (20:15):
I've done dumber things than that, begger.
Speaker 4 (20:19):
That's a fine thing after the way I worked to
day and night to catch that vomit.
Speaker 6 (20:23):
Well, I came closer than you did.
Speaker 4 (20:24):
He wants to argue, yet, never mind, buck, you show
been hot on his trail, Mister Campbell, don't seem to
think so. I listened, Deputies. There's been a report the
cactus face the scene walking into the bucket of blood
bomber shop. And I want you boys to go there
right away, Okay, sir, be sure and look under all lather.
(20:45):
If he's not there, take a look next door as
a goodie good eat tea shop.
Speaker 6 (20:48):
Shucks, I'm no sissy.
Speaker 4 (20:50):
I don't what I tell you to. I'm gonna stop
over at Daisy Carson's house and I'll join you boys
later had buff Benny rights again. Woo fucker woo.
Speaker 5 (21:09):
Me in.
Speaker 7 (21:11):
Hello, dazy, Hello, tall dark and double ten.
Speaker 4 (21:16):
Well, gah, you're Adam's apple ain't exactly out in the open?
Speaker 7 (21:20):
Why bob gal don't have Adam's apple?
Speaker 4 (21:22):
Too late? Now it got a snicker, Say, Daisy, I
ain't seen you around for the past five weeks. What
you've been doing?
Speaker 7 (21:29):
Just sitting here and knitting that?
Speaker 5 (21:31):
So?
Speaker 4 (21:31):
What you knitting?
Speaker 7 (21:32):
I won't know. Let's finished, I.
Speaker 4 (21:34):
Hope with the sock. I'm tired of wearing just one.
Speaking of socks reminds me of soaks. Where's your pappy?
Speaker 7 (21:42):
He's out in the backyard working on it.
Speaker 4 (21:43):
Still it's still.
Speaker 7 (21:45):
Yes, he's making his own liquor.
Speaker 4 (21:46):
Now what does he do with the stuff? Bottle of?
Speaker 7 (21:48):
Don't he just drinks it as it comes out?
Speaker 4 (21:51):
Impatient old cuss, isn't it?
Speaker 3 (21:53):
You know?
Speaker 4 (21:54):
Daisy? I see him all riding once in a while.
How can a man drink so much and stay on
a horse.
Speaker 7 (21:58):
It was kind of hard until he talked the horse
hot of shagger.
Speaker 2 (22:06):
I'm there, are working.
Speaker 4 (22:07):
On his still, eh in, old Daisy, you better be careful.
Them steals is mighty dangerous. Here's pat now, Hello, Buck,
Frank conson, that's the worst thing you could have done.
That still blew you right across the yard into the house. Well,
I was coming here anyway. That was quite an explosion.
(22:31):
Wear your boots, don't know I had them on when
I went out. You gotta be careful with those steals, Frank,
wonder what made her blow up?
Speaker 5 (22:39):
Buck only build a small farms to breathe into us.
Speaker 4 (22:44):
Frank, you better stop drinking that stuff, or them pink
elephants will get you shucks. You got 'em trained now.
One of 'em can play the bed God.
Speaker 7 (22:57):
He can't, yes if someone doesn't steal his trunks.
Speaker 4 (23:00):
Hmmm, well, Buck, see you later. I gotta go out
and get an expert to help me fix that. Still.
Where are you going after that, Brandy fella?
Speaker 5 (23:07):
No?
Speaker 4 (23:07):
After the gin man? Oh well, Dazzy, I was just
on my way to get taxta space and thought i'd
drop by and talk to you something I won't ask yes,
what is it?
Speaker 7 (23:17):
Buck?
Speaker 4 (23:18):
Well, Daz, I was just wondering if you reconsidered my
offer of marriage.
Speaker 5 (23:22):
I ain't got time to talk about it now, buck,
I'm leaving for New York right away.
Speaker 4 (23:26):
New York, yep.
Speaker 7 (23:27):
I just saw a little vacation would do me good.
Speaker 4 (23:29):
Well, well, oh, she's easy. There's a girl I know
who's making the same trip. Her name's Mary Livingston. You
might meet up with her on the cream Mary.
Speaker 7 (23:39):
Livingston at Big Radio Star.
Speaker 4 (23:41):
Yeah, she I like her going. It seems like everyone
to go into New York. I much, Daisy. I got
the buggy waiting outside to take you down for train.
Speaker 7 (23:54):
You right with your scooter.
Speaker 4 (23:58):
Here, I'll help you with your cap it back? Do
you mind if I ride down the train with your
daycy fine?
Speaker 7 (24:06):
I was hoping you would.
Speaker 4 (24:07):
Well, come on, let's go. Well, Daisy's kind of nice
sitting here alongside him. See, I sure hate to see
you go when you get to New York. You'll want
to watch out for them city slickers. Pretty gal like
you can be too careful.
Speaker 7 (24:27):
You set it and move over. Oh say, bus, I
hope you catch Captain face before I get back.
Speaker 4 (24:34):
Dux, I plumb forgot about him. You're more important to
me than anybody.
Speaker 5 (24:38):
Uh huh.
Speaker 7 (24:39):
One more crack like that, And I won't get on
the train.
Speaker 4 (24:42):
And say, DZ. I'm just happen to think. And you're
in New York. If you go into Macy's, bring me
back a plug in toback. I understand they got the
fancy kind.
Speaker 7 (24:51):
Well, but I forgetting here the depot see a awful lonely.
Speaker 4 (24:54):
All of a sudden, so do I gall But don't worry.
Just have a good time. I'll see you when you
get back.
Speaker 3 (25:03):
Better.
Speaker 4 (25:03):
Hurry up, scooter if guns the tree, okay, but come on, gayas.
Speaker 2 (25:24):
Here's a new way to make an old favorite chocolate pudding,
and it's just about the easiest way of all. Use
jello chocolate pudding. It's the modern, enough to date dessert
that gives you the satin smooth texture and that just
right consistency. It has the same homemade taste that made
your mother's chocolate pudding so good. It's richer, creamier, more
chocolate e and it's amazingly easy to make. Just mix
(25:47):
the contents of one package of yellow chocolate pudding with milk,
cook and stir over a low flame until the mixture
comes to a boil and the thick and smooth it takes.
Speaker 3 (25:56):
Only a few minutes.
Speaker 2 (25:57):
Then cool and serve in sherbet glasses.
Speaker 3 (26:00):
One package makes six servings.
Speaker 2 (26:02):
And everybody is bound to give this grand chocolate pudding.
Speaker 3 (26:05):
The enthusiastic reception it deserves.
Speaker 2 (26:08):
And the Jello chocolate pudding is delicious too if you
add to it raisins, nuts or chop up marshmallows. Try
it plain or with one of these variations. Sometimes remember
Jello chocolate pudding sells for the same low price as
Jello pastor grocer tomorrow for Jello Chocolate Pudding.
Speaker 4 (26:44):
Is the last number of the twenty first program in
the New Jello series and will be video Yeah next
Sunday night at the same time and over yet, Folks,
next Sunday, I will definitely play the bay on the
level of time, fellas. I'm starting to practice it tonight
as totally a Sampo Good Knight, folk k alo o.
Speaker 3 (27:28):
Obento programs.
Speaker 2 (27:29):
Farrow Jack Benning at her letter and comes to us
from Hollywood.
Speaker 4 (27:32):
Over the Red Network of the National Broadcast and Company.
Speaker 3 (27:41):
Hey f I Los Angeles Anthony Incorporated.
Speaker 1 (27:44):
Please send your questions and comments to host a classiccomedy
o t R dot com until next time. In the
words of Fred Rogers, in the perspective of infinity, our
differences are infinite, testimal. We are intimately related.
Welcome to classic comedy of old time radio. I'm your
host Ron Eckelberger Jelo again. When Jack gets a call
from his sponsor, even though it was unplanned, Buck Benny
rides again. This episode, entitled Buck Benny Rides Again, Part twelve,
is the two hundred and forty sixth Jack Benny Show
(00:39):
and it originally aired on February twenty one, nineteen thirty seven.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
Or a real fruit flavor, blames it more skillfully and
then brings it to you in sex delicious flavors.
Speaker 3 (00:52):
Those are the reasons why.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
Jello has become the fastest selling gelatin dessert in the.
Speaker 3 (00:56):
Entire world today.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
So when you want Jello, always us warned by name,
insist on genuine Jello. Amat, ladies and gentlemen, we bring
(01:27):
you Walkegan's gift to the amusement world. That star of
screen radio and Brewsters Millions, Jack Benny Jello again.
Speaker 4 (01:43):
This is a Jack Benny, the legitimate actor talking and
thanks Don for bringing it up.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
Oh Jack, I want to compliment you on your excellent
performance and the title role of Brewsters Millions last Monday night.
Speaker 3 (01:52):
I was really surprised.
Speaker 4 (01:54):
Surprise, Why John you see me played legitimate parks and
several pictures, haven't you.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
Yes, but you were good Monday night, m Thanks very.
Speaker 4 (02:02):
Much, say Jack. Yes, Bil, that part where you were
throwing away money recklessly, that was rich. I got a
kick out of that. Do you mean when I was
spending money fast and furious? Yes, sir, you certainly are
an actor. Hey, wait a minute, I'm not cheap. And furthermore,
playing a straight part like Brewster is really my racket?
Speaker 3 (02:24):
Jack?
Speaker 4 (02:26):
That's money?
Speaker 3 (02:29):
Did I go ahead? Jack?
Speaker 5 (02:30):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (02:30):
All right?
Speaker 2 (02:31):
Was did you have to read the newspaper report on
your Monday broadcast?
Speaker 4 (02:34):
And no, I didn't, especially that one from Buffalo.
Speaker 3 (02:37):
I thought you'd be interested, so I brought a.
Speaker 6 (02:40):
Couple of them over.
Speaker 4 (02:41):
Well, thanks, John, let me see him get this one
warm weather to hold over the weekend.
Speaker 3 (02:47):
Oh it's on the other side.
Speaker 6 (02:48):
I might have thought he was atrocia.
Speaker 4 (02:52):
Listen, Kenny, that wasn't any imitation.
Speaker 3 (02:54):
That was me.
Speaker 6 (02:55):
You wouldn't spend all that money. I wouldn't.
Speaker 4 (02:57):
Hey, it as bad as Bill. He thinks I'm too. Oh,
I didn't mean that, Jack, Oh yeah, then what did
you mean? All I meant was your wallet doesn't know
the sitdown strike is over. I's lucky you and sallied
my wallet.
Speaker 2 (03:12):
Say you know, Jack, we forgot all about Mary. I
thought her performance in Brewster's Millions was excellent.
Speaker 6 (03:17):
So did I me too?
Speaker 4 (03:18):
Well, she was great, But you know, Fellas, I'm sorry
I let her do it. Well, I can do a
thing with her since last Monday, don't kidd Whenever I
talk to her she gets very ultra and dramatic. In fact,
she thinks she's another Katherine Hepburn.
Speaker 6 (03:30):
Are there two of them?
Speaker 4 (03:31):
Kenny, I tell you, Fellas, I've never seen such a
change girl.
Speaker 3 (03:36):
Here she comes now.
Speaker 4 (03:36):
Oh well, remember Fellas, don't encourage her.
Speaker 5 (03:39):
Hello Mary, Hello Jack, Hello don Oh there you are, Kenneth,
Mary overlooked, phil oh Philips dreadfully sorry?
Speaker 4 (03:51):
Oh listen Mary, snap olive it.
Speaker 5 (03:53):
Where have you been in the library reading way down
east by Shakespeare?
Speaker 4 (03:57):
Cut off that bunk. We're doing a program. You're here
to tell Joe. They act like you always do.
Speaker 7 (04:02):
No, No, they're only last at me.
Speaker 4 (04:03):
Oh they will. Well that's too bad, isn't it, Miss Bernhard?
Speaker 7 (04:09):
Oh you Americans?
Speaker 4 (04:16):
There you are, Fellas? What did I tell you? I've
heard of people going high brow over a period of years,
But I want to tell you Mary, this sudden departure
from your normal self is the most amazing thing I've
ever seen.
Speaker 7 (04:27):
Yes, ages, what's the user?
Speaker 4 (04:31):
Might just as well do a musical program tonight, Come on, Kenny,
do your song.
Speaker 6 (04:34):
No no, they'll only laugh at me.
Speaker 4 (04:37):
The fine Jello program.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
And speaking of jello, my dear frames, need I remind
you that it is economic and don't let the fact
escape you that it has both six most delicious flavors rawberry, raspberry,
chitty orange, Lemondon.
Speaker 6 (04:50):
Oh let's see what's the last one?
Speaker 8 (04:52):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (04:53):
Yes, lime, lime, yes, lime, It was awfully good. Old
fellow really sing Kenneth, I'm not stupid.
Speaker 9 (05:05):
When my dream.
Speaker 8 (05:07):
More comes, Oh.
Speaker 9 (05:12):
Then my dreams nor more will, I will.
Speaker 8 (05:21):
Need you.
Speaker 3 (05:25):
Greet you.
Speaker 8 (05:27):
For you sleep.
Speaker 4 (05:32):
My moon li war will say.
Speaker 6 (05:42):
Of the tanlone.
Speaker 8 (05:46):
Your dream will be sweet spa.
Speaker 9 (05:58):
When my dream ball comess call to me.
Speaker 8 (06:18):
Over a rolling see I went.
Speaker 6 (06:29):
On the shop.
Speaker 8 (06:32):
Of the door. When my dreamb.
Speaker 6 (06:48):
Comes, then my dreams normal.
Speaker 10 (06:56):
Will we will be sweet when.
Speaker 11 (07:08):
My dream That was when my dream boat comes home,
(07:37):
sung by Kenny Baker.
Speaker 4 (07:39):
And you see, Kenny, nobody laughed at you.
Speaker 6 (07:41):
Yeah, they didn't laugh either.
Speaker 7 (07:42):
Yes, you were a hip Oh Jack, you mind if
I retire this?
Speaker 4 (07:47):
Mary? Cut it out now, will you? I'll get back
to your normal self.
Speaker 7 (07:50):
All right, give me a hunk of John.
Speaker 4 (07:52):
Will you here? And don't choo too loud? Hey, Jack,
what about to be? You're gonna play it tonight or not?
I'll listen, Phil, get this great, I'll play the bee
just as soon as I find my violin. I've hired
a private detective to look for it. And believe me,
we're leaving no stone unfurned.
Speaker 6 (08:06):
Could you hide it under a storm?
Speaker 5 (08:09):
But Jack, if you do play it, I won't be
here to root for you. You know, I'm going to
wait tonight for rest arrest?
Speaker 4 (08:15):
Why what's the matter with it?
Speaker 7 (08:16):
I read in Wintell column that I'm sick?
Speaker 4 (08:23):
Well, yeah, I don't know. You look all right? You
see a doctor.
Speaker 7 (08:26):
Who needs a doctor when you got winchell, that's right.
Speaker 4 (08:30):
Well, we're certainly going to mission Mary. Where are you
planning to go?
Speaker 5 (08:34):
Oh?
Speaker 7 (08:34):
I'm going to New York for a couple of weeks.
N we couperate.
Speaker 4 (08:37):
That's a nice place for a rest. Yeah, there's a
lovely Oh, yes, there's a lovely sanitarium there right on
the corner of forty eighth and Broadway. It's called the
Oh what's the name of that place, Bill, The Cotton Club,
that's it, the Cotton Club Club. Oh, your rest there
if you have a plan.
Speaker 7 (08:52):
Yes, that's on my list.
Speaker 6 (08:55):
Saint Mary. Will you do me a favor?
Speaker 4 (08:57):
Sure?
Speaker 2 (08:57):
Kenny?
Speaker 7 (08:57):
What is it?
Speaker 6 (08:58):
Well, when you come back from New York, would you
ain't bringing me some oysters?
Speaker 4 (09:02):
Oysters? Kenny? Can't you get oysters right here in town?
Speaker 6 (09:05):
Yes? But there's no r in Los Angeles.
Speaker 4 (09:12):
A Lessa then moved to Burbank and shut up.
Speaker 5 (09:19):
I did move there, and all you got to do
is shut out.
Speaker 4 (09:23):
We'll miss those answers next week. Ah, but it's great
to go back to New York once in a while,
I don't know, you, renew old acquaintances and see all
your old pals and Bill Baker, Jack Pearl, Goodie as
Ed Sullivan, Fred Allen Quiet. I'm trying to avoid his name, and.
Speaker 3 (09:39):
I don't blame you Jack.
Speaker 2 (09:40):
Did you hear him last Wednesday when he kept saying
how tight and cheap you are?
Speaker 4 (09:44):
Yeah? Oh wait a minute. So that's where Phil Harris
got his idea for those smart cracks about me. I
knew he couldn't be original.
Speaker 3 (09:52):
Come here a.
Speaker 4 (09:52):
Minute, don come here just a second.
Speaker 6 (09:54):
Winner.
Speaker 4 (09:55):
You know Alan talks about me being tight. Were you
ever invited to a party at Fred Allen's house?
Speaker 3 (10:01):
No, Jack, No what?
Speaker 4 (10:02):
Well, he's the kind of a guy that fills you
full of herrings and then makes you pay for a
glass of water. No kidding, really the fact, that's a fact.
Speaker 7 (10:17):
I got a drink there for nothing, but I swallowed
a carnation.
Speaker 4 (10:24):
Well, I'm not surprised anyway, Ladies and gentlemen, since those
gags will be tough to follow. Phil Harris and his
Archester will render a number of titles. He ain't got rhythm?
How about playing Phil? Okay, Jack, as soon as I
get my baton, you what my Boston?
Speaker 3 (10:40):
That's better?
Speaker 4 (10:40):
You killed my gag. There's no r in that either way,
fell Fastidia, we ain't got rhythm from on the Avenue,
(12:30):
conducted by Phil Harris, who didn't know the number was
over until the boys laid down their instruments. Thanks Jack,
I like you too well, some orchestra leader, and I
I mean if you haven't got a baton, I mean
I would a laid do. For our feature attraction. Tonight,
(12:51):
we are going to present a sophisticated English drama entitled
Lady Guinevere's Bracelet or Ring around the Ristie. I will
play the part of Lord Stanley beaver Hat Boss. Mary
Livington will be Millicent, my granddaughter, and Phil Harris will
be Phyllison, my grandfather. The scene is the ancestral mansion
(13:14):
of the beaver Hat located at Hamhock on the Tower, Crowd, England. Now,
before going into this drama, I would like to point
out that the answer.
Speaker 7 (13:24):
That Mary okay, Hello, yes, yes, mister Campbell, he's here.
Oh Jack, it's rot In Campbell of General Food.
Speaker 4 (13:33):
Well the boss and hello, oh hello mister Campbell. Yah
yeah what well, look look mister Campbell. It would be
silly to go back to that because we have no
idea where Cactus Face is hiding. No. Now, look, we
(13:57):
planned this English play and well, I what oh? I
can either look for cactus faith or a new job.
All right, you're the boss. Goodbye to night, ladies and gentlemen.
(14:17):
We will do a command performer the twelfth episode of
our Western Cereal Buck Benny rides Again. We'll do it,
but we won't do it good. I hope I fall
off my horse.
Speaker 7 (14:32):
You will if you get on.
Speaker 4 (14:34):
Get our cowboys suits on. Gosh, help me off with
this frock coat? Mary? Can he throw off the tea
in crumpets? Okay, such waste bringing the horses, don Mary?
Speaker 7 (14:46):
Have you seen my spurs in your back pocket for
a week?
Speaker 4 (14:49):
I thought it was our riders. Anyway, this wave will
go on to media.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
Oh Jack Jack, Mister Campbell seemed just a little bit upset.
Maybe I ought to say something about Jello just to
please him. Well, sure, go ahead, I care ladies and gentlemen.
When you're thinking of a tempting, delicious dessert to serve tonight,
why not think of jello. Remember it has the new
extra rich frish fruit flavor and the taste twice as
(15:21):
good as ever before. Oh that's being conservative, So insist
on genuine jello.
Speaker 3 (15:27):
Look for the big red letters on the bar.
Speaker 4 (15:29):
Oh, by all means do I've been wasting my time
looking for the silver lining playfill you can't.
Speaker 6 (15:36):
Even do a class.
Speaker 4 (16:44):
Absolute dark. And now for our sponsors, play Buck Benny
(17:33):
rides again or Theodora goes wild West. I hope it flops.
I will play the part of shareff Buck Benny. It's
tough an nombre. Has ever wore a wildcat for a muffler? Happy?
Snappy nappy, don't give a rappie?
Speaker 7 (17:47):
Are you Saffy but your trappy?
Speaker 4 (17:53):
The opening scene is the home of Buck Benny early
in the morning, where we find his mother in the
kitchen chopping wood and Buck in bed swing it hurtin music.
Speaker 7 (18:18):
Better get up Buck at six o'clock.
Speaker 4 (18:19):
Six o'clock gone, and I had that rooster set for nine.
What's the matter with him?
Speaker 7 (18:25):
Well, he's a Rhode Island bred. Guess he's still on
Eastern time.
Speaker 4 (18:29):
Hmm. Now I'm gonna buy my alarm cocks in the
west turn him off more. Okay, Well that's too bad.
(18:52):
It's say it's tough losing that time piece.
Speaker 7 (18:56):
It's gonna be tougher reaching them.
Speaker 4 (18:58):
Well more, reckon, I better be getting down at the office.
I've gotta get cactus face this time.
Speaker 7 (19:03):
It's say, Buck, when are you and daith he gonna
get married?
Speaker 4 (19:05):
I don't know, Ma, we can't have a church wedding,
you know, why not? We can't get her Pappy pass
Ike Mueller saloon.
Speaker 7 (19:13):
Well, why don't you take him up north and back
him in.
Speaker 4 (19:17):
I try that. Gotta get going. Now, where's my horse
under the bed? I'm gone? And he always gets the
lower Hello, partner, sleep well here open the door more?
(19:38):
Hello oo oo partner who morning, Deputies, morning, and he
knows about cactus Face, Deputy Wilson, no other words. You
(20:00):
got any report, Baker?
Speaker 6 (20:02):
Well you know that five hundred dollars reward you posted.
Speaker 4 (20:04):
Yeah, he came here and collected it.
Speaker 6 (20:07):
Hol Dad, Cactus face.
Speaker 4 (20:11):
Cactus face? He had durned poor? Why did you let
him go? And that's the dumbest thing I ever heard of.
Speaker 6 (20:15):
I've done dumber things than that, begger.
Speaker 4 (20:19):
That's a fine thing after the way I worked to
day and night to catch that vomit.
Speaker 6 (20:23):
Well, I came closer than you did.
Speaker 4 (20:24):
He wants to argue, yet, never mind, buck, you show
been hot on his trail, Mister Campbell, don't seem to
think so. I listened, Deputies. There's been a report the
cactus face the scene walking into the bucket of blood
bomber shop. And I want you boys to go there
right away, Okay, sir, be sure and look under all lather.
(20:45):
If he's not there, take a look next door as
a goodie good eat tea shop.
Speaker 6 (20:48):
Shucks, I'm no sissy.
Speaker 4 (20:50):
I don't what I tell you to. I'm gonna stop
over at Daisy Carson's house and I'll join you boys
later had buff Benny rights again. Woo fucker woo.
Speaker 5 (21:09):
Me in.
Speaker 7 (21:11):
Hello, dazy, Hello, tall dark and double ten.
Speaker 4 (21:16):
Well, gah, you're Adam's apple ain't exactly out in the open?
Speaker 7 (21:20):
Why bob gal don't have Adam's apple?
Speaker 4 (21:22):
Too late? Now it got a snicker, Say, Daisy, I
ain't seen you around for the past five weeks. What
you've been doing?
Speaker 7 (21:29):
Just sitting here and knitting that?
Speaker 5 (21:31):
So?
Speaker 4 (21:31):
What you knitting?
Speaker 7 (21:32):
I won't know. Let's finished, I.
Speaker 4 (21:34):
Hope with the sock. I'm tired of wearing just one.
Speaking of socks reminds me of soaks. Where's your pappy?
Speaker 7 (21:42):
He's out in the backyard working on it.
Speaker 4 (21:43):
Still it's still.
Speaker 7 (21:45):
Yes, he's making his own liquor.
Speaker 4 (21:46):
Now what does he do with the stuff? Bottle of?
Speaker 7 (21:48):
Don't he just drinks it as it comes out?
Speaker 4 (21:51):
Impatient old cuss, isn't it?
Speaker 3 (21:53):
You know?
Speaker 4 (21:54):
Daisy? I see him all riding once in a while.
How can a man drink so much and stay on
a horse.
Speaker 7 (21:58):
It was kind of hard until he talked the horse
hot of shagger.
Speaker 2 (22:06):
I'm there, are working.
Speaker 4 (22:07):
On his still, eh in, old Daisy, you better be careful.
Them steals is mighty dangerous. Here's pat now, Hello, Buck,
Frank conson, that's the worst thing you could have done.
That still blew you right across the yard into the house. Well,
I was coming here anyway. That was quite an explosion.
(22:31):
Wear your boots, don't know I had them on when
I went out. You gotta be careful with those steals, Frank,
wonder what made her blow up?
Speaker 5 (22:39):
Buck only build a small farms to breathe into us.
Speaker 4 (22:44):
Frank, you better stop drinking that stuff, or them pink
elephants will get you shucks. You got 'em trained now.
One of 'em can play the bed God.
Speaker 7 (22:57):
He can't, yes if someone doesn't steal his trunks.
Speaker 4 (23:00):
Hmmm, well, Buck, see you later. I gotta go out
and get an expert to help me fix that. Still.
Where are you going after that, Brandy fella?
Speaker 5 (23:07):
No?
Speaker 4 (23:07):
After the gin man? Oh well, Dazzy, I was just
on my way to get taxta space and thought i'd
drop by and talk to you something I won't ask yes,
what is it?
Speaker 7 (23:17):
Buck?
Speaker 4 (23:18):
Well, Daz, I was just wondering if you reconsidered my
offer of marriage.
Speaker 5 (23:22):
I ain't got time to talk about it now, buck,
I'm leaving for New York right away.
Speaker 4 (23:26):
New York, yep.
Speaker 7 (23:27):
I just saw a little vacation would do me good.
Speaker 4 (23:29):
Well, well, oh, she's easy. There's a girl I know
who's making the same trip. Her name's Mary Livingston. You
might meet up with her on the cream Mary.
Speaker 7 (23:39):
Livingston at Big Radio Star.
Speaker 4 (23:41):
Yeah, she I like her going. It seems like everyone
to go into New York. I much, Daisy. I got
the buggy waiting outside to take you down for train.
Speaker 7 (23:54):
You right with your scooter.
Speaker 4 (23:58):
Here, I'll help you with your cap it back? Do
you mind if I ride down the train with your
daycy fine?
Speaker 7 (24:06):
I was hoping you would.
Speaker 4 (24:07):
Well, come on, let's go. Well, Daisy's kind of nice
sitting here alongside him. See, I sure hate to see
you go when you get to New York. You'll want
to watch out for them city slickers. Pretty gal like
you can be too careful.
Speaker 7 (24:27):
You set it and move over. Oh say, bus, I
hope you catch Captain face before I get back.
Speaker 4 (24:34):
Dux, I plumb forgot about him. You're more important to
me than anybody.
Speaker 5 (24:38):
Uh huh.
Speaker 7 (24:39):
One more crack like that, And I won't get on
the train.
Speaker 4 (24:42):
And say, DZ. I'm just happen to think. And you're
in New York. If you go into Macy's, bring me
back a plug in toback. I understand they got the
fancy kind.
Speaker 7 (24:51):
Well, but I forgetting here the depot see a awful lonely.
Speaker 4 (24:54):
All of a sudden, so do I gall But don't worry.
Just have a good time. I'll see you when you
get back.
Speaker 3 (25:03):
Better.
Speaker 4 (25:03):
Hurry up, scooter if guns the tree, okay, but come on, gayas.
Speaker 2 (25:24):
Here's a new way to make an old favorite chocolate pudding,
and it's just about the easiest way of all. Use
jello chocolate pudding. It's the modern, enough to date dessert
that gives you the satin smooth texture and that just
right consistency. It has the same homemade taste that made
your mother's chocolate pudding so good. It's richer, creamier, more
chocolate e and it's amazingly easy to make. Just mix
(25:47):
the contents of one package of yellow chocolate pudding with milk,
cook and stir over a low flame until the mixture
comes to a boil and the thick and smooth it takes.
Speaker 3 (25:56):
Only a few minutes.
Speaker 2 (25:57):
Then cool and serve in sherbet glasses.
Speaker 3 (26:00):
One package makes six servings.
Speaker 2 (26:02):
And everybody is bound to give this grand chocolate pudding.
Speaker 3 (26:05):
The enthusiastic reception it deserves.
Speaker 2 (26:08):
And the Jello chocolate pudding is delicious too if you
add to it raisins, nuts or chop up marshmallows. Try
it plain or with one of these variations. Sometimes remember
Jello chocolate pudding sells for the same low price as
Jello pastor grocer tomorrow for Jello Chocolate Pudding.
Speaker 4 (26:44):
Is the last number of the twenty first program in
the New Jello series and will be video Yeah next
Sunday night at the same time and over yet, Folks,
next Sunday, I will definitely play the bay on the
level of time, fellas. I'm starting to practice it tonight
as totally a Sampo Good Knight, folk k alo o.
Speaker 3 (27:28):
Obento programs.
Speaker 2 (27:29):
Farrow Jack Benning at her letter and comes to us
from Hollywood.
Speaker 4 (27:32):
Over the Red Network of the National Broadcast and Company.
Speaker 3 (27:41):
Hey f I Los Angeles Anthony Incorporated.
Speaker 1 (27:44):
Please send your questions and comments to host a classiccomedy
o t R dot com until next time. In the
words of Fred Rogers, in the perspective of infinity, our
differences are infinite, testimal. We are intimately related.
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