Be The Change You Want To See In The World

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FULL TRANSCRIPT

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"Be the change you want to see in the world." As a 'Change Catalyst,' I love this quote from Mahatma Gandhi.

Hi, I am Pascale Gibon. Welcome to episode 252 of The Everyday Life balance Show. Thank you for tuning in.

Is there anyone in your life you wish you could change?

Wendy Price, the Amazon international bestseller I interviewed in May this year, posted a quote from Lori Deschene, which is the following:

"No one changes

Unless they want to.

Not if you beg them.

Not if you shame them.

Not if you use reason,

emotion or rough love.

There’s only one thing that

makes someone change:

their own realisation that

they need to do it. And

there’s only one time

it will happen: when they

decide they’re ready."

It is clear that each individual has free will. Free will means that change becomes possible only when you decide to change. No matter how hard someone may try to change you, change is only possible when YOU are ready to change.

Of course, their complaints or criticism might hurt your feelings however I like to say that perhaps you have met your best teachers. Their complaint or criticism might trigger an opportunity for your growth. Can you think of a time when it was the case? Perhaps one of your parents said something which made you think and change direction.

It is human nature to try to change others when we are unhappy with their behaviour or do not get what we want. This behaviour is especially true in relationships. However, no matter how hard you try to change another person, you will not succeed. 

Here is why:

In general, human beings do not like to hear there is something wrong with them

They refuse to be known for their shortcomings because it makes them feel vulnerable

They resist change out of stubbornness

They want to be loved, not criticised

And they do not like any infringement on their freedom; It is their lives and decisions

At the same time, human beings exist for the purpose of growth. Therefore if we do not learn, grow and expand, our spirit dies.

Can you imagine if, as an individual, you were completely closed up to any new experience? How would your life be then? I can imagine it would be miserable and unadventurous.

Therefore, change is openness and human need. It brings improvement, excitement and self-mastery. Becoming a better sister, brother, father, mother, son, daughter, husband, wife, friend, employee, entrepreneur, employer and grandparent enriches our lives and increases our happiness. We are willing to give more of our best selves, and our willingness is a formidable expression of love.

Can you see how you can view change differently?

When you expect someone to change, it might indicate that you only see what is wrong with them. You waste any advice if the person you wish to help is not open to listening. However, if you look at their positive sides and emphasise that, you will discover their true nature.

When you can see their true nature, it is within you too. Therefore, when you contemplate change, let it start with you to become a positive and influential magnet. Nurture positive, loving thoughts towards the person you try to help instead of blame or shame. Only then can you say that you are the change you want to see in the world. And perhaps your new perspective and change of heart will create a positive impact and help them change.

You want to see happiness be happier

You want to see kindness be kinder

You want to see understanding be more loving.

This is the law of cause and effect.

Remember that now is your time to transform your life one step at a time.

If you do not improve, how can you expect others to change? There is always room for improvement.

I hope you enjoyed this episode:

Let me share one more time, the quote from Leslie Deschene for reflection

"No one changes

Unless they want to.

Not if you beg them.

Not if you shame them.

Not if you use reason,

emotion or rough love.

There’s only one thing that

makes someone change:

their own realisation that

they need to do it. And

there’s only one time

it will happen: when they

decide they’re ready."

 

I look forward to connecting with you next Monday. Have a fantastic week, take good care and lots of love.