Self-Care vs. Selfishness: Help Drawing the Line

Is the line “Nobody will care about you more than you care about yourself” actually true—or is it low-key toxic? Todd Bridges and Bettijo crack this one open in a real-life, couples-therapy-style convo about self-care vs. selfishness, how they set (and screw up) boundaries with their kids, and one tiny “mosquito” comment from Todd that sent Bettijo OVER. THE. EDGE.

SUMMARY

This week, Todd and Bettijo Bridges tackle a heavy-hitting statement Bettijo recently heard: “Nobody will care about you more than you care about yourself.” Bettijo shares that she wasn’t raised to believe this—her upbringing centered on service, sacrifice, and avoiding the dreaded label of being selfish or self-centered. Todd, on the other hand, thinks it’s absolutely true and argues that you have to take care of yourself first—emotionally, mentally, and physically—before you can pour into anyone else.

From there, the conversation dives into the tricky balance between prioritizing yourself and being perceived as selfish. Todd shares how he decides whether a request is a genuine need or just someone being lazy, emphasizing the importance of personal accountability. They also explore how this idea shifts when you’re parenting young kids versus adult children, and why setting boundaries in relationships is key to earning respect and appreciation.

Todd wraps up the episode with his “Todd Flix” recommendation: the Netflix show Lucifer, which he’s currently re-watching with Bettijo, who’s never seen it.

HIGHLIGHTS 

• Todd and Bettijo unpack the controversial idea she heard on Emme Grede’s Aspire podcast: “Nobody will care about you more than you care about yourself.” (1:34)
• Bettijo shares how her upbringing blurred the line between self-care and selfishness. (2:04)
• Todd explains why filling your own bucket is non-negotiable if you want anything left to give. (4:07)
• A mosquito-in-the-house moment hilariously reveals Todd’s approach to protecting his peace. (4:12)
• Todd defines the difference between being selfish and simply taking care of himself. (10:15)
• They break down how boundaries promote personal accountability. (14:50)
• Todd’s “Todd Flix” pick of the week: the Netflix series Lucifer. (19:05)
• Bettijo challenges Todd to go on Dancing with the Stars—and they debate their wildly different music tastes. (22:54)

LISTEN TO LEARN

• Self-care vs. selfishness: where’s the line?
• How to set boundaries when you’re a lifelong people-pleaser.
• Why your emotional and mental health have to come first.
• Todd’s take on  parenting adult kids with firm boundaries.

Don't wait for permission to put yourself first—you can't pour from an empty cup! Stop being a mosquito magnet and start setting boundaries right now by hitting Play!

Follow on Instagram:  Todd @toddbridges & Bettijo @pagingsupermom

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© 2025 Loop 101 Media

DANG! is produced by Loop 101 Media, Bettijo Bridges, Todd Bridges & Attalie Anne

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