Julie Legg speaks with clinical psychologist and ADHD specialist Bryan Gastelle. With both professional expertise and lived experience of ADHD, Bryan unpacks how neurodivergence impacts romantic relationships, communication patterns, emotional regulation, and household dynamics.
This conversation explores what healthy conflict really looks like, how couples can better support one another without falling into burnout or resentment, and why therapy doesn’t have to be a “last resort.” Bryan also shares practical tools, including the 5% Rule, for navigating emotional overwhelm, executive dysfunction, and relationship strain.
Key Points from the Episode:
- Why ADHD is often misunderstood, especially the inattentive type in adults
- How neurodivergence shows up in communication and daily relationship dynamics
- Common patterns when both partners have ADHD (and what to look out for)
- How neurotypical partners can support without slipping into rescuing or parenting roles
- What healthy conflict looks like and why “I” statements and validation matter
- The Four Horsemen of relationship breakdown (from the Gottman Method)
- Tips for suggesting therapy to a partner without triggering defensiveness
- Why a therapist trained in ADHD makes all the difference
- How to use the “5% Rule” to break down overwhelming tasks
- Why couples therapy can be a tune-up, not just a last resort
Links:
LINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/bryan-gastelle-719820a5/
WEBSITE: https://www.empowermytherapy.com/
INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/empowerpsychotherapyllc/
FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/EmpowerPsychotherapyllc
Thanks for listening.
📌 Don’t forget to subscribe for more tools for beautifully different brains.
🌐 WEBSITE: ADHDifference.nz
📷 INSTAGRAM: ADHDifference_podcast
📖 BOOK: The Missing Piece: A Woman's Guide to Understanding, Diagnosing and Living with ADHD
ℹ️ DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only. The views expressed are those of the guests and do not necessarily reflect those of the host or ADHDifference. Read More
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
Betrayal Season 5
Saskia Inwood woke up one morning, knowing her life would never be the same. The night before, she learned the unimaginable – that the husband she knew in the light of day was a different person after dark. This season unpacks Saskia’s discovery of her husband’s secret life and her fight to bring him to justice. Along the way, we expose a crime that is just coming to light. This is also a story about the myth of the “perfect victim:” who gets believed, who gets doubted, and why. We follow Saskia as she works to reclaim her body, her voice, and her life. If you would like to reach out to the Betrayal Team, email us at betrayalpod@gmail.com. Follow us on Instagram @betrayalpod and @glasspodcasts. Please join our Substack for additional exclusive content, curated book recommendations, and community discussions. Sign up FREE by clicking this link Beyond Betrayal Substack. Join our community dedicated to truth, resilience, and healing. Your voice matters! Be a part of our Betrayal journey on Substack.