Birth Mother Matters in Adoption Episode #44: Love & Loss in Adopt Reunification Part One
Believe it or not, I am an incredibly private person with what has become more and more a public persona. This transition for me is still new and at times still takes my breath away. I am beyond grateful to answer questions, share my story and open the door into the adoption world as well as into my own adoption backyard. Sometimes its easier to stay on the surface when talking about adoption rather than diving deep. I ask others who I speak with to dig deep, aim for the roots and I believe it is time for me to do the same. Some of what we will be discussing today we have touched on before; the logistics, the events and thoughts and feelings- but today we will hold no punches and spare no emotions.
During this process there are always highs and lows; things you find out that you never knew. Facts that may not have been important to someone else but life-changing for you.
What I have learned and continue to learn as I walk through my own adoption journey:
Its okay to do things in your own time.Don’t let others make you feel guilty; they haven’t walked your life journey (guy in airport condemned me for not telling my adoptive parents.)Learning your biological history doesn’t change the person you are, it only adds more layersAllow everyone to reach the acceptance stage in their own timeSome months you may have more contact than others and that’s okay and that doesn’t mean you aren’t as close or that something is wrong.
Whether you are adopted, adopt, or place a child for adoption, your journey does not end when the adoption is finalized, in fact your journey is just beginning.