January 8, 2026 • 58 mins
Brandon and Jesse kick this sesh off on a deceptively simple question that always turns into a whole thing, how do you actually show love, like real love, not Instagram love, not “I posted a quote so I’m healed” love. And it starts in the most Brandon way possible, food. Not “I heated something up,” food, but “I’m trying to give you an experience” food. The kind where mac and cheese is not allowed to be mid, and even the boxed stuff somehow ends up feeling like a flex because you refuse to let a meal be boring if you’re the one cooking.
That rolls right into the part nobody talks about, love languages sound cute until you realize people are basically running different operating systems. Some people hug, some people avoid feelings like it’s a sport, and some people show love by handing you something useful and acting like that counts as emotional intimacy. There’s a whole little riff on how weird the holiday season is too, because no matter what you believe, December has that “aura,” like the world collectively cosplays being nicer for a minute. This year hits different though, court stuff in the background, kids in town, then kids gone, the emotional whiplash of closeness and absence back to back.
Then you two take a hard left into the modern world being kind of… engineered. You talk about how life isn’t “scripted” like a conspiracy, but it is shaped, nudged, fed, and filtered. Algorithms decide what you see, what you fear, what you think “everyone” thinks, and suddenly we’re all yelling at each other like we’re defending our favorite sports team. The perfect dumb metaphor lands, “I’m Coke and you’re Pepsi,” and then immediately gets exposed for what it is, it’s sugar water with bubbles, why are we acting like this is a holy war. That’s the point, a lot of the division isn’t even about reality anymore, it’s about identity, dopamine, and what keeps people glued to their screens.
From there it gets real in that way you guys do, not preachy, just honest. You talk about how hiding parts of yourself is basically self-rejection dressed up as “protecting the relationship.” The fear sounds like, “If you see this part of me, you won’t love me.” And the truth is brutal and freeing, you’re not even letting yourself be loved if you’re always editing who you are. There’s also a solid moment of perspective from stepping away from rigid religion years ago, and realizing you’ve seen more closeness and acceptance since, not less. More room for people to be whole, messy, complicated, and still worth loving.
Save on Dr Dabber with Code: Cannabisschool10
Save on Storz & Bickel with Code : Cannabisschool
Save on Santa Cruz Shredder with Code: CSP10
Save on Bomb Erigs with Code: CSP
Score 100 on your test 😘 Save 25% with code cannabisschool25
🔥 Only What We’d Use Ourselves — our trusted, handpicked tools and resources. No fluff. Just the good stuff.
💡 Got thoughts? Questions?
Drop us a line — we actually read them.
Fuel the movement. Keep the conversation going.
📺 Subscribe on YouTube — smart content with zero judgment, one episode at a time.
📱 Stay Connected:
• 🌐 Website
• 🎵 TikTok
🎵 Episode Music Credits:
• Psalm Trees, James Berkeley - Ah Yeah 🎶 Listen Here
🛒 Cannabis Topics Covered: Cannabis education, best cannabis strains, cannabis podcast, cannabis effects, cannabis benefits, cannabis usage, THC vs. CBD, cannabis wellness, cannabis for energy, cannabis and relaxation, cannabis and creativity, hybrid cannabis strains, sativa vs. indica, terpenes explained, cannabis and mood enhancement, cannabis community trends, cannabis and road trips, and cannabis consumption methods.
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
I'm Brandon. And I'm Jesse, we're cannabis
school. Having cannabis infused
conversations. With everyday.
People. Cannabis companies.
Celebrities. And your mom?
Welcome to the sash. When we were at at this lunch
two years ago, no, it was a little over a year ago.
(00:20):
I just said to my siblings, I'm like, I don't know you fuckers.
And they were like, what? And I'm like, no, I don't know
you guys. Like you guys are talking about
things, which is cool. I mean, you guys have a
relationship, You guys are closetogether, but I don't know you
guys. So I'm just getting together
with people about as proper as abusiness lunch and which this is
(00:47):
the shitty thing, Brandon. Yeah.
I value my business lunches because I I am such an
inquisitive person. I'm so interested in how people
work and how they perceive the world and in me being a it's.
Connecting with that human. Well, but on top of it, it's
part of it's part of my coping mechanism that I do.
(01:09):
So ADHD is kind of that, you know, you could label, but I
like to put it on the Octagon side where I am all about
connection and people and I'm always about making sure that
everybody's happy around me. That's why I'm constant like, I
dude, I make good food. I know I make good food for my
family because I enjoy the process, but I enjoy people
(01:32):
enjoying food. Yeah, same.
You know right. I realized cooking for people is
one of my love languages. Like I love to cook something
and I. Don't want to just make some.
I don't want to heat it up and give it to you.
I want you to have an experience.
And I want it to be like, oh, I really like this.
Oh, hey, this was made special for me.
(01:53):
OK, cool. And Emily, be like, oh, why are
you making out your breakfast? I'm like, she's she's old enough
she can make her own. I'm like, yeah, but I also made
your breakfast like, I'm not. It's an act of love.
Yeah, I'm doing this not. Utility, yeah.
I want to do this because to me,I'm showing care and love for
the people that I care and love.Yeah.
And it's this act of like, hey, let me do something for you.
(02:16):
Right. And to me, it's not about like,
oh, you're capable of doing this.
Yeah, so are you. Like, I love and I love when she
helps me in the kitchen, too. It's not.
I'm opposed to that. Or when she offers to cook.
I just feel weird because then Igo, what am I supposed to do?
And she's like, we'll just sit there and I'm like, yeah, but.
And. And do what?
Like we go to anyone's house andit's dinner time and I'm like,
(02:40):
hey, can I help? What can I do?
Yeah. Because that's just who I am.
And so it's weird when I go anywhere and it's at someone's
kitchen, they're like just sit there and I'm like, OK, I, I
don't do well with that, but you're I'll.
Sit here. Yeah.
So I I know it's. And for other people, they don't
(03:02):
understand it. You know, my wife will cook at a
utility because you need to feedpeople.
Yeah. But when I cook, I'm cooking
because I'm like, oh, what experience?
Because I don't like it when somebody goes just make
whatever. Like, I will turn Mac and cheese
into a glorious meal if you allow me to.
Yeah. Like, I'll use heavy cream.
(03:24):
I'll use actual cheddar cheese and butter.
And I'm going to make this amazing for you.
I'm going to make a Roux. So it's really creamy.
I mean, and there's and then other people are just like, Nah,
just fucking box it. They just boil it, throw that
fucking yellow dye in there and then you know, it smells like
cheese. Fuck it, right?
(03:46):
And. I can't believe it's not cheese.
Yeah. Exactly.
And The funny thing is, is that there's other people that don't
appreciate that as much, so theyjust go, I don't fucking care.
Like I know the taste of synthetic food and I love it.
So it's like that guy in the Matrix, you know where he's
talking. He's like, I know this steak is
not real, but fuck, my brain loves it.
(04:08):
And and that's the only thing that you're doing it for.
It's to for your brain. You know you're doing it for the
pleasure. My you know what I realized
though, is my brain and my body like the better quality, they
like the better food. Everybody does like everybody
does. You can't tell me that.
Yeah, but when your body's so accustomed to the other, you
(04:28):
don't notice, and then it's hardfor you to eat the other because
your taste buds aren't accustomed to it.
And you go, oh, that's gross or I don't want to eat that.
Oh dude, like for example my mashed potatoes.
Apparently for my nephews is theonly mashed potatoes they'll
eat. Oh nice.
But The thing is, like my sister-in-law, she's just like,
(04:49):
I've tried making it the way youdo.
They're like, no, it's just not right.
What's the measurement? And I said, I don't have a
measurement. I do it by taste.
I do it because I'm like, well, what's the experience I'm
looking to give them? And that's these acts of love
that we do for other people. But then there's things that we
try to fool ourselves as acts oflove, right?
(05:12):
Can you expand on that? Yeah.
I was going to burp there. I was like I had to pause.
You're good. Yeah, Yeah.
I was like, we're burp, I'm going to hold that back.
So when we are acting only for areaction, a certain reaction.
Like a pre planned. Like, yeah, like.
(05:35):
Our mind has a. Like closing the sale before you
even had the conversation with the prospect, like they're not
even, they're not even prospective prospect.
They're a suspect. I used to say that all the time.
I'm like, they're not a prospect, They're a suspect.
Like I suspect that they would be a good prospect.
And then when we start having conversation about business, now
they're turning into a prospect.And then once the prospect
(05:58):
really enjoys what I have, then they turn into a client.
And I think sometimes we we try to shortcut it by love bombing
people. And it sounds such like a
negative thing, but it's not it.It's a coping mechanism that we
do because we didn't receive a certain amount of love or there
(06:19):
was some traumatic event in a relationship that happened,
whether it's parental or relational or romantic.
Whatever it is, whatever it is through our life growing up that
we feel inadequate in or unworthy of love or whatever it
is that we're. I don't even know if it's
consciously I It's been an interesting holiday season.
(06:39):
Yeah. I mean, just with court.
Oh yeah. Kids being here for a month
before, which was amazing, and then them being gone for
Christmas and stuff like it's, it's a weird time of the year
with that. Well, because the, the time of
the year, regardless of, you know, belief structure, anything
like that, there is an, there's an aura, an essence that's
(07:01):
typically around that. That means closeness.
That means that people kind of stop playing their petty games
and for one fucking day of the year they're nice to each other
at a Christmas party at your parents house eating dry ham,
You know you know what I'm talking about.
Or fucking funeral potatoes. At least Curtis smokes delicious
hams. No, no Curtis.
I mean, if if Curtis wasn't smoking it, it's going to be
(07:24):
dry, right. And that's one of the things
it's like that's way Curtis can show love is going.
Look, I really don't want to be all huggy with you.
Matter of fact, I don't want to fucking talk to you.
But I want you to know that I care about you.
And I, I put a lot of time and attention because I enjoy good
things and I want to share thesegood things with you.
(07:45):
And so instead of looking at people just as like grumpy
fuckers, you know, not everybody's on the same
wavelength. You know, I am very affectionate
physically and emotionally, spiritually, that's just how I'm
built. But I know that there's other
people that really don't like that, so I have to learn what
(08:05):
they are comfortable with. Yeah.
If a fist bump or a high 5 or a handshake is where they're at,
or maybe even a hand on the shoulder, then I need to, I, I
don't need to be offended if they're upset with me being that
way. I need to ask and it's a weird
ask, but it's really appreciated.
Oh yeah. It's it's like asking 100%.
(08:26):
Do you take sugar and cream withyour with your coffee?
Oh yeah. Instead of somebody just handing
you something going. Thank you.
Well. You think about it though, like,
yeah, we might not have the samebubbles because I'm a very
huggy, very affectionate, very caring person as you are.
But like our great friend, the great prophet Ruth, she's not
incredibly affectionate and I'veknown her for almost as long as
(08:50):
I've known Emily. So probably about six, 6 1/2
years now if I had to guess. And I probably given a Ruth
amount of hugs as I have fingers.
And that and you know, but. But it depends on the day.
And some days I'll go, hey, are you like, can I give you a hug?
And some days she's like, yeah, Another day she's like, Mike,
(09:11):
that's all right. A crisp high 5 like.
But the way she shows affection and this is very loving, and I
know she's going to laugh at this.
She gives good head. And what I mean by that is she
gives good cerebral. What she really enjoys is a
titillating conversation about something important or
(09:32):
fascinating. It can't be dry.
Like if you asked her about whatshe does, it's the last fucking
thing that she wants to talk about.
Her face will go. Oh yeah.
And she'll let you know. And if you're going to talk
about stupid shit, she better bereally high or really drunk
because she's not going to enjoyit.
She's going to be really annoyed.
(09:53):
That's why I used to joke aroundabout calling her Wednesday
Adams because she used to be so gloomy.
And I love that about her. Like she was surly she she is a
character to me that is like so real.
And I'm like, you belong in a cartoon or in a fucking sick com
because she was perfect for because she was raw.
(10:14):
And a lot of people hide behind the facade of, of technology or,
and there was a really good quote that I heard from
somebody. I'm not like a huge fan of
Jordan Peterson. Interesting.
And the only reason why it's just like I, I hate chastising
people, you know, Oh, go over there and make your bed.
(10:37):
That's how you're going to be a better man, right?
I don't, I don't care about that.
What I do like is the philosophical part.
And the thing that he said he goes be wary of knowledge that
you didn't work for. It made me think about the over
reliance that we have on technology to be it.
(11:00):
We we don't utilize it to be better communicators.
We do it to be able to fabricatecommunication now even more so
like I don't think that I can trust any e-mail nowadays to be
created by somebody like I actually write by now and then
I'll go, you know what? I think it needs a little
pizzazz chat help. Where, where is this strong?
(11:23):
Where is it weak? What would you suggest?
That's all I ask it for because I've really, I, I there was a
time where I relied on it to create solely.
Yeah, create. Not no direction really, other
than a few prompts. But then it was when I started
to have deeper conversations with myself because that's what
(11:44):
I needed to realize. I'm not talking to someone.
I'm talking to another consciousof me because I've created me
inside of it. And so as I start talking to it
more, I it starts being able to pull out a lot of my fallacies.
Interesting. So do you find yourself catching
yourself and a lot more of thosethrough talking with chat?
(12:07):
These realizations, yeah, because I, I try to, I put it in
a way I'm like, hey, you're in this mode.
I went into the settings and youcan change how it interacts with
you. Yeah.
And I like that. I never touched it before.
I solely went off of us developing this to our
interactions. But then I would find it overly
(12:28):
enthusiastic. And I'm like, hey, yeah, chill
the fuck out. You're not my therapist, you're
my alter ego. Oh, it's like, have you see
there's a South Park one with mykids showed it to me and they're
like all talking about the AI and everything that they talk to
or say to the AI, it's like, oh,that's a great idea, we should
(12:49):
do that. Like, you're so smart.
Yeah, I know, dude. And I'm just like, Oh my God.
That's a fantastic idea, Jesse, and you're quick to catch it.
Now let's go into it and we'll figure this out together.
I know and I'm just like OK. Stop stroking me, bro.
Yeah, but I'm done. Basically what it is.
And so then the women are like, he's always just talking to his
(13:10):
phone, how do we get him to do that?
And then they just start saying what the AI was doing, like, oh,
that's a great idea. You're really.
Smart, let's say, dude, one of the best things I love asking
it, especially like when I'm creating content or something
like that, or an idea based off of somebody's got this concept
or app or device or service and they're going, you know, what
(13:33):
can we do? And I, I take a lot of that time
that I spent in understanding consumer psychology and writing
and, and even topography and going where, what feeling am I
trying to convey to somebody? Because the way I'm talking now,
the way you're talking now, has not been provided by ChatGPT at
all, right? But this isn't scripted.
(13:55):
But damn it. But The thing is, is that a lot
of our lives are scripted because their interactions on
social media are optimized through AI are.
Algorithms everything like. 100%the algorithms I mean, that's
why you. See is because it's
intentionally fed to you becauseof a designed algorithm.
That's like, OK. And people believe that, well,
(14:16):
I'm on chat, it's just me and chat.
No, it's not. It is the new search engine.
So because that is like #1 search that comes up.
That's what people are striving for.
So unique content based solely on your, where your location is
and the type of customer you're trying to get to and how you
(14:38):
educate them, right. When you educate them, then now
all of a sudden they're like, Ohyeah, yeah, that makes sense.
Hence I do that. And so you're you're you're
striking dopamine with them. But the problem that I see that
with us being so into this is that we believe narratives that
are completely created instead of just based off what you're
(15:01):
seeing and experiencing. Right there comes division.
Because it is all manufactured. I'm Coke and your Pepsi.
Fuck you. Wait a minute, is this is sugar
water that bubbles? Yep.
But no, fuck that guy. Well, is that all you got?
(15:21):
Fucking heathens I'm out of. Here I was, who was I talking
to? I was talking to someone about
that lately. And I'm like, you know, I don't
know if it's Trump or who, what happened the last 8 to 10 years
of existence. It feels like there's been a lot
more hate that's been perpetuated, a lot more
extremism. What?
(15:42):
Do you mean by hate? Hate us and them like Oh no I
don't like extreme stuff of hatred towards the other sides
of like any difference you're different than me versus like
you just said, it's the same thing of like Pepsi and Coke.
Well, they're both just sugary water filled with shit.
(16:05):
No, totally. That's you and me.
We're both the same chemical breakdown.
We're both, you know, flabby flesh things filled with bones
and blood. Like we're the same thing.
We're just different. And it's looking at that going
like it's so weird how much there's this, this, it's just
competition. This oh, it's but that's life,
(16:26):
though. It is.
But it's weird and like I feel like there's been more of that
in the last eight years there where there's been more hatred
towards. And maybe I just was younger
that I wasn't so into the political climate or what was
going on around the globe, 'cause I know there's always
been hatred, but it feels like it's been just pushed to a
(16:48):
different level in some instances that I've been
disappointed to see. But at the same time, from me
and from people I know, I've also seen greater depths of love
that have been expressed becauseit's usually the yin to the
Yang. There is one, but there's also
another give. Me an example of of love, of new
(17:11):
love that you've seen. I mean, in the last eight years,
my, let's see, I probably left religion 13 years ago.
So in that 13 years though, I'vefound a lot more closeness, a
lot more acceptance of people, the ability to see the human,
not the flaws or shortcomings orhowever I was raised to see, you
(17:36):
know, some human versus seeing them and accepting and loving
them for the complete person they are the whole package of
this person. I love you despite this.
No, I I love you. I know.
What you're talking about? In spite of all of these things
like this doesn't change it. I love you because of all of
this. This is who create like what
makes this whole person is everybit of it.
(17:59):
And if if you're hiding like I'mworried I can't show this to you
because you won't love me. All right, I can't show this to
you because you won't love me. Well, you're not loving you and
you're not allowing me to love you because you're worried that
I'm going to judge the real version of you and go, man, that
real version of you, I'm better than that or you're that's not
(18:20):
worthy of love because we're always ashamed or fearful maybe
of like if I show this part of myself to these people, But a
lot of it I think is from childhood because it's, hey, I
showed up this way and I was picked on or teased or bullied
or whatever. And so instead of being loved
even from our parents on those deepest levels, you know, we
(18:40):
show up. And it's how many people have
fear of I can't show this to my friends, my partner, my kids,
my, my siblings, whatever it is,because I I'm fearful that that
version of me won't be loved. Well, that's your truest version
of you. And you're just being afraid of
that. But if you truly let that show,
(19:03):
they will learn to love you. If they truly love you, they'll
go. Yeah, no, I, I love that too.
Like, yeah, it might not be my favorite thing about you, but I
love you. Yeah, Like it.
We don't have to like everythingthat every single person does.
I can, I can, I totally get that, you know, and that's, you
know, both of us have have changed dramatically within the
(19:24):
last, I would say five years of us starting this podcast.
You know, our ideals and beliefshave completely changed.
And and that's the evolution of us, almost anybody who's going
to look inward, right? And I, and I get what you're
saying, like you can, it's all perspective and, and, but the
thing that I always try to caution on that one for myself
(19:46):
and, and anybody I would talk tois that I think of Rome, give
them the circus and give them bread.
And the reason why I say that isthat when we are allowed to
think that everything is wonderful, then we actually
start to retract in our progression.
Because what what I'm saying about the false self that most
(20:07):
of us live in the digital age isthat a lot of this division and
a lot of this self realization, if we can call it, is
manufactured 100%. Most of us are not awake to who
we are. Most of us don't have any
fucking clue what that means or even understand it.
(20:28):
We try to drown it with identitygoing oh, this is who I am.
It's the. Ego coming and going.
This is who I am, yes. This is how I'm divided from
you. Yeah, and yet the ego actually
has nothing to do with that. And it's no realizing that
going. All right.
When I take that out, who am I? What are my habits?
(20:49):
What are my patterns? What are my thoughts?
Like what is this collection that equals?
And then it becomes fictitious. It becomes this fictitious world
because that's the whole thing. Like, you know, before he'd like
human men will do something thatis just absolutely ridiculous,
right. This is what we used to think.
Human men would do anything, payanything to make their Dick
(21:09):
bigger, right. Yeah, legit.
Yep. But it's kind of a joke.
Like there was like one or two dudes like you would hear.
I like I was fascinated. I found it long ass time ago
where they they literally like skin your Dick like a banana and
then they put these weights. Oh, inside.
On top of it and they're pullingand it's supposedly supposed to
(21:32):
like lengthen it but like 1/4 ofan inch.
Just get better. Learn how to use your tongue.
Like. If you're trying to get 1/4
inch. But if you asked every woman,
yeah, there's going to be certain select women going.
No thanks. I've had Vienna's.
I'm not a fan. Right.
I'm a Cabasa girl. Like, cool, whatever.
(21:53):
Everybody's got a different flavor.
Whatever. That's cool.
Yeah. You know, it should be upset or
ashamed either way. Like if you don't like Coke then
don't drink it. Yeah, someone out there likes
coke. 100% micro Dick or not. Right, but that's not the
craziest fucking thing I've everseen.
The craziest fucking thing I've ever seen with this idea that
(22:15):
you need to become something that people really don't care
about. But the illusion online is
taller men are more sought after.
So you got mother fuckers that are drilling screws into their
shin and then they crank it every day.
Yeah, and they will make them. The dudes that are like 5-9 get
(22:37):
to 6 feet tall, but they walk around like I got a stick shoved
up their ass because you have altered the bones and now who
knows if they're going to break.Yeah, they've got medical prop.
Dude, you can't walk right for ayear.
You think of the structural change in damage that you've
done to that, which is not intended to do that.
(23:01):
No, you stop growing at a certain age because your genetic
code says BCS the limit. I think it.
Has in now in the like there's so much dating online and the
problem with dating online. You call it that.
Yeah, it's not even that. It's it's circus.
It's a circus. It's.
Ridiculous. And I think about it and like,
(23:24):
we would have days just hanging out as guys.
Like when Casey and Matt and Chad and I, we were all
roommates and we were just sitting there and it was like,
oh, what do you do? We're going to do a Tinder bomb.
Oh, no, like, all right, well, we better do some shots.
So take some shots and then go and Tinder.
You just push right a million times.
And it was like, Oh my God, Oh, no.
(23:45):
But like. So fucking pathetic.
But it's like, yeah, it's a terrible.
Yeah, it's just a waste of. Time it is.
I would rather play video games.I'd rather.
Go out, do something, engage with people.
I'd rather yeah, I'd rather playMonopoly.
It's the weirdest, like shopping, window shopping for
people. That's what it is and it sucks
(24:06):
window shopping because when youI don't go to the I don't like
going to the mall. I don't even like going to the
mall, even if like one of those things like we wanted to go guy
on the street, ask people. Questions.
Yeah, yeah. You know, which we still should
do. We just need to pick a really
fucking busy day and then go andlet's get baked and go ask
questions with with selfie sticks.
Yeah, and then release forms. But sorry, I got pulled off
(24:30):
track, Jesse. Yeah, we mixed hooch into this.
Oh, that's what's changed. OK, yeah, 'cause I'm like, kind
of giggly now. Oh, that's funny, 'cause I was
like, oh wow, this is a different experience.
It is a different experience. It's a pleasant segue.
It's like right into the head and it's forcing my eyes to
slant. It's like I'm wearing like a
(24:51):
taping. Yeah, it's like this.
Like I'm like this right now, dude.
It really feels like that. Well, my eyes are slanted
anyway, so it doesn't matter, right?
Yes. But the dating thing, dude, like
I used to think, like dating forme was old fashioned.
Like you met each other, you courted, you know, maybe there
(25:11):
was a. Met through a friend of a friend
or something. Yeah, yeah.
You met at work. At some, yes.
Right. I mean, there's all these
different weird ways you met each other at a party, but now,
like it's the most. But we are in a loneliness
epidemic right now. This is the stupid fucking
thing. OK, You can have a tick tock
videos of women going. We're all the good men.
(25:32):
And then they've got another opposite video.
As soon as you flick up, it's going to be a dude going.
I just want a woman to care about.
I I mean, guys have totally reverted to beta ISM meaning
that they can't even have a fucking spine or they can't
enjoy things that they enjoy. They had to change themselves in
order for them to finally get acceptance.
(25:54):
Like I've heard so many oh man, my wife, my girlfriend,
whatever. My boyfriend wouldn't accept if
I used weed. Yeah, I think it's there's a lot
of people that are. But that's your.
Choice fear of like their partner isn't going to accept,
but that was that was why I was so upfront with it with Emily,
(26:15):
because I'm like, I use this medicinally.
This is so much part of my life.I use this daily, multiple times
a day. And you have to understand that
this for me has impacted my lifeso greatly in the positive.
I don't think I will ever go away from that.
And so if you're going to be here, you have to understand
that that's going to be part of my life.
(26:37):
And that's just something you'regoing to have to be OK with if
you want to be part of my life. And it was just because my
ex-wife, at the end when we werebroken up and I was using it, it
was this whole different feelingof like, yeah, I'm feeling like
I'm having to kind of hide this.Yes, she knows I consume and it
helps, but I'm having to be, youknow, not the full version.
(26:58):
I'm not showing who I really am.Yeah, I'm having to hide this to
feel like I could be deserving of love.
Well, but I, you know, on that same thing, like I've become
more of a moral person than I ever have before.
And, and a lot of it I contribute to the deeper moments
like strains like this that we're smoking on hooch.
(27:22):
I I feel that I can be more introspective and less
egotistical as hallucinogens cando as a mild hallucinogen.
Cannabis is great for that. When you find those strains that
really can get you to that state, I tend to really push the
limits with it because I want topush myself.
(27:44):
I know that there is a like a shedding of skin in, in a matter
of speaking, right? When I'm able to shed my skin of
my ego, cause the ego is layers.It's not just something you
crack and you get out of. Because we're all egotistical in
one way or another, right? Whether you know, you know, we
could say like, like I was talking about the difference
(28:06):
between men and women on TikTok saying we're all the good men.
And then we got men over here going.
I would do anything to have a woman and but the belief on this
guy is like I'm not 6 feet tall,I don't have a six figure income
and and I don't have AI. Don't have the same value.
And then the woman's over here going, I don't give a shit about
any of that, but they're thinking like, well, I've slept
(28:28):
with a couple of dudes. You know what?
I'm I'm not a traditional woman,You know, I don't.
I don't. Both sides feel worthless in the
other's eyes. Right and.
Where's my value? Instead of going like hey we
could figure this out because a relationship is a growth
everyday like it it it there is no set it and forget it.
(28:49):
Yeah. Even the most submissive woman
or the most compassionate man, there's something there that
they're hiding from one another.Not a kink like kink comes from
openness. I think it's a fear of like the
eye of acceptance. I'm afraid to show you this fear
of. Loss.
I don't want to get broken up with and because I love what
(29:09):
we've built. And if I share this part, like
what if you don't like it and that's the straw that breaks a
camel's back? Yep.
Fear of loss, fear of control, both of them at the exact same
time. You are feeling it and you and
you're so afraid. And, and one of the things that
I've enjoyed about cannabis is that it's actually allowed me to
show more of me that's always wanted to be there.
(29:30):
I, I am, I am a, I'm a very spiritual man now than I ever
have been before. And everything has attributed to
it. My time with the LDS church even
up to now is still there. And I'm, I'm OK with what it is.
(29:50):
It's it's because I'm not tryingto create division in myself.
Yeah, right. And and I would be hypocritical
in that sense because I accept all people.
I really do. And I will help anybody add to
my ability. I don't care who you are, what
your religious or or political belief has nothing to do with
(30:12):
our interaction right now. And that's the sad part.
Is that because of this menu? I was just like getting a frog
in my throat. All this manufactured division,
like I have division in my family because they believe
something of me and I just don'tdeal with bullshit anymore.
(30:34):
If you're not OK with me in one way or another because you
believe who I am, OK. I don't need to go out of my way
to hurt myself to manufacture. You're upset with me with.
I don't understand, but I allow myself to feel it.
You know what I mean? Like I don't, I don't get upset
(30:56):
anymore. Like I told you about my
siblings. I'm like, I don't know you
fuckers. Like I really don't know you.
Like I got one sister who is fucking unfortunate lifelong
drug addict. Yeah.
Right for over 30 years. That's hard.
It's. Fucking hard.
And I'll tell you, you know, it's like, OK, whatever, that's
just who she is. If she needs me, I'm there.
(31:18):
But other than that, I would do that for anybody.
Yeah, you're giving her the samelove and respect that you would
any human, but you're not opening your home and your heart
deeper because you know what comes back to it.
Yep, and it's you invite them. Setting boundaries for
protection, honestly. And that's healthy.
And that's why I say even with like going to societal, you
(31:38):
know, regardless of whatever perceived value it is like I was
thinking about it on the way over here.
What is our lives driven by in our world, the whole world?
We're not just talking United States, we're talking the entire
world. The only reason we are driven is
to consume 100%. I don't I don't see like if
(32:02):
there was a really cool and it'sa cool idea And and I'll tell
you why. Do you remember those
billboards? Heaven or hell Yeah.
Do you know who who ran those? The Mennonites.
Interesting. And Mennonites are like the
Amish and they would buy those billboards and you would call
(32:23):
that number like my friend, his name is Lee.
He worked for Yes Co and that was his.
Client. Yeah, yeah.
And he said they always paid in cash and they always paid on
time. He's like, and I'm like, what
did they get it for? And he goes, why I wanted it.
So I called him one time and this guy Jebediah.
Of course of. Course.
(32:43):
Is there any of you that are notnamed Jebediah?
Just curious. Yeah, if you're listening to
this podcast. That's what you think?
Not well integrated into the community society culture.
So any help would be appreciated.
So Jebediah. So he called and Jebediah was
there and he was just the guy who talked to you and he goes,
(33:03):
what's on your mind, brother? And he's like, he's like, we had
this like 35 minute conversationabout me, huh?
And he just wanted to talk to meabout me.
And he goes, well, hey, you know, I wish the Lord to be able
to go with you throughout your day and your whole existence and
May God go with you. That's it.
(33:24):
Like that's it. They paid 5 grand per billboard
and they got a lot of them. We have to have someone sit and
just talk with you. All day, 24 hours a day.
I like that they take. Shifts to just talk to you and
it it goes back to the teachingsof Christ, right?
To those who are in prison, you visit them.
It doesn't always mean the physical prison, it also means
(33:46):
the internal prison. Prison too.
We're to visit. So we met a new friend.
That friend had a kid who's struggling, who's on suicide
watch. And I know that resonates with a
couple of you guys as well, and we're glad you're still here.
But when he was talking about that, even in that time, I was
(34:07):
talking to him about like, hang on, that's probably Emily or the
neighbor bringing it. That's fine, it's the neighbor.
Yeah, OK. But he was talking about the OR
I was talking to him about healing hikes and about
psilocybin, just micro dosing and walking in nature And that
feeling of feeling like a kid again.
(34:28):
Because going up on this hike where we got maybe a mile up
everything was so inspiring. The Moss, the rocks, the way the
water moved the trees, you know,the movement of the trees.
Every little thing was just so in capturing that we would just
(34:50):
we didn't make it hardly very far up the Canyon, but it took
us 3 hours to do. And is kid who's really
struggling. And when I say kid, he's like
23. He's a kid.
He's still a kid. He's struggling with wanting to
be here, finding a purpose, feeling like he has a reason to
exist reality. And and I just I offered like it
(35:13):
was a Hey, would you take my kid?
Like, I would love to take your kid on a hike and and do this
healing hike and just talk with him because yeah.
And it's that thing of like, youknow, the same thing as these
billboards of just connecting with people to connect to go,
hey. What a cool.
Thing you have purpose you have like you matter.
(35:35):
There is a reason and it and it's hard because not everyone
connects the same. No, it's this disconnected world
and you go like, how many times do you go to a group thing or
church or anywhere? How many people are just
disconnected on their phones, just staring at their screen,
surrounded by actual people theycould connect with.
(35:55):
And instead of any of us connecting, it's we're just
staring at our emotional support.
What tingles? It's, well, it's manufactured
dopamine. I mean, the, the, the whole
purpose of it at first was utility.
Like you think about it, the phones before, like the most
advanced phone you had was the BlackBerry.
Yeah. Right.
I mean, you could get your e-mail on there like mother, but
(36:19):
what? Like my sidekick?
I could get the Internet. No, I could get pictures.
I could get Google. I could do Internet on my old
Nokia brick phone. It was really shitty and it took
forever and it was like, yeah, but dude, you.
Had the Internet? Oh.
My gosh. Yeah.
Like we. Were so impressed.
Yeah, and now I'm like this emotional sport rectangle.
(36:43):
And that's what I realized because a lot of it, I go to
places and I'm like, I really love the real connection, the
hanging out. And I feel so much more full
when it's a real connection because otherwise it does feel
like business meetings. Hey, how's your week been?
What's the weather like? How are you kids?
Yeah. What's your husband like?
(37:04):
You're working on any projects? OK.
What movies have you watched did?
You go to church this week, Do. You play games, we check all
the. Boxes.
OK. All right.
Well, we'll see you in a couple more weeks.
Yeah, I'll see you in a fucking year.
They get, it's a weird disconnect and you don't feel
rejuvenated or full. And like sometimes life's heavy
(37:25):
and we have friends that we're there for because we love them
and that's why we're there and their life can be heavy, but
like not everyone's is. And it's, it's nice to have that
real connection because like a real hug, a real like
conversation sitting across fromsomeone, like really looking in
and connecting with them. It's different.
(37:47):
It's not the same. It's you can send a, have a
million Facebook friends or Instagram followers or whatever.
Yeah. But at the end of the day, like,
what does that equate to as far as like mental being, mental
Wellness? Dude, let's just call it what it
is. It's just masturbation and
digital form. I mean, all you're doing is
jerking yourself off. Oh, I got more followers.
(38:08):
Like, if you've got a business attached to it, I understand
that. I totally understand that.
But if you're just some random pimply face kid who's having a
real hard time connecting with the world and you start
pretending to be something that you're not?
Or if that's how you find connection, because right now
that is truly all you find connection in because you are
very disconnected, Maybe that's a good place to start.
(38:31):
And that's where that's one of the things that I like about
cannabis too, is that it puts you in a place of discomfort at
first. Like when you have a lot, it
puts you in a place of discomfort and you got to
fucking figure your shit out because it's not going away.
You didn't learn that. Yet do you think it's the lack
of control? It it is.
You have time. Doesn't feel real time, feels
like. It's gone, yeah.
(38:51):
Really weird concept and structure and.
Because we're in a different type of reality.
Song was 3 hours long. No, it was like 3 minutes, but
it just felt like 3 hours, you know, or like distances.
And you're like, man, my arms feel like they're crazy short or
really long. They're like whatever it is that
you're like, I don't feel normal.
I don't feel in control. This doesn't feel like reality.
(39:13):
And you're having to sit back and go, no, I'm OK, this is OK.
I'm just, this is not normal. I'm not used to this and I have
to go. Am I actually OK or am I just
feeling weird because this isn'tnormal for me and honestly the
first several times it was, it was not normal.
But it was a, you know, but the,the thing that I enjoy, I, I
(39:37):
loved, you know, at the time when cannabis came into my life,
I was still doing mixed martial arts and then I was still
teaching and all that stuff. And one of the things that I, I
loved about it was that it actually took away control.
And I, I couldn't it back then, I couldn't describe what my
(39:57):
first experiences, my true experiences with cannabis, not
just smoking it randomly at a party or something like that,
like really just in it. And when I got those first vape
pens from you, like dude, it felt like getting choked out
because for me, getting choked out first, it's fucking
(40:19):
frightening. But when you let go.
You know it either way, you're going to wake up, you're going
to wake up. So don't don't worry like if get
out if you can, but if you can't, there's no shame in
tapping and or just waking up. Like don't have to freak out
(40:40):
when you wake up going fuck got caught, didn't I?
Because that was an awesome feeling for me when you would
catch somebody in a choke, whichis like a real dangerous thing.
But to me it was it was very philosophical too, because when
you're choking somebody, you youhold life in your hands.
(41:02):
Yeah, literally. And you can choose to take it or
just pause it. And when you pause it, you, you
understand the feeling that you're transmit even in that.
And, and, and if you're, if you're a, the reason why people
kill each other that way is because they've never trained
(41:22):
it. And when you don't train it,
such as training your mind to beable to slowly adapt to
cannabis, because if you just goall in, then you can develop a
super high tolerance. Well, or just really bad panicky
states at the beginning versus if you were to able to have a
really nice smooth introduction into it, you could get to those
(41:45):
points where you're having higher doses later, but it
doesn't have to be right at first.
You could just have a smooth ride the whole way.
Absolutely. Like they're yes, people talk
about, hey, you have to ride it out or you have to do this.
Why? You don't have to have a bad
experience. Like it's like going, hey,
you're riding down this hill on this bike.
Your bike has brakes, but you don't have to use them because
(42:08):
this is a rite of passage to just have to ride down and slam
into the wall at the end. Well, and and that's.
How? Just take the brakes the whole
way down. And and that's the other thing,
like kind of taking it back to, you know, the, the origin of our
conversation, right? This manufactured division that
we have created for ourselves because before there were no
(42:29):
real, like, growing up in the 90s, we'll just take gay, gay
kids, Right. I knew gay kids in high school.
But even though some were complete assholes and they were
just Dicks to them because you're different, everybody else
just knew they were different. But they didn't bring it up.
Yeah. You were friends with them
(42:50):
regardless. Yeah, it was.
Same in the Navy. There was some gay guys in my
boot camp division. Totally right.
No one was hiding it there. Very prissy.
Yeah. But yet they didn't get beat up
like in the movies. Oh no, they they were just like,
fuck, I guess that guy's. Gay.
I went to LDS based private school and there were two dudes
(43:11):
there that presented as gay and it wasn't still super big at the
time. They didn't come out and go I'm
gay but they were flamboyant as fuck.
Like you could tell. Yeah, but that's OK because they
were just different. Like I knew, OK, yeah, they're
probably gay. They're not trying to put it in
my butt. They're not trying to climb on
top of me, pin me down and make out with me.
(43:32):
They're not making me feel uncomfortable at all.
Why the hell would I care? No.
And that's the thing like there is there's no reason to care and
and because the reason why is there was no manufactured reason
to care. Did you you, you grew up here
and you said you experienced a lot of racism?
Yes, I grew up. I was white, but I had Hispanic,
(43:53):
Native American. Oh, it's where I live.
Black kids, I had everyone as friends because to me they were
just people. Well, you can understand too,
like where I was at. Like I had to think back to it
because you had a very differentexperience because of where you
were at. It was in this hyper religious
bubble area within Utah County. Provo even more so.
(44:15):
Right. Like everybody thought Salt Lake
was it like. But I even Provo I never even
thought about it. No, because that's just the way
you were. In Grandview, I never thought
about it being the rich neighborhood either because to.
Me. No, it's just where you grew up.
Grandview. It wasn't nice or fancy.
It wasn't the east side of town where the big nice homes by the
temple were. It was Grandview.
(44:35):
Yeah, did that was rich that's. Rich.
Exactly. So then when that's where we
like, we moved from here to the East side, and then it was like,
oh, OK, well, now I don't. Everyone called me rich on
Grandview. Yeah, but I've never felt rich.
We felt poor. Dude, when I had a house in
Grandview, yeah, like I talked to friends like back in high
school or something at the time,and they're like, where do you
live in? So I live in Grandview Hill.
(44:56):
And they go, oh. Yeah, and I'm like.
What are you talking about? It's a fucking hill.
That's it, that's it. It's not like it goes into Orem,
like it's not that big of a deal.
It was orchards and small stuff.There was like a tiny little
area where there were like a fewkind of rich homes.
Mm Hmm. Great couple.
Yeah, just a few. Yeah, some average and then some
(45:18):
above average. But a lot of is is small amount.
But at the same time, so Emily was just, we were watching my
family videos and that growing up and there's the video of us
building the very first home that we built and I'm like 2.
And Emily was like, you have A2 car garage.
And I was like, yeah, every homein the neighborhood had a 2 car
(45:42):
garage at least some even had a three car garage.
Like it wasn't as often, but. Yeah, those are few.
Every home had one. And I was like, I just, I didn't
know any about it different. It was just the world I grew up
in. And that home was the smallest
home I had lived in growing up. And yet that was still larger
(46:03):
than a lot of the other homes that people grew up in.
And I didn't know it because to me it was just a home.
Nothing else was fancy or extravagant.
I didn't live in a lavish life. So I just, I don't know, it's
this weird difference of certainperspectives and then seeing
someone else and them going, oh,you lived here, you did this.
(46:24):
Well, yeah, because people were considered part of a class.
Yeah, right. I mean, we haven't escaped
classism. People.
We, we class each other. Like there was a place in Orem
they called Pork Chop Hill. Why?
Because that's where all the cops lived, huh?
They literally moved around eachother because they weren't
accepted in community sometimes.Wow.
So they all live by. I had a friend, King Kawi.
(46:45):
He's old Hawaiian dude. And he, he worked for me when I
worked at the state hospital forso long.
And I was his direct supervisor.And he's like, yeah, I grew up.
I came out there from Honolulu. And, you know, we has a cop in
in Orem. And I mean, he talked about like
it was crazy. It was just crazy.
But you know. I love that big Hawaiian Samoan
(47:07):
community. Dude like the coolest Tim.
They were at Tim View, I was friends with them, I was
randomly friends with all sorts of groups, but not enough that I
hung out with them regularly. I just was like.
You just hang out with random people.
Yeah, and I'd be at any of them.And there was this kid who was
just a Dick and he decided to whitewash me my freshman year.
(47:30):
What? Yeah, no reason why.
Just being an asshole. That's not cool.
And because he was bigger than me, I was this tiny little kid.
So this moans grabbed him because they saw him and they
were friends with me. They grabbed him, multiple of
them, and they whitewashed the shit out of him.
And I was like, all right, Well,it just, that's such good
(47:50):
people. You know, it's so funny that
it's like this. Really awesome.
I mean, this never ruined my relationship with Polynesian
people, but my youngest, why? I got into martial arts first
grade and this Polynesian kid just bullied the shit out of me
and every Reese's, he would grabme by my jacket and throw me and
(48:13):
then he would push me aside because I like this one girl and
she would talk to me and he liked her.
So he's just like chunk No, like, right.
And that's how he just fucked meup.
And my dad was so mad because hegrew up very machismo in, in, in
Mexico. So everybody fought at the time
in Mexico City. Like it's any different now, but
(48:37):
it's just different. My dad grew up in a very
different time. Like Mexico today doesn't look
like anything he grew up with. Oh no, like only imagine.
Not like people who grew up in New York City.
It's still New York City. Oh yeah.
Not like dirt streets and yeah, no.
Cobbles. Tiny shanties and stuff, Yeah,
yeah. Like they, they didn't have like
a working shower. They just poured water out each
(48:57):
other. Like I, I kind of wish that I
lived like that because the luxuries of life kind of make us
soft, right? But moments, yeah.
Yeah, I don't know why. That was like a Bear Bear Grylls
moment there, right? Yeah.
The only way you can survive is getting the water out of camel
dung. Right, just set up a shower
Outback. Yeah, you know, it's right by
(49:17):
the road and everyone gets a show coming into the community,
haha. I knew it was small.
Like jokes on you, it's always small.
It's been fun. But you know, I, I, the thing
I'm, I, I think about right now,and I was thinking about it on
the way over here, is that if wecan let go of that weird
(49:38):
stranglehold that we believe that other people perceive us in
some way. Like the honest reason, like why
I love cannabis so much is that I'm just an easygoing guy and I
love to learn about people so much that I became in a way,
like a a minor expert in behavioral science because I
just, it's not that I go ha ha. I know how you feel.
(49:59):
It's like, OK, cool. Now I can understand how you
feel. And now I can get my ego out of
the way and now I can try to make sure that we have a
connection here because I enjoy being around other people.
And I'm aware that you may not like or even appreciate the same
things that I do. And that's OK.
(50:20):
That's OK That I don't like the same things that you do, but I
can appreciate what you like. Yeah.
Or that you find enjoyment and stuff from that.
Yeah. That's that's why I've loved 12
shapes. That's why I've, I've really got
in paralinguistics and kind of created a quasi one of my own.
That's a simpler 1. But I'm just like, you know, I
just want to understand and lovepeople for who they are because
(50:43):
I've become more aware. I was more I, I, I was more
selfish before because I was consumed at the belief of what I
needed to be so much that I cared so much about what I
wanted to be that I gave up a ton.
I gave up so much time. And it's not that I'm like, oh
(51:04):
crap, I can't get this back. Fuck it, they're gone.
I don't care. I can't cry about that last
breath I took. It was just the last breath I
took. It didn't mean it was the end.
It was just that's gone. So now I can learn from it.
It just makes future ones more precious or going oh.
I savor the moments. More.
(51:25):
Yes, exactly. It's kind of like when we were
teenagers, you didn't give a shit what the food tastes like,
you were just excited to eat it.Yeah.
And then now you appreciate the food.
Well, it's even I've been thinking about it too, every
time I drive around. Like I went down Texas this last
month and as flat as fuck, there's no mountains.
(51:45):
I miss the mountains. I am always in awe even as I
drive around every day and I'm admiring the mountains.
I'm like, man, these are beautiful.
I just, I love how they're shaped like the, just the
details, the the nature, everything around it and just
always awe inspired being surrounded by mountains.
(52:07):
And it's just when I was young, I never really cared or noticed
or like it was like, oh, they'rejust here.
It's what I know. And as I got older and used
cannabis, it was like, man, these are incredible.
Yeah, isn't that funny? The plant draws you to the
plants because when you're when you when you're in survival, do
you even care about what? And he thinks.
(52:30):
Because guess what the other person's thinking, Oh my God,
I'm just trying to survive. And then when you see other
people, it's not like kill them,they're trying to survive, you
know, right, Because that's, that's the way that we have been
manufactured to hate each other,right?
And it's, it's just manufacturedlike when you understand, like
this is one thing that I've, I've realized becoming very in
(52:51):
touch with, with what I considerGod, you know, whatever you
consider, that's fine. I, I, I accept all of that.
But for me and, and what I believe and what helps drive me
is, is that connection and it's letting go of what I need more
of what can I do to serve? And serving doesn't mean like,
(53:11):
oh wait, hand and foot on you. It's more on the side of how can
I, how can I use whatever I havebeen given, whatever I know
Yeah, to help you in any way, shape or form.
It's not me being a would be considered a.
No, it's, it's giving the skillsand the expertise that you have.
(53:32):
Yeah, it's needed. Like my dad called me up going,
hey, grandma has shocks again. OK.
I made her a tincture, gave her a specific dosing and that and
took it down to her. And now she's probably doing.
Great and yeah and her shocks have been way reduced.
She can last for like 5 hours off of 1/2 a tincture dropper.
And yeah. And I'm like so stupid simple
(53:52):
things like that or someone elsewas like, hey, my dad has cancer
and he's got back pain and he doesn't want to use this and I
made him a pain cream, sent thatout again.
Like there's these really simplethings that we can do to just
serve other people that it's. And and it doesn't need to
necessarily be attached to how much is it going to cost me
time, money again, Go smoke someweed and help yourself out
(54:14):
because I don't care. I don't care.
And I've let go of that idea. Like, you know, we had some shit
come up it just recently. And a gift of mine was some
money from my mother, right? Yeah.
And I was very grateful for it. My dad got me socks and a pair
of shoes. I was super grateful for a pop.
It was awesome for work and I had to use the money to get some
(54:38):
like gas and food and my wife's like, oh, don't use that.
I'm like, it's just money. I don't care about.
It doesn't bother me. It's not like, Oh well, it's for
me to do this. I mean, the only thing I asked
for was the newest version of the of the Bible, not the King
James Bible Bible, right? And so.
A newer translation, yeah, it's.Pretty cool all the Dead Sea
(55:00):
Scroll stuff in it, It's very awesome.
Does it have the apocrypha in there or the Dead Sea Scrolls do
not include all the apocrypha? I think this one does include
the apocrypha. I think it's after the New
Testament. It's typically where it falls in
line. OK, so it'll be the Old
Testament, New Testament, and then the Apocrypha.
And there's some of them that aren't in there.
There's so many, right? Like the book of Thomas, they're
(55:21):
like, oh, but it's basically just a collections of sayings
that Jesus said. So it's not necessarily
something that is new and it waswritten well after.
So it's just, it's just more. Interesting to have.
It's just, and that's why like, you know, Enoch doesn't
necessarily go with the canonized scripture because it
doesn't fall in line with that one, but it's still considered a
(55:43):
part of it. And that's what the Apocrypha
is. So it just means different.
That's what all it means. The different books.
Yeah, the different books. Right.
So funny. Like it does like like like a.
Fuck, we got the books and the different books.
Yeah, as I'm like, oh, these arethe evil books like whatever.
But it's this idea that, man, when we are more in touch with
(56:05):
our more primal selves and and meaning that we've let go of the
shedding of materialism. And I know it sounds so Foo Foo,
but the idea is, is that I care more about that.
I'm not saying like you can't get nice things, just saying
like you can get nice things. But if they break or get stolen
or they disappear or they burn with the house, they're just
(56:26):
things. Yeah, they they don't hold
importance. A thing can always be replaced.
100% that's why the relationships are so important
and and why, you know, 12 shapeswas such a huge thing for me is
that I find this amazing system that helps me to understand
other people in a little bit on the behavior side.
And what I can do at first is not going well, let me tell you
(56:48):
about your childhood, you know, like no, it's on the side of
going, Oh, I understand that maybe being around a lot of
people right now is not comfortable for you.
You know what I'm going to offeryou a respite.
Hey, you want to go outside? They're like, yes.
Yeah, cuz you don't see it too sometimes you like.
Oh yeah. But you can.
And when you can hear and tonality and stuff like that,
(57:09):
those are the things, the reasons why I've learned those
things and, and try to adapt into everyday life is that I
just want to understand other people so I can help them feel a
little bit more comfortable. Because for me, my need is
connection. Yeah, it's a selfish need.
I think everyone, like every human, has that need.
We just sometimes different wavelengths, Yes.
And we don't realize it as well sometimes because maybe we don't
(57:33):
always have that need met. Maybe smoke a little weed, think
about what you need. Yeah.
And, you know, some real connection.
And you know, you might have a test coming up.
It's true. And even though Schedule 3
started the process doesn't meanit's legal, people.
It's not. You might still need to pass a
test now and then. Yeah, and you need to be smart.
(57:54):
You need to get 100. You do.
In the temperature needs to be close to 100.
Yeah, maybe like 9898.6 roughly.We got a perfect study buddy
that'll help you hit that perfect temperature and that
perfect score every time. Yeah, Synthetics 5 has produced
some of the best synthetic urineout there to help you pass
tests. Yep, we don't know why, but
(58:15):
there's a code below that'll save you a little bit.
So absolutely. So save yourself 50,060 thousand
85,000. Yeah, however much it is that
you might make in a year. And check the show notes below
for all the other links, just count on stores and pickle our
favorite bomb ear rigs or DoctorTAVR products.
(58:37):
But love you guys. Take care.
I'm Brandon. And I'm Jesse, we're cannabis
school. Having cannabis infused
conversations. With everyday.
People. Cannabis companies.
Celebrities. And your mom?
Welcome to the sash. When we were at at this lunch
two years ago, no, it was a little over a year ago.
(00:20):
I just said to my siblings, I'm like, I don't know you fuckers.
And they were like, what? And I'm like, no, I don't know
you guys. Like you guys are talking about
things, which is cool. I mean, you guys have a
relationship, You guys are closetogether, but I don't know you
guys. So I'm just getting together
with people about as proper as abusiness lunch and which this is
(00:47):
the shitty thing, Brandon. Yeah.
I value my business lunches because I I am such an
inquisitive person. I'm so interested in how people
work and how they perceive the world and in me being a it's.
Connecting with that human. Well, but on top of it, it's
part of it's part of my coping mechanism that I do.
(01:09):
So ADHD is kind of that, you know, you could label, but I
like to put it on the Octagon side where I am all about
connection and people and I'm always about making sure that
everybody's happy around me. That's why I'm constant like, I
dude, I make good food. I know I make good food for my
family because I enjoy the process, but I enjoy people
(01:32):
enjoying food. Yeah, same.
You know right. I realized cooking for people is
one of my love languages. Like I love to cook something
and I. Don't want to just make some.
I don't want to heat it up and give it to you.
I want you to have an experience.
And I want it to be like, oh, I really like this.
Oh, hey, this was made special for me.
(01:53):
OK, cool. And Emily, be like, oh, why are
you making out your breakfast? I'm like, she's she's old enough
she can make her own. I'm like, yeah, but I also made
your breakfast like, I'm not. It's an act of love.
Yeah, I'm doing this not. Utility, yeah.
I want to do this because to me,I'm showing care and love for
the people that I care and love.Yeah.
And it's this act of like, hey, let me do something for you.
(02:16):
Right. And to me, it's not about like,
oh, you're capable of doing this.
Yeah, so are you. Like, I love and I love when she
helps me in the kitchen, too. It's not.
I'm opposed to that. Or when she offers to cook.
I just feel weird because then Igo, what am I supposed to do?
And she's like, we'll just sit there and I'm like, yeah, but.
And. And do what?
Like we go to anyone's house andit's dinner time and I'm like,
(02:40):
hey, can I help? What can I do?
Yeah. Because that's just who I am.
And so it's weird when I go anywhere and it's at someone's
kitchen, they're like just sit there and I'm like, OK, I, I
don't do well with that, but you're I'll.
Sit here. Yeah.
So I I know it's. And for other people, they don't
(03:02):
understand it. You know, my wife will cook at a
utility because you need to feedpeople.
Yeah. But when I cook, I'm cooking
because I'm like, oh, what experience?
Because I don't like it when somebody goes just make
whatever. Like, I will turn Mac and cheese
into a glorious meal if you allow me to.
Yeah. Like, I'll use heavy cream.
(03:24):
I'll use actual cheddar cheese and butter.
And I'm going to make this amazing for you.
I'm going to make a Roux. So it's really creamy.
I mean, and there's and then other people are just like, Nah,
just fucking box it. They just boil it, throw that
fucking yellow dye in there and then you know, it smells like
cheese. Fuck it, right?
(03:46):
And. I can't believe it's not cheese.
Yeah. Exactly.
And The funny thing is, is that there's other people that don't
appreciate that as much, so theyjust go, I don't fucking care.
Like I know the taste of synthetic food and I love it.
So it's like that guy in the Matrix, you know where he's
talking. He's like, I know this steak is
not real, but fuck, my brain loves it.
(04:08):
And and that's the only thing that you're doing it for.
It's to for your brain. You know you're doing it for the
pleasure. My you know what I realized
though, is my brain and my body like the better quality, they
like the better food. Everybody does like everybody
does. You can't tell me that.
Yeah, but when your body's so accustomed to the other, you
(04:28):
don't notice, and then it's hardfor you to eat the other because
your taste buds aren't accustomed to it.
And you go, oh, that's gross or I don't want to eat that.
Oh dude, like for example my mashed potatoes.
Apparently for my nephews is theonly mashed potatoes they'll
eat. Oh nice.
But The thing is, like my sister-in-law, she's just like,
(04:49):
I've tried making it the way youdo.
They're like, no, it's just not right.
What's the measurement? And I said, I don't have a
measurement. I do it by taste.
I do it because I'm like, well, what's the experience I'm
looking to give them? And that's these acts of love
that we do for other people. But then there's things that we
try to fool ourselves as acts oflove, right?
(05:12):
Can you expand on that? Yeah.
I was going to burp there. I was like I had to pause.
You're good. Yeah, Yeah.
I was like, we're burp, I'm going to hold that back.
So when we are acting only for areaction, a certain reaction.
Like a pre planned. Like, yeah, like.
(05:35):
Our mind has a. Like closing the sale before you
even had the conversation with the prospect, like they're not
even, they're not even prospective prospect.
They're a suspect. I used to say that all the time.
I'm like, they're not a prospect, They're a suspect.
Like I suspect that they would be a good prospect.
And then when we start having conversation about business, now
they're turning into a prospect.And then once the prospect
(05:58):
really enjoys what I have, then they turn into a client.
And I think sometimes we we try to shortcut it by love bombing
people. And it sounds such like a
negative thing, but it's not it.It's a coping mechanism that we
do because we didn't receive a certain amount of love or there
(06:19):
was some traumatic event in a relationship that happened,
whether it's parental or relational or romantic.
Whatever it is, whatever it is through our life growing up that
we feel inadequate in or unworthy of love or whatever it
is that we're. I don't even know if it's
consciously I It's been an interesting holiday season.
(06:39):
Yeah. I mean, just with court.
Oh yeah. Kids being here for a month
before, which was amazing, and then them being gone for
Christmas and stuff like it's, it's a weird time of the year
with that. Well, because the, the time of
the year, regardless of, you know, belief structure, anything
like that, there is an, there's an aura, an essence that's
(07:01):
typically around that. That means closeness.
That means that people kind of stop playing their petty games
and for one fucking day of the year they're nice to each other
at a Christmas party at your parents house eating dry ham,
You know you know what I'm talking about.
Or fucking funeral potatoes. At least Curtis smokes delicious
hams. No, no Curtis.
I mean, if if Curtis wasn't smoking it, it's going to be
(07:24):
dry, right. And that's one of the things
it's like that's way Curtis can show love is going.
Look, I really don't want to be all huggy with you.
Matter of fact, I don't want to fucking talk to you.
But I want you to know that I care about you.
And I, I put a lot of time and attention because I enjoy good
things and I want to share thesegood things with you.
(07:45):
And so instead of looking at people just as like grumpy
fuckers, you know, not everybody's on the same
wavelength. You know, I am very affectionate
physically and emotionally, spiritually, that's just how I'm
built. But I know that there's other
people that really don't like that, so I have to learn what
(08:05):
they are comfortable with. Yeah.
If a fist bump or a high 5 or a handshake is where they're at,
or maybe even a hand on the shoulder, then I need to, I, I
don't need to be offended if they're upset with me being that
way. I need to ask and it's a weird
ask, but it's really appreciated.
Oh yeah. It's it's like asking 100%.
(08:26):
Do you take sugar and cream withyour with your coffee?
Oh yeah. Instead of somebody just handing
you something going. Thank you.
Well. You think about it though, like,
yeah, we might not have the samebubbles because I'm a very
huggy, very affectionate, very caring person as you are.
But like our great friend, the great prophet Ruth, she's not
incredibly affectionate and I'veknown her for almost as long as
(08:50):
I've known Emily. So probably about six, 6 1/2
years now if I had to guess. And I probably given a Ruth
amount of hugs as I have fingers.
And that and you know, but. But it depends on the day.
And some days I'll go, hey, are you like, can I give you a hug?
And some days she's like, yeah, Another day she's like, Mike,
(09:11):
that's all right. A crisp high 5 like.
But the way she shows affection and this is very loving, and I
know she's going to laugh at this.
She gives good head. And what I mean by that is she
gives good cerebral. What she really enjoys is a
titillating conversation about something important or
(09:32):
fascinating. It can't be dry.
Like if you asked her about whatshe does, it's the last fucking
thing that she wants to talk about.
Her face will go. Oh yeah.
And she'll let you know. And if you're going to talk
about stupid shit, she better bereally high or really drunk
because she's not going to enjoyit.
She's going to be really annoyed.
(09:53):
That's why I used to joke aroundabout calling her Wednesday
Adams because she used to be so gloomy.
And I love that about her. Like she was surly she she is a
character to me that is like so real.
And I'm like, you belong in a cartoon or in a fucking sick com
because she was perfect for because she was raw.
(10:14):
And a lot of people hide behind the facade of, of technology or,
and there was a really good quote that I heard from
somebody. I'm not like a huge fan of
Jordan Peterson. Interesting.
And the only reason why it's just like I, I hate chastising
people, you know, Oh, go over there and make your bed.
(10:37):
That's how you're going to be a better man, right?
I don't, I don't care about that.
What I do like is the philosophical part.
And the thing that he said he goes be wary of knowledge that
you didn't work for. It made me think about the over
reliance that we have on technology to be it.
(11:00):
We we don't utilize it to be better communicators.
We do it to be able to fabricatecommunication now even more so
like I don't think that I can trust any e-mail nowadays to be
created by somebody like I actually write by now and then
I'll go, you know what? I think it needs a little
pizzazz chat help. Where, where is this strong?
(11:23):
Where is it weak? What would you suggest?
That's all I ask it for because I've really, I, I there was a
time where I relied on it to create solely.
Yeah, create. Not no direction really, other
than a few prompts. But then it was when I started
to have deeper conversations with myself because that's what
(11:44):
I needed to realize. I'm not talking to someone.
I'm talking to another consciousof me because I've created me
inside of it. And so as I start talking to it
more, I it starts being able to pull out a lot of my fallacies.
Interesting. So do you find yourself catching
yourself and a lot more of thosethrough talking with chat?
(12:07):
These realizations, yeah, because I, I try to, I put it in
a way I'm like, hey, you're in this mode.
I went into the settings and youcan change how it interacts with
you. Yeah.
And I like that. I never touched it before.
I solely went off of us developing this to our
interactions. But then I would find it overly
(12:28):
enthusiastic. And I'm like, hey, yeah, chill
the fuck out. You're not my therapist, you're
my alter ego. Oh, it's like, have you see
there's a South Park one with mykids showed it to me and they're
like all talking about the AI and everything that they talk to
or say to the AI, it's like, oh,that's a great idea, we should
(12:49):
do that. Like, you're so smart.
Yeah, I know, dude. And I'm just like, Oh my God.
That's a fantastic idea, Jesse, and you're quick to catch it.
Now let's go into it and we'll figure this out together.
I know and I'm just like OK. Stop stroking me, bro.
Yeah, but I'm done. Basically what it is.
And so then the women are like, he's always just talking to his
(13:10):
phone, how do we get him to do that?
And then they just start saying what the AI was doing, like, oh,
that's a great idea. You're really.
Smart, let's say, dude, one of the best things I love asking
it, especially like when I'm creating content or something
like that, or an idea based off of somebody's got this concept
or app or device or service and they're going, you know, what
(13:33):
can we do? And I, I take a lot of that time
that I spent in understanding consumer psychology and writing
and, and even topography and going where, what feeling am I
trying to convey to somebody? Because the way I'm talking now,
the way you're talking now, has not been provided by ChatGPT at
all, right? But this isn't scripted.
(13:55):
But damn it. But The thing is, is that a lot
of our lives are scripted because their interactions on
social media are optimized through AI are.
Algorithms everything like. 100%the algorithms I mean, that's
why you. See is because it's
intentionally fed to you becauseof a designed algorithm.
That's like, OK. And people believe that, well,
(14:16):
I'm on chat, it's just me and chat.
No, it's not. It is the new search engine.
So because that is like #1 search that comes up.
That's what people are striving for.
So unique content based solely on your, where your location is
and the type of customer you're trying to get to and how you
(14:38):
educate them, right. When you educate them, then now
all of a sudden they're like, Ohyeah, yeah, that makes sense.
Hence I do that. And so you're you're you're
striking dopamine with them. But the problem that I see that
with us being so into this is that we believe narratives that
are completely created instead of just based off what you're
(15:01):
seeing and experiencing. Right there comes division.
Because it is all manufactured. I'm Coke and your Pepsi.
Fuck you. Wait a minute, is this is sugar
water that bubbles? Yep.
But no, fuck that guy. Well, is that all you got?
(15:21):
Fucking heathens I'm out of. Here I was, who was I talking
to? I was talking to someone about
that lately. And I'm like, you know, I don't
know if it's Trump or who, what happened the last 8 to 10 years
of existence. It feels like there's been a lot
more hate that's been perpetuated, a lot more
extremism. What?
(15:42):
Do you mean by hate? Hate us and them like Oh no I
don't like extreme stuff of hatred towards the other sides
of like any difference you're different than me versus like
you just said, it's the same thing of like Pepsi and Coke.
Well, they're both just sugary water filled with shit.
(16:05):
No, totally. That's you and me.
We're both the same chemical breakdown.
We're both, you know, flabby flesh things filled with bones
and blood. Like we're the same thing.
We're just different. And it's looking at that going
like it's so weird how much there's this, this, it's just
competition. This oh, it's but that's life,
(16:26):
though. It is.
But it's weird and like I feel like there's been more of that
in the last eight years there where there's been more hatred
towards. And maybe I just was younger
that I wasn't so into the political climate or what was
going on around the globe, 'cause I know there's always
been hatred, but it feels like it's been just pushed to a
(16:48):
different level in some instances that I've been
disappointed to see. But at the same time, from me
and from people I know, I've also seen greater depths of love
that have been expressed becauseit's usually the yin to the
Yang. There is one, but there's also
another give. Me an example of of love, of new
(17:11):
love that you've seen. I mean, in the last eight years,
my, let's see, I probably left religion 13 years ago.
So in that 13 years though, I'vefound a lot more closeness, a
lot more acceptance of people, the ability to see the human,
not the flaws or shortcomings orhowever I was raised to see, you
(17:36):
know, some human versus seeing them and accepting and loving
them for the complete person they are the whole package of
this person. I love you despite this.
No, I I love you. I know.
What you're talking about? In spite of all of these things
like this doesn't change it. I love you because of all of
this. This is who create like what
makes this whole person is everybit of it.
(17:59):
And if if you're hiding like I'mworried I can't show this to you
because you won't love me. All right, I can't show this to
you because you won't love me. Well, you're not loving you and
you're not allowing me to love you because you're worried that
I'm going to judge the real version of you and go, man, that
real version of you, I'm better than that or you're that's not
(18:20):
worthy of love because we're always ashamed or fearful maybe
of like if I show this part of myself to these people, But a
lot of it I think is from childhood because it's, hey, I
showed up this way and I was picked on or teased or bullied
or whatever. And so instead of being loved
even from our parents on those deepest levels, you know, we
(18:40):
show up. And it's how many people have
fear of I can't show this to my friends, my partner, my kids,
my, my siblings, whatever it is,because I I'm fearful that that
version of me won't be loved. Well, that's your truest version
of you. And you're just being afraid of
that. But if you truly let that show,
(19:03):
they will learn to love you. If they truly love you, they'll
go. Yeah, no, I, I love that too.
Like, yeah, it might not be my favorite thing about you, but I
love you. Yeah, Like it.
We don't have to like everythingthat every single person does.
I can, I can, I totally get that, you know, and that's, you
know, both of us have have changed dramatically within the
(19:24):
last, I would say five years of us starting this podcast.
You know, our ideals and beliefshave completely changed.
And and that's the evolution of us, almost anybody who's going
to look inward, right? And I, and I get what you're
saying, like you can, it's all perspective and, and, but the
thing that I always try to caution on that one for myself
(19:46):
and, and anybody I would talk tois that I think of Rome, give
them the circus and give them bread.
And the reason why I say that isthat when we are allowed to
think that everything is wonderful, then we actually
start to retract in our progression.
Because what what I'm saying about the false self that most
(20:07):
of us live in the digital age isthat a lot of this division and
a lot of this self realization, if we can call it, is
manufactured 100%. Most of us are not awake to who
we are. Most of us don't have any
fucking clue what that means or even understand it.
(20:28):
We try to drown it with identitygoing oh, this is who I am.
It's the. Ego coming and going.
This is who I am, yes. This is how I'm divided from
you. Yeah, and yet the ego actually
has nothing to do with that. And it's no realizing that
going. All right.
When I take that out, who am I? What are my habits?
(20:49):
What are my patterns? What are my thoughts?
Like what is this collection that equals?
And then it becomes fictitious. It becomes this fictitious world
because that's the whole thing. Like, you know, before he'd like
human men will do something thatis just absolutely ridiculous,
right. This is what we used to think.
Human men would do anything, payanything to make their Dick
(21:09):
bigger, right. Yeah, legit.
Yep. But it's kind of a joke.
Like there was like one or two dudes like you would hear.
I like I was fascinated. I found it long ass time ago
where they they literally like skin your Dick like a banana and
then they put these weights. Oh, inside.
On top of it and they're pullingand it's supposedly supposed to
(21:32):
like lengthen it but like 1/4 ofan inch.
Just get better. Learn how to use your tongue.
Like. If you're trying to get 1/4
inch. But if you asked every woman,
yeah, there's going to be certain select women going.
No thanks. I've had Vienna's.
I'm not a fan. Right.
I'm a Cabasa girl. Like, cool, whatever.
(21:53):
Everybody's got a different flavor.
Whatever. That's cool.
Yeah. You know, it should be upset or
ashamed either way. Like if you don't like Coke then
don't drink it. Yeah, someone out there likes
coke. 100% micro Dick or not. Right, but that's not the
craziest fucking thing I've everseen.
The craziest fucking thing I've ever seen with this idea that
(22:15):
you need to become something that people really don't care
about. But the illusion online is
taller men are more sought after.
So you got mother fuckers that are drilling screws into their
shin and then they crank it every day.
Yeah, and they will make them. The dudes that are like 5-9 get
(22:37):
to 6 feet tall, but they walk around like I got a stick shoved
up their ass because you have altered the bones and now who
knows if they're going to break.Yeah, they've got medical prop.
Dude, you can't walk right for ayear.
You think of the structural change in damage that you've
done to that, which is not intended to do that.
(23:01):
No, you stop growing at a certain age because your genetic
code says BCS the limit. I think it.
Has in now in the like there's so much dating online and the
problem with dating online. You call it that.
Yeah, it's not even that. It's it's circus.
It's a circus. It's.
Ridiculous. And I think about it and like,
(23:24):
we would have days just hanging out as guys.
Like when Casey and Matt and Chad and I, we were all
roommates and we were just sitting there and it was like,
oh, what do you do? We're going to do a Tinder bomb.
Oh, no, like, all right, well, we better do some shots.
So take some shots and then go and Tinder.
You just push right a million times.
And it was like, Oh my God, Oh, no.
(23:45):
But like. So fucking pathetic.
But it's like, yeah, it's a terrible.
Yeah, it's just a waste of. Time it is.
I would rather play video games.I'd rather.
Go out, do something, engage with people.
I'd rather yeah, I'd rather playMonopoly.
It's the weirdest, like shopping, window shopping for
people. That's what it is and it sucks
(24:06):
window shopping because when youI don't go to the I don't like
going to the mall. I don't even like going to the
mall, even if like one of those things like we wanted to go guy
on the street, ask people. Questions.
Yeah, yeah. You know, which we still should
do. We just need to pick a really
fucking busy day and then go andlet's get baked and go ask
questions with with selfie sticks.
Yeah, and then release forms. But sorry, I got pulled off
(24:30):
track, Jesse. Yeah, we mixed hooch into this.
Oh, that's what's changed. OK, yeah, 'cause I'm like, kind
of giggly now. Oh, that's funny, 'cause I was
like, oh wow, this is a different experience.
It is a different experience. It's a pleasant segue.
It's like right into the head and it's forcing my eyes to
slant. It's like I'm wearing like a
(24:51):
taping. Yeah, it's like this.
Like I'm like this right now, dude.
It really feels like that. Well, my eyes are slanted
anyway, so it doesn't matter, right?
Yes. But the dating thing, dude, like
I used to think, like dating forme was old fashioned.
Like you met each other, you courted, you know, maybe there
(25:11):
was a. Met through a friend of a friend
or something. Yeah, yeah.
You met at work. At some, yes.
Right. I mean, there's all these
different weird ways you met each other at a party, but now,
like it's the most. But we are in a loneliness
epidemic right now. This is the stupid fucking
thing. OK, You can have a tick tock
videos of women going. We're all the good men.
(25:32):
And then they've got another opposite video.
As soon as you flick up, it's going to be a dude going.
I just want a woman to care about.
I I mean, guys have totally reverted to beta ISM meaning
that they can't even have a fucking spine or they can't
enjoy things that they enjoy. They had to change themselves in
order for them to finally get acceptance.
(25:54):
Like I've heard so many oh man, my wife, my girlfriend,
whatever. My boyfriend wouldn't accept if
I used weed. Yeah, I think it's there's a lot
of people that are. But that's your.
Choice fear of like their partner isn't going to accept,
but that was that was why I was so upfront with it with Emily,
(26:15):
because I'm like, I use this medicinally.
This is so much part of my life.I use this daily, multiple times
a day. And you have to understand that
this for me has impacted my lifeso greatly in the positive.
I don't think I will ever go away from that.
And so if you're going to be here, you have to understand
that that's going to be part of my life.
(26:37):
And that's just something you'regoing to have to be OK with if
you want to be part of my life. And it was just because my
ex-wife, at the end when we werebroken up and I was using it, it
was this whole different feelingof like, yeah, I'm feeling like
I'm having to kind of hide this.Yes, she knows I consume and it
helps, but I'm having to be, youknow, not the full version.
(26:58):
I'm not showing who I really am.Yeah, I'm having to hide this to
feel like I could be deserving of love.
Well, but I, you know, on that same thing, like I've become
more of a moral person than I ever have before.
And, and a lot of it I contribute to the deeper moments
like strains like this that we're smoking on hooch.
(27:22):
I I feel that I can be more introspective and less
egotistical as hallucinogens cando as a mild hallucinogen.
Cannabis is great for that. When you find those strains that
really can get you to that state, I tend to really push the
limits with it because I want topush myself.
(27:44):
I know that there is a like a shedding of skin in, in a matter
of speaking, right? When I'm able to shed my skin of
my ego, cause the ego is layers.It's not just something you
crack and you get out of. Because we're all egotistical in
one way or another, right? Whether you know, you know, we
could say like, like I was talking about the difference
(28:06):
between men and women on TikTok saying we're all the good men.
And then we got men over here going.
I would do anything to have a woman and but the belief on this
guy is like I'm not 6 feet tall,I don't have a six figure income
and and I don't have AI. Don't have the same value.
And then the woman's over here going, I don't give a shit about
any of that, but they're thinking like, well, I've slept
(28:28):
with a couple of dudes. You know what?
I'm I'm not a traditional woman,You know, I don't.
I don't. Both sides feel worthless in the
other's eyes. Right and.
Where's my value? Instead of going like hey we
could figure this out because a relationship is a growth
everyday like it it it there is no set it and forget it.
(28:49):
Yeah. Even the most submissive woman
or the most compassionate man, there's something there that
they're hiding from one another.Not a kink like kink comes from
openness. I think it's a fear of like the
eye of acceptance. I'm afraid to show you this fear
of. Loss.
I don't want to get broken up with and because I love what
(29:09):
we've built. And if I share this part, like
what if you don't like it and that's the straw that breaks a
camel's back? Yep.
Fear of loss, fear of control, both of them at the exact same
time. You are feeling it and you and
you're so afraid. And, and one of the things that
I've enjoyed about cannabis is that it's actually allowed me to
show more of me that's always wanted to be there.
(29:30):
I, I am, I am a, I'm a very spiritual man now than I ever
have been before. And everything has attributed to
it. My time with the LDS church even
up to now is still there. And I'm, I'm OK with what it is.
(29:50):
It's it's because I'm not tryingto create division in myself.
Yeah, right. And and I would be hypocritical
in that sense because I accept all people.
I really do. And I will help anybody add to
my ability. I don't care who you are, what
your religious or or political belief has nothing to do with
(30:12):
our interaction right now. And that's the sad part.
Is that because of this menu? I was just like getting a frog
in my throat. All this manufactured division,
like I have division in my family because they believe
something of me and I just don'tdeal with bullshit anymore.
(30:34):
If you're not OK with me in one way or another because you
believe who I am, OK. I don't need to go out of my way
to hurt myself to manufacture. You're upset with me with.
I don't understand, but I allow myself to feel it.
You know what I mean? Like I don't, I don't get upset
(30:56):
anymore. Like I told you about my
siblings. I'm like, I don't know you
fuckers. Like I really don't know you.
Like I got one sister who is fucking unfortunate lifelong
drug addict. Yeah.
Right for over 30 years. That's hard.
It's. Fucking hard.
And I'll tell you, you know, it's like, OK, whatever, that's
just who she is. If she needs me, I'm there.
(31:18):
But other than that, I would do that for anybody.
Yeah, you're giving her the samelove and respect that you would
any human, but you're not opening your home and your heart
deeper because you know what comes back to it.
Yep, and it's you invite them. Setting boundaries for
protection, honestly. And that's healthy.
And that's why I say even with like going to societal, you
(31:38):
know, regardless of whatever perceived value it is like I was
thinking about it on the way over here.
What is our lives driven by in our world, the whole world?
We're not just talking United States, we're talking the entire
world. The only reason we are driven is
to consume 100%. I don't I don't see like if
(32:02):
there was a really cool and it'sa cool idea And and I'll tell
you why. Do you remember those
billboards? Heaven or hell Yeah.
Do you know who who ran those? The Mennonites.
Interesting. And Mennonites are like the
Amish and they would buy those billboards and you would call
(32:23):
that number like my friend, his name is Lee.
He worked for Yes Co and that was his.
Client. Yeah, yeah.
And he said they always paid in cash and they always paid on
time. He's like, and I'm like, what
did they get it for? And he goes, why I wanted it.
So I called him one time and this guy Jebediah.
Of course of. Course.
(32:43):
Is there any of you that are notnamed Jebediah?
Just curious. Yeah, if you're listening to
this podcast. That's what you think?
Not well integrated into the community society culture.
So any help would be appreciated.
So Jebediah. So he called and Jebediah was
there and he was just the guy who talked to you and he goes,
(33:03):
what's on your mind, brother? And he's like, he's like, we had
this like 35 minute conversationabout me, huh?
And he just wanted to talk to meabout me.
And he goes, well, hey, you know, I wish the Lord to be able
to go with you throughout your day and your whole existence and
May God go with you. That's it.
(33:24):
Like that's it. They paid 5 grand per billboard
and they got a lot of them. We have to have someone sit and
just talk with you. All day, 24 hours a day.
I like that they take. Shifts to just talk to you and
it it goes back to the teachingsof Christ, right?
To those who are in prison, you visit them.
It doesn't always mean the physical prison, it also means
(33:46):
the internal prison. Prison too.
We're to visit. So we met a new friend.
That friend had a kid who's struggling, who's on suicide
watch. And I know that resonates with a
couple of you guys as well, and we're glad you're still here.
But when he was talking about that, even in that time, I was
(34:07):
talking to him about like, hang on, that's probably Emily or the
neighbor bringing it. That's fine, it's the neighbor.
Yeah, OK. But he was talking about the OR
I was talking to him about healing hikes and about
psilocybin, just micro dosing and walking in nature And that
feeling of feeling like a kid again.
(34:28):
Because going up on this hike where we got maybe a mile up
everything was so inspiring. The Moss, the rocks, the way the
water moved the trees, you know,the movement of the trees.
Every little thing was just so in capturing that we would just
(34:50):
we didn't make it hardly very far up the Canyon, but it took
us 3 hours to do. And is kid who's really
struggling. And when I say kid, he's like
23. He's a kid.
He's still a kid. He's struggling with wanting to
be here, finding a purpose, feeling like he has a reason to
exist reality. And and I just I offered like it
(35:13):
was a Hey, would you take my kid?
Like, I would love to take your kid on a hike and and do this
healing hike and just talk with him because yeah.
And it's that thing of like, youknow, the same thing as these
billboards of just connecting with people to connect to go,
hey. What a cool.
Thing you have purpose you have like you matter.
(35:35):
There is a reason and it and it's hard because not everyone
connects the same. No, it's this disconnected world
and you go like, how many times do you go to a group thing or
church or anywhere? How many people are just
disconnected on their phones, just staring at their screen,
surrounded by actual people theycould connect with.
(35:55):
And instead of any of us connecting, it's we're just
staring at our emotional support.
What tingles? It's, well, it's manufactured
dopamine. I mean, the, the, the whole
purpose of it at first was utility.
Like you think about it, the phones before, like the most
advanced phone you had was the BlackBerry.
Yeah. Right.
I mean, you could get your e-mail on there like mother, but
(36:19):
what? Like my sidekick?
I could get the Internet. No, I could get pictures.
I could get Google. I could do Internet on my old
Nokia brick phone. It was really shitty and it took
forever and it was like, yeah, but dude, you.
Had the Internet? Oh.
My gosh. Yeah.
Like we. Were so impressed.
Yeah, and now I'm like this emotional sport rectangle.
(36:43):
And that's what I realized because a lot of it, I go to
places and I'm like, I really love the real connection, the
hanging out. And I feel so much more full
when it's a real connection because otherwise it does feel
like business meetings. Hey, how's your week been?
What's the weather like? How are you kids?
Yeah. What's your husband like?
(37:04):
You're working on any projects? OK.
What movies have you watched did?
You go to church this week, Do. You play games, we check all
the. Boxes.
OK. All right.
Well, we'll see you in a couple more weeks.
Yeah, I'll see you in a fucking year.
They get, it's a weird disconnect and you don't feel
rejuvenated or full. And like sometimes life's heavy
(37:25):
and we have friends that we're there for because we love them
and that's why we're there and their life can be heavy, but
like not everyone's is. And it's, it's nice to have that
real connection because like a real hug, a real like
conversation sitting across fromsomeone, like really looking in
and connecting with them. It's different.
(37:47):
It's not the same. It's you can send a, have a
million Facebook friends or Instagram followers or whatever.
Yeah. But at the end of the day, like,
what does that equate to as far as like mental being, mental
Wellness? Dude, let's just call it what it
is. It's just masturbation and
digital form. I mean, all you're doing is
jerking yourself off. Oh, I got more followers.
(38:08):
Like, if you've got a business attached to it, I understand
that. I totally understand that.
But if you're just some random pimply face kid who's having a
real hard time connecting with the world and you start
pretending to be something that you're not?
Or if that's how you find connection, because right now
that is truly all you find connection in because you are
very disconnected, Maybe that's a good place to start.
(38:31):
And that's where that's one of the things that I like about
cannabis too, is that it puts you in a place of discomfort at
first. Like when you have a lot, it
puts you in a place of discomfort and you got to
fucking figure your shit out because it's not going away.
You didn't learn that. Yet do you think it's the lack
of control? It it is.
You have time. Doesn't feel real time, feels
like. It's gone, yeah.
(38:51):
Really weird concept and structure and.
Because we're in a different type of reality.
Song was 3 hours long. No, it was like 3 minutes, but
it just felt like 3 hours, you know, or like distances.
And you're like, man, my arms feel like they're crazy short or
really long. They're like whatever it is that
you're like, I don't feel normal.
I don't feel in control. This doesn't feel like reality.
(39:13):
And you're having to sit back and go, no, I'm OK, this is OK.
I'm just, this is not normal. I'm not used to this and I have
to go. Am I actually OK or am I just
feeling weird because this isn'tnormal for me and honestly the
first several times it was, it was not normal.
But it was a, you know, but the,the thing that I enjoy, I, I
(39:37):
loved, you know, at the time when cannabis came into my life,
I was still doing mixed martial arts and then I was still
teaching and all that stuff. And one of the things that I, I
loved about it was that it actually took away control.
And I, I couldn't it back then, I couldn't describe what my
(39:57):
first experiences, my true experiences with cannabis, not
just smoking it randomly at a party or something like that,
like really just in it. And when I got those first vape
pens from you, like dude, it felt like getting choked out
because for me, getting choked out first, it's fucking
(40:19):
frightening. But when you let go.
You know it either way, you're going to wake up, you're going
to wake up. So don't don't worry like if get
out if you can, but if you can't, there's no shame in
tapping and or just waking up. Like don't have to freak out
(40:40):
when you wake up going fuck got caught, didn't I?
Because that was an awesome feeling for me when you would
catch somebody in a choke, whichis like a real dangerous thing.
But to me it was it was very philosophical too, because when
you're choking somebody, you youhold life in your hands.
(41:02):
Yeah, literally. And you can choose to take it or
just pause it. And when you pause it, you, you
understand the feeling that you're transmit even in that.
And, and, and if you're, if you're a, the reason why people
kill each other that way is because they've never trained
(41:22):
it. And when you don't train it,
such as training your mind to beable to slowly adapt to
cannabis, because if you just goall in, then you can develop a
super high tolerance. Well, or just really bad panicky
states at the beginning versus if you were to able to have a
really nice smooth introduction into it, you could get to those
(41:45):
points where you're having higher doses later, but it
doesn't have to be right at first.
You could just have a smooth ride the whole way.
Absolutely. Like they're yes, people talk
about, hey, you have to ride it out or you have to do this.
Why? You don't have to have a bad
experience. Like it's like going, hey,
you're riding down this hill on this bike.
Your bike has brakes, but you don't have to use them because
(42:08):
this is a rite of passage to just have to ride down and slam
into the wall at the end. Well, and and that's.
How? Just take the brakes the whole
way down. And and that's the other thing,
like kind of taking it back to, you know, the, the origin of our
conversation, right? This manufactured division that
we have created for ourselves because before there were no
(42:29):
real, like, growing up in the 90s, we'll just take gay, gay
kids, Right. I knew gay kids in high school.
But even though some were complete assholes and they were
just Dicks to them because you're different, everybody else
just knew they were different. But they didn't bring it up.
Yeah. You were friends with them
(42:50):
regardless. Yeah, it was.
Same in the Navy. There was some gay guys in my
boot camp division. Totally right.
No one was hiding it there. Very prissy.
Yeah. But yet they didn't get beat up
like in the movies. Oh no, they they were just like,
fuck, I guess that guy's. Gay.
I went to LDS based private school and there were two dudes
(43:11):
there that presented as gay and it wasn't still super big at the
time. They didn't come out and go I'm
gay but they were flamboyant as fuck.
Like you could tell. Yeah, but that's OK because they
were just different. Like I knew, OK, yeah, they're
probably gay. They're not trying to put it in
my butt. They're not trying to climb on
top of me, pin me down and make out with me.
(43:32):
They're not making me feel uncomfortable at all.
Why the hell would I care? No.
And that's the thing like there is there's no reason to care and
and because the reason why is there was no manufactured reason
to care. Did you you, you grew up here
and you said you experienced a lot of racism?
Yes, I grew up. I was white, but I had Hispanic,
(43:53):
Native American. Oh, it's where I live.
Black kids, I had everyone as friends because to me they were
just people. Well, you can understand too,
like where I was at. Like I had to think back to it
because you had a very differentexperience because of where you
were at. It was in this hyper religious
bubble area within Utah County. Provo even more so.
(44:15):
Right. Like everybody thought Salt Lake
was it like. But I even Provo I never even
thought about it. No, because that's just the way
you were. In Grandview, I never thought
about it being the rich neighborhood either because to.
Me. No, it's just where you grew up.
Grandview. It wasn't nice or fancy.
It wasn't the east side of town where the big nice homes by the
temple were. It was Grandview.
(44:35):
Yeah, did that was rich that's. Rich.
Exactly. So then when that's where we
like, we moved from here to the East side, and then it was like,
oh, OK, well, now I don't. Everyone called me rich on
Grandview. Yeah, but I've never felt rich.
We felt poor. Dude, when I had a house in
Grandview, yeah, like I talked to friends like back in high
school or something at the time,and they're like, where do you
live in? So I live in Grandview Hill.
(44:56):
And they go, oh. Yeah, and I'm like.
What are you talking about? It's a fucking hill.
That's it, that's it. It's not like it goes into Orem,
like it's not that big of a deal.
It was orchards and small stuff.There was like a tiny little
area where there were like a fewkind of rich homes.
Mm Hmm. Great couple.
Yeah, just a few. Yeah, some average and then some
(45:18):
above average. But a lot of is is small amount.
But at the same time, so Emily was just, we were watching my
family videos and that growing up and there's the video of us
building the very first home that we built and I'm like 2.
And Emily was like, you have A2 car garage.
And I was like, yeah, every homein the neighborhood had a 2 car
(45:42):
garage at least some even had a three car garage.
Like it wasn't as often, but. Yeah, those are few.
Every home had one. And I was like, I just, I didn't
know any about it different. It was just the world I grew up
in. And that home was the smallest
home I had lived in growing up. And yet that was still larger
(46:03):
than a lot of the other homes that people grew up in.
And I didn't know it because to me it was just a home.
Nothing else was fancy or extravagant.
I didn't live in a lavish life. So I just, I don't know, it's
this weird difference of certainperspectives and then seeing
someone else and them going, oh,you lived here, you did this.
(46:24):
Well, yeah, because people were considered part of a class.
Yeah, right. I mean, we haven't escaped
classism. People.
We, we class each other. Like there was a place in Orem
they called Pork Chop Hill. Why?
Because that's where all the cops lived, huh?
They literally moved around eachother because they weren't
accepted in community sometimes.Wow.
So they all live by. I had a friend, King Kawi.
(46:45):
He's old Hawaiian dude. And he, he worked for me when I
worked at the state hospital forso long.
And I was his direct supervisor.And he's like, yeah, I grew up.
I came out there from Honolulu. And, you know, we has a cop in
in Orem. And I mean, he talked about like
it was crazy. It was just crazy.
But you know. I love that big Hawaiian Samoan
(47:07):
community. Dude like the coolest Tim.
They were at Tim View, I was friends with them, I was
randomly friends with all sorts of groups, but not enough that I
hung out with them regularly. I just was like.
You just hang out with random people.
Yeah, and I'd be at any of them.And there was this kid who was
just a Dick and he decided to whitewash me my freshman year.
(47:30):
What? Yeah, no reason why.
Just being an asshole. That's not cool.
And because he was bigger than me, I was this tiny little kid.
So this moans grabbed him because they saw him and they
were friends with me. They grabbed him, multiple of
them, and they whitewashed the shit out of him.
And I was like, all right, Well,it just, that's such good
(47:50):
people. You know, it's so funny that
it's like this. Really awesome.
I mean, this never ruined my relationship with Polynesian
people, but my youngest, why? I got into martial arts first
grade and this Polynesian kid just bullied the shit out of me
and every Reese's, he would grabme by my jacket and throw me and
(48:13):
then he would push me aside because I like this one girl and
she would talk to me and he liked her.
So he's just like chunk No, like, right.
And that's how he just fucked meup.
And my dad was so mad because hegrew up very machismo in, in, in
Mexico. So everybody fought at the time
in Mexico City. Like it's any different now, but
(48:37):
it's just different. My dad grew up in a very
different time. Like Mexico today doesn't look
like anything he grew up with. Oh no, like only imagine.
Not like people who grew up in New York City.
It's still New York City. Oh yeah.
Not like dirt streets and yeah, no.
Cobbles. Tiny shanties and stuff, Yeah,
yeah. Like they, they didn't have like
a working shower. They just poured water out each
(48:57):
other. Like I, I kind of wish that I
lived like that because the luxuries of life kind of make us
soft, right? But moments, yeah.
Yeah, I don't know why. That was like a Bear Bear Grylls
moment there, right? Yeah.
The only way you can survive is getting the water out of camel
dung. Right, just set up a shower
Outback. Yeah, you know, it's right by
(49:17):
the road and everyone gets a show coming into the community,
haha. I knew it was small.
Like jokes on you, it's always small.
It's been fun. But you know, I, I, the thing
I'm, I, I think about right now,and I was thinking about it on
the way over here, is that if wecan let go of that weird
(49:38):
stranglehold that we believe that other people perceive us in
some way. Like the honest reason, like why
I love cannabis so much is that I'm just an easygoing guy and I
love to learn about people so much that I became in a way,
like a a minor expert in behavioral science because I
just, it's not that I go ha ha. I know how you feel.
(49:59):
It's like, OK, cool. Now I can understand how you
feel. And now I can get my ego out of
the way and now I can try to make sure that we have a
connection here because I enjoy being around other people.
And I'm aware that you may not like or even appreciate the same
things that I do. And that's OK.
(50:20):
That's OK That I don't like the same things that you do, but I
can appreciate what you like. Yeah.
Or that you find enjoyment and stuff from that.
Yeah. That's that's why I've loved 12
shapes. That's why I've, I've really got
in paralinguistics and kind of created a quasi one of my own.
That's a simpler 1. But I'm just like, you know, I
just want to understand and lovepeople for who they are because
(50:43):
I've become more aware. I was more I, I, I was more
selfish before because I was consumed at the belief of what I
needed to be so much that I cared so much about what I
wanted to be that I gave up a ton.
I gave up so much time. And it's not that I'm like, oh
(51:04):
crap, I can't get this back. Fuck it, they're gone.
I don't care. I can't cry about that last
breath I took. It was just the last breath I
took. It didn't mean it was the end.
It was just that's gone. So now I can learn from it.
It just makes future ones more precious or going oh.
I savor the moments. More.
(51:25):
Yes, exactly. It's kind of like when we were
teenagers, you didn't give a shit what the food tastes like,
you were just excited to eat it.Yeah.
And then now you appreciate the food.
Well, it's even I've been thinking about it too, every
time I drive around. Like I went down Texas this last
month and as flat as fuck, there's no mountains.
(51:45):
I miss the mountains. I am always in awe even as I
drive around every day and I'm admiring the mountains.
I'm like, man, these are beautiful.
I just, I love how they're shaped like the, just the
details, the the nature, everything around it and just
always awe inspired being surrounded by mountains.
(52:07):
And it's just when I was young, I never really cared or noticed
or like it was like, oh, they'rejust here.
It's what I know. And as I got older and used
cannabis, it was like, man, these are incredible.
Yeah, isn't that funny? The plant draws you to the
plants because when you're when you when you're in survival, do
you even care about what? And he thinks.
(52:30):
Because guess what the other person's thinking, Oh my God,
I'm just trying to survive. And then when you see other
people, it's not like kill them,they're trying to survive, you
know, right, Because that's, that's the way that we have been
manufactured to hate each other,right?
And it's, it's just manufacturedlike when you understand, like
this is one thing that I've, I've realized becoming very in
(52:51):
touch with, with what I considerGod, you know, whatever you
consider, that's fine. I, I, I accept all of that.
But for me and, and what I believe and what helps drive me
is, is that connection and it's letting go of what I need more
of what can I do to serve? And serving doesn't mean like,
(53:11):
oh wait, hand and foot on you. It's more on the side of how can
I, how can I use whatever I havebeen given, whatever I know
Yeah, to help you in any way, shape or form.
It's not me being a would be considered a.
No, it's, it's giving the skillsand the expertise that you have.
(53:32):
Yeah, it's needed. Like my dad called me up going,
hey, grandma has shocks again. OK.
I made her a tincture, gave her a specific dosing and that and
took it down to her. And now she's probably doing.
Great and yeah and her shocks have been way reduced.
She can last for like 5 hours off of 1/2 a tincture dropper.
And yeah. And I'm like so stupid simple
(53:52):
things like that or someone elsewas like, hey, my dad has cancer
and he's got back pain and he doesn't want to use this and I
made him a pain cream, sent thatout again.
Like there's these really simplethings that we can do to just
serve other people that it's. And and it doesn't need to
necessarily be attached to how much is it going to cost me
time, money again, Go smoke someweed and help yourself out
(54:14):
because I don't care. I don't care.
And I've let go of that idea. Like, you know, we had some shit
come up it just recently. And a gift of mine was some
money from my mother, right? Yeah.
And I was very grateful for it. My dad got me socks and a pair
of shoes. I was super grateful for a pop.
It was awesome for work and I had to use the money to get some
(54:38):
like gas and food and my wife's like, oh, don't use that.
I'm like, it's just money. I don't care about.
It doesn't bother me. It's not like, Oh well, it's for
me to do this. I mean, the only thing I asked
for was the newest version of the of the Bible, not the King
James Bible Bible, right? And so.
A newer translation, yeah, it's.Pretty cool all the Dead Sea
(55:00):
Scroll stuff in it, It's very awesome.
Does it have the apocrypha in there or the Dead Sea Scrolls do
not include all the apocrypha? I think this one does include
the apocrypha. I think it's after the New
Testament. It's typically where it falls in
line. OK, so it'll be the Old
Testament, New Testament, and then the Apocrypha.
And there's some of them that aren't in there.
There's so many, right? Like the book of Thomas, they're
(55:21):
like, oh, but it's basically just a collections of sayings
that Jesus said. So it's not necessarily
something that is new and it waswritten well after.
So it's just, it's just more. Interesting to have.
It's just, and that's why like, you know, Enoch doesn't
necessarily go with the canonized scripture because it
doesn't fall in line with that one, but it's still considered a
(55:43):
part of it. And that's what the Apocrypha
is. So it just means different.
That's what all it means. The different books.
Yeah, the different books. Right.
So funny. Like it does like like like a.
Fuck, we got the books and the different books.
Yeah, as I'm like, oh, these arethe evil books like whatever.
But it's this idea that, man, when we are more in touch with
(56:05):
our more primal selves and and meaning that we've let go of the
shedding of materialism. And I know it sounds so Foo Foo,
but the idea is, is that I care more about that.
I'm not saying like you can't get nice things, just saying
like you can get nice things. But if they break or get stolen
or they disappear or they burn with the house, they're just
(56:26):
things. Yeah, they they don't hold
importance. A thing can always be replaced.
100% that's why the relationships are so important
and and why, you know, 12 shapeswas such a huge thing for me is
that I find this amazing system that helps me to understand
other people in a little bit on the behavior side.
And what I can do at first is not going well, let me tell you
(56:48):
about your childhood, you know, like no, it's on the side of
going, Oh, I understand that maybe being around a lot of
people right now is not comfortable for you.
You know what I'm going to offeryou a respite.
Hey, you want to go outside? They're like, yes.
Yeah, cuz you don't see it too sometimes you like.
Oh yeah. But you can.
And when you can hear and tonality and stuff like that,
(57:09):
those are the things, the reasons why I've learned those
things and, and try to adapt into everyday life is that I
just want to understand other people so I can help them feel a
little bit more comfortable. Because for me, my need is
connection. Yeah, it's a selfish need.
I think everyone, like every human, has that need.
We just sometimes different wavelengths, Yes.
And we don't realize it as well sometimes because maybe we don't
(57:33):
always have that need met. Maybe smoke a little weed, think
about what you need. Yeah.
And, you know, some real connection.
And you know, you might have a test coming up.
It's true. And even though Schedule 3
started the process doesn't meanit's legal, people.
It's not. You might still need to pass a
test now and then. Yeah, and you need to be smart.
(57:54):
You need to get 100. You do.
In the temperature needs to be close to 100.
Yeah, maybe like 9898.6 roughly.We got a perfect study buddy
that'll help you hit that perfect temperature and that
perfect score every time. Yeah, Synthetics 5 has produced
some of the best synthetic urineout there to help you pass
tests. Yep, we don't know why, but
(58:15):
there's a code below that'll save you a little bit.
So absolutely. So save yourself 50,060 thousand
85,000. Yeah, however much it is that
you might make in a year. And check the show notes below
for all the other links, just count on stores and pickle our
favorite bomb ear rigs or DoctorTAVR products.
(58:37):
But love you guys. Take care.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com