July 21, 2025 • 34 mins
Being fine is a blessing… and a curse. On this week’s episode of Chocolate Chip & Sip, I’m joined by the gorgeous Dajhavuu as we break down what it’s really like dating when everyone expects you to settle down already. From missing the wrong man, to choosing softness with the right one, we’re telling the truth about standing on business—even when your body wants to stand on him. Tap in for a juicy one.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:05):
What's up, beautiful people, It's your girls Story. Repeat and
we're back with another episode of Chocolate, Chip and Sip.
And today we are gonna be talking about the soft
girl lifestyle, the not so soft breakups, and why sometimes
you need a little bit of break in between, you know,
maybe even a little beverage. All right, this conversation was
so good I couldn't do it myself, so I had
to bring a fellow beatty to come talk to me.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
Today.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
I got my girl days Chavu and Ima. Let her
introduce herself. Go ahead, get give it to me, Give
it to me.
Speaker 3 (00:32):
My name is Dad Janvou.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
I'm a hip hop artist from Methey, Tennessee. I saw
a songwriter, a natural lover of life and creative all around.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
You feel me, daddy today and.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
Today they forgot to tell y'all, if y'all listening on audio,
that she's so beautiful and she smelled like natural juices
and berries. And when she came in, I said, oh,
my goodness, who is I could.
Speaker 3 (00:59):
Yes, yes, good.
Speaker 1 (01:03):
So I saw one of your clips and you was
talking about how we always talk about, you know, standing
on business and you know, self care and all other stuff.
But will we ever see a web again. And that's
when I said she's the one girl.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Be it just you being a flow of self love
and getting yourself right and then ovulation here and you'll
be like, who's.
Speaker 3 (01:29):
Gonna get me right? Though? Like damn, you know what
I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
People always in the comments like girl investing a massage, gun,
investing a toy, But a toy is not gonna hold
it back of your neck, looking to your ass, call
you beautiful and push it in slow.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
Like I don't need a toy. I need a bicep
to lay on.
Speaker 3 (01:46):
That's what. That's what. I need a leg Like, yes,
I put my to in. That's so much, that's too much.
You have found the right place, little do you know?
You you have genuinely found.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
The right place you found yeah yeah, kind of tying
into that, I think that another one of my frustrations
is like I hate when I'm done dealing with talking
to dating a man. But nobody told fat Ma that
we're done dealing with dating talk.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
To a man. And I think that's another part of like,
you know, just being by.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Yourself, like that whole two three week period after you
stop dealing with somebody it's hard.
Speaker 3 (02:33):
Yeah, it can be. It can be.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
I mean, this is gonna sound out extra like serious
and ship, but sometimes come on different levels. Somebody could
really be in your body, but really be fucking your mind,
your soul, and it be the energy of that that's
still existing, your body calling for his match one of
that person. So it's like ship. You gotta be careful, Yes,
(02:57):
once the talk through it.
Speaker 1 (02:58):
Yes, because hold my therapist telling me to let go,
but my body is saying let him have his way.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
And I don't know which one I need to be
paying attention to.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
I feel that don't don't, don't, don't be serious.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
That's why you gotta be careful, because lord, you can
get addict this at the wrong Yes.
Speaker 3 (03:17):
Yes, man, but we we be good to yes for you.
Speaker 1 (03:21):
And now it's two am and you sending texts or
if you like me, you just type the text and
then delete the text, and then twenty minutes later you
come back and try to do it again, and then
you do it again, you do it again.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
It's it's a little bit of insanity.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
I'm I'm, I can recognize it's a little bit of insanity, okay,
g And.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
I make comments that I don't post like, yeah, I'll
go to a nigga at g and just be like
you should and then I just delete that word. But
actually it's so many dudes that I got Christians on
they have no idea.
Speaker 3 (03:52):
Can we talk about the adult crush?
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Because I feel like having a crush as an adult
is way more severe and emotional than it was back when.
Speaker 3 (04:00):
We was kitched.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
Absolutely absolutely, Because you grown, I could literally get in
my car and pull up to your residence.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
You know what I'm saying. Ain't nobody Mama gonna say
shit to me. I could really pull up and pull
down on your ass.
Speaker 1 (04:12):
But you know, and I think it's different when you
like cupkicking on the phone, swinging your legs, cheesing all
herd because like, every once in a while you catch
yourself like, what the fuck am I doing?
Speaker 2 (04:21):
Grow walking around the kitchen, putting the milk in different.
Speaker 3 (04:26):
Places, Yes, but don't know why. Yes, all types of shit.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
You walking around with the phone and the spikes rack
because you're still trying to FaceTime while you like it's
a thing.
Speaker 3 (04:36):
I used to love that feeling.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
I feel like as an adult, though, like the next
one that I really want to like you. I want
that same feeling, Like I really want to be sitting
in the kitchen like running my fingers under the water
for no reason and don't know why I'm doing that.
Speaker 3 (04:51):
Shit. Yeah you know what I'm saying in the bathroom,
rearrange your towels, doing shit. I ain't got nothing to
do on the phone, all giddy and shit. Listen, it's
it's aimless. Shit. We always talk about like how the
dating pool has pissing it and how it's trash.
Speaker 1 (05:07):
But when you find the right one and like you're
dating one attention and you find somebody who like vibing
with you, it's low key lit like bacon cookies at
two am, Like.
Speaker 3 (05:19):
Yeah, like you're putting out energy that you're receiving back.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
Like people talk about how IG set up a standard
that's like not realistic. And then at the same time
I be seeing a lot of good looking looking okay,
good looking, equally yoked looking type of relationships and marriages,
and that make you think, like shit, it's still possible
out there.
Speaker 3 (05:41):
It's not. It's not something that's too far fish to
fall in love.
Speaker 1 (05:44):
And I think the only people who really experienced this
whole IG ain't a real place. Are the people who
think that IG is a real place. Like for people
who understand that social media's entertainment, it's not that bad.
It's really not like it's just adult hood. Honestly, you
gotta have disinment with anything.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
It's like you might as well pregk to sit on
the daily with the scroll. I don't know, it's killing us.
Speaker 1 (06:08):
The doom scroll. The doom scroll catch you in a minute,
it will during this moment. Have taken a pause from dating.
I found that I've encountered a lot of people who
give me the vibes or the energy of we'll just
pick one already, Like.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
One is like pickle, dude, they want me to just
pick one.
Speaker 1 (06:24):
Like you're being so so picky, and I just feel
like you're you just expect the perfect man to come
into your life. It's like, this is a funny way
to say, I got standards and boundaries.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
You were for being mad at me for having standards.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
That's crazy, God forbid. I want to wait for what
I want. Who do I think I am?
Speaker 3 (06:42):
Oh my god, you're not. I think that's weird.
Speaker 2 (06:45):
I think the joy of life and being young and
being tender and being fine and being tight and right
is being able to date and see the variety that
you have and as you change, see the changes in
the people that you would tract.
Speaker 3 (06:57):
Because that's what I'm noticing too.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
The more I pour into myself and learn about myself
and grow and settle into my own divine feminine, the
more wide range, versatile, expressive, spiritual, like just different types
of Yeah that I'm starting to a track and I
have that it ain't no more.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
Why ends now?
Speaker 2 (07:13):
M m begeting into some grown men's now really liking
that and yeah, yeah the growth, the growth should match
that shit, you know you should. A lot of people
settle at levels that they were supposed to keep going
from us, and that be an issue.
Speaker 3 (07:29):
Yeah, trapped, don't don't five for.
Speaker 1 (07:31):
That, And I feel like that's why they don't understand
five six years in they're not happy, but technically their
partners and doing anything wrong, right, but they're not.
Speaker 3 (07:39):
Happy because they settled. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's messed up.
Speaker 2 (07:43):
We can we gotta be best friends, Like if I
can't kick it with you with nothing sexual involved and
like you or we can't be together, yeah, no matter
how good the sexual energy is if I can be
your friend on a regular day, I can't fuck with
you for the.
Speaker 1 (08:00):
Sn So how do you cut somebody off that is
not doing anything wrong? You just don't want to be
their friends? Like y'all don't vibe like that. You back
that ass up.
Speaker 3 (08:12):
Up slowly?
Speaker 2 (08:12):
Yea, no more fun, let's take Okay, I'm gonna reply, okay,
no more be in the store?
Speaker 3 (08:19):
Back that ass? Okay? Are you just slowly backed the
ass up? Wow?
Speaker 1 (08:22):
So you don't like intentionally be like, hey, you know what,
it's not doing it for me?
Speaker 2 (08:26):
See unless I say that he's actively pursuing. If it's
just who just like wasting time?
Speaker 3 (08:32):
Low key?
Speaker 2 (08:32):
Yeah? You know what I'm saying, talking just to have
an option to talk to because it's normally when I
get in positions, it's like I'm noticing something about how
you treating me or how you're dealing with me. That's real, optional,
real replaceable. So it ain't nothing official to be like, yeah,
I think that.
Speaker 3 (08:49):
You ain't even there yet. Yeah, so I'm gonna just
back that ass.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
So you're gonna like break from it reverse like you
just slowly gonna let it go.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
And if you notice it and you got something to
say about we can have a conversation, but as far
as what I've already perceived about this, I'm replaceable to you.
Speaker 3 (09:09):
I'm just getting you know what I'm saying. Now, what
if he full court pressure? You're like, yo, I'm noticing,
then I'm a full court give him then answer I
didne did that.
Speaker 2 (09:19):
It's crazy sometimes they avoided because I remember in the
DM this one guy he was talking about like, yeah,
you've been playing games for so long it's been and
I was like, what actually to break it down for
you the first time when we first I just broke
the whole ship and everything that I didn't like. Why
I stopped sucking with him like that, the whole ship and
I'm mona fucker read it and just didn't say shit
else because like soe now I got an attitude that
(09:43):
I don't I something and never looked back.
Speaker 3 (09:47):
I used good thumb power sending this text because you
asked for it. That should be a lot. That's why
you just backed that ass back. That just back that
ass up. You really try to tell him a buck
what they did?
Speaker 2 (10:00):
They not riddle to take accountability anyway, So you're wasting
your time just back to the ass up, make room
for the next motherfucker who ready for them games.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
You might be on a someng with that one. The
accountability is something that I feel like everybody struggles with
right now, So yeah, I ain't mad at it.
Speaker 3 (10:17):
It's a growth process. Not everybody read it for this.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
It's a multitude of things because sometimes you attract men
who want to be with you, sometimes you attract men
who want to be you, and sometimes you are attract
men who want the attention that they get when they're
with you. So it's hard sometimes trying to figure out
what people's intentions are and try and not automatically to
(10:41):
judge them, like, oh, I just feel like.
Speaker 3 (10:42):
You're gonna be in some fuck shit exactly.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
So understanding that about the individual can help you have
grace not to crash out because it's like it ain't
even worth it when you really can find like, oh
you just feel insecure alone, or oh you you don't
like the fact that people notice you won't when I'm around,
unless when I'm not. I'm not even gonna waste my
time crashing now, because it's low key what you want
(11:07):
to give you some type of gratification, So that's how
I find a grace for myself. It's finally like, what's
really the motherfucker's issue?
Speaker 3 (11:14):
But I ain't gonna lie lucky.
Speaker 2 (11:15):
I've been kind of scared to like date because I'm
so focused on my music and focused on my growth.
Speaker 3 (11:21):
I'm still trying to figure out in my.
Speaker 2 (11:23):
Mind how to exist as two different people at the
long time.
Speaker 3 (11:26):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
Yeah, I'm just fully locked in Daja food Daddy. I'm
on the shit, Like you know, I don't know how
to like, Okay.
Speaker 3 (11:33):
Now I'm your girlfriend.
Speaker 2 (11:36):
Yeah, I got because I instantly after about like a
day or two be like, I'm throwing my life away?
Speaker 3 (11:44):
What am I doing? It's just it's hard.
Speaker 2 (11:48):
So one day it's gonna make sense. But right now
I don't even don't I don't know.
Speaker 3 (11:54):
Do you have a desire to want somebody or get
a person? Absolutely? Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 2 (11:59):
I feel like everything I'm doing right now is to
become the best version of myself.
Speaker 3 (12:03):
To be that.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
Yeah, when it has it all like has the relationship,
has the career, has the love life, has the growth
in finance, like just the whole aspect of it, I
just feel like point into myself right now is the
most vital thing I can do, because who I want
and what I want they doing that. Yeah, so I
need to mirror that before I even meet you, because
(12:27):
how else will I meet you?
Speaker 1 (12:28):
I thought that I felt that, like I felt like
I wasn't meeting my person because I wasn't the person
that my person would be interested in at that time, exactly.
Speaker 3 (12:37):
Exactly, Like that's accountability.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
Yeah, yeah, Like I wasn't really like heavy heavy in
the gym, and I'm like, yeah, but I want me
a buff nigga?
Speaker 3 (12:44):
How where you want me to mark? He gonna find you? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (12:48):
Social media be trying to make it seem like, you know,
outside is like just so much fun and all girls
just want to be this, And it's like, contrary to
popular belief, I actually do want to bark like I
want it, Like I want to find somebody who makes
me feel safe enough to like pour into them the
way I want them to pour it into me.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
Yeah, that's the big thing, the safety of doing it,
because it's like when you do be on that outside
tip and the telling females we're going outside, we're doing
certain shit and this is no shade to the women
who be outside because I know to be outside. But
when you got a certain level of standards, this shit
is not fun.
Speaker 3 (13:24):
Yes, spending out that time.
Speaker 2 (13:26):
Being in this motherfucker face, that person doing drinks, doing
this is going here, going there all to just all
that energy.
Speaker 3 (13:32):
You take it home and go to sleep with it.
But you know, I think it is.
Speaker 1 (13:35):
I think a lot of people never had a person
that brought them peace, and that's why they be putting
so much negativity on. It's nothing good out there and
there's nothing like it. Like it's like, no, you just
ain't never had it. You just ain't never had it,
well speaking, I never had it. We're gonna get into
a segment of the show here it's called up somebody
come look at this?
Speaker 3 (13:56):
Uh?
Speaker 1 (13:57):
And this is where I read hilarious stories.
Speaker 3 (14:01):
That I have found on Reddit.
Speaker 1 (14:03):
Okay, and I think that this ties in a lot
to what we were talking about today. Want in love,
but having boundaries and you know, sticking up for yourself.
Speaker 3 (14:13):
You no, I want to leave in things like that? Right?
Speaker 1 (14:16):
So the first one, am I the asshole for dumping
my date? I had a first date scheduled with a
woman I met on a dating site. We agreed to
meet for coffee at two pm. You down for a
coffee date for a first date? Me too, that's my ship.
Speaker 3 (14:32):
I met it. Or ice cream. I'm really big on
ice cream. I like it. Or juice bar for realness.
Oh you like Sai bowls? Girl? I am a realion.
I say creamy, light, skamble, not no show. You know
what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
But like you're not at said sometimes be laughing, doering.
It's going to be there both to be damn near black.
Speaker 3 (14:55):
No, no, no, we're good.
Speaker 1 (14:56):
I arrived on time. At two ten, she texts me
and asked if I was at the cafe. I said yes,
and she said she was at home but would leave
soon and would be there in twenty minutes.
Speaker 3 (15:07):
We were supposed to meet at two o'clock.
Speaker 1 (15:09):
Why are you texting me at two ten saying you're
still home but you won't meet here in twenty minutes.
Speaker 3 (15:13):
That's disrespectful, that's respectful.
Speaker 1 (15:17):
Basically, her text implied she was waiting to make sure
I was there before she bothered to leave home.
Speaker 3 (15:23):
That's disrespectful.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
I was put off. I took the risk she wouldn't
show and came on time. She should have too.
Speaker 3 (15:31):
Am I wrong?
Speaker 1 (15:32):
I finished the coffee and left at two thirty. She
still wasn't there. At two forty five, I got a
text from her wanting to know where I was.
Speaker 3 (15:40):
How that's crazy. I'm not gonna lie. That's the whole story.
Speaker 1 (15:45):
No, I said, I finished my coffee and left at
two thirty, when you still weren't there as promised. She
sent a series of nasty texts telling me how awful
I was and how I did everything wrong.
Speaker 3 (15:57):
I should have texted her and told her I was
leading at my asshole.
Speaker 1 (16:02):
Do women really expect men to sit and wait forty
five minutes for them to arrive late when the only
reason they are late is to make you wait? It
sure seemed like it was a game or shit test
either way, she felt my test.
Speaker 2 (16:14):
I'd sure like to hear from women on this one.
That's a woman with no accountability. Like it's just you're
gonna be dealing with somebody who gonna always want you
to give one hundred and ten percent and they give
maybe forty maybe feed these type shit, and if you
want that then that's cool, But as somebody who do
not respect you all, And.
Speaker 3 (16:36):
I don't care if it was the first date. If
you're just not a good person.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
That's you saw you had a time, that's all you
have to say, Hey, real mass before we link up.
I'm not a good person, very that's all you gotta
say once you go into the frame. Or like taking
somebody else's time for granted, you don't care about their
life because you don't know what if he had.
Speaker 2 (16:53):
A disappointment, anything he could be with you know what
he count there, anything like that. But you think your
time is so gracious, you are so much that they
can wait on you. It's not anybody I want to
be even friends with.
Speaker 3 (17:06):
I'm not gonna hold you.
Speaker 1 (17:07):
I don't like late people, and I don't mean like
every once in a while you're late. Like I feel
like we all have that one person in our lives
who's consistently late, like we know they gonna be late.
Speaker 3 (17:15):
To their own funeral.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
Everybody has somebody like that in their lives, right, And
it's like, you don't know what I be rearranging in
my life to get to a place on time. So
it really be pissing me off sometimes I hate it.
Speaker 3 (17:30):
So was he the asshole?
Speaker 1 (17:31):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (17:32):
Or no?
Speaker 2 (17:32):
No?
Speaker 3 (17:32):
He want no asshole? But I felt like he wasn't
an asshole too. Hell no, he went no asshole.
Speaker 2 (17:37):
I wouldn't even tell the man I was still at
the house soon as I'm like you, dad like yeah, okay,
I'm down the street. I'm walking and be just grabbing
my eyes. But to still not be there twenty minutes,
light up there you a food.
Speaker 1 (17:48):
You don't like him to say, I like you to say,
or you just trying to wait to see if the
other guy was gonna text you back first. Just say that,
Just say that, Just say that. This one piss me off.
It says be an asshole. If I tell my boyfriend
how disappointed I am in the date he took me on,
I feel like we always.
Speaker 3 (18:07):
Talk about women be so mean.
Speaker 1 (18:08):
But just hear the story first. That's all I'm gonna say.
Listen to the story first. For background, my boyfriend doesn't
make a lot of money. This is the first problem,
but I digress. We're gonna keep going. I don't mind
this at all, but it also means we don't go
out much because he doesn't like me paying for him.
This is the second problem, because now you're you're you're making.
Speaker 2 (18:29):
This so we can't go out so the car I
ain't got no dose the cain got no seat bill,
but were driving okay okay.
Speaker 1 (18:36):
When he told me he wanted to take me to
a nice dinner on him, I was pleasantly surprised. Turns
out his mom had given him a fifty dollars voucher
for a nice restaurant nearby, and he said he saved
up a bit of money to cover the rest jesu,
(18:56):
but you better have enough to cover that even like,
even without the coupone is is it over?
Speaker 3 (19:03):
No?
Speaker 1 (19:06):
He had been to this restaurant before and had always
raved about the beef Wellington.
Speaker 3 (19:10):
I was excited.
Speaker 1 (19:12):
We got there and sat down and he ordered a beer,
so I follow suit and got the same.
Speaker 3 (19:17):
He made a comment about just one and then waters
after this, okay, oh car.
Speaker 1 (19:24):
We started looking at the menu and again he was
raving about the beef Wellington. I said it sounded amazing
and I think I'll try that. Then he says, okay, great,
so I'll order that. Now let's maybe look at some
of the pastas huh. I was confused for a minute.
Then he pointed out a penne a la vodka, the
(19:44):
cheapest item on the menu, and mentioned how good that looked.
I agreed, but said, what happened to one in the
beef Wellington. He said, yeah, I'm gonna order that, and
I was thinking the penne for you.
Speaker 3 (19:57):
Then we can try both. Yeah, the tie just pop
or we not done yet? And we not done. We're
still rolling, y'all, we're still rolling. Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (20:10):
I caught on at this point that the budget went
and cover us both getting a pricey meal, so I
agreed to order the pasta. I was a bit annoyed,
but whatever. I also noticed at this point that there's
a plate splitting fee on the menu. To be honest,
I don't really know what that is exactly. By assume
it means there's a fee if you want to split
the meals between you. We put our food orders in
(20:35):
and our drinks are empty at this point, so I
asked for water like he indicated, because remember he said,
after this, we just getting water. He then orders another
beer from himself. Now I'm a bit more annoyed.
Speaker 3 (20:54):
He wants you to die.
Speaker 1 (21:01):
I did consider telling him I would pay for my
portion just so I could order things I actually wanted,
but I didn't want to imply that he wasn't spending
enough money on me, and he was so excited about
taking me out and paying for it himself. Says, from
the bottom of my heart, No he wasn't. No, he wasn't. No,
he wasn't.
Speaker 3 (21:18):
No, he wasn't.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
You. Anyway, our food comes and he's in heaven I met.
The pasta was actually amazing as well. I had a
bite of his, but declined when he offered to put
half of it on my plate out of fear of
the previously mentioned plate spitting faith. He ordered another two
beers for himself. Throughout the dinner, I didn't end up
finishing my meal because honestly, I was just uncomfortable most
(21:44):
of the time. Then at the end they came with
the bill and a box for my leftovers, and he
takes the box of leftover pasta and says, I can't
wait for my mom to try this. She's going to
be so happy that there's some left for her. I
(22:08):
thanked him for the meal, but I think he could
tell my mood was off. I know he was trying
to do something nice, but honestly, the whole thing just
felt a bit disrespectful.
Speaker 3 (22:17):
Would I be the asshole if I bring it up
to him. It was the I can't wait for my
mom to try this for me.
Speaker 2 (22:22):
You feel me, That's how I'm feeling like you Been
know you had to know he was like that.
Speaker 3 (22:27):
He couldn't have just popped up like that.
Speaker 2 (22:29):
You've been accepting mediocre everything you had to be unless it's.
Speaker 3 (22:34):
The wee wee. If she Been knew he was not shit.
Speaker 1 (22:39):
You at least knew he was like well, I won't
say cheap, but you knew he already was frugal.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
Yeah, you knew he was broke.
Speaker 1 (22:45):
It is what it is, but it's a difference. It's
a difference between broke. Considerate.
Speaker 3 (22:52):
You're gonna take my left obles, nigga.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
After you done talk me up about this beef Wellington
for weeks and I couldn't even get nothing but a
bite nick well then technically hold on weight. Here's another.
Here's another, here's another standpoint. Let's not forget the mom
did give him the fifty dollars about.
Speaker 3 (23:09):
Your I don't care, so maybe she was expecting to
bring you something back. Then take your mammy out. Don't
do me like that. That's fair? Like what that's fair?
Why y'all don't have a mic. They're not gonna be
able to hear you.
Speaker 2 (23:23):
Guys not as crazy. Oh my gosh, she would have
been what would you do?
Speaker 3 (23:32):
I have bet that is up. Okay, how do you
make your ass up? You already have to you already
at the table. What do you do now?
Speaker 2 (23:41):
Get a bat of there, take myself to go eat something.
I really won't post it on my story, and sit
there by myself like first date, kind of nervous.
Speaker 3 (23:49):
It's her boyfriend.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
I do feel like when she was like, oh well,
I didn't want to, you know, disrespect him because he
was so excited about paying, and I would have been
excited about eating it and drinking. So we both gotta
be excited. One of us can't be excited, but one
of us not. So I don't sound like a bitch.
Speaker 3 (24:05):
Okay. The thing is, you got to feel a fifty
dollar gift card from your mom. Cool. That's great. You
said you got enough to pay for the resk. Cool.
Speaker 2 (24:13):
I know you lacking resources anyway. Cool, I'm thankful. Cool,
But now you're taking advantage of the fact that I'm
accepting this type of behavior and you showing your.
Speaker 3 (24:22):
Drunk as natural born ass like now, it's a problem now.
Speaker 2 (24:27):
I know you don't really value me. You wanted to
do this for you. It wasn't an us thing. You're
not excited to pay for it for me. You just
would have felt guilty if you came and did this
shit by yourself.
Speaker 3 (24:36):
That's what you're giving, Yes, especially because you be broke. Yes,
that's what you're giving.
Speaker 2 (24:40):
What you should have did is on your work break,
take that fifty dollars gift card.
Speaker 3 (24:45):
Eat that shit by yourself. Bring me the leftovers. Ma
oh shit, Okay, cool, you want out with y'all?
Speaker 2 (24:50):
Okay, cool, and figure something else out or be cheaper
and shit, go to the grocery store and we could
cook at the crib or something.
Speaker 3 (24:57):
Take it out under the start, do something either doing that.
Speaker 1 (25:01):
Unacceptable, Do any of those things, or do what moms
do every day.
Speaker 3 (25:06):
Eat your food in the car before you come in
the house.
Speaker 1 (25:08):
Get your food eating in a car before you come
in the house, like every other mother.
Speaker 3 (25:12):
Okay, that's what you need to do.
Speaker 2 (25:15):
Even if you went there ordered to beef Wellington out
the size and shit like that and brought it home and.
Speaker 3 (25:19):
We split it. I'm cool with this. Yes, it's so.
Speaker 2 (25:24):
Many ways around being broke to still be happy. But
that was Selfish's hell, hate me? You hate mee beer?
Speaker 3 (25:34):
No water? You hate me? You gonna drink the beer
in front of me, knowing I want to live up.
You hate me? You know they called me stone cold.
I need more than one beer. You know that you
hate you? Run all right? So one more?
Speaker 1 (25:51):
Am I the asshole for eating before my date arrived
to the restaurant?
Speaker 3 (25:55):
How was he late?
Speaker 1 (25:56):
So for contexts, I am not a foodie. I eat
to get full and not as an experience. I'll often
eat at home before dinning outing before dinner outings just
because I don't want to wait and rather enjoy the
experience of the outing, which for me doesn't involve the
eating portion. I met the score online and we agreed
on meeting at a restaurant for dinner to get to
(26:18):
know each other more. Fast forward day of our date.
We agreed to meeting at nine pm. Now, my day
was super busy with work and I just didn't get
to eat lunch. It's almost eight pm and I'm starving,
so I get ready and head to the date still
having no food. I like getting to a date early
so I can check out the environment, pick the best seats,
and just prepare in general. So I have arrived about
(26:40):
forty five minutes early this time.
Speaker 3 (26:42):
I think that's strange. Forty five minutes early, and what
are you doing? Case and the joint? Why the fuck
are you there so early?
Speaker 1 (26:49):
You plan an access though, you gotta that's creepy, creepy,
that's creepy.
Speaker 3 (26:55):
What about that's creepy? Forty five minutes early?
Speaker 2 (26:58):
I'm saying out it's it's a way. What if he
had to put his name on the list? He that's
provision of.
Speaker 3 (27:05):
Forty five minutes is a little excessive.
Speaker 1 (27:07):
If VX me still starving, I decided I should eat
to get that out of the way, or I'll be
hungry and cranky having to wait another hour or so
before I could eat. I finished my meal and ordered
a cocktail. By this point, my date is almost arriving.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
Okay, okay, that's creepy.
Speaker 1 (27:28):
She gets to the restaurant and we instantly click. She's smiling,
We're having a great conversation, she's touching my hand. It's
overall going extremely well. Eventually she asks if I would
like to order some food, to which I respond, no,
thank you. I'm not hungry, and she insists, saying she
doesn't want to eat alone. But I tell her don't
(27:49):
worry and eat and that I'm enjoying my cocktail. Now
here's my problem. I do not like eating by myself, period.
I never like eating myself. That's like one of my
pet peeves, like I need here, have a little bit
of something, get some fries or something. I just don't
like eating by myself, Like I don't know what it is.
So I get her when she saying she don't like
to eat alone, I get.
Speaker 2 (28:12):
So.
Speaker 1 (28:12):
We called the waiter over it, and she starts asking
him for recommendations, to which she responds with no ill
intentions that it seemed I really enjoyed the tacos, so
maybe she should try them. I'm gonna tell you why.
I don't give a fuck, and I feel like that
waiter said the right thing. Right, You've been holding up
this fucking table for two hours.
Speaker 3 (28:34):
And you only has.
Speaker 1 (28:35):
No I'm gonna say, as a former server, you're holding
up the line and stopping my bag like she's not
eating you already ate you're holding up my table.
Speaker 3 (28:46):
Somebody else would come in and be ordering fucking shots.
Get here, I don't. I'm glad the waiter play I hated.
I'm gonna enjoy shit.
Speaker 1 (28:56):
At this point, she's confused and acts, what does that mean?
So I told her I ate some tacos before she arrived.
She immediately becomes furious, saying I'm rude and who eats
before a date has even arrived. I explained to her
that my goal was to get to know her and
the eating portion wasn't important, regardless the.
Speaker 3 (29:18):
Whole mood change. She ordered some food, ate and made
an excuse to have to go and leave.
Speaker 1 (29:24):
I haven't heard from her since then, and that was
last night, so a my asshole, lucky.
Speaker 3 (29:31):
Getting there early ain't an issue? You good? Getting there
early ain't an issue eating.
Speaker 2 (29:36):
A full meal and having a cocktail before I even
put my ass on this, Like, see, that's a problem.
Speaker 3 (29:41):
A meal? You couldn't get some fries?
Speaker 2 (29:43):
She should have just invited me to coffee. Bruh, we're
like what, I wouldn't.
Speaker 3 (29:47):
Be mad at you on your second line save by
the time I get there something like that. But a meal,
we're supposed to be eating and joining each other.
Speaker 2 (29:53):
Man, I feed you a list something you feed me
like you know It's an intimacy that could be there
that you just.
Speaker 3 (29:59):
You.
Speaker 1 (30:01):
I couldn't get no spinach dip, okay, no my currella sticks?
Speaker 3 (30:07):
You got full tacos, some kind of flower nothing.
Speaker 1 (30:10):
You called yourself being considerate, but not consider enough to
wait for her to eat.
Speaker 2 (30:15):
Yeah, maybe a couple of tea chips or some shit
with some sauce on it, you know what I mean,
little something I was starting. Baby, I'm sorry, I had
me a little tea chair.
Speaker 3 (30:24):
But let's order, you know, boneless, what something?
Speaker 2 (30:27):
I'm good, I'm enjoying my cocktail. You didn't even say no,
I already ate. I'm so sorry.
Speaker 1 (30:31):
Nothing And why why the waiter had to tell me?
Why you ain't tell me?
Speaker 2 (30:35):
Why you ain't Why she gotta put you on front street?
Yeah she did right by eating doing her thing.
Speaker 3 (30:42):
Actually, I got it, man, I gotta go, gotta go.
Speaker 2 (30:45):
They seem like somebody that will, like try to have
good intentions about doing something for you, but because they
do that, they'll then also be selfish in that space
because they feel like they extended.
Speaker 3 (30:55):
Themselves so much.
Speaker 1 (30:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (30:56):
Yeah, that's a weird type of space to be in.
So I take it back. You might be you're weirdo, y'all.
I'm about forty five minutes earlier.
Speaker 3 (31:03):
That might be forty five minutes early. It is crazy.
That's ward enough time to get my sorella sticks. Twenty minutes.
Speaker 1 (31:09):
Twenty minutes is spare because I feel like most of
the time you go to a restaurant, if it's like
during happy hour or something like that, they'll tell you
it's like a twenty minute week.
Speaker 3 (31:16):
Twenty minutes is spare. That's considerate.
Speaker 2 (31:18):
Yeah, because I'm just thinking, like, maybe you're doing this,
so the better time I get in there, I could
just walk straight to it's able to sit down, do
my whole thing.
Speaker 3 (31:24):
You know.
Speaker 2 (31:25):
I thought that was very intentional, very sweet, but eating
a whole meal prior too.
Speaker 3 (31:30):
You hate me like you hate me. I'm back to this.
Speaker 1 (31:33):
So if this is your brother, it comes to you
and tell this story, what advice would you give him?
Speaker 3 (31:39):
Nigga? You a food? Are you like? Okay? Who raised you?
Who raised you? That's what I would say, What the
fuck raise? You didn't get that from outside of the family.
Do you like her?
Speaker 2 (31:47):
I clearly don't like her. You hate her? Leave her alone.
You're gonna cause no problems.
Speaker 3 (31:52):
Don't do that. Leave he alone.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
Yeah, you know, I felt like this conversation wouldn't be
complete without really honing in on you and the dopest
things you have going on and coming out.
Speaker 3 (32:08):
So can you talk to us a little bit about
your project?
Speaker 1 (32:10):
So?
Speaker 2 (32:10):
I just released the song. It's called work to Do.
It's on our platforms. It's the women empowerment song about
all the work that we put in on it every
single day just to be our great, beautiful selves. I
got a project coming out later this year, but while
we wait for that, it's other songs that's out.
Speaker 3 (32:27):
Bag Lady, as you start a bag that myself. I
love it me real craft. That's so cute. It's cute. Yes,
bring you one, please do that. It's so cute. I
didn't know you made that. That's fire. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:39):
I got a self love anthem called I Choose Me,
So remake an international players anthem because you know, is
now okay?
Speaker 3 (32:46):
Then? And who got it together? Come on somebody? Yeah? Yeah,
what we got accountability? Send me?
Speaker 2 (32:53):
So we're gonna we're gonna marinate. Don't know until the
project coming out later. There's plenty of music, plenty of
good vibes, plenty of good energy that you could tap
into from deja vu on our platforms.
Speaker 3 (33:02):
Okay, enjoy the ride, Gonna great? I love that. Tell
people where they can find you.
Speaker 2 (33:08):
You can find me on Instagram, YouTube, all platforms, and music, Apple, Spotify,
title wherever. Just type in deja vu d a jha
v u. My tag handle is d a jha v
you U. I'm still working on trying to get my
regular name from somebody.
Speaker 3 (33:24):
Oh girl, let me tell you something. I can't posted
twenty thirteen. Get my name.
Speaker 1 (33:30):
I went on TikTok the other day to start a
personal TikTok page and somebody had my name and they
didn't just have my name, they used all my pictures
from Instagram. And then I told TikTok take it down.
And I can't even select myself as they're impersonating me.
Speaker 3 (33:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:46):
Yeah, I just had to report a couple of pages
on TikTok for doing the same thing. And it might
be some creepy asx.
Speaker 3 (33:52):
Oh the dok told you? Oh hell no me? Oh shit,
Well listen, wen, we're gonna figure it out. Yeah, but
step in with deja Vue d a j h j
a v u on aur.
Speaker 2 (34:04):
Platforms my music, my visuals, everything's coming out and it's
a beautiful ride of just shit, self expansion, self growth,
self realization, and.
Speaker 1 (34:14):
I want you to come with me. So yeah, hell yeah,
hell yeah. I mean my message is always gonna be
the same. Follow me on the Gram, ask for me,
p P E A at chocolate Chip and sip And
if you don't remember anything else, please remember.
Speaker 3 (34:26):
In the words of dja Vu, you hate me. I
love you, guys, and I'll see you next week.
What's up, beautiful people, It's your girls Story. Repeat and
we're back with another episode of Chocolate, Chip and Sip.
And today we are gonna be talking about the soft
girl lifestyle, the not so soft breakups, and why sometimes
you need a little bit of break in between, you know,
maybe even a little beverage. All right, this conversation was
so good I couldn't do it myself, so I had
to bring a fellow beatty to come talk to me.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
Today.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
I got my girl days Chavu and Ima. Let her
introduce herself. Go ahead, get give it to me, Give
it to me.
Speaker 3 (00:32):
My name is Dad Janvou.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
I'm a hip hop artist from Methey, Tennessee. I saw
a songwriter, a natural lover of life and creative all around.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
You feel me, daddy today and.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
Today they forgot to tell y'all, if y'all listening on audio,
that she's so beautiful and she smelled like natural juices
and berries. And when she came in, I said, oh,
my goodness, who is I could.
Speaker 3 (00:59):
Yes, yes, good.
Speaker 1 (01:03):
So I saw one of your clips and you was
talking about how we always talk about, you know, standing
on business and you know, self care and all other stuff.
But will we ever see a web again. And that's
when I said she's the one girl.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Be it just you being a flow of self love
and getting yourself right and then ovulation here and you'll
be like, who's.
Speaker 3 (01:29):
Gonna get me right? Though? Like damn, you know what
I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
People always in the comments like girl investing a massage, gun,
investing a toy, But a toy is not gonna hold
it back of your neck, looking to your ass, call
you beautiful and push it in slow.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
Like I don't need a toy. I need a bicep
to lay on.
Speaker 3 (01:46):
That's what. That's what. I need a leg Like, yes,
I put my to in. That's so much, that's too much.
You have found the right place, little do you know?
You you have genuinely found.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
The right place you found yeah yeah, kind of tying
into that, I think that another one of my frustrations
is like I hate when I'm done dealing with talking
to dating a man. But nobody told fat Ma that
we're done dealing with dating talk.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
To a man. And I think that's another part of like,
you know, just being by.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Yourself, like that whole two three week period after you
stop dealing with somebody it's hard.
Speaker 3 (02:33):
Yeah, it can be. It can be.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
I mean, this is gonna sound out extra like serious
and ship, but sometimes come on different levels. Somebody could
really be in your body, but really be fucking your mind,
your soul, and it be the energy of that that's
still existing, your body calling for his match one of
that person. So it's like ship. You gotta be careful, Yes,
(02:57):
once the talk through it.
Speaker 1 (02:58):
Yes, because hold my therapist telling me to let go,
but my body is saying let him have his way.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
And I don't know which one I need to be
paying attention to.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
I feel that don't don't, don't, don't be serious.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
That's why you gotta be careful, because lord, you can
get addict this at the wrong Yes.
Speaker 3 (03:17):
Yes, man, but we we be good to yes for you.
Speaker 1 (03:21):
And now it's two am and you sending texts or
if you like me, you just type the text and
then delete the text, and then twenty minutes later you
come back and try to do it again, and then
you do it again, you do it again.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
It's it's a little bit of insanity.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
I'm I'm, I can recognize it's a little bit of insanity, okay,
g And.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
I make comments that I don't post like, yeah, I'll
go to a nigga at g and just be like
you should and then I just delete that word. But
actually it's so many dudes that I got Christians on
they have no idea.
Speaker 3 (03:52):
Can we talk about the adult crush?
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Because I feel like having a crush as an adult
is way more severe and emotional than it was back when.
Speaker 3 (04:00):
We was kitched.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
Absolutely absolutely, Because you grown, I could literally get in
my car and pull up to your residence.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
You know what I'm saying. Ain't nobody Mama gonna say
shit to me. I could really pull up and pull
down on your ass.
Speaker 1 (04:12):
But you know, and I think it's different when you
like cupkicking on the phone, swinging your legs, cheesing all
herd because like, every once in a while you catch
yourself like, what the fuck am I doing?
Speaker 2 (04:21):
Grow walking around the kitchen, putting the milk in different.
Speaker 3 (04:26):
Places, Yes, but don't know why. Yes, all types of shit.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
You walking around with the phone and the spikes rack
because you're still trying to FaceTime while you like it's
a thing.
Speaker 3 (04:36):
I used to love that feeling.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
I feel like as an adult, though, like the next
one that I really want to like you. I want
that same feeling, Like I really want to be sitting
in the kitchen like running my fingers under the water
for no reason and don't know why I'm doing that.
Speaker 3 (04:51):
Shit. Yeah you know what I'm saying in the bathroom,
rearrange your towels, doing shit. I ain't got nothing to
do on the phone, all giddy and shit. Listen, it's
it's aimless. Shit. We always talk about like how the
dating pool has pissing it and how it's trash.
Speaker 1 (05:07):
But when you find the right one and like you're
dating one attention and you find somebody who like vibing
with you, it's low key lit like bacon cookies at
two am, Like.
Speaker 3 (05:19):
Yeah, like you're putting out energy that you're receiving back.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
Like people talk about how IG set up a standard
that's like not realistic. And then at the same time
I be seeing a lot of good looking looking okay,
good looking, equally yoked looking type of relationships and marriages,
and that make you think, like shit, it's still possible
out there.
Speaker 3 (05:41):
It's not. It's not something that's too far fish to
fall in love.
Speaker 1 (05:44):
And I think the only people who really experienced this
whole IG ain't a real place. Are the people who
think that IG is a real place. Like for people
who understand that social media's entertainment, it's not that bad.
It's really not like it's just adult hood. Honestly, you
gotta have disinment with anything.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
It's like you might as well pregk to sit on
the daily with the scroll. I don't know, it's killing us.
Speaker 1 (06:08):
The doom scroll. The doom scroll catch you in a minute,
it will during this moment. Have taken a pause from dating.
I found that I've encountered a lot of people who
give me the vibes or the energy of we'll just
pick one already, Like.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
One is like pickle, dude, they want me to just
pick one.
Speaker 1 (06:24):
Like you're being so so picky, and I just feel
like you're you just expect the perfect man to come
into your life. It's like, this is a funny way
to say, I got standards and boundaries.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
You were for being mad at me for having standards.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
That's crazy, God forbid. I want to wait for what
I want. Who do I think I am?
Speaker 3 (06:42):
Oh my god, you're not. I think that's weird.
Speaker 2 (06:45):
I think the joy of life and being young and
being tender and being fine and being tight and right
is being able to date and see the variety that
you have and as you change, see the changes in
the people that you would tract.
Speaker 3 (06:57):
Because that's what I'm noticing too.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
The more I pour into myself and learn about myself
and grow and settle into my own divine feminine, the
more wide range, versatile, expressive, spiritual, like just different types
of Yeah that I'm starting to a track and I
have that it ain't no more.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
Why ends now?
Speaker 2 (07:13):
M m begeting into some grown men's now really liking
that and yeah, yeah the growth, the growth should match
that shit, you know you should. A lot of people
settle at levels that they were supposed to keep going
from us, and that be an issue.
Speaker 3 (07:29):
Yeah, trapped, don't don't five for.
Speaker 1 (07:31):
That, And I feel like that's why they don't understand
five six years in they're not happy, but technically their
partners and doing anything wrong, right, but they're not.
Speaker 3 (07:39):
Happy because they settled. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's messed up.
Speaker 2 (07:43):
We can we gotta be best friends, Like if I
can't kick it with you with nothing sexual involved and
like you or we can't be together, yeah, no matter
how good the sexual energy is if I can be
your friend on a regular day, I can't fuck with
you for the.
Speaker 1 (08:00):
Sn So how do you cut somebody off that is
not doing anything wrong? You just don't want to be
their friends? Like y'all don't vibe like that. You back
that ass up.
Speaker 3 (08:12):
Up slowly?
Speaker 2 (08:12):
Yea, no more fun, let's take Okay, I'm gonna reply, okay,
no more be in the store?
Speaker 3 (08:19):
Back that ass? Okay? Are you just slowly backed the
ass up? Wow?
Speaker 1 (08:22):
So you don't like intentionally be like, hey, you know what,
it's not doing it for me?
Speaker 2 (08:26):
See unless I say that he's actively pursuing. If it's
just who just like wasting time?
Speaker 3 (08:32):
Low key?
Speaker 2 (08:32):
Yeah? You know what I'm saying, talking just to have
an option to talk to because it's normally when I
get in positions, it's like I'm noticing something about how
you treating me or how you're dealing with me. That's real, optional,
real replaceable. So it ain't nothing official to be like, yeah,
I think that.
Speaker 3 (08:49):
You ain't even there yet. Yeah, so I'm gonna just
back that ass.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
So you're gonna like break from it reverse like you
just slowly gonna let it go.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
And if you notice it and you got something to
say about we can have a conversation, but as far
as what I've already perceived about this, I'm replaceable to you.
Speaker 3 (09:09):
I'm just getting you know what I'm saying. Now, what
if he full court pressure? You're like, yo, I'm noticing,
then I'm a full court give him then answer I
didne did that.
Speaker 2 (09:19):
It's crazy sometimes they avoided because I remember in the
DM this one guy he was talking about like, yeah,
you've been playing games for so long it's been and
I was like, what actually to break it down for
you the first time when we first I just broke
the whole ship and everything that I didn't like. Why
I stopped sucking with him like that, the whole ship and
I'm mona fucker read it and just didn't say shit
else because like soe now I got an attitude that
(09:43):
I don't I something and never looked back.
Speaker 3 (09:47):
I used good thumb power sending this text because you
asked for it. That should be a lot. That's why
you just backed that ass back. That just back that
ass up. You really try to tell him a buck
what they did?
Speaker 2 (10:00):
They not riddle to take accountability anyway, So you're wasting
your time just back to the ass up, make room
for the next motherfucker who ready for them games.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
You might be on a someng with that one. The
accountability is something that I feel like everybody struggles with
right now, So yeah, I ain't mad at it.
Speaker 3 (10:17):
It's a growth process. Not everybody read it for this.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
It's a multitude of things because sometimes you attract men
who want to be with you, sometimes you attract men
who want to be you, and sometimes you are attract
men who want the attention that they get when they're
with you. So it's hard sometimes trying to figure out
what people's intentions are and try and not automatically to
(10:41):
judge them, like, oh, I just feel like.
Speaker 3 (10:42):
You're gonna be in some fuck shit exactly.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
So understanding that about the individual can help you have
grace not to crash out because it's like it ain't
even worth it when you really can find like, oh
you just feel insecure alone, or oh you you don't
like the fact that people notice you won't when I'm around,
unless when I'm not. I'm not even gonna waste my
time crashing now, because it's low key what you want
(11:07):
to give you some type of gratification, So that's how
I find a grace for myself. It's finally like, what's
really the motherfucker's issue?
Speaker 3 (11:14):
But I ain't gonna lie lucky.
Speaker 2 (11:15):
I've been kind of scared to like date because I'm
so focused on my music and focused on my growth.
Speaker 3 (11:21):
I'm still trying to figure out in my.
Speaker 2 (11:23):
Mind how to exist as two different people at the
long time.
Speaker 3 (11:26):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
Yeah, I'm just fully locked in Daja food Daddy. I'm
on the shit, Like you know, I don't know how
to like, Okay.
Speaker 3 (11:33):
Now I'm your girlfriend.
Speaker 2 (11:36):
Yeah, I got because I instantly after about like a
day or two be like, I'm throwing my life away?
Speaker 3 (11:44):
What am I doing? It's just it's hard.
Speaker 2 (11:48):
So one day it's gonna make sense. But right now
I don't even don't I don't know.
Speaker 3 (11:54):
Do you have a desire to want somebody or get
a person? Absolutely? Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 2 (11:59):
I feel like everything I'm doing right now is to
become the best version of myself.
Speaker 3 (12:03):
To be that.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
Yeah, when it has it all like has the relationship,
has the career, has the love life, has the growth
in finance, like just the whole aspect of it, I
just feel like point into myself right now is the
most vital thing I can do, because who I want
and what I want they doing that. Yeah, so I
need to mirror that before I even meet you, because
(12:27):
how else will I meet you?
Speaker 1 (12:28):
I thought that I felt that, like I felt like
I wasn't meeting my person because I wasn't the person
that my person would be interested in at that time, exactly.
Speaker 3 (12:37):
Exactly, Like that's accountability.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
Yeah, yeah, Like I wasn't really like heavy heavy in
the gym, and I'm like, yeah, but I want me
a buff nigga?
Speaker 3 (12:44):
How where you want me to mark? He gonna find you? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (12:48):
Social media be trying to make it seem like, you know,
outside is like just so much fun and all girls
just want to be this, And it's like, contrary to
popular belief, I actually do want to bark like I
want it, Like I want to find somebody who makes
me feel safe enough to like pour into them the
way I want them to pour it into me.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
Yeah, that's the big thing, the safety of doing it,
because it's like when you do be on that outside
tip and the telling females we're going outside, we're doing
certain shit and this is no shade to the women
who be outside because I know to be outside. But
when you got a certain level of standards, this shit
is not fun.
Speaker 3 (13:24):
Yes, spending out that time.
Speaker 2 (13:26):
Being in this motherfucker face, that person doing drinks, doing
this is going here, going there all to just all
that energy.
Speaker 3 (13:32):
You take it home and go to sleep with it.
But you know, I think it is.
Speaker 1 (13:35):
I think a lot of people never had a person
that brought them peace, and that's why they be putting
so much negativity on. It's nothing good out there and
there's nothing like it. Like it's like, no, you just
ain't never had it. You just ain't never had it,
well speaking, I never had it. We're gonna get into
a segment of the show here it's called up somebody
come look at this?
Speaker 3 (13:56):
Uh?
Speaker 1 (13:57):
And this is where I read hilarious stories.
Speaker 3 (14:01):
That I have found on Reddit.
Speaker 1 (14:03):
Okay, and I think that this ties in a lot
to what we were talking about today. Want in love,
but having boundaries and you know, sticking up for yourself.
Speaker 3 (14:13):
You no, I want to leave in things like that? Right?
Speaker 1 (14:16):
So the first one, am I the asshole for dumping
my date? I had a first date scheduled with a
woman I met on a dating site. We agreed to
meet for coffee at two pm. You down for a
coffee date for a first date? Me too, that's my ship.
Speaker 3 (14:32):
I met it. Or ice cream. I'm really big on
ice cream. I like it. Or juice bar for realness.
Oh you like Sai bowls? Girl? I am a realion.
I say creamy, light, skamble, not no show. You know
what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
But like you're not at said sometimes be laughing, doering.
It's going to be there both to be damn near black.
Speaker 3 (14:55):
No, no, no, we're good.
Speaker 1 (14:56):
I arrived on time. At two ten, she texts me
and asked if I was at the cafe. I said yes,
and she said she was at home but would leave
soon and would be there in twenty minutes.
Speaker 3 (15:07):
We were supposed to meet at two o'clock.
Speaker 1 (15:09):
Why are you texting me at two ten saying you're
still home but you won't meet here in twenty minutes.
Speaker 3 (15:13):
That's disrespectful, that's respectful.
Speaker 1 (15:17):
Basically, her text implied she was waiting to make sure
I was there before she bothered to leave home.
Speaker 3 (15:23):
That's disrespectful.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
I was put off. I took the risk she wouldn't
show and came on time. She should have too.
Speaker 3 (15:31):
Am I wrong?
Speaker 1 (15:32):
I finished the coffee and left at two thirty. She
still wasn't there. At two forty five, I got a
text from her wanting to know where I was.
Speaker 3 (15:40):
How that's crazy. I'm not gonna lie. That's the whole story.
Speaker 1 (15:45):
No, I said, I finished my coffee and left at
two thirty, when you still weren't there as promised. She
sent a series of nasty texts telling me how awful
I was and how I did everything wrong.
Speaker 3 (15:57):
I should have texted her and told her I was
leading at my asshole.
Speaker 1 (16:02):
Do women really expect men to sit and wait forty
five minutes for them to arrive late when the only
reason they are late is to make you wait? It
sure seemed like it was a game or shit test
either way, she felt my test.
Speaker 2 (16:14):
I'd sure like to hear from women on this one.
That's a woman with no accountability. Like it's just you're
gonna be dealing with somebody who gonna always want you
to give one hundred and ten percent and they give
maybe forty maybe feed these type shit, and if you
want that then that's cool, But as somebody who do
not respect you all, And.
Speaker 3 (16:36):
I don't care if it was the first date. If
you're just not a good person.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
That's you saw you had a time, that's all you
have to say, Hey, real mass before we link up.
I'm not a good person, very that's all you gotta
say once you go into the frame. Or like taking
somebody else's time for granted, you don't care about their
life because you don't know what if he had.
Speaker 2 (16:53):
A disappointment, anything he could be with you know what
he count there, anything like that. But you think your
time is so gracious, you are so much that they
can wait on you. It's not anybody I want to
be even friends with.
Speaker 3 (17:06):
I'm not gonna hold you.
Speaker 1 (17:07):
I don't like late people, and I don't mean like
every once in a while you're late. Like I feel
like we all have that one person in our lives
who's consistently late, like we know they gonna be late.
Speaker 3 (17:15):
To their own funeral.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
Everybody has somebody like that in their lives, right, And
it's like, you don't know what I be rearranging in
my life to get to a place on time. So
it really be pissing me off sometimes I hate it.
Speaker 3 (17:30):
So was he the asshole?
Speaker 1 (17:31):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (17:32):
Or no?
Speaker 2 (17:32):
No?
Speaker 3 (17:32):
He want no asshole? But I felt like he wasn't
an asshole too. Hell no, he went no asshole.
Speaker 2 (17:37):
I wouldn't even tell the man I was still at
the house soon as I'm like you, dad like yeah, okay,
I'm down the street. I'm walking and be just grabbing
my eyes. But to still not be there twenty minutes,
light up there you a food.
Speaker 1 (17:48):
You don't like him to say, I like you to say,
or you just trying to wait to see if the
other guy was gonna text you back first. Just say that,
Just say that, Just say that. This one piss me off.
It says be an asshole. If I tell my boyfriend
how disappointed I am in the date he took me on,
I feel like we always.
Speaker 3 (18:07):
Talk about women be so mean.
Speaker 1 (18:08):
But just hear the story first. That's all I'm gonna say.
Listen to the story first. For background, my boyfriend doesn't
make a lot of money. This is the first problem,
but I digress. We're gonna keep going. I don't mind
this at all, but it also means we don't go
out much because he doesn't like me paying for him.
This is the second problem, because now you're you're you're making.
Speaker 2 (18:29):
This so we can't go out so the car I
ain't got no dose the cain got no seat bill,
but were driving okay okay.
Speaker 1 (18:36):
When he told me he wanted to take me to
a nice dinner on him, I was pleasantly surprised. Turns
out his mom had given him a fifty dollars voucher
for a nice restaurant nearby, and he said he saved
up a bit of money to cover the rest jesu,
(18:56):
but you better have enough to cover that even like,
even without the coupone is is it over?
Speaker 3 (19:03):
No?
Speaker 1 (19:06):
He had been to this restaurant before and had always
raved about the beef Wellington.
Speaker 3 (19:10):
I was excited.
Speaker 1 (19:12):
We got there and sat down and he ordered a beer,
so I follow suit and got the same.
Speaker 3 (19:17):
He made a comment about just one and then waters
after this, okay, oh car.
Speaker 1 (19:24):
We started looking at the menu and again he was
raving about the beef Wellington. I said it sounded amazing
and I think I'll try that. Then he says, okay, great,
so I'll order that. Now let's maybe look at some
of the pastas huh. I was confused for a minute.
Then he pointed out a penne a la vodka, the
(19:44):
cheapest item on the menu, and mentioned how good that looked.
I agreed, but said, what happened to one in the
beef Wellington. He said, yeah, I'm gonna order that, and
I was thinking the penne for you.
Speaker 3 (19:57):
Then we can try both. Yeah, the tie just pop
or we not done yet? And we not done. We're
still rolling, y'all, we're still rolling. Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (20:10):
I caught on at this point that the budget went
and cover us both getting a pricey meal, so I
agreed to order the pasta. I was a bit annoyed,
but whatever. I also noticed at this point that there's
a plate splitting fee on the menu. To be honest,
I don't really know what that is exactly. By assume
it means there's a fee if you want to split
the meals between you. We put our food orders in
(20:35):
and our drinks are empty at this point, so I
asked for water like he indicated, because remember he said,
after this, we just getting water. He then orders another
beer from himself. Now I'm a bit more annoyed.
Speaker 3 (20:54):
He wants you to die.
Speaker 1 (21:01):
I did consider telling him I would pay for my
portion just so I could order things I actually wanted,
but I didn't want to imply that he wasn't spending
enough money on me, and he was so excited about
taking me out and paying for it himself. Says, from
the bottom of my heart, No he wasn't. No, he wasn't. No,
he wasn't.
Speaker 3 (21:18):
No, he wasn't.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
You. Anyway, our food comes and he's in heaven I met.
The pasta was actually amazing as well. I had a
bite of his, but declined when he offered to put
half of it on my plate out of fear of
the previously mentioned plate spitting faith. He ordered another two
beers for himself. Throughout the dinner, I didn't end up
finishing my meal because honestly, I was just uncomfortable most
(21:44):
of the time. Then at the end they came with
the bill and a box for my leftovers, and he
takes the box of leftover pasta and says, I can't
wait for my mom to try this. She's going to
be so happy that there's some left for her. I
(22:08):
thanked him for the meal, but I think he could
tell my mood was off. I know he was trying
to do something nice, but honestly, the whole thing just
felt a bit disrespectful.
Speaker 3 (22:17):
Would I be the asshole if I bring it up
to him. It was the I can't wait for my
mom to try this for me.
Speaker 2 (22:22):
You feel me, That's how I'm feeling like you Been
know you had to know he was like that.
Speaker 3 (22:27):
He couldn't have just popped up like that.
Speaker 2 (22:29):
You've been accepting mediocre everything you had to be unless it's.
Speaker 3 (22:34):
The wee wee. If she Been knew he was not shit.
Speaker 1 (22:39):
You at least knew he was like well, I won't
say cheap, but you knew he already was frugal.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
Yeah, you knew he was broke.
Speaker 1 (22:45):
It is what it is, but it's a difference. It's
a difference between broke. Considerate.
Speaker 3 (22:52):
You're gonna take my left obles, nigga.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
After you done talk me up about this beef Wellington
for weeks and I couldn't even get nothing but a
bite nick well then technically hold on weight. Here's another.
Here's another, here's another standpoint. Let's not forget the mom
did give him the fifty dollars about.
Speaker 3 (23:09):
Your I don't care, so maybe she was expecting to
bring you something back. Then take your mammy out. Don't
do me like that. That's fair? Like what that's fair?
Why y'all don't have a mic. They're not gonna be
able to hear you.
Speaker 2 (23:23):
Guys not as crazy. Oh my gosh, she would have
been what would you do?
Speaker 3 (23:32):
I have bet that is up. Okay, how do you
make your ass up? You already have to you already
at the table. What do you do now?
Speaker 2 (23:41):
Get a bat of there, take myself to go eat something.
I really won't post it on my story, and sit
there by myself like first date, kind of nervous.
Speaker 3 (23:49):
It's her boyfriend.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
I do feel like when she was like, oh well,
I didn't want to, you know, disrespect him because he
was so excited about paying, and I would have been
excited about eating it and drinking. So we both gotta
be excited. One of us can't be excited, but one
of us not. So I don't sound like a bitch.
Speaker 3 (24:05):
Okay. The thing is, you got to feel a fifty
dollar gift card from your mom. Cool. That's great. You
said you got enough to pay for the resk. Cool.
Speaker 2 (24:13):
I know you lacking resources anyway. Cool, I'm thankful. Cool,
But now you're taking advantage of the fact that I'm
accepting this type of behavior and you showing your.
Speaker 3 (24:22):
Drunk as natural born ass like now, it's a problem now.
Speaker 2 (24:27):
I know you don't really value me. You wanted to
do this for you. It wasn't an us thing. You're
not excited to pay for it for me. You just
would have felt guilty if you came and did this
shit by yourself.
Speaker 3 (24:36):
That's what you're giving, Yes, especially because you be broke. Yes,
that's what you're giving.
Speaker 2 (24:40):
What you should have did is on your work break,
take that fifty dollars gift card.
Speaker 3 (24:45):
Eat that shit by yourself. Bring me the leftovers. Ma
oh shit, Okay, cool, you want out with y'all?
Speaker 2 (24:50):
Okay, cool, and figure something else out or be cheaper
and shit, go to the grocery store and we could
cook at the crib or something.
Speaker 3 (24:57):
Take it out under the start, do something either doing that.
Speaker 1 (25:01):
Unacceptable, Do any of those things, or do what moms
do every day.
Speaker 3 (25:06):
Eat your food in the car before you come in
the house.
Speaker 1 (25:08):
Get your food eating in a car before you come
in the house, like every other mother.
Speaker 3 (25:12):
Okay, that's what you need to do.
Speaker 2 (25:15):
Even if you went there ordered to beef Wellington out
the size and shit like that and brought it home and.
Speaker 3 (25:19):
We split it. I'm cool with this. Yes, it's so.
Speaker 2 (25:24):
Many ways around being broke to still be happy. But
that was Selfish's hell, hate me? You hate mee beer?
Speaker 3 (25:34):
No water? You hate me? You gonna drink the beer
in front of me, knowing I want to live up.
You hate me? You know they called me stone cold.
I need more than one beer. You know that you
hate you? Run all right? So one more?
Speaker 1 (25:51):
Am I the asshole for eating before my date arrived
to the restaurant?
Speaker 3 (25:55):
How was he late?
Speaker 1 (25:56):
So for contexts, I am not a foodie. I eat
to get full and not as an experience. I'll often
eat at home before dinning outing before dinner outings just
because I don't want to wait and rather enjoy the
experience of the outing, which for me doesn't involve the
eating portion. I met the score online and we agreed
on meeting at a restaurant for dinner to get to
(26:18):
know each other more. Fast forward day of our date.
We agreed to meeting at nine pm. Now, my day
was super busy with work and I just didn't get
to eat lunch. It's almost eight pm and I'm starving,
so I get ready and head to the date still
having no food. I like getting to a date early
so I can check out the environment, pick the best seats,
and just prepare in general. So I have arrived about
(26:40):
forty five minutes early this time.
Speaker 3 (26:42):
I think that's strange. Forty five minutes early, and what
are you doing? Case and the joint? Why the fuck
are you there so early?
Speaker 1 (26:49):
You plan an access though, you gotta that's creepy, creepy,
that's creepy.
Speaker 3 (26:55):
What about that's creepy? Forty five minutes early?
Speaker 2 (26:58):
I'm saying out it's it's a way. What if he
had to put his name on the list? He that's
provision of.
Speaker 3 (27:05):
Forty five minutes is a little excessive.
Speaker 1 (27:07):
If VX me still starving, I decided I should eat
to get that out of the way, or I'll be
hungry and cranky having to wait another hour or so
before I could eat. I finished my meal and ordered
a cocktail. By this point, my date is almost arriving.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
Okay, okay, that's creepy.
Speaker 1 (27:28):
She gets to the restaurant and we instantly click. She's smiling,
We're having a great conversation, she's touching my hand. It's
overall going extremely well. Eventually she asks if I would
like to order some food, to which I respond, no,
thank you. I'm not hungry, and she insists, saying she
doesn't want to eat alone. But I tell her don't
(27:49):
worry and eat and that I'm enjoying my cocktail. Now
here's my problem. I do not like eating by myself, period.
I never like eating myself. That's like one of my
pet peeves, like I need here, have a little bit
of something, get some fries or something. I just don't
like eating by myself, Like I don't know what it is.
So I get her when she saying she don't like
to eat alone, I get.
Speaker 2 (28:12):
So.
Speaker 1 (28:12):
We called the waiter over it, and she starts asking
him for recommendations, to which she responds with no ill
intentions that it seemed I really enjoyed the tacos, so
maybe she should try them. I'm gonna tell you why.
I don't give a fuck, and I feel like that
waiter said the right thing. Right, You've been holding up
this fucking table for two hours.
Speaker 3 (28:34):
And you only has.
Speaker 1 (28:35):
No I'm gonna say, as a former server, you're holding
up the line and stopping my bag like she's not
eating you already ate you're holding up my table.
Speaker 3 (28:46):
Somebody else would come in and be ordering fucking shots.
Get here, I don't. I'm glad the waiter play I hated.
I'm gonna enjoy shit.
Speaker 1 (28:56):
At this point, she's confused and acts, what does that mean?
So I told her I ate some tacos before she arrived.
She immediately becomes furious, saying I'm rude and who eats
before a date has even arrived. I explained to her
that my goal was to get to know her and
the eating portion wasn't important, regardless the.
Speaker 3 (29:18):
Whole mood change. She ordered some food, ate and made
an excuse to have to go and leave.
Speaker 1 (29:24):
I haven't heard from her since then, and that was
last night, so a my asshole, lucky.
Speaker 3 (29:31):
Getting there early ain't an issue? You good? Getting there
early ain't an issue eating.
Speaker 2 (29:36):
A full meal and having a cocktail before I even
put my ass on this, Like, see, that's a problem.
Speaker 3 (29:41):
A meal? You couldn't get some fries?
Speaker 2 (29:43):
She should have just invited me to coffee. Bruh, we're
like what, I wouldn't.
Speaker 3 (29:47):
Be mad at you on your second line save by
the time I get there something like that. But a meal,
we're supposed to be eating and joining each other.
Speaker 2 (29:53):
Man, I feed you a list something you feed me
like you know It's an intimacy that could be there
that you just.
Speaker 3 (29:59):
You.
Speaker 1 (30:01):
I couldn't get no spinach dip, okay, no my currella sticks?
Speaker 3 (30:07):
You got full tacos, some kind of flower nothing.
Speaker 1 (30:10):
You called yourself being considerate, but not consider enough to
wait for her to eat.
Speaker 2 (30:15):
Yeah, maybe a couple of tea chips or some shit
with some sauce on it, you know what I mean,
little something I was starting. Baby, I'm sorry, I had
me a little tea chair.
Speaker 3 (30:24):
But let's order, you know, boneless, what something?
Speaker 2 (30:27):
I'm good, I'm enjoying my cocktail. You didn't even say no,
I already ate. I'm so sorry.
Speaker 1 (30:31):
Nothing And why why the waiter had to tell me?
Why you ain't tell me?
Speaker 2 (30:35):
Why you ain't Why she gotta put you on front street?
Yeah she did right by eating doing her thing.
Speaker 3 (30:42):
Actually, I got it, man, I gotta go, gotta go.
Speaker 2 (30:45):
They seem like somebody that will, like try to have
good intentions about doing something for you, but because they
do that, they'll then also be selfish in that space
because they feel like they extended.
Speaker 3 (30:55):
Themselves so much.
Speaker 1 (30:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (30:56):
Yeah, that's a weird type of space to be in.
So I take it back. You might be you're weirdo, y'all.
I'm about forty five minutes earlier.
Speaker 3 (31:03):
That might be forty five minutes early. It is crazy.
That's ward enough time to get my sorella sticks. Twenty minutes.
Speaker 1 (31:09):
Twenty minutes is spare because I feel like most of
the time you go to a restaurant, if it's like
during happy hour or something like that, they'll tell you
it's like a twenty minute week.
Speaker 3 (31:16):
Twenty minutes is spare. That's considerate.
Speaker 2 (31:18):
Yeah, because I'm just thinking, like, maybe you're doing this,
so the better time I get in there, I could
just walk straight to it's able to sit down, do
my whole thing.
Speaker 3 (31:24):
You know.
Speaker 2 (31:25):
I thought that was very intentional, very sweet, but eating
a whole meal prior too.
Speaker 3 (31:30):
You hate me like you hate me. I'm back to this.
Speaker 1 (31:33):
So if this is your brother, it comes to you
and tell this story, what advice would you give him?
Speaker 3 (31:39):
Nigga? You a food? Are you like? Okay? Who raised you?
Who raised you? That's what I would say, What the
fuck raise? You didn't get that from outside of the family.
Do you like her?
Speaker 2 (31:47):
I clearly don't like her. You hate her? Leave her alone.
You're gonna cause no problems.
Speaker 3 (31:52):
Don't do that. Leave he alone.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
Yeah, you know, I felt like this conversation wouldn't be
complete without really honing in on you and the dopest
things you have going on and coming out.
Speaker 3 (32:08):
So can you talk to us a little bit about
your project?
Speaker 1 (32:10):
So?
Speaker 2 (32:10):
I just released the song. It's called work to Do.
It's on our platforms. It's the women empowerment song about
all the work that we put in on it every
single day just to be our great, beautiful selves. I
got a project coming out later this year, but while
we wait for that, it's other songs that's out.
Speaker 3 (32:27):
Bag Lady, as you start a bag that myself. I
love it me real craft. That's so cute. It's cute. Yes,
bring you one, please do that. It's so cute. I
didn't know you made that. That's fire. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:39):
I got a self love anthem called I Choose Me,
So remake an international players anthem because you know, is
now okay?
Speaker 3 (32:46):
Then? And who got it together? Come on somebody? Yeah? Yeah,
what we got accountability? Send me?
Speaker 2 (32:53):
So we're gonna we're gonna marinate. Don't know until the
project coming out later. There's plenty of music, plenty of
good vibes, plenty of good energy that you could tap
into from deja vu on our platforms.
Speaker 3 (33:02):
Okay, enjoy the ride, Gonna great? I love that. Tell
people where they can find you.
Speaker 2 (33:08):
You can find me on Instagram, YouTube, all platforms, and music, Apple, Spotify,
title wherever. Just type in deja vu d a jha
v u. My tag handle is d a jha v
you U. I'm still working on trying to get my
regular name from somebody.
Speaker 3 (33:24):
Oh girl, let me tell you something. I can't posted
twenty thirteen. Get my name.
Speaker 1 (33:30):
I went on TikTok the other day to start a
personal TikTok page and somebody had my name and they
didn't just have my name, they used all my pictures
from Instagram. And then I told TikTok take it down.
And I can't even select myself as they're impersonating me.
Speaker 3 (33:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:46):
Yeah, I just had to report a couple of pages
on TikTok for doing the same thing. And it might
be some creepy asx.
Speaker 3 (33:52):
Oh the dok told you? Oh hell no me? Oh shit,
Well listen, wen, we're gonna figure it out. Yeah, but
step in with deja Vue d a j h j
a v u on aur.
Speaker 2 (34:04):
Platforms my music, my visuals, everything's coming out and it's
a beautiful ride of just shit, self expansion, self growth,
self realization, and.
Speaker 1 (34:14):
I want you to come with me. So yeah, hell yeah,
hell yeah. I mean my message is always gonna be
the same. Follow me on the Gram, ask for me,
p P E A at chocolate Chip and sip And
if you don't remember anything else, please remember.
Speaker 3 (34:26):
In the words of dja Vu, you hate me. I
love you, guys, and I'll see you next week.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
The Male Room with Dr. Jesse Mills
As Director of The Men’s Clinic at UCLA, Dr. Jesse Mills has spent his career helping men understand their bodies, their hormones, and their health. Now he’s bringing that expertise to The Male Room — a podcast where data-driven medicine meets common sense. Each episode separates fact from hype, science from snake oil, and gives men the tools to live longer, stronger, and happier lives. With candor, humor, and real-world experience from the exam room and the operating room, Dr. Mills breaks down the latest health headlines, dissects trends, and explains what actually works — and what doesn’t. Smart, straightforward, and entertaining, The Male Room is the show that helps men take charge of their health without the jargon.