Ep. 201 How Taylor Swift’s “Life of a Showgirl” Interview Can Help Midlife Listeners Cope with Holiday Stress, Anxiety & Chaos

Can Taylor Swift’s approach to calm help you manage midlife stress and anxiety this holiday season? (OMG, is she really talking about holidays???)
You’re not alone — even the most grounded people feel the pull of pressure and expectation this time of year.
In this episode, you’ll discover:
1.    How Taylor Swift’s choice to protect her peace can inspire your own midlife coping skills.
2.    Why setting intentions now helps reduce stress, anxiety, and overwhelm later in the season.
3.    Simple, science-backed ways to trade pressure for presence and design the calm you crave.
 Take 8 minutes to shift from holiday stress to midlife calm — you’re worth it.

Send us a text

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About the Host:
MJ Murray Vachon LCSW is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker with more than 48,000 hours of therapy sessions and 31 years of experience teaching her Mental Wellness curriculum, Inner Challenge. Four years ago she overcame her fear of technology to create a podcast that integrated her vast clinical experience and practical wisdom of cultivating mental wellness using the latest information from neuroscience. MJ was Social Worker of the Year in 2011 for Region 2/IN.

Creating Midlife Calm is a podcast designed to guide you through the challenges of midlife, tackling issues like anxiety, low self-esteem, feeling unworthy, procrastination, and isolation, while offering strategies for improving relationships, family support, emotional wellbeing, mental wellness, and parenting, with a focus on mindfulness, stress management, coping skills, and personal growth to stop rumination, overthinking, and increase confidence through self-care, emotional healing, and mental health support.

Episode Transcript

MJ Murray Vachon LCSW (00:00):
In this episode, you'll discover how to
shape the spirit of your holidayseason before it shapes you.
Welcome to Creating MidlifeCalm, the podcast where you and
I tackle stress and anxiety inmidlife so you can stop feeling
like crap, feel more present athome, and thrive at work.
I'm MJ Murray Vachon a LicensedClinical Social Worker with over

(00:24):
50,000 hours of therapy sessionsand 32 years of teaching
practical science-backed mentalwellness.
Welcome to the podcast.
It's October, and anyone inmidlife knows what's ahead.
In this episode, you'll discoverhow taking a page from Taylor
Swift's playbook can help youmove into the holidays with less

(00:46):
dread and more calm.
You'll explore how to pausebefore the rush begins so you
can decide what kind of energyyou want to have this season and
how small choices, including howyou use your phone, can create a
calmer, more connected holiday.
On Monday, your Inner Challengewas to take 10 to 15 minutes

(01:08):
that you'd usually spendscrolling and trade it for
something that fills your tank,like baking cookies, writing a
note, or going for a walk thismorning I woke up to a text from
a friend who listened to thepodcast and baked cookies.
That's exactly the kind ofsmall, intentional shift that
gives your brain space to thinkclearly and your heart space to

(01:31):
connect.
As you step into October, you'vealready started to feel it.
The pressure and anticipationthat comes with these three
months.
Yep.
The season is coming and beforethe whirlwind starts, I want you
to stop and ask what spirit doyou want inside you this year?
Maybe you want October to feellighter, fewer weekend

(01:54):
commitments.
Have you noticed how everyweekend in October has events
for Halloween?
Maybe you'd like more cozynights at home, or maybe
Halloween is your jam and youlove all of these events, and
you wanna lean in and go all outon decorating and handing out
candy.
Whatever You choose the key wordhere, is choose I want you to

(02:17):
consider what it would looklike, what it would feel like if
you actually designed yourholidays around calm and
enjoyment instead of pressure.
Because if you don't pause now,the season will choose for you
and you'll find yourself doingthings you don't even enjoy.
Wondering where your calm went.

(02:38):
Which leads me to one of myfavorite holiday stories a few
years ago, one of my midlifeclients hosted a No Phones
Thanksgiving, everyone, heradult kids, her mother, their
parents, even her husband, lefttheir phones in another room.
They brought printed recipes,music through the old speaker

(03:01):
system, and actually cookedtogether.
Midway through the meal prep,they realized they didn't have a
carving knife, so she went nextdoor to borrow one from her
elderly neighbor, who not onlylent her a beautiful electric
knife, but came over and showedthem how to carve the Turkey.
That tiny unexpected momentbecame the highlight of their

(03:23):
day.
When everyone finally got theirphones back, her daughter
texted, mom, can we do a nophones Christmas?
That's the power of attentionand the power of intention.
What if this year you gaveyourself a holiday season guided

(03:44):
by where you want your attentionto go, not where your phone
tries to pull it.
Which brings me to Christmas.
I know it feels early, but I'm already
having my clients talk about it.
Anxiety about money, stressabout family expectations, and
the feeling that the holidaysare more burden than joy.

(04:06):
What if this year you gentlyencouraged yourself to dial it
down?
To choose to do those thingsthat actually allow you to feel
grounded more calm andenjoyment.
A lot of my clients are feelinga real financial crunch.
Last week in session, one of myclients said, I have no idea how

(04:28):
we're gonna afford Christmasthis year.
I asked her to take a fewseconds, ground her feet, and
just move through that worry,that anxiety after she did that,
she looked at me and she said,you know, I could actually shop
secondhand stores early.
We could also do a scavengerhunt on Christmas morning where

(04:49):
finding their presents was partof the whole celebration.
And lastly, she said, I couldalso say finances are tight this
year.
Remember, honesty can actuallydeepen connection.
That simple pause, grounding herfeet, naming and taming her
worry, allowed her owncreativity to come up with

(05:12):
solutions.
Remember, you don't have tochase a picture perfect holiday.
Why not design one that matchesthe calm, the creativity that
you crave?
The truth is midlife holidayscan feel overwhelming because
your schedule is already full.
That's why I say you're not allthat different than Taylor Swift

(05:34):
during the ERAS tour.
You've got so much on your platework, caregiving, family
traditions, and emotional labor,but like Taylor Swift, you have
power over your attention.
She deletes the apps not to bedisciplined, but to be free, You
can do the same, not by tossingyour phone, but by choosing how

(05:57):
and when you give your attentionaway, it's about values.
Taylor protects what mattersmost to her, and you can do the
same this season.
Ask yourself, what if I use myphone for music that lifts me
up, or a podcast that groundsme?
And then I put it down so I canactually feel the moment I'm in.

(06:22):
That's how you shift the seasonfrom obligation to intention,
from overwhelm to calm.
In this episode, you discoveredhow to reclaim your holiday calm
before the chaos begins.
You learned how a small shift inattention can help you choose
the spirit you want this season,Less pressure, more calm and

(06:46):
enjoyment.
And you heard how no phoneThanksgiving turned a simple
meal into connection andcommunity.
Remember, your attention iscurrency.
Spend it on what helps youcreate real connection and calm.
If the stress starts buildingwell, as Taylor says, shake it

(07:08):
off.
Let go of the guilt, thecomparison, and the constant
scrolling, and make room for thekind of joy that lasts.
And lastly, I wanna encourageyou to share this episode with
two friends, people who wannamove through the next three
months with the same values youdo.

(07:28):
Values that resist the culturalchaos and choose calm connection
and joy instead stead.
Thanks for listening, and I'llbe back on Monday with more
creating midlife calm.