November 5, 2025 • 42 mins
We talk with Stephanie Rose of Firefly Scout about using stream-of-consciousness journaling, energy awareness, and human design to turn midlife confusion into clear next steps. Practical stories show how small rituals like walking and flexible goals build self-trust.
• how journaling differs from diary writing
• building self-trust through mind–hand connection
• translating corporate skills into a purpose-led business
• women’s midlife crossroads and agency
• human design as a curiosity tool, not a label
• setting flexible, energy-aligned goals
• walking, voice notes, and simple daily rituals
• tracking glimmers and collecting evidence
• using patterns to renegotiate work and boundaries
• resources and where to find Stephanie online
Send me a text. We'd love to hear your opinion on the human design or anything that we've talked about.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Stephanie Rose (00:02):
Hi, I'm Carlene and this is Diva.
Tonight I have with me on ZoomStephanie Rose, and she is the
creator of Firefly Scouts.
She has a very interestingbackground when it comes to
energy work.
She knows a bit about the humandesign and also journaling.
(00:27):
I'm gonna get to that because Ithink it's very important.
Because in this day and agewith technology, I find like
journaling is something thatmaybe not many people do so much
anymore.
I'm not saying I don't have anystats to back that up, but I
feel like we text more than wewrite, and vice versa.
(00:48):
And so, Firefly Scout, tell memore about that.
What brought on this endeavor?
Carlene (00:56):
Well, I'm excited to talk with you about all the
things.
Yay! Firefly Scout came to beas I was like a midlife mom,
like finally starting to getenough sleep and like went on my
own self-discovery journey oflike, who am I?
What do I want?
The old ways weren't quiteworking anymore.
But I didn't know where thatnext direction was, and having
(01:19):
like taken on this new identityof being a mom while working in
corporate, and you know, liketrying to live my life and like
those old parts of you that arestill like wanting to show up
too.
So I was trying to like figureall of that out.
And journaling is actually whatsparked all of that.
Um, I had done a program calledThe Artist's Way, which
(01:40):
promotes like stream ofconsciousness journaling, and I
had never done it that way.
I was always more of like adiary writer.
Like today I did this andlisting more like facts and
details versus getting and intoanything that was like feelings,
or if I did, I was very likecagey or sketchy about actually
(02:01):
like writing them down.
And so this like stream ofconsciousness journaling was
such a freeing way, like even ifwhatever I was putting on the
page was just whatever flowedout, it created space, mental,
emotional space for me to likeorganize some thoughts and tie
up some loose ends with things.
(02:22):
And then as I had more space,then I had like ideas that I
wanted to explore and just likewell, what if?
And then it started to feellike more creative and it became
like something I could reallycount on to like have the outlet
to just pour it out again.
Even if it wasn't like all likesuch profound things, it was
(02:42):
just a great way to like wordvomit everything out and just
even like I'm sitting here atthe counter and I don't know
what to write, and but today wasthis, and then just wherever it
flowed.
So through that, I I got enoughor my thoughts started to
organize enough, and like I wantto do something to really help
others with this.
Cause like I was realizing likeI'm not alone in this kind of
(03:06):
lost and stuck feeling.
And so then I started to pullit together into a business,
really getting in touch withwhat you feel.
And it's not even just likeyour feelings, but just like
noticing like the energy withinyou and like kind of like what
you sense and what what youneed, like those parts of you
need, so you can actuallyrespond to them and fulfill it.
(03:28):
So that's how it all came to beand really did evolve from
journaling.
Stephanie Rose (03:34):
So you said you left corporate America.
So what were you doing beforeyou started a Firefly Scout?
Carlene (03:43):
I was doing like program management, working with
um in a manufacturing settingto making sure that the dealers
were getting product andcompleting their projects on
time.
So it was there was a lot oflike relationships there and
communication and processes andyou know, following protocols
both within our corporate, withour clients' corporate, with the
(04:07):
dealers that each had their ownset of things.
So it was really like a lot ofballs in the air, and like
seeing that you know, somethingthat happened in one realm
actually had ripple effectssomewhere else, and trying to
keep all that in mind so thateveryone was like on board and
understood why some we weredoing something here that didn't
(04:30):
make sense to them.
Stephanie Rose (04:32):
So, how do you feel like that industry, like
being a project manager, helpedyou with your business now?
Carlene (04:40):
Managing chaos is really like just a life skill we
all need.
I just got paid for it in thatcapacity.
Um but just seeing like youhave so many like stakeholders
with different versions ofsuccess to them, like success
for the client means somethingdifferent than success to you as
the manufacturer, and somethingelse to like the installer or
(05:03):
the end user.
So, like understanding, likeI've always been really good at
seeing other people's points ofview and kind of mediating all
of that to help bridge the gapsthat people might have between
uh what's in what's important intheir world and what's
important in the other people'sworlds.
And so I'm kind of carryingthat into the business of like
(05:25):
doing that just for yourself andbeing able to handle all the
stakeholders of people in yourlife and really just give
yourself some perspective to seeit that way instead of being
caught in the swirl of all thethings, yeah.
Stephanie Rose (05:40):
Speaking of all the things, like we're all busy
working, trying to manageeverything.
Before we get into what youhelp your clients do and like
what you help other women do,this podcast is a series devoted
to women in their 40s.
And so with that being said, doyou feel like at this stage in
(06:03):
life, women who are 40 to 49,that it's kind of like a
crossroads where you're likefiguring your life out, but also
dealing with like possiblehealth concerns and doing the
things, right?
What do you think is moreimportant now than ever before?
Like in terms of setting goalsand changing careers if you have
(06:26):
to?
Like, I guess I'm asking morethan one question, but the main
question is with journaling, howdo you feel from how it would
help anyone now that'sstruggling with life and their
goals?
Carlene (06:42):
40s is like really prime for this type of confusion
because up until this point,you've probably been living up
to some sort of storyline thatyou've been following, like
education, career, family, youknow, becoming an adult,
stabilizing in that.
And then you the roadmap kindof ends in just like, oh, until
(07:05):
retirement.
Like there's this like big gap.
So you're like right at thebeginning of this gap until you
hit the this mysterious realm ofretirement.
And so this is the time whereyou might start to like kind of
look around and realize, like,is this even where I wanted to
end up?
Is this the trajectory I wantto stay on for the next 20
(07:26):
years?
And so it can be confusing toreally realize, like, oh, like
maybe I didn't have as muchagency in my life as I thought,
because subconsciously I wasfollowing this path that has
been kind of pushed on us, liketo go of what success looks
like.
And it's not bad, but you'reyou're just like, is this all
(07:49):
there is now?
Like you're kind of doing likeand then you realize like you
actually have the power to likechoose your next thing.
Like, are you gonna stay inthat job?
Are you gonna is there a dreamin your heart that like you've
been ignoring?
And there's maybe a little bitmore capacity to like uh start
listening.
And in this range, you'restarting to see like your
(08:11):
parents getting older and orjust witnessing more people like
maybe having some end of lifeuh regrets or wishes that like
because their time like theirend is very close.
So like where that horizon linehas felt just so far away in
your 40s, you're starting tonotice like there really is an
end point, and it startscreating that little bit of time
(08:33):
pressure on you because itdoesn't feel so infinite
anymore.
And that's where journaling canbe really helpful because when
we just stay in our head and theswirl of the thoughts and the
feelings, and we don't like getthem anchored out and like
really like we have feelings andthings that cannot have they
don't have the access to words,but we have to try.
(08:56):
And so when you pause longenough to journal and just let
things just flow out and don'tcensor what you're saying or
trying to like shape intocohesive thoughts that you know
are gonna be so meaningful toyou later, like taking that time
to pause, like one, we're notrewarded for rest.
The idea of saying, Well, Itook a mental break and wrote
(09:19):
out my feelings is not somethingwe like get celebrated for.
Right, right, yeah.
And then like just kind of likeanchoring some things, like
getting it onto the page thatthe mind-hand connection to like
physically write it out, likeit's an expression out of you.
Like your handwriting is anexpression of you.
(09:40):
And so, like you can look atyour handwriting and see like
kind of how you're feeling, likeit's a reflection of it.
Like if you're if it's reallytight and cramped, like that can
actually be assigned to you,like, oh, like I'm actually
feeling something maybedifferent than I thought
underneath because it's comingthrough and on literally on the
page.
And like like you censoryourself so much, but when you
(10:02):
can just free yourself from thatand just get it onto the page,
like you just start to buildthat sense of trust with what
your heart is really saying andthings that really need to come
out, and you're addressing likethat mental energy within you
and your emotional energy tolike help put some sense to what
(10:24):
you're doing, and that and youhave some evidence of like what
things keep coming up becauseyou wrote them down.
You can go back to them and belike, I've been saying this a
lot.
And it's one thing if you sayit to a friend or like they're
not as gonna call you out on it,or they may not notice you know
the pattern you keep saying,but when you write it down, that
(10:46):
gives you just more of aconcrete thing of like, I've
been saying this a lot lately,and then that can help you know
build some problem awarenessawareness of like where you need
to focus, like your energynext.
Stephanie Rose (11:01):
So for you, I remember reading on Firefly
Scout that you journaled for isit almost a year?
Like you were on this pathwhere you didn't take a break
from journaling.
It was kind of like uh, well,more or less the self-discovery.
Carlene (11:18):
Yeah, like the artist's way is like a 12-week program
that you can do, but then I wasgetting so much out of it, like
I kept going, like maybe not asregularly, but still just really
using that as a way to likekeep letting stuff out and like
refining it.
Stephanie Rose (11:36):
Just getting it out of the swirl of my head to
like a more grounded place.
And when you did that, what didyou discover about yourself?
Carlene (11:47):
It gave me a chance to really like honor, like, you
know, maybe what I'm missing inlife, like where I thought I'd
be right now, what I thoughtthis stage of life would feel
like, gave me space to like behonest about like what I do and
don't like about stuff,especially like career-wise,
(12:07):
with things of like theobligations that it puts on you,
and realizing like I didn't fitinto the role anymore.
So through that, as I keptgoing with it, when there was a
time for to like re kajiggerlike job responsibilities, I
used journaling and some listmaking to just really pick
(12:27):
apart, like what did I reallylove doing in life and in my job
and uh all the things withthat?
But so I can really like startto differentiate what did I
actually love to do, what was uhreally stressful for me to do?
What was like not a growth kindof friction, but just like a
tension that wasn't expanding meand really like explore those
(12:49):
nuances.
And because I had it writtendown, I like come back and
reference it and refer back toit, and then use that.
Like like I said, in my jobthen when we were kind of
rearranging responsibilities, Icould better articulate like
this is what I love doing, thisis what makes work and life feel
good for me.
(13:09):
And it worked out like by mesaying what I love to do, by all
the things I could say yes to,I actually didn't have to say
all the things that I didn'tlike doing because I was
inviting all these things, like,yes, this these are the things
I'm really great at doing.
I want to put part of myresponsibility.
And as a result, like I won'thave time for these things now,
(13:32):
but I didn't have to say likewhy to like because like a lot
of travel was tough doing umlike RFP deadline based things
that was like conducive to uhyoung motherhood.
Like I I didn't have thatavailability on tight time
frames.
Like didn't mean I couldn't dothe work, it just that type of
(13:53):
work wasn't aligned for me.
So like it just gave me so muchmore confidence to say, like,
no, this is what I really lovedoing, and this is what I don't,
without having to say I can'tdo that anymore.
Like, not letting thoserealities of other parts of my
life like hold me back.
So that was another way, liketaking the time to like write it
(14:14):
out and notice these things andbeing really curious about like
where your energy flowsnaturally makes it so much makes
life so much easier.
Stephanie Rose (14:25):
So when we think about like who you are now and
where the path took you, let'sgo from the beginning.
It's always interesting to hearhow people like how their
journey has gotten them.
Like it's I always say this,it's not where you're going,
it's where you came from.
(14:45):
And the journey to get thereobviously took you to where you
are now.
And this company you created tohelp women with their goals,
their ambitions, and just theprocess of figuring who you are
out.
So when you were younger, didyou like to write?
(15:06):
Was journaling a big thing foryou?
What were what interested youwhen you were a kid?
Carlene (15:11):
I did journal some.
Like I said, it was more oflike a diary entry.
Like, you know, I worked at amovie theater.
So, like who I worked with, howmany cotton candy bags I did
that day.
Like, like, yes, there weresome feelings in there, but it
was because I thought that's howyou were supposed to do it.
Stephanie Rose (15:29):
Like, yeah, like I remember, like, you know, you
watch these shows, like, andthe girl's always writing her
journal or her diary, deardiary, today, you know.
Like, if you watch, I rememberHarrier the Spy, where she
didn't write the typicaljournal, but she was a spy, so
she used that as a way.
But like all these other shows,like me too.
I used to write a diary becauseI was just like, that was the
(15:52):
one way I could release, likewrite out my feelings, you know,
at a as a young child.
Like I always wrote, and thenfrom journaling, I would write
poems, you know what I mean?
And so I remember writing thisone poem that won this little
contest in school or whatever.
I think it was like the newslab newspaper.
So writing has always been mything too, and it's helped me
(16:14):
remember because my short-termmemory is horrible.
Like, and you know, I know thatfor a fact when I get
introduced to people, I'm like,what's their name again?
But like getting back to thejournaling thing, obviously it's
a there's a little part of itthat was part of like your
growing up and working at themovie theater.
So, do you like movies?
Was that like a thing for youas well?
Carlene (16:35):
No, that was more it was a cool place to work.
And yeah, my parents said, ifyou want a car, you gotta get a
job.
So I went and got a job.
But I did like it because likeit had you weren't always on,
like, yes, you're dealing with alot of people, but in between
shows, it's quiet.
So, like that kind of rhythmactually works for me.
(16:58):
I didn't know it at the time,but like if you were doing
something in retail where likeyou're just dealing with
customers like all the time,like I don't think I could
handle that.
But knowing like there is thispattern, I could anticipate and
prepare for it, like, and it waslike okay, and you know, fun
people to work with too.
Stephanie Rose (17:16):
Yeah, it's interesting you say that because
I work in retail with lots ofpeople, and I think like after a
day of dealing with people, Ineed the downtime because it's
it takes a lot of energy to dealwith people, to answer
questions, to deal with likecoworkers' different moods and
like be on it all the time.
So yeah, it's definitely athing.
(17:36):
And for whoever's listening,it's very interesting because
Stephanie and I spoke prior andwe're both April babies.
And so I'm April 11th andyou're the 13th.
And I think it's veryinteresting how you know we
connected um the way we did.
And so, as part of that, Ithink it's interesting because I
(17:57):
didn't tell you, I didn't, Idon't know if I sent you my
human design report because wewere talking about that as well.
And I totally forgot to sendyou what it is, but I know I'm a
generator, and so I give offenergy.
People can sense it.
Like I've had so many peopletell me they're like, I can tell
you're a people person, or likethere's just something about
that.
Carlene (18:17):
So I don't know if you know what you are, if you're a
generator as well, or what yourhuman design is, but I'm
actually a splenic projector,and I only learned that a few
years ago, but I was always likeon the fringe of like, oh,
like, yeah, let me read myhoroscope type thing, like in
the magazine, but I never likecared about so much.
(18:39):
But um, a few years ago I wasintroduced to human design.
I'm like, oh, that'sinteresting, like, yeah, it
makes sense.
And I was busy doing otherthings, like getting the
business going.
And then I came back to thatreport and I was like, oh, like
there's a lot here.
And it gave me like more wordsto understand or things like
notice, like, oh, I nevernoticed that about my energy
(19:00):
before.
And so now in hindsight, I'mlike, well, of course that
worked for me or didn't work forme, because that's not how I
best operate to know myself.
So, like working at the movietheater, like because I could
like there were like the rhythmsthrough the time, like based on
(19:21):
when the shows were, that'swhen we would be busy or not
busy.
And I could like know thatit'll only be busy for like 30
minutes, and then it'll calmback down, and then we can do
more, like you know, thecleaning, the resetting and
stuff.
And that way, and when you'reat a movie theater, you're just
selling tickets, sellingconcessions, or like people
aren't coming at you with awhole bunch of different
(19:43):
requests, like you're doing likeone kind of narrow focused
thing, and like that worked wellfor me.
But if like fielding a lot oflike requests from all over the
place, like that can be moretaxing in some ways, so like
it's not as aligned for me.
Yeah, because like otherpeople's energy just it's too
(20:04):
much pinging off of me, so it'shaving a moment.
Like, there's so many thingsthat go beyond just like your
type with it, but yeah, uh yeah,like learning that flavor of
astrology was like, oh, becauseI was already invested in
knowing myself and figuringthese things out about myself,
(20:25):
but it just gives you like kindof like a map to start being
curious about, like with somenames.
Like, is this me?
Like, yes, and like with myastrology, I never really
resonated with my sun sign untilI heard like the right
interpretation of it.
I'm like, oh now I see, like,as an Aries, they always say
(20:47):
it's like leader and bold.
I'm like, that's not quite me.
But then I heard that it couldbe like a pioneering type
energy, like, and that resonatedmore because it's like, no, I
love exploring and figuring outnew things, and it's just
finding like the right words,just tying back into the
journaling.
You you find the right words toexplain what you sense or you
(21:12):
feel, and like everythingchanges for you.
Bruce Hayward (21:16):
Diva tonight, glamour for your ears.
This is 40, a femaleperspective.
Stephanie Rose (21:23):
You know, sometimes I feel like the
universe connects us with peoplethat will that we need or that
are gonna help you.
And I think even through thiscommunity pod match, I've met
some very, very smart people.
And like I'm sensing with youthat we have a lot in common.
We I mean, we did when we firsttalked, but the more you tell
(21:45):
me about the things that youlike and the things that you do,
like I spent like yourself alot of time reading.
Reading was my escape.
I read all the Anna GreenGables books.
I read like whenever the chaoswas happening in my in my
childhood, my escape was thelibrary, the quiet place.
(22:06):
Like it was like for me, Iloved it there.
I spent so many hours in thelibrary, and and now that I'm
older, I don't read as much.
I still have books and I I'mtrying to read more, but yeah,
it's it was it was a thing.
I I was obsessed with it to thepoint where my mom's friend was
like, Don't you think you mightgo a little crazy from all that
(22:26):
reading?
I'm like, no, I don't think so.
In my mind, I didn't think itwas.
I thought it was it was great,you know what I mean?
This is like another place,just like the movies, right?
Is another form of escape fromreality and like it gives you
that either that happy ending orthat message or something,
right?
Carlene (22:45):
Yeah, because storytelling relies on like
archetypes and the naturalexpression of them, and there is
a flow to a story that feelssatisfying to us.
Like we all you've maybe reador watched some things like, oh,
like that didn't follow theflow of like how a story is
supposed to go, and they mayhave done it intentionally to
(23:06):
like jar you into thinking, orit was just poor storytelling.
But I love reading and storiesbecause I think it gives you a
chance not even to escape, butmaybe even see something about
you in those and some plant someseeds of possibility, like
well, that character did this.
Like when they rent facedsomething that was challenging,
(23:29):
what did they do?
Stephanie Rose (23:31):
Right.
Carlene (23:31):
And it it maybe isn't even that conscious that you're
like aware you're monitoringthat, but I started doing that
with the books that I read,like, oh, like noticing like the
arc of the story, like, ohyeah, there's 50 pages left that
the crisis is gonna happen,they're gonna um the
misunderstanding is gonnahappen.
But using that in your ownlife, like to understand, like
you're gonna havemisunderstandings, you're gonna
(23:53):
have a crisis, you're gonna havesomething where everything
seems like it's falling apart.
And but how do they figure itout?
What did they do?
Did they just give up?
Be like, yes.
Yeah, like in that way, likethat love of story can really
help you like stay optimisticthat like there's a way through.
And if it's not that it has tobe a happily ever after, but if
(24:15):
there's not like a satisfyingepilogue to it, the story's not
over.
Stephanie Rose (24:19):
Yeah.
Well, you know, I always referto either music or movies.
So when you say the crisis, Ithink of the movie our brand is
crisis.
This is a good movie.
It's a sad movie.
I saw it at TIF years ago, butalluding to that, I think
though, you know, like you weresaying with the whole reading,
how it can help you figure outhow you are as a person.
(24:44):
And so is there a characterthat you find that you identify
with?
Carlene (24:49):
I've read a few books that like leave me with like a
book hangover of like, oh, likeeven if it's not like I see
myself so much as the character,but just like the journey that
they went through, you feel youget so attached to it that it
like kind of sticks with you.
Like you can't shake it off.
So I had one, it was byAnnabelle Monahan.
(25:11):
I don't remember which one itwas.
Stephanie Rose (25:13):
Okay.
Carlene (25:13):
Because I've read all her books, but all of hers are
good.
It'll come to me.
I wasn't prepared.
Stephanie Rose (25:20):
It's the name of the I know, I know.
I didn't tell you, I didn'ttell you the things.
I told you some things, but wewon't talk about books too much.
I just thought it wasinteresting that we both have
that in common and also the thewhole thing with being in Aries
and being like the leader, thecenter of attention, whereas
sometimes I don't want to belike you, the center of
(25:41):
attention.
I don't want to be.
I can be.
In many instances, I feel likeI can be, but then sometimes I'm
like, I just want to like hideand not, you know, be there.
But what I want to say is thatwith human design, I didn't
learn about it until my sisterbrought it up.
And she was like, Oh, did youever hear about the human
design?
I'm like, no, what is that?
(26:02):
And then so I looked into itand then I got my report and I
was like, wow, this is sointeresting.
This is like another part of methat I didn't know, like how
your energy could dictate likeeverything in your life.
You know what I mean?
Like the path that you're goingto, your career, uh, people
that you meet.
And so it's anotherself-discovery, I think, in a
(26:25):
way.
Like I think human design,you're the first person I've met
who has that on their resume assomething that they're familiar
with.
And you said you're stilllearning about it.
So I thought that was sointeresting because it's
different than, you know, likeyou said, astrology and the
things, right?
So what do you what do youthink is um important to know
(26:49):
about human design?
Carlene (26:50):
Like, I think it's important to like to approach it
with curiosity.
Okay.
You don't have to believe thatthe moment you were born
dictates your energy, like froma cosmic way.
Yeah.
Like if you can suspend thatpart of it, just be like, just
approach it with the interestand curiosity of like, does this
(27:12):
sound like me?
And if you pair it with yourown contemplation and your own
self-knowledge that you'rediscovering, it can be a really
powerful tool to help you likestart looking first at something
versus like having everythingthat you're curious about.
If you're like, well, what youknow, like what makes me feel
(27:33):
grounded?
What how am I meant to be likeradiant or shine?
What does following my purposelook like?
And if you ask or approach itfrom like the storytelling
standpoint of like what is thestory of this energy, see how it
resonates with you.
And if it doesn't, don't worryabout it.
But if you're feeling lost orstuck, like it is a great place
(27:58):
to start giving you some hooksand some words to start kind of
making your list of like, ohyeah, that sounds like me.
And I use the human designpaired with the glow map that I
came up with of like justunderstanding your energy inside
of you, like what you feel.
So, like how you your sense ofhow you feel physically,
(28:20):
emotionally, mentally.
What does your spiritual energyfeel like?
What's your connection energyfeel like?
And then you can get curious oflike, well, like what are the
rhythms that work well for me?
What are the creative outletsthat really like light me up,
that make me feel like the mostto me?
It's not meant to define you,it is meant to just help you
(28:44):
explore your curiosity aboutyourself with a little bit more
like focus.
Stephanie Rose (28:49):
Yeah.
No, I think I think it's true.
I read about it briefly, likeI've done some research on it,
but it's still an ongoingprocess, I think, for sure.
And I think like the wholething with journaling and you
know, journaling is so helpful.
Like, I think the more I do it,the more I understand it.
But I think they say it's moreof an internal thing.
(29:11):
So, what do you think aboutthat?
Like journaling and just beingcurious, because we talked about
two different thingsjournaling, journaling and the
human design, which is obviouslya way to understand who you
are, or just to be curious aboutother forms of, I guess it's
more of like a personality testor personality uh synopsis of
(29:33):
who you are and how you canfigure out what your gifts are,
or you know, just self discoveryin a way, right?
So, with journaling, how doesit help you with your goals and
setting goals?
And I think that's a lot, a lotof things, a lot of
conversations are happening withthat, like setting goals and
(29:54):
realizing where you want yourfuture to go, like in the next.
A month or three months, youknow.
Carlene (30:02):
Journaling is a great way to like bridge that
connection from your head toyour heart, that like like your
intuition, like what it reallywants you to know.
But the thoughts, fears,limitations, the stories that
your head is living by sometimesdon't let you.
But when you can like write itout on the page and like just
(30:24):
get things flowing and movingand they're not as sticky, then
like those truths can start tocome out.
And then you start noticingthose.
And then if you understand yourhuman design as like an added
layer of it, you can start toknow like what your intuition,
like how it speaks to you.
And it also helps you noticewhat you are and how other
(30:49):
people are.
Like other people havedifferent energy, they operate
in different ways.
So then maybe you don't takesomething as personally because
you actually understand howtheir energy works too.
And it's different than yours.
And so, like, that's whythere's frictions or tensions,
but it doesn't mean either ofyou are doing anything wrong.
(31:10):
It just means that like you'redifferent, and so that can open
you up to more empathy andunderstanding of other people
because you're not so caught upin your world, you're actually
connected into that space ofyou, and you can approach maybe
other people with moreunderstanding that they just
operate differently than you.
All of that can help you setgoals that are actually
(31:31):
meaningful to you in a way thatwill spell out success for you.
Like if you've created likesmart goals, specific,
measurable, attainable,realistic, and time-sensitive or
something.
Yeah.
Like those are great.
Like, that's very like rigidthinking, like, I will do this
for this, this, and I will getthis result.
(31:52):
Like, well, one, you don't knowif doing it that way is gonna
get you the result.
Two, does that mean you failedif you miss a day or you don't
get the result even though youfollowed it?
Like if it was like weight lossfor something, like, and you
lost like 9.8 pounds and youwant to lose 10, does that mean
you failed your goal?
Like, no, like it helps youstart setting goals that are
(32:15):
much more like meaningful to youand the journey that you're on,
the type of growth that youwant to see.
So, like I had a goal that Istarted almost six years ago.
Like, I wanted to show up formyself, I wanted to finish the
year strong, like I want to feellike physically strong, like
like I wasn't moving enough.
I wanted to like do a workout.
(32:37):
And so I had kind of likeplayed with it and like, okay,
no, December 1st, doing like 30days.
I'm gonna finish the yearstrong.
I wanted to have thatconfidence.
I thought that would be likegive me the confidence, like,
look, I can do this, I can showup for myself and all these
other ways.
And I did.
And then I'm like, well, let'sstart the year strong.
Like that feels like goodenergy.
(32:58):
And then, you know, kept going.
That's like, well, let's do 90days, like, let's see.
And then that was back at theend of 2019 into 2020.
And so I was still going strongwhen COVID hit.
And so suddenly that goal thatI had of showing up for myself
out of a place of strength, likeof physically showing up for
myself, became a goal of showingup for myself mentally, because
(33:21):
like, you know, we were soscared, and it was like there's
so much happening.
Like, I needed that safe spaceto like step away and like just
connect with nature and be like,our worlds are like so chaotic,
but look, nature is stillhappening, like there is still a
rhythm, there are still seasonsthat are happening, like
there's still some order in thislife.
(33:42):
So then that's what kept megoing because that's the goal.
Like the goal changed, eventhough I was still showing up
for a walk every day.
The intent of the goal of thataction changed.
And now almost six years later,I'm still doing that.
I'm still showing up for myselfin a walk every day.
And now it's just part of myrhythm of like my energy
(34:04):
actually needs that reset everyday to like step away and take a
breath.
And it's actually a space whereI get my like creative stuff
out because I get so many ideaswhen I'm walking and moving my
body that like it's actuallypart of my growth for my
business now.
Because like I can count onthat time to like I'll never be
(34:25):
stuck for ideas because I havethis space to talk it through
and or listen to a podcast thatgives me the next spark of
something.
So that's the kind of goalsetting.
Like, you want something thatcan actually support you through
whatever you need and have itbe flexible enough to go with
you, not be so specific andmeasurable.
(34:45):
Like I never fail.
If I showed up, I never failedmyself.
Like, and then being gentleenough to know, like, there's
gonna be some days where it'sreally hard to show up.
So I've also had to workthrough my relationship of like
perfectionism and you know, thatlike, oh my god, I can't fail
my goal like each day.
So I've also learned a lotabout myself on that front.
(35:07):
It's the goal that keepsteaching.
Stephanie Rose (35:10):
Yes, it is.
Yeah, you know what?
I find walks for me, like theyjust remind me, like where I am.
I live in Toronto and furtherout, like an hour from Toronto,
and like there's a lot of treesin the area where I am, which is
great because I find likenature is always very helpful
with that.
But when you talk about likeyou setting your goals and doing
(35:31):
the things and like the goalthat you did have a few years
back, for people who don'tjournal or they're not really
big on writing, what do you sayto them?
Like, how do you set the goalsthere?
Carlene (35:44):
I think that's you need to like if you're not
journaling now, like maybeexperiment with like, can you
write it out enough to help openthat connection?
Or um can you take yourself fora walk and just ask yourself
questions as you walk?
Because I also find like whenyou're moving your body, you're
(36:05):
like changing your mind, becauselike that energy is moving in
you, you're not so stuck, likewhen you're at a desk all day or
you're caught up in the energyof other people all day, like
it's really hard to like tune into you.
And so if you can step away andlike just like you know, get
your body moving.
And I've done it like where Ido voice notes to myself and I
(36:28):
ask myself a question and Ispeak it back out, and I'll
record myself just so in casesomething comes up that I'm
like, what did I say?
I can go back to often I don't,but it's like there are times I
just know that if I'm reallytrying to talk through a process
or something, like I will writeit or voice note it just so I
can have it.
(36:48):
And it's like any other way tolike open up that curiosity and
connection with yourself.
And to start, it does itprobably does need to look like
stepping away.
And if you it makes you feelenergized to like be like alone
together with people, likefinding someone like, hey, like
doing a journal together for afew minutes, or do you want to
(37:11):
or can I talk this out to you?
Like any way to really likefree yourself up to start
communicating with yourself in asafe space.
And so I find it easier to dowith myself because I don't want
to hear what other people haveto say.
I don't want to censor myselfsharing it with anyone else yet.
So yeah, I'd say walk, try towrite it out or yeah.
Stephanie Rose (37:35):
No, I think uh even voice notes, like you said,
like sending a voice memo toyourself, that's another way of
doing it too, and talking,asking yourself those questions,
which is so true, right?
So it's it's very interesting,the whole idea of journaling,
because I think for me, likeeven just writing down like the
things that you like to do whenyou were younger that you still
(37:56):
like to do now.
Like it's it's it's one ofthose things that reflecting
back on those things, that's howyou figure out, oh yeah, that's
what I like to do.
Or, you know, but getting backto the theme of the show, which
is this is 40, a femaleexperience, like a female
perspective in that sense.
So for the female listener, orjust I mean, you have a lot of
(38:19):
clients obviously that you help.
What is your advice for thenext six months of the year?
Because like we're gettingtowards the end, like half of
the year already.
And so, what advice do you giveto someone who wants to work on
like a goal?
Carlene (38:38):
I would say like start finding ways to tune in to your
intuition and like what it hasto tell you, and notice the
things that catch your attentionthat like give you that spark
of like energy that, like, oh,like maybe like out of nowhere
type thing to like, oh, like Iwas really energized talking to
(39:00):
that person.
That like that really lit meup, and then get curious, like,
well, is it what we talkedabout, who we talked about, like
where we were, like, yeah.
And just like that, that'swhere the list making can be
really helpful.
Like, just start collectingthose little glimmers.
Like, that's why Firefly Scoutis part of the name.
It's like those littlefireflies, like those little
(39:22):
things that make those littleglimmers in the night are what
make the dark not so scary.
It can transform the wholeexperience instead of feeling
like lost in the unknown.
Like, you're looking for thoseglimmers that suddenly make it
like a magical evening, likethat gives you like a sense of
peace and calm.
So I would say start noticingwhat your how your intuition
(39:43):
talks to you.
Mine feels more like cottoncandy wisps.
Stephanie Rose (39:47):
Like, yeah, yeah.
Carlene (39:49):
Like, oh, like it's not very specific, but it'll just
kind of be like, oh, that waslike a wisp of something.
Like, what was that?
And then I I know, like, I'mnever gonna get that definitive,
like, it was this.
I think that's like, oh, likeI'll start like getting like
little tastes of something, andthen so I'll just try to like
capture those down.
As a generator type, you'll getlike literal like gut checks,
(40:13):
like yes, like that feels like ayes in your body.
So just learn whatever yesfeels like to you.
And so my my yes feels like oh,like I feel that little twinkly
wisp going by for others.
It's like that literal gutcheck.
Other times it's that sense ofclarity that comes through, like
after you feel all the things,like just knowing like when you
(40:37):
feel most clear on that yes inyou, and then start writing it
down, just a simple list.
Um I call evidence, and so it'sjust the evidence of like what
that is, and then start to seelike, are those leading you
somewhere?
Are those drawing you toward anopportunity?
Is that telling you like whatyour heart really wants you to
(40:58):
do?
And you know, does that looklike learning something new to
expand your education so you cangrow in your career?
Is it helping you notice like arelationship that's not serving
you?
Is it time to like have yououtgrown something?
Like sometimes those signalsdon't always feel so good
because it it's actually timefor you to like expand and level
(41:20):
up, and using that to help setsome goals for you and like the
journey for like the next sixmonths.
Stephanie Rose (41:30):
Yeah, definitely.
This has been a veryinteresting conversation indeed.
I'm Carlene, and this is Divatonight with Stephanie Rose of
Firefly Scout.
Um, if you want to check herout on social media, she's on
Instagram, Firefly Scout.
(41:50):
I just followed you today.
And you can also check her outonline.
What's the website?
Carlene (41:56):
It's Firefly Scout.com.
Stephanie Rose (41:59):
And if you like the show, check it out at
divatonight.buzzsprout.com.
Send me a text.
We'd love to hear your opinionon the human design or anything
that we've talked about.
I think it's been aninteresting conversation about
journaling and the human designand just figuring out what your
(42:22):
little firefly is, you know, ina way.
So thank you so much,Stephanie, for taking the time
to share what you do and how yougot there.
It's been great.
Carlene (42:33):
Thank you, Carlene.
It's been a very fun journeywith you.
For sure, definitely.
Bruce Hayward (42:38):
Diva Tonight with Carlene will be back.
Send us a message on Instagramat Diva underscore tonight.
Hi, I'm Carlene and this is Diva.
Tonight I have with me on ZoomStephanie Rose, and she is the
creator of Firefly Scouts.
She has a very interestingbackground when it comes to
energy work.
She knows a bit about the humandesign and also journaling.
(00:27):
I'm gonna get to that because Ithink it's very important.
Because in this day and agewith technology, I find like
journaling is something thatmaybe not many people do so much
anymore.
I'm not saying I don't have anystats to back that up, but I
feel like we text more than wewrite, and vice versa.
(00:48):
And so, Firefly Scout, tell memore about that.
What brought on this endeavor?
Carlene (00:56):
Well, I'm excited to talk with you about all the
things.
Yay! Firefly Scout came to beas I was like a midlife mom,
like finally starting to getenough sleep and like went on my
own self-discovery journey oflike, who am I?
What do I want?
The old ways weren't quiteworking anymore.
But I didn't know where thatnext direction was, and having
(01:19):
like taken on this new identityof being a mom while working in
corporate, and you know, liketrying to live my life and like
those old parts of you that arestill like wanting to show up
too.
So I was trying to like figureall of that out.
And journaling is actually whatsparked all of that.
Um, I had done a program calledThe Artist's Way, which
(01:40):
promotes like stream ofconsciousness journaling, and I
had never done it that way.
I was always more of like adiary writer.
Like today I did this andlisting more like facts and
details versus getting and intoanything that was like feelings,
or if I did, I was very likecagey or sketchy about actually
(02:01):
like writing them down.
And so this like stream ofconsciousness journaling was
such a freeing way, like even ifwhatever I was putting on the
page was just whatever flowedout, it created space, mental,
emotional space for me to likeorganize some thoughts and tie
up some loose ends with things.
(02:22):
And then as I had more space,then I had like ideas that I
wanted to explore and just likewell, what if?
And then it started to feellike more creative and it became
like something I could reallycount on to like have the outlet
to just pour it out again.
Even if it wasn't like all likesuch profound things, it was
(02:42):
just a great way to like wordvomit everything out and just
even like I'm sitting here atthe counter and I don't know
what to write, and but today wasthis, and then just wherever it
flowed.
So through that, I I got enoughor my thoughts started to
organize enough, and like I wantto do something to really help
others with this.
Cause like I was realizing likeI'm not alone in this kind of
(03:06):
lost and stuck feeling.
And so then I started to pullit together into a business,
really getting in touch withwhat you feel.
And it's not even just likeyour feelings, but just like
noticing like the energy withinyou and like kind of like what
you sense and what what youneed, like those parts of you
need, so you can actuallyrespond to them and fulfill it.
(03:28):
So that's how it all came to beand really did evolve from
journaling.
Stephanie Rose (03:34):
So you said you left corporate America.
So what were you doing beforeyou started a Firefly Scout?
Carlene (03:43):
I was doing like program management, working with
um in a manufacturing settingto making sure that the dealers
were getting product andcompleting their projects on
time.
So it was there was a lot oflike relationships there and
communication and processes andyou know, following protocols
both within our corporate, withour clients' corporate, with the
(04:07):
dealers that each had their ownset of things.
So it was really like a lot ofballs in the air, and like
seeing that you know, somethingthat happened in one realm
actually had ripple effectssomewhere else, and trying to
keep all that in mind so thateveryone was like on board and
understood why some we weredoing something here that didn't
(04:30):
make sense to them.
Stephanie Rose (04:32):
So, how do you feel like that industry, like
being a project manager, helpedyou with your business now?
Carlene (04:40):
Managing chaos is really like just a life skill we
all need.
I just got paid for it in thatcapacity.
Um but just seeing like youhave so many like stakeholders
with different versions ofsuccess to them, like success
for the client means somethingdifferent than success to you as
the manufacturer, and somethingelse to like the installer or
(05:03):
the end user.
So, like understanding, likeI've always been really good at
seeing other people's points ofview and kind of mediating all
of that to help bridge the gapsthat people might have between
uh what's in what's important intheir world and what's
important in the other people'sworlds.
And so I'm kind of carryingthat into the business of like
(05:25):
doing that just for yourself andbeing able to handle all the
stakeholders of people in yourlife and really just give
yourself some perspective to seeit that way instead of being
caught in the swirl of all thethings, yeah.
Stephanie Rose (05:40):
Speaking of all the things, like we're all busy
working, trying to manageeverything.
Before we get into what youhelp your clients do and like
what you help other women do,this podcast is a series devoted
to women in their 40s.
And so with that being said, doyou feel like at this stage in
(06:03):
life, women who are 40 to 49,that it's kind of like a
crossroads where you're likefiguring your life out, but also
dealing with like possiblehealth concerns and doing the
things, right?
What do you think is moreimportant now than ever before?
Like in terms of setting goalsand changing careers if you have
(06:26):
to?
Like, I guess I'm asking morethan one question, but the main
question is with journaling, howdo you feel from how it would
help anyone now that'sstruggling with life and their
goals?
Carlene (06:42):
40s is like really prime for this type of confusion
because up until this point,you've probably been living up
to some sort of storyline thatyou've been following, like
education, career, family, youknow, becoming an adult,
stabilizing in that.
And then you the roadmap kindof ends in just like, oh, until
(07:05):
retirement.
Like there's this like big gap.
So you're like right at thebeginning of this gap until you
hit the this mysterious realm ofretirement.
And so this is the time whereyou might start to like kind of
look around and realize, like,is this even where I wanted to
end up?
Is this the trajectory I wantto stay on for the next 20
(07:26):
years?
And so it can be confusing toreally realize, like, oh, like
maybe I didn't have as muchagency in my life as I thought,
because subconsciously I wasfollowing this path that has
been kind of pushed on us, liketo go of what success looks
like.
And it's not bad, but you'reyou're just like, is this all
(07:49):
there is now?
Like you're kind of doing likeand then you realize like you
actually have the power to likechoose your next thing.
Like, are you gonna stay inthat job?
Are you gonna is there a dreamin your heart that like you've
been ignoring?
And there's maybe a little bitmore capacity to like uh start
listening.
And in this range, you'restarting to see like your
(08:11):
parents getting older and orjust witnessing more people like
maybe having some end of lifeuh regrets or wishes that like
because their time like theirend is very close.
So like where that horizon linehas felt just so far away in
your 40s, you're starting tonotice like there really is an
end point, and it startscreating that little bit of time
(08:33):
pressure on you because itdoesn't feel so infinite
anymore.
And that's where journaling canbe really helpful because when
we just stay in our head and theswirl of the thoughts and the
feelings, and we don't like getthem anchored out and like
really like we have feelings andthings that cannot have they
don't have the access to words,but we have to try.
(08:56):
And so when you pause longenough to journal and just let
things just flow out and don'tcensor what you're saying or
trying to like shape intocohesive thoughts that you know
are gonna be so meaningful toyou later, like taking that time
to pause, like one, we're notrewarded for rest.
The idea of saying, Well, Itook a mental break and wrote
(09:19):
out my feelings is not somethingwe like get celebrated for.
Right, right, yeah.
And then like just kind of likeanchoring some things, like
getting it onto the page thatthe mind-hand connection to like
physically write it out, likeit's an expression out of you.
Like your handwriting is anexpression of you.
(09:40):
And so, like you can look atyour handwriting and see like
kind of how you're feeling, likeit's a reflection of it.
Like if you're if it's reallytight and cramped, like that can
actually be assigned to you,like, oh, like I'm actually
feeling something maybedifferent than I thought
underneath because it's comingthrough and on literally on the
page.
And like like you censoryourself so much, but when you
(10:02):
can just free yourself from thatand just get it onto the page,
like you just start to buildthat sense of trust with what
your heart is really saying andthings that really need to come
out, and you're addressing likethat mental energy within you
and your emotional energy tolike help put some sense to what
(10:24):
you're doing, and that and youhave some evidence of like what
things keep coming up becauseyou wrote them down.
You can go back to them and belike, I've been saying this a
lot.
And it's one thing if you sayit to a friend or like they're
not as gonna call you out on it,or they may not notice you know
the pattern you keep saying,but when you write it down, that
(10:46):
gives you just more of aconcrete thing of like, I've
been saying this a lot lately,and then that can help you know
build some problem awarenessawareness of like where you need
to focus, like your energynext.
Stephanie Rose (11:01):
So for you, I remember reading on Firefly
Scout that you journaled for isit almost a year?
Like you were on this pathwhere you didn't take a break
from journaling.
It was kind of like uh, well,more or less the self-discovery.
Carlene (11:18):
Yeah, like the artist's way is like a 12-week program
that you can do, but then I wasgetting so much out of it, like
I kept going, like maybe not asregularly, but still just really
using that as a way to likekeep letting stuff out and like
refining it.
Stephanie Rose (11:36):
Just getting it out of the swirl of my head to
like a more grounded place.
And when you did that, what didyou discover about yourself?
Carlene (11:47):
It gave me a chance to really like honor, like, you
know, maybe what I'm missing inlife, like where I thought I'd
be right now, what I thoughtthis stage of life would feel
like, gave me space to like behonest about like what I do and
don't like about stuff,especially like career-wise,
(12:07):
with things of like theobligations that it puts on you,
and realizing like I didn't fitinto the role anymore.
So through that, as I keptgoing with it, when there was a
time for to like re kajiggerlike job responsibilities, I
used journaling and some listmaking to just really pick
(12:27):
apart, like what did I reallylove doing in life and in my job
and uh all the things withthat?
But so I can really like startto differentiate what did I
actually love to do, what was uhreally stressful for me to do?
What was like not a growth kindof friction, but just like a
tension that wasn't expanding meand really like explore those
(12:49):
nuances.
And because I had it writtendown, I like come back and
reference it and refer back toit, and then use that.
Like like I said, in my jobthen when we were kind of
rearranging responsibilities, Icould better articulate like
this is what I love doing, thisis what makes work and life feel
good for me.
(13:09):
And it worked out like by mesaying what I love to do, by all
the things I could say yes to,I actually didn't have to say
all the things that I didn'tlike doing because I was
inviting all these things, like,yes, this these are the things
I'm really great at doing.
I want to put part of myresponsibility.
And as a result, like I won'thave time for these things now,
(13:32):
but I didn't have to say likewhy to like because like a lot
of travel was tough doing umlike RFP deadline based things
that was like conducive to uhyoung motherhood.
Like I I didn't have thatavailability on tight time
frames.
Like didn't mean I couldn't dothe work, it just that type of
(13:53):
work wasn't aligned for me.
So like it just gave me so muchmore confidence to say, like,
no, this is what I really lovedoing, and this is what I don't,
without having to say I can'tdo that anymore.
Like, not letting thoserealities of other parts of my
life like hold me back.
So that was another way, liketaking the time to like write it
(14:14):
out and notice these things andbeing really curious about like
where your energy flowsnaturally makes it so much makes
life so much easier.
Stephanie Rose (14:25):
So when we think about like who you are now and
where the path took you, let'sgo from the beginning.
It's always interesting to hearhow people like how their
journey has gotten them.
Like it's I always say this,it's not where you're going,
it's where you came from.
(14:45):
And the journey to get thereobviously took you to where you
are now.
And this company you created tohelp women with their goals,
their ambitions, and just theprocess of figuring who you are
out.
So when you were younger, didyou like to write?
(15:06):
Was journaling a big thing foryou?
What were what interested youwhen you were a kid?
Carlene (15:11):
I did journal some.
Like I said, it was more oflike a diary entry.
Like, you know, I worked at amovie theater.
So, like who I worked with, howmany cotton candy bags I did
that day.
Like, like, yes, there weresome feelings in there, but it
was because I thought that's howyou were supposed to do it.
Stephanie Rose (15:29):
Like, yeah, like I remember, like, you know, you
watch these shows, like, andthe girl's always writing her
journal or her diary, deardiary, today, you know.
Like, if you watch, I rememberHarrier the Spy, where she
didn't write the typicaljournal, but she was a spy, so
she used that as a way.
But like all these other shows,like me too.
I used to write a diary becauseI was just like, that was the
(15:52):
one way I could release, likewrite out my feelings, you know,
at a as a young child.
Like I always wrote, and thenfrom journaling, I would write
poems, you know what I mean?
And so I remember writing thisone poem that won this little
contest in school or whatever.
I think it was like the newslab newspaper.
So writing has always been mything too, and it's helped me
(16:14):
remember because my short-termmemory is horrible.
Like, and you know, I know thatfor a fact when I get
introduced to people, I'm like,what's their name again?
But like getting back to thejournaling thing, obviously it's
a there's a little part of itthat was part of like your
growing up and working at themovie theater.
So, do you like movies?
Was that like a thing for youas well?
Carlene (16:35):
No, that was more it was a cool place to work.
And yeah, my parents said, ifyou want a car, you gotta get a
job.
So I went and got a job.
But I did like it because likeit had you weren't always on,
like, yes, you're dealing with alot of people, but in between
shows, it's quiet.
So, like that kind of rhythmactually works for me.
(16:58):
I didn't know it at the time,but like if you were doing
something in retail where likeyou're just dealing with
customers like all the time,like I don't think I could
handle that.
But knowing like there is thispattern, I could anticipate and
prepare for it, like, and it waslike okay, and you know, fun
people to work with too.
Stephanie Rose (17:16):
Yeah, it's interesting you say that because
I work in retail with lots ofpeople, and I think like after a
day of dealing with people, Ineed the downtime because it's
it takes a lot of energy to dealwith people, to answer
questions, to deal with likecoworkers' different moods and
like be on it all the time.
So yeah, it's definitely athing.
(17:36):
And for whoever's listening,it's very interesting because
Stephanie and I spoke prior andwe're both April babies.
And so I'm April 11th andyou're the 13th.
And I think it's veryinteresting how you know we
connected um the way we did.
And so, as part of that, Ithink it's interesting because I
(17:57):
didn't tell you, I didn't, Idon't know if I sent you my
human design report because wewere talking about that as well.
And I totally forgot to sendyou what it is, but I know I'm a
generator, and so I give offenergy.
People can sense it.
Like I've had so many peopletell me they're like, I can tell
you're a people person, or likethere's just something about
that.
Carlene (18:17):
So I don't know if you know what you are, if you're a
generator as well, or what yourhuman design is, but I'm
actually a splenic projector,and I only learned that a few
years ago, but I was always likeon the fringe of like, oh,
like, yeah, let me read myhoroscope type thing, like in
the magazine, but I never likecared about so much.
(18:39):
But um, a few years ago I wasintroduced to human design.
I'm like, oh, that'sinteresting, like, yeah, it
makes sense.
And I was busy doing otherthings, like getting the
business going.
And then I came back to thatreport and I was like, oh, like
there's a lot here.
And it gave me like more wordsto understand or things like
notice, like, oh, I nevernoticed that about my energy
(19:00):
before.
And so now in hindsight, I'mlike, well, of course that
worked for me or didn't work forme, because that's not how I
best operate to know myself.
So, like working at the movietheater, like because I could
like there were like the rhythmsthrough the time, like based on
(19:21):
when the shows were, that'swhen we would be busy or not
busy.
And I could like know thatit'll only be busy for like 30
minutes, and then it'll calmback down, and then we can do
more, like you know, thecleaning, the resetting and
stuff.
And that way, and when you'reat a movie theater, you're just
selling tickets, sellingconcessions, or like people
aren't coming at you with awhole bunch of different
(19:43):
requests, like you're doing likeone kind of narrow focused
thing, and like that worked wellfor me.
But if like fielding a lot oflike requests from all over the
place, like that can be moretaxing in some ways, so like
it's not as aligned for me.
Yeah, because like otherpeople's energy just it's too
(20:04):
much pinging off of me, so it'shaving a moment.
Like, there's so many thingsthat go beyond just like your
type with it, but yeah, uh yeah,like learning that flavor of
astrology was like, oh, becauseI was already invested in
knowing myself and figuringthese things out about myself,
(20:25):
but it just gives you like kindof like a map to start being
curious about, like with somenames.
Like, is this me?
Like, yes, and like with myastrology, I never really
resonated with my sun sign untilI heard like the right
interpretation of it.
I'm like, oh now I see, like,as an Aries, they always say
(20:47):
it's like leader and bold.
I'm like, that's not quite me.
But then I heard that it couldbe like a pioneering type
energy, like, and that resonatedmore because it's like, no, I
love exploring and figuring outnew things, and it's just
finding like the right words,just tying back into the
journaling.
You you find the right words toexplain what you sense or you
(21:12):
feel, and like everythingchanges for you.
Bruce Hayward (21:16):
Diva tonight, glamour for your ears.
This is 40, a femaleperspective.
Stephanie Rose (21:23):
You know, sometimes I feel like the
universe connects us with peoplethat will that we need or that
are gonna help you.
And I think even through thiscommunity pod match, I've met
some very, very smart people.
And like I'm sensing with youthat we have a lot in common.
We I mean, we did when we firsttalked, but the more you tell
(21:45):
me about the things that youlike and the things that you do,
like I spent like yourself alot of time reading.
Reading was my escape.
I read all the Anna GreenGables books.
I read like whenever the chaoswas happening in my in my
childhood, my escape was thelibrary, the quiet place.
(22:06):
Like it was like for me, Iloved it there.
I spent so many hours in thelibrary, and and now that I'm
older, I don't read as much.
I still have books and I I'mtrying to read more, but yeah,
it's it was it was a thing.
I I was obsessed with it to thepoint where my mom's friend was
like, Don't you think you mightgo a little crazy from all that
(22:26):
reading?
I'm like, no, I don't think so.
In my mind, I didn't think itwas.
I thought it was it was great,you know what I mean?
This is like another place,just like the movies, right?
Is another form of escape fromreality and like it gives you
that either that happy ending orthat message or something,
right?
Carlene (22:45):
Yeah, because storytelling relies on like
archetypes and the naturalexpression of them, and there is
a flow to a story that feelssatisfying to us.
Like we all you've maybe reador watched some things like, oh,
like that didn't follow theflow of like how a story is
supposed to go, and they mayhave done it intentionally to
(23:06):
like jar you into thinking, orit was just poor storytelling.
But I love reading and storiesbecause I think it gives you a
chance not even to escape, butmaybe even see something about
you in those and some plant someseeds of possibility, like
well, that character did this.
Like when they rent facedsomething that was challenging,
(23:29):
what did they do?
Stephanie Rose (23:31):
Right.
Carlene (23:31):
And it it maybe isn't even that conscious that you're
like aware you're monitoringthat, but I started doing that
with the books that I read,like, oh, like noticing like the
arc of the story, like, ohyeah, there's 50 pages left that
the crisis is gonna happen,they're gonna um the
misunderstanding is gonnahappen.
But using that in your ownlife, like to understand, like
you're gonna havemisunderstandings, you're gonna
(23:53):
have a crisis, you're gonna havesomething where everything
seems like it's falling apart.
And but how do they figure itout?
What did they do?
Did they just give up?
Be like, yes.
Yeah, like in that way, likethat love of story can really
help you like stay optimisticthat like there's a way through.
And if it's not that it has tobe a happily ever after, but if
(24:15):
there's not like a satisfyingepilogue to it, the story's not
over.
Stephanie Rose (24:19):
Yeah.
Well, you know, I always referto either music or movies.
So when you say the crisis, Ithink of the movie our brand is
crisis.
This is a good movie.
It's a sad movie.
I saw it at TIF years ago, butalluding to that, I think
though, you know, like you weresaying with the whole reading,
how it can help you figure outhow you are as a person.
(24:44):
And so is there a characterthat you find that you identify
with?
Carlene (24:49):
I've read a few books that like leave me with like a
book hangover of like, oh, likeeven if it's not like I see
myself so much as the character,but just like the journey that
they went through, you feel youget so attached to it that it
like kind of sticks with you.
Like you can't shake it off.
So I had one, it was byAnnabelle Monahan.
(25:11):
I don't remember which one itwas.
Stephanie Rose (25:13):
Okay.
Carlene (25:13):
Because I've read all her books, but all of hers are
good.
It'll come to me.
I wasn't prepared.
Stephanie Rose (25:20):
It's the name of the I know, I know.
I didn't tell you, I didn'ttell you the things.
I told you some things, but wewon't talk about books too much.
I just thought it wasinteresting that we both have
that in common and also the thewhole thing with being in Aries
and being like the leader, thecenter of attention, whereas
sometimes I don't want to belike you, the center of
(25:41):
attention.
I don't want to be.
I can be.
In many instances, I feel likeI can be, but then sometimes I'm
like, I just want to like hideand not, you know, be there.
But what I want to say is thatwith human design, I didn't
learn about it until my sisterbrought it up.
And she was like, Oh, did youever hear about the human
design?
I'm like, no, what is that?
(26:02):
And then so I looked into itand then I got my report and I
was like, wow, this is sointeresting.
This is like another part of methat I didn't know, like how
your energy could dictate likeeverything in your life.
You know what I mean?
Like the path that you're goingto, your career, uh, people
that you meet.
And so it's anotherself-discovery, I think, in a
(26:25):
way.
Like I think human design,you're the first person I've met
who has that on their resume assomething that they're familiar
with.
And you said you're stilllearning about it.
So I thought that was sointeresting because it's
different than, you know, likeyou said, astrology and the
things, right?
So what do you what do youthink is um important to know
(26:49):
about human design?
Carlene (26:50):
Like, I think it's important to like to approach it
with curiosity.
Okay.
You don't have to believe thatthe moment you were born
dictates your energy, like froma cosmic way.
Yeah.
Like if you can suspend thatpart of it, just be like, just
approach it with the interestand curiosity of like, does this
(27:12):
sound like me?
And if you pair it with yourown contemplation and your own
self-knowledge that you'rediscovering, it can be a really
powerful tool to help you likestart looking first at something
versus like having everythingthat you're curious about.
If you're like, well, what youknow, like what makes me feel
(27:33):
grounded?
What how am I meant to be likeradiant or shine?
What does following my purposelook like?
And if you ask or approach itfrom like the storytelling
standpoint of like what is thestory of this energy, see how it
resonates with you.
And if it doesn't, don't worryabout it.
But if you're feeling lost orstuck, like it is a great place
(27:58):
to start giving you some hooksand some words to start kind of
making your list of like, ohyeah, that sounds like me.
And I use the human designpaired with the glow map that I
came up with of like justunderstanding your energy inside
of you, like what you feel.
So, like how you your sense ofhow you feel physically,
(28:20):
emotionally, mentally.
What does your spiritual energyfeel like?
What's your connection energyfeel like?
And then you can get curious oflike, well, like what are the
rhythms that work well for me?
What are the creative outletsthat really like light me up,
that make me feel like the mostto me?
It's not meant to define you,it is meant to just help you
(28:44):
explore your curiosity aboutyourself with a little bit more
like focus.
Stephanie Rose (28:49):
Yeah.
No, I think I think it's true.
I read about it briefly, likeI've done some research on it,
but it's still an ongoingprocess, I think, for sure.
And I think like the wholething with journaling and you
know, journaling is so helpful.
Like, I think the more I do it,the more I understand it.
But I think they say it's moreof an internal thing.
(29:11):
So, what do you think aboutthat?
Like journaling and just beingcurious, because we talked about
two different thingsjournaling, journaling and the
human design, which is obviouslya way to understand who you
are, or just to be curious aboutother forms of, I guess it's
more of like a personality testor personality uh synopsis of
(29:33):
who you are and how you canfigure out what your gifts are,
or you know, just self discoveryin a way, right?
So, with journaling, how doesit help you with your goals and
setting goals?
And I think that's a lot, a lotof things, a lot of
conversations are happening withthat, like setting goals and
(29:54):
realizing where you want yourfuture to go, like in the next.
A month or three months, youknow.
Carlene (30:02):
Journaling is a great way to like bridge that
connection from your head toyour heart, that like like your
intuition, like what it reallywants you to know.
But the thoughts, fears,limitations, the stories that
your head is living by sometimesdon't let you.
But when you can like write itout on the page and like just
(30:24):
get things flowing and movingand they're not as sticky, then
like those truths can start tocome out.
And then you start noticingthose.
And then if you understand yourhuman design as like an added
layer of it, you can start toknow like what your intuition,
like how it speaks to you.
And it also helps you noticewhat you are and how other
(30:49):
people are.
Like other people havedifferent energy, they operate
in different ways.
So then maybe you don't takesomething as personally because
you actually understand howtheir energy works too.
And it's different than yours.
And so, like, that's whythere's frictions or tensions,
but it doesn't mean either ofyou are doing anything wrong.
(31:10):
It just means that like you'redifferent, and so that can open
you up to more empathy andunderstanding of other people
because you're not so caught upin your world, you're actually
connected into that space ofyou, and you can approach maybe
other people with moreunderstanding that they just
operate differently than you.
All of that can help you setgoals that are actually
(31:31):
meaningful to you in a way thatwill spell out success for you.
Like if you've created likesmart goals, specific,
measurable, attainable,realistic, and time-sensitive or
something.
Yeah.
Like those are great.
Like, that's very like rigidthinking, like, I will do this
for this, this, and I will getthis result.
(31:52):
Like, well, one, you don't knowif doing it that way is gonna
get you the result.
Two, does that mean you failedif you miss a day or you don't
get the result even though youfollowed it?
Like if it was like weight lossfor something, like, and you
lost like 9.8 pounds and youwant to lose 10, does that mean
you failed your goal?
Like, no, like it helps youstart setting goals that are
(32:15):
much more like meaningful to youand the journey that you're on,
the type of growth that youwant to see.
So, like I had a goal that Istarted almost six years ago.
Like, I wanted to show up formyself, I wanted to finish the
year strong, like I want to feellike physically strong, like
like I wasn't moving enough.
I wanted to like do a workout.
(32:37):
And so I had kind of likeplayed with it and like, okay,
no, December 1st, doing like 30days.
I'm gonna finish the yearstrong.
I wanted to have thatconfidence.
I thought that would be likegive me the confidence, like,
look, I can do this, I can showup for myself and all these
other ways.
And I did.
And then I'm like, well, let'sstart the year strong.
Like that feels like goodenergy.
(32:58):
And then, you know, kept going.
That's like, well, let's do 90days, like, let's see.
And then that was back at theend of 2019 into 2020.
And so I was still going strongwhen COVID hit.
And so suddenly that goal thatI had of showing up for myself
out of a place of strength, likeof physically showing up for
myself, became a goal of showingup for myself mentally, because
(33:21):
like, you know, we were soscared, and it was like there's
so much happening.
Like, I needed that safe spaceto like step away and like just
connect with nature and be like,our worlds are like so chaotic,
but look, nature is stillhappening, like there is still a
rhythm, there are still seasonsthat are happening, like
there's still some order in thislife.
(33:42):
So then that's what kept megoing because that's the goal.
Like the goal changed, eventhough I was still showing up
for a walk every day.
The intent of the goal of thataction changed.
And now almost six years later,I'm still doing that.
I'm still showing up for myselfin a walk every day.
And now it's just part of myrhythm of like my energy
(34:04):
actually needs that reset everyday to like step away and take a
breath.
And it's actually a space whereI get my like creative stuff
out because I get so many ideaswhen I'm walking and moving my
body that like it's actuallypart of my growth for my
business now.
Because like I can count onthat time to like I'll never be
(34:25):
stuck for ideas because I havethis space to talk it through
and or listen to a podcast thatgives me the next spark of
something.
So that's the kind of goalsetting.
Like, you want something thatcan actually support you through
whatever you need and have itbe flexible enough to go with
you, not be so specific andmeasurable.
(34:45):
Like I never fail.
If I showed up, I never failedmyself.
Like, and then being gentleenough to know, like, there's
gonna be some days where it'sreally hard to show up.
So I've also had to workthrough my relationship of like
perfectionism and you know, thatlike, oh my god, I can't fail
my goal like each day.
So I've also learned a lotabout myself on that front.
(35:07):
It's the goal that keepsteaching.
Stephanie Rose (35:10):
Yes, it is.
Yeah, you know what?
I find walks for me, like theyjust remind me, like where I am.
I live in Toronto and furtherout, like an hour from Toronto,
and like there's a lot of treesin the area where I am, which is
great because I find likenature is always very helpful
with that.
But when you talk about likeyou setting your goals and doing
(35:31):
the things and like the goalthat you did have a few years
back, for people who don'tjournal or they're not really
big on writing, what do you sayto them?
Like, how do you set the goalsthere?
Carlene (35:44):
I think that's you need to like if you're not
journaling now, like maybeexperiment with like, can you
write it out enough to help openthat connection?
Or um can you take yourself fora walk and just ask yourself
questions as you walk?
Because I also find like whenyou're moving your body, you're
(36:05):
like changing your mind, becauselike that energy is moving in
you, you're not so stuck, likewhen you're at a desk all day or
you're caught up in the energyof other people all day, like
it's really hard to like tune into you.
And so if you can step away andlike just like you know, get
your body moving.
And I've done it like where Ido voice notes to myself and I
(36:28):
ask myself a question and Ispeak it back out, and I'll
record myself just so in casesomething comes up that I'm
like, what did I say?
I can go back to often I don't,but it's like there are times I
just know that if I'm reallytrying to talk through a process
or something, like I will writeit or voice note it just so I
can have it.
(36:48):
And it's like any other way tolike open up that curiosity and
connection with yourself.
And to start, it does itprobably does need to look like
stepping away.
And if you it makes you feelenergized to like be like alone
together with people, likefinding someone like, hey, like
doing a journal together for afew minutes, or do you want to
(37:11):
or can I talk this out to you?
Like any way to really likefree yourself up to start
communicating with yourself in asafe space.
And so I find it easier to dowith myself because I don't want
to hear what other people haveto say.
I don't want to censor myselfsharing it with anyone else yet.
So yeah, I'd say walk, try towrite it out or yeah.
Stephanie Rose (37:35):
No, I think uh even voice notes, like you said,
like sending a voice memo toyourself, that's another way of
doing it too, and talking,asking yourself those questions,
which is so true, right?
So it's it's very interesting,the whole idea of journaling,
because I think for me, likeeven just writing down like the
things that you like to do whenyou were younger that you still
(37:56):
like to do now.
Like it's it's it's one ofthose things that reflecting
back on those things, that's howyou figure out, oh yeah, that's
what I like to do.
Or, you know, but getting backto the theme of the show, which
is this is 40, a femaleexperience, like a female
perspective in that sense.
So for the female listener, orjust I mean, you have a lot of
(38:19):
clients obviously that you help.
What is your advice for thenext six months of the year?
Because like we're gettingtowards the end, like half of
the year already.
And so, what advice do you giveto someone who wants to work on
like a goal?
Carlene (38:38):
I would say like start finding ways to tune in to your
intuition and like what it hasto tell you, and notice the
things that catch your attentionthat like give you that spark
of like energy that, like, oh,like maybe like out of nowhere
type thing to like, oh, like Iwas really energized talking to
(39:00):
that person.
That like that really lit meup, and then get curious, like,
well, is it what we talkedabout, who we talked about, like
where we were, like, yeah.
And just like that, that'swhere the list making can be
really helpful.
Like, just start collectingthose little glimmers.
Like, that's why Firefly Scoutis part of the name.
It's like those littlefireflies, like those little
(39:22):
things that make those littleglimmers in the night are what
make the dark not so scary.
It can transform the wholeexperience instead of feeling
like lost in the unknown.
Like, you're looking for thoseglimmers that suddenly make it
like a magical evening, likethat gives you like a sense of
peace and calm.
So I would say start noticingwhat your how your intuition
(39:43):
talks to you.
Mine feels more like cottoncandy wisps.
Stephanie Rose (39:47):
Like, yeah, yeah.
Carlene (39:49):
Like, oh, like it's not very specific, but it'll just
kind of be like, oh, that waslike a wisp of something.
Like, what was that?
And then I I know, like, I'mnever gonna get that definitive,
like, it was this.
I think that's like, oh, likeI'll start like getting like
little tastes of something, andthen so I'll just try to like
capture those down.
As a generator type, you'll getlike literal like gut checks,
(40:13):
like yes, like that feels like ayes in your body.
So just learn whatever yesfeels like to you.
And so my my yes feels like oh,like I feel that little twinkly
wisp going by for others.
It's like that literal gutcheck.
Other times it's that sense ofclarity that comes through, like
after you feel all the things,like just knowing like when you
(40:37):
feel most clear on that yes inyou, and then start writing it
down, just a simple list.
Um I call evidence, and so it'sjust the evidence of like what
that is, and then start to seelike, are those leading you
somewhere?
Are those drawing you toward anopportunity?
Is that telling you like whatyour heart really wants you to
(40:58):
do?
And you know, does that looklike learning something new to
expand your education so you cangrow in your career?
Is it helping you notice like arelationship that's not serving
you?
Is it time to like have yououtgrown something?
Like sometimes those signalsdon't always feel so good
because it it's actually timefor you to like expand and level
(41:20):
up, and using that to help setsome goals for you and like the
journey for like the next sixmonths.
Stephanie Rose (41:30):
Yeah, definitely.
This has been a veryinteresting conversation indeed.
I'm Carlene, and this is Divatonight with Stephanie Rose of
Firefly Scout.
Um, if you want to check herout on social media, she's on
Instagram, Firefly Scout.
(41:50):
I just followed you today.
And you can also check her outonline.
What's the website?
Carlene (41:56):
It's Firefly Scout.com.
Stephanie Rose (41:59):
And if you like the show, check it out at
divatonight.buzzsprout.com.
Send me a text.
We'd love to hear your opinionon the human design or anything
that we've talked about.
I think it's been aninteresting conversation about
journaling and the human designand just figuring out what your
(42:22):
little firefly is, you know, ina way.
So thank you so much,Stephanie, for taking the time
to share what you do and how yougot there.
It's been great.
Carlene (42:33):
Thank you, Carlene.
It's been a very fun journeywith you.
For sure, definitely.
Bruce Hayward (42:38):
Diva Tonight with Carlene will be back.
Send us a message on Instagramat Diva underscore tonight.
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Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang
Ding dong! Join your culture consultants, Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang, on an unforgettable journey into the beating heart of CULTURE. Alongside sizzling special guests, they GET INTO the hottest pop-culture moments of the day and the formative cultural experiences that turned them into Culturistas. Produced by the Big Money Players Network and iHeartRadio.
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.