December 4, 2025 • 39 mins
Feeling stuck between “kids these days” and “OK boomer”? We take a fresh, practical look at how each decade reshapes confidence, learning, health, and contribution—and how those shifts can knit stronger communities at home, at work, and in our cities. Drawing on a five-generation panel we hosted at Blake Street House, we unpack the habits that help you thrive in your 20s, the focus you need in your 30s, the mentoring power of your 40s, the relevance challenge of your 50s, and the surprising peak of impact many people reach between 60 and 80.
We trade caricatures for concrete moves. You’ll hear candid stories about early career missteps and bias, the simple scripts that help younger pros earn trust, and the choice mid-career professionals face between people leadership and deep expertise. We also go beyond the office: why movement matters for different reasons each decade, how to adapt when bodies change, and how curiosity keeps the mind young. Our research lens adds depth—from blue zone insights on longevity to evidence that isolation speeds cognitive decline while intergenerational connection protects it.
Community is the throughline. We highlight intergenerational housing models, the civic upside of mixed-age neighborhoods, and practical ways to lift others while extending your own healthspan and purpose. Legacy is not a late-life scrapbook; it’s the compounding effect of optimism, learning, and service carried forward year after year. We close with a seasonal challenge to reach across ages during the holidays and beyond—because belonging isn’t found, it’s built.
If this resonates, tap follow, share the episode with a friend, and leave a quick review. Tell us: what decade are you in, and what’s the one habit you’ll double down on this week?
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_00 (00:00):
As you approach 30, I think that most of us want to
try everything that we can try.
And as a result, we have to kindof believe that we can do it.
So we think we're good at a lotof things.
And we have confidence in a lotof things to try.
Now it's entirely possible we wedon't have confidence when we're
(00:22):
trying, but we're beingencouraged by someone to do it.
And so what we're doing isreally trying on a lot of
different hats.
And so sometimes that can comeacross as hey, you you know it
all, or you think that you knowit all.
Welcome to the four barspodcast.
I'm Ken Leith.
And I'm Patty Leith.
We are your host for somecompelling dialogue, encouraging
(00:43):
our listeners to strengthentheir connections and build
strong communities, lifting eachother up and connecting in ways
that matter.
We named the podcast Four Barsas a reference to how hard we
work to find a four barsconnection on our devices.
SPEAKER_01 (00:57):
And we wondered what could happen with relationships
if we worked as hard atconnecting.
Let's find out.
SPEAKER_00 (01:03):
Welcome back to Four Bars Podcast.
I'm one of your hosts, KenLeith.
And I'm Patty Leith, yourco-host.
We're excited to be back againtoday.
We're going to kind of wrap upour series on generations.
Ken, wasn't it a great, greatexperience to do the panel?
SPEAKER_01 (01:20):
Uh yes, it was.
Um, for everyone here who's hada chance to see it, we hope
you've really enjoyed it andgotten something.
It was was an incredibleexperience with having five
generations represented.
SPEAKER_00 (01:32):
Yeah, everyone's the storytelling was so amazing.
Like it was, you know, every nowand then you get this experience
where you're in something reallyspecial and you just feel so
blessed to be there.
That's kind of how I felt aboutthat that experience and and and
frankly the conversationsleading up to it.
SPEAKER_01 (01:52):
It um from my personal perspective, I think
Ian, you can share yours, but itreally for me, there were just
multiple surreal moments andthings that I expected that were
really expanded upon withrespect to, oh yes, um, I was
like this.
And then someone else from adifferent generation says, well,
we we do that sometimes too.
(02:12):
Yeah.
And the commonalities and thenfinding out where we were
different sometimes, what wasdriving that?
Uh was that a technologydifference?
Was that just life eventsdifferences?
What's uh what it could havebeen for each of those folks?
But they had those moments whereyou just really said, you can't
script that.
And they were incredible, all ofthem.
SPEAKER_00 (02:35):
And if you're listening or watching for the
first time and you have no ideawhat we're talking about, um, we
had a distinct opportunity to doa panel of people spanning five
generations at Blake StreetHouse in Bentonville.
Ken and I facilitated it.
We had some of the bestpanelists tell their stories
about what it's like to beinside of their generation.
(02:57):
Uh our youngest panelist was 24,our oldest panelist was 82.
Um, and uh we had an opportunityto hear their stories and really
see the differences, but as Kensaid, the commonalities.
The coolest part was that wetaped it for the podcast.
So if you uh subscribe to FourBars or go to Far
(03:19):
FourBarsPodcast.com, you'll findthose episodes.
They are the last three episodesto have dropped.
And today will be just somecommentary about the topic on to
sort of wrap up this concept ofbuilding community across
generations.
And Ken and I are superpassionate about that.
SPEAKER_01 (03:36):
Yeah, and I the last thing I'll share on that is for
me is I was struck by the factthat it was the transparency and
the vulnerability that peopleshared.
Um and I'll stress to everyonewhether you've seen it or not,
these folks did not know eachother uh prior to maybe one
short 15-minute meeting uhbefore we had sat down and did
(03:57):
the podcast with them.
But what they shared was sodifferent to expose their
feelings, their thoughts, theirfears on some of the challenges
they may experience, whether youare uh, you know, a Gen Z or a
traditionalist.
They all have some challengesbased upon their age, and
sometimes these judgments thatcan creep in based upon, well,
(04:20):
this person might be older oryounger.
They either may not know enough,or maybe they're looked at as
they're not as relevant anymore.
But the fact is they all hadsomething incredibly positive
and meaningful to share.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (04:34):
So Edges, our company, has been doing work
with our client organizationsfor many years in the area of
helping generations communicatebetter together.
Um, so we've done a lot of thatwork, and over the years we've
learned a lot about generationaldifferences.
And the the podcast part one,part two, and part three of that
(04:58):
panel experience really get atthe the different life
experiences that that people hadwho are who are in the category
called Gen X, Gen Z, millennial,traditional, baby boomer, um,
not in that order, but but justthe things that were going on in
(05:20):
their lives from a current eventstandpoint, the challenges that
they and their families had toum confront when they were
children, the um the technologyaccess, all of these things are
going to lead to thesegenerational differences.
But one of the things that wefound through our work is that
there are some things that aregoing to lead to these
(05:42):
generational differences thathave nothing to do with culture
or current events or lifeexperience.
It just has to do with the factthat, hey, I'm in my 50s and
you're in your 20s.
Ooh, you're a youngwhippersnapper, right?
People have been saying thatsince my dad was in his 40s.
Um rest his soul, he would be,he would be over 100 today.
(06:02):
So I I think that that that'sthat is something that we are
also really passionate about isuh helping people understand how
can I embrace these differentgenerations, not because they're
so different from me, butbecause they're just like I was
when I was that age.
So we've done a fair amount ofanecdotal research um in a
(06:25):
project we call My Mother HatesMy Music.
Um and I think that speaks foritself as to why we call it, I
think for for all of time, momshave been telling kids to turn
that down, um, it because thatis just sort of the the the life
stage that we're in.
SPEAKER_01 (06:42):
It yes, and it's been going on probably since the
dawn of time.
Yeah uh with respect to that.
And for example, we've over theyears with our our business,
we've had C-level folks talk tous about well, this group, for
example, millennials, well, theywant to work on their own terms,
they don't work as hard.
Um, those were fallacies, numberone.
(07:02):
They were just needing to bemotivated and different.
And every generation needs tohave some different motivations
with respect to things.
The other thing about uh some ofthe times when we have these
conversations with uh businessleaders, it's well, they have
these things where it's like, Idon't know how to connect with
them.
And our conversation with themis is to be able to help them
show how to connect with them,but just as importantly why it's
(07:25):
important to connect with them,as we would s share with them
years ago with some of them.
Well, those are your nextgeneration of leaders, and if
you do not connect with them,you're going to have a hard time
maintaining your workforce,getting the top of the top of no
matter what their age is, andthen ensuring that you have
continuity within yourorganization.
(07:46):
But if you do embrace them, whathappens is what we've seen
happen for many companies thatwe've been working with for
years.
Those people who are enteringtheir workforce then are now in
some of their leadership roles.
And they needed that to makethat and for the next however
many years businesses arearound, which will be forever,
you need to be sure that youconnect with those generations
(08:09):
instead of complaining.
We need to embrace them andfigure out and then bring them
in to what is we have toaccomplish.
SPEAKER_00 (08:14):
It has been going on since for ages.
And and and as you said that,I'm I'm wondering, you know,
what did that look like in inthe in the times of more
primitive living?
Um, you know, did kids annoytheir parents?
I I believe it's entirelypossible that they did.
SPEAKER_01 (08:32):
Uh yeah, likely.
I'm sure that along the way mymy parents may have said at
times, I may have been a littlebit annoying.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (08:40):
I remember being told by a minister when I was
probably 13 and I wascomplaining about how stupid my
parents were.
Um, he he assured me that theywould get smarter by the time I
hit 25.
Yeah.
It doesn't necessarily work thatway, but okay.
So one of the things that wewant to do, because we do
utilize our research a lot whenwe're coaching, we want to share
(09:02):
some thoughts with you aboutways that you can develop in a
in a you know towards towardspositivity based on where you
are in the stages of your life.
Like what does healthydevelopment look like?
And what happens if we get stuckin a particular stage and we
don't work through it?
(09:23):
Absolutely.
So I think it really is justembracing the people of a
different age are different formany reasons, but one of the
reasons is because they're adifferent age.
And it's entirely possible thatI was very similar at that age.
So let's take a look at we'restarting um in the workplace
(09:45):
age.
Um, so late teens, early 20s,um, as you approach 30, I think
that um most of us want to tryeverything that we can try.
And as a result, we have to kindof believe that we can do it.
So we think we're good at a lotof things, um, and we have
(10:07):
confidence in a lot of things totry.
Now it's entirely possible we wedon't have confidence when we're
trying, but we're beingencouraged by someone to do it.
And so so what we're doing isreally trying on a lot of
different hats.
Um, and and so sometimes thatcan come across as hey, you you
know it all, or you think thatyou know it all.
(10:28):
Um, but but in fact, in order toreally figure out what we want
to do, we do have to try a lotof things.
I I think it's helpful if whenyou're interacting with people
around you that you share thatyou're trying a lot of different
things, and if there's anyvulnerability in your confidence
level, you can share that too.
But Ken, think about yourself inyour 20s.
(10:48):
Who are you?
SPEAKER_01 (10:50):
Well, I'll share what I can on that one.
Um, no, in my 20s.
SPEAKER_00 (10:54):
I've been told I wouldn't marry you if I knew you
then, so there's that.
SPEAKER_01 (10:58):
Yes.
Uh many have told you that Ibelieve.
Many have told me that.
Um, I think that for me in my20s, especially it was just, you
know, I think my early 20s, andthen I segment my 20s a little
bit there.
You know, there's a time whereyou're just in school and
working, you're coming out ofschool.
Um, and um for me also, youknow, I I had a daughter at a
(11:20):
young age in my 20s with respectto that.
And, you know, that was a greatexperience.
But what it did for me, I thinkmy life was a little bit
different from some othersbecause you know, you get out of
school and then you you know youget married and then you're
having a child.
It's like, oh, you have to growup a little bit quicker
sometimes there too.
Because now you're responsiblefor a human being.
Yes, yes, and but still at thesame time in the job market, for
(11:42):
example, um I found myselfsometimes trying to overdo, and
that led to some mistakes,honestly.
Yeah, yeah, so with respect tothat, where I was trying to
exceed expectations for others,but also with the um mindset
that I wanted to jump ahead andI wanted to be able to show that
(12:04):
I could jump ahead, and thensometimes I had to really learn
to sit back and learn more andnot take it as they were talking
to me um in a way that wascondescending or anything,
because it wasn't most of thetime.
It was really it was just aboutsharing with me.
Um, one thing I will share withanyone who's doing, you know,
(12:24):
even when I was after I gotmarried, so as a young person, I
looked a lot younger for my ageat that time.
I also had long hair.
Well, I can tell you there werepeople back then who would
literally look at me and say,Well, how could you be doing X
job?
I'll I'll never forget my firstmanagerial job, and I was like
off proud of that.
(12:45):
And I go out to see a customerand I knock on a door, and it
was in a job where I was leadingthe customer experience, and
there were some concerns there.
So the customer wanted to speakto someone beyond my team.
And I was still relatively newin the job, and the gentleman
opens the door, and he says, Whoare you?
And I explain here, my name'sKen Leith, and I'm here to see
(13:07):
you.
Uh now you here you have aconcern, so I'd like to review
that with you and see if I canassist you.
And he looks at me and he goes,Well, if you're gonna be able to
help me, and I'll never forgetthis, then I could be CEO of
your company, I guess.
To which as I think back about,I'm sure my face didn't say it
at first.
SPEAKER_00 (13:25):
That was um, my mother hates my music.
Yeah, you you look too young toknow what you're doing, and
therefore you cannot do it.
Absolutely.
This is one of the reasons thatin our 20s we have to believe
that we can.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (13:38):
Because so many people don't.
So I had to think on my feetthere a little bit and and
really quickly come around thefact that, well, sir, my company
is assured that I am ready and Iam powered enough to be able to
assist you and whatever that maybe.
And if there's something I can'tdo for you, I can reach back out
to my company and to my boss.
(13:58):
Yeah.
So after that, he kind of said,okay, let's go in and talk and
stuff.
But it was just that very firstexperience.
And I and I had several of them,as you might expect during that
time.
Um, so not to be um surprised.
It wasn't probably too muchlonger after that.
I cut my hair.
Uh not because of that, but Ireally thought, okay, if I'm
gonna have some barriers put upjust because of that, I don't
(14:20):
want them to hold me back.
SPEAKER_00 (14:21):
Well, I think confidence is is critical in
your 20s.
And if it doesn't comenaturally, surround yourself
with people who help you buildthat up.
I think um discipline is is alsoreally important to have from a
healthy development standpoint.
If I if I think back on my 20plus year old self, I'm I was
(14:42):
pretty scrappy.
And and I I think that believingthat you can is really, really
important, not only in your 20s,and and frankly, I'm gonna I'm
gonna throw out the thought thatwe should all be feeling that
way about life.
But there is an optimism whenyou're just starting out in your
career or in your adult lifethat is tempered with a bit of
(15:05):
humor about how adulting isn'treally all it's cracked up to
be.
But it is an optimism that ishealthy to carry into future
stages of life.
SPEAKER_01 (15:14):
I I agree.
And uh you know this about me,and probably anyone who knows me
well, even today, knows that Igenerally am a very confident
individual that I can figurethings out, I can work through
them one way or another, and Idon't necessarily always, I'm
not always capable of doing itmyself.
I sometimes do need to reach outfor help.
That was one of my biggestchallenges when I was younger.
(15:36):
Okay.
Just not reaching out.
SPEAKER_00 (15:37):
Really asking for help.
And that sort of leads us to the30s.
I think by the time we hit our30s, we have figured out what
we're gonna do in life, whetherthat's professionally or
personally or some combinationof the two.
Um, and by the time we arehitting our 30s, we're really,
we're really kind of settling into something that we have found
out we're good at, we'repassionate about, hopefully.
(16:01):
And um and if not, it it you canprobably keep looking.
Um, but we're also, if it's acareer, we're also looking at uh
a path to income when we're inour 30s.
But one of the things that webegin to see in our 30s is
there's a story, and for many ofus, it's a bit of a harder story
that we have to work through inorder to set down the things
(16:26):
that are barriers for us andreally excel.
Um, so I always say that the30s, if if healthy development
is happening, they are a time ofpersonal exploration about your
story, about your wiring, aboutthe key things that make you who
you are, and um and the thingsthat are getting in the way that
might have an origin that ismore negative.
(16:47):
Your story doesn't define yourfuture, um, but it does create
your strength.
SPEAKER_01 (16:53):
So in our 30s, one of the things that occurs is
that if after we go through our20s, we've tasted a little bit
of different things.
Maybe we have tried differentroles within the same company,
maybe we've shifted companiestrying to go to something else.
What it does is it allows us tostart to formulate what are the
things that I do day to day thatI enjoy doing and what are the
(17:16):
things that I'm good at.
SPEAKER_00 (17:17):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (17:18):
And then the next thing is how do I get to do them
all the time or in a manner thatmakes me happy and fulfilling.
SPEAKER_00 (17:27):
Yeah.
And these are good choices.
Now I always say if you haven't,if you're in your 40s or 50s and
you haven't made those choicesyet, it's never too late.
Um, but but in your 30s, really,it is a time where you can begin
to dial in on on these thingsthat really are gonna give you
motivation and drive, therefore,continue your optimism.
(17:48):
Absolutely.
SPEAKER_01 (17:49):
It's a good it's a good place to be where we start
to really hone in on things thatwill set us up for the rest of
our lives, so to speak, and getus into positions where we can
really say, this is where I'mgoing to be, this is what I'm
going to do, and settle intothat and grow those strengths.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (18:08):
I think um then as we move into our 40s, and again,
it doesn't happen on your 40thbirthday.
I remember on my 40th birthday,I had a party.
Um, it doesn't happen on your40th birthday.
Um it it uh we we sort of beginto settle into what we're doing,
and we get deeper and moreinvolved in that.
(18:30):
If it's professional, we mightmove into a position of
leadership or into aspecialization.
Um, if it's personal, we mightget more involved in community
and civic organizations that ourkids are a part of, and maybe
it's both, but but really in our40s, we begin to see what our
potential can really be.
We start to see that, hey, 40snot really old.
(18:53):
It is it is a launch point intoa future that's more amazing
than I could really realize.
That's why that optimism, um,and but sometimes it's hard to
see that.
And um and and in our 40s, manytimes we have an opportunity and
we should take advantage of.
We have an opportunity to mentorothers, um, whether that's
(19:14):
professionally or or umpersonally, uh, oftentimes that
is where um younger people than40 often see 40, the the
experience that a 40-year-oldbrings to the table as something
that can help them.
A, great mentality for thatyounger person, but B, in your
40s, you should be seeking outways to help lift up others.
(19:37):
Oh, yeah.
Um, from a great, you know, ifif I'm gonna develop myself in
really healthy ways throughoutthe decades.
SPEAKER_01 (19:44):
Yeah.
I kind of laugh now because Ithink back into my twenties and
I used to see people who are40s, and I was like, wow,
they've been around a long time.
They're kind they're kind ofgetting up there now.
And then I laugh about that.
SPEAKER_00 (19:58):
Now I laugh about that too.
But my mother hates my music.
It's really about helping usidentify the things that are
common because of how old weare, not because of the current
events around us, but because ofhow old we are.
You know, to your point, when Iwas in my 20s, I thought
40-year-olds were, wow, that'sreally getting up there.
Um, in and and it's not, right?
(20:20):
It's only just getting started.
SPEAKER_01 (20:22):
Yes.
SPEAKER_00 (20:22):
Um, the other thing about if you're in your 40s,
you're probably watching us andgoing, yeah, you know nothing.
But I'm telling you, it reallyis.
We're a little older than that.
It's it's just getting startedon awesome.
You're just getting started onawesome.
SPEAKER_01 (20:34):
Yeah, and we could talk about a topic at a
different time, but it's as muchmental as it is physical when it
comes to how we age.
Yeah.
It's not just our chronologicalage.
So as we kind of look at peopleand say, wow, they're they are
living this lifestyle or they'redoing great.
Yeah.
As a sidebar.
Yeah, we recently met a coupleof gentlemen who were in their
(20:55):
80s who are both very vibrant.
Um, you know, you talk aboutskiing, mountain biking, still
teaching and mentoring.
Uh, it's incredible.
So society does have a place foreveryone.
I'll just sidebar that and comeback to the 40s here.
SPEAKER_00 (21:08):
Physical activity is one we should devote a whole
episode to because you've got agreat story there.
But physical activity is soincredibly important.
But in our 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s,60s, we do it for different
reasons.
Um many of my friends know thatI was a pretty serious runner
for many years.
Um, I'm not now due to some kneeproblems, but but in my 20s, I
(21:31):
ran to compete.
I I soaked in every single eventI could get and met as many
people that I could in thespace, and I ran to compete.
And then in my 30s, I ran to eatbecause my metabolism was
slowing down.
And in my 40s, I ran for stressmanagement.
Um, and then when I hit my 50s,I realized that running is so
(21:51):
that I can keep moving.
SPEAKER_01 (21:52):
Yes.
SPEAKER_00 (21:53):
Right.
And I think that movement is isprogressively important the
older you get, and yet it'ssomething that the young tend to
seek out and then drop.
So physical activity is a bigpart of healthy development, no
matter what age you are.
SPEAKER_01 (22:07):
So the interesting thing about that is it's not
something new to the body ifyou've done it your whole life.
It's just a lifestyle.
Yeah, it is at that point intime.
But I will say for folks whowill hit on the 40s here one
last time from my perspective,is if you're in your mid-30s at
that time, you're generallyyou've either getting your
you've either had your firstopportunity to supervise or
(22:28):
manage and get a taste of that,what that's like.
And as you get into your 40s,maybe it's a little bit later,
you may still be doing that samething.
But generally by your mid-40s, adecision is made, either by you
or by the organization you maybe in, which is I want to lead
people, manage people, I enjoythat as part of what I do, or I
(22:49):
don't.
And it's not for everyone, andthat's okay.
SPEAKER_00 (22:52):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (22:52):
Um, because you can be exceptional at your job,
enjoy your job and love it, butnot have to, you could be an
individual contributor.
SPEAKER_00 (23:00):
And if you're watching or listening and you're
about to turn 40, or yourecently turned 40, I'm gonna
share a story.
I was horrified when I turned40.
Um, little did I know um that itthat it was just the beginning.
But um, but but I went to myneighbor's house and she was a
little older than me.
She was the mother of theteenage girl who babysat for my
(23:21):
son at the time.
And uh she said to me, The goodnews is you're only 40 for a
year, and then it gets so muchbetter.
It's like, oh yeah, so once youcan say the word, it's easier to
embrace it.
Um perspectives.
Yeah, perspectives.
I think that um healthydevelopment as you get into your
50s is that we are now becomingexperts at something.
(23:45):
Um, and and and we maintainrelevance by pursuing ongoing
learning.
U our research has shown that inour 50s, and it doesn't again
just happen on the birthday ofthe decade, but in our 50s, um,
we have a choice.
We can continue to learn andseek relevance and be all that
(24:07):
we can be, or we can settle intothe memories of what we've done.
Um, and frankly, that doesn'tage well if you choose that
second one.
That's really how grumpy olderpeople mentality is born.
Um, staying relevant, pursuinglearning, um, and looking more
to the future, being again thatoptimism that we have in our
(24:27):
20s, if we can just pull that,nourish it into each decade, we
we develop so much better as wemake it through the stages of
our life.
But um when we can do this, westart to make a bigger impact.
And um, and I love coachingpeople who are there because it
(24:47):
is so helpful to really explorehow you can what can you seek to
stay relevant?
How can you not retire in placeor not you know relive the
homecoming game from college oror high school?
SPEAKER_01 (25:02):
Yes.
SPEAKER_00 (25:03):
Not only listen to music that you knew that you
heard when you were 20.
SPEAKER_01 (25:07):
For all the Springsteen fans out there, they
they do remember the song GloryDays.
SPEAKER_00 (25:11):
Yes, indeed.
SPEAKER_01 (25:12):
Um we should only hold on to it for so long.
But I will say too, in the 50s,that's let me back up here.
Basically every and there'splenty written on this from re
reliable sources such as Harvarduh business uh medical or
Cleveland Clinic.
And within that, every 10 years,we're our body's continuing to
(25:33):
move, and so is our brain.
And there's you know, studyafter study about okay, and it
also depends upon do we have anychronic illnesses at any age
that impact that?
Yeah.
Or are we continuing to learn?
Are we moving?
Are we sedentary?
What is it?
But the same thing from abusiness standpoint and how we
live and a personal standpointis are we still seeking to
(25:54):
learn?
Are we still seeking to try newthings?
And we've seen within some folksin their 50s, sometimes they've
truly embraced that and theykeep moving.
And sometimes it is literally,you know, I I think this is
comfortable.
I'm just going to stay righthere a little bit.
And that's where it's a pivotpoint.
(26:17):
And we see people who are evenolder than that now that we talk
to who can even talk about yeah,maybe I should have done things
a little bit different thenbecause I stopped doing some of
the things I learned I loved.
I stopped doing some of thethings that have now impacted
me.
So one of the things I wouldshare with anyone viewing or
listening is simply to if youthink as you grow and you're
(26:38):
growing, you're getting older,you don't have to stop anything
at a certain age unless yourbody says you can't do a certain
thing, for example.
But then you can even adapt.
And your mind, you can keep itgoing because we find that
people who pivot and kind of gosedentary and slow down and stop
looking forward and look backand enjoy that, they tend to
(27:00):
have some more challenges thanthose who don't.
SPEAKER_00 (27:02):
Yeah.
And I I had as as you know, hadto stop running in my 50s, but I
then pivoted that to hiking andcycling and and and still kept
kept going.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Adaptation.
Yeah.
And that's often oftenimportant.
I think in your 50s, the theimportant mindset again is
learning, seeking new, you know,optimism.
(27:29):
Optimism.
Uh to to really be believingthat um it's not over.
There's still a lot, a lot todo.
SPEAKER_01 (27:37):
And I'll go back to the panel discussion we held.
I learned in that discussionfrom people at every age within
those five generations.
Yeah.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (27:48):
So as people move into their 60s, one of the
things that's really interestingis that there are a large number
of studies that show that themajority of people make the
greatest impact in their livesbetween the ages of 60 and 80.
So if you think about being agrandparent, which often starts
(28:10):
in this era, um, maybe a littleyounger, uh, it's it's impop
it's entirely possible it startsin the 40s or 50s.
But when you think about that,that is making an impact on the
next generation.
But I also think that um thatreally embracing yourself with
the experts you have become andreally figuring out how can I do
(28:30):
something that leaves a greaterlegacy is a is a great man's
height to have as you as youenter into your 60s.
It it continues to be importantto bring in optimism, to bring
in learning and seeking and andexpand your circles to get to
know more people, to impactpeople more directly with what
(28:53):
you know and what you've learnedand the purpose and passion that
you have for your life.
Um so again, when we coachpeople at this stage, this is
this is what healthy developmentlooks like in your 60s and going
into your your 70s.
SPEAKER_01 (29:06):
Yeah, it's it is true that you know there's great
opportunity beyond a certainage.
We are living to be older, uhjust across the globe.
And so there's opportunity thereto continue to move forward,
things of that nature that will,in ways that will, as you said,
make an impact, keep us happy ashuman beings, keep us healthy,
(29:29):
and then be able to continue tocontribute.
Again, you know, one gentlemanwho was on the panel who was 82,
he is now teaching at a medicalschool the patient experience,
the family experience.
He's teaching that to young medstudents, and imagine that, you
know, because he has a wealth ofknowledge, he's now imparting
that in a way that they candigest and take and accept.
(29:52):
That's incredible.
SPEAKER_00 (29:53):
I was so inspired by by his story.
It was amazing.
You know, as we as we round into70s, many.
People are retiring at thispoint.
Some retire earlier, 40s, 50s.
But many are retiring in their60s or or 70s.
And that doesn't mean we stopmaking impact.
Again, this optimism, thiswillingness to embrace what
(30:16):
we've learned and make ourselvesteachers and inject ourselves
into communities around us to beable to help lift them up with
what we've learned and what weknow and continue learning like
that and continue believing inthe positive impact that you can
leave it becomes incrediblyimportant as you as you get into
your 70s and beyond.
(30:38):
And then I'm going to speak alittle bit about just leaving
your legacy.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (30:47):
One thing about, you know, when we get to, yeah,
again, seeing people, and we'vewe've got some friends who are
in their 70s and the 80s andthings.
And with that, there is theability, as you said, continue
to move forward, continue tocontribute.
There are these things that wecan do, again, partly because
we're living to uh to be older,partly because it's exciting.
(31:09):
Um people are still they'removing around more than ever
within the the country, withinthe the globe.
People still want to travel.
And it used to be, I canremember when I was a child,
there was like a certain pointin time almost people didn't
want to travel any greatdistances after a certain age.
But now people, again, they'reengaged, they're healthier
lifestyles, they are connectingin to give back in one way or
(31:33):
another, in a civic manner,whatever it may be, to their
community.
And we're finding thatcommunities are starting to
value the different generationsmuch more than they did before.
There are a lot of studies aboutit now out there.
There's good work going on, forexample, in developing
intergenerational housing.
(31:54):
So it's not seg you knowsegmenting different by age.
It's, for example, there aresome developers who are
experimenting with puttinghousing, intergenerational
housing, on college campuses oron the edge of them.
Yeah.
Near high schools.
Why?
Because it brings safety, itbrings knowledge, it brings a
perspective of more peoplearound to help see what's going
on.
All these things there.
(32:15):
They are building and developingnow housing for cohabitating
different generations, but notnecessarily by family.
And guess what?
In some cases, the person who ismaybe 60, 70, 80, who's maybe
part of that household, is alsoable to impart and help with the
child if there's that family, ifthere's a family in there and
(32:35):
they have a child.
There's benefit there.
Crime is lower where you havethat component of that.
And even just the communityitself and the vibrancy of
communities is raised by havingthese intergenerational
interactions.
SPEAKER_00 (32:49):
And you hit at a core theme that is so incredibly
important at every stage of ourlife, and that is being a part
of a community that wecontribute to, that lifts us up,
that helps us.
It takes a village, right?
So I think that's incrediblyimportant when you look at blue
zone research that shows uh thecritical factors that exist in
(33:12):
these communities where thereare more people over the age of
100 than anywhere else in theworld.
Community is is front andcenter.
Um movement, eating well, butbut community, lifting each
other up and um and really twhere young people communicate
with older people in ways thatdon't ignore them but include
(33:34):
them.
unknown (33:34):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (33:35):
And and the same.
Uh you know, both both olderpeople do the same.
SPEAKER_01 (33:39):
One of the things that, again, there are reports
on that that show thisdefinitely happens, that as
people age, and if they're notinteracting or they are left to
have no interaction with people,they have a greater uh
opportunity, they have a greateruh challenge of cognitive
(34:00):
decline.
Because it's that humaninteraction that again connects
the brain and it allows us tokeep moving our mind.
Yeah.
And that's that sense ofbelonging and well-being that
also matters.
It's not just, you know, mythinking about things, it's that
sense of well-being, the senseof being accepted, the sense of
being part of something helpsthe brain to have the endorphins
(34:23):
going and being able to ensurethat you know we're not going to
prematurely have a cognitivedecline.
And we that's on a rise in ourcountry because we do isolate
more.
SPEAKER_00 (34:33):
Yes, and it's worse coming out of COVID.
Yes, we do.
And it's worse coming out ofCOVID, I think.
Yes.
You know, as we think aboutmoving in from 70s into 80s and
even beyond that, legacy isreally the impact, but making
sure that you intentionallyremain a part of a community,
(34:53):
intentionally challenge yourthinking and your learning, um,
enables you to to to grow to bea person that that leaves a
legacy.
Um, and I think that'scritically important.
Um, and I have been extremelyinspired by several people over
the age of 80 recently who areprobably more fit than I am.
SPEAKER_01 (35:17):
So which which is which is really a great thing to
have out there.
SPEAKER_00 (35:21):
I want to share a few facts that we have learned.
Um, the study published in NewEngland Journal of Medicine
found that you reach the top ofyour potential around age 60,
and this continues well intoyour 80s.
Uh, another fact, potential canbe reached on a personal,
professional, andor spirituallevel.
And really, the whole personneeds to embrace all of that.
(35:44):
Agreed.
Um, another fact, healthy agingincludes community, healthy
meals, and active lifestyle.
We see that in the blue zone umanecdotes and in the blue zone
studies.
And then the final thing I'llshare is that blue zones who do
have the most hundred-pluspeople have extremely strong
intergenerational communitycommunities and connectivity.
(36:06):
So I think these are thingswe've talked about, but but also
really backed up by researchthat that not only is this good
for you if you embrace thatdecade of your life in this way
and you move to the next onewith this mindset, but it it it
helps everyone.
SPEAKER_01 (36:20):
So absolutely.
So as we close out, one coupleof things I will share is number
one, if you have any questionsor just want to hear more, uh
reach out to us.
Uh go to Ford Bar's Podcast andyou'll have be able to connect
with us through there throughemail, and we will get back to
you and share any information,answer any questions you may
have.
The other thing is as we are nowentering into the holiday
(36:44):
season, it's opportunity for allof us to think about how can I
connect with someone?
Whether no one's connected withme or not, it doesn't matter.
How can I connect with someoneand maybe they are my age, but
also maybe they are a differentage.
And just remember, we all havesomething to value.
We've had some of the mostprofound discussions in the last
(37:04):
probably six months with peoplesimply by including them,
connecting with them, helpingthem meet someone else.
So when you're out and about inyour community, there are
Christmas festivals starting togo as we're into Thanksgiving
here coming up, and we've allrecently, for example, had our
tree lighting of our square andon decorations down there.
(37:24):
That's happening acrosscommunities across the world.
Yes.
Take the opportunity to get out,meet someone new, talk to them,
learn a little bit about them,engage with them, maybe even
share your contact informationwith them and connect over
coffee.
And you might be surprised athow good you feel, but also how
it makes the other person be.
SPEAKER_00 (37:43):
We went to an event recently where we were
challenged to meet somebody wedidn't know and share something
very vulnerable.
And I had coffee with theindividual.
Um, so it was really, reallycool way to expand my community.
So, and and I'm we'll we'regonna go for a hike, which is
kind of cool.
Um Yeah, and uh just a fewthings.
(38:05):
If you enjoyed today, pleaseshare it with someone else and
follow us atfourbarspodcast.com.
Subscribe on your favoritepodcast platform.
And if you know of an individualor a company that might be
interested in sponsoring futureepisodes, let us know.
Reach out to us through the fourbars podcast.
(38:26):
As is generally the case, wewill put up um some resources
related to what we talked abouttoday in the website, and so you
can check them out there.
Thank you for joining.
Have a great day and happyholidays.
Yes, indeed.
SPEAKER_01 (38:40):
Have a wonderful holiday.
SPEAKER_00 (38:41):
The Four Bars Podcast has been brought to you
by Edges Inc., a growth advisoryfirm based in Bentonville,
Arkansas.
I founded the company in 2001.
SPEAKER_01 (38:49):
Edges promotes growth people, companies, and
ideas.
Our team collaboration toolcalled Interface Methods is a
basis for teams to work togethermore collaboratively, understand
each other, and acceptdifferences and address
challenges together.
SPEAKER_00 (39:02):
We also started a nonprofit called Unform Your
Bias.
We teach kids and their adultinfluencers how to utilize
storytelling as a means toreduce bias in the world.
We hope you'll check us out,subscribe to our podcast, and
look at our website.
As you approach 30, I think that most of us want to
try everything that we can try.
And as a result, we have to kindof believe that we can do it.
So we think we're good at a lotof things.
And we have confidence in a lotof things to try.
Now it's entirely possible we wedon't have confidence when we're
(00:22):
trying, but we're beingencouraged by someone to do it.
And so what we're doing isreally trying on a lot of
different hats.
And so sometimes that can comeacross as hey, you you know it
all, or you think that you knowit all.
Welcome to the four barspodcast.
I'm Ken Leith.
And I'm Patty Leith.
We are your host for somecompelling dialogue, encouraging
(00:43):
our listeners to strengthentheir connections and build
strong communities, lifting eachother up and connecting in ways
that matter.
We named the podcast Four Barsas a reference to how hard we
work to find a four barsconnection on our devices.
SPEAKER_01 (00:57):
And we wondered what could happen with relationships
if we worked as hard atconnecting.
Let's find out.
SPEAKER_00 (01:03):
Welcome back to Four Bars Podcast.
I'm one of your hosts, KenLeith.
And I'm Patty Leith, yourco-host.
We're excited to be back againtoday.
We're going to kind of wrap upour series on generations.
Ken, wasn't it a great, greatexperience to do the panel?
SPEAKER_01 (01:20):
Uh yes, it was.
Um, for everyone here who's hada chance to see it, we hope
you've really enjoyed it andgotten something.
It was was an incredibleexperience with having five
generations represented.
SPEAKER_00 (01:32):
Yeah, everyone's the storytelling was so amazing.
Like it was, you know, every nowand then you get this experience
where you're in something reallyspecial and you just feel so
blessed to be there.
That's kind of how I felt aboutthat that experience and and and
frankly the conversationsleading up to it.
SPEAKER_01 (01:52):
It um from my personal perspective, I think
Ian, you can share yours, but itreally for me, there were just
multiple surreal moments andthings that I expected that were
really expanded upon withrespect to, oh yes, um, I was
like this.
And then someone else from adifferent generation says, well,
we we do that sometimes too.
(02:12):
Yeah.
And the commonalities and thenfinding out where we were
different sometimes, what wasdriving that?
Uh was that a technologydifference?
Was that just life eventsdifferences?
What's uh what it could havebeen for each of those folks?
But they had those moments whereyou just really said, you can't
script that.
And they were incredible, all ofthem.
SPEAKER_00 (02:35):
And if you're listening or watching for the
first time and you have no ideawhat we're talking about, um, we
had a distinct opportunity to doa panel of people spanning five
generations at Blake StreetHouse in Bentonville.
Ken and I facilitated it.
We had some of the bestpanelists tell their stories
about what it's like to beinside of their generation.
(02:57):
Uh our youngest panelist was 24,our oldest panelist was 82.
Um, and uh we had an opportunityto hear their stories and really
see the differences, but as Kensaid, the commonalities.
The coolest part was that wetaped it for the podcast.
So if you uh subscribe to FourBars or go to Far
(03:19):
FourBarsPodcast.com, you'll findthose episodes.
They are the last three episodesto have dropped.
And today will be just somecommentary about the topic on to
sort of wrap up this concept ofbuilding community across
generations.
And Ken and I are superpassionate about that.
SPEAKER_01 (03:36):
Yeah, and I the last thing I'll share on that is for
me is I was struck by the factthat it was the transparency and
the vulnerability that peopleshared.
Um and I'll stress to everyonewhether you've seen it or not,
these folks did not know eachother uh prior to maybe one
short 15-minute meeting uhbefore we had sat down and did
(03:57):
the podcast with them.
But what they shared was sodifferent to expose their
feelings, their thoughts, theirfears on some of the challenges
they may experience, whether youare uh, you know, a Gen Z or a
traditionalist.
They all have some challengesbased upon their age, and
sometimes these judgments thatcan creep in based upon, well,
(04:20):
this person might be older oryounger.
They either may not know enough,or maybe they're looked at as
they're not as relevant anymore.
But the fact is they all hadsomething incredibly positive
and meaningful to share.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (04:34):
So Edges, our company, has been doing work
with our client organizationsfor many years in the area of
helping generations communicatebetter together.
Um, so we've done a lot of thatwork, and over the years we've
learned a lot about generationaldifferences.
And the the podcast part one,part two, and part three of that
(04:58):
panel experience really get atthe the different life
experiences that that people hadwho are who are in the category
called Gen X, Gen Z, millennial,traditional, baby boomer, um,
not in that order, but but justthe things that were going on in
(05:20):
their lives from a current eventstandpoint, the challenges that
they and their families had toum confront when they were
children, the um the technologyaccess, all of these things are
going to lead to thesegenerational differences.
But one of the things that wefound through our work is that
there are some things that aregoing to lead to these
(05:42):
generational differences thathave nothing to do with culture
or current events or lifeexperience.
It just has to do with the factthat, hey, I'm in my 50s and
you're in your 20s.
Ooh, you're a youngwhippersnapper, right?
People have been saying thatsince my dad was in his 40s.
Um rest his soul, he would be,he would be over 100 today.
(06:02):
So I I think that that that'sthat is something that we are
also really passionate about isuh helping people understand how
can I embrace these differentgenerations, not because they're
so different from me, butbecause they're just like I was
when I was that age.
So we've done a fair amount ofanecdotal research um in a
(06:25):
project we call My Mother HatesMy Music.
Um and I think that speaks foritself as to why we call it, I
think for for all of time, momshave been telling kids to turn
that down, um, it because thatis just sort of the the the life
stage that we're in.
SPEAKER_01 (06:42):
It yes, and it's been going on probably since the
dawn of time.
Yeah uh with respect to that.
And for example, we've over theyears with our our business,
we've had C-level folks talk tous about well, this group, for
example, millennials, well, theywant to work on their own terms,
they don't work as hard.
Um, those were fallacies, numberone.
(07:02):
They were just needing to bemotivated and different.
And every generation needs tohave some different motivations
with respect to things.
The other thing about uh some ofthe times when we have these
conversations with uh businessleaders, it's well, they have
these things where it's like, Idon't know how to connect with
them.
And our conversation with themis is to be able to help them
show how to connect with them,but just as importantly why it's
(07:25):
important to connect with them,as we would s share with them
years ago with some of them.
Well, those are your nextgeneration of leaders, and if
you do not connect with them,you're going to have a hard time
maintaining your workforce,getting the top of the top of no
matter what their age is, andthen ensuring that you have
continuity within yourorganization.
(07:46):
But if you do embrace them, whathappens is what we've seen
happen for many companies thatwe've been working with for
years.
Those people who are enteringtheir workforce then are now in
some of their leadership roles.
And they needed that to makethat and for the next however
many years businesses arearound, which will be forever,
you need to be sure that youconnect with those generations
(08:09):
instead of complaining.
We need to embrace them andfigure out and then bring them
in to what is we have toaccomplish.
SPEAKER_00 (08:14):
It has been going on since for ages.
And and and as you said that,I'm I'm wondering, you know,
what did that look like in inthe in the times of more
primitive living?
Um, you know, did kids annoytheir parents?
I I believe it's entirelypossible that they did.
SPEAKER_01 (08:32):
Uh yeah, likely.
I'm sure that along the way mymy parents may have said at
times, I may have been a littlebit annoying.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (08:40):
I remember being told by a minister when I was
probably 13 and I wascomplaining about how stupid my
parents were.
Um, he he assured me that theywould get smarter by the time I
hit 25.
Yeah.
It doesn't necessarily work thatway, but okay.
So one of the things that wewant to do, because we do
utilize our research a lot whenwe're coaching, we want to share
(09:02):
some thoughts with you aboutways that you can develop in a
in a you know towards towardspositivity based on where you
are in the stages of your life.
Like what does healthydevelopment look like?
And what happens if we get stuckin a particular stage and we
don't work through it?
(09:23):
Absolutely.
So I think it really is justembracing the people of a
different age are different formany reasons, but one of the
reasons is because they're adifferent age.
And it's entirely possible thatI was very similar at that age.
So let's take a look at we'restarting um in the workplace
(09:45):
age.
Um, so late teens, early 20s,um, as you approach 30, I think
that um most of us want to tryeverything that we can try.
And as a result, we have to kindof believe that we can do it.
So we think we're good at a lotof things, um, and we have
(10:07):
confidence in a lot of things totry.
Now it's entirely possible we wedon't have confidence when we're
trying, but we're beingencouraged by someone to do it.
And so so what we're doing isreally trying on a lot of
different hats.
Um, and and so sometimes thatcan come across as hey, you you
know it all, or you think thatyou know it all.
(10:28):
Um, but but in fact, in order toreally figure out what we want
to do, we do have to try a lotof things.
I I think it's helpful if whenyou're interacting with people
around you that you share thatyou're trying a lot of different
things, and if there's anyvulnerability in your confidence
level, you can share that too.
But Ken, think about yourself inyour 20s.
(10:48):
Who are you?
SPEAKER_01 (10:50):
Well, I'll share what I can on that one.
Um, no, in my 20s.
SPEAKER_00 (10:54):
I've been told I wouldn't marry you if I knew you
then, so there's that.
SPEAKER_01 (10:58):
Yes.
Uh many have told you that Ibelieve.
Many have told me that.
Um, I think that for me in my20s, especially it was just, you
know, I think my early 20s, andthen I segment my 20s a little
bit there.
You know, there's a time whereyou're just in school and
working, you're coming out ofschool.
Um, and um for me also, youknow, I I had a daughter at a
(11:20):
young age in my 20s with respectto that.
And, you know, that was a greatexperience.
But what it did for me, I thinkmy life was a little bit
different from some othersbecause you know, you get out of
school and then you you know youget married and then you're
having a child.
It's like, oh, you have to growup a little bit quicker
sometimes there too.
Because now you're responsiblefor a human being.
Yes, yes, and but still at thesame time in the job market, for
(11:42):
example, um I found myselfsometimes trying to overdo, and
that led to some mistakes,honestly.
Yeah, yeah, so with respect tothat, where I was trying to
exceed expectations for others,but also with the um mindset
that I wanted to jump ahead andI wanted to be able to show that
(12:04):
I could jump ahead, and thensometimes I had to really learn
to sit back and learn more andnot take it as they were talking
to me um in a way that wascondescending or anything,
because it wasn't most of thetime.
It was really it was just aboutsharing with me.
Um, one thing I will share withanyone who's doing, you know,
(12:24):
even when I was after I gotmarried, so as a young person, I
looked a lot younger for my ageat that time.
I also had long hair.
Well, I can tell you there werepeople back then who would
literally look at me and say,Well, how could you be doing X
job?
I'll I'll never forget my firstmanagerial job, and I was like
off proud of that.
(12:45):
And I go out to see a customerand I knock on a door, and it
was in a job where I was leadingthe customer experience, and
there were some concerns there.
So the customer wanted to speakto someone beyond my team.
And I was still relatively newin the job, and the gentleman
opens the door, and he says, Whoare you?
And I explain here, my name'sKen Leith, and I'm here to see
(13:07):
you.
Uh now you here you have aconcern, so I'd like to review
that with you and see if I canassist you.
And he looks at me and he goes,Well, if you're gonna be able to
help me, and I'll never forgetthis, then I could be CEO of
your company, I guess.
To which as I think back about,I'm sure my face didn't say it
at first.
SPEAKER_00 (13:25):
That was um, my mother hates my music.
Yeah, you you look too young toknow what you're doing, and
therefore you cannot do it.
Absolutely.
This is one of the reasons thatin our 20s we have to believe
that we can.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (13:38):
Because so many people don't.
So I had to think on my feetthere a little bit and and
really quickly come around thefact that, well, sir, my company
is assured that I am ready and Iam powered enough to be able to
assist you and whatever that maybe.
And if there's something I can'tdo for you, I can reach back out
to my company and to my boss.
(13:58):
Yeah.
So after that, he kind of said,okay, let's go in and talk and
stuff.
But it was just that very firstexperience.
And I and I had several of them,as you might expect during that
time.
Um, so not to be um surprised.
It wasn't probably too muchlonger after that.
I cut my hair.
Uh not because of that, but Ireally thought, okay, if I'm
gonna have some barriers put upjust because of that, I don't
(14:20):
want them to hold me back.
SPEAKER_00 (14:21):
Well, I think confidence is is critical in
your 20s.
And if it doesn't comenaturally, surround yourself
with people who help you buildthat up.
I think um discipline is is alsoreally important to have from a
healthy development standpoint.
If I if I think back on my 20plus year old self, I'm I was
(14:42):
pretty scrappy.
And and I I think that believingthat you can is really, really
important, not only in your 20s,and and frankly, I'm gonna I'm
gonna throw out the thought thatwe should all be feeling that
way about life.
But there is an optimism whenyou're just starting out in your
career or in your adult lifethat is tempered with a bit of
(15:05):
humor about how adulting isn'treally all it's cracked up to
be.
But it is an optimism that ishealthy to carry into future
stages of life.
SPEAKER_01 (15:14):
I I agree.
And uh you know this about me,and probably anyone who knows me
well, even today, knows that Igenerally am a very confident
individual that I can figurethings out, I can work through
them one way or another, and Idon't necessarily always, I'm
not always capable of doing itmyself.
I sometimes do need to reach outfor help.
That was one of my biggestchallenges when I was younger.
(15:36):
Okay.
Just not reaching out.
SPEAKER_00 (15:37):
Really asking for help.
And that sort of leads us to the30s.
I think by the time we hit our30s, we have figured out what
we're gonna do in life, whetherthat's professionally or
personally or some combinationof the two.
Um, and by the time we arehitting our 30s, we're really,
we're really kind of settling into something that we have found
out we're good at, we'repassionate about, hopefully.
(16:01):
And um and if not, it it you canprobably keep looking.
Um, but we're also, if it's acareer, we're also looking at uh
a path to income when we're inour 30s.
But one of the things that webegin to see in our 30s is
there's a story, and for many ofus, it's a bit of a harder story
that we have to work through inorder to set down the things
(16:26):
that are barriers for us andreally excel.
Um, so I always say that the30s, if if healthy development
is happening, they are a time ofpersonal exploration about your
story, about your wiring, aboutthe key things that make you who
you are, and um and the thingsthat are getting in the way that
might have an origin that ismore negative.
(16:47):
Your story doesn't define yourfuture, um, but it does create
your strength.
SPEAKER_01 (16:53):
So in our 30s, one of the things that occurs is
that if after we go through our20s, we've tasted a little bit
of different things.
Maybe we have tried differentroles within the same company,
maybe we've shifted companiestrying to go to something else.
What it does is it allows us tostart to formulate what are the
things that I do day to day thatI enjoy doing and what are the
(17:16):
things that I'm good at.
SPEAKER_00 (17:17):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (17:18):
And then the next thing is how do I get to do them
all the time or in a manner thatmakes me happy and fulfilling.
SPEAKER_00 (17:27):
Yeah.
And these are good choices.
Now I always say if you haven't,if you're in your 40s or 50s and
you haven't made those choicesyet, it's never too late.
Um, but but in your 30s, really,it is a time where you can begin
to dial in on on these thingsthat really are gonna give you
motivation and drive, therefore,continue your optimism.
(17:48):
Absolutely.
SPEAKER_01 (17:49):
It's a good it's a good place to be where we start
to really hone in on things thatwill set us up for the rest of
our lives, so to speak, and getus into positions where we can
really say, this is where I'mgoing to be, this is what I'm
going to do, and settle intothat and grow those strengths.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (18:08):
I think um then as we move into our 40s, and again,
it doesn't happen on your 40thbirthday.
I remember on my 40th birthday,I had a party.
Um, it doesn't happen on your40th birthday.
Um it it uh we we sort of beginto settle into what we're doing,
and we get deeper and moreinvolved in that.
(18:30):
If it's professional, we mightmove into a position of
leadership or into aspecialization.
Um, if it's personal, we mightget more involved in community
and civic organizations that ourkids are a part of, and maybe
it's both, but but really in our40s, we begin to see what our
potential can really be.
We start to see that, hey, 40snot really old.
(18:53):
It is it is a launch point intoa future that's more amazing
than I could really realize.
That's why that optimism, um,and but sometimes it's hard to
see that.
And um and and in our 40s, manytimes we have an opportunity and
we should take advantage of.
We have an opportunity to mentorothers, um, whether that's
(19:14):
professionally or or umpersonally, uh, oftentimes that
is where um younger people than40 often see 40, the the
experience that a 40-year-oldbrings to the table as something
that can help them.
A, great mentality for thatyounger person, but B, in your
40s, you should be seeking outways to help lift up others.
(19:37):
Oh, yeah.
Um, from a great, you know, ifif I'm gonna develop myself in
really healthy ways throughoutthe decades.
SPEAKER_01 (19:44):
Yeah.
I kind of laugh now because Ithink back into my twenties and
I used to see people who are40s, and I was like, wow,
they've been around a long time.
They're kind they're kind ofgetting up there now.
And then I laugh about that.
SPEAKER_00 (19:58):
Now I laugh about that too.
But my mother hates my music.
It's really about helping usidentify the things that are
common because of how old weare, not because of the current
events around us, but because ofhow old we are.
You know, to your point, when Iwas in my 20s, I thought
40-year-olds were, wow, that'sreally getting up there.
Um, in and and it's not, right?
(20:20):
It's only just getting started.
SPEAKER_01 (20:22):
Yes.
SPEAKER_00 (20:22):
Um, the other thing about if you're in your 40s,
you're probably watching us andgoing, yeah, you know nothing.
But I'm telling you, it reallyis.
We're a little older than that.
It's it's just getting startedon awesome.
You're just getting started onawesome.
SPEAKER_01 (20:34):
Yeah, and we could talk about a topic at a
different time, but it's as muchmental as it is physical when it
comes to how we age.
Yeah.
It's not just our chronologicalage.
So as we kind of look at peopleand say, wow, they're they are
living this lifestyle or they'redoing great.
Yeah.
As a sidebar.
Yeah, we recently met a coupleof gentlemen who were in their
(20:55):
80s who are both very vibrant.
Um, you know, you talk aboutskiing, mountain biking, still
teaching and mentoring.
Uh, it's incredible.
So society does have a place foreveryone.
I'll just sidebar that and comeback to the 40s here.
SPEAKER_00 (21:08):
Physical activity is one we should devote a whole
episode to because you've got agreat story there.
But physical activity is soincredibly important.
But in our 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s,60s, we do it for different
reasons.
Um many of my friends know thatI was a pretty serious runner
for many years.
Um, I'm not now due to some kneeproblems, but but in my 20s, I
(21:31):
ran to compete.
I I soaked in every single eventI could get and met as many
people that I could in thespace, and I ran to compete.
And then in my 30s, I ran to eatbecause my metabolism was
slowing down.
And in my 40s, I ran for stressmanagement.
Um, and then when I hit my 50s,I realized that running is so
(21:51):
that I can keep moving.
SPEAKER_01 (21:52):
Yes.
SPEAKER_00 (21:53):
Right.
And I think that movement is isprogressively important the
older you get, and yet it'ssomething that the young tend to
seek out and then drop.
So physical activity is a bigpart of healthy development, no
matter what age you are.
SPEAKER_01 (22:07):
So the interesting thing about that is it's not
something new to the body ifyou've done it your whole life.
It's just a lifestyle.
Yeah, it is at that point intime.
But I will say for folks whowill hit on the 40s here one
last time from my perspective,is if you're in your mid-30s at
that time, you're generallyyou've either getting your
you've either had your firstopportunity to supervise or
(22:28):
manage and get a taste of that,what that's like.
And as you get into your 40s,maybe it's a little bit later,
you may still be doing that samething.
But generally by your mid-40s, adecision is made, either by you
or by the organization you maybe in, which is I want to lead
people, manage people, I enjoythat as part of what I do, or I
(22:49):
don't.
And it's not for everyone, andthat's okay.
SPEAKER_00 (22:52):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (22:52):
Um, because you can be exceptional at your job,
enjoy your job and love it, butnot have to, you could be an
individual contributor.
SPEAKER_00 (23:00):
And if you're watching or listening and you're
about to turn 40, or yourecently turned 40, I'm gonna
share a story.
I was horrified when I turned40.
Um, little did I know um that itthat it was just the beginning.
But um, but but I went to myneighbor's house and she was a
little older than me.
She was the mother of theteenage girl who babysat for my
(23:21):
son at the time.
And uh she said to me, The goodnews is you're only 40 for a
year, and then it gets so muchbetter.
It's like, oh yeah, so once youcan say the word, it's easier to
embrace it.
Um perspectives.
Yeah, perspectives.
I think that um healthydevelopment as you get into your
50s is that we are now becomingexperts at something.
(23:45):
Um, and and and we maintainrelevance by pursuing ongoing
learning.
U our research has shown that inour 50s, and it doesn't again
just happen on the birthday ofthe decade, but in our 50s, um,
we have a choice.
We can continue to learn andseek relevance and be all that
(24:07):
we can be, or we can settle intothe memories of what we've done.
Um, and frankly, that doesn'tage well if you choose that
second one.
That's really how grumpy olderpeople mentality is born.
Um, staying relevant, pursuinglearning, um, and looking more
to the future, being again thatoptimism that we have in our
(24:27):
20s, if we can just pull that,nourish it into each decade, we
we develop so much better as wemake it through the stages of
our life.
But um when we can do this, westart to make a bigger impact.
And um, and I love coachingpeople who are there because it
(24:47):
is so helpful to really explorehow you can what can you seek to
stay relevant?
How can you not retire in placeor not you know relive the
homecoming game from college oror high school?
SPEAKER_01 (25:02):
Yes.
SPEAKER_00 (25:03):
Not only listen to music that you knew that you
heard when you were 20.
SPEAKER_01 (25:07):
For all the Springsteen fans out there, they
they do remember the song GloryDays.
SPEAKER_00 (25:11):
Yes, indeed.
SPEAKER_01 (25:12):
Um we should only hold on to it for so long.
But I will say too, in the 50s,that's let me back up here.
Basically every and there'splenty written on this from re
reliable sources such as Harvarduh business uh medical or
Cleveland Clinic.
And within that, every 10 years,we're our body's continuing to
(25:33):
move, and so is our brain.
And there's you know, studyafter study about okay, and it
also depends upon do we have anychronic illnesses at any age
that impact that?
Yeah.
Or are we continuing to learn?
Are we moving?
Are we sedentary?
What is it?
But the same thing from abusiness standpoint and how we
live and a personal standpointis are we still seeking to
(25:54):
learn?
Are we still seeking to try newthings?
And we've seen within some folksin their 50s, sometimes they've
truly embraced that and theykeep moving.
And sometimes it is literally,you know, I I think this is
comfortable.
I'm just going to stay righthere a little bit.
And that's where it's a pivotpoint.
(26:17):
And we see people who are evenolder than that now that we talk
to who can even talk about yeah,maybe I should have done things
a little bit different thenbecause I stopped doing some of
the things I learned I loved.
I stopped doing some of thethings that have now impacted
me.
So one of the things I wouldshare with anyone viewing or
listening is simply to if youthink as you grow and you're
(26:38):
growing, you're getting older,you don't have to stop anything
at a certain age unless yourbody says you can't do a certain
thing, for example.
But then you can even adapt.
And your mind, you can keep itgoing because we find that
people who pivot and kind of gosedentary and slow down and stop
looking forward and look backand enjoy that, they tend to
(27:00):
have some more challenges thanthose who don't.
SPEAKER_00 (27:02):
Yeah.
And I I had as as you know, hadto stop running in my 50s, but I
then pivoted that to hiking andcycling and and and still kept
kept going.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Adaptation.
Yeah.
And that's often oftenimportant.
I think in your 50s, the theimportant mindset again is
learning, seeking new, you know,optimism.
(27:29):
Optimism.
Uh to to really be believingthat um it's not over.
There's still a lot, a lot todo.
SPEAKER_01 (27:37):
And I'll go back to the panel discussion we held.
I learned in that discussionfrom people at every age within
those five generations.
Yeah.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (27:48):
So as people move into their 60s, one of the
things that's really interestingis that there are a large number
of studies that show that themajority of people make the
greatest impact in their livesbetween the ages of 60 and 80.
So if you think about being agrandparent, which often starts
(28:10):
in this era, um, maybe a littleyounger, uh, it's it's impop
it's entirely possible it startsin the 40s or 50s.
But when you think about that,that is making an impact on the
next generation.
But I also think that um thatreally embracing yourself with
the experts you have become andreally figuring out how can I do
(28:30):
something that leaves a greaterlegacy is a is a great man's
height to have as you as youenter into your 60s.
It it continues to be importantto bring in optimism, to bring
in learning and seeking and andexpand your circles to get to
know more people, to impactpeople more directly with what
(28:53):
you know and what you've learnedand the purpose and passion that
you have for your life.
Um so again, when we coachpeople at this stage, this is
this is what healthy developmentlooks like in your 60s and going
into your your 70s.
SPEAKER_01 (29:06):
Yeah, it's it is true that you know there's great
opportunity beyond a certainage.
We are living to be older, uhjust across the globe.
And so there's opportunity thereto continue to move forward,
things of that nature that will,in ways that will, as you said,
make an impact, keep us happy ashuman beings, keep us healthy,
(29:29):
and then be able to continue tocontribute.
Again, you know, one gentlemanwho was on the panel who was 82,
he is now teaching at a medicalschool the patient experience,
the family experience.
He's teaching that to young medstudents, and imagine that, you
know, because he has a wealth ofknowledge, he's now imparting
that in a way that they candigest and take and accept.
(29:52):
That's incredible.
SPEAKER_00 (29:53):
I was so inspired by by his story.
It was amazing.
You know, as we as we round into70s, many.
People are retiring at thispoint.
Some retire earlier, 40s, 50s.
But many are retiring in their60s or or 70s.
And that doesn't mean we stopmaking impact.
Again, this optimism, thiswillingness to embrace what
(30:16):
we've learned and make ourselvesteachers and inject ourselves
into communities around us to beable to help lift them up with
what we've learned and what weknow and continue learning like
that and continue believing inthe positive impact that you can
leave it becomes incrediblyimportant as you as you get into
your 70s and beyond.
(30:38):
And then I'm going to speak alittle bit about just leaving
your legacy.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (30:47):
One thing about, you know, when we get to, yeah,
again, seeing people, and we'vewe've got some friends who are
in their 70s and the 80s andthings.
And with that, there is theability, as you said, continue
to move forward, continue tocontribute.
There are these things that wecan do, again, partly because
we're living to uh to be older,partly because it's exciting.
(31:09):
Um people are still they'removing around more than ever
within the the country, withinthe the globe.
People still want to travel.
And it used to be, I canremember when I was a child,
there was like a certain pointin time almost people didn't
want to travel any greatdistances after a certain age.
But now people, again, they'reengaged, they're healthier
lifestyles, they are connectingin to give back in one way or
(31:33):
another, in a civic manner,whatever it may be, to their
community.
And we're finding thatcommunities are starting to
value the different generationsmuch more than they did before.
There are a lot of studies aboutit now out there.
There's good work going on, forexample, in developing
intergenerational housing.
(31:54):
So it's not seg you knowsegmenting different by age.
It's, for example, there aresome developers who are
experimenting with puttinghousing, intergenerational
housing, on college campuses oron the edge of them.
Yeah.
Near high schools.
Why?
Because it brings safety, itbrings knowledge, it brings a
perspective of more peoplearound to help see what's going
on.
All these things there.
(32:15):
They are building and developingnow housing for cohabitating
different generations, but notnecessarily by family.
And guess what?
In some cases, the person who ismaybe 60, 70, 80, who's maybe
part of that household, is alsoable to impart and help with the
child if there's that family, ifthere's a family in there and
(32:35):
they have a child.
There's benefit there.
Crime is lower where you havethat component of that.
And even just the communityitself and the vibrancy of
communities is raised by havingthese intergenerational
interactions.
SPEAKER_00 (32:49):
And you hit at a core theme that is so incredibly
important at every stage of ourlife, and that is being a part
of a community that wecontribute to, that lifts us up,
that helps us.
It takes a village, right?
So I think that's incrediblyimportant when you look at blue
zone research that shows uh thecritical factors that exist in
(33:12):
these communities where thereare more people over the age of
100 than anywhere else in theworld.
Community is is front andcenter.
Um movement, eating well, butbut community, lifting each
other up and um and really twhere young people communicate
with older people in ways thatdon't ignore them but include
(33:34):
them.
unknown (33:34):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (33:35):
And and the same.
Uh you know, both both olderpeople do the same.
SPEAKER_01 (33:39):
One of the things that, again, there are reports
on that that show thisdefinitely happens, that as
people age, and if they're notinteracting or they are left to
have no interaction with people,they have a greater uh
opportunity, they have a greateruh challenge of cognitive
(34:00):
decline.
Because it's that humaninteraction that again connects
the brain and it allows us tokeep moving our mind.
Yeah.
And that's that sense ofbelonging and well-being that
also matters.
It's not just, you know, mythinking about things, it's that
sense of well-being, the senseof being accepted, the sense of
being part of something helpsthe brain to have the endorphins
(34:23):
going and being able to ensurethat you know we're not going to
prematurely have a cognitivedecline.
And we that's on a rise in ourcountry because we do isolate
more.
SPEAKER_00 (34:33):
Yes, and it's worse coming out of COVID.
Yes, we do.
And it's worse coming out ofCOVID, I think.
Yes.
You know, as we think aboutmoving in from 70s into 80s and
even beyond that, legacy isreally the impact, but making
sure that you intentionallyremain a part of a community,
(34:53):
intentionally challenge yourthinking and your learning, um,
enables you to to to grow to bea person that that leaves a
legacy.
Um, and I think that'scritically important.
Um, and I have been extremelyinspired by several people over
the age of 80 recently who areprobably more fit than I am.
SPEAKER_01 (35:17):
So which which is which is really a great thing to
have out there.
SPEAKER_00 (35:21):
I want to share a few facts that we have learned.
Um, the study published in NewEngland Journal of Medicine
found that you reach the top ofyour potential around age 60,
and this continues well intoyour 80s.
Uh, another fact, potential canbe reached on a personal,
professional, andor spirituallevel.
And really, the whole personneeds to embrace all of that.
(35:44):
Agreed.
Um, another fact, healthy agingincludes community, healthy
meals, and active lifestyle.
We see that in the blue zone umanecdotes and in the blue zone
studies.
And then the final thing I'llshare is that blue zones who do
have the most hundred-pluspeople have extremely strong
intergenerational communitycommunities and connectivity.
(36:06):
So I think these are thingswe've talked about, but but also
really backed up by researchthat that not only is this good
for you if you embrace thatdecade of your life in this way
and you move to the next onewith this mindset, but it it it
helps everyone.
SPEAKER_01 (36:20):
So absolutely.
So as we close out, one coupleof things I will share is number
one, if you have any questionsor just want to hear more, uh
reach out to us.
Uh go to Ford Bar's Podcast andyou'll have be able to connect
with us through there throughemail, and we will get back to
you and share any information,answer any questions you may
have.
The other thing is as we are nowentering into the holiday
(36:44):
season, it's opportunity for allof us to think about how can I
connect with someone?
Whether no one's connected withme or not, it doesn't matter.
How can I connect with someoneand maybe they are my age, but
also maybe they are a differentage.
And just remember, we all havesomething to value.
We've had some of the mostprofound discussions in the last
(37:04):
probably six months with peoplesimply by including them,
connecting with them, helpingthem meet someone else.
So when you're out and about inyour community, there are
Christmas festivals starting togo as we're into Thanksgiving
here coming up, and we've allrecently, for example, had our
tree lighting of our square andon decorations down there.
(37:24):
That's happening acrosscommunities across the world.
Yes.
Take the opportunity to get out,meet someone new, talk to them,
learn a little bit about them,engage with them, maybe even
share your contact informationwith them and connect over
coffee.
And you might be surprised athow good you feel, but also how
it makes the other person be.
SPEAKER_00 (37:43):
We went to an event recently where we were
challenged to meet somebody wedidn't know and share something
very vulnerable.
And I had coffee with theindividual.
Um, so it was really, reallycool way to expand my community.
So, and and I'm we'll we'regonna go for a hike, which is
kind of cool.
Um Yeah, and uh just a fewthings.
(38:05):
If you enjoyed today, pleaseshare it with someone else and
follow us atfourbarspodcast.com.
Subscribe on your favoritepodcast platform.
And if you know of an individualor a company that might be
interested in sponsoring futureepisodes, let us know.
Reach out to us through the fourbars podcast.
(38:26):
As is generally the case, wewill put up um some resources
related to what we talked abouttoday in the website, and so you
can check them out there.
Thank you for joining.
Have a great day and happyholidays.
Yes, indeed.
SPEAKER_01 (38:40):
Have a wonderful holiday.
SPEAKER_00 (38:41):
The Four Bars Podcast has been brought to you
by Edges Inc., a growth advisoryfirm based in Bentonville,
Arkansas.
I founded the company in 2001.
SPEAKER_01 (38:49):
Edges promotes growth people, companies, and
ideas.
Our team collaboration toolcalled Interface Methods is a
basis for teams to work togethermore collaboratively, understand
each other, and acceptdifferences and address
challenges together.
SPEAKER_00 (39:02):
We also started a nonprofit called Unform Your
Bias.
We teach kids and their adultinfluencers how to utilize
storytelling as a means toreduce bias in the world.
We hope you'll check us out,subscribe to our podcast, and
look at our website.
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