Leading by Example: Are You the Hero of Your Story?

Ep. 74  Leading by Example: Are You the Hero of Your Story?

Ever feel like you're living two lives - the one you present to the world and the one that exists when nobody's watching? Our quick-hitter episode tackles the powerful concept of leading by example and what it truly means to align your actions with your words.

We unpack the "Movie Crew Mindset" - a mental framework that challenges you to live as if cameras are rolling from the moment your alarm sounds until your head hits the pillow. Would you be proud watching that footage? This simple yet profound question has transformed how we approach each day, whether as parents, professionals, or community members.

Parents will particularly connect with our discussion about how "more is caught than taught" when raising children. Those little ones are absorbing everything - from how you speak to siblings to how you treat the family dog. They become walking mirrors reflecting your best and worst behaviors back to you.

For professionals, we challenge the common misconception that leadership comes from a title or position. True leadership begins with self-leadership - those "lonely hours" when you're investing in yourself without external pressure. If you're waiting for work hours to develop as a leader, you're missing the foundation of authentic influence.

The ripple effect of our example extends further than we realize. From punctuality to work ethic, attitude to integrity - others are constantly calibrating their standards based on what they see modeled. Are you setting a standard worth following? Are your actions truly matching your words? If you want to be a leader who makes a lasting impact, it starts with you.

Ready to become the hero of your own story? Listen now and discover how small daily choices create the legacy you'll leave behind. Share your thoughts with us - we love hearing how these conversations impact your journey!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is a piece of advice that I give people is
utilize the movie crew mindset.
Envision you know whether youfake it for a week.
That's that's the test that Isell people.
Fake it for a week.
Pretend there's a movie crewthat's following you from the
second.
Your alarm goes off to thesecond.
Your head hits the pillow.
You know and that's the movie.

(00:21):
If you watch that movie backback, are you proud of that
person.

Speaker 2 (00:51):
What's up?
Welcome back to the Go, all Inpodcast.

Speaker 1 (00:53):
I'm Jake Fine and I'm Braxton Cave.
In today's quick hitter episodewe are going to hit on leading
by example and you know, beforewe jump into this one, I got to
give a quick special shout outto Andrew finally joining us.

Speaker 2 (01:07):
Andrew.

Speaker 1 (01:08):
James For a podcast episode coming right off of
baseball practice.
So pretty cool that he's ableto join us and listen in.
He hasn't yelled at us yet.

Speaker 2 (01:16):
Past his bedtime too.

Speaker 1 (01:17):
Saying anything that we shouldn't.

Speaker 2 (01:20):
Past his bedtime.

Speaker 1 (01:21):
It's past my bedtime, our bedtime, so let's dig in
bedtime, our bedtime.

Speaker 2 (01:26):
So let's dig in.

Speaker 1 (01:26):
I'm going to go right into this.
So for me, leading by example,my example, is the only thing in
my life that I can control andI truly take that to heart and
that's like I probably obsessover, like setting a standard

(01:48):
and there's trust me, there'sgood and bad to that.

Speaker 2 (01:52):
Oh yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:52):
There's times when my wife lets me know when I'm
getting a little too far out ofcontrol.
She's got to pull me back alittle bit, but it's just, it's
so critical to me of the examplethat I set.
The first you know, bullet I'llhit on here is when it comes to

(02:12):
parenting, and in parentingmore is caught than taught, and
I see it every day with my kids.
You know, especially Copeland,my middle, you know he, you know
he's like my little mini me inall the best and worst ways.
And there's times when I veryquickly, it's like watching film

(02:33):
how I react and then I it playsback right to me with the way
that he'll, you know, I'll seehow he'll respond to his
siblings and or how he talks tothe dog, respond to his siblings
and or how he talks to the dog.
Right, that's been a new one inour household with a new dog,
and I'm like man, he, that'scoming straight from me and so
to me it's a good reminder of myexample and how I approach

(02:56):
every day from a businessperspective.
You know, I'm, I'm a truebeliever in, in, in business,
and you can relate to otherthings as well, but to me, in
business you cannot effectivelylead others until you can
effectively lead yourself.
And I see it all the time withpeople who come to me and they

(03:20):
want to have one-on-ones andtalk through hey, what's my
career path?
I really want to be a leader.
And I look at them and I'm likehow do you approach the day?
Walk me through your routine,and then I go oh, I just get up
and I drink a cup of coffee andthen I just come into work and
I'm like what about nighttime?
What do you do at nighttime?

(03:49):
Well, I hustle home to take careof the kids and then, you know,
sit on the couch and watchnetflix or something, and then I
go to bed pull a bowl ofsaratoga water, yeah, and I'm
like, well, at what point do youwork on you?
I'm like, well, I really don'tget a chance to do that while
I'm at work.
I'm like, well, none of us doLike, if you want to lead your,
if you want to be able to leadpeople, you got to be able to
lead yourself to another level,and that happens outside of work
hours, like the company's notpaying you to sit here and you

(04:14):
know work on yourself, right,we're working on our craft while
we're here.
But the real magic happensright In those lonely hours
where it's just you, thoselonely hours where it's just you
and then you know.
The last thing I'll hit on hereand this is a piece of advice
that I give people is utilizethe movie crew mindset.

(04:36):
Envision, you know whether.
Fake it for a week.
That's the test I always tellpeople.
Fake it for a week.
Pretend there's a movie crewthat's following you from the
second.
Your alarm goes off to thesecond.
Your head hits the pillow, youknow, and that's a movie crew
that's following you from thesecond.
Your alarm goes off to thesecond.
Your head hits the pillow, youknow, and that's the movie.
Like if you watch that movieback, are you proud of that
person and what they did eachday and how they approach each

(04:57):
day and how they you know thethings that they did when nobody
was watching you know.
That's where the true testcomes.

Speaker 2 (05:04):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (05:05):
And I want to say Rogan or somebody mentioned this
on a podcast a long time agoand it just that one really
stuck with me, you know, causethere's days where you know I, I
find myself pretending that I'mon a.
Call it a reality TV show, callit what you want, call it a
reality TV show, call it whatyou want.
But like I do things to astandard as if someone's

(05:28):
watching and you know I've I'vesaid this to you in the past.
Like I, I often do that Like Ilost, I lost my grandfather last
year, uh, who was a hugeinfluence in my life.
Like the hardest worker, youknow, big time blue collar guy
worked two jobs, like his wholelife, and you know, with him in

(05:49):
heaven, you know, looking down,I'm like would he be proud of
how I'm, how I'm working, howI'm going after this day?
Like I, I think about stufflike that and it's maybe that's
taking it to another level forsome people, um, but it's a true
like daily motivator for me andthat's to me, that's.
That's not external, that's aninternal motivation that I have

(06:13):
every single day.
So I would say, be the hero ofyour story yeah, you're the
writer, that's right.

Speaker 2 (06:23):
So, um, my first point you know, actions speak
louder than words.
You know I know a lot of peoplehave heard that If you want
people to follow your leadwhether it's your, you know your
team, family, community youhave to show them, not just tell
them.
You can preach discipline andthen slack off.
You can't expect hard work fromothers if you don't give it

(06:44):
yourself.
I mean, they see everything.
Jackie's son sees everything.
He is like her carbon copy andthey're like exactly like he
does the same thing, same anticsas she does.
I mean, they see everything.
It's unbelievable, and I knowyour kids do the same with you.

(07:06):
But you know, know, going intoleadership you know you spoke on
this it's not about the title,it's about the impact and your
choices, your actions.
That creates the ripple effectand the way you carry yourself,
the effort you put in, theenergy you bring.
It all influences everybodythat's watching you, that's
around you.
It's just like.

(07:28):
I'll just use work, for example, if you and see a person that's
consistently late you know fiveto 10 minutes they're like,
okay, that guy's always late,but they're not getting on him.
Oh, I guess I can do that too.
You know, it's just, it's aripple effect and everybody's
going to follow suit what theydo.
Oh, he can get away with it,I'm going to do it.

(07:49):
But yeah, integrity, you know,isn't about being great when
people are looking, it's aboutwho you are when you aren't.
And, um, like you, you're agreat leader.
You build others up.
Um, if your leadership is onlyabout you, you're doing it wrong
.
I it's like I want to seeeverybody else win.
Um, if, if everybody had thatsame mindset and wanted to see

(08:10):
everybody else win, this countrywould not be be in the
situation that it is right nowEverybody against each other and
the hate and all that.
But yeah, that's my points, youknow short and sweet, you know.

Speaker 1 (08:25):
I think another key piece when you're in leading by
example is I think humilityplays such a big role in it and
you know to be able to admitwhen you're wrong and take
feedback.
And I I I've struggled withthat at times of like you know,

(08:46):
you feel like you're pouringeverything in and doing
everything right and then to getfeedback that you're totally
missing like that's hard, that'sa hard pill to swallow at times
.
Um, I'm currently reading areally good book called the
first 90 days and who wrote that?

Speaker 2 (09:03):
I'm blanking on it yeah, I'm blanking on it um I've
heard of it, though, but I justcan't think it's an incredible
book, and there it's.

Speaker 1 (09:10):
What I love is it's broken out to give you, like
action, actionable steps to takeas you're you know whether
you're taking on a newleadership position or you're
moving into a new company or anew role.
It gives you like definedaction items to take.
But another piece in it is itgives you you know some of the

(09:31):
best, you know the best practice, or the best steps, best you
know, the, the best practice orthe best steps, and in in that I
have written so many notes oflike me looking back, as I've
taken on different roles ofwhere yep, I could have done
that better.
Like, oh, I fell right intothat trap.

Speaker 2 (09:46):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (09:46):
I did, and I think that's okay, all right, cause
you're learning as you go, butthose are the mistakes that I
don't want to make as I continueto move on and grow and so
being able to reflect andactually absorb.
That, I think, is a big part ofleadership and leading by
example.
It's showing others like Idon't have all the answers and

(10:08):
being okay with that andlearning from others.
And then I think that you saidit building others up, and then
I think that you said itbuilding others up.
I think the greatestaccomplishment you can have as a
leader in Leaning by Example isseeing those who you have led
continue to grow, whether that'syour kids or people on your

(10:28):
team, whether that's in sportsor work.
Watching them grow and taketheir next steps is, I think,
the coolest part of leadership.

Speaker 2 (10:34):
Yeah, you're setting them up and they're going to set
their people up too.
So, like I said, it's a rippleeffect.
So you know, in closing, youknow you got to ask yourself are
you truly leading by example?
You know, are your actionsmatching your words?
You know, are you raising thestandard for yourself and those
around you?
You know, if you want to be aleader, it starts with you.

(10:54):
You know, it's simple as thatyou got.
You got to set the tone and goall in.
You know, with everything.

Speaker 1 (11:09):
So, yeah, that's it.
Yeah, if you, if you guys gotsome value out of this or have
any questions, reach out, tag uslove getting the feedback from
you guys and and it's veryvaluable to us, but then also
hopefully, we're adding value toyou so and we have a guest
coming up we do have a guestcoming up.
Yep um, totally differentbackground and story than nick
um who was our prior guest.

(11:30):
Uh, really looking forward tothis one, I think you guys will.
You guys will get a story oftragedy and how he worked
through that and being on thefront lines of that tragedy.
Crazy story, but a great human,someone who I learn from every

(11:52):
day when I'm around him and I'vehad the privilege of being able
to work close to his side forclose to the last 10 years.
So that's coming.

Speaker 2 (12:04):
I'm stoked for that one too.
All right, we'll see you on thenext one.

Speaker 1 (12:10):
See y'all, see y'all you.