January 20, 2026 • 48 mins
Clutter in midlife affects more than your home—it impacts stress, mental health, and how you show up for your next chapter.
In this episode of Asking for a Friend, Michele Folan is joined by Tracy Hoth, a professional organizer with 17 years of experience, a science-based life coach, and host of the Organized Coach Podcast.
Together, they explore why clutter feels heavier in midlife—and why it’s not just about “too much stuff.” As hormones shift and life transitions pile up, postponed decisions, emotional attachments, and changing identities can quietly increase stress, overwhelm, and decision fatigue.
This conversation dives into:
- How clutter impacts cortisol, mental health, and energy levels
- Why women feel clutter-related stress more deeply in midlife
- Empty nesting, downsizing, and merging households
- Letting go of kids’ belongings and family items without guilt
- Why your children don’t want your stuff—and how to release it anyway
- Navigating different clutter tolerances in relationships
- Simple, realistic ways to start decluttering without perfection or overwhelm
This episode is not about Pinterest pantries or minimalism for the sake of aesthetics. It’s about clarity, freedom, and creating physical and emotional space for the life you want to live next.
If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed in your own home but couldn’t quite explain why—this conversation will resonate.
You can find Tracy Hoth at: https://simplysquaredaway.com/
Podcast: https://simplysquaredaway.com/podcast/
Instagram: https://instagram.com/tracyhoth
Get the 15-minuteDeclutterChallenge:
http://simplysquaredaway.com/declutter
_________________________________________
If you’re doing “all the right things” and still feel stuck, adding a layer of support may be an option. I’ve partnered with a trusted telehealth platform offering modern solutions for women in midlife—including micro-dosed GLP-1 and other peptide therapies.
https://elliemd.com/michelefolan - Create a free account to view all products.
Follow us on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/askingforafriend_pod/
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Like to connect? Email me at askingforafriendpodcast1@gmail.com
Transcripts are created with AI and may not be perfectly accurate.
Disclaimer: This podcast is for general informational purposes only and does not constitute the practice of medicine, nursing, or other professional healthcare services. It is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your qualified healthcare provider with any questions regarding a medical condition.
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Michele Folan (00:00):
I want to take a minute to talk to the woman
who's doing everything right.
You're eating well, you'relifting weights, you're walking,
managing stress, and trying tosleep, and yet your body isn't
responding the way it used to.
I see this every single day asa coach, and I've lived it
myself.
And here's what I want you tohear clearly.
(00:21):
There is no failure here.
Midlife physiology isdifferent.
Hormones shift, metabolismadapts, inflammation and muscle
loss become real obstacles, evenwhen your habits are solid.
That's why I went looking foranswers, not shortcuts.
After a lot of research,conversations with physicians,
(00:42):
and personal experience, I choseto partner with a medical team
that offers physician-prescribedpeptides as an adjunct to a
healthy lifestyle, not areplacement for it.
Peptides aren't magic, theydon't override poor habits.
But when used appropriately andmedically supervised, they can
help support things likemetabolic health, recovery, body
(01:05):
composition, and overallvitality, especially when
lifestyle alone isn't moving theneedle anymore.
If you're curious, if you wantreal information, not hype, and
you want to explore whether thisextra layer of support makes
sense for your body, I've madethat resource available.
You'll find the link in theshow notes.
(01:25):
No pressure, no shame, justoptions for the long game.
Health, wellness, fitness, andeverything in between, we're
removing the taboo from whatreally matters in midlife.
I'm your host, Michele Folan,and this is Asking for a Friend.
(01:48):
If you're a woman in midlifeand feel overwhelmed in your own
home, but you can't quiteexplain why, this conversation
is for you.
Because clutter isn't justabout too much stuff, it's about
postponed decisions, unfinishedchapters, and the emotional
weight of holding on to lifethat no longer fits.
(02:11):
Today's guest understands thisdeeply.
Tracy Hoth is a professionalorganizer with 17 years of
experience helping women bringorder to their homes, but more
importantly, clarity to theirlives.
She's also a science-based lifecoach and the host of the
Organized Coach podcast, whereshe helps women in the second
(02:31):
half of life downsize withpurpose, release the overwhelm,
and step into a calmer, moreconfident identity.
In this episode, we're talkingabout the real cost of clutter,
how it impacts mental health,relationships, decision making,
and even how fully we show upfor this next chapter.
We'll dig into empty nesting,downsizing, merging households,
(02:54):
why our kids don't want ourstuff, and how to keep memories
without drowning in them.
This is not about perfection orPinterest pantries.
It's about freedom and finallycreating space physically and
emotionally for what's next.
Tracy Hoth, welcome to Askingfor a Friend.
Tracy Hoth (03:13):
Wow, Michele, that was the best introduction ever.
Michele Folan (03:16):
Oh, well, thank you.
You know, I I mean, I do usechat sometimes, but I've tried
not to lean on it too much,Tracy.
And I don't know, you know,because you you're in the same
business I am.
I noticed that if I use chattoo much, my brain starts to not
(03:37):
work.
Tracy Hoth (03:37):
I'm like, what would I do without it?
I don't know.
But I mean, we can think thatabout anything, right?
What would we do without ourphones?
Yeah.
Getting information, findingthe answers to questions that we
have within seconds.
Michele Folan (03:49):
I know.
And so I just don't want mybrain to come, you know, become
mush.
Yeah.
So that's why I don't lean onchat too, too much.
And I like writing.
I've told other guests this.
I like to write.
It's just that it's the timething, right?
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Yes.
Yeah.
Michele Folan (04:07):
All right.
All right, let's dig in here.
Tracy Hoth, you have an originstory.
I know everybody's got a goodstory.
So kind of take us back.
How did you first get intoprofessional organizing?
Tracy Hoth (04:21):
Well, I stayed home with my four kids, and I loved
going and doing things withthem, going to parks and going
to play dates, and I would askfriends.
And I had lots of friends thatstayed home.
We were kind of all in the samesituation, but we loved to do
stuff.
But I would hear friends say,no, no, I have things to do.
I have to organize my house orclean up or whatever.
(04:42):
And then another friend, myyoungest child's best friend,
her mom wouldn't let anybody intheir house.
And I hadn't been aroundsomeone that didn't let people
in their home.
And I remember when my youngestwas starting school, I had even
known before that that I wantto help people organize.
And I just started.
(05:03):
I made a website, I gotbusiness cards, and then I
started helping that friend.
And I just said, hey, let mecome in.
I will help you go through eacharea and learned a lot with
that.
And then started gettingclients.
I started speaking on the topicof organizing and productivity.
And it just went from there.
And I would go in lots of homesand offices and get really wore
(05:27):
out.
And I said, I am not going tocontinue doing this forever.
So I started looking for what Ikind of wanted to do going
forward.
And I love coaching people.
I found coaching in 2017 andgot certified in 2018 and
realized this is the missingpart.
I was not into self-help.
(05:47):
I was not into the mindset atall when I was doing it in
person.
And when I combine the mindset,our thoughts, the science part
of it with the tools that I hadlearned and developed, it is
magical.
Like that is what will makechange.
That's what gets people totheir goals.
So now I help people online.
Michele Folan (06:08):
So I gotta say this because first of all, the
and I you're not gonna throwanyone under the bus, but that
for the friend who wasn't reallyexcited about letting people in
her house, how bad was it?
Like I'm sure you've seenworse.
Tracy Hoth (06:25):
Yeah, I've seen worse.
She is very neat, very tidy asfar as like, and this is what I
find that you just get behind.
And then you have piles ofstuff and you don't know where
to put them because there'spiles of stuff places.
So it wasn't like hoarder, itwasn't dirty in the sense there
(06:46):
was food anywhere.
She was just very particularand, you know, folded clothes a
certain way and kept plant, youknow, like little leaves and
just was just such a sweet,caring person that she had just
gotten behind, I think.
And if she was donatingsomething, and maybe some of
your listeners can relate, youwant to donate the whole set, or
(07:08):
you want to donate everythingwashed and cleaned.
And so you put that more workon yourself to find the perfect
set, and you have half sets allover of toys and stuff, and it
just became too much.
Michele Folan (07:22):
And then it sits in the back of your car for six
months.
As you drive past the donationcenter three times a week, it's
just a matter of pulling in.
I have stuff in the back of mycar right now, by the way.
So I'm I'm I'm speaking fromexperience on that one.
And the reason I ask you thatabout how bad was it?
Because I think this is notuncommon that women get behind
(07:47):
and they feel like my houseisn't worthy to have people over
or to entertain.
And that has to be to me a veryfrustrating feeling, but almost
feeling like you're in a Idon't want to say a prison, but
you're kind of captive in yourhome.
Tracy Hoth (08:06):
Yeah, and in your life, then because you're not
doing the things you want to doand having the people in, and
you can't seem to get to thepoint.
But I think a lot of this comesback to the pictures that are
posted on the internet, onInstagram, on Pinterest are so
over the top, beautiful with thelighting and the rainbow colors
(08:28):
and everything is perfection.
And so I always like to remindpeople that being organized is
just knowing what you have andbeing able to find it when you
need it.
So it's not, it doesn't meanthat it looks like that.
It doesn't need to look likethat.
You just need to know what youhave and be able to find it.
And so I am way more down toearth.
(08:49):
Like I just want us to have alife where we can find what we
need and we can enjoy our homes.
What surprised you most aboutworking with women in their
homes?
Well, I think that people weresurprised that they thought
their house was the worst.
Like they think that they'realone in their struggles.
(09:10):
And having been in so manypeople's homes and seen all of
it, I think a lot of a lot morepeople are messier, I guess, is
what the word would be than whatyou see in the inner on the
internet.
Or when you go to that oneperson who opened their home
who's just completely got it alltogether, or even they smashed
(09:34):
everything behind the door.
So you don't see that.
They are also struggling withclutter, but it's all behind
closed doors.
So you assume that their houseis perfect and they're so
organized, and they're like, no.
I mean, I've had people call meand I walk in and I'm like, you
don't need me.
And they're like, oh, wait, letme open this closet door, and
(09:54):
things come tumbling out of it.
Oh, yeah.
So they're just good stuffers.
Michele Folan (09:59):
When my mom passed away, and I may have told
this story on another podcast.
So if people have heard itbefore, I apologize, but my
mom's place was neat as a pin,nothing was out of place until
you looked under sofas andchairs.
She had so many books you wouldnot believe.
(10:20):
And she never got rid of any ofthem.
And they were just tucked undersofas and things.
So it's funny because youreally don't know what you don't
see.
Tracy Hoth (10:29):
Yeah.
Right.
Right.
And then you feel worse aboutyour own space because what you
see in someone else's is sobeautiful and you think you're
the worst.
So I think that's whatsurprises me the most is people
don't realize how normal theyare.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And it's okay.
And they can make change.
Michele Folan (10:46):
Yeah.
And I you're making a greatpoint there is that if we have
that realization, thatself-awareness, then we can
change.
We can, we can move forwardwith different habits.
My question then would be fromyour experience, how does
chronic clutter affect mentalhealth and stress levels then?
Tracy Hoth (11:09):
Oh, yeah.
There's studies done.
And what's so interesting, mysister just sent me this study
last night, but that when womenjust think about clutter, their
cortisol levels rise.
And so imagine a steady ris toohigh, what's the right word,
level of cortisol in your bodyand what that does to your
(11:31):
health.
And they said they've studiedthe brain and they see that
women think about it and theircortisol levels rise and men
don't.
And so this article that mysister sent me was just talking
about why is that?
Is it just because women feelthat the home is their
responsibility still only, orthat that's put upon them and
that's why they think that?
(11:51):
And so when they see that, alot of it also has to do with
our tolerance of clutter, whatour level of tolerance is.
So I think that if you had,there's men that have a lower
tolerance for clutter becausecouples have called like we need
help, and it's the man thatcan't stand the mess and the
clutter.
And so he's calling.
(12:12):
I bet his level rises as wellas a woman.
So it's whoever is kind ofresponsible or wants it to be
better.
Michele Folan (12:20):
And it seems like this becomes more charged in
midlife.
Is it because we have morestuff at that point in life?
Tracy Hoth (12:29):
I think transitions always affect clutter.
And so I look at transitions inpeople's lives, and having a
baby affects people because nowall of a sudden they have so
much more stuff.
So they get behind, they havemore laundry, they have more
responsibilities, or movingaffects people, or their
parents' death and they'reinheriting things.
(12:50):
So all, or like a depression ordivorce affects it.
So all those things, andmidlife is one of those where
your role is changing and yourkids that you focused on are
leaving.
And now what?
Or you're moving, you'rewanting to move now, you're
cleaning up spaces that youhaven't had time to think about
(13:12):
previously.
So it's that transition.
Michele Folan (13:14):
The cortisol thing is really interesting
because we do talk aboutcortisol a lot, just being a
health coach and and the factthat in midlife anyway, we tend
to have more cortisol because asestrogen levels decline, our
cortisol naturally increases.
So, you know, and we needcortisol.
(13:35):
It's our flight or fighthormone, but too much of it is
you know a bad thing.
So I'm I'm wondering then howliving in constant chaos, or
let's say visual chaos, how thatimpacts our nervous system and
our energy and decision making.
(13:57):
And how about procrastination?
What have you seen?
Tracy Hoth (14:01):
Well, yeah, you pile all that stuff on top of each
other.
And that's why these women arelike, I can't do it.
I don't know what to do.
It's too much, it'soverwhelming.
And then they freeze becausethey don't know what to do.
And they also think ofthemselves now because they're
looking at all this clutter.
Maybe they've thought ofthemselves since childhood, some
(14:23):
of them have, but they think ofthemselves as disorganized
people now, and they have thevisual proof to support that
thought, and that just becomesingrained in them.
And then we don't outperformour own identity, like our own
thoughts about ourselves.
So you're kind of stuck in thisspot and you don't know what to
(14:44):
do.
Michele Folan (14:45):
You probably don't know where to start.
You know, things get to acertain level and you're
probably you just throw yourhands up.
Tracy Hoth (14:52):
Yeah.
And then you think about anddramatize how long it's gonna
take because it seems like it'sgonna take a long time.
And I've had these, I'm doingthese 15-minute declutter
sessions.
And when people see, oh my, shedid that in 15 minutes, a whole
entire junk drawer, less than15 minutes, and talking the
(15:13):
whole time, then all of a suddenthey're like, maybe it is
possible.
And they pick a space and theytry it and they realize I've
made this out to be such a bigdeal, or I just didn't know what
to do.
And I've let it sit there fortwo years.
I've had people say, Tracy, Iput this off for two years.
(15:35):
And it literally, I could havestarted in 15 minutes.
Well, and just so we make itseem like it's gonna take so
much longer.
When if we would just startwith 15 minutes, we could make
progress.
Michele Folan (15:49):
I was thinking, put on a good podcast like your
podcast or my podcast.
And then like, like just say,okay, I'm not, I can't stop
cleaning out drawers until thepodcast is over.
Tracy Hoth (16:02):
Yes, yes, designate a time.
I think a lot of times too,just the practical step of
putting it on the calendar.
And I was even talking to acolleague who wasn't making the
calls to connect with possibleleads.
And the thing that was stoppingher was that she got to that
appointment on her calendarbecause she did have an
(16:22):
appointment, but she got to thatpoint and then she was like,
now who should I call?
And she would start looking forwho she would was to call.
So I said, no, you need anappointment on Monday where you
have the names that you're gonnado on Tuesday written in the
calendar.
So when you get thatappointment on Tuesday, you know
exactly what you're gonna do.
And so that's what I think withorganizing too.
(16:44):
You're gonna decide your spaceand you're gonna put an
appointment on the calendar withthe space written in it.
And when that time comes, nowyou have it on the calendar and
you know exactly what to do andyou follow my five steps, and
then you know that you makeprogress.
Michele Folan (17:01):
I love that.
Tracy, we're gonna take a quickbreak, and when we come back, I
want to talk a little bit aboutidentity, beliefs, and changes
in midlife.
Quick pause because if you'rehere, you already know this
isn't just a health podcast.
Yes, we talk about nutrition,strength, and taking care of
(17:22):
your body in midlife, but wealso talk about life,
relationships, energy,boundaries, and what really
matters in this season.
This isn't about perfection orshrinking yourself.
It's about staying strong,curious, connected, and actually
enjoying the years ahead.
If this resonates, share theepisode with a friend who'd
(17:44):
appreciate the conversation andfollow us on Instagram at asking
for a friend underscore pod.
Okay, we are back.
You talk about stepping into anorganized identity.
What does that mean?
Tracy Hoth (18:01):
So, like I said, we don't outperform our identity.
So, whatever we think aboutourselves.
So, if we want to produce theresult of having an organized
home, we need to think ofourselves as organized people or
as an organized person.
So, an example of one of myclients, she could find evidence
(18:21):
that she was organized.
So, we talked about like whereelse are you organized?
And she found it in the way sheplanned vacations.
She found it in her job thatshe had had.
She was very organized in allthose places, just not in her
house.
And that stemmed from, and Idon't know, it's it could be
helpful for you to rememberwhere that's from, but you now
(18:45):
have proof and that you are anorganized person.
So the goal then is to rememberwhat you think in that
situation.
What do you think aboutyourself?
I love planning vacations.
I'm very detail-oriented, I canmake good decisions.
It's super fun to get theresult.
And then you take thosethoughts into your thoughts
(19:07):
about being an organized personin your home and you start
adding evidence to that.
Every 15 minutes, you can addmore evidence.
Look, I know how to sort.
Sorting is easy.
It's putting like things withlike things.
You're gonna get better andbetter at sorting.
I'm really good at sorting.
And so you just keep adding theevidence to it.
(19:28):
And now all of a sudden, youhave an identity of an organized
person.
And because of that, you willcreate.
It's inevitable that you willcreate an organized home.
Michele Folan (19:38):
Well, so what you're saying is you're not
allowing people to say, Well,I'm just not organized.
I just I've never beenorganized.
So you're creating exampleswhere they have been organized.
Okay, I get it.
Tracy Hoth (19:50):
Yes, yes, because if they say that, that's what
they'll create.
And we don't want that.
That's what has not worked forthem all these years.
Yeah, that's a self fulfilling.
In prophecy.
Michele Folan (20:01):
Yeah.
Many of my friends, and I'msure many of our listeners here
are starting to do the emptynesting, the downsizing.
And there is this emotionalattachment to things as kids
leave the nest, right?
Why is it so difficult to letgo of kids' belongings, even
(20:27):
when we logically know it'stime?
Tracy Hoth (20:31):
One of the things when you were saying that was
what does emotionally attachedmean?
Now, I know what we mean whenwe say it, but I like to define
words and thoughts that we have.
So if I say I'm emotionallyattached to that, what exactly
does it mean?
And this is just out ofcuriosity, when we say it, what
(20:53):
does it mean?
Because we can look atemotionally attached, we can
look at the word attached, likeyou're really not attached to
it.
We can start to separate theactual physical object.
But I think it's even easier tosay, okay, going forward, where
am I going?
What do I want my house to looklike?
What do I want to do for mykids?
(21:16):
Like, do I want to give them 14tubs of things that I claimed I
was emotionally attached to?
And then have to have them makedecisions.
Because I've been with peoplewhose parents have dropped off
some stuff for them and they areso mad at them because they're
the ones that kept all thatstuff for them.
So there's so many angles tolook at it, but I think knowing
(21:38):
where you're going is helpful.
And then really breaking itdown like what is emotionally
attachment mean in your mind,because it might not mean
exactly as dramatic as we thinkit is.
And then the other thing ischoosing your favorites.
When you don't have a favoriteor a couple favorites, then
(22:00):
nothing is special.
Nothing is your favoritebecause you have all those
things.
So it can't really be yourfavorite.
So choosing a couple thingsthat are your favorites first is
really helpful.
And then looking at the rest ofthe stuff.
Okay, well, what do I do I wantto replace one of my favorites
with this other object?
No, that's not really asspecial.
(22:21):
And then we can, it helps makethe decisions a little bit
easier when you're looking atthings like that.
And how am I going to honorthat?
Where am I going to put itversus it's just shoved in a box
somewhere?
Michele Folan (22:33):
You're way nicer than I am.
I would probably say you get topick three things.
Three things.
And then that's it.
And then you know, becausewell, we don't need to talk
about my issues, but I am I hateclutter.
Tracy Hoth (22:47):
Yeah.
So you're the opposite, you'rethe one that throws it away and
everyone's hiding it from you sothat they don't get their stuff
taken.
Michele Folan (22:54):
Yeah, pretty much.
So I but but I have these bins,and I know I'm not the only
one, so I'm gonna say this.
I have these bins in thebasement with my daughter's
artwork and baby blankets andmementos from their first
communion and you know, all ofthat stuff.
And I have on multipleoccasions said, Here, take your
(23:18):
bins, take your bins.
And my daughter's like, Oh, andthey they gaslight me and they
say, Oh, but don't you want thatstuff?
Like, no, you both own houses,you can take your stuff, right?
So I think there's also thattug of war with your kids where
(23:39):
you want them to take theirmementos and their artwork
because I think that's stuffthat I feel like they would want
to share with their futurechildren.
Right.
You know, who am I gonna sharethat stuff with?
Tracy Hoth (23:51):
Right.
And they're gonna get iteventually anyway.
But that's like a fun activityto pull it out one time and just
laugh through it together andmake decisions together,
possibly.
But yes, again, of that tub,what would be the things that
you would want to keep foryourself?
And there's so many fun thingsto do, like with the artwork,
(24:13):
you could send it in to the artcompany that makes a book.
They like scan all that in andmake a book.
But do you want to spend moneyon that when the kid doesn't
even care anyway and doesn'twant the things?
Michele Folan (24:24):
I think they want them eventually.
They just want me to like keepit for store them.
Yeah.
I'm bringing this up onlybecause I know I am not the only
one out there that is asdealing with this.
Oh, 100%.
And then you like, what's youradvice when kids feel hurt that
they no longer have their roomin the downsized home?
Tracy Hoth (24:46):
Oh.
There's where I'm more likeyou.
I'm like, well, what do youexpect?
You're not living here anymore.
You have your own room at yourplace.
It's funny because I, when akid moves out, even if they're
just going away to college, I'lllike clean out the whole room.
Or when they I guess it's not,it's when they got their first
(25:07):
apartment.
I clean out the whole room likethe next day.
But I tell them, put everythingthat you want to keep in a bin,
or I'll ask them, send photosif they haven't done it and put
stuff in they they each haveprobably one or two memory bins
that I will give to them.
None of mine have a house yet,so I'm a little behind you.
And then I will drive it overthere and drop it off.
(25:29):
But and then they can gothrough it.
Then they can go through andget rid of whatever they want.
All right, here's the otherone.
Michele Folan (25:36):
Uh a friend of mine is downsizing, they're
going from two homes to one, andthey've got a ton of stuff.
And many times we find that ourkids don't want our stuff.
Tastes have changed.
You know, we we have all thechina and the crystal and all
that stuff we registered forwhen we got married in 1990.
(25:59):
And our kids don't want it.
And I think sometimes there'ssome hurt feelings there where
you're like, well, what do youmean you don't want grandma's
China?
Tracy Hoth (26:11):
Yeah.
That could be the baseline isthat they don't want it.
Don't expect that your kidswant anything.
They have so much stuff, theyhave access to so much more than
we had.
And just expect that they'renot gonna want anything.
And if they do, that's just anice bonus.
But I like just communicating,text them and ask them, what of
(26:31):
these things do you want?
Is there anything in this room?
I'm cleaning it out.
Is there anything you'd want?
And just see.
Michele Folan (26:40):
Yeah.
I think it it can be superchallenging.
We're seeing more and morepeople go from two homes to one.
I know, you know, people are,yeah, they they had the vacation
home in Florida or whatever,and now they're like, uh, this
is getting a lot.
Let's just, you know, downsize.
What challenges do you see comeup the most with people that
are trying to make it to onehome?
Tracy Hoth (27:02):
Well, the big part of that that came up when you
were saying that was somebodywants it.
So if it's not your kids, justrealize someone wants it and
they need it.
And maybe that feels betterthan feeling hurt that our kids
don't want it, is that someonereally wants it and needs it.
And so it's just your job tofind who needs it and wants it,
(27:25):
which I don't think is that hardwhen you call a church or call
a community or call a charitythat you love and you want to
support.
They have a resale shop and youcan support them, and it's such
a beautiful thing.
I even think dropping it off atthe regular charity, there's
people that go there to make aliving by buying stuff and
(27:48):
reselling it.
And just to realize you aresupporting people by donating
your things all over in any ofthe places you could choose.
Yeah.
Michele Folan (27:59):
Oh, I I I agree.
I wanna, and I think that's agreat point, by the way, because
I know it's sometimes thehardest thing is when you're
giving away your great aunt'sChina to a total stranger.
And I know that can that canfeel really odd sometimes.
So yeah.
I want to go back to thecouples thing where you have
(28:24):
couples trying to navigate,let's say, different clutter
tolerances.
How do we navigate that withoutdamaging the relationship?
Because I know this can beproblematic for couples where
one is super neat and the otherone is not.
Tracy Hoth (28:43):
I think one of the helpful things you can do is
define on a zone where clutterisn't allowed or where you
you've agreed on it.
So maybe the main level of yourhouse, and then the clutter
person gets to have the areasthat they want to have the
clutter.
And another thing I just workedon with someone today was they
(29:07):
spend a lot of energy gettingupset because people leave stuff
out, even though she's labeledbins and knows where things go.
But the fact that people aren'tputting it away in the correct
spot is giving her a lot ofspinning in emotion.
And like it's taking a lot ofenergy.
And so one of the things wetalked about was you're really
(29:28):
great at it.
You could put stuff away infive minutes.
Why don't you own that insteadof spending the energy and the
time thinking someone elseshould do it like you or as good
as you or just do it, period.
And then you own it.
You sweep through the house andput everything away in 10
minutes.
Like you could be so fast atthat and spend 10 minutes versus
(29:51):
three hours or two weeks beingmad about it.
Michele Folan (29:54):
Oh, yeah.
I mean, we can be mad, we cancarry that stuff with us for
days, days and days.
I like your first suggestionbecause does anyone else have
this happen where you're gettingready to make dinner, your
husband comes home from work andthrows all his shit all over
the counter?
Glasses, sunglasses, keys,wallet, whatever else is in his
(30:19):
pockets, right it right whereI'm cooking.
And I'm going, you know what?
And he he's like, Why are youmoving my stuff?
Because you put it right in themiddle of the kitchen, but I'm
the one that hates clutter.
So I tuck it back into his hislittle corner in the kitchen
where I can't really see it toomuch.
Tracy Hoth (30:39):
So he does have a designated place for it.
Kinda, yeah.
He just walks in and puts itdown.
Yeah.
I think another big thing is toget buy-in from the other
people.
Like, do they want their stuffin that back spot?
Is it better to have a bowl onthe way to the kitchen where you
could drop it?
Like an easier place to drop itis to get the buy-in from them.
(31:02):
Ooh.
And just say, where would youwant it to be?
unknown (31:07):
Yeah.
Michele Folan (31:07):
Tracy, you're giving me all these ideas.
I mean, I find a cute bowl toput on the counter right inside
the door where he can just puthis stuff.
Tracy Hoth (31:16):
Yeah, because I think if it's easy, we'll do it.
It makes it so much better.
But also, not that if you thinkit's easy, but he does and he's
willing to try.
I think we can always ask andrequest, but then not to spend
more energy than if we were tojust do it ourselves.
Michele Folan (31:36):
Yeah.
All right.
I have a friend who picks upher mail and it goes on the
dining room table.
So the dining room tableessentially for the whole time
she's lived in this house, hasbeen basically the mail catcher.
And I'm like, why do you dothat?
Why don't you just take yourmail over to the kitchen garbage
(31:58):
can?
Because you know two-thirds ofit is garbage anyway, and just
throw it out that way, and thenput your bills in a basket.
And she just looking at me.
I said, Well, I'm just tryingto help you out here because
every time I come over, you'vegot this huge pile of mail.
Like, when do you go throughthat?
(32:18):
I said, That would be morestressful to me.
So, what other tips and tricksdo you have for people that are
struggling?
Tracy Hoth (32:26):
Well, and then what happens is those people that
have those piles put it all in abag when company's gonna come
and shove it in the closet.
And then, you know, they have14 bags of stuff they have to go
through, is what happens a lot.
But with paper, I first of all,you always want to reduce what
you're bringing in.
So there is some resources toreduce that, going paperless,
(32:47):
getting on a no send, you know,credit offers to me list.
So there's that.
And then there's also, I liketo think of paper as a flow,
like river, like a river.
So it's coming into your housefrom different sources, and then
it's flowing.
Where is it gonna flow throughthe house?
So hers obviously flows to thedining room table.
(33:10):
Where how can she change that?
Like you said, where is therecycle bin?
Where is something easy so thatit's on the way, that the river
travels?
And then noticing where thewhere the dam happens, where the
things get backed up and thenthere's damage or it's
overwhelming because you haven'tdone it in so long.
(33:30):
And then where does it gotemporarily?
Where does it go permanently?
And then how does it flow outof your house?
So just to at least have thatthought through and have a
process in place.
And then you just startpracticing a little part of it
at a time.
Like get really good atthrowing away junk mail before
you set it down.
And then the next month, getreally good at deciding, making
(33:54):
decisions earlier, or schedulinga time when you're gonna
process those bills or thingsthat take action.
Oh, here's another one I justthought of.
Ooh, you're you're having allthe examples.
Michele Folan (34:07):
I know.
And none of these are on mylist of questions I was gonna
ask you, but so hopefully Idon't surprise you too much.
I think there is electronicclutter that really impedes
people.
And I'm talking email and thatsort of thing.
What's a good strategy to getthrough an email inbox that is
(34:29):
out of control?
Tracy Hoth (34:31):
Yeah.
Well, again, I like to start byreducing what's coming in.
So unsubscribing, justintensely unsubscribing from
things so that you're notgetting that many emails.
Again, here's the thing (34:47):
if you know where it is and you can
find it when you need it, having20,000 emails isn't necessarily
a problem.
If you can search your emailand you can find it, then it's
not a problem.
Now, if you notice that's aproblem and you don't want to
experience that, then you couldjust take all of them and put
(35:09):
them in an archive folder andthen start fresh and start
really being disciplined onunsubscribing and deleting
emails.
And then again, to have asystem.
So when there's an email thatrequires action from you, what
happens?
Is there a time set aside whenyou do it?
Is there a folder you could putin it?
And that's the action folderthat you would go to when you
(35:32):
have your appointment to processemails.
So again, it's it's like withorganizing, if it's not a
problem, don't focus on it.
If you can find what you needand you know what you have, if
it is a problem, then it needsto be treated like a project
where you schedule it.
I'm gonna have a start date andan end date.
(35:52):
And this is my plan to getthrough the project.
And I'm gonna schedule that soI get it done.
And then it's like freedombecause you've intensely focused
on something and now it's doneversus it's just endless.
Email's gonna go on forever,you know.
Yeah, I've made 15 email, I'vedeleted 15 and I have 20,000.
(36:15):
You know, it just seemsendless.
So going all in on a projectand and looking at it that way,
I think is really helpful.
Michele Folan (36:23):
Back when I was working in corporate world, I
would at times go to my email,and if it's something that is
three months or older, I wouldjust go in and delete it.
Yeah.
Talk about freeing your soul.
Tracy Hoth (36:38):
Yes.
You know, and you know, kind ofnowadays, if someone needs
something, they're gonna emailyou again.
Exactly.
Or they're gonna reach out toyou.
So it's not like most thingsare super important or
detrimental if you deleted it.
Michele Folan (36:53):
Do you ever recommend that people get a
storage unit?
Tracy Hoth (36:57):
Well, I think about what's the purpose because that
storage unit, once you get it,it it doesn't go away easily.
Pretty much is really hard toever get rid of it if it's just
for a regular purpose.
Okay.
So, no, I don't recommendunless it's for a purpose like
we're moving and we're in anapartment for one year and you
(37:19):
know, or we're having a housebuilt or, you know, something
like that where you need it.
All right.
I had to ask that.
Michele Folan (37:25):
I didn't know if that was kind of like a stopgap
for someone that just had to gettheir house cleared out and it
gave them an opportunity to haveall the stuff in one place
where they could then start togo through it.
Tracy Hoth (37:37):
Yeah, the problem with that, I mean, that sounds
exciting because they could geteverything out of their house,
but I think it doesn't take awaythe fact that you're still
gonna have to make decisions andnow everything's piled on top
of everything else.
And how are you gonna sort anyof that?
So it just makes it morechallenging.
Michele Folan (37:56):
All right.
And then what does it trulymean to leave a mess-free legacy
for our children?
Tracy Hoth (38:03):
I think having decided where you're going and
making sure everything that youkeep is stuff that supports that
life that you want.
It's stuff you love, it's stuffyou use, and that's it.
And then if something were tohappen, the legacy for your kids
(38:23):
is that they're not spending somuch time going through all
this stuff that you didn't makedecisions on.
It's stuff that you never used,you thought might have been
nice, or you spent money on it,but you never used it.
They've never didn't even knowyou had it, and now they're
having to make decisions.
It just puts a big burden onthem.
And one of my clients recentlysaid, you know, her father had
(38:46):
passed, she cared, she was acaregiver for him, and he
passed.
And she, I was asking her if Ican do anything.
And she's like, Tracy, justplease keep telling people, make
sure you go through your stuff.
It's already hard enough totake care of someone and to see
them die, and then to have to gothrough all the stuff and make
(39:07):
decisions and have so much moreburden or pressure or things on
you.
So take the time.
Now is the perfect time for youto start downsizing and making
decisions and letting go ofthings.
Michele Folan (39:21):
I think that is really, really great advice.
And I have a basement thatneeds to be gone through this
winter.
So that's my project because mydaughters have already said,
mom, don't leave us a ton ofstuff.
But because they saw us gothrough it, uh, my siblings and
me when my mom passed away.
And so I I hear that.
(39:43):
And so I I think that is greatreinforcement coming from you,
Tracy Hoth.
Tracy Hoth (39:49):
Yes.
Well, and I think too, if thinkof it as a gift to yourself.
Like this is a gift, it's aweight off your own shoulders as
you're going through thatstuff.
And if it's Easier to think ofit like if we had to move, I
want my house to haveeverything.
All I would do is pack itbecause I know everything in it
(40:10):
is stuff that I love and use.
Now I'm not there.
That's what I'll be doing inOrganized Life Academy this
year.
I am going to be going througheach room as I assign, you know,
the space for the month.
I'm going to be going throughthat the same way, but I'm
looking at it this year as Imight move.
I might want to move.
And if I do, I want my house tobe ready to stage it.
(40:30):
I want it to be staged andready to sell.
And all I have to do is packthe things that I love that I
know I'm taking with me.
Michele Folan (40:38):
See, I have a husband that is a pack rat would
be, I think, applicable.
He is a sentimental guy and hehas a lot of memory stuff.
He collections.
He was Iron Man.
So he's he got like all of hisribbons and trophy stuff and you
(41:00):
know pictures back when he wasplaying ice hockey when he was
14.
And that stuff's like superimportant to him.
But he's there's tons of itdown there in the basement.
Tracy Hoth (41:12):
Yeah.
And if it's packed up in a tuband that's his, and that's fine.
Like I notice a lot of times,like I have another couple I'm
working with, and she focuses alot on what he's not doing, and
he focuses a lot on what she'snot doing.
And I'm like, why don't y'alljust focus on yourselves?
Get your own stuff done, youknow.
(41:34):
But so I think that's kind offun.
Like once you've gone througheverything you have control over
that you would make decisionson, I think they're they'll be a
little inspired.
Michele Folan (41:45):
All right.
There is a bin, and it's a verylarge bin, Tracy, of old
electronics and cords, like oldHDMI cords and coaxial cable
kind of stuff.
Yeah.
No one's ever gonna use thatstuff again.
And men traditionally will say,Oh, we never know for if if you
(42:08):
know we'll need that forsomething.
I just think it's one of thosethey just feel overwhelmed and
they don't want to go through itjust to dig out the one or two
things in there that maybe stillbe usable because that stuff
changes and yeah, with newtechnology and everything.
Right.
So now you got a fire lit underme, and I'm I'm we're we're
(42:29):
pulling that stuff out thiswinter and we're gonna get
through it because I really dowant to get through some things.
Tracy Hoth (42:35):
Well, in that kind of stuff, I think it's gotten a
lot easier.
I've noticed families are ableto let go of things like that
more than they ever have in thepast because it's so easily
accessible.
You can go on Amazon, find anycord you want, and have it
delivered overnight.
So if you were to give awaysomething that you needed, you
(42:57):
wouldn't regret it, I'm prettysure.
And when is the last time youwent into that bin to get a
cord?
Oh, never.
So I think there's you can takethat cord to I I don't know for
sure.
You'd have to call and see, butat one point you could take
cords to recycle, like at BestBuy or Electronics to recycle
(43:20):
and just get rid of the wholething.
Don't even have to go throughit.
Michele Folan (43:23):
But I mean you might want to, but yeah, we need
we do definitely need to findhow to recycle that stuff
because I don't want that stuffin a landfill.
But all right, you are also thehost of the Organized Coach
Podcast.
What inspired you to start ashow and who is the show for
specifically?
Tracy Hoth (43:42):
Well, the organized coach podcast started back when
I was shifting a little bit andhelping more business owners get
organized.
And so a lot of it is businessfocused and it can be any
business.
It's just anyone with digitalorganization that needs help.
So I teach how to organize yourdigital files, how to organize
(44:05):
your time and your systems andall of that.
But I also, for the last sixyears, have had a side of my
business where I help women inthe later half of life organize
their home.
So I do talk a lot about homeorganization, just personal life
organization on the podcast.
So I have listeners that areboth business owners and regular
(44:27):
people, I call homeowners.
Michele Folan (44:30):
But you don't go into people's homes anymore, but
you did start that way,correct?
Tracy Hoth (44:35):
Yes, I did that for many years until finally in
2023, I was still doing it whileI had my online business.
And I decided, okay, I'm done.
Michele Folan (44:46):
Yeah.
And so when you're coachingpeople virtually, can you can
you get a pretty good sense ofwhat you're dealing with?
Tracy Hoth (44:53):
Yes, they can send pictures.
I had someone this morning justsend me pictures, and it's so
good to see actual pictures andtake videos and show me videos.
So I do a lot of that type ofthing.
And we do a lot on what's yourplan?
How's it working on yourcalendar?
What are you doing or not doingand why?
(45:14):
So we look a lot at the mindsetand what they're believing and
make shifts that they need tolet go of things.
There's just so many aspects ofcreating a clutter-free home
that you can definitely doonline.
But we make a plan, and that'stheir plan, is and we see why
they're following their plan ornot following their plan.
(45:34):
All right.
Michele Folan (45:36):
For someone listening who feels really
overwhelmed right now, what'sthe simplest place to start?
Tracy Hoth (45:43):
Well, I would say for sure, go get the 15-minute
declutter challenge.
It's at simplysquared away.comforward slash declutter.
And in that, I show you thefive steps to organizing.
They spell the word space, andyou pick one small area, you set
your timer, and you sort.
(46:04):
Whenever I'm overwhelmed, thefirst step to organizing is
always just to sort.
So as far as where to start andpicking the area, that's not as
important.
Pick the one that creates themost friction.
Pick the one that would makeyou the happiest if you had it
organized.
Pick the smallest one so youget a good win.
(46:26):
Whatever the reason is, that'snot as important as sorting.
The first thing you do in thatarea is to sort.
Because then you have like withlike, and you're not making big
decisions right in thebeginning.
You don't make those until youhave a category.
And then you can look at it andsay, again, what's my favorite?
(46:46):
What do I use all the timehere?
And then you can go to thenext, you know, other questions
after that.
Michele Folan (46:53):
All right.
Tracy Hoth, where can thelisteners find you and your
coaching?
Tracy Hoth (46:58):
Yes, my website is simply squaredaway.com and
everything is on there.
And again, the 15-minutechallenge and my podcast are
probably the best places to getto know me.
Michele Folan (47:09):
Perfect.
Tracy Hoth, thank you so much.
I'm I'm looking forward todigging into my basement this
winter and um I'll reach out andI'll let you know how it goes.
Tracy Hoth (47:19):
Yes, Michelle, isn't it fun when you talk about it?
You all of a sudden get somotivated whenever I'm working
with someone.
I'm like, I gotta get out ofhere.
I gotta go do that in my ownhouse.
Yeah.
And so it gets you, it keepsyou motivated.
That's why I think get thesupport you need to stay
motivated.
Michele Folan (47:34):
And I think it's also making promises to yourself
and keeping those promises.
Tracy Hoth (47:40):
Yeah.
Michele Folan (47:41):
Because the payoff is huge with that peace
of mind.
Tracy Hoth (47:44):
Yeah, for sure.
Michele Folan (47:46):
Thanks for being here today.
Thanks for having me, Michele.
Before you go, thank you forbeing here.
If you want to go a littledeeper, make sure you check out
the show notes for this episode.
That's where I link anything wementioned, resources, partners,
or tools I actually use andtrust.
And if you're not already onthe Asking for a Friend
(48:07):
community newsletter, that'swhere I share practical midlife
tips, favorite finds, recipes,and the things that don't always
make it onto the podcast orInstagram.
You'll find the link to join inthe show notes.
Take care, and I'll see younext week.
I want to take a minute to talk to the woman
who's doing everything right.
You're eating well, you'relifting weights, you're walking,
managing stress, and trying tosleep, and yet your body isn't
responding the way it used to.
I see this every single day asa coach, and I've lived it
myself.
And here's what I want you tohear clearly.
(00:21):
There is no failure here.
Midlife physiology isdifferent.
Hormones shift, metabolismadapts, inflammation and muscle
loss become real obstacles, evenwhen your habits are solid.
That's why I went looking foranswers, not shortcuts.
After a lot of research,conversations with physicians,
(00:42):
and personal experience, I choseto partner with a medical team
that offers physician-prescribedpeptides as an adjunct to a
healthy lifestyle, not areplacement for it.
Peptides aren't magic, theydon't override poor habits.
But when used appropriately andmedically supervised, they can
help support things likemetabolic health, recovery, body
(01:05):
composition, and overallvitality, especially when
lifestyle alone isn't moving theneedle anymore.
If you're curious, if you wantreal information, not hype, and
you want to explore whether thisextra layer of support makes
sense for your body, I've madethat resource available.
You'll find the link in theshow notes.
(01:25):
No pressure, no shame, justoptions for the long game.
Health, wellness, fitness, andeverything in between, we're
removing the taboo from whatreally matters in midlife.
I'm your host, Michele Folan,and this is Asking for a Friend.
(01:48):
If you're a woman in midlifeand feel overwhelmed in your own
home, but you can't quiteexplain why, this conversation
is for you.
Because clutter isn't justabout too much stuff, it's about
postponed decisions, unfinishedchapters, and the emotional
weight of holding on to lifethat no longer fits.
(02:11):
Today's guest understands thisdeeply.
Tracy Hoth is a professionalorganizer with 17 years of
experience helping women bringorder to their homes, but more
importantly, clarity to theirlives.
She's also a science-based lifecoach and the host of the
Organized Coach podcast, whereshe helps women in the second
(02:31):
half of life downsize withpurpose, release the overwhelm,
and step into a calmer, moreconfident identity.
In this episode, we're talkingabout the real cost of clutter,
how it impacts mental health,relationships, decision making,
and even how fully we show upfor this next chapter.
We'll dig into empty nesting,downsizing, merging households,
(02:54):
why our kids don't want ourstuff, and how to keep memories
without drowning in them.
This is not about perfection orPinterest pantries.
It's about freedom and finallycreating space physically and
emotionally for what's next.
Tracy Hoth, welcome to Askingfor a Friend.
Tracy Hoth (03:13):
Wow, Michele, that was the best introduction ever.
Michele Folan (03:16):
Oh, well, thank you.
You know, I I mean, I do usechat sometimes, but I've tried
not to lean on it too much,Tracy.
And I don't know, you know,because you you're in the same
business I am.
I noticed that if I use chattoo much, my brain starts to not
(03:37):
work.
Tracy Hoth (03:37):
I'm like, what would I do without it?
I don't know.
But I mean, we can think thatabout anything, right?
What would we do without ourphones?
Yeah.
Getting information, findingthe answers to questions that we
have within seconds.
Michele Folan (03:49):
I know.
And so I just don't want mybrain to come, you know, become
mush.
Yeah.
So that's why I don't lean onchat too, too much.
And I like writing.
I've told other guests this.
I like to write.
It's just that it's the timething, right?
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Yes.
Yeah.
Michele Folan (04:07):
All right.
All right, let's dig in here.
Tracy Hoth, you have an originstory.
I know everybody's got a goodstory.
So kind of take us back.
How did you first get intoprofessional organizing?
Tracy Hoth (04:21):
Well, I stayed home with my four kids, and I loved
going and doing things withthem, going to parks and going
to play dates, and I would askfriends.
And I had lots of friends thatstayed home.
We were kind of all in the samesituation, but we loved to do
stuff.
But I would hear friends say,no, no, I have things to do.
I have to organize my house orclean up or whatever.
(04:42):
And then another friend, myyoungest child's best friend,
her mom wouldn't let anybody intheir house.
And I hadn't been aroundsomeone that didn't let people
in their home.
And I remember when my youngestwas starting school, I had even
known before that that I wantto help people organize.
And I just started.
(05:03):
I made a website, I gotbusiness cards, and then I
started helping that friend.
And I just said, hey, let mecome in.
I will help you go through eacharea and learned a lot with
that.
And then started gettingclients.
I started speaking on the topicof organizing and productivity.
And it just went from there.
And I would go in lots of homesand offices and get really wore
(05:27):
out.
And I said, I am not going tocontinue doing this forever.
So I started looking for what Ikind of wanted to do going
forward.
And I love coaching people.
I found coaching in 2017 andgot certified in 2018 and
realized this is the missingpart.
I was not into self-help.
(05:47):
I was not into the mindset atall when I was doing it in
person.
And when I combine the mindset,our thoughts, the science part
of it with the tools that I hadlearned and developed, it is
magical.
Like that is what will makechange.
That's what gets people totheir goals.
So now I help people online.
Michele Folan (06:08):
So I gotta say this because first of all, the
and I you're not gonna throwanyone under the bus, but that
for the friend who wasn't reallyexcited about letting people in
her house, how bad was it?
Like I'm sure you've seenworse.
Tracy Hoth (06:25):
Yeah, I've seen worse.
She is very neat, very tidy asfar as like, and this is what I
find that you just get behind.
And then you have piles ofstuff and you don't know where
to put them because there'spiles of stuff places.
So it wasn't like hoarder, itwasn't dirty in the sense there
(06:46):
was food anywhere.
She was just very particularand, you know, folded clothes a
certain way and kept plant, youknow, like little leaves and
just was just such a sweet,caring person that she had just
gotten behind, I think.
And if she was donatingsomething, and maybe some of
your listeners can relate, youwant to donate the whole set, or
(07:08):
you want to donate everythingwashed and cleaned.
And so you put that more workon yourself to find the perfect
set, and you have half sets allover of toys and stuff, and it
just became too much.
Michele Folan (07:22):
And then it sits in the back of your car for six
months.
As you drive past the donationcenter three times a week, it's
just a matter of pulling in.
I have stuff in the back of mycar right now, by the way.
So I'm I'm I'm speaking fromexperience on that one.
And the reason I ask you thatabout how bad was it?
Because I think this is notuncommon that women get behind
(07:47):
and they feel like my houseisn't worthy to have people over
or to entertain.
And that has to be to me a veryfrustrating feeling, but almost
feeling like you're in a Idon't want to say a prison, but
you're kind of captive in yourhome.
Tracy Hoth (08:06):
Yeah, and in your life, then because you're not
doing the things you want to doand having the people in, and
you can't seem to get to thepoint.
But I think a lot of this comesback to the pictures that are
posted on the internet, onInstagram, on Pinterest are so
over the top, beautiful with thelighting and the rainbow colors
(08:28):
and everything is perfection.
And so I always like to remindpeople that being organized is
just knowing what you have andbeing able to find it when you
need it.
So it's not, it doesn't meanthat it looks like that.
It doesn't need to look likethat.
You just need to know what youhave and be able to find it.
And so I am way more down toearth.
(08:49):
Like I just want us to have alife where we can find what we
need and we can enjoy our homes.
What surprised you most aboutworking with women in their
homes?
Well, I think that people weresurprised that they thought
their house was the worst.
Like they think that they'realone in their struggles.
(09:10):
And having been in so manypeople's homes and seen all of
it, I think a lot of a lot morepeople are messier, I guess, is
what the word would be than whatyou see in the inner on the
internet.
Or when you go to that oneperson who opened their home
who's just completely got it alltogether, or even they smashed
(09:34):
everything behind the door.
So you don't see that.
They are also struggling withclutter, but it's all behind
closed doors.
So you assume that their houseis perfect and they're so
organized, and they're like, no.
I mean, I've had people call meand I walk in and I'm like, you
don't need me.
And they're like, oh, wait, letme open this closet door, and
(09:54):
things come tumbling out of it.
Oh, yeah.
So they're just good stuffers.
Michele Folan (09:59):
When my mom passed away, and I may have told
this story on another podcast.
So if people have heard itbefore, I apologize, but my
mom's place was neat as a pin,nothing was out of place until
you looked under sofas andchairs.
She had so many books you wouldnot believe.
(10:20):
And she never got rid of any ofthem.
And they were just tucked undersofas and things.
So it's funny because youreally don't know what you don't
see.
Tracy Hoth (10:29):
Yeah.
Right.
Right.
And then you feel worse aboutyour own space because what you
see in someone else's is sobeautiful and you think you're
the worst.
So I think that's whatsurprises me the most is people
don't realize how normal theyare.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And it's okay.
And they can make change.
Michele Folan (10:46):
Yeah.
And I you're making a greatpoint there is that if we have
that realization, thatself-awareness, then we can
change.
We can, we can move forwardwith different habits.
My question then would be fromyour experience, how does
chronic clutter affect mentalhealth and stress levels then?
Tracy Hoth (11:09):
Oh, yeah.
There's studies done.
And what's so interesting, mysister just sent me this study
last night, but that when womenjust think about clutter, their
cortisol levels rise.
And so imagine a steady ris toohigh, what's the right word,
level of cortisol in your bodyand what that does to your
(11:31):
health.
And they said they've studiedthe brain and they see that
women think about it and theircortisol levels rise and men
don't.
And so this article that mysister sent me was just talking
about why is that?
Is it just because women feelthat the home is their
responsibility still only, orthat that's put upon them and
that's why they think that?
(11:51):
And so when they see that, alot of it also has to do with
our tolerance of clutter, whatour level of tolerance is.
So I think that if you had,there's men that have a lower
tolerance for clutter becausecouples have called like we need
help, and it's the man thatcan't stand the mess and the
clutter.
And so he's calling.
(12:12):
I bet his level rises as wellas a woman.
So it's whoever is kind ofresponsible or wants it to be
better.
Michele Folan (12:20):
And it seems like this becomes more charged in
midlife.
Is it because we have morestuff at that point in life?
Tracy Hoth (12:29):
I think transitions always affect clutter.
And so I look at transitions inpeople's lives, and having a
baby affects people because nowall of a sudden they have so
much more stuff.
So they get behind, they havemore laundry, they have more
responsibilities, or movingaffects people, or their
parents' death and they'reinheriting things.
(12:50):
So all, or like a depression ordivorce affects it.
So all those things, andmidlife is one of those where
your role is changing and yourkids that you focused on are
leaving.
And now what?
Or you're moving, you'rewanting to move now, you're
cleaning up spaces that youhaven't had time to think about
(13:12):
previously.
So it's that transition.
Michele Folan (13:14):
The cortisol thing is really interesting
because we do talk aboutcortisol a lot, just being a
health coach and and the factthat in midlife anyway, we tend
to have more cortisol because asestrogen levels decline, our
cortisol naturally increases.
So, you know, and we needcortisol.
(13:35):
It's our flight or fighthormone, but too much of it is
you know a bad thing.
So I'm I'm wondering then howliving in constant chaos, or
let's say visual chaos, how thatimpacts our nervous system and
our energy and decision making.
(13:57):
And how about procrastination?
What have you seen?
Tracy Hoth (14:01):
Well, yeah, you pile all that stuff on top of each
other.
And that's why these women arelike, I can't do it.
I don't know what to do.
It's too much, it'soverwhelming.
And then they freeze becausethey don't know what to do.
And they also think ofthemselves now because they're
looking at all this clutter.
Maybe they've thought ofthemselves since childhood, some
(14:23):
of them have, but they think ofthemselves as disorganized
people now, and they have thevisual proof to support that
thought, and that just becomesingrained in them.
And then we don't outperformour own identity, like our own
thoughts about ourselves.
So you're kind of stuck in thisspot and you don't know what to
(14:44):
do.
Michele Folan (14:45):
You probably don't know where to start.
You know, things get to acertain level and you're
probably you just throw yourhands up.
Tracy Hoth (14:52):
Yeah.
And then you think about anddramatize how long it's gonna
take because it seems like it'sgonna take a long time.
And I've had these, I'm doingthese 15-minute declutter
sessions.
And when people see, oh my, shedid that in 15 minutes, a whole
entire junk drawer, less than15 minutes, and talking the
(15:13):
whole time, then all of a suddenthey're like, maybe it is
possible.
And they pick a space and theytry it and they realize I've
made this out to be such a bigdeal, or I just didn't know what
to do.
And I've let it sit there fortwo years.
I've had people say, Tracy, Iput this off for two years.
(15:35):
And it literally, I could havestarted in 15 minutes.
Well, and just so we make itseem like it's gonna take so
much longer.
When if we would just startwith 15 minutes, we could make
progress.
Michele Folan (15:49):
I was thinking, put on a good podcast like your
podcast or my podcast.
And then like, like just say,okay, I'm not, I can't stop
cleaning out drawers until thepodcast is over.
Tracy Hoth (16:02):
Yes, yes, designate a time.
I think a lot of times too,just the practical step of
putting it on the calendar.
And I was even talking to acolleague who wasn't making the
calls to connect with possibleleads.
And the thing that was stoppingher was that she got to that
appointment on her calendarbecause she did have an
(16:22):
appointment, but she got to thatpoint and then she was like,
now who should I call?
And she would start looking forwho she would was to call.
So I said, no, you need anappointment on Monday where you
have the names that you're gonnado on Tuesday written in the
calendar.
So when you get thatappointment on Tuesday, you know
exactly what you're gonna do.
And so that's what I think withorganizing too.
(16:44):
You're gonna decide your spaceand you're gonna put an
appointment on the calendar withthe space written in it.
And when that time comes, nowyou have it on the calendar and
you know exactly what to do andyou follow my five steps, and
then you know that you makeprogress.
Michele Folan (17:01):
I love that.
Tracy, we're gonna take a quickbreak, and when we come back, I
want to talk a little bit aboutidentity, beliefs, and changes
in midlife.
Quick pause because if you'rehere, you already know this
isn't just a health podcast.
Yes, we talk about nutrition,strength, and taking care of
(17:22):
your body in midlife, but wealso talk about life,
relationships, energy,boundaries, and what really
matters in this season.
This isn't about perfection orshrinking yourself.
It's about staying strong,curious, connected, and actually
enjoying the years ahead.
If this resonates, share theepisode with a friend who'd
(17:44):
appreciate the conversation andfollow us on Instagram at asking
for a friend underscore pod.
Okay, we are back.
You talk about stepping into anorganized identity.
What does that mean?
Tracy Hoth (18:01):
So, like I said, we don't outperform our identity.
So, whatever we think aboutourselves.
So, if we want to produce theresult of having an organized
home, we need to think ofourselves as organized people or
as an organized person.
So, an example of one of myclients, she could find evidence
(18:21):
that she was organized.
So, we talked about like whereelse are you organized?
And she found it in the way sheplanned vacations.
She found it in her job thatshe had had.
She was very organized in allthose places, just not in her
house.
And that stemmed from, and Idon't know, it's it could be
helpful for you to rememberwhere that's from, but you now
(18:45):
have proof and that you are anorganized person.
So the goal then is to rememberwhat you think in that
situation.
What do you think aboutyourself?
I love planning vacations.
I'm very detail-oriented, I canmake good decisions.
It's super fun to get theresult.
And then you take thosethoughts into your thoughts
(19:07):
about being an organized personin your home and you start
adding evidence to that.
Every 15 minutes, you can addmore evidence.
Look, I know how to sort.
Sorting is easy.
It's putting like things withlike things.
You're gonna get better andbetter at sorting.
I'm really good at sorting.
And so you just keep adding theevidence to it.
(19:28):
And now all of a sudden, youhave an identity of an organized
person.
And because of that, you willcreate.
It's inevitable that you willcreate an organized home.
Michele Folan (19:38):
Well, so what you're saying is you're not
allowing people to say, Well,I'm just not organized.
I just I've never beenorganized.
So you're creating exampleswhere they have been organized.
Okay, I get it.
Tracy Hoth (19:50):
Yes, yes, because if they say that, that's what
they'll create.
And we don't want that.
That's what has not worked forthem all these years.
Yeah, that's a self fulfilling.
In prophecy.
Michele Folan (20:01):
Yeah.
Many of my friends, and I'msure many of our listeners here
are starting to do the emptynesting, the downsizing.
And there is this emotionalattachment to things as kids
leave the nest, right?
Why is it so difficult to letgo of kids' belongings, even
(20:27):
when we logically know it'stime?
Tracy Hoth (20:31):
One of the things when you were saying that was
what does emotionally attachedmean?
Now, I know what we mean whenwe say it, but I like to define
words and thoughts that we have.
So if I say I'm emotionallyattached to that, what exactly
does it mean?
And this is just out ofcuriosity, when we say it, what
(20:53):
does it mean?
Because we can look atemotionally attached, we can
look at the word attached, likeyou're really not attached to
it.
We can start to separate theactual physical object.
But I think it's even easier tosay, okay, going forward, where
am I going?
What do I want my house to looklike?
What do I want to do for mykids?
(21:16):
Like, do I want to give them 14tubs of things that I claimed I
was emotionally attached to?
And then have to have them makedecisions.
Because I've been with peoplewhose parents have dropped off
some stuff for them and they areso mad at them because they're
the ones that kept all thatstuff for them.
So there's so many angles tolook at it, but I think knowing
(21:38):
where you're going is helpful.
And then really breaking itdown like what is emotionally
attachment mean in your mind,because it might not mean
exactly as dramatic as we thinkit is.
And then the other thing ischoosing your favorites.
When you don't have a favoriteor a couple favorites, then
(22:00):
nothing is special.
Nothing is your favoritebecause you have all those
things.
So it can't really be yourfavorite.
So choosing a couple thingsthat are your favorites first is
really helpful.
And then looking at the rest ofthe stuff.
Okay, well, what do I do I wantto replace one of my favorites
with this other object?
No, that's not really asspecial.
(22:21):
And then we can, it helps makethe decisions a little bit
easier when you're looking atthings like that.
And how am I going to honorthat?
Where am I going to put itversus it's just shoved in a box
somewhere?
Michele Folan (22:33):
You're way nicer than I am.
I would probably say you get topick three things.
Three things.
And then that's it.
And then you know, becausewell, we don't need to talk
about my issues, but I am I hateclutter.
Tracy Hoth (22:47):
Yeah.
So you're the opposite, you'rethe one that throws it away and
everyone's hiding it from you sothat they don't get their stuff
taken.
Michele Folan (22:54):
Yeah, pretty much.
So I but but I have these bins,and I know I'm not the only
one, so I'm gonna say this.
I have these bins in thebasement with my daughter's
artwork and baby blankets andmementos from their first
communion and you know, all ofthat stuff.
And I have on multipleoccasions said, Here, take your
(23:18):
bins, take your bins.
And my daughter's like, Oh, andthey they gaslight me and they
say, Oh, but don't you want thatstuff?
Like, no, you both own houses,you can take your stuff, right?
So I think there's also thattug of war with your kids where
(23:39):
you want them to take theirmementos and their artwork
because I think that's stuffthat I feel like they would want
to share with their futurechildren.
Right.
You know, who am I gonna sharethat stuff with?
Tracy Hoth (23:51):
Right.
And they're gonna get iteventually anyway.
But that's like a fun activityto pull it out one time and just
laugh through it together andmake decisions together,
possibly.
But yes, again, of that tub,what would be the things that
you would want to keep foryourself?
And there's so many fun thingsto do, like with the artwork,
(24:13):
you could send it in to the artcompany that makes a book.
They like scan all that in andmake a book.
But do you want to spend moneyon that when the kid doesn't
even care anyway and doesn'twant the things?
Michele Folan (24:24):
I think they want them eventually.
They just want me to like keepit for store them.
Yeah.
I'm bringing this up onlybecause I know I am not the only
one out there that is asdealing with this.
Oh, 100%.
And then you like, what's youradvice when kids feel hurt that
they no longer have their roomin the downsized home?
Tracy Hoth (24:46):
Oh.
There's where I'm more likeyou.
I'm like, well, what do youexpect?
You're not living here anymore.
You have your own room at yourplace.
It's funny because I, when akid moves out, even if they're
just going away to college, I'lllike clean out the whole room.
Or when they I guess it's not,it's when they got their first
(25:07):
apartment.
I clean out the whole room likethe next day.
But I tell them, put everythingthat you want to keep in a bin,
or I'll ask them, send photosif they haven't done it and put
stuff in they they each haveprobably one or two memory bins
that I will give to them.
None of mine have a house yet,so I'm a little behind you.
And then I will drive it overthere and drop it off.
(25:29):
But and then they can gothrough it.
Then they can go through andget rid of whatever they want.
All right, here's the otherone.
Michele Folan (25:36):
Uh a friend of mine is downsizing, they're
going from two homes to one, andthey've got a ton of stuff.
And many times we find that ourkids don't want our stuff.
Tastes have changed.
You know, we we have all thechina and the crystal and all
that stuff we registered forwhen we got married in 1990.
(25:59):
And our kids don't want it.
And I think sometimes there'ssome hurt feelings there where
you're like, well, what do youmean you don't want grandma's
China?
Tracy Hoth (26:11):
Yeah.
That could be the baseline isthat they don't want it.
Don't expect that your kidswant anything.
They have so much stuff, theyhave access to so much more than
we had.
And just expect that they'renot gonna want anything.
And if they do, that's just anice bonus.
But I like just communicating,text them and ask them, what of
(26:31):
these things do you want?
Is there anything in this room?
I'm cleaning it out.
Is there anything you'd want?
And just see.
Michele Folan (26:40):
Yeah.
I think it it can be superchallenging.
We're seeing more and morepeople go from two homes to one.
I know, you know, people are,yeah, they they had the vacation
home in Florida or whatever,and now they're like, uh, this
is getting a lot.
Let's just, you know, downsize.
What challenges do you see comeup the most with people that
are trying to make it to onehome?
Tracy Hoth (27:02):
Well, the big part of that that came up when you
were saying that was somebodywants it.
So if it's not your kids, justrealize someone wants it and
they need it.
And maybe that feels betterthan feeling hurt that our kids
don't want it, is that someonereally wants it and needs it.
And so it's just your job tofind who needs it and wants it,
(27:25):
which I don't think is that hardwhen you call a church or call
a community or call a charitythat you love and you want to
support.
They have a resale shop and youcan support them, and it's such
a beautiful thing.
I even think dropping it off atthe regular charity, there's
people that go there to make aliving by buying stuff and
(27:48):
reselling it.
And just to realize you aresupporting people by donating
your things all over in any ofthe places you could choose.
Yeah.
Michele Folan (27:59):
Oh, I I I agree.
I wanna, and I think that's agreat point, by the way, because
I know it's sometimes thehardest thing is when you're
giving away your great aunt'sChina to a total stranger.
And I know that can that canfeel really odd sometimes.
So yeah.
I want to go back to thecouples thing where you have
(28:24):
couples trying to navigate,let's say, different clutter
tolerances.
How do we navigate that withoutdamaging the relationship?
Because I know this can beproblematic for couples where
one is super neat and the otherone is not.
Tracy Hoth (28:43):
I think one of the helpful things you can do is
define on a zone where clutterisn't allowed or where you
you've agreed on it.
So maybe the main level of yourhouse, and then the clutter
person gets to have the areasthat they want to have the
clutter.
And another thing I just workedon with someone today was they
(29:07):
spend a lot of energy gettingupset because people leave stuff
out, even though she's labeledbins and knows where things go.
But the fact that people aren'tputting it away in the correct
spot is giving her a lot ofspinning in emotion.
And like it's taking a lot ofenergy.
And so one of the things wetalked about was you're really
(29:28):
great at it.
You could put stuff away infive minutes.
Why don't you own that insteadof spending the energy and the
time thinking someone elseshould do it like you or as good
as you or just do it, period.
And then you own it.
You sweep through the house andput everything away in 10
minutes.
Like you could be so fast atthat and spend 10 minutes versus
(29:51):
three hours or two weeks beingmad about it.
Michele Folan (29:54):
Oh, yeah.
I mean, we can be mad, we cancarry that stuff with us for
days, days and days.
I like your first suggestionbecause does anyone else have
this happen where you're gettingready to make dinner, your
husband comes home from work andthrows all his shit all over
the counter?
Glasses, sunglasses, keys,wallet, whatever else is in his
(30:19):
pockets, right it right whereI'm cooking.
And I'm going, you know what?
And he he's like, Why are youmoving my stuff?
Because you put it right in themiddle of the kitchen, but I'm
the one that hates clutter.
So I tuck it back into his hislittle corner in the kitchen
where I can't really see it toomuch.
Tracy Hoth (30:39):
So he does have a designated place for it.
Kinda, yeah.
He just walks in and puts itdown.
Yeah.
I think another big thing is toget buy-in from the other
people.
Like, do they want their stuffin that back spot?
Is it better to have a bowl onthe way to the kitchen where you
could drop it?
Like an easier place to drop itis to get the buy-in from them.
(31:02):
Ooh.
And just say, where would youwant it to be?
unknown (31:07):
Yeah.
Michele Folan (31:07):
Tracy, you're giving me all these ideas.
I mean, I find a cute bowl toput on the counter right inside
the door where he can just puthis stuff.
Tracy Hoth (31:16):
Yeah, because I think if it's easy, we'll do it.
It makes it so much better.
But also, not that if you thinkit's easy, but he does and he's
willing to try.
I think we can always ask andrequest, but then not to spend
more energy than if we were tojust do it ourselves.
Michele Folan (31:36):
Yeah.
All right.
I have a friend who picks upher mail and it goes on the
dining room table.
So the dining room tableessentially for the whole time
she's lived in this house, hasbeen basically the mail catcher.
And I'm like, why do you dothat?
Why don't you just take yourmail over to the kitchen garbage
(31:58):
can?
Because you know two-thirds ofit is garbage anyway, and just
throw it out that way, and thenput your bills in a basket.
And she just looking at me.
I said, Well, I'm just tryingto help you out here because
every time I come over, you'vegot this huge pile of mail.
Like, when do you go throughthat?
(32:18):
I said, That would be morestressful to me.
So, what other tips and tricksdo you have for people that are
struggling?
Tracy Hoth (32:26):
Well, and then what happens is those people that
have those piles put it all in abag when company's gonna come
and shove it in the closet.
And then, you know, they have14 bags of stuff they have to go
through, is what happens a lot.
But with paper, I first of all,you always want to reduce what
you're bringing in.
So there is some resources toreduce that, going paperless,
(32:47):
getting on a no send, you know,credit offers to me list.
So there's that.
And then there's also, I liketo think of paper as a flow,
like river, like a river.
So it's coming into your housefrom different sources, and then
it's flowing.
Where is it gonna flow throughthe house?
So hers obviously flows to thedining room table.
(33:10):
Where how can she change that?
Like you said, where is therecycle bin?
Where is something easy so thatit's on the way, that the river
travels?
And then noticing where thewhere the dam happens, where the
things get backed up and thenthere's damage or it's
overwhelming because you haven'tdone it in so long.
(33:30):
And then where does it gotemporarily?
Where does it go permanently?
And then how does it flow outof your house?
So just to at least have thatthought through and have a
process in place.
And then you just startpracticing a little part of it
at a time.
Like get really good atthrowing away junk mail before
you set it down.
And then the next month, getreally good at deciding, making
(33:54):
decisions earlier, or schedulinga time when you're gonna
process those bills or thingsthat take action.
Oh, here's another one I justthought of.
Ooh, you're you're having allthe examples.
Michele Folan (34:07):
I know.
And none of these are on mylist of questions I was gonna
ask you, but so hopefully Idon't surprise you too much.
I think there is electronicclutter that really impedes
people.
And I'm talking email and thatsort of thing.
What's a good strategy to getthrough an email inbox that is
(34:29):
out of control?
Tracy Hoth (34:31):
Yeah.
Well, again, I like to start byreducing what's coming in.
So unsubscribing, justintensely unsubscribing from
things so that you're notgetting that many emails.
Again, here's the thing (34:47):
if you know where it is and you can
find it when you need it, having20,000 emails isn't necessarily
a problem.
If you can search your emailand you can find it, then it's
not a problem.
Now, if you notice that's aproblem and you don't want to
experience that, then you couldjust take all of them and put
(35:09):
them in an archive folder andthen start fresh and start
really being disciplined onunsubscribing and deleting
emails.
And then again, to have asystem.
So when there's an email thatrequires action from you, what
happens?
Is there a time set aside whenyou do it?
Is there a folder you could putin it?
And that's the action folderthat you would go to when you
(35:32):
have your appointment to processemails.
So again, it's it's like withorganizing, if it's not a
problem, don't focus on it.
If you can find what you needand you know what you have, if
it is a problem, then it needsto be treated like a project
where you schedule it.
I'm gonna have a start date andan end date.
(35:52):
And this is my plan to getthrough the project.
And I'm gonna schedule that soI get it done.
And then it's like freedombecause you've intensely focused
on something and now it's doneversus it's just endless.
Email's gonna go on forever,you know.
Yeah, I've made 15 email, I'vedeleted 15 and I have 20,000.
(36:15):
You know, it just seemsendless.
So going all in on a projectand and looking at it that way,
I think is really helpful.
Michele Folan (36:23):
Back when I was working in corporate world, I
would at times go to my email,and if it's something that is
three months or older, I wouldjust go in and delete it.
Yeah.
Talk about freeing your soul.
Tracy Hoth (36:38):
Yes.
You know, and you know, kind ofnowadays, if someone needs
something, they're gonna emailyou again.
Exactly.
Or they're gonna reach out toyou.
So it's not like most thingsare super important or
detrimental if you deleted it.
Michele Folan (36:53):
Do you ever recommend that people get a
storage unit?
Tracy Hoth (36:57):
Well, I think about what's the purpose because that
storage unit, once you get it,it it doesn't go away easily.
Pretty much is really hard toever get rid of it if it's just
for a regular purpose.
Okay.
So, no, I don't recommendunless it's for a purpose like
we're moving and we're in anapartment for one year and you
(37:19):
know, or we're having a housebuilt or, you know, something
like that where you need it.
All right.
I had to ask that.
Michele Folan (37:25):
I didn't know if that was kind of like a stopgap
for someone that just had to gettheir house cleared out and it
gave them an opportunity to haveall the stuff in one place
where they could then start togo through it.
Tracy Hoth (37:37):
Yeah, the problem with that, I mean, that sounds
exciting because they could geteverything out of their house,
but I think it doesn't take awaythe fact that you're still
gonna have to make decisions andnow everything's piled on top
of everything else.
And how are you gonna sort anyof that?
So it just makes it morechallenging.
Michele Folan (37:56):
All right.
And then what does it trulymean to leave a mess-free legacy
for our children?
Tracy Hoth (38:03):
I think having decided where you're going and
making sure everything that youkeep is stuff that supports that
life that you want.
It's stuff you love, it's stuffyou use, and that's it.
And then if something were tohappen, the legacy for your kids
(38:23):
is that they're not spending somuch time going through all
this stuff that you didn't makedecisions on.
It's stuff that you never used,you thought might have been
nice, or you spent money on it,but you never used it.
They've never didn't even knowyou had it, and now they're
having to make decisions.
It just puts a big burden onthem.
And one of my clients recentlysaid, you know, her father had
(38:46):
passed, she cared, she was acaregiver for him, and he
passed.
And she, I was asking her if Ican do anything.
And she's like, Tracy, justplease keep telling people, make
sure you go through your stuff.
It's already hard enough totake care of someone and to see
them die, and then to have to gothrough all the stuff and make
(39:07):
decisions and have so much moreburden or pressure or things on
you.
So take the time.
Now is the perfect time for youto start downsizing and making
decisions and letting go ofthings.
Michele Folan (39:21):
I think that is really, really great advice.
And I have a basement thatneeds to be gone through this
winter.
So that's my project because mydaughters have already said,
mom, don't leave us a ton ofstuff.
But because they saw us gothrough it, uh, my siblings and
me when my mom passed away.
And so I I hear that.
(39:43):
And so I I think that is greatreinforcement coming from you,
Tracy Hoth.
Tracy Hoth (39:49):
Yes.
Well, and I think too, if thinkof it as a gift to yourself.
Like this is a gift, it's aweight off your own shoulders as
you're going through thatstuff.
And if it's Easier to think ofit like if we had to move, I
want my house to haveeverything.
All I would do is pack itbecause I know everything in it
(40:10):
is stuff that I love and use.
Now I'm not there.
That's what I'll be doing inOrganized Life Academy this
year.
I am going to be going througheach room as I assign, you know,
the space for the month.
I'm going to be going throughthat the same way, but I'm
looking at it this year as Imight move.
I might want to move.
And if I do, I want my house tobe ready to stage it.
(40:30):
I want it to be staged andready to sell.
And all I have to do is packthe things that I love that I
know I'm taking with me.
Michele Folan (40:38):
See, I have a husband that is a pack rat would
be, I think, applicable.
He is a sentimental guy and hehas a lot of memory stuff.
He collections.
He was Iron Man.
So he's he got like all of hisribbons and trophy stuff and you
(41:00):
know pictures back when he wasplaying ice hockey when he was
14.
And that stuff's like superimportant to him.
But he's there's tons of itdown there in the basement.
Tracy Hoth (41:12):
Yeah.
And if it's packed up in a tuband that's his, and that's fine.
Like I notice a lot of times,like I have another couple I'm
working with, and she focuses alot on what he's not doing, and
he focuses a lot on what she'snot doing.
And I'm like, why don't y'alljust focus on yourselves?
Get your own stuff done, youknow.
(41:34):
But so I think that's kind offun.
Like once you've gone througheverything you have control over
that you would make decisionson, I think they're they'll be a
little inspired.
Michele Folan (41:45):
All right.
There is a bin, and it's a verylarge bin, Tracy, of old
electronics and cords, like oldHDMI cords and coaxial cable
kind of stuff.
Yeah.
No one's ever gonna use thatstuff again.
And men traditionally will say,Oh, we never know for if if you
(42:08):
know we'll need that forsomething.
I just think it's one of thosethey just feel overwhelmed and
they don't want to go through itjust to dig out the one or two
things in there that maybe stillbe usable because that stuff
changes and yeah, with newtechnology and everything.
Right.
So now you got a fire lit underme, and I'm I'm we're we're
(42:29):
pulling that stuff out thiswinter and we're gonna get
through it because I really dowant to get through some things.
Tracy Hoth (42:35):
Well, in that kind of stuff, I think it's gotten a
lot easier.
I've noticed families are ableto let go of things like that
more than they ever have in thepast because it's so easily
accessible.
You can go on Amazon, find anycord you want, and have it
delivered overnight.
So if you were to give awaysomething that you needed, you
(42:57):
wouldn't regret it, I'm prettysure.
And when is the last time youwent into that bin to get a
cord?
Oh, never.
So I think there's you can takethat cord to I I don't know for
sure.
You'd have to call and see, butat one point you could take
cords to recycle, like at BestBuy or Electronics to recycle
(43:20):
and just get rid of the wholething.
Don't even have to go throughit.
Michele Folan (43:23):
But I mean you might want to, but yeah, we need
we do definitely need to findhow to recycle that stuff
because I don't want that stuffin a landfill.
But all right, you are also thehost of the Organized Coach
Podcast.
What inspired you to start ashow and who is the show for
specifically?
Tracy Hoth (43:42):
Well, the organized coach podcast started back when
I was shifting a little bit andhelping more business owners get
organized.
And so a lot of it is businessfocused and it can be any
business.
It's just anyone with digitalorganization that needs help.
So I teach how to organize yourdigital files, how to organize
(44:05):
your time and your systems andall of that.
But I also, for the last sixyears, have had a side of my
business where I help women inthe later half of life organize
their home.
So I do talk a lot about homeorganization, just personal life
organization on the podcast.
So I have listeners that areboth business owners and regular
(44:27):
people, I call homeowners.
Michele Folan (44:30):
But you don't go into people's homes anymore, but
you did start that way,correct?
Tracy Hoth (44:35):
Yes, I did that for many years until finally in
2023, I was still doing it whileI had my online business.
And I decided, okay, I'm done.
Michele Folan (44:46):
Yeah.
And so when you're coachingpeople virtually, can you can
you get a pretty good sense ofwhat you're dealing with?
Tracy Hoth (44:53):
Yes, they can send pictures.
I had someone this morning justsend me pictures, and it's so
good to see actual pictures andtake videos and show me videos.
So I do a lot of that type ofthing.
And we do a lot on what's yourplan?
How's it working on yourcalendar?
What are you doing or not doingand why?
(45:14):
So we look a lot at the mindsetand what they're believing and
make shifts that they need tolet go of things.
There's just so many aspects ofcreating a clutter-free home
that you can definitely doonline.
But we make a plan, and that'stheir plan, is and we see why
they're following their plan ornot following their plan.
(45:34):
All right.
Michele Folan (45:36):
For someone listening who feels really
overwhelmed right now, what'sthe simplest place to start?
Tracy Hoth (45:43):
Well, I would say for sure, go get the 15-minute
declutter challenge.
It's at simplysquared away.comforward slash declutter.
And in that, I show you thefive steps to organizing.
They spell the word space, andyou pick one small area, you set
your timer, and you sort.
(46:04):
Whenever I'm overwhelmed, thefirst step to organizing is
always just to sort.
So as far as where to start andpicking the area, that's not as
important.
Pick the one that creates themost friction.
Pick the one that would makeyou the happiest if you had it
organized.
Pick the smallest one so youget a good win.
(46:26):
Whatever the reason is, that'snot as important as sorting.
The first thing you do in thatarea is to sort.
Because then you have like withlike, and you're not making big
decisions right in thebeginning.
You don't make those until youhave a category.
And then you can look at it andsay, again, what's my favorite?
(46:46):
What do I use all the timehere?
And then you can go to thenext, you know, other questions
after that.
Michele Folan (46:53):
All right.
Tracy Hoth, where can thelisteners find you and your
coaching?
Tracy Hoth (46:58):
Yes, my website is simply squaredaway.com and
everything is on there.
And again, the 15-minutechallenge and my podcast are
probably the best places to getto know me.
Michele Folan (47:09):
Perfect.
Tracy Hoth, thank you so much.
I'm I'm looking forward todigging into my basement this
winter and um I'll reach out andI'll let you know how it goes.
Tracy Hoth (47:19):
Yes, Michelle, isn't it fun when you talk about it?
You all of a sudden get somotivated whenever I'm working
with someone.
I'm like, I gotta get out ofhere.
I gotta go do that in my ownhouse.
Yeah.
And so it gets you, it keepsyou motivated.
That's why I think get thesupport you need to stay
motivated.
Michele Folan (47:34):
And I think it's also making promises to yourself
and keeping those promises.
Tracy Hoth (47:40):
Yeah.
Michele Folan (47:41):
Because the payoff is huge with that peace
of mind.
Tracy Hoth (47:44):
Yeah, for sure.
Michele Folan (47:46):
Thanks for being here today.
Thanks for having me, Michele.
Before you go, thank you forbeing here.
If you want to go a littledeeper, make sure you check out
the show notes for this episode.
That's where I link anything wementioned, resources, partners,
or tools I actually use andtrust.
And if you're not already onthe Asking for a Friend
(48:07):
community newsletter, that'swhere I share practical midlife
tips, favorite finds, recipes,and the things that don't always
make it onto the podcast orInstagram.
You'll find the link to join inthe show notes.
Take care, and I'll see younext week.
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