Smack Dabble: Charles Lightoller

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Oh, hey there.

Speaker 2 (00:01):
Oh, hey there.
How are you?

Speaker 1 (00:02):
I'm well, how are you ?
I'm very good.
Thank you Excellent.
We wanted to pop on real quickbefore this episode to kind of
cover the results of theKentucky Derby.

Speaker 2 (00:15):
Yeah, because Kate had Sovereignty and I had
Burnham Square and Kate won.

Speaker 1 (00:23):
Sovereignty won coming from the back end
congratulations, kate.

Speaker 2 (00:27):
I'm picking the proper winning horse yeah,
sovereignty.

Speaker 1 (00:31):
I based it solely because of the name, because I
thought it was pretty that'swhat a lot of people do when
they pick horse races, yeah um.
So just a little bit of likeinformation um sovereignty was
born february 22nd 2022 crazyyep um the jockey was junior
alvarado.
Yeah um.

(00:52):
The trainer was william mott,owner was um godolphin llc and
the breeder was godolphin um andand sovereignty for winning the
raise won 3.1 million dollars.
Yeah, that's impressive and as Iwas looking up, um, the owners

(01:13):
and the jockeys and everything,yeah, I um I read an article
that pretty much every horse issomehow like, every horse in the
derby is somehow connected tosecretariat, right, because of
the breeding and all that.
Yes, yes.
So I thought that that waspretty cool.
I believe it said thatSovereignty was the fifth

(01:33):
generation of Secretariat.

Speaker 2 (01:37):
Nice.
Yeah, that's pretty cool.
So congratulations, sovereignty, winning the roses this year in
2025.
Yeah, absolutely that's 2025.

Speaker 1 (01:46):
Yeah, absolutely, that's fantastic.
Yeah, that was pretty cool.
So the track was super, supersloppy oh my gosh and oh my gosh
.
The horses and the jockeys weredisgusting.

Speaker 2 (01:55):
At the end, you can tell if a horse, if someone's in
front, you can tell.
On days like that, because,they are not dirty, but everyone
behind them looks like theywent through a mud hole.
So that's pretty funny, yeah,but yeah, so, yeah, we just want
to check in and saycongratulations, Kate, on
picking the proper horse.

Speaker 1 (02:14):
I'll cheers to that.

Speaker 2 (02:15):
Yeah, cheers to that.

Speaker 1 (02:16):
All right, Enjoy the episode everyone oh, hey there
oh, hey there I am so excitedtell me why?

Speaker 2 (02:42):
because we're the history buffoons and I'm bradley
and you're kate.
So we don't forget, I am kate.
Yeah, I just went over that umI'm bradley, no, okay.

Speaker 1 (02:52):
So I'm so excited because, um, our friend tara,
yes, brought a little bit ofhome, shout out to me yes, um,
tara, um, to me.
Yes, tara goes to Nebraskaevery once in a blue moon.
Yes, and she was unable to gothis year.
However, she had co-workers.
She had co-workers who went toNebraska and they brought back.

Speaker 2 (03:17):
Thunder Punch, Thunder Punch.
So to give you, to giveeveryone else but Kate an idea.
I have been hearing about thisthe entire time I've known.
Kate and I get to enjoy aThunder Punch from Thunderhead
Brewing Company out of Kearney.

(03:38):
Nebraska which is where you'refrom.

Speaker 1 (03:40):
I mean, even just it's a cool can.

Speaker 2 (03:43):
Yeah, it's black.
It's got nice purpley, whichside note, kate's favorite color
.

Speaker 1 (03:51):
Oh, by the way, it contains alcohol.

Speaker 2 (03:53):
Say what yeah Better.

Speaker 1 (03:55):
Malt beverage with natural and artificial flavors.
We're not going to talk aboutthe red dye.
Number 40 that's in here.
Oh, whatever, jesus.
Christ but it literally saysgrape citrus punch spiked with
fruit and candy sugar I mean andI remember wholeheartedly that
great flavor and I've only everhad it on tap.

Speaker 2 (04:15):
I didn't even know they made cans well, that's one
of the reasons why, when youshowed me this, I was super
shocked and excited becauseyou've always mentioned it where
you just had it on tap, so Ididn't know they actually can
this stuff.

Speaker 1 (04:27):
So the last time I went to Thunderhead Brewing
Company it was a couple of yearsago.
I was on my way to Wyoming forCheyenne Days.

Speaker 2 (04:36):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (04:37):
And my friend and I stopped there for a Thunder
Punch Right and I asked for oneon a tap right.

Speaker 2 (04:43):
And they go.
Which one, which one?
I?

Speaker 1 (04:45):
I was like, wait, what it was like they've only
ever had grape you've told methis, but I've I've been gone
for so long that they like havelime and I don't know all kinds
of flavors, but I was like, no,oh he's, oh, he's just why did
it explode on me, though?
So tara my blue, my blue, up onme too washing stuff later.

Speaker 2 (05:09):
Oh my gosh, that is great.
Does that bring a little hometo you, burp?
Oh man first burp of theepisode.
Folks wait for more.
Yeah, I got some on my wall,yeah what do you think?

(05:34):
Let me take another sip whileyou talk about it it needs to be
a little colder it doesdefinitely need to be colder.

Speaker 1 (05:42):
I drove two hours with this in my car.

Speaker 2 (05:44):
Yeah, it's good, I like it.

Speaker 1 (05:49):
Oh, my God, I love it so much.
I'm so excited.

Speaker 2 (05:52):
I'm a little sticky because it went all over my
shirt and my pants and my wall.
How did that happen?
I have no idea.

Speaker 1 (05:59):
OK, that was delicious and I'm so excited to
keep drinking.

Speaker 2 (06:04):
Thank, you, tara.

Speaker 1 (06:05):
Thank you, Tara, that was delicious and I'm so
excited to keep drinking.
Thank you, tara.
Thank you, tara, okay, um, yes,I have.
Well, first of all, okay um, weare on youtube.
We mentioned that last episode,but we're really like trying,
trying to get on youtube.
We have these videos now.
We're still kind of getting thehang of this yes um, so

(06:29):
backgrounds might changelocation of the camera might
change.
We're just kind of figuring outlike what all we we like and
don't like about this setup yeah, so the our first video we
recorded at kate's.

Speaker 2 (06:44):
This video is in the pod loft at his house, at my
house, so, um, things aredefinitely going to change
throughout the videos till wekind of find out what our, what
our like is if you will, yeah uh, but just side note, the nice
canvas painting behind kate'swas painted by kate.
Yeah, uh, commissioned bybradley, but, um, I thought she

(07:08):
did a great job and I wanted tomake sure it was in the video
because, well, it's us yeah, soI like it, it's, it's, that's my
buffoon that's my buffoon, sothank you again for making that
you're welcome cheers to that.
I don't know what that weirdlook is for, but I said you're
welcome I know I heard that part, jesus, so it's funny because I

(07:30):
originally I got out uh, twofor each of us and they're like.
She's like oh, it's not verycold, let's put them back in the
fridge so there might be apause at some point.
Um, so bear with us Just saying.

Speaker 1 (07:45):
Oh my gosh.
Okay, it's so good.
Now just imagine like a barambiance, did you say?

Speaker 2 (07:53):
ambiance or ambiance.

Speaker 1 (07:54):
Ambiance.
There it is.
I probably said ambiance.
I know it's ambiance Okay.

Speaker 2 (08:01):
I know you do.
That's why I had to just makesure.

Speaker 1 (08:08):
So thanks for bearing with us.
As far as like the, the video,the transition to including
video.

Speaker 2 (08:12):
Uh, we've been wanting to do this for a while.
We're just trying to figure itout.
We're all still really new tothis.
I mean we've only our podcasthas only been officially around
for uh seven months?
yeah right, three, four, sevenmonths.
Yeah Right, three, four, sevenmonths.
We're like, no, eight monthsnow, as of tomorrow was our
first.
Yeah, so eight months.
So we're still learning, we'restill growing.

(08:34):
We're getting better.
I mean, I've been learningtricks and tips about editing to
make it sound better.
Now I get to learn how to dovideo, so that's going to be fun
.
Uh, so I'm hoping the videosget better over time too,
because I feel like our audiohas gotten better over time.
Um, obviously, we're stillreleasing on the audio mediums,

(08:56):
but uh, we're we're trying toinclude some more, uh, videos of
us doing our episodes, so wecan try and uh, I don't know
videos of us doing our episodes.
So we can try and I don't knowbe a little more personable to
our listeners and get them toknow us a little better.
Just in case Tara doesn't knowwhat we look like yeah, I mean,
we've met her in person, but youknow she might forget, she
might forget.
But I guess my point is anyonewho's listened to us only over

(09:19):
audio has no idea what like.
Who are these jamokes?
Well, we're us, the what has noidea what like who are these
jamokes?

Speaker 1 (09:28):
well, we're us.
So what jamokes?
I've never heard that.
You've never jamokes.
Oh, all right, no old, did youjust make that up?

Speaker 2 (09:32):
not at all I, I'm old , I know you like to tell me?
That I know.
So, anyways, all we're sayingis bear with, bear with us as we
grow, because we're learningtoo.

Speaker 1 (09:46):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (09:46):
And I know there's a lot of other podcasts and video
podcasts out there, but weappreciate anyone who listens
and watches us.

Speaker 1 (09:53):
Yes, thank you so much, thank you very much.

Speaker 2 (09:55):
So cheers to you as well, and I'm going to take
another sip of my Thunder Punchafter I burp that one out.
Holy balls.
Oh, that's so good Do you havea question for me today.

Speaker 1 (10:07):
I don't what the fuck .
You know why.

Speaker 2 (10:10):
Because you don't remember.

Speaker 1 (10:11):
No, because my story is a little long, oh dear.
So I'm actually not going to gointo a question.
I should have brought a pillow.
No, no.
Okay.
Yes no, no, okay, yes, we'regonna talk about, yes, charles
light holler light hollerl-i-g-h-t light and holla aller

(10:36):
aller o-l-l-e-r light withoutthe h.

Speaker 2 (10:39):
Okay, charles light holler, charles Lightoller.

Speaker 1 (10:42):
Lightoller.

Speaker 2 (10:44):
Lightoller.

Speaker 1 (10:45):
Lightoller.

Speaker 2 (10:46):
Lightoller.
Anyways, lightoller, charles.
Okay, let's go with Chuck,chuck.

Speaker 1 (10:55):
He was born on March 30th.

Speaker 2 (10:57):
Okay 1874.
That is a long time ago, yeah.

Speaker 1 (11:03):
He was born in Lancashire.
Is that how you say thatLancashire?
Yeah, it's not Lancashire, it'slike Lancashire.
I mean it could be, could be,but I don't think it is.
To somebody it might be, I mean, I'm British, are you
Lancashire?
How's that go?
Lancashire, lancashire,lancashire, lancashire.
He had some deep roots in thecotton mills.

Speaker 2 (11:27):
Okay, so he's from the south.

Speaker 1 (11:30):
Of Lancashire.

Speaker 2 (11:32):
Where is that?

Speaker 1 (11:32):
London or England.

Speaker 2 (11:34):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (11:35):
Lancashire yeah.

Speaker 2 (11:36):
Okay, you didn't say that you said I'm British.

Speaker 1 (11:39):
Have you ever heard of Lancashire?
Like two seconds ago.
I did it's in England, okay,yeah.

Speaker 2 (11:46):
Is it like near jolly old England?
Everyone refers to it.
I mean it is in jolly oldEngland.

Speaker 1 (11:51):
I don't know where it is in.

Speaker 2 (11:53):
England.
So where is it compared toactually like London?

Speaker 1 (11:58):
Lancashire.

Speaker 2 (12:03):
That was not a part of her research.

Speaker 1 (12:05):
Why would it have been?

Speaker 2 (12:07):
because I don't know of some random fucking place in
england.

Speaker 1 (12:11):
I know where london is oh, it's a it living in a
county, okay, so it's likedirectly in the middle of

(12:32):
england.
Okay, to the west, it's like awest coast, so like closer to
ireland, correct?
Okay, gotcha, all right, let'smove on from this, okay, okay.
So, in essence, In Essex.

Speaker 2 (12:47):
Essex is in what?

Speaker 1 (12:48):
Chorley Chorley, Lancashire.
Chorley Chorley, Lancashire.

Speaker 2 (12:53):
Sounds like you're having a stroke when you say
that.

Speaker 1 (12:55):
Okay, let's just move on, shall we.
Charles lost his mother toscarlet fever um right after his
birth and at the age of 10 hisfather moved to new zealand, oh
wow, leaving him in the care ofhis extended family.

Speaker 2 (13:13):
Charles's extended family so his dad just said
peace out, I'm going to newzealand yeah, and there was so.

Speaker 1 (13:18):
Okay, rewind.
I read a book.

Speaker 2 (13:23):
I don't know, was it about this?
It was.

Speaker 1 (13:26):
Okay, it's called.
I don't want to give it away.

Speaker 2 (13:30):
I won't give away the title because it kind of gives
it away a little bit.
Yeah, don't do that, we don'twant that.

Speaker 1 (13:34):
But it is by Charles Lightoller, so it's an
autobiography.

Speaker 2 (13:37):
Oh, he wrote a book.
Okay, he did Gotcha.

Speaker 1 (13:49):
So he actually didn't say why his father went to New
Zealand.
Okay, just that his father kindof exhausted his time in the
cotton fields, like he was, justlike I've maxed out in my
efforts apparently went to NewZealand.

Speaker 2 (13:54):
I mean, I feel like I've done that in a lot of
aspects of life.

Speaker 1 (13:57):
Can we just like Can.

Speaker 2 (13:58):
I just say no, move countries Apparently.
That's what this fucker did,yeah, so how could you leave
your kid like that?
Was he an only child?

Speaker 1 (14:08):
I don't know he didn't talk about his family
really I mean talked about hisdad he didn't talk about his
family.
Really, that's so funny that isodd.

Speaker 2 (14:20):
So maybe he was an only kid, but I'm just
speculating obviously.

Speaker 1 (14:23):
So at 13 years old he decided no way am I going to
run these Lancashire cottonfields.
I don't want to do what my daddid.

Speaker 2 (14:36):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (14:36):
So he signs up for a four-year apprenticeship on a
ship.
What ship was it?
It's called the Primrose.

Speaker 2 (14:44):
Hill primrose.
Yeah, what is that?
Like the primrose line, sorrydavinci code, anyways.
Um wait, that's not.

Speaker 1 (14:54):
I probably got that wrong so he was all like let's,
let's just jump into the deepend.
Um, I don't want to be in thefield, so let's be on the sea,
okay I mean, that's quite achange.
That's literally the oppositeso charles does say, quote my
first voyage horribly seasick,oh I bet, and sick of the sea
end quote I don't think they haddramamine back then, so they

(15:18):
just I need that like shot upinto my veins when I'm on the
sea oh wow, yeah, I just take adram, not dramamine I take that
I I get that from my phagiaphagia, you get the dramamine
from your, from your dadprobably too.
He's usually stocked up.
Shout out to kate's dad for thedramamine so his life on like

(15:41):
the primrose hill wasessentially like ski sea school
for him.

Speaker 2 (15:44):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (15:45):
That's literally where he learned the ropes, and
I think that's an idiom that Isaid to you after I did this
research Learn the ropes.

Speaker 2 (15:53):
I think you did say that to me, yeah.

Speaker 1 (15:55):
His second voyage was on the Holt Hill.
Holt Hill Is that a ship?

Speaker 2 (16:01):
Yes, and they went to Rio.
Oh, I'm sorry.
You said second voyage yes, andthey went to Rio.

Speaker 1 (16:05):
Oh, I'm sorry, you said second voyage.

Speaker 2 (16:08):
Yes, okay, my apologies, so not just beaches
and sunshine down in Rio, likeRio de Janeiro.

Speaker 1 (16:12):
They actually had a smallpox outbreak down there.

Speaker 2 (16:15):
Oh, so it was a large smallpox outbreak.

Speaker 1 (16:19):
It was a large smallpox.
People are dying.

Speaker 2 (16:23):
I shouldn't be laughing at people dying.

Speaker 1 (16:28):
No medicine, no doctors.
People are dying.
I shouldn't be laughing atpeople dying.
No medicine, no doctors.
Where'd they all go?

Speaker 2 (16:31):
nada, they didn't exist on this ship, oh, oh,
you're saying on the ship.
How could you sail without adoctor on the ship?
I don't know how that works Idon't either, because I'm not
what you would call a seafaringperson yeah, but um, I find that
odd, even for eight wait.
So you said what year he wasborn.
Right, it was 1874 so what yearis this?

Speaker 1 (16:52):
oh, he's 13 years old when he goes to the primrose
hill and this is his secondvoyage all right, so 1887 1888
so maybe 15.

Speaker 2 (17:01):
It's kind of weird how 1888 keeps coming back in
our episodes.

Speaker 1 (17:05):
It's not planned.

Speaker 2 (17:07):
I know it's not.
That's the funny thing.

Speaker 1 (17:08):
Okay, so Light Taller is attending all these little
burial services at sea becauseof the smallpox outbreak.
Sure, that makes sense.
The captain of the ship, jockSutherland, jock Uh-huh.

Speaker 2 (17:21):
That's a strong name.

Speaker 1 (17:23):
He's like the guy.
He is a legend and a completemadman, yes, so is he a madman
or madman man?
Okay he'd sail through stormswith the ship, practically I was
gonna say driving sailingsideways, waves crashing

(17:43):
everywhere.
Lytler says it was absolutelyterrifying, but equally
thrilling Right.
And Jock, this Jock guy.
He was so confident in his shipthat he wouldn't let anyone
even think about taking down asail.

Speaker 2 (17:57):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (17:58):
They're like no, we're not, we're not making camp
here, we're going through this.

Speaker 2 (18:03):
How would you make camp?

Speaker 1 (18:04):
in the water.

Speaker 2 (18:05):
Okay, that was just a euphemism and I just came up
with it myself.
I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 (18:09):
So Jock Sutherland, the captain Jock, he was such a
madman, he actually pulled a gunon the crew once, oh shit, just
to make sure that they wouldnot lower the sails so they like
hey man, I'm fucking seriousabout this.

Speaker 2 (18:24):
Wow, Okay, so he was not joking around.

Speaker 1 (18:28):
And the voyages that they're on with this captain.
They lose a guy overboard in astorm, they lose a couple of
masts in another Absolute chaoson this ship, wow.
And basically it's likeLightoller's getting getting his
additional hardcore sailortraining on this ship Right.
So he's learning about thelimits of the ship, the limits

(18:50):
of the captain's nerve even it'sdangerous.
But there's also this sensethat he's learning from the best
, even if the best is a littlebit of a lunatic.

Speaker 2 (19:02):
Well, it seems that way.
Good lord, little bit of alunatic, well it seems that way.

Speaker 1 (19:05):
Good lord, his captain was pushing the ship a
little bit too hard, even thoughthey were barely loaded, and it
was a blowing gale.

Speaker 2 (19:12):
Yeah, massive windstorm right hey, gail, we
got that back too.

Speaker 1 (19:17):
So they're tearing along at this crazy speed on the
on the ocean.
Okay, 13 and a half knots,which apparently is pretty fast.

Speaker 2 (19:24):
I don't know, I don't think it's very fast at all,
but that's coming from a carpoint of view I have heard that
that's, uh, at least 12 knotsfaster than one and a half knots
, so that's pretty fast.
I I wish I understood like thatlingo better, because I've
heard it for quite some time Iwant to say it's about 25 miles

(19:48):
an hour yeah, but on water.

Speaker 1 (19:49):
That's so much faster feeling than 25 miles in a car
I'm gonna look it up real quickbecause that's what I'm saying,
like it doesn't seem fast but iton the water, it's fast 13
knots maybe to me it is twomiles per hour.

Speaker 2 (20:06):
15 it's only 15.
Yeah, yeah, but for 1888, shoutout to that year again.
Um, that's pretty fastsupposedly.

Speaker 1 (20:18):
well, that's what they say, so maybe it is, and we
just, we just don't know,because we're on the ground and
it seems really slow, because Iwent 90 today to get down here.

Speaker 2 (20:29):
But we're not on the ground, we're on the second
floor.
Okay, anyways.

Speaker 1 (20:33):
So the ship's all over the place, going 13 and a
half knots, the crew isstruggling to keep it safe and
neither the captain nor the matewants to be the first to say
maybe we should slow down ohreally, but he was just gung-ho
they were stubborn well, andthen there's like shock stubborn

(20:54):
, or was he?

Speaker 2 (20:56):
oh for sure he was stubborn he was stubborn.

Speaker 1 (20:58):
He's like now we got this, this ship has got this
we're.
But then this rain squallhappened.

Speaker 2 (21:05):
Oh shit.

Speaker 1 (21:06):
Yeah, they can't see anything.
And suddenly there's land rightin front of them.
Oh, they're going way too fastto avoid it, right?
What does this sound like toyou?

Speaker 2 (21:18):
It sounds like maybe.

Speaker 1 (21:21):
A ship going too fast and it's going to run into
something.

Speaker 2 (21:23):
Yeah, they're going to be like the Titanic.

Speaker 1 (21:26):
Yeah, that's what it sounds like, right.

Speaker 2 (21:28):
At first I went with Gilgan's Island.
I've never seen that show.
I grew up on that stuff becauseI'm old yeah.

Speaker 1 (21:36):
So they're going too fast to avoid it, right?
And just this moment of likepure panicked realization that
they're about to crash.

Speaker 2 (21:43):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (21:45):
They of like pure panicked realization that
they're about to crash.

Speaker 2 (21:48):
Okay, they're gonna run aground, things go south
real fast, okay, even thoughthey're going west.
I was gonna say something, butI'm glad you did.
That was great, well done okay.

Speaker 1 (21:58):
So the captain's having to decide between
smashing into the rock sideways,right, which means which means
everyone is probably dead orjust running her straight
aground.
Right, okay, right.
So my research brought me tothe point of talk about a rock
in a hard place.

Speaker 2 (22:22):
Oh, that's great.

Speaker 1 (22:23):
Lightoller is up on deck, okay, and land is up on
deck.
Okay, and land is like loomingover them.
Giant waves are tossing aroundthe ship like a toy.
Okay, and he's saying it's likewaiting for a train wreck, like
he's visualizing.
This land is getting closer.
It is windy, it is rainy.
I can't see shit.
Right, here we go.

(22:44):
Well, yeah, I mean, you're goingthat fast, you're gonna, you're
gonna fuck some shit up theyhit it of course they hit land,
he light color describes it asutterly alien feeling, a shudder
that goes right through you.

Speaker 2 (22:58):
And he's just a kid yeah, because he said he would
be 15 at this point.
Right, right, ish, ish give ortake, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (23:04):
And he's thinking his little life is about to end His
little life and you can justfeel like this sheer.

Speaker 2 (23:10):
It's so cute how you refer to it, his little life.

Speaker 1 (23:14):
This gut-wrenching helplessness in his words.
It's not just a shipwreck, it'slike a front row seat to
watching your demise.

Speaker 2 (23:23):
No kidding, especially in a land that you're
not familiar with.
Yes, you said they're going toRio for this.

Speaker 1 (23:29):
They're around Rio, okay.
So after the initial crash,things got worse.
I mean, usually does.
The ship basically gets wedgedbetween huge rocks and the ocean
oh, I was going to say in ahard place Just starting to tear
it apart from the back end.
Ooh, so Lightoller gets knockedout by flying debris.

(23:51):
Oh, shit.
Sounds terrifying.
Yes, he wakes up and this wholeordeal of being thrown onto the
rocks.
He's talking about how close heis to breaking his legs by
being tossed onto these rocks.
He's almost drowns as well,sure as the waves are like

(24:12):
pulling him back out into thesea undertow, kind of thing yeah
, he loses his shoes in theprocess.
I don't know how the oceanunties his shoes, but whatever
well, I mean maybe at a bucklebut after that he sees another
guy okay have to climb thisslick, pitch black rock face in
the freezing rain.

(24:33):
One thing after another, justthis total nightmare you can see
, like this raw, desperatestruggle for survival, right,
okay.
So he, he's fighting for hislife, like clinging on to these
rocks.
He almost gets pulled back intothe sea and they, they actually
end up losing one of his mates.
Oh shit what was his name fuckif I know, but apparently people

(25:00):
liked him light, taller, likedhim a lot well, not enough to
know his name nope, but the shipis gone so how, how much?

Speaker 2 (25:09):
did it like just break up on impact, basically,
yeah, okay yeah, it's just on.

Speaker 1 (25:13):
I was gonna say uninhabitable.
That's not right.
I mean it's.
You're not wrong, I'm not,because they technically lived
on this ship.
I have to spread my legs,that's fine.
Oh my gosh, okay, stretch.
So he watches it as the seabreaks it apart.
The masts are falling, thewhole back end is sinking.

(25:34):
He describes it as a volcanicwasteland of an island that he's
on, which adds to the whole.

Speaker 2 (25:42):
We're stranded and it's awful vibe well, yeah, I
mean, you're in a place you haveno idea.
You literally just crashed intoit.
That's got to be fuckingterrifying he's climbing.

Speaker 1 (25:54):
He's trying to climb these like rock faces, these
cliffs, um dodging rocks fallingall around them.
It's never.
It's like a never-ending seriesof little near-death
experiences.

Speaker 2 (26:06):
Right, yeah.

Speaker 1 (26:07):
And the ship is just completely falling apart before
their eyes Then, as if it wasn'tenough, well, what else can
there be?
This island that they ran intois deserted.

Speaker 2 (26:20):
Well, I guess at least there's not locals that
would want to kill them.

Speaker 1 (26:24):
That's fair.
I mean right.
So it's actually in the indianocean.
I thought they were going torio, so we were moving from rio.

Speaker 2 (26:34):
Oh, to the indian ocean.
I guess I either missed that orwasn't informed of that portion
of the story.
You were not informed.
All right, you're welcome.
Thank you for that.

Speaker 1 (26:43):
Hey, I haven't read this story in three weeks.
I am flying by the absoluteseat of my pants here.

Speaker 2 (26:50):
That's an idiom.
Oh yeah, Look at us uncovershit.

Speaker 1 (26:55):
Where is Rio?

Speaker 2 (26:58):
Is that Africa, south Africa, rio de Janeiro.

Speaker 1 (27:00):
That's South Africa.

Speaker 2 (27:01):
That's South America, isn't it?
Fuck Rio de Janeiro.
That's.

Speaker 1 (27:06):
South Africa, that's South America, isn't it?
Fuck Rio De Janeiro.
A city in Brazil.
We're both wrong.

Speaker 2 (27:12):
Yeah, South America is what I said.
Where the fuck is Brazil, NotAfrica?
No, in South America.
Like I said, Wow.
I'd like to reiterate we arebuffoons.

Speaker 1 (27:30):
Holy shit.
Well, they're in the IndianOcean at this point.

Speaker 2 (27:34):
That's quite a fucking detour.

Speaker 1 (27:36):
They made a big detour.
They made a big detour, okay.
So maybe my next topic shouldbe something about geography.

Speaker 2 (27:46):
Maybe your next topic should be read prior to this
reading.

Speaker 1 (27:54):
I haven't wrote this in three weeks ago.

Speaker 2 (27:56):
You've had it for a long time.
I get it.
I'd like to if we haven'talready said it on this podcast,
I'd like to bring a littleinsight to Kate.
She doesn't remember shit, soshe wrote this three weeks ago.
It might as well has been threeyears ago, because she has the
memory of uh, fucking ant yeahSomething.

(28:18):
Yeah, ferret, maybe an antferret.
Let's, let's combine them.

Speaker 1 (28:22):
New species, fuck Like a jackalope okay, so this
dessert yes okay, this tinydeserted island, yes, it's
called saint paul's island andit's in the indian ocean.

Speaker 2 (28:39):
Okay do you ever find it weird that deserted islands
have a fucking name?

Speaker 1 (28:42):
okay, they have a name but like they know it's
there but it's uninhabited, notnot?

Speaker 2 (28:48):
I get that unknown I get that uninhabited okay, but I
just find it funny because,like they have this, they're
like yeah, just call fuckingsaint paul.
Okay, put it on the map, sirokay get the cartographer.

Speaker 1 (29:02):
We need a new map so this place yeah, sorry no lush
landscapes, no sandy beaches,just rock jagged rock the
weather conditions weredescribed as cold and raw okay
constant threats of rain andwind and the island's

(29:24):
inaccessibility because of allthe rock Right and the constant
threat of the sea created thisprofound isolation and danger.
But we're not done on thisisland.

Speaker 2 (29:34):
I hope not.
St Paul, indian Ocean, not inRio.

Speaker 1 (29:39):
There were birds.

Speaker 2 (29:41):
How many birds?

Speaker 1 (29:42):
Not just any bird.

Speaker 2 (29:44):
Peacocks, albatrosses .
I fucking love albat, love elba.
There's a really good song by aband.
I'm drawing a blank on theirname of the band right now, give
me a sec, but their name, thename of the song, is albatross
wonderful.

Speaker 1 (29:55):
Okay, so in this book , in this book quote god damn it
.

Speaker 2 (30:01):
Why can't I remember the name of the band?
Wonderful fuck, that's gonnaannoy me.
The rest is goddamn.

Speaker 1 (30:07):
Episode now okay yes light taller says.
Quote it is a well-known factthat a that to a man fallen
overboard, yes, an albatross canand will drive his beak clean

(30:29):
through a man's skull whilstswooping past in the air End.
Quote Dear so massivealbatrosses, albatry.

Speaker 2 (30:46):
I have no idea, because albatross are fucking
huge.

Speaker 1 (30:50):
And they smell dinner Well yeah, they have, did you?

Speaker 2 (30:55):
I already know the answer.
I'm going to ask it anyways.
Have you ever seen what theirwingspan is?

Speaker 1 (31:01):
Let me go back to my Disney days.

Speaker 2 (31:04):
Disney.
Of the Resuers um was there analbatross in the rescuers?

Speaker 1 (31:09):
yeah, the little mice got on the albatross is that
what the that?
Was their plane their plane.

Speaker 2 (31:18):
It's been a minute since I've watched I.
I love that movie as a kid,though um I mean rescuers down
under.

Speaker 1 (31:25):
Down Under was great as well, but the original.

Speaker 2 (31:28):
The original is so much better.
It was great when you go to thezoo, the Milwaukee County Zoo,
they're in the.
I think it's the birdhouse,whatever.

Speaker 1 (31:38):
Apiary Aviary.

Speaker 2 (31:40):
Apiary.
Why don't you look that upwhile I finish what it's saying,
what I was gonna say, apiarythat's a beehive, god damn it.

Speaker 1 (31:49):
And you're a bee lover, shush, I don't have an
apiary.
I never said you did aviary.
Yeah, fine, it's aviary are yousure?

Speaker 2 (31:59):
did you look it up okay?

Speaker 1 (32:01):
apiaries, beads, bees , beads.
God, how many.
How much alcohol is in thisthing?

Speaker 2 (32:08):
5.6 or 7 I have no excuse, you really don't.
There's not much in there.
Continue, I don't fucking know.
Oh great, oh, you're like.
I hope he doesn't remember it.
Fuck he does.
Anyways, they have, um, like ona wall.
They have like a big board withdifferent birds on it with
their wingspan.
Yeah, and I remember alwaysseeing the albatross and it's

(32:31):
fucking huge.
Yeah, it's enormous.

Speaker 1 (32:33):
Bigger than the bald eagle, oh yeah.

Speaker 2 (32:37):
Oh, wow, yeah, like at least an inch bigger.

Speaker 1 (32:41):
And these little mice are like let's go go, albatross
I almost unalived a bald eagleonce driving.

Speaker 2 (32:49):
Oh, he fucking flew right in front of me.
What a dick.
Okay, let's move on americaokay yeah these albatross says
I'll try.
I'm sticking with it full-onavian assault Just death from
above.

Speaker 1 (33:04):
They trapped these people.
These sailors are trappedagainst a cliff.

Speaker 2 (33:09):
Sure.

Speaker 1 (33:09):
Cliff, and they're trying to defend themselves from
these birds.
Yeah, for the next half hour,oh shit.
It's an insane battle betweenman and bird.
Albatross's huge wings span 20feet ish give or take.
Oh so you do have it, 20 feetgive or take ish they are trying

(33:32):
to steal food right right andthey're diving at these sailors
faces.
Oh god, okay, so they're whack.
These sailors are whacking themwith sticks anything they can
find basically basically oh yeah, wow, they managed to knock one
down.

Speaker 2 (33:47):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (33:47):
And then stabbing the albatross with a knife, which
was the only way to keep themdown.

Speaker 2 (33:55):
Sure.

Speaker 1 (33:56):
What did they?
They finally had a little bitof food, I guess.

Speaker 2 (34:00):
Well, I mean, there's got to be a good amount of meat
on an albatross.
They're pretty fucking bigbirds, I guess.
Well, I mean there's got to bea good amount of meat on an
albatross.
They're pretty fucking bigbirds.

Speaker 1 (34:06):
I suppose.
But in this like messy, chaoticfight they actually managed to
hold on to the wet food they had, because the ship was going
down.
They had to save what they can,right.

Speaker 2 (34:15):
Well, yeah, they're trying for survival, so it makes
sense.

Speaker 1 (34:18):
They have a few battle scars.
I'm not going to lie.

Speaker 2 (34:21):
Well, right, beak through the face.
Sounds tragic, sounds fuckingterrible.
But eventually these sailorswere rescued after eight days.
Oh, so they're on the St PaulIsland that's uninhabited for
eight fucking days.

Speaker 1 (34:37):
And they eventually make it back to England.
Oh wow, at this time he's 16.

Speaker 2 (34:42):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (34:42):
So I did write that down 1888 to 1889.
After the disaster of Holy Hill.
Okay, so that's Holt Hill.
Sorry, Holy Hill is a place inWisconsin, it sure is.

Speaker 2 (34:55):
It's got a beautiful church.

Speaker 1 (34:57):
I'm going to rewrite that Holt Hill, don't now.

Speaker 2 (34:59):
Okay, hold, till Don't now.

Speaker 1 (35:02):
Okay, we are going to count how many sea disasters
Lightoller experiences.

Speaker 2 (35:10):
So we're at one.

Speaker 1 (35:11):
We're at one.
I'm guessing, there's at leasttwo, considering we're only on
page three.
Oh geez, Buckle in folks, we'rein for a wild ride Lightoller
goes back to his first ship, thePrimrose Hill.

Speaker 2 (35:25):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (35:26):
And he earns his second mate certificate.
So what does that entail?

Speaker 2 (35:33):
He has a bigger title , he's got a bigger certificate.
Sorry, I asked that question.

Speaker 1 (35:38):
And here, yes, on this, this day, this ship, oh,
primrose Hill, the second timearound yes, he encounters sharks
, oh dear.
And he's got the wounds toprove it.
Oh really, oh yeah, oh shit.
Yeah, he's been bitten bysharks what kind of?

Speaker 2 (35:57):
sharks, the ones that swim in the ocean, all of them
tell me a shark that swims onland and I will shut the fuck up
.

Speaker 1 (36:06):
Baby shark, whatever, yeah, okay, so I'm actually not
going to go into the wholeshark story because there's too
many stories to tell, but he haswrestled sharks, he's been
bitten by sharks and he'srescued other seamen from sharks
how do you think a taps outWith its dorsal fin or its tail
fin?
I would say maybe his snout.

Speaker 2 (36:28):
So can I say I am so glad that Vesper has never got
into baby shark.
Let's keep it that way, likeher big brother did.
Let's keep it that way.
Xavier loved that when he waslittle.
Super glad she has not.

Speaker 1 (36:42):
She knows of it, but she's not like baby shark
remember that video that shealways watched about the bunnies
, like the goodnight bunnies orsomething yeah that was in my
head for a while okay, anywaysso light holler yes after his
second mate, second matecertificate, yeah, and he gets

(37:04):
bitten by a shark.
He gets on the ship the nightof St Michael.

Speaker 2 (37:08):
So where did he get bit though Leg Arm?

Speaker 1 (37:11):
No, he's on the ship.

Speaker 2 (37:19):
He doesn't say I'd like to put this out there again
.
I think it was on his arm.
Anyone needs a podcast.

Speaker 1 (37:25):
Host shush okay, he's on.
He's on the ship night of thesaint michael so the shark
jumped on the ship.

Speaker 2 (37:35):
I'm still, I'm still confused.

Speaker 1 (37:36):
Okay, I'm kidding, keep going so the book that I
read is called Blank and OtherShips.
I'm leaving out the blankbecause it gives it away.
That's fine.
Blank and Other Ships Okay,he's talking about his life on
ships.
He gets bitten by a shark, butit's not about the shark, it's
about the ships?

Speaker 2 (37:56):
Did he die on the Titanic?

Speaker 1 (37:58):
No.

Speaker 2 (37:59):
Okay, just making sure.
No, that's a ship.

Speaker 1 (38:03):
Yes, okay.
So night of the St Michael ship.
They're hauling coal which,turn out, can just spontaneously
catch fire.
Oh boo, after weeks of brutalstorms, this is exactly what
happens.
Okay, the ship's beat up fromthe gales.
Now they've got this fuckingfire burning in the cargo hold

(38:27):
yeah, and how the fuck are yougonna put that out?
They're basically sailing thistime bomb, and then they don't
have enough lifeboats foranybody sounds like the titanic
sounds like it like tallerdescribes this constant, gnawing
fear.
They're all just waiting forthis ship to go up in flames.
They aren't sleeping.
Every creek, every whiff ofsmoke, everybody goes into a

(38:48):
panic.
They're all obsessed checkingthis fire, trying to keep it
under control right and becausethey're so short on lifeboats,
they're working like crazy tokeep the ship moving, hoping to
reach land before they're allcooked to death.
Well right, they're tweakingevery, they're trying to squeeze
out every last bit of speed.
It's super intense, super drawnout.
They've got this fire right,breathing down their neck

(39:09):
literally.
Finally they see land.
Oh, thank God.

Speaker 2 (39:16):
St Paul Island.

Speaker 1 (39:17):
Massive wave of relief.
I bet they're not going to burnafter all.
Well, potentially.
But Leard toller helped withthe fire, he put out the fire,
he helped put out the fire andhe got promoted again so what?

Speaker 2 (39:32):
what certificate did you get this time?
Fuck, if I know, okay by thetime he's 21 oh shit, we jumping
ahead, oh yeah.

Speaker 1 (39:39):
So that was like two ships, kind of yeah it, yeah it
didn't burn down, but it mightas well have, but he saved it.
By the time he's 21, he's seenmore out of life than most
people.
Yes, Okay, he leaves thesailing ships for steamships, oh

(40:00):
, but even then he almost kicksthe bucket from fucking malaria
off the west coast of africathat fucking malaria at one
point his temp was 106.2 degrees.
Oh jesus, fahrenheit, peoplewhat's it in celsius?

Speaker 2 (40:19):
bradley you brought up fahrenheit.
If anyone had to fuckingquestion that, I expected you to
have an answer for Celsius.
Hold, please.

Speaker 1 (40:30):
I don't wanna.

Speaker 2 (40:31):
Then don't.
Okay, I like how you pridedyourself.
I'm just gonna leave it at that.
Even the buffoon sign isattacking Kate for this.

(40:53):
Wow, can you fix it please?

Speaker 1 (41:01):
106 Fahrenheit is 41 degrees Celsius.
I could have told you that.

Speaker 2 (41:06):
Shut up.
I'm just kidding, I did notknow.

Speaker 1 (41:09):
This is a disaster of an episode.

Speaker 2 (41:12):
That's why it's great we're recording it.

Speaker 1 (41:15):
Okay, it's not a disaster.
His life is like a freakingadventure novel, like choose
your own adventure novel.
Have you ever had one of those?

Speaker 2 (41:23):
I used to love those when I was younger.
I couldn't tell you a name ofany of them, but yeah, I used.
We used to read those all thetime in like third, fourth,
fifth grade, whatever the fuckit was but, yeah, love those
okay, so after all these wildsea stories, yes, light taller,
settle down.
On a steamboat Exactly.

Speaker 1 (41:45):
He didn't go settle down.

Speaker 2 (41:46):
No.

Speaker 1 (41:47):
He decided to give up the water life for a little bit
.

Speaker 2 (41:52):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (41:53):
He got this crazy idea to go to the Yukon why?
Because he wanted to dig forgold a little bit, but it was a
total bust.

Speaker 2 (42:11):
There's this whole thing about him hitching a ride
from the Yukon to England.
What the fuck Okay.

Speaker 1 (42:15):
He eventually got back to England by 1899.
Total bust, it was like a yearof worthless bullshit.
So 1903, he's back on the water.
He meets his wife sylvia.

Speaker 2 (42:30):
Oh, sylvia, nice, she's an australian oh shit, I
mean kind of english in a wayroundabout way they headed off,
they get married in sydney andhe takes her to england.

Speaker 1 (42:40):
Oh nice, okay, so here we go, lie taller yes
spends nearly two decades ohshit, with the white star line
which made the titanic it didmake the titanic yes he was
primarily on the atlanticservice.
Oh 15 of those years yes werededicated to mail boats.

Speaker 2 (43:03):
Mail boats were essentially like past passenger
liners oh so not like theopposite of female boats maio I
got it.

Speaker 1 (43:15):
It was a poor joke, I admit it, but it was a joke
nonetheless but it was kind of ademanding experience even for
any resilient, experiencedsailor Sure, Particularly during
the harsh winters of the NorthAtlantic.

Speaker 2 (43:30):
Yeah, I can't imagine those were too easy.

Speaker 1 (43:32):
Ships grew larger, they grew faster, the dangers
were intensified, right, theincreased speed and size of the
vessels, which resulted in moresevere damage when they
encountered heavy seas.
Okay, and despite warnings tocaptains to exercise caution,

(43:52):
the force of the waves combinedwith the ship's velocities
increased hazardous situations.
Ooh Gotcha, ooh gotcha.
From second officer of theOceanic White Starling Oceanic
to first officer of the MajesticOkay, then temporarily chief of

(44:15):
the Majestic, oh, and then backagain, from second officer of
the Oceanic to first officer ofthe Oceanic Okay, again.
From second officer of theOceanic to first officer of the
Oceanic.

Speaker 2 (44:25):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (44:27):
Each one of those were like, little like over 15
years.
That's where his progressionwas.

Speaker 2 (44:33):
Over the course of that 15 years, 15 years.
Okay.

Speaker 1 (44:36):
Then yes.
March 1912.
Leitaler.

Speaker 2 (44:42):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (44:43):
Was assigned to the Titanic.
I feel like someone broughtthis up.
He didn't die.
That's what you asked.
He died on the Titanic.

Speaker 2 (44:53):
Did I say he died, something like that.

Speaker 1 (44:56):
Are you sure how I answered was correct though?

Speaker 2 (44:58):
It was truthful.
Either way it was truthful.
I was told I was wrong.
I need another Thunder Punch.

Speaker 1 (45:05):
All right, Hold, please Hold please, and we're
back.

Speaker 2 (45:11):
Sorry about that, I was thirsty.

Speaker 1 (45:15):
Okay, so he's on the Titanic in Belfast.

Speaker 2 (45:17):
What the fuck is going on with these cans.

Speaker 1 (45:19):
Did it spray again.

Speaker 2 (45:20):
Oh, my God, yes.

Speaker 1 (45:24):
Mine did too.

Speaker 2 (45:25):
I have to change my pants.

Speaker 1 (45:27):
All over.
They're so full.
Okay, look at how full this is,can you see?

Speaker 2 (45:33):
I can't, but I appreciate the attempt.

Speaker 1 (45:36):
Can you see?

Speaker 2 (45:38):
Holy shitballs.

Speaker 1 (45:39):
That's why, because they're so full, they're giving
us our money's worth Titanic.

Speaker 2 (45:50):
Titanic.

Speaker 1 (45:51):
He is the first officer.

Speaker 2 (45:53):
First officer.

Speaker 1 (45:54):
For the sea trials.
Okay, titanic, he is the firstofficer First officer For the
sea trials, okay, okay.
So the trials aim to test theTitanic's handling,
maneuverability, speed andoverall functionality.
Right, okay, but the sea trialsonly lasted about 12 hours, oh,
really, that's it Like I wouldexpect like days weeks.

Speaker 2 (46:12):
I would expect at least a week.

Speaker 1 (46:13):
The ship reached speeds just under 21 knots.

Speaker 2 (46:17):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (46:18):
And there was also a crash stop test which resulted
in the ship stopping at roughly850 yards.

Speaker 2 (46:26):
Wow, Is that good?

Speaker 1 (46:32):
And even for a seasoned sailor like him, the
ship was massive, right, massive, massive.
He later said it took him twofull weeks to even figure out
how to get around the thingefficiently.

Speaker 2 (46:44):
Oh shit, yeah.
Well, I mean, it was a hugefucking ship for them.

Speaker 1 (46:48):
Yeah, and just before they set sail, Captain Smith,
he shakes things up.
Captain Smith, he shakes thingsup, he brings in Henry Wilde
from the Olympic ship as chiefofficer.
Okay, which?
So if Charles Lightoller's here, William Murdoch is here as

(47:08):
chief officer.
Gotcha Right.
So Henry Wilde gets brought onas chief officer, which drops
down William Murdoch to firstofficer and Lightoller to second
officer.
Gotcha Okay?
So everybody was shifted downin rank.

Speaker 2 (47:27):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (47:27):
Okay, david Blair, who was the original second
officer, gets bumped off thevoyage entirely.

Speaker 2 (47:36):
Oh, that's got to.
I mean kind of good.

Speaker 1 (47:39):
But he had the key to the binocular case.

Speaker 2 (47:43):
He never gave that up .

Speaker 1 (47:44):
Nope, oh, it was probably an oversight.

Speaker 2 (47:48):
I'm sure it was yeah.

Speaker 1 (47:50):
So when the Titanic finally left Southampton,
lightoller's routine was prettyset it was 6 am to 10 am and 6
pm to 10 pm every morning andnight that he would be on watch.
So on the 14th of April he andthe other officers were chatting

(48:17):
about the Titanic's top speed,being curious about what she
could do.

Speaker 2 (48:23):
Yeah, seeing what she can handle.

Speaker 1 (48:25):
And Murdoch, william Murdoch, who is the chief
officer at this time.
He had the 10 am to 2 pm shiftor the 10 pm to 2 am shift.

Speaker 2 (48:36):
That sucks, that one would suck.

Speaker 1 (48:38):
But every time lunchtime would roll around,
lightoller would step in andgive him a break.
Okay.
So same way with Lightoller.
If he was on duty, someonewould relieve him so he could
have his meals Gotcha, okay,duty, someone would relieve him
so he could have his mealsgotcha, okay.
So when light taller stepped induring the 10 am 2 pm, watch

(48:59):
for murdoch to go have his meal.
Captain smith comes onto thebridge and mentions ice warnings
oh sure yeah yeah, and lighttaller said that was the first
time he had heard about it okayso when murdoch got, lightoller
told him that the captain'swarning told him about captain's
warning and Murdoch didn't seemsurprised.

(49:21):
But Lightoller got theimpression that it was kind of
new news to him as well.

Speaker 2 (49:25):
Sure.

Speaker 1 (49:26):
But Lightoller took over the watch at 6 pm, just
like he normally would, and thenMurdoch relieved him for dinner
.
Ah yeah, it's just.

Speaker 2 (49:36):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (49:36):
Why won't you have dinner early, whatever?

Speaker 2 (49:38):
Either way.

Speaker 1 (49:39):
Yeah, at 9 pm Captain Smith and Lightoller were on
the bridge agreeing that theyshould see any ice well in
advance.
Sure Smith left, telling him tolet him know if anything seemed
off.
Then Lightoller told anothermate to call the lookouts in the
crow's nest, telling them tokeep a sharp lookout for ice,

(50:00):
especially small ice andgrowlers.

Speaker 2 (50:05):
Okay, what's a growler?

Speaker 1 (50:06):
They are small fragments of ice and are roughly
the size of a truck or like agrand piano.
Decent, size still Decent, butsmall, obviously not an iceberg
like a grand piano decent size,still obviously not an iceberg.

Speaker 2 (50:17):
Yeah, yeah, definitely still decent size
light, wow I also had thequartermaster check the fresh
water supply.

Speaker 1 (50:25):
Okay for any signs of freezing oh sure that would
indicate they are heading intoan ice field I think that's
brilliant.

Speaker 2 (50:34):
I mean, I guess that that makes sense because, I
guess I wouldn't have thought ofthat.

Speaker 1 (50:39):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (50:40):
Wow Okay.

Speaker 1 (50:41):
Yeah, hey, we got a fresh water tank in the basement
, the basement.
The basement, the cellar, ifyou will.

Speaker 2 (50:48):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (50:49):
The third passenger, third class passenger, cellars.

Speaker 2 (50:55):
The coach.
I'm just going to keep drinking.
I'm just going to keep drinking.
I think that's wise for all ofus involved in this podcast.

Speaker 1 (51:03):
So, yes.
He okay, Leichthaler was on hislast bridge watch before the
collision.
We all know what happened tothe Titanic.
Right, he handed over toMurdoch at 10pm telling him
about the course and the icefield that they were approaching
, expected to be in the areaaround 11pm.

Speaker 2 (51:22):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (51:23):
He wished Murdoch joy of his watch.
Like, have a good night.
Joy of the watch, wow, andheaded to bed.
He was getting ready for bedwhen he felt the impact.

Speaker 2 (51:34):
Sure.
He thought it was the ice, buthe stayed put because he was
going to bed well, that's wherepeople could find him well,
because that's where he said hewas going yeah, so if he's out
walking around, they're notgoing to be able to find and
they're going to go look for himlike where the fuck is this guy
?

Speaker 1 (51:52):
yeah the engine stopped, he went out on deck in
his pajamas to see what wasgoing on, talked to one of the
mates, then he went back to thiscabin again, waiting to be
found, essentially or to be toldwhat to do next, or whatever,
yeah another came.
Another mate came by and toldhim that they hit an iceberg, so
it was confirmed.
Finally, um, and that the mailroom was flooding.

(52:14):
Ma aisle mail room was floodingand that got light taller
moving oh sure he threw on someclothes, his overcoat.

Speaker 2 (52:23):
He still didn't believe that the ship was in any
real danger well, if you watchthe movie, especially wink wink,
not a lot of people thoughtwhich light is portrayed in that
movie is he?

Speaker 1 (52:35):
I'll tell you about later.
All right, light holler gets upon the boat deck and it's just
chaos.
Steam is hissing everywhere.
You could hardly hear yourselfthink he takes charge of getting
the lifeboats lowered on theport side.
Okay, okay, he's interpretingcaptain Smith's orders Women and

(52:55):
children only yes, verystrictly.
They can't hear each other.
They are mouthing these wordsessentially, so this meant that
Lightoller was launchinglifeboats with empty seats if
there were not women andchildren nearby.
Isn't that wild?
Yes, and he was like thinkinglike once they hit the water,

(53:19):
they'll just come by this.
No, that's not not so much it'schaos.
They're not gonna know rightthat's not the way people's
reactions are it's just, that'snot yeah, there was one
exception a lieutenant colonelpuchin puchin, that is a funky

(53:42):
name light taller.
Let him in a boat because hehad sailing experience and he
offered to help, which wascrucial.
Yeah, since they were short onexperienced seamen right, they
were short, unexperienced.
Semen Right, they were worriedabout Davits.

Speaker 2 (53:57):
What is that?

Speaker 1 (53:58):
D-A-V-I-T-S Davits, which were those lowering
mechanisms.

Speaker 2 (54:03):
Oh sure, because they were all kind of funky.
They kind of even went overthat in the movie a little bit.

Speaker 1 (54:08):
Yeah, they were thinking that they wouldn't be
able to hold a full, fully Astocked boat basically yeah, no,
I know what you're saying yes,exactly yeah so they didn't
realize that the titanic'sdavids were actually designed
for the capacity that thelifeboats were supposed to have
oh gotcha so light.

(54:29):
Taller's plan was to fill theboats from the water line, which
which I can see where he wouldget that idea.
Yeah, so he actually sent 10 mendown to open the gangway doors,
like where people would walk upthe gang.
So it's a little more waterlevel.
Yeah, Kind of To get passengersaccess right Right, right right

(54:49):
.
None of these men made it.
Oh really, the 10 of them.
None of them made it.
Urgh, None of these men made it.
Oh really, the ten of them.
None of them made it.
Yeah, the boats once lowered,pulled away half empty, ignoring
orders to come back.
The plan just didn't work out.
At one point, Lightoller asksabout firearms.

Speaker 2 (55:10):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (55:11):
Lightoller takes Burdock and Smith to get the
revolvers.
He gets one for himself andsome ammunition, though he later
admits he never actually loadedthe gun.

Speaker 2 (55:23):
Isn't Burdock.

Speaker 1 (55:25):
Murdoch.

Speaker 2 (55:25):
Was it Murdoch?

Speaker 1 (55:26):
With an M.

Speaker 2 (55:28):
Wasn't he also portrayed in the movie?
He was.

Speaker 1 (55:39):
Yeah, was, yeah, so light taller has a scene where
he's actually talking to victorgarber, who is thomas.
Thomas, andrews, mr andrews,he's the designer of titanic
right played by victor garberand andrews comes up to light.
Taller andoller.
These boats are only halffilled.
What's going on?

Speaker 2 (55:56):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (55:57):
And Lightoller is like these boats might buckle.

Speaker 2 (56:01):
I remember that scene .

Speaker 1 (56:02):
Yep, that's Lightoller.

Speaker 2 (56:03):
Okay, gotcha, nice, yes, gotcha.

Speaker 1 (56:05):
Okay, so Lightoller then helps pull out boat
collapsible D as in dog out boatcollapsible d as in dog to.

Speaker 2 (56:19):
And he, he actually pulls out his gun during this
unloading of the boat to to geta group of men to back off.

Speaker 1 (56:22):
Yeah, yes.
So, as the titanic was goingdown, light hauler tried to
launch a boat, collapsible b asin boy, from the port side.
Okay, and it's one of thosesmaller canvas lifeboats oh
Mm-hmm, but it flipped upsidedown onto the deck.

Speaker 2 (56:39):
Oh dear.

Speaker 1 (56:40):
He then went over the starboard side to see if he
could help there.
But a huge wave washed over theboat deck and realized it was
kind of pointless to stay overthere.
So instead of sticking around,he dove overboard from the
officer's quarters roof into theocean.
So he like climbs on top ofthis like officer's quarters.

Speaker 2 (57:03):
Yeah, and just Goes in the ocean.

Speaker 1 (57:06):
You know 10 point dive into you know.

Speaker 2 (57:08):
What's a nine point dive?
I don't fucking know.
All right.

Speaker 1 (57:10):
Okay.
He described the water asfeeling like a thousand knives.

Speaker 2 (57:16):
I mean, it was fucking cold.
I mean, jack froze so hesurfaced.

Speaker 1 (57:23):
Okay, he saw the crow's nest level with the water
, oh Jesus.
He started swimming towards it,but then remembered it's safer
to stay away from the sinkingship.

Speaker 2 (57:34):
Right.

Speaker 1 (57:35):
And then he got sucked underwater.

Speaker 2 (57:38):
Yep.

Speaker 1 (57:39):
And he was rushed on a ventilator.
Oh shit, Really.
He was trapped against agrating for a little while until
a blast of hot air from insidethe ship blew him back up to the
surface.

Speaker 2 (57:53):
No way, really, really, holy shit, really,
really, holy shit.
That's fortunate.

Speaker 1 (57:57):
He got pulled down again, but he managed to force
his way up.

Speaker 2 (58:00):
So what do you and I'm not saying this is part of
your research, but what do youthink that blast of air was from
?

Speaker 1 (58:06):
Probably just an explosion of some type Within
the ship, kind of thing.

Speaker 2 (58:11):
Yeah, holy balls, he got lucky.

Speaker 1 (58:13):
So he realized his heavy revolver was actually
dragging him underwater.
So he let it go, so he ditchedit so somewhere in the heart of
the ocean, and his revolver isat the bottom of the ocean.

Speaker 2 (58:23):
I wonder if they're hanging out together.
Probably I don't really thinkthe heart of the ocean is really
in there, but I think that wasa movie.

Speaker 1 (58:29):
So he saw a collapsible bee Can.
So he saw Collapsible B Can.

Speaker 2 (58:32):
I say something real quick.
I literally just saw this.
Yeah, do you know who was up?
One of the people who wasactually up for Jack Dawson in
that movie, and it makes totalsense why he didn't get it.
James Gandolfini was originallyconsidered for that role.
In what?

(58:53):
1997 it came out right.
Do you not know who he is?
What are you smiling for?

Speaker 1 (58:59):
because that's awful it's an awful choice.

Speaker 2 (59:02):
Well, it wasn't an awful choice because they didn't
go with him and it basically itsaid I literally just saw this
like two or three days ago, andit said that his um overall
demeanor basically I don'tremember the wording they used
is like holy fuck, this guy islike scary, let's not do that.
Basically is what they weresaying.

(59:24):
But holy shit, could that wouldhave been a completely
different movie I think it wouldbe wow, so yeah, anyways okay
so he ditches his revolver.

Speaker 1 (59:32):
He sees boat, collapsible B, floating upside
down near him.
And people were clinging to it.
He swam over and held onto arope.
Just then the Titanic's forwardfunnel broke off.
Oh, the stack.
The stack Slammed into thewater, washing the collapsible

(59:52):
further away.

Speaker 2 (59:54):
Isn't that the one that crushed his little friend?

Speaker 1 (59:56):
Yeah, it comes a little bit later, but yes, okay,
this is the first one that felland it did kill several people.

Speaker 2 (01:00:03):
I like how we're like .
Isn't that the one who killedthis person?
We're talking about a movie.
It didn't really kill him, yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:00:09):
This one yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:00:10):
Anyways.

Speaker 1 (01:00:10):
but yes, Fabriz, Anyways but yes, vabritio, yes,
yes yes.
Vabritio.

Speaker 2 (01:00:14):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (01:00:15):
So he climbed onto the overturned boat and took
charge claiming and organizingthe 30 or so survivors that were
holding onto this boat.

Speaker 2 (01:00:23):
Wow Okay, good for him.

Speaker 1 (01:00:25):
He had them yell boat ahoy in unison.

Speaker 2 (01:00:28):
Ahoy.

Speaker 1 (01:00:29):
Mm-hmm, to try to get people to come help them.

Speaker 2 (01:00:36):
Did you know that?

Speaker 1 (01:00:37):
when they invented the phone they wanted this.

Speaker 2 (01:00:39):
They said ahoy, yeah, yeah, something like that okay.

Speaker 1 (01:00:41):
So during the night a swell came up and he caught
taught them how to like shifttheir weight right.
So they're all on top of thisupturned boat and light color is
like showing the men, women,women and children, whomever's
on top, how to shift theirweight to keep the boat from

(01:01:01):
going under essentially Okaysure.
And as Don broke, he used hisofficer's whistle to attract the
attention of other lifeboats.
Yeah, Lifeboats 4 and 12eventually rode over and rescued
them after hearing his whistlethat he kept on him.
Oh and finally, the shipcarpathia came and light hauler

(01:01:22):
was the very last survivor to bepulled aboard every time I hear
about the ship of the carpathia, I just think of dracula.

Speaker 2 (01:01:30):
So he's from the carpathian mountains mountains.

Speaker 1 (01:01:32):
Yeah.
So after it all, he wrote abouthis experience in the christian
science journal, crediting hisfaith for his survival and
saying with god, all things arepossible, so being the highest
ranking survivor oh out ofeverybody, he was the highest to
to to survive.

(01:01:53):
That makes sense, lightollerfound himself smack dabble in
the middle of smack dab in themiddle.

Speaker 2 (01:02:00):
I like smack dabble.

Speaker 1 (01:02:02):
Smack dabble.

Speaker 2 (01:02:03):
That might be the episode title Smack dabble.

Speaker 1 (01:02:06):
Smack dabble.
He was in both the American andthe British inquiries.

Speaker 2 (01:02:12):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (01:02:13):
Okay.
So he did not mince words aboutthe American one.
He called it a farce.
Oh, mostly because he thoughtthat they were pretty clueless
about some of the questions thatthey were asking.

Speaker 2 (01:02:27):
Sure, I guess.

Speaker 1 (01:02:28):
The British inquiry, though, he took a lot more
seriously, and he even admittedthat he had to keep one's hand
on the whitewash brush, whichbasically means that he had to
be careful to avoid puttingblame on the british board, sure
board of trade or the whitestar line.
Okay, oh dear.
So even though he, as he put it, he knew for a few years that

(01:02:49):
this disaster was always aboutno, even though, as he put it,
he knew for years that adisaster like this was always
possible okay based on the typeof ship, his experiences, etc
man.

Speaker 2 (01:03:03):
That's pretty insightful if he thought it was
possible, because we're alwaystold and taught and led to
believe that titanic was anunsinkable unsink ship, which is
a really bold fucking claim,because you could literally
fucking sink anything.
So I mean for him to see thatat that time is pretty

(01:03:27):
remarkable, honestly.

Speaker 1 (01:03:29):
So all right, so he pinned the blame on the
incredibly calm seas of thenight okay and the fact that the
icebergs didn't give any typeof warning signs, like like
water breaks right, yeah, youcould see the ripples, for sure,
like there wasn't even thatlike a t-rex walking towards you

(01:03:49):
in a cup.
Yeah, so I I wrote about verybriefly, I wrote about a video
that I saw years ago and I Ireferenced it here.
It's called titanic's finalmystery okay and it's all
hypothetical.
It's all theory, sure, but theyare historians and scientists

(01:04:10):
are replaying the night of thesinking.

Speaker 2 (01:04:13):
Right.

Speaker 1 (01:04:13):
And they figured out that they think, based on
journals and eyewitness accounts, that the iceberg was actually
a mirage.

Speaker 2 (01:04:23):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (01:04:24):
Because the night was so calm.

Speaker 2 (01:04:27):
Right.

Speaker 1 (01:04:29):
And you know when you're in a desert and you can
hardly tell the differencebetween desert and like the sky.

Speaker 2 (01:04:34):
Sky, basically yeah, yeah, yeah, and then you could.
You could like see things in adistance, but it's not really
there that's what the scientistsand the historians think might
have happened that night yeah, Ihang out in deserts a lot, so I
know what you're talking aboutokay, so I'm not sure where this
video is.

Speaker 1 (01:04:52):
I know what you mean, though.

Speaker 2 (01:04:53):
Yeah because you even see it like when you're driving
on a on a hot summer day andyou see in the distance on the
road.
Even you're like what the fuckis going on.

Speaker 1 (01:05:01):
You see like shadows and you're like, oh, there's
like a puddle of water up there.
It's like, Nope, it's just ashadow.

Speaker 2 (01:05:06):
Exactly so I know a hundred percent what you're
talking about.

Speaker 1 (01:05:09):
So they think that a mirage happened and that's why
they didn't see the icebergGotcha.
Because, it was such a clearnight you couldn't tell the
difference between the ocean andthe sky Well, especially at
night like that, with it beingso dark, obviously the water's.

Speaker 2 (01:05:23):
Jesus Christ, I think he was jumping out at you
Buffoon, buffoon.

Speaker 1 (01:05:31):
So he was really I'm kidding Jesus Christ.
Alright.
Yeah, it's right.
Yeah, it's fine, it's fine,everything's fine.
So he light hauler did a reallygood job of defending his
employer, the white star line,even though they were getting
heat well, I mean, can you blamethem?
Excessive speed, right missing,missing binoculars, yep Sailing

(01:05:52):
through an ice field who doesthis Interestingly?
Yes, years later.

Speaker 2 (01:06:00):
Years later, in the 1936 BBC radio program.
Okay.

Speaker 1 (01:06:06):
He changed his tune.
Oh why he did finally admitsome company faults.

Speaker 2 (01:06:12):
Well, of course.

Speaker 1 (01:06:14):
But, what were they?
He didn't really say what, whatthe what.
He used the public outrage tokind of push for changes in
maritime history.
Okay, sorry, maritime safety,sure, or history After this,

(01:06:36):
yeah, history after this, yeah,and a lot of his recommendations
, um, like lifeboat capacitylifeboat drills, yeah.
24-hour radio communication,mandatory ice warnings sure they
were all adopted by maritimenations makes sense, I get that
so he really helped make thingssafer, sure.
He did, however, get prettyannoyed with some of the
questions that they asked duringthese inquiries.

Speaker 2 (01:06:58):
I'm not surprised.

Speaker 1 (01:06:59):
Like?
One of the questions that wasasked was did the falling funnel
hurt anyone?

Speaker 2 (01:07:08):
No, come on, it just crushed him gently.
So, what the fuck.
After Fabrizio Okay, I was justgonna say like at least they
didn't ask him if Could.

Speaker 1 (01:07:22):
Jack have fit on the door.

Speaker 2 (01:07:24):
Yes, he could have.

Speaker 1 (01:07:25):
After the.
Everybody knows he fuckingcould have fit on that door I
know, Anyways, after the Titanic, lytler, fucking idiot went
back to the white star line.
Okay, and he served as a mateon the oceanic, okay in 1913 he
got promoted to the royal navyreserve, moving up to lieutenant

(01:07:45):
all right, he's moving up stillokay yes world war one.
Okay, so how many ships is thatThree?

Speaker 2 (01:07:53):
Roughly yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:07:56):
When World War I broke out.

Speaker 2 (01:07:57):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (01:07:58):
He was called up for duty.
I have to pee so bad.

Speaker 2 (01:08:03):
Are we taking a break ?

Speaker 1 (01:08:05):
But wouldn't you know it?
Okay, he was back on theoceanic, but this time it was
the HMS oceanic.

Speaker 2 (01:08:13):
Fucking A right.
It was An armed merchantcruiser.

Speaker 1 (01:08:17):
Oh, it's no longer a passenger boat, it is.

Speaker 2 (01:08:22):
Lethal.

Speaker 1 (01:08:22):
It's lethal.

Speaker 2 (01:08:23):
Weaponized.

Speaker 1 (01:08:24):
Exactly.

Speaker 2 (01:08:25):
Fucking A right.

Speaker 1 (01:08:26):
Yes, new role, same ship.

Speaker 2 (01:08:33):
What year did World War I start?
Was that 1911?

Speaker 1 (01:08:36):
Oh, shibibbles, I want to say 1912.

Speaker 2 (01:08:38):
But well, no, I'm sorry, I'm not not 11, because
you were.
The titanic sunk in 12, so wasthat fuck?
Why am I drawing a blank onthis?
1914, 14, 1914, 1914, 1914 19181918 god damn.
Anyways, I don't know why.

Speaker 1 (01:08:57):
Yeah, if I just keep reading, he served as first
officer, with David Blair, whowas pushed off the Titanic
remember?
Yeah, he was the second manthat got pushed off right he
served as first officer withDavid Blair, but then the ship
ran aground and was wrecked onthe Chaldafula in 1914.

(01:09:22):
It is an island in the ShetlandIslands.
Don't ask me for more.
It's between the United Kingdomand Norway.
They are islands, don't ask memore.
It happened in 1914.
This is boat number four.

Speaker 2 (01:09:33):
Is this near Rio?
Stop it Boat number four.

Speaker 1 (01:09:34):
This is boat number four.
Is this near Rio?
Stop it.
Boat number four.

Speaker 2 (01:09:36):
Yes, boat number four .

Speaker 1 (01:09:37):
Lightoller being Lightoller was last off the ship
.
Grabbed the navigation roomclock as a souvenir.

Speaker 2 (01:09:45):
Oh, okay.

Speaker 1 (01:09:48):
Come on.

Speaker 2 (01:09:49):
What.

Speaker 1 (01:09:51):
Four ships.

Speaker 2 (01:09:54):
I feel like he should stop sailing.

Speaker 1 (01:09:58):
What is the common denominator here?
Come on.

Speaker 2 (01:10:01):
Lightoller.

Speaker 1 (01:10:02):
Lightoller, hello, hello, 1915.

Speaker 2 (01:10:05):
Fucking Chuck.

Speaker 1 (01:10:06):
I'm not even fucking done.
1915.
He was first officer on thetrials of the Campania, which
had been turned into an aircraftcarrier.

Speaker 2 (01:10:17):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (01:10:18):
Later that year he got his own command on the
torpedo boat HMTB-117.

Speaker 2 (01:10:27):
Torpedo 2.

Speaker 1 (01:10:29):
He earned the Distinguished Service Cross for
a pretty daring night battlewith a Zeppelin.

Speaker 2 (01:10:37):
With a Zeppelin.

Speaker 1 (01:10:38):
L-3-1.
Wow yeah, he and his crew setup an ambush, waited until the
Zeppelin was right above themand then opened fire with tracer
rounds, hitting its tail andforcing it to retreat.
That got him promoted tocaptain of the HMS Falcon, a
torpedo boat destroyer.

(01:11:00):
For the next two years he wason the Dover patrol, protecting
the straits and fighting offGerman destroyers.

Speaker 2 (01:11:08):
Was that like in the cliffs of Dover?

Speaker 1 (01:11:10):
We'll say that he ran a very tight ship, guns always
loaded, expecting his men to beready for anything.

Speaker 2 (01:11:18):
Well, I mean, that sounds like a normal fucking
thing, but all right,Unfortunately, oh dear.

Speaker 1 (01:11:25):
Guess what happened.

Speaker 2 (01:11:27):
Sink Hit an iceberg.

Speaker 1 (01:11:28):
Falcon sink the.
Falcon sank in 1918, after acollision in fog with a trawler,
which is a large fishing boatthat was fitted for naval
purposes.
Okay, boat number five.

Speaker 2 (01:11:42):
Jesus Christ, this dude needs to get off the
fucking sea.
You see, holy shit.

Speaker 1 (01:11:49):
On April 1st 1918, the vessel collided with an
armed trawler, hms JohnFitzgerald.
1918.
The vessel collided with anarmed trawler, hms john
fitzgerald okay.
The collision occurred in densefog, which significantly
reduced visibility.
Visibility you don't say afterthe result of the collision, the
hms falcon sustained criticaldamage and sank jesus christ his

(01:12:11):
crew was taken away in atrawler.
Yeah, and when the ship finallysank hours later, Light Hauler
2 finally got off the ship Again.
He's like the last one off theship.

Speaker 2 (01:12:19):
How?
Because he was getting anotherfucking souvenir.
Probably, I mean I need anotherclock.

Speaker 1 (01:12:25):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:12:25):
What the fuck man.

Speaker 1 (01:12:27):
But a different light , a different trawler rescued
him because of this fuckingwhistle.

Speaker 2 (01:12:32):
Trawler Light.
Hauler him because of thisfucking whistle.

Speaker 1 (01:12:38):
Trawler light, holler light, taller light, trawler
light taller right trawler, yes,night trawler light taller was
cleared in in any court martialand actually where it was
commended for staying on boarduntil the crew were just.
They were just like did youfucking do anything?

Speaker 2 (01:12:51):
no, okay we got you.
Yeah, all right, fair enough.

Speaker 1 (01:12:53):
They're just going through the motions at that
point okay, gotcha okay then,yes, he got five ships, right
five.
He then got command of hms garyg-a-r-r-y fucking gary, another
destroyer.
June 1918 light hauler,commanded Gary, had a pretty
dramatic run-in with a GermanU-boat, the UB-110, captained by

(01:13:19):
Werner Feuerbringer.

Speaker 2 (01:13:23):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (01:13:24):
Werner Feuerbringer.

Speaker 2 (01:13:25):
It's like the bringer of fears.

Speaker 1 (01:13:28):
A periscope broke the surface.

Speaker 2 (01:13:31):
Oh geez.

Speaker 1 (01:13:32):
Of the water.

Speaker 2 (01:13:33):
Yeah, bloop, bloop, bloop bloop, bloop, bloop.
Bloop, bloop.
Okay, continue.
I need more of this.
Oh my god, so do I.
I'm out.

Speaker 1 (01:13:47):
Or should it be bloop , bloop, bloop.
It's probably that Bloop bloop,bloop, bloop.
It's probably that Blah, blah,blah, blah, blah, blah.
Okay, the periscope broke thesurface.

Speaker 2 (01:14:04):
Yes, you mentioned that.
Yeah, we got that far.

Speaker 1 (01:14:07):
Positioned for a torpedo strike.

Speaker 2 (01:14:10):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (01:14:10):
Light hauler ordered full speed and dropped depth
charges, depth charges yes,lightoller ordered full speed
and dropped depth charges.

Speaker 2 (01:14:16):
Depth charges yes.

Speaker 1 (01:14:18):
The submarine, forced to surface, became a target
Makes sense.
A direct hit from the forwardgun prevented its escape and
Lightoller ordered the ship toram the submarine.

Speaker 2 (01:14:33):
Why?
Because five sunken ships isnot enough.

Speaker 1 (01:14:43):
You're not fucking wrong.
Here's number six.
The first collision causeddamage to both vessels.
Undeterred, he rammed it again,striking the UB-110.
The destroyer was criticallydamaged.

Speaker 2 (01:14:59):
No shit.

Speaker 1 (01:15:00):
Lightoller was like hmm.

Speaker 2 (01:15:02):
Mistake.

Speaker 1 (01:15:03):
Beached, the ship head to the nearest port,
attempt to return to the strait,where they can dock Find an
iceberg, whatever.
They opted for returning to thestrait, where a river and an
ocean meet.
It's called the Humber.

Speaker 2 (01:15:23):
The Humber Humber Like H-U-M-ber, yes, okay.

Speaker 1 (01:15:27):
It's a strait where the river and ocean meet and
they can dock there in Englandor sink Either way.
Yeah, or sink Either way, yeah,so they opted for that.

Speaker 2 (01:15:38):
Please tell me he doesn't get on any more ships.
I can't, oh shit.

Speaker 1 (01:15:43):
Come on.
The journey was fraught withtension.
The ship's conditiondeteriorated upon arrival the
bow was submerged, the stern wasraised, the damage extensive.

Speaker 2 (01:15:57):
Oh my God.

Speaker 1 (01:15:58):
Can we just say this is boat number six.

Speaker 2 (01:16:01):
We can, because holy fuck.

Speaker 1 (01:16:03):
Boat number six Lightoller got a bar for his
distinguished service crossed.

Speaker 2 (01:16:11):
I feel like they need to start taking shit away from
this fucktard, holy crap.
What is going on with all thefucking chaos that he is on a
ship service crossed?
I feel like they need to starttaking shit away from this
fucktard, holy crap.
What is going on with all thefucking chaos that he is?

Speaker 1 (01:16:19):
on a ship let's sink it, motherfuckers, holy balls
light holler was promoted toacting lieutenant commander in
july damn, they're stupid andwas placed on the retired list
good on march 31st of 1919 withthe rank of commander okay so
even though light teller hadbeen a loyal employee, employee

(01:16:42):
of the white star line, and hadreally gone to bat for them
during the titanic inquiries,yeah, he found his career had
kind of hit a dead end after thewar well, sure, I mean turns
out, being connected to thetitanic disaster wasn't a great
thing to have.
I can't imagine it would bedisheartened he resigned.

(01:17:03):
He tried his hand at a bunch ofdifferent things like innkeeper
, chicken farmer, propertyspeculation, whatever whatever
word you're trying to say there.
It's actually spelledspeculation.

Speaker 2 (01:17:17):
I trusted you Inspection.
No, let's go with speculation.

Speaker 1 (01:17:20):
Okay, Maybe it was inspection, but I wrote down the
word speculation In the early1930s he wrote his autobiography
called I Sink Ships Gee.

Speaker 2 (01:17:33):
I think that might be the title.
I Sink Ships Gee.
I think that might be the title.
I Sink Ships.

Speaker 1 (01:17:42):
This book is called Titanic and Other Ships and
that's why earlier I said Blinkand Other Ships.

Speaker 2 (01:17:48):
Yeah, I get it.

Speaker 1 (01:17:49):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:17:50):
I'd like to say I did call that, you did, and I think
I Sink Ships is the title hiswife basically nagged him to
write this book ah, the duty ofa good wife.

Speaker 1 (01:18:04):
And it ended up being a pretty good hit.
Well, big hit yeah it didn'tsink any ships did it, it really
didn't oh, fuck, yeah, wow sothere was a little bit of a
mystery with the book yeahsylvia claimed it was pulled
from shelves why, because themarconi company threatened to

(01:18:25):
sue him over a comment he madeabout the titanic's.
Marconi operators were trainedto send and receive Morse code
on the Titanic using Marconiequipment.

Speaker 2 (01:18:42):
Okay, I feel like that's a stretch there but all
right.

Speaker 1 (01:18:45):
But nobody found any proof of that.

Speaker 2 (01:18:46):
Yeah, right, of course.

Speaker 1 (01:18:48):
Lightoller did lay a lot of blame on Jack Phillips,
the senior Marconi operator, forallegedly not delivering an ice
warning.
See, that's different.
That could have prevented thesinking.

Speaker 2 (01:18:58):
You're blaming a person, not a company equipment
or whatever.

Speaker 1 (01:19:02):
Yes, exactly.

Speaker 2 (01:19:03):
Yeah, that's way fucking different, Right.
But okay, I get it yes.

Speaker 1 (01:19:07):
Okay.
So even in retirement, Lytlercould not give up the sea.

Speaker 2 (01:19:12):
He sunk more ships.

Speaker 1 (01:19:14):
No.

Speaker 2 (01:19:14):
Did he go out fishing and be like fuck honey.
I don't know where the boatwent.
I was on it one minute, jesusChrist.

Speaker 1 (01:19:20):
He bought himself a yacht.

Speaker 2 (01:19:23):
A yacht.

Speaker 1 (01:19:24):
He called it the Sundowner in 1929.
Okay, in early 1939.
It sank.
It sank.
The admiralty, okay,commissioned him to use the
sundowner to snoop around thegerman coast, taking pictures
and gathering intel on theirneedle installations so he was

(01:19:44):
kind of a spy then comes dunkirkoh shit, really may 1940 light
taller, along with his oldestson, roger, and a sea scout
named Gerald Ashcroft, took theSundowner across the channel to
help with the evacuation atfucking Dunkirk Really yes.

Speaker 2 (01:20:04):
That's wild.

Speaker 1 (01:20:06):
In a boat licensed for 21 people.

Speaker 2 (01:20:10):
Yeah, he fit 120.

Speaker 1 (01:20:12):
He brought back 127 British servicemen.
I was seven off holy fuck.

Speaker 2 (01:20:17):
That's amazing.

Speaker 1 (01:20:18):
Look at me go yes wow , that's wild though on the way
back, they even dodged gunfirefrom german aircraft not
surprised there.
No, holy shit gerald ashcroftremembered a stuka dive bomber
attacking them.
Light taller stood on the bowkeeping an eye on it.
At the last second he heardHard apart and they turned

(01:20:40):
sharply One of the directionsbecause I don't know which
approach.

Speaker 2 (01:20:43):
I always forget port and starboard.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:20:46):
Just as the bomb landed on their starboard side.

Speaker 2 (01:20:48):
Oh dear.

Speaker 1 (01:20:50):
But after Dunkirk Lightoller didn't hang up his
hat entirely.
He was put in charge of a smallarmed vessel patrolling the
river Blackwater in Essex.

Speaker 2 (01:21:03):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (01:21:03):
During an invasion period in 1940 to 1941.

Speaker 2 (01:21:07):
Sure.

Speaker 1 (01:21:08):
Then he was ferrying arms and ammunition for the
Royal Army Service Corps.
Wow, right up until the warended.

Speaker 2 (01:21:15):
Sure.

Speaker 1 (01:21:16):
After the war he settled down a bit, but he
stayed closer to the water, Ofcourse.
He ran a small boatyard inTwickenham, West London, called
Richmond Slipways.

Speaker 2 (01:21:30):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (01:21:31):
They built motor launches for river police.

Speaker 2 (01:21:34):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (01:21:34):
So he was still very much involved in, like maritime
life.
Sure Leithaler died of chronicheart disease on December 8th
1952, age 78.

Speaker 2 (01:21:45):
I say yeah, he lived pretty long then.

Speaker 1 (01:21:48):
And it was actually during London's Great Smog of
1952.
Not the Great Smog His body wascremated and his ashes were
scattered at the commonwealthgarden of remembrance at mort
lake crematorium in richmondsurrey now I understand that the
british people will probablyunderstand a little bit of that.

Speaker 2 (01:22:07):
I don't, but that's fine do you find it weird that
they didn't put some of hisashes?
In the ocean yeah, because Imean, that's what his whole
fucking life was.

Speaker 1 (01:22:17):
Basically we didn't come up with it.
I don't know I mean whatever butI'm gonna quote the last part
here.
I'm gonna quote from his booktitanic and other ships.
All right quote, for my part ofgoing to sea was just a bluff,
but it worked.
I hear some say, to my sorrow,not a bit of it.
The sea is a hard, unrelentingmistress, always ready to whip

(01:22:42):
up the fools.
As I was soon to discover, shetried to drown me several times,
yet I beat her.
She nearly broke my neck onmore than one occasion.
But we still remain the best offriends and I never regret that
my bluff was called Wow.
That is the story of CharlesLightoller and his book that I

(01:23:02):
read, titanic and Other Ships,and his crazy ass.
Six fucking sinkings of shipswhat?

Speaker 2 (01:23:12):
the fuck Fucking Chuck.

Speaker 1 (01:23:19):
Six what the fuck the fuck fucking chuck.
Six what the fuck chuck.

Speaker 2 (01:23:21):
So I was anticipating they're like five, and then I
was like, oh shit, they're six.
There's still another to betold.

Speaker 1 (01:23:24):
I have to pee so bad I really do too.

Speaker 2 (01:23:26):
So let's keep this relatively brief at the end, and
we need another thunder punchdid you like it?
I did.
I really want to have another.
It was probably colder than thelast two.
It's so good.
It's good.
However, that fucker needed tostop going on boats.
He was the common denominator.

(01:23:46):
But it's quite wild.
I mean, he was through twoworld wars.
He was literally on the fuckingTitanic.
He saved people at Dunkirkirkyeah, do you want to watch that?

Speaker 1 (01:23:58):
yeah, I've never seen it I, I own it.

Speaker 2 (01:24:01):
I have still yet to actually watch it.

Speaker 1 (01:24:02):
I've never seen it.

Speaker 2 (01:24:03):
Uh, christopher nolan fucking love christopher nolan.
He is amazing, one of myfavorite directors ever.
Um, but I do have that, so weshould watch that.
Yeah, because I would love towatch that, but it's fucking
wild that he was two world warsand the fucking Titanic and
three other fucking ships orwhatever.

Speaker 1 (01:24:21):
Let's just go back out on the boat.

Speaker 2 (01:24:22):
Yeah, you know what?
I haven't sunk enough boats.
Time to sink another.
Let's do this, isn't?

Speaker 1 (01:24:28):
that crazy.

Speaker 2 (01:24:29):
And he and he raised the sail and he goes well.
I suppose, All right, buffoons.
That's it for today's episode.

Speaker 1 (01:24:36):
Buckle up, because we've got another historical
adventure waiting for you.
Next time Feeling hungry formore buffoonery, or maybe you
have a burning question or awild historical theory for us to
explore.

Speaker 2 (01:24:48):
Hit us up on social media.
We're History Buffoons Podcaston YouTube X, instagram and
Facebook.
You can also email us athistorybuffoonspodcast at
gmailcom.
We are Bradley and Kate.
Music by Corey Akers.

Speaker 1 (01:25:02):
Follow us wherever you get your podcasts and turn
those notifications on to stayin the loop.
Until next time, stay curiousand don't forget to rate and

(01:25:23):
review us.
Remember the buffoonery neverstops.

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