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October 15, 2025 10 mins

Abuse thrives on shame — but survivors are not to blame. If you’ve ever felt guilty for leaving, or ashamed for what happened, please know those feelings aren’t yours to carry.

They come from manipulation and control, not truth. Abusers want survivors to believe it was their fault, but it never was.

You did what you had to do to survive. That takes courage!

So what can you do to help? Start with self-compassion.

Say to yourself:

“I understand why I stayed.”

“I’m proud of myself for leaving.”

“I deserve peace.”

Each kind word to yourself helps release the shame they put there. Healing starts when shame and guilt is released.

Take a few minutes today to journal:

What would I say to comfort the version of me who stayed?

Remember you are worthy of love, safety, and freedom .

If you or someone you know is in an abusive situation and you need help message privately for national contact info for help. Stay safe! 

Someone out there needs to know they are not alone and that they can survive. Perhaps you are a parent or friend of someone trapped in an abusive relationship and need to know how to help. My goal is to share awareness, offer empowerment, and educate others about emotional traumas and domestic abuse. Here I will share my story and also stories of courage and healing from Survivors, Coaches, to Therapists/Counselors.


Find me here- ⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/melindajkunst⁠⁠


Find help and info here-

National Domestic Violence Hotline- ⁠⁠https://www.thehotline.org/⁠⁠

Safe Horizon- ⁠⁠https://www.safehorizon.org/⁠⁠

⁠⁠https://www.domesticshelters.org/⁠⁠

⁠⁠https://internationalwomenshouse.org/get-help⁠⁠

⁠⁠https://www.domesticshelters.org/.../national-global...⁠⁠

Sexual Assault Hotline- ⁠⁠https://www.rainn.org/⁠⁠

Abused Deaf Women's Advocacy Services (ADWAS) provides advocacy services for Deaf and DeafBlind survivors of domestic violence and sexual assault. ⁠⁠http://www.adwas.org/⁠⁠

Suicide prevention- ⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/⁠⁠

Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline: 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453)

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