June 18, 2025 • 26 mins
Thank you to Daniel Barton for sending in his true strange story of the unexplained. Remember: you can feel afraid and not be in danger.
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Produced by: Madame Strangeways
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Cover artwork by: Andrea Giselle Roldán at @cultofteddy
Every spooky story narrated in this podcast was read with permission from the original author. So dim the lights, get cozy, and let Madame Strangeways guide you through these true scary stories of the unexplained.
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Episode Transcript
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(00:01):
Do you have a true strange storyof the unexplained?
Submit it now on madamstrangeways.com or e-mail
madamstrangeways@gmail.com. I can't wait to read it.
Oh, I didn't hear you come in. Well, let's see.
(00:21):
What do we have here? I see some strangers, some
strangelings, some strange cetera, and who's that over
there in the back? Stranger Reno's Well, welcome
all of you to Madam Strangeways,where I, Madam Strangeways,
narrate your true strange stories of the unexplained.
(00:43):
And as always, solicited or not,usually not.
I share my strange thoughts and even stranger observations, and
I drag you down a slew of strange rabbit holes, kicking
and screaming if needs must. Today I've got one new true,
strange story for you. But first, a strange shout out
(01:06):
to my Patreon patrons TJ Hotter,G Man Music, Ted, Keith and
Tori. Thank you so much to my Feral
Fiendish Etcetera 5 for supporting the show.
If you want to hear your name inthe beginning of every episode
and turn the Feral Fiendish Etcetera 5 into some sort of
(01:27):
sinister 6 perhaps, well then, why don't you go ahead and join
the Patreon at madamstrangeways.com or
patreon.com/madam Strange Ways. And now on to our true strange
story here on Madam Strange Ways.
(02:10):
Some weirdness for your podcast by Daniel Barton.
I grew up in a house where therewas a lot of weirdness, usually
just glimpses of impossible things, like a figure walking
(02:31):
through the very much closed front room door.
It looked like my older brother,but was walking fast and staring
blankly ahead. It disappeared when I turned to
face it fully. I also saw a shadowed hand waved
to me on a glass window. Now I don't mean a reflection of
(02:53):
a hand in the glass, I mean a proper dark shadow on the glass.
The wardrobe in my bedroom was abuilt in one and my mother
always said she got an uneasy feeling when near it.
I once saw the same figure that looked like my brother run
across the landing to the top ofthe stairs and disappear.
(03:20):
The weirdest, however, is when Iwoke up to see Humpty Dumpty
standing in front of my wardrobe.
It was a humanoid figure with arms and legs, but its body and
head were the egg and it had a very cartoonish face.
(03:45):
It was wearing a suit and top hat.
My older brother then crawled into bed, scared because he
could see it too. Eventually he got out of the
bunk bed and turned the bedroom lights on and the figure
disappeared. When he turned it off, Humpty
(04:07):
returned but cut in half before disappearing completely.
I was walking home from school once and saw what may have been
a UFO. It was just hovering up above in
the sky. It never seemed to move and
(04:30):
stayed there for the whole walk home.
I was at Butland's holiday park and I was walking around.
I thought I saw somebody I recognized and touched her
shoulder to get her attention. She turned around and it wasn't
who I thought it was, but her eyes were entirely black.
(04:57):
I'd never heard of Black Eyed children before, and this was a
very long time before supernatural even started living
in a different house. I woke up once and saw my mother
standing at the opposite end of my room by the doorway.
She just stood there and stayed standing there unmoving.
(05:23):
It wasn't my mother, but it had the same kind of clothes she
wears and it also had no face. The face thing may have just
been because of me not having myglasses on.
I hid under my quilt until it disappeared or I fell asleep.
(05:47):
Another house I lived in, and this may be the most
definitively weird one, involvedthe upstairs bathroom.
Me and my younger brother shareda room where we were.
We could see across the landing directly to the bathroom door
which was mostly closed. There is literally no way
(06:10):
anybody could leave or enter thebathroom without us seeing it.
However, as we sat there, each playing video games on our
consoles, we heard the tap running in the bathroom, but the
light was off. Thinking this was weird, we both
(06:32):
looked at the bathroom for a fewseconds.
My younger brother called out toask who was in the bathroom, but
there was no response, save for the very distinctive squeak of
the tap being turned off. My brother then got up and went
(06:53):
and opened the bathroom door only to find nobody inside.
Daniel, thank you so much for submitting this horrifying
(07:17):
smorgasbord, smorgasbord, smorgasbord.
I think it's just smorgasbord anyway, the smorgasbord of
horror. Thank you very much for sending
this. I love that it that it hits on
everything. It hits on haunted houses.
It hits on UFOs. You got Black Eyed children.
You got no, that's, I think that's I think that's it.
(07:40):
Potentially A poltergeist. You've you've just got a little,
little sampler plate of everything and it's all just so
tasty, delicious. Thank you so much.
First of all, as always, I'm sorry that you had to experience
these things because I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm sure, I know they were
horrifying at the time. They're probably still kind of
(08:02):
scary now that you're thinking about them.
So I do appreciate that you tookthe time to type these out and
submit them. So thank you very much.
There's, there's so much to unpack here, but here's what
really here's here's what reallystood out to me.
There's a few things 1 I had a very similar experience to the
sync situation. So I kind of want to share that
(08:24):
with you because I was like, I've never heard anyone tell the
same kind of like bathroom storybefore.
So I'll share that in a second. But two things that also stood
out to me was firstly, the terrifying Humpty Dumpty ghost.
I will say when I was doing my research for this episode, I was
going to make this just a quick one, but there's so much here
(08:46):
that I, I'm going to try. I don't know.
Anyway, in my research, a lot ofpeople were saying that
illustrations of Humpty Dumpty scarred them as children and to
this day, kind of like permanently terrifies them.
The concept of Humpty Dumpty. So you're not alone in being
scared by Humpty Dumpty, but youmay be alone in that Humpty
(09:06):
Dumpty actually came into your room and terrified you as a
child. I don't know.
Hey, you know what, if you're listening to this, if you're
listening to this episode and you personally were victimized
by Humpty Dumpty, let me know. E-mail me
madamstrangeways@gmail.com. But the other thing that I
(09:28):
definitely wanted to talk about is seeing that girl with her
eyes entirely black, which is super, super spooky.
Now, this is actually where I was going to tell you my own
experience that sounded a lot like what you experienced with
your brother and the bathroom. In fact, I was like halfway
through reading my own experience or telling you my own
(09:51):
experience and then I realized, oh wait, I was going to do an
episode where I tell y'all my own personal experiences and
that's one of the experiences. So actually this is a spoiler
spoiler alert. One day you will hear my own
experiences, but that day is nottoday.
So sorry but a pin in that for afuture time.
(10:11):
Instead, I want to talk about Butlins Holiday Park, where Dan
experienced the woman with the entirely black eyes.
So first of all, Butlin's holiday Park.
I'm an American, the obviously, so I don't understand things
because that's what Americans do.
And so I definitely pictured like a Christmas park, a
(10:35):
Christmas thing. But then I realized, no, no, no.
If you're in the UK or probably Europe in general, when you say
holiday, you just mean like vacation or like time off, like
long weekend. So it's definitely not if it's
not like American holiday related, it's just it's a
vacation. We don't really have the
(10:56):
equivalent of a holiday park in America.
Here's what it says. A holiday camp is a type of
holiday accommodation, primarilyin the United Kingdom, that
encourages holiday makers to stay within the site boundary
and provides entertainment and facilities for them throughout
the stay. Bognor Regis, however, does not
sound particularly enticing. Doesn't sound like somewhere
(11:18):
that I want to go on a holiday. Actually, it kind of sounds like
it's got ROUSS. Rodents of Unusual Size.
That's a Princess Bride reference there for you.
That's what it sounds like to me.
Personally, I don't really want to go there.
Also, King George the 5th didn'treally want to go there either,
but because he was really sick for reasons I cannot remember
(11:42):
and I am trying really hard to not click back over to the tab
and check, but just know that King George the fifth was sick
and so he temporarily moved to Bognor.
When it was just called Bognor, he moved there temporarily to
convalesce in the sea air, whichis the thing people did back
then when they were sick. Or I guess it's not a thing that
(12:02):
people did. I think it's just a thing that
rich people did back then. So anyway, he moved there and
then after moving there, they renamed Bognor to Bognor Regis,
which is a thing that I didn't know happened until today.
So thank you for teaching me something.
Now I couldn't find any specificghosts or like urban legends or
(12:25):
anything spooky specific to Bognor Regis, and the only
deaths or anything weird that I could find that happened at the
actual Butlins Holiday Park in Bognor Regis.
The only deaths that I could find there were well after
Supernatural started, which was in 2005.
And isn't that suspicious that there's no deaths reported at a
(12:46):
holiday park prior to 2005? Interesting.
Billy Butlin, what are you hiding from us?
What are you hiding? But I did find some very spooky
ghost stories that are from southwest England and kind of
specifically in the Sussex area.Ish.
You know, I'm not from there, soplease forgive me if I'm not
talking about the areas of England like I should.
(13:10):
OK, Just give me a break. So one of them is called the
headless hitchhiker. Not to be confused with the
Headless Horseman. Very different.
So the headless hitchhiker, actually, though the story
doesn't involve a horse. Interesting.
The headless hitchhiker in Horsham, So it says.
If you live near Horsham, you will know the tale of the hermit
St. Leonard, after whom St.
(13:31):
Leonard's Forest was named. Obviously, duh.
But when I was younger my fatherwarned me not to ride my horse
across the forest. Who has a horse?
Oh boy, when I was younger my father warned me not to ride my
horse across the forest for another reason.
(13:51):
In the 19th century, there were a number of reports from riders
of being joined by an unexpectedand ghostly passenger riding
pillion behind him. Pillion means they're riding on
the saddle behind you, like behind you on the on the horse.
(14:12):
He's on the horse and he's headless and he's literally
riding right behind you. That's scary.
I don't like it, but it doesn't doesn't seem to match our MO of
of what Dan experienced. However, OK, here's OK, I'll
give you one more. Cuthbert of Flansham.
This is off to a great start in the 1930's, the Manor house and
(14:36):
Flansham. I think I'm saying that right
because it's spelled like Flan'sham, but I think it's Flancham.
I'm just going to move on. And the 1930's.
The Manor house in Flancham had quite a reputation for its
resident ghost, and many visitors reported meeting
Cuthbert. There was nothing sinister about
(14:57):
him, and he would apparently always vanish rather
apologetically. He was noted for wearing flannel
trousers. He would just be like, sorry,
oh, sorry. Bye.
And wearing flannel pants. OK, but of course in the UK,
when you say pants, you generally mean underwear and
trousers mean pants. So anyway, he had flannel
(15:22):
trouser pants. Interesting.
But before we leave Butland's holiday park in Bognor Regis, I
did find this little piece of trivia about the park Says
during World War 2, the holiday park at Bognor was a God of
hope. I'm saying Bognor, right?
Bognor. Oh, it might be Bognor.
(15:43):
That's not good because I don't want to redo this.
So pause. Let's check.
OK, Google, how do you pronounceBognor Regis?
That's pronounced Bognor Regis. Yeah.
OK, great. I've been saying it like
Trogdor. Bognor, you come on.
(16:04):
All right, You know what? I'm always learning this is this
is I'm leaving this and I'm not going to rerecord.
I'm not going to go back and edit it.
You're just seeing it live. I can make mistakes and then I
can learn from them. What a great lesson.
So Bogner, Bogner, Bogner, Bogner, man, come on.
During World War 2, the holiday park at Wagner was a cause for
(16:27):
concern for Butlin. The park had always had a
shooting range and during the late 1930's the targets were
replaced with images of Hitler, Goering, Goebbels and
Ribbentrop. After the Battle of Dunkirk,
Butlin became concerned that should the Germans invade the
South Coast, the first thing they might see was the gallery
(16:49):
making Butlin into a target. Which aside from the, you know,
the cowardice of thinking, uh oh, that might make me a target.
How badass is that? That's pretty badass.
So all right, I'll let him be a little bit concerned.
I don't know. It doesn't say that he took them
down. I kind of, I feel like, let's
get those back up. You know, I feel like those can
(17:11):
just go right back up. Maybe that's a 24/7 Evergreen
kind of thing that they need to do at the park.
I don't know. Do they even still have a
shooting range? Do you know?
Let me know, madamestrangeways@gmail.com.
So I couldn't find anything elsespooky about Butland's Holiday
Park or about Wagner. That's just not good.
(17:36):
I couldn't find anything else particularly spooky except the
famous author of some X-rated love letters that will surely
haunt you till your dying day. James Joyce, the novelist and
author of Ulysses, apparently worked on his book Finnegan's
Wake while staying in Bognor. Damn it.
(17:57):
Bogner. Bogner in 1923.
So this is even before it was called Bogner.
Am I saying that right? Yeah, this is even before it was
called Bogner Regis. It was just Bogner when James
Joyce was there. So fascinating.
Also, don't read those love letters.
If you haven't. Don't do it.
I did it and I don't recommend it.
(18:18):
Or maybe, maybe you're into it. I don't know.
I'm not going to yuck your Yum. Have fun.
OK, so Humpty Dumpty. Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall.
Everyone knows the rhyme. Apparently, many people have
been traumatized by the sight ofa Humpty Dumpty in an
illustration. Some people say Humpty Dumpty is
(18:39):
really referencing a Canon that was used in Colchester.
Now, I'm not sure that I'm pronouncing anything right.
Colchester. I think it's, I think I could
say Colchester in the siege of 1648.
Some people say Humpty Dumpty isreally a siege engine.
Siege engine used in the evil English Civil War in 1643.
(19:05):
Now, a siege engine is not an engine like we think.
It's not like Thomas. No, no, you should Google it
because I thought it was really interesting.
It's you. It's like made out of trees,
like wood, like I guess that's what trees are made-up.
And anyway, don't it's not an engine engine.
It's a, it's a, it's not a steamengine.
(19:26):
OK, anyway, just go look it up. It's interesting.
Or don't. It's fine.
Lots of sieges and wars in the 1600s in England.
Anyway, those theories, the Canon, the the siege engine,
don't really hold up. They don't hold water, they
don't hold up to scrutiny, even though they're pretty cool and I
like it. However, it is suggested that
(19:48):
Humpty Dumpty, if Humpty Dumpty,was actually anything other than
just a Riddle, and the answer tothat Riddle was that Humpty
Dumpty is an egg. Which is why he's always
depicted as an egg, because if you'll note, the rhyme doesn't
actually call him an egg or reference an egg in any way.
That's probably what it was. But if it's not that, if it's
not that, then Humpty Dumpty is purportedly King Richard the
(20:13):
Third of England, depicted as hunchbacked in Tudor histories
and particularly in Shakespeare's play, and who was
defeated despite his armies, allthe King's horses and all the
King's men at Bosworth Field in 1485.
So, you know, that's the origin of Humpty Dumpty.
I was kind of hoping for something a little more spooky.
(20:35):
I was hoping that maybe I could find some like esoteric or just
generally spooky thread and pullit, you know, and, and unravel
the mystery behind Humpty DumptyHaunting Dan.
Oh, Humpty Dumpty haunted a boy Humpty.
(20:55):
Humpty Dumpty finish that rhyme.If you finish that rhyme and you
come up with a new rhyme where Humpty Dumpty is, Humpty Dumpty
is terrorizing our boy. Dan sent it to me
madamestrangeways@gmail.com. Anyway, I couldn't find anything
else it was particularly scary other than like I've said,
Humpty Dumpty just scares kids. But as I'm researching Humpty
(21:17):
Dumpty, But what do my wanderingeyes should appear on the
Wikipedia page is none other than James Joyce.
He's back. What is he doing on my screen?
Why is he on the Wikipedia page for Humpty Dumpty?
(21:37):
Apparently. Apparently, James Joyce used the
story of Humpty Dumpty as a recurring motif in The Fall of
Man in the 1939 novel Finnegan'sWake, which, as you will recall,
he was writing in Bogner. Soon to be Bogner Regis.
(21:57):
What? So what?
Hold on Dan, is James Joyce haunting you like he was in
Bogner Regis well, Bogner, he was in Bogner.
He wrote about Humpty Dumpty. Those are two are you?
James Joyce is is this? Am I on to something here?
(22:20):
I feel like I'm on to something.All I'm saying is I've never
seen Dan and James Joyce in the same room together.
Did James Joyce maybe see his own spectral Humpty Dumpty?
And then that's why he was so inspired to write about him when
he's in Bogner? I leave you now with a dramatic
(22:47):
reading of an earlier and much scarier version of the Humpty
Dumpty rhyme. Humpty Dumpty lay in a beck with
all his sinews around his neck. 40 doctors and 40 rights.
(23:10):
Couldn't put Humpty Dumpty to rights this like Halloween like
stalk music in the background playing just imagine that was
there. What do you think?
Spooky haunted. Dan, thank you so much again for
sending me your story. I really appreciate it.
(23:31):
Now Dan is a listener who submitted his story and you,
yes, you listening you, unless you haven't experienced anything
spooky, in which case, wow, lucky.
But if you listening, have experienced something
unexplained, I do want to read about it.
So go ahead, send me an e-mail madamstrangeways@gmail.com or
you can hop on the website at madamstrangeways.com.
(24:04):
Thank you for joining me. For more true strange stories of
the unexplained, remember that you can feel afraid and not be
in danger. You're safe here with me,
probably. Please follow the podcast, leave
a rating on Spotify or Apple, ortell your friends and foes about
(24:25):
the show. It would mean the world to me.
The underworld, obviously. I mean, come on.
Madame Strangeways is produced and narrated by me.
Madame Strangeways thememusicisbymarina.ryan@marinamakes.co
Cover art is by Andrea Chiselle,rolled on at Cult of Teddy on
(24:47):
Instagram. You can submit your own true
strange story at madamstrangeways.com or send in
your thoughts or theories on stories on the show to
madamstrangeways@gmail.com. See you soon, she said
ominously. This these are the terms for
(25:28):
these are the names of Humpty Dumpty in German and
Pennsylvania Dutch. So apparently there's two
versions. Apparently there's two versions
in German. One is Viegela Vangela.
I don't know. Did I do it?
And this is the one that really got me is Humblekin Pumpukin.
(25:52):
Humblekin, pumpukin. Is it humble?
What does the umlaut do? That's a mystery for another
time. And then Pennsylvania Dutch.
It's Haberty Bob. There you go.
Do you have a true strange storyof the unexplained?
Submit it now on madamstrangeways.com or e-mail
madamstrangeways@gmail.com. I can't wait to read it.
Oh, I didn't hear you come in. Well, let's see.
(00:21):
What do we have here? I see some strangers, some
strangelings, some strange cetera, and who's that over
there in the back? Stranger Reno's Well, welcome
all of you to Madam Strangeways,where I, Madam Strangeways,
narrate your true strange stories of the unexplained.
(00:43):
And as always, solicited or not,usually not.
I share my strange thoughts and even stranger observations, and
I drag you down a slew of strange rabbit holes, kicking
and screaming if needs must. Today I've got one new true,
strange story for you. But first, a strange shout out
(01:06):
to my Patreon patrons TJ Hotter,G Man Music, Ted, Keith and
Tori. Thank you so much to my Feral
Fiendish Etcetera 5 for supporting the show.
If you want to hear your name inthe beginning of every episode
and turn the Feral Fiendish Etcetera 5 into some sort of
(01:27):
sinister 6 perhaps, well then, why don't you go ahead and join
the Patreon at madamstrangeways.com or
patreon.com/madam Strange Ways. And now on to our true strange
story here on Madam Strange Ways.
(02:10):
Some weirdness for your podcast by Daniel Barton.
I grew up in a house where therewas a lot of weirdness, usually
just glimpses of impossible things, like a figure walking
(02:31):
through the very much closed front room door.
It looked like my older brother,but was walking fast and staring
blankly ahead. It disappeared when I turned to
face it fully. I also saw a shadowed hand waved
to me on a glass window. Now I don't mean a reflection of
(02:53):
a hand in the glass, I mean a proper dark shadow on the glass.
The wardrobe in my bedroom was abuilt in one and my mother
always said she got an uneasy feeling when near it.
I once saw the same figure that looked like my brother run
across the landing to the top ofthe stairs and disappear.
(03:20):
The weirdest, however, is when Iwoke up to see Humpty Dumpty
standing in front of my wardrobe.
It was a humanoid figure with arms and legs, but its body and
head were the egg and it had a very cartoonish face.
(03:45):
It was wearing a suit and top hat.
My older brother then crawled into bed, scared because he
could see it too. Eventually he got out of the
bunk bed and turned the bedroom lights on and the figure
disappeared. When he turned it off, Humpty
(04:07):
returned but cut in half before disappearing completely.
I was walking home from school once and saw what may have been
a UFO. It was just hovering up above in
the sky. It never seemed to move and
(04:30):
stayed there for the whole walk home.
I was at Butland's holiday park and I was walking around.
I thought I saw somebody I recognized and touched her
shoulder to get her attention. She turned around and it wasn't
who I thought it was, but her eyes were entirely black.
(04:57):
I'd never heard of Black Eyed children before, and this was a
very long time before supernatural even started living
in a different house. I woke up once and saw my mother
standing at the opposite end of my room by the doorway.
She just stood there and stayed standing there unmoving.
(05:23):
It wasn't my mother, but it had the same kind of clothes she
wears and it also had no face. The face thing may have just
been because of me not having myglasses on.
I hid under my quilt until it disappeared or I fell asleep.
(05:47):
Another house I lived in, and this may be the most
definitively weird one, involvedthe upstairs bathroom.
Me and my younger brother shareda room where we were.
We could see across the landing directly to the bathroom door
which was mostly closed. There is literally no way
(06:10):
anybody could leave or enter thebathroom without us seeing it.
However, as we sat there, each playing video games on our
consoles, we heard the tap running in the bathroom, but the
light was off. Thinking this was weird, we both
(06:32):
looked at the bathroom for a fewseconds.
My younger brother called out toask who was in the bathroom, but
there was no response, save for the very distinctive squeak of
the tap being turned off. My brother then got up and went
(06:53):
and opened the bathroom door only to find nobody inside.
Daniel, thank you so much for submitting this horrifying
(07:17):
smorgasbord, smorgasbord, smorgasbord.
I think it's just smorgasbord anyway, the smorgasbord of
horror. Thank you very much for sending
this. I love that it that it hits on
everything. It hits on haunted houses.
It hits on UFOs. You got Black Eyed children.
You got no, that's, I think that's I think that's it.
(07:40):
Potentially A poltergeist. You've you've just got a little,
little sampler plate of everything and it's all just so
tasty, delicious. Thank you so much.
First of all, as always, I'm sorry that you had to experience
these things because I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm sure, I know they were
horrifying at the time. They're probably still kind of
(08:02):
scary now that you're thinking about them.
So I do appreciate that you tookthe time to type these out and
submit them. So thank you very much.
There's, there's so much to unpack here, but here's what
really here's here's what reallystood out to me.
There's a few things 1 I had a very similar experience to the
sync situation. So I kind of want to share that
(08:24):
with you because I was like, I've never heard anyone tell the
same kind of like bathroom storybefore.
So I'll share that in a second. But two things that also stood
out to me was firstly, the terrifying Humpty Dumpty ghost.
I will say when I was doing my research for this episode, I was
going to make this just a quick one, but there's so much here
(08:46):
that I, I'm going to try. I don't know.
Anyway, in my research, a lot ofpeople were saying that
illustrations of Humpty Dumpty scarred them as children and to
this day, kind of like permanently terrifies them.
The concept of Humpty Dumpty. So you're not alone in being
scared by Humpty Dumpty, but youmay be alone in that Humpty
(09:06):
Dumpty actually came into your room and terrified you as a
child. I don't know.
Hey, you know what, if you're listening to this, if you're
listening to this episode and you personally were victimized
by Humpty Dumpty, let me know. E-mail me
madamstrangeways@gmail.com. But the other thing that I
(09:28):
definitely wanted to talk about is seeing that girl with her
eyes entirely black, which is super, super spooky.
Now, this is actually where I was going to tell you my own
experience that sounded a lot like what you experienced with
your brother and the bathroom. In fact, I was like halfway
through reading my own experience or telling you my own
(09:51):
experience and then I realized, oh wait, I was going to do an
episode where I tell y'all my own personal experiences and
that's one of the experiences. So actually this is a spoiler
spoiler alert. One day you will hear my own
experiences, but that day is nottoday.
So sorry but a pin in that for afuture time.
(10:11):
Instead, I want to talk about Butlins Holiday Park, where Dan
experienced the woman with the entirely black eyes.
So first of all, Butlin's holiday Park.
I'm an American, the obviously, so I don't understand things
because that's what Americans do.
And so I definitely pictured like a Christmas park, a
(10:35):
Christmas thing. But then I realized, no, no, no.
If you're in the UK or probably Europe in general, when you say
holiday, you just mean like vacation or like time off, like
long weekend. So it's definitely not if it's
not like American holiday related, it's just it's a
vacation. We don't really have the
(10:56):
equivalent of a holiday park in America.
Here's what it says. A holiday camp is a type of
holiday accommodation, primarilyin the United Kingdom, that
encourages holiday makers to stay within the site boundary
and provides entertainment and facilities for them throughout
the stay. Bognor Regis, however, does not
sound particularly enticing. Doesn't sound like somewhere
(11:18):
that I want to go on a holiday. Actually, it kind of sounds like
it's got ROUSS. Rodents of Unusual Size.
That's a Princess Bride reference there for you.
That's what it sounds like to me.
Personally, I don't really want to go there.
Also, King George the 5th didn'treally want to go there either,
but because he was really sick for reasons I cannot remember
(11:42):
and I am trying really hard to not click back over to the tab
and check, but just know that King George the fifth was sick
and so he temporarily moved to Bognor.
When it was just called Bognor, he moved there temporarily to
convalesce in the sea air, whichis the thing people did back
then when they were sick. Or I guess it's not a thing that
(12:02):
people did. I think it's just a thing that
rich people did back then. So anyway, he moved there and
then after moving there, they renamed Bognor to Bognor Regis,
which is a thing that I didn't know happened until today.
So thank you for teaching me something.
Now I couldn't find any specificghosts or like urban legends or
(12:25):
anything spooky specific to Bognor Regis, and the only
deaths or anything weird that I could find that happened at the
actual Butlins Holiday Park in Bognor Regis.
The only deaths that I could find there were well after
Supernatural started, which was in 2005.
And isn't that suspicious that there's no deaths reported at a
(12:46):
holiday park prior to 2005? Interesting.
Billy Butlin, what are you hiding from us?
What are you hiding? But I did find some very spooky
ghost stories that are from southwest England and kind of
specifically in the Sussex area.Ish.
You know, I'm not from there, soplease forgive me if I'm not
talking about the areas of England like I should.
(13:10):
OK, Just give me a break. So one of them is called the
headless hitchhiker. Not to be confused with the
Headless Horseman. Very different.
So the headless hitchhiker, actually, though the story
doesn't involve a horse. Interesting.
The headless hitchhiker in Horsham, So it says.
If you live near Horsham, you will know the tale of the hermit
St. Leonard, after whom St.
(13:31):
Leonard's Forest was named. Obviously, duh.
But when I was younger my fatherwarned me not to ride my horse
across the forest. Who has a horse?
Oh boy, when I was younger my father warned me not to ride my
horse across the forest for another reason.
(13:51):
In the 19th century, there were a number of reports from riders
of being joined by an unexpectedand ghostly passenger riding
pillion behind him. Pillion means they're riding on
the saddle behind you, like behind you on the on the horse.
(14:12):
He's on the horse and he's headless and he's literally
riding right behind you. That's scary.
I don't like it, but it doesn't doesn't seem to match our MO of
of what Dan experienced. However, OK, here's OK, I'll
give you one more. Cuthbert of Flansham.
This is off to a great start in the 1930's, the Manor house and
(14:36):
Flansham. I think I'm saying that right
because it's spelled like Flan'sham, but I think it's Flancham.
I'm just going to move on. And the 1930's.
The Manor house in Flancham had quite a reputation for its
resident ghost, and many visitors reported meeting
Cuthbert. There was nothing sinister about
(14:57):
him, and he would apparently always vanish rather
apologetically. He was noted for wearing flannel
trousers. He would just be like, sorry,
oh, sorry. Bye.
And wearing flannel pants. OK, but of course in the UK,
when you say pants, you generally mean underwear and
trousers mean pants. So anyway, he had flannel
(15:22):
trouser pants. Interesting.
But before we leave Butland's holiday park in Bognor Regis, I
did find this little piece of trivia about the park Says
during World War 2, the holiday park at Bognor was a God of
hope. I'm saying Bognor, right?
Bognor. Oh, it might be Bognor.
(15:43):
That's not good because I don't want to redo this.
So pause. Let's check.
OK, Google, how do you pronounceBognor Regis?
That's pronounced Bognor Regis. Yeah.
OK, great. I've been saying it like
Trogdor. Bognor, you come on.
(16:04):
All right, You know what? I'm always learning this is this
is I'm leaving this and I'm not going to rerecord.
I'm not going to go back and edit it.
You're just seeing it live. I can make mistakes and then I
can learn from them. What a great lesson.
So Bogner, Bogner, Bogner, Bogner, man, come on.
During World War 2, the holiday park at Wagner was a cause for
(16:27):
concern for Butlin. The park had always had a
shooting range and during the late 1930's the targets were
replaced with images of Hitler, Goering, Goebbels and
Ribbentrop. After the Battle of Dunkirk,
Butlin became concerned that should the Germans invade the
South Coast, the first thing they might see was the gallery
(16:49):
making Butlin into a target. Which aside from the, you know,
the cowardice of thinking, uh oh, that might make me a target.
How badass is that? That's pretty badass.
So all right, I'll let him be a little bit concerned.
I don't know. It doesn't say that he took them
down. I kind of, I feel like, let's
get those back up. You know, I feel like those can
(17:11):
just go right back up. Maybe that's a 24/7 Evergreen
kind of thing that they need to do at the park.
I don't know. Do they even still have a
shooting range? Do you know?
Let me know, madamestrangeways@gmail.com.
So I couldn't find anything elsespooky about Butland's Holiday
Park or about Wagner. That's just not good.
(17:36):
I couldn't find anything else particularly spooky except the
famous author of some X-rated love letters that will surely
haunt you till your dying day. James Joyce, the novelist and
author of Ulysses, apparently worked on his book Finnegan's
Wake while staying in Bognor. Damn it.
(17:57):
Bogner. Bogner in 1923.
So this is even before it was called Bogner.
Am I saying that right? Yeah, this is even before it was
called Bogner Regis. It was just Bogner when James
Joyce was there. So fascinating.
Also, don't read those love letters.
If you haven't. Don't do it.
I did it and I don't recommend it.
(18:18):
Or maybe, maybe you're into it. I don't know.
I'm not going to yuck your Yum. Have fun.
OK, so Humpty Dumpty. Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall.
Everyone knows the rhyme. Apparently, many people have
been traumatized by the sight ofa Humpty Dumpty in an
illustration. Some people say Humpty Dumpty is
(18:39):
really referencing a Canon that was used in Colchester.
Now, I'm not sure that I'm pronouncing anything right.
Colchester. I think it's, I think I could
say Colchester in the siege of 1648.
Some people say Humpty Dumpty isreally a siege engine.
Siege engine used in the evil English Civil War in 1643.
(19:05):
Now, a siege engine is not an engine like we think.
It's not like Thomas. No, no, you should Google it
because I thought it was really interesting.
It's you. It's like made out of trees,
like wood, like I guess that's what trees are made-up.
And anyway, don't it's not an engine engine.
It's a, it's a, it's not a steamengine.
(19:26):
OK, anyway, just go look it up. It's interesting.
Or don't. It's fine.
Lots of sieges and wars in the 1600s in England.
Anyway, those theories, the Canon, the the siege engine,
don't really hold up. They don't hold water, they
don't hold up to scrutiny, even though they're pretty cool and I
like it. However, it is suggested that
(19:48):
Humpty Dumpty, if Humpty Dumpty,was actually anything other than
just a Riddle, and the answer tothat Riddle was that Humpty
Dumpty is an egg. Which is why he's always
depicted as an egg, because if you'll note, the rhyme doesn't
actually call him an egg or reference an egg in any way.
That's probably what it was. But if it's not that, if it's
not that, then Humpty Dumpty is purportedly King Richard the
(20:13):
Third of England, depicted as hunchbacked in Tudor histories
and particularly in Shakespeare's play, and who was
defeated despite his armies, allthe King's horses and all the
King's men at Bosworth Field in 1485.
So, you know, that's the origin of Humpty Dumpty.
I was kind of hoping for something a little more spooky.
(20:35):
I was hoping that maybe I could find some like esoteric or just
generally spooky thread and pullit, you know, and, and unravel
the mystery behind Humpty DumptyHaunting Dan.
Oh, Humpty Dumpty haunted a boy Humpty.
(20:55):
Humpty Dumpty finish that rhyme.If you finish that rhyme and you
come up with a new rhyme where Humpty Dumpty is, Humpty Dumpty
is terrorizing our boy. Dan sent it to me
madamestrangeways@gmail.com. Anyway, I couldn't find anything
else it was particularly scary other than like I've said,
Humpty Dumpty just scares kids. But as I'm researching Humpty
(21:17):
Dumpty, But what do my wanderingeyes should appear on the
Wikipedia page is none other than James Joyce.
He's back. What is he doing on my screen?
Why is he on the Wikipedia page for Humpty Dumpty?
(21:37):
Apparently. Apparently, James Joyce used the
story of Humpty Dumpty as a recurring motif in The Fall of
Man in the 1939 novel Finnegan'sWake, which, as you will recall,
he was writing in Bogner. Soon to be Bogner Regis.
(21:57):
What? So what?
Hold on Dan, is James Joyce haunting you like he was in
Bogner Regis well, Bogner, he was in Bogner.
He wrote about Humpty Dumpty. Those are two are you?
James Joyce is is this? Am I on to something here?
(22:20):
I feel like I'm on to something.All I'm saying is I've never
seen Dan and James Joyce in the same room together.
Did James Joyce maybe see his own spectral Humpty Dumpty?
And then that's why he was so inspired to write about him when
he's in Bogner? I leave you now with a dramatic
(22:47):
reading of an earlier and much scarier version of the Humpty
Dumpty rhyme. Humpty Dumpty lay in a beck with
all his sinews around his neck. 40 doctors and 40 rights.
(23:10):
Couldn't put Humpty Dumpty to rights this like Halloween like
stalk music in the background playing just imagine that was
there. What do you think?
Spooky haunted. Dan, thank you so much again for
sending me your story. I really appreciate it.
(23:31):
Now Dan is a listener who submitted his story and you,
yes, you listening you, unless you haven't experienced anything
spooky, in which case, wow, lucky.
But if you listening, have experienced something
unexplained, I do want to read about it.
So go ahead, send me an e-mail madamstrangeways@gmail.com or
you can hop on the website at madamstrangeways.com.
(24:04):
Thank you for joining me. For more true strange stories of
the unexplained, remember that you can feel afraid and not be
in danger. You're safe here with me,
probably. Please follow the podcast, leave
a rating on Spotify or Apple, ortell your friends and foes about
(24:25):
the show. It would mean the world to me.
The underworld, obviously. I mean, come on.
Madame Strangeways is produced and narrated by me.
Madame Strangeways thememusicisbymarina.ryan@marinamakes.co
Cover art is by Andrea Chiselle,rolled on at Cult of Teddy on
(24:47):
Instagram. You can submit your own true
strange story at madamstrangeways.com or send in
your thoughts or theories on stories on the show to
madamstrangeways@gmail.com. See you soon, she said
ominously. This these are the terms for
(25:28):
these are the names of Humpty Dumpty in German and
Pennsylvania Dutch. So apparently there's two
versions. Apparently there's two versions
in German. One is Viegela Vangela.
I don't know. Did I do it?
And this is the one that really got me is Humblekin Pumpukin.
(25:52):
Humblekin, pumpukin. Is it humble?
What does the umlaut do? That's a mystery for another
time. And then Pennsylvania Dutch.
It's Haberty Bob. There you go.
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