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June 9, 2024 36 mins

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Do you ever feel like developing charity for others is easier said than done? Join us for a heartfelt conversation with Kelly, a devoted mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother whose narrative takes us through the emotional terrain of growing up in difficult family circumstances and the trials of watching those she loves most choose to leave the gospel path. As Kelly embraces the trials of parenting adult children, she emphasizes the significance of unconditional love and maintaining one's own spiritual foundation in order to develop charity for others even when it certainly seems easier said than done. 

To conclude our conversation, Kelly highlights the transformative effects of temple worship and the small, consistent efforts that invite divine guidance into our lives and she shares touching stories of finding solace in the Lord's presence and the lifelong impact of nurturing faith in her family. This episode is an inspiring testament to the strength found in consciously choosing daily discipleship and the comforting embrace of divine love. Tune in and be inspired to reflect on your own faith journey and the extraordinary power of Jesus Christ in your life!

Please reach out to me if you are interested in sharing your story! I would LOVE to hear from you. :)

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Episode Transcript

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Lily (00:06):
Hello everyone and welcome to.
More Than Coincidence,remembering Jesus Christ in your
Story as the author andfinisher of our faith, our
Savior writes personalexperiences into each of our
lives which can later strengthen, empower and bring us peace
upon reflection.
This podcast is dedicated tosharing these anchoring memories

from everyone's unique storiesin order to collectively
remember and testify of thereality of Jesus Christ and his
presence in our lives.
I'm your host, lily, and I'mvery excited to share these
experiences together.
Welcome everybody.
Today we have Kelly.
Kelly, how are you doing Good?

Kelly (00:44):
thank you, will you introduce yourself a little bit.
Okay, my name is Kelly Chapman.
I actually grew up in BoulderCity, nevada.
I was born in California, thenwe moved to Nevada and I have
six siblings.
I have three brothers and threesisters.
My mom was married several times.

The children are all from thetwo husbands, but then she had a
few more after that.
And then I met my husband whenI was 17.
And I always joke that I gotmarried when I was 17 and a half
because that makes a difference.
It does make a difference.
You know, you're so much moremature when you're 17.

And I just I saw him at stateconference.
He spoke and he said thegospel's like a kiss.
You can't enjoy it unless youshare it with someone.
And I was sitting there going,yeah, can you share that with me
And then he came and introducedhimself to our.

He spoke at our seminary classbecause his aunt was my seminary
teacher and so he came as areturn missionary and spoke in
our class and then my aunt'sdaughter who came, became my
She said my, my cousin's gonnaask you out, and so she kind of
told me ahead of time.
So I knew that he came up to meto ask me out and I just kind

of made him stumble around withit because I knew what he was
trying to do.
So anyway, we dated for threemonths and got married in the.

Lily (02:16):

Kelly (02:16):
Angeles temple.
And when we were dating, hesaid to me and I felt the same
way we talked about how manykids we wanted.
And I said I want as many asHeavenly Father will send,
because I always wanted to be amother.
That was all I ever wanted, tobe Right.
And he said me too.
And so that's what we decided.

And I remember we had aboutfive kids and he's like that's
enough, right.

Lily (02:43):
So that's where my husband is right now.

Kelly (02:44):
He's like that's enough, right, he's like I go, yeah, but
what if we have a feeling,because I would have a feeling
that somebody was missing?
Yeah, I go.
But what if somebody's missing?
He goes, okay, yeah yeah soanyway we were.
We've been blessed with 13children, and now we have 45
grandchildren and one greatgrandchild.

Lily (03:02):
That's always a party with you guys, then that's right,
that is so much fun.
Well then, I'll just ask thequestion really fast what
memories do you have that youreflect on, that prick your
heart in remembrance of ourSavior Jesus Christ and anchor
you to him?

Kelly (03:19):
I have so many memories like that.
I think it started when I was alittle girl.
My mom divorced my dad and wemoved to Boulder City, nevada,
and her next husband was amember of the church and so she
was baptized by him.
And I remember going to churchwhen I was three years old and

sitting in the Sunday schoolclass looking at the picture of
the Savior on the wall and Ifelt like I was home, cool as a
little girl.
Yeah, and from that moment on Iknew that I had found right
where I was supposed to be.
Yeah, and even with all theproblems my mom had and
marriages failing and moving andeverything right, um, I would

I was always the one that wouldgo to church if nobody else
would go.
I would walk if I had to tochurch.
And so I feel like HeavenlyFather knew.
I knew Heavenly Father as alittle girl and it stayed with
And then when I, when the churchwas brought into my life, I
felt like I was up, yeah and soum.

Lily (04:30):
Through the years, as I've gone through many different
trials and challenges, he'salways been there for me yeah,
and you can look back on thosefeelings from when you were
young of just like thatconsistency.
He was literally your anchor hewas as you were going through
all of these crazy transitionswith moving and family
throughout your life.

Kelly (04:48):
And you're like at least I can go to primary every day,
yeah, or every Sunday at least Ican do these specific things
will always be the same, sothat's actually kind of cool,
yeah that is really cool and Iremember when my mom married the
second guy, all of a sudden Iwasn't calling my real dad dad
He became Jim dad, and thenCarol McCall, who was my second

He became I was supposed tocall him dad, and I'm four,
three, four, five years old andI remember feeling a little bit
confused and.
I well, I don't think I everreally resolved it until as I an
adult, right that that was hard, right.
In fact, I went to a type oftherapy where she has you
release things to a shape and acolor.

Oh interesting, it's veryinteresting and she had me talk
to my real dad Because I really,after my mom, divorced him.
We never really.
We saw him for once a week inthe summer, but I don't remember
him calling me every week,right, I don't remember him
calling me on my birthday.
I don't remember him calling us, yeah, on Christmas.

Lily (05:52):
I don't remember.
There's no involvement.

Kelly (05:54):
Yeah, yeah um, and I remember feeling like, looking
back on it, like I felt a littleabandoned I'm sure as a child
right, but then you just go onbecause you don't, because kids
are pretty resilient.

Lily (06:07):
I was gonna say kids are really resilient, you just go
with the flow.

Kelly (06:11):
And I had brothers that I was really close to and we were
really, yeah, good about youknow, sticking together.
Yeah, um, my older brother kindof went off on his own.
He was, he was hurt most by itbecause he was older when they
divorced yeah and he ended upgoing off and doing drugs and
having problems, right, right,but me and my two brothers.

And then she had three girlsafter that.
Um, we, my two, my two brothersthat had the same dad.

Lily (06:40):
We were pretty close, yeah , so that helped to have each
other and we still understandwhat was going on.

Kelly (06:45):
Yeah, that's cool, yeah and when I look at my family, of
the siblings, me and twosisters are active and then the
other three aren't and one, myoldest brother, passed away from
drug and alcohol.
So, um, but my mom, you knowshe, she struggled but she ended

in the end like she died lastyear at 93.
In the end she would say to mehow come I couldn't keep a

Lily (07:18):

Kelly (07:19):
I remember saying mom it's okay, heavenly Father's
gonna, you're gonna be okay youknow, yeah, she just I don't
know, she just had people thatweren't totally loyal to her and
it was just really hard.

Lily (07:30):
Well, and relationships are hard.

Kelly (07:32):
Marriage is rough.

Lily (07:33):
It is, it's not.
It's not for the faint of heart, no, and I can't even.
Yeah, and even when you have.
I feel like you know they talkabout the triangle all the time
in a marriage right, Like youand your spouse, and then Christ
I feel like even when you havethat, like you still are.
So I don't want to say shaky,but it doesn't like make hard
things go away.

Kelly (07:52):
No no.

Lily (07:54):
It makes things still hard , like things are still.
Absolutely so.

Kelly (07:57):
And you know back in like my dad wasn't faithful to her,
yeah, and then the next onewasn't yeah and um, back in that
time you didn't go tocounseling.
I think if she could havegotten counseling because my dad
, she told me later, like shetold me like 10 years ago your
dad didn't want me to leave.
You know, leave him.
I'm like right, why did youleave?

Lily (08:21):

Kelly (08:21):
Yeah, she goes well because, well, because I was
hurt, you know, she, just I getit, it's not right.
But, um, she, in the end, she,she worried a lot about being
So I I told her mom, you'refine, don't, don't worry about
it, you're okay.
She actually was anchored tothe savior because of all her

trials, you know.

Lily (08:44):
Right, well, you just have to hold on the hole in the next
Thankfully, Jesus takes care ofeverything.

Kelly (08:49):
That's right, yeah, and I have also seen like trials with
my kids.
You know, as you know, we'retalking about here your
daughter's challenge.
You know how old is she?

Lily (08:59):
She's six, six, yeah, going on 16.

Kelly (09:02):
I have a granddaughter like that.
But I'm looking at my kids now,who are using their agency as
adults, and a few of them arenot using it in a way that makes
me feel happy for them.
They're just making choicesthat don't reflect the way they
were raised, and so all I can doand we've talked about this in

our Relief Society many timesall I can do is love've talked
about this in our releasesociety many times right, all I
can do is love them right andlet them know that, like my one
daughter that um just told methat she decided not to go to
church anymore, I just told herthat I love her and I honor her
agency right, because that's allI can do for her, and I just
pray that and it's really.

And then somebody else I wastalking to said oh my, my best
friend in California, we raisedour kids together.
Oh, that's cool and we weretalking about it because she's
got the same thing I have goingon.
Yeah, she says president, I,irene, said that you can't focus
on them and what they're doing,that you're looking at the
wrong thing.

Lily (10:03):
You got to be looking at what you're doing right to get
yourself where you need to beand everything else is right,
gonna be okay just like what shesaid, easier said than done,
like when he, oh my gosh, wheniring shared that one talk this
past, when they, when they were,in idaho and there was the
crazy flood and his wife was upall night.
He's like don't worry,everything's gonna be okay with

the temple.
I was like what do you meaneverything?
Like I could totally feel hiswife's panic.
She's like how can you sleep?
So I feel like it's.
I love how we, we, we tellourselves it's going to be okay,
but it is literally still theconstant reminder of having to
tell yourself Right, but whenyou watch them doing what
they're doing?
You of having to tell yourself.

Kelly (10:43):
But when you watch them doing what they're doing or
making choices that you knowaren't going to bring them joy
or are going to affect mygrandchildren, it's hard, but
also I can't dwell on it becausethat's not going to be
productive, right?
So, I turned to the Savior.
I let him know hey, these wereyours before they were mine.
So, Heavenly Father, andthrough the Savior, it's a plan

of salvation and I feel likewe'll be surprised how he works
the plan of salvation in theirlives.

Lily (11:17):
I agree, I agree.
Well, and I think I've noticedin my life that when I because I
do have I do have a lot offriends too who've also left the
church and stuff, but we'restill really good friends- and.
I think that when we choose tostay rooted and anchored to the
savior, we still carry his light, hopefully, so that when other

people do need something or wantsomething like we can have that
inspiration to help them to bethat ministering angel and you
never know what's going tohappen.
Right, you really don't needsomething or want something like
we can have that inspiration tohelp them to be that
ministering angel and you neverknow what's going to happen.
Right, you really?

Kelly (11:48):
don't yeah, and I've had a lot of experiences with like.
I had a best, a really goodfriend.
She taught me violin for eightyears I took violin when my son
was taking violin, because Iwanted to know how hard it was.
Then I found out it was hardBecause when you you play the
piano, the notes are in tunewhen you play the violin, if
your fingers are in the rightplace.
But anyway, this great friendof mine, she, for eight years

she taught me violin and thenone day she sends me this text
and says Kelly, you've got towatch this, this video.
The church, the church, hassugar-coated church history.
For us it's not what we thought, right, you gotta and I.
And I thought to myself what isshe talking about?
so I opened it up, I started towatch it and it was a guy that's

saying I'm a member of thechurch, I used to do this and
this, so he was like a wolf insheep's clothing, as the way I
look at it.
Right, and I started to watchit and I felt very uncomfortable
and I thought I don't need towatch this and I said Kathy,
don't watch this turn it offright.
Read this talk, read the thisconference talk.
Go to the book of Mormon.
Do go to the sources that willbring you joy and peace and

right comfort and those thingsthat we don't understand.
Set it aside, put it.
Put it in a place where you can.
It's there, but you're notgoing to lose what you do know
Doubt your doubts before youdoubt your faith right right and
she said no, 35 years, I'vedone this, I'm done, you know

right well.
So she took off her garments,quit going to church and she had
a 12 year old son and he, thefirst Sunday, when she said
we're going out to eat, he goes.
Mom, we don't go out to eat onSunday and she goes oh, it's
okay, now you know just stufflike that yeah so I just I have
had experience, like you, withpeople that you love and I just

decided I love her, she's myfriend.
So I had moved away and I cameback to visit and I came to her
door and.
I actually did block her onFacebook because when I would
write things about oh, I'm soexcited about conference, she'd
say we don't need profits todayand stuff.
So I blocked her and so I cameto her door and she goes Kelly,

I never thought you'd talk to meagain.
I go, why You're my friend.
She goes.
Well, you blocked me onFacebook.
I go.
Well, kathy, facebook isn'treal life, okay.

Lily (14:09):
Yeah, I still love you.
I have a phone.

Kelly (14:14):
She goes.
Well, I probably deserved it.
I go, yeah, you did.

Lily (14:18):
And that's nice, that you could be friends and candid
about that.

Kelly (14:20):
Yeah, so anyway.
So I'm still friends with herand I don't feel bad because
she's not.

Lily (14:27):
so One thought that I was just thinking of, too, as you
were talking, is when I've hadstuff like that, cause I, I, I
have a lot of the friends whohave.
It's the church history stuff.
And you know I'm going to bestraight up and honest.
Polygamy makes me souncomfortable.
And that's something that Ipersonally can't even look at,
think about, because I just get.

I don't get sad, I get angry,yeah Well, cause we don't
understand it Right.
And so for me, that's somethingthat I've had to really just
sit like, exactly like you say,I've had to just put it not in a
box, but, I like how you say,on a shelf, where you can still.
You can still see it, you don't?
You shouldn't completely getrid of your concerns because

they are valid concerns and youshould seek to try and find
those answers.
But I think when we allow thesethings that are so rooted in
mortality, that are so rooted inthings that we just don't know
people didn't always keep thebest journal entries.
People always tell things fromtheir perspective.
People always people, because weare mortal.

People get slighted, even thebest people, can you know.
And and I think that when wereally the best people can you
know, and and I think that whenwe really truly focus on, okay,
what is the gospel of jesuschrist, what is our savior jesus
christ, the plan of salvation,and we see those things for what
they are and we allow ourselvesto root and anchor ourselves in
those, it doesn't mean that westill don't have questions and

obviously, again, I feel likethe overarching theme is it's
easier said than done for sure,but I feel like when you are
anchored and rooted in those,it's like okay.
I don't understand why it seemsso unfair to women in this but,
I, do know that God loves allhis children, and I do know that
this is what he hasspecifically given to women you

know and I think, when you focuson those things and you kind of
have to give up your pride alittle bit too, of having to
know everything, I'm a personthat has to know how things work
, why things work and all ofthat.
And if I don't have a plan thenI get freaked out and so not
knowing things is really scaryand I've had to just say

literally Jesus, take the wheel.

Kelly (16:35):
Like I take the wheel.

Lily (16:37):
I prioritize my relationship over you and my
covenants with you, over thisvery temporal, very mortal thing
that is so clouded inuncertainty from a mortal lens
that I can't comfortably make adecision, and my relationship
with you is so much moreimportant than that which, again

, it's easier said than done andthat's just how I have to see
it, but I know we all have tokind of work through our own
things, so that's why I think weneed to have grace with our
friends, with our family membersof, because sorting this out is
messy andit's vulnerable and it's very,
very emotionally charged.

And I think, like you have saidtoo, that when we just say that
we're going to love them, whenyou counter negativity with
positivity, then it allows thespirit and allows the light to
be here so that even if they arehaving these problems, they
know okay, well, maybe there isat least one safe place that I

can go to.
If they can't don't feelcomfortable going to the savior
or going to anybody else, atleast maybe you, through showing
that love and affection cangive them that peace yeah for
That was kind of long sorry.

Kelly (17:53):
I love that, though I love that you're so.
I think that the most importantthing that I learned from
there's a friend of mine thatgave a talk in women's
She just gave a talk about, youknow, when our children wander,
people that you love wander,and one thing that she said in
the talk that really struck mewas that it was no surprise to

heavenly father when theywandered, when they made these
choices, that he knew it wouldhappen.
He knows the end from thebeginning and he wasn't caught
off guard and he hasn't, and wehave to trust in that.
And, like you said, it's easiersaid than done, but God does
have them.
He knows them better than theyknow themselves yeah and things

are going to happen in theirlives and they're going to
remember that.
Because what is we're we'retold, if we will train up a
child in the way he should go,when he is old he will not
depart from it.
That doesn't mean that he won'twander a little bit, right, but
I feel like, and and ultimately, it's their agency that's in
play, right, right, so noteveryone's going to choose the

highest degree of glory,celestial kingdom, and to live
the life that is required to bethere, right, but that doesn't
mean that they won't be in akingdom of glory, yeah, and be
happy and be happy.

Lily (19:13):

Kelly (19:13):
And ultimately it's their choice.
We would never want to forcethem right to our way of
thinking, because that's notgod's way right and so it really
is easy to love them.
It takes the burden off me totry and save them.
Yes, heavenly father and jesuschrist, their plan saves them.

Lily (19:34):
Yeah, my plan was to get them a body I did that part and
then kept them alive untiladulthood and then to to love

Kelly (19:48):
And I know my kids I've said this before my kids would
be ticked off if I quit going tochurch.
The ones that maybe aren't even.
Yeah, they would be mad like nomom.
You, what?
What are you doing?
This is your thing.
Or you know, I work at thetemple.
Oh, I'm quitting my job becauseI don't believe anymore or
I couldn't, of course, I couldnever do that, because that's
not who I am right.

I always thought one day, maybeI should just not go to church
and see what happens.

Lily (20:13):
You know yeah, I could never do it.
Yeah, it's not very similar.
Literally this past Sunday Iwas like I don't want to.
I'm so angry and grumpy todayand I was like, oh fine, I guess
I'll go yeah but I feel likeyou just drag yourself there and
even if you're just there, it'sbetter than not yeah, even
though I just wanted to wanderthe hallways rather than be in

Relief Society.
Sorry it's, it's okay, I triedSome days are better than others
, right yeah?
And it's okay, you were there,I tried.

Kelly (20:42):
Yeah, and I remember when I was, you know, I would go to
Nine kids on the pew, I'm likeyou know what that's like.
Yeah I.
Why did I come?
I didn't get anything out ofanything but I remember being
out in the foyer and a sweetsister came to me and she says
Kelly, I just want you to knowyou're planting seeds.

You know you might not want tobe here and it's nap time and
you wish you could just takethem home and put them in their
bed, but you're teaching themthat this is where you are
supposed to be, and I reallyloved that because it gave me
confidence that, even though I'mnot getting anything out of it,
I'm doing the right thing forthem if nothing else and I like
how they say it's the planting,the seed, because then it goes

back to the agency Once you helpthem, you know, nourish it and
grow it, and then they candecide OK, here's your plant.
Yeah, what do you want to do?

Lily (21:32):
with your little plant.
That's right, I did my part,yeah.

Kelly (21:36):
And not that your part is ever over.
I will always be there for themCorrect, you know and Heavenly
Father wouldn't put us here andthink that we could do it, if I
mean he wouldn't put us here andgive us this opportunity if he
didn't think we could do itRight.
And we're not perfect and wemake mistakes, Right?
Sometimes I don't think theright things or say the right

things, but my heart is in theright place and I think that's
all we can do for ourselves.

Lily (22:05):
Right, well, and that's the thing that I love about the
So, another confession I hatedoing sessions because I always
fall asleep.
I really try not to but Ireally do and honestly, this
past week was really awful,really crazy, but I had the
feeling I needed to go to thetemple and do a session and
usually it's.
I go and do initiatory becauseI love initiatory, because not

only what they say is cool, butyou get to walk around.

Kelly (22:29):
So I feel like it keeps me awake.

Lily (22:31):
It's easier that way.
But yeah, I had a really strongfeeling.
I actually had to go do asession and it really did strike
me with each covenant that wemade and what that implies and
truly the broken heart and acontrite spirit and really
literally just giving your alland all of these things.

I sat there and I was kind ofblown away and I was like, oh,
maybe we can do this.
Like like maybe we can make itand it.
I don't know, it was just acomfort for me.
And like going back to my, mydaughter, I had cause.
I was praying, please, god.
Like I need to know how to helpher and and my answer really was
like Lily, you need to justteach her, show her the good and

the bad.
And agency Like that'sliterally, was my answer Like
you're just your job is supposedto love her, point her to the
savior, show her what is rightand wrong, and then help guide
her when it comes to her agency.
And just sometimes you have tolet her make decisions and there
will be consequences to thosedecisions, but as long as you

are always redirecting them andyour children or your friends or
whoever back to the savior,yeah, then I think that that is
where you know.

Kelly (23:48):
that's where it needs well, and if you're directing
them back to the savior.
Ultimately, your prayer is thatwhen things go down and they
will, because we all have those-times that they'll remember.
My mom taught me that when I'mfeeling like this, I need to say
a prayer, or I need to open myscriptures, or I need to go to

the temple.
I think that you're setting anexample when you do that.
You know right and.
I made a goal when I lived inCalifornia.
Um, one of the templepresidents of the San Diego
temple came to a weddingreception that we had in our
backyard and he talked about youknow, what you have to do is

you have to decide when you'regoing to go to the temple on a
regular basis and do it.
And so, as I stood there, thespirit told me you need to do
that because I had so many kids.
There was always yeah.
So, I made a goal to go to thefive 30 session at the San Diego
temple every Tuesday morningand I did it for eight years

until we moved up here yeah andit changed me yeah.
I connected to the Savior andHeavenly Father and my covenants
in a way that I hadn't before,because I was consistent, right
and I've done that.
I've gone, I've done anordinance every week, almost

every week, since then.
When I moved back up here, Idid the the same thing.
I just kept it going.
And when I got my job at thetemple, I work at the Jordan
The question they asked me whenthey were hiring me is so if
you're going to work at thetemple Tuesday through Saturday,
eight hours a day, what aboutyour own temple worship?
And I thought that was awonderful question to ask, and

so I made a commitment to everyweek do an ordinance.
Yeah, sometimes two, but forsure one, Whether it's sealings,
initiatory endowment I haven'tdone baptisms.

Lily (25:50):
Baptisms are a little tricky sometimes.

Kelly (25:51):
Yeah, I have my kids do those yeah.

Lily (25:54):
My grandkids.

Kelly (25:55):
But I feel like it's made a difference and it's helped me
in my work, because I know thatand I also served as an
ordinance worker for about fiveyears and so and I've seen that
side of it, and then now I'mworking in the office, right,
but then my personal worship.
And I just have a testimony ofthe temple that it is the house

of the Lord and that's the onlyplace on earth where you can
feel well, besides our chapelsand our homes, Right when you
can feel peace and get answers.

Lily (26:27):
Yeah, and I'm really glad that you bring that up, Cause I
for a really long time like Iliked the temple, but I feel
like everyone was always saying,oh, I love the temple so much.
It's so amazing.
I get all this revelation whenI go there and and for me that
just wasn't me Like I would goand I would either fall asleep
or I would just not feelanything.

I feel like I tend to get myrevelation doing the dishes or
going on a hike.
But I feel like, because therehas been such an emphasis on
going to the temple andremembering your covenants and
really getting in tune with thespirit, I have really been
trying to go a little bit moreand it's been like once a month.

Kelly (27:09):
Yeah, that's okay, but your season is once a month.
I was once a month.
Yeah, that's okay, but it'ssomething your season is once a

Lily (27:14):
I was once a month, forever, right.
And I feel like, as I have beenconsciously doing that, I have
not necessarily noticed like ohmy gosh, all this revelation
pouring in, and oh my gosh everytime I go.
It's such a good experience,but I do feel just so much, I
just feel it's kind of weird,it's like grounded, like my soul
just feels more stable and lesskind of like oh, this is

happening, oh, that's how.
And I still feel anxious and Istill feel worried.
But I feel it's like this weirdfeeling just inside me.
I feel Like it's going to beokay and I've told myself, you
know, this summer, now that mykids are all home from school, I
want to try and take them andwe're just going to walk around
the temple once a week.
And I think that you can countthat as a mom.

And you really, and even just asa parent, as a person like I
think, as long as it literallysays in the initiatory and
literally says in the endowmentthat if you are just trying to
do these things as best you can,then you're good, that's right
And I'm a person where I don'tbelieve in participation awards,

so sometimes this kind of makesme a little like irked.
I'm like what do you mean?
Everybody's going to get thesame stuff, even though we're
But then I sit and I'm likeokay, wait, that's my pride.
And but, lily, you need that,like that's literally you, you
need that grace you need, youneed that participation award,
that gold star, lily, becausemortality is is hard.

Kelly (28:45):
I think what you said is true.
I, I, you are not alone in when, every time you go to the
temple, you don't always haverevelation, right?
Not, I don't think everyonedoes.
I think most people'sexperience is just like yours.
But when times are hard and yeah, and you do have something that
you're going to go to thetemple to ponder and to work on,

like your daughter that you'reworried about, right those are
the times when I do feel likethe revelation comes and you did
receive that right because youcame seeking that right, and I
just think it's based on ourpersonal humility and
preparation right what we getout of it, and sometimes it will
I fall asleep too, especiallywhen I do the.
Tuesday morning 5 30 session.

But Heavenly Father knows whatwe need and he knows what, yeah,
and he knows that you aren'talways going to have that and
he's so glad you're there, evenif nothing happens.

Lily (29:38):
And you go away after a good nap, you know.

Kelly (29:41):
He still was so grateful.
You went and you come out armedwith power and, like you said,
you get revelation and doingdishes or on a hike.
But you wouldn't have as muchof that if you didn't go to the
temple, because you're armedwith power when you go to the
temple Right, and those times inthe temple prepare you for the
times when you're praying forhelp outside the temple Agreed.

Lily (30:04):
Yeah, that's oh, and I think kind of tying it even just
back into the theme of of thepodcast it's you know, as we are
doing these things, everylittle experience that we have
is a tiny little thread thatbinds you to Christ and anchors
you to him.
So, whether that's you know youbeing little and just looking

at the picture of Christ andbeing like, oh, that's familiar,
or I don't know the birth ofyour child, or just like a
beautiful sunset, like all ofthese things where the spirit
really does whisper to you andtouches your heart.
those things testify of acreator those things testify of
god and I think, when weconsciously are remembering

those and reflecting back onthose and trying to trying to
take the advice of, of our youknow, of our leaders and saying
you know what they're saying weneed to go to the temple more.
I'm going to try and go to thetemple more, whatever that looks
like, right, right, or justinviting the lord into my life
consciously, whatever that lookslike.
I think that's a w, I thinkthat's a win and I think that

you when you do that.

Kelly (31:11):
He wants to be there and you're slowly tethering yourself
to him right, yeah, does itremind you of that?
talk at conference about umpillars and and rays and rays
yes I think that we need toremember the experiences we have
that are there are rays because, you know right, those
consistently happen in our lifeand as we acknowledge the Lord's

hand in our life, we're goingto be able to bind ourselves
even more to him, because weknow, hey, he's got my back
Right, exactly yeah.
And like my husband passed awayfive years ago, it'll be June
18th, it'll be five years.
And then my son passed awaythree years ago, august 23rd,
And when I think about thosetwo trials, at the time when

you're going through it, youdon't believe it's going to
happen Like when my husband wasdying, I, I was pretty much in
I went to work the day that hedied.
Oh yeah, and I, and, and thenmy sons called me and said, hey,
mom, you need to come homeCause yeah, he's not, he's not
doing good.
But why did I go to work?
I could have stayed home.
I knew he wasn't doing well,but I think I just was in denial

And then my son he kept beingso optimistic about his cancer
and that it was going to getbetter.
And he said I'm going to write abook after this about my
And I remember sitting by himwhen I went to visit him,
probably six weeks before hepassed and he goes.
It's weird to read what peoplesay about you on Facebook before

you've died, because his wifehad posted he's not gonna make
it yeah and so people arewriting things about him and
he's reading them and and I'mlike oh my gosh, that would be.
That would be really weird yeah,he just that's what he said to
He goes mom, this is so weird,you know, but I saw Heavenly
Father's hand in both of thosesituations and.

I knew that it was their time,right and and as hard as it is
to let them go you know thatthey're okay and that you're
going to see them again.
And that's the greatest piecethat I have is that.
And I'll talk to Gary.
Sometimes I'm like why, why didyou go first?
I wanted to be the one to gofirst and our things will happen

And I'll just talk to him whenI'm driving, or I'll you know,
I'll pray to heavenly father,tell him I love him, let him
know that I you know he'slistening, yeah father tell him
I love him.
Let him know that I you know,you know he's listening.
Yeah, so I.
I have been so blessed in somany respects since he died um.
Like this house that I'm livingin.
You know the rent is affordablefor me and I.

I got that job nine monthsbefore he died, yeah, and I have
, am able to provide for myselfright in a place where I feel
peace all the time, yeah, well,not all the time, but most of
the time, yeah, sometimes wehave angry patrons, but I do
have a testimony of that, thatthese things that happen in our
lives, these trials, these hardtimes that we go through, right,

we're never alone and and thelord will provide what we need.

Lily (34:11):
He's taken such good care of me and now I have I have the
13 children I was going to sayyou have an army behind you.

Kelly (34:17):
Yes, and 45 grandchildren and one great grandchild, so I
am never alone.
But I have a testimony thatwe're okay if we put our trust
in him.

Lily (34:28):
Well, are there any other finalthoughts or memories that you
would like to share, or wouldyou like to just bear us a quick

Kelly (34:37):
I wanted to end with elder gong's talk um, I remember
the name of it the last talk hegave, but the last.
At the end of his talk, this iswhat he said and I think it's
it very powerful and it goeswith your theme of your podcast.
In time and eternity, thepurpose of creation and the

nature of God himself are tobring all things together for
our good.
This is the Lord's eternalpurpose, it is his eternal
perspective, it is his eternalpromise.
Is his eternal promise whenlife is cluttered and purpose
isn't clear, when you want tolive better but don't know how?
Please come to God, our Father.
In Jesus Christ, trust theylive, love you and want all

things for your good.
I testify they do infinitelyand eternally in the sacred name
of and holy name of JesusChrist.

Lily (35:31):
Amen, that's Wow.
I feel like that wrapseverything up pretty good.

Kelly (35:35):
That's powerful, huh?
Yeah yeah, because our livesare, like you said, they're
messy, and so when we feel thatconfusion or clutter and things
aren't clear, come unto theSavior and Heavenly Father and
they want all things for ourgood.

Lily (35:52):
They'll, they'll make it all work together for our good,
right, or even if you're blowingaround in the storm, it's
better to be like holding on tosomething while you're like
flapping in the wind, just likefree floating, and it sometimes
feels like that doesn't it yeahyes, I know, but in the end
peace comes, yeah, andespecially when we're living our

lives according to the will ofGod, right I?

Kelly (36:17):
think it's harder to feel peace when we're being contrary
to that Right.

Lily (36:22):
Well, Kelly, I reallyappreciate you chatting with me
Thank you so much for spendingthis time and yeah, thanks again
for tuning in to More ThanCoincidence, remembering Jesus
Christ in your Story.
Please follow us on socialmedia or share us with a friend.
If you have an experience you'dlike to share, feel free to

reach out tomorethancoincidencerememberhim
at gmailcom.
I can't wait to hear all of theamazing memories you all have
of our Savior.
See you next time.
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