Sister Wives S5 E6 - Confronting Failure

With the wives living separately for over a year, the family structure is falling apart. After stressing over finances, the wives try hard to start a web business, and Christine makes another attempt to pass her real estate exam.

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Sister Wives is a TLC docuseries starring Kody Brown, Meri Brown, Christine Brown, Janelle Brown, Robyn Brown, and their family.

Episode Transcript

(00:10):
What does the nanny do? OK, so we're done.
Goodbye. You shut it off.
Do not twist my words. Do not.
Make me a victim, sweetie. Just look at the mountain.
That's what you saw that day. Just the knife in the kidneys
over all these years and the sacrifices that I made to love

(00:32):
you. Oh my goodness, I need to see a
chiropractor. I've got whiplash after this

(00:52):
episode. Whiplash.
It was so fast. Very fast.
It's a Shorty so it was only 1/2 hour episode, but there was a
lot of things that happened and it went really quickly.
It was very fast a. Lot of talking one-on-one
interviews where there were important things said that felt

(01:14):
necessary to record with our handwriting, our cursive, your.
Calligraphy Pen. Yes, we had to pause and make
sure that our L's were just so.
And apologies in advance. We have a little bit of delay
with our recording because I wassick and before I was sick,

(01:37):
Kimber was sick. And so if you hear extra
wheezing, coughing in the background and sniffles,
apologies. Apologies all around.
I have taken Dayquil so maybe I'm even a little more dumb than
usual, so that might be something.
Well, at least you're not on your deathbed anymore.

(01:58):
Very sad you are missing me or missing the sister wives and.
Oh yeah. Definitely had to come find you.
On your.
Deathbed. I missed Christine so much and
then they gave me a whole bunch of Christine in this episode so
that was God's way of making me laugh.
Season 5 episode 6 confronting failure.

(02:22):
Gotta love an episode with failure in the title.
Ominous. And I will point out now that
they started the episode with ominous music, and I don't think
they've really done that before.
Yeah, I'm not so sure, but it was.
But I've noted. Oh, things are not going well,

(02:42):
No. No, no, no.
And we opened at Christine's house once again, A lot of
Christine. A lot of Christine.
In this episode, she tells us that she got a 73% on her
practice exam for her real estate license.
Was this the one before or afterher first failure?
After I believe she took a classOK so she failed she decided to

(03:07):
take a class and then they gavea practice exam in the class and
she got a 73 needed out of 75 to pass and she is says it's
disgusting I got a 73. Disgusting.
Well, they also gave us a flashback to her yelling in the

(03:28):
restaurant about her initial failure, which is always great
to revisit. I failed.
I failed. So that's some fun sepia toned
footage, Christine says. They tell you that you need
uninterrupted and dedicated timefor studying for this and she
talks about having a 2 year old and how she's being constantly

(03:50):
interrupted. She's holding Truly in her arms
and she says perhaps This is why I failed.
I think Truly is 3 OK. And she's like, I probably
haven't gotten more than 15 minutes of non interrupted study
time a day. OK.
As a single mom, you know that'll happen.
Yeah, as a single mom who is married and has three sister

(04:13):
wives, but she's definitely a single mom right now.
I hear a lot about that in this episode, and I'm not mad about
it. I'm here for the honesty.
Sweet, sweet honesty. We've been missing you.
Christine says failing would just be another failure, which,
you know, OK, so we're going tobe talking a lot about I'm

(04:34):
taking off my, I'm taking off mysweatshirt right now.
He still has a fever, mind you. He's sitting here, he's taking
off his sweatshirt, getting hot and bothered about this possible
failure again. The sweats and the chills.
The sweats and the chills. He has a lot of experience with
failure and he's getting workedup about.
It Oh my gosh, this is it I'm it's like I'm reliving all of my

(04:57):
own personal failures through this episode Oh God, for maybe
for once I'll be identifying with Christine.
She says that passing is a personal goal of hers.
And you know, I really like her,she states the obvious.
The way she says this, it's a personal goal.
Something personally that I would do, something I personally

(05:19):
achieved. Yeah, I don't know.
Christine does have a way with words.
Yep, Yep, Yep. Semantics.
Saying the same thing over and over again with different words
like I just did there. Maybe this will be the first
failure episode for my Sister Wives podcast.
Perhaps. Luckily that intro was short

(05:40):
lived and the family, all of theBrowns gather and go to the
cul-de-sac to see the status of their dream homes.
And there's a crew there breaking ground and getting
things started for their homes. There's machinery digging up
dirt. I don't know what that's called.
The thing with the.
An excavator. Excavator.

(06:03):
See you. Later.
Oh, yeah. Excavating the ground.
Absolutely. So, you know, they're digging up
dirt, getting, you know, Christine's like that's where my
home is going to be. You're breaking my ground first.
And they had to take the kids to show them that it's real, it's
happening. It's actually happening.

(06:24):
OK. Yeah.
Little proof. Proof for your pudding, finally.
This pudding needs some proof. Give them some morsel of hope.
Again, We're not just to hoping, We're seeing it now.
See here. What did that?
What was that, Robyn? Like?
You mean you're giving us a second chance at hoping?
Yeah, Yep, here it is coming to fruition, ladies and gents.

(06:48):
And Robyn gives us another precious Pearl.
It feels like a long time since I've had a real home.
This is it. I hope it is Robyn with the
quotes again. And if there's anyone that I'd
like to see homeless, it's Robyn.
So it's a little like, cool, thanks for letting us know
you're going to have a home, Robyn.

(07:09):
If there's anyone who's been homeless before on this show,
it's Robyn, right? Well, has she?
I don't know if she's really been homeless.
I mean, she lived with her mom for a while I suppose.
That's not not what one would consider homeless.
But there is a photo of Dayton sitting in front of a space
heater in a trailer. So I don't know what that means
to. Her that's homeless.

(07:29):
Yeah, to her, that's homeless. Meri's face is literally orange
and 1000 times darker than the rest of her body.
Her neck, her neck, and her chest are exposed.
Her long sleeves are just covering the arms.
They are not covering the chest at this time and the chest is

(07:51):
whiter than my ass. Oh God no, it wasn't that bad.
It was really bad. Oh geez, it was bad.
Her face has been a distraction.
We did cover it in our last episode quite a bit about Meri's
face. I think she took my advice.
I think she stopped tanning the entire body.
Oh, and saved a little money anddecided to just tan from the

(08:14):
chin up. So she should be rocking some
turtlenecks or something. She should be doing something to
yeah, the ombre of her body. It was like she did give up the
spray tans finally and then just decided to use the same
makeup that she was using when she was getting the full body
spray tan. Oh, sure.

(08:35):
It was problematic as always. Kody rehashes the move to Vegas.
You know, we have to get some clips from back in the day,
telling the kids about the move, telling them about the homes,
blah, blah, blah, setting us up for this theme of confronting
failure and maybe just not even confronting it, just failure,
failure. So he's got to remind us of

(08:58):
their previous failures, which we've all seen and discussed.
Kody says this is significant. The kids and wives need a sense
of security. I love his use of the word
significant. I was like, oh Kody, it's a big
word for you. Well, he doesn't know what being
a significant other is, but he apparently knows what
significant means in the sense of trying to lie to your

(09:19):
children and give him a sense of security.
Again, like what the fuck man? Yes, Kody and his significant
lies. Yes, absolutely.
There is a moment where we get the older kids on a couch, a
couch moment, and they say they think it'll be more like Lehigh
for the families to be next to each other again.
And that's something that we've heard in previous episodes kind

(09:39):
of this whole things were better than and, you know, hopefully
these younger kids get this experience.
So, you know, the older kids are echoing that.
Probably prompted by a producer.
Whatever. Yeah, kind of the first time
that the older kids have said the younger kids need what we
had in Lehigh. And Maddie says that she can't
wait to actually have a space tocall her own and to paint the

(10:02):
walls, to actually be able to paint and like claim a space.
And I understand that. Well, yeah.
And in this episode, there were moments where I noticed broken
blinds, you know, framing from around a door missing.
Like, there's just, they're in these rentals where things
probably aren't kept up all thatgreat.
But then when you've got the Browns living there, you could

(10:24):
move into a perfectly fine space.
And by the end of a year, year and a half, however long they've
been there, at this point, it's probably like demolished,
like it looks like there's like 17 cats and they've all
destroyed everything. But it's just the Brown family.
Well, Mckelty wouldn't have to
hang paper on her walls to decorate.
She'll actually be able to paint the walls.

(10:45):
Can you imagine how splendid that will look?
It'll be a creative outlet for her.
Oh. My.
Gosh, and we do get to hear more about Mckelty's creativity
coming up. So on the couch with the
teenagers, Mckelty has fresh, freshly dyed red hair.
Oh yes, bright red. Very red.
Not so fresh that it's on her skin, around her face or

(11:07):
anything like that, but it is fresh.
Yes, and it is red. Like when you think I'm going to
the supermarket and I'm going to buy a box of red hair dye.
That's the color, and I've had that color before too.
And I just have to say, I make fun of everyone so fucking much
for their hair in this TV show, whether it's the Browns or the

(11:29):
guests or whoever. And I I'm right there with.
That. If you look at me at this time
period, I literally like, AM these people, which is why I
don't feel so horrible tearing into them for it, 'cause like I
could pull up the proof and be like, yeah, I can make fun of
myself for the same fucking thing.

(11:49):
So I feel bad about it sometimes.
And then I'm like, Nah, girlfriend, you're basically
making fun of yourself. Same.
I've had the black hair, the red hair, the blonde hair, the
blue hair. I've had it all.
And so I agree when I'm making fun of MC Kelly, these red hair,
when I had red hair, it really accentuated the pimples on my
face because it was, I was a teenager and it was like the

(12:10):
acne was like ha ha, ha because of the red hair.
Oh. Goodness, it's.
Quite a look while they're at the cul-de-sac, there's a moment
where they all are going to cheers to this momentous moment,
to this significant moment in their lives, and they show
pouring some sort of red substance.

(12:31):
Cranberry juice? I'm guessing Unless you have a
UTI or you're mixing it with vodka, you're probably not
drinking straight cranberry juice, Yeah.
It's been years since I've had straight cranberry juice, but it
did get my mind. I was going to say racing, but
that's not true. It did get my mind moving at a
snail's pace and I was like, this would be so funny if

(12:52):
instead of it being cranberry juice, if it was actually wine
and they all got fucked up, they're all wasted on a
cul-de-sac. I'd be like, oh, that'd be
great, but it didn't happen unfortunately.
Another failure. Outtakes after the end of the
episode, just them stumbling their way back to their four
separate homes all the way from the cul-de-sac.

(13:12):
From like half a glass of wine.
Berb. But they don't come out and say
during the show. We do know, based on Christine's
book, that she was having a cider every now and then after.
They're going to be.
So they're drinking, but they're not talking about.
It Yep, Yep, Yep, Yep. We go to Christine Dean's house
again. Next, we're talking to Mckelty.
Your favorite person? Love.

(13:34):
Mckelty love Mckelty. Oh, and we're back to this dream
of being a world class fashion designer.
Oh yes, I actually, you know what?
I'm going to blame my current illness on Mckelty because in
the last episode we were saying her name like Mckelty and I

(13:56):
strained myself and I never fully recovered.
So Mckelty, you have hurt me personally.
You're just such an Angel, you're not used to using the
demon voice. I just want it stated for the
record that Mckelty is personally liable for my
illness. OK, Thank you, Mckelty.
Christine says you want to hone in on a teenager's dream.
You want to encourage them, especially if their dream is to

(14:18):
become a world class fashion designer.
And you look like Mckelty. So that's what we call a big
dream. So we call a really big dream.
Yeah, they're going to be going downtown to meet Jennifer
Henry, the fashion designer extraordinaire.

(14:40):
Absolutely. Christine, Kody and Mckelty are
going to meet this Jennifer Henry and see some behind the
scenes action of what it really means to be a world class
fashion designer. Now, honey, I want to ask you,
how many Jennifer Henry pieces do you currently own?
I think that I wrapped some chicken in a piece of cellophane

(15:04):
yesterday, so maybe 1, Christine says.
They're going to see the nuts and bolts of it all, and then we
get there and they are putting the model in a cellophane dress,
yes. No, I for those of you who are
like me and are going well, what the hell is cellophane?

(15:26):
Is it like plastic wrap that you?
Wrap, plastic wrap type of thing.
And it totally looked like it. It looked like it was trash bags
that had been melted down into one big long thing and then
compiled into a dress, but different colors.
Yeah, it's like thicker than Saran wrap, but kind of similar

(15:47):
and it was neat looking. The dress was not hit like.
If I just saw it. I would have been like, oh,
that's interesting. Like I wouldn't have said it was
terrible or anything. It took some sort of artistic
mind to make it, and it took a designer to make it.
You couldn't just whip that stuff up on your own unless it
was maybe Barbie scale and then I'd be able to whip it up on my

(16:10):
own. Oh, but honey, you're an artist
as well. I am, yes.
You know my miniatures are gorgeous.
Oh God, you're miniatures. Mckelty has perhaps the craziest
curls I have ever seen in my life with this fresh red hair.

(16:30):
I don't even know how to describe them.
You said before sausage curls. Sausage curls, but these ones
were different, I wrote down. I've heard banana curls.
Mckelty curled her hair to the nines.
Oh yeah, to the 9.9999 nines. It was intense.
It was another hairstyle that I definitely had myself before.

(16:51):
It was way intense. It was intense and she's trying
to be cute. She's going to meet a fashion
designer. She thinks this is a big deal.
If we're being frank, She got taken it looked like to me to a
salon to have I just some photos taken of this cellophane

(17:11):
dress. This lady was trying to promote
her designs and probably got the connection through the show
and make healthy thinks. This is a really big deal and
it's probably just for a local magazine, and I'm not knocking
that like it's still a big deal,but they're trying to play it
off that it's bigger than it actually is, Right?

(17:34):
Yes. Yeah.
To. Tee up the setting.
It looks like they're gathering in like a hallway slash back
office. Like the basement of a college
to begin with. Yeah, like something I don't
know. Then they get to a salon.
At some point, they're showing, like, footage from what looked
like inside of a salon. So I don't know.

(17:55):
But I think they start out dressing her and then they do
cuts to perhaps the area where they had done her makeup before.
It was just bizarre.
And it looked like a college student doing her final, and she
had to go and take photographs of her final dress she made.
And they said, yeah, sure, kid, tag along.

(18:18):
That was the vibes. Yeah, that was the vibes.
The dress. The cellophane dress.
It was a dress of many colors, kind of like Joseph in the
Technicolor dreamcoat or something, but it was a
cellophane dress. It was a plastic prom dress.
It was a plastic. It totally was, and it wasn't
even one or two colors. It was multiple colors.

(18:38):
Yeah, Each layer of the skirt, if you can imagine, was like
Rick racked with cellophane, like draped with different
colors of cellophane. And the model comes out to get
her little ass into this dress, and she's wearing a short white
petticoat, which I don't know what that was going to do under

(19:00):
the cellophane. Like that would lift that heavy
of plastic. Nah.
And then she's wearing a black bra and she comes out to step
into the dress and get help and what what occurs?
They're going to get the models, makeup done and all of that,
and then they're going to be getting into a car and driving

(19:20):
to a location to photograph. The dress.
So the way that we're being introduced to this is like once
again in this setting of where the fuck are we?
And then she's undressing to get put into the cellophane dress,
which sounds it look just as it just, I don't even know how you

(19:41):
try to do this. So there was multiple people
trying to get her in this. And she's going to drive off in
a limousine to location for photos.
So apparently a limo is bigger.
How are you supposed to sit in this fucking thing without
smashing it to shit and making it look like trash?
Why wouldn't you get in this on set?
Like on set. Yeah, at the location it's a

(20:02):
little weird little. They don't show her in the dress
and I just had an epiphany that they had her come out in
her bra and underwear just for this scene to get a reaction.
That makes sense. There's no fucking way they put
her in that dress there and then put her in a car and then
took her to location. They never even show us her in
the dress. Smashed half the dress sitting
in the car. Yeah, these fakers.

(20:25):
These these fucking fakers. If you can't believe the
producers of Sister Wives, who Can you believe?
This is a significant farce, Kody.
To use your own words, Significant.
Kody's such a significant farce.You bastard.
Oh God, so this is you're right because they're.
Sorry, no, just had that realization.

(20:46):
You're right, because they tee up this whole thing of Kody
talking about how he has to leave the space because the
model is getting undressed. And Oh my God, we get to hear
more brilliant takes from Robyn because of course we need Robyn,
who's not even there to tell us about what's going on.
So they're on the couch, and then Robyn starts to fill us in

(21:07):
on this. Christine first says Kody left
because he's a gentleman. Oh yeah.
And then we go to the couch and we get even more gems from Robyn
in our religious beliefs. It's a sin that you should see
another woman naked. Kody chooses in his personality
to be a gentleman, to be the kind of guy who would turn his

(21:31):
eyes when someone disrobes in front of him.
Disrobes, disrobes. Disrobes.
I'm like where does she get these random more than one
syllable words and like why is she using them?
She's so crazy. This is something that's been
either like Straight said to her, or she's read somewhere and

(21:51):
she's regurgitating it. Yeah, no, she disrobes is not
part of her regular vernacular. No, she literally had to puke
those words out of somewhere other than her own gut because
Jesus H Christ. Oh honey, don't take the Lords
name in vain. This is a pure podcast.
Says the man who said fuck in front of my 3 year old tonight.

(22:12):
And my child proceeded to walk
around saying it for like 5 minutes straight.
Fuck. And I'm like, Oh my gosh, I'm
just going to look at everything but your kid.
I'm like, Nah, don't worry about it.
Yeah. Luckily, it wasn't long lived.
I've said worse. It was a little like, oh, of all
the things I just said, you picked up that.
It's because it's Uncle Chris saying it, not Mommy.

(22:33):
Because I say it probably too often and he just thinks you're
so cool he wants to repeat it when you say it.
Oh honey, you're so flattering.
Leave it to the Funko. The phone uncle.
Yeah, or the Gunko. The gay uncle?
Yeah. And the Funko could also be the
faggot uncle. Oh, it works.
I like either one. Kody tells us that his kids pick

(22:58):
on him for his modesty expectations.
It's like we know Kody. We know.
They tased me for my modesty beliefs.
Yeah, well, the way he says it is so dumb too.
Like. And they say it right after each
other. Robyn and Kody, these modest
beliefs disRobyng. DisRobyng.
And then he's such a gentleman. Like, does someone really think

(23:18):
Kody Brown is a gentleman? OK.
Kody also tells us that the model is being taken to Lake Las
Vegas, which is such a far distance, so they can't go to
the shoot. They just simply couldn't, which
totally aligns with the fact that this isn't even happening.
She's not going to go sit in a
limo in that dress. That'd be like me.

(23:39):
I can't even think of anything because it's so asinine.
It's silly. They're obviously teeing this up
for a reaction from the family and to get a scene of Kody being
modest. The family Christine confirms
with us that Mckelty did like the experience she did.

(24:00):
And I was like, duh. But also now that I'm thinking
it was all set up, I guess even if he she didn't know then it
would be fine. I mean, she did seem to be
enjoying herself. She's paying attention.
She was engaged. So I guess, you know, that's
probably a lot from a Kelty. Yeah, I'm sure she didn't know
that they set her dad up for some of the scenes and her mom
up for some of the scenes, but she knew that it had to be a

(24:25):
setup to get her there. I don't know, like, in what
world your mom would be like a normal mom would be like, OK, my
daughter wants to be a fashion designer.
I'm going to go and call around and I'm going to see if
anyone's doing some sort of fashion things.
Or there was like, an associate producer of the show that's
like, we've got to set something up for some storyline.
And it's like, OK, Jennifer Henry, if we're wrong.

(24:47):
And there is a photograph of this beautiful young woman, this
model, in this lovely cellophane dress out near Lake Las Vegas
with a limo in the background. Send it to us.
I'd love to see the footage. I'd love to see the shots.
It took talent to make the dress.
Not saying it didn't take talent to make the dress.

(25:09):
True. I mean, I would fail at it.
So you know, she succeeded at that.
I would not fail at it if it was Barbie scale.
Just putting it out there. Got to give Kimber her wins.
We cut to Christine's house, presumably on another day.
She's talking at the camera. We get so much, Christine.
I'm sorry, you guys, we get. This whole episode is her.

(25:30):
She says that she got 71% on her second test exam after her
initial failure, which is another failure.
So she has failed her second test exam after failing her
initial exam. I just want to say a lot of
failures when it comes to what Christine's doing for no reason,
just because. You know, they're asking her for

(25:50):
specifics, like what was the score?
And she's apologizing to her children for not helping while
she's studying. Yeah, I've been studying a lot,
she says. She gives us an example of how
Isabel asked her when she got home from school how she did at
her practice test. And Christine says I failed at

(26:11):
my quiz. And Isabel says, well, this just
means you'll be studying again and continuing to ignore me.
And Christine says nobody wants to fail.
It means you have to study more.
Again, Like, yeah, yes it does. No.
One wants to fail after studying, but the point of being

(26:31):
good at anything is that you never stop studying, right?
Like, if you're good at something and you enjoy doing
something, you never really truly stop studying it.
And so the fact that this is such like, homework for you and
hard for you just goes to show me that this probably isn't for
you. Not that people don't have to
study and be like, naturally good at everything they do, but

(26:54):
there's just something about this that feels like she thinks
she needs to prove herself to people other than herself.
And maybe she's not full like, heart in this.
It's just weird. I'm glad you brought that up
because I was questioning myselfgoing, You know, Chris, other
than your innate hatred towards Christine, why is it that you

(27:14):
are struggling so much with hearing her talk about this?
I was going to start with bitch,why are you so fucking dumb?
I, I mean, honestly, if you are studying so much and you
continue to fail at practice tests and the actual test and
your kids are saying you're always studying and you're
making it seem like it's the endof the world, it's like maybe

(27:35):
this just isn't for you. I defaulted to Christine's a
moron, but I might have been wrong.
Maybe it's just not a good alignment because like you said,
you don't come out of the wombas an expert at anything but
stuff that you're passionate about the learning process and
the growing process isn't something that you're like
fighting against 100%. There might be times of

(27:57):
frustration where you're like, why can't I get this?
Or like, oh, I'm disappointed inmyself.
But there's there's something about it that makes you want to
keep trying and gives you like a passion and she doesn't have
it, clearly. She doesn't have it, and the
only reason that she keeps on going is because she feels that
she needs to do this for the family for monetary reasons,

(28:19):
basically, yeah. She tells us that later.
If you're not even good at this to begin with, then how are you
going to make money doing it? I don't know.
The whole thing is just not adding up and it makes me feel
bad for her because I think she's doing this and thinking
it'll get her maybe some positive attention or some

(28:39):
feedback from the family and shethinks since she put her mind to
it, she's got to stick with it.
It reminds me of like a child that decides they want to
practice the cello and it's maybe their 6th grade year and
you get to choose between all these instruments.
You pick the cello and you're dead set on the cello and you

(28:59):
hate it and you're not being honest with yourself or your
parents because you said you'd do the It's just a very weird
situation and it feels childlike, like a lot of her
stuff does to me, feels very childlike.
Yeah, like you pick the instrument in 6th grade and then
by 8th grade you're like, I fucking hate this.
And you're in band going. Or maybe if she's an orchestra,

(29:20):
she's looking at another person playing an instrument going,
oh, I wish I was playing that. And when you're a kid so many
times, I mean, at least my parents would have been like,
well, this is what you're doing and you chose it and whatever.
And it's like, that's terrible.
Like give them a chance to change if they want.
Yeah, I think that there's a happy medium between giving
stuff a fair shot and getting past the hump of I'm just not

(29:40):
good at this to the point where you're like, no, I'm really not
into this. My mom was obsessed with the
idea of me learning the piano and I hated it.
I took piano lessons from the time I was six years old until I
was 17, and I sucked at it because I didn't give a fuck.

(30:02):
I asked my mom repeatedly if I could play the guitar and I was
like, all I want is to play theguitar.
And she's like, if you practice piano more, I'll get you guitar
lessons. That never happened and I
fucking hated the piano. And my mom has told me in my
adult life now, I wished that I had done the piano when I was
younger. And I'm not going to lie,

(30:24):
there's a big part of me now that wishes I would have taken
that more seriously. And that was a huge monetary
commitment on my parents behalf when they didn't have the money
for it and I took it for granted.
But I wish that they would have just let me quit and do what I
wanted. And I'm getting this vibe from
Christine where she's never really had the chance to pursue

(30:45):
her own dreams. She doesn't really know what she
wants. She's been given these ideas and
this is what Janelle wanted. So she hopped on the bandwagon
and Janelle passed. And now she feels like she has
to continue with it instead of pursuing her own dream that
she's unsure of. It's it's kind of sad to me.

(31:07):
And This is why I actually like Christine a lot, because I just
think there's this true innocence and naivete about her
and I just want to see her succeed so bad.
I don't know. Also with the Janelle choosing
this and she's paralleling and now she has to continue on, I'm

(31:27):
assuming was an initial push from Kody of pressure for the
monetary things, right. Like, you have to, we have to
make money, we have to make money, we have to make money.
And it's like it sucks when we all have that.
Well, most of us have that in life where we have to do things
that we don't aren't passionateabout, we don't care about just
to make ends meet or to pay forthings.
And that pressure sucks. I feel like that's a pretty

(31:52):
universal experience. Very universal.
I know it's like a little bit ofa tangent, but I hope that
people can relate to it because I think from a young age, we
feel this pressure to succeed inthings that we don't really care
about, but we start to care about because we're trying to
impress other people. And it's unfortunate.
And if there's one lesson that Ihope to teach my kids from a

(32:15):
young age is that do things thatyou're passionate about.
Don't do them because you think it's going to make, you know, me
or your dad happy or someone else in your life happy.
Like do what makes you truly happy.
And these women have never been given that chance.
And here she is still trying to do something for this family
that's falling apart. And she even says, like, we

(32:36):
moved the family with all these promises, all these promises of
staying together, and that's not happening.
And I just need another success.And when she says I need another
success, I guess my little, you know, charcoal heart became
a little bit bigger or something like that.

(32:58):
And I was like, yeah, God, she needs another success.
Her heart's in the right place doing all of this, but it's not
in the right place for her. And I think that is something
that I learned through her book is she's, you know, now in a
place in her life where she's doing things for herself.
So that makes me happy to know that she's at a place like that

(33:19):
finally. But it's sad to see her striving
so hard for something she obviously isn't passionate
about. But then she's taking her child
to do something that she's passionate about.
So it's like, yeah, there is this huge juxtaposition between
her taking her child to pursue her dreams and then her trying
to pursue someone else's dreams.Oh, the tragedy of it all.

(33:43):
Oh gosh, it's Christina. Tragedy.
When she was wrapping up this segment, she was talking about,
you know, needing the other success, but how the kids hate
being in four different houses and how her relationships with
the sister wives are dwindling. So there's like this thing
happening with her personally while she's also dealing with

(34:04):
recognizing that the family is falling apart.
And while it's been peppered in throughout the show, at this
point, the last couple episodes,we've been hearing this.
And this is the thing about thisshow that's so weird.
It's like they say these things,we know these things, these are
real things, blah, blah, blah. But then it's like, bump it up,
bump, bump on to the next scene.

(34:26):
And it's like you just said, your family is falling apart,
your relationships are dwindling with your sister wives, and
that your kids hate their lives right now because of their
living situation. And then we're about to get
whiplash. And then, Yep, now we're going
to get whiplash and go to Robyn's house.
It's like, oh God, And then we're going to be launching my
sister last class. Thank you.

(34:54):
I couldn't go for that high note, you know, it would have
killed me. We're at Robyn's house,
everybody. Yeah, unfortunately.
And the web designer is coming over to help them launch the
website for my sister wife's closet.
We've all been just eager with anticipation for an update on
this. Now we do get a couple updates
including the actual launch of the website and then some shots

(35:17):
of the jewelry which we will get to.
Janelle tells us that my sister wife's closet was a fraction of
the cost of the gym. You know, she's reminding us of
this journey they went on, but that the gym is still a dream of
hers. Which, you know, we know she
didn't get her dream. Just like Christine's not
getting her dream. There's a lot of dreams not
happening here except for Robyn's dream.

(35:38):
Imagine that Robyn gets her dream come true.
Because it had a low start up cost, Christopher.
And her, her drawings, her doodles were just so
inspirational. The web designer's over, they're
sitting around a table, there's a landing page, and then they
launch the site and they show, you know, over the shoulder
footage of the I. It's so funny because I have a

(36:00):
bit of PTSD about the, like, footage of the Google Analytics
live tracking and like the way it used to be laid out on the
page and how there was the number of live visitors.
And it's like 228-220-9232 and there's almost 300 people on the
site, which, you know, we were, you know, kind of chuckling at

(36:22):
because it's like they're kind of making it sound like there's
like thousands of people knocking at the door.
And it's like the footage they had was Max 300 at one time.
Yeah, I want to say it didn't get over 300, but.
At certain points, 300 people are listening to this podcast at
one time and you only see me dancing in the streets.
I'm not like filming it, you know?

(36:42):
I mean, you ask other people to film it, but.
Dancing in the street. And of course, Robyn, you know,
she's so smart. All these people are there and
it's like, we're just standing there naked.
And I'm like, why are you saying it's like you're standing
there naked? Like oh God, her correlations
are just idiotic. Meri is like a whole bunch of

(37:05):
people are looking, but nobody's buying anything.
There's no purchases. Yet yeah, no ones buying
anything. We do get a little footage of
Meri on her phone, Christine on her phone.
It's like everyone's on their devices now at the time.
Of course there's no mobile responsive website like I'm sure
because they all live. They're like keyboard flip

(37:25):
phone, like the, you know, phones that move up and down.
They've got them sideways. Like they're probably looking at
the desktop version of a website and trying to, like, figure
out what's going on. And Meri's on her phone.
And as you said, no one's buying anything.
No, and Kody has to remind us this would be devastating
financially. It would be an emotional set
back is one thing, but a financial set back is another.

(37:49):
And Meri's on her phone and she says people are saying they'd
like to buy something without mortgaging their home.
So I'm imagining that she's on the tweeter.
You know, she's on social media somewhere getting some live
feedback from people who are visiting the site and going, I
can't afford this shit. One of them is what about real
moms wanting to buy without mortgaging your house?

(38:12):
And they kind of laugh and chuckle at it.
And it's like, this is fucking hilarious because you guys can't
afford your own home. And like, now you're getting
this comment about your jewelry being expensive.
And then, Oh my God, Kody. Kody's comments says.
In my head, I wanted our pieces to be somewhat iconic.

(38:34):
Oh, iconic. All right, Madonna.
Do you think you are Madonna? You dumb bitch.
Like no no no, there's no iconic when you're in your 5th season
of a TLC reality show and you're a polygamist family.
And wait till you see this trash.
Oh God, they show examples of the jewelry and they are

(38:55):
hideous. And Robyn says they are not
cheap. They are sterling silver.
That's the thing, That's the thing.
They're sterling silver, that's the thing.
And it's like, what are you trying to say?
They. Sell sterling silver in gas
stations. You're dumb.
Oh. God, I'm like, I feel like you
can buy. I, I, I, I don't know, but I

(39:16):
think when I was in 10th grade, I bought my girlfriend a
sterling silver ring from Kmart for like $15 and gave it to her
and was like, you know, whatever.
And I was like, is it real silver?
And the person behind the counter working at Kmart was
like, yes. Sterling darling, Sterling.
It was definitely a lot nicer than this my sister wife's

(39:37):
closet crap. Yeah, my high school boyfriend
brought me a sterling silver with turquoise pendant at one
point. No chain this is.
So funny, but we're talking about high school experiences.
These are fucking grown ass adults with children and all the
things. Well they show us like this 5 LB

(39:58):
charm of an S and AW that literally looks like a drawing
ripped out of my 9th grade notebook.
Yeah, it reminded me of like a cartoon, like someone took.
It was a cartoon. From cartoons and made an
southwest out of it and then with.
Sharp edges for I don't know. To hurt yourself, but worry.

(40:23):
Yourself after you spend all this money on their jewelry and
regret it like. And the charm thing, the charm
was like it reminded me of when someone has like a jumbo key
chain and it has the big ass circle and there was like all
these charms, it looked like it weighed 25 lbs.
I'm like where would what would you even do with this?
In the original sketches, when we were looking at the sketches

(40:46):
and you're like, well, let's give her some slack.
Like I'm sure it's not going to look like the yeah yeah bitch I
was. Having a fever?
Dream like I'm sure it's not going to look exactly like and
but we both said we were like who the fuck wants an southwest
right on a necklace? Unless you're like initials are
southwest, what the fuck. Very strange.

(41:10):
The only reason you would want that piece of jewelry
specifically is if Southwest was in some way super significant
to you. And who's that?
We learned that they did 28 orders on that first day. 28
orders. 28 orders. While this is going on, I did a
couple things caught my eye other than Robyn's fabulously

(41:30):
designed jewelry. 1 is that Meri is wearing a long sleeve shirt
that is nuclear green. And I think when I said, Oh my
God, the shirt's nuclear green, you said another thing.
Chartreuse. Chartreuse, Yes.
It was like a muted version of Brat Summer from a year or two
ago, whatever that was. Yeah.
My hair color from our brat summer.

(41:53):
Oh God. Oh I forgot about that.
Must have been a trauma response.
God. And so she's wearing this like
hideous long sleeve shirt that like no one should be, well, she
is white, pretending to maybe not be white.
So it might have maybe worked, you know, with the face.
She probably thought it made her look even more tan.
She's like, it really brings up to Tanner and it's like, oh,

(42:16):
honey, no, no, no, no, no. And with over that nuclear green
shirt was this black spaghetti top and it just was awful.
And in front of her was stemware with orange juice in it.
And there was in front of Kody the same thing.
And I'm going, we're drinking orange juice out of stemware at
our website launch while wearing nuclear green and selling the

(42:39):
ugliest jewelry you've ever seen.
Like what is this? I don't understand a lot of the
choices. Yeah.
And This is why I don't believe that there's not any drinking
going on. Like do you think who would do?
This over. Well, also, but like, do you
think they were like, well, let's make little mimosas for

(42:59):
ourselves while we do this? And like, perhaps they were
having actual mimosas and they justify it by being like, well,
we're just having like, basically a little fancy soda
here or something. Like, it didn't look bubbly at
all. But I also don't know.
It just seems so bizarre. Janelle says, you know, we've

(43:22):
got big homes for this business and I didn't understand what
the fuck that was supposed to mean.
I think she means like, we've got like a lot of money sunk
into this and now we've got these big homes to pay for with
this business. But she goes.
We've got big homes for this business.
Oh God, I missed that. And why did they even pull that

(43:43):
as a sound bite? It's so dumb.
Puddle Monkey. They're just terrible. 28 orders
on the launch day, which to me, I'm going, you know, it's a
launch day with obvious promotion because Meri's like on
her phone, everyone's like checking to see what's going on.
They've obviously been plugging
this and promoting this. They launch and a launch day
where you have multiple people that are on a television show

(44:05):
Hawking their fucking nasty ass jewelry should be a peak, not a
valley like the first day should be a like, wow, we're going to
have to have this as a goal to reach again.
Like somehow we're going to get there.
And it was 28 orders. That should be the most sales.
Like, oh God, I'm not kidding you when I say this jewelry was

(44:25):
ugly as sin. Like it's ugly and it's the
dumbest thing and whoever hyped her up about the Southwest and
the whole sister wife's thing as the sayings on stuff.
Like we said before, how many fucking people are sister wives
in the real world and how many people who actually are sister

(44:48):
wives can afford this shit? Right.
Yeah, people with two incomes and without a million children
can't afford it, let alone someone who's like, stealing
government benefits and has like, a horde of groceries in
their basement. Strange.
Unbelievable, completely unbelievable that they even
thought that this was, I don't even like remotely a good idea.

(45:09):
This is like the dumbest thing ever.
I don't know. We get to Christines house yet
again for the 400 thousandth time this episode.
This is Christine episode. And she is leaving for the real
estate exam. She is walking out of that
house, head held high, going to take the real estate exam.

(45:32):
Oh yes. The rest of the family is
patiently, quietly waiting at a park for the results of set
exam. Well, when Christine's leaving,
there is a funny clip with like Kody saying goodbye to her.
She's walking out the house and he says, I don't remember
everything he said, but one of the things he says is like, have
a good day or something. And it was like totally a thing

(45:55):
you say to fuck. It was so mindless.
Like I'm like, dude, are you even aware of what she's doing
and where she's going? He's probably thinking about
either Robyn or how he might have to be somewhat responsible
for his own children while Christine is doing this, and
probably not even all of them. Or it was filmed after the fact
and it was it was just filmed as a plug in for any situation

(46:16):
similar or like thereof. Totally could be a pickup.
Interesting. Because it was really bizarre.
And if it was a situation where she was actually leaving to do
the exam, it'd be like give her a hug, a kiss on the cheek and
say good luck, you've got this.
Got this girl? Yeah.
You're strong. You're a Kelly Clarkson song.
You've got this. It's David.

(46:36):
Christine so tall a lie. Oh God.
OK. Oh, jeez, yeah.
Christine gives us some voice overs, then while we're watching
her leave and then into some couch moments where she talks
about how they've isolated as a family.
They've isolated, isolated. It feels like we've failed even
if it's not permanent. And I'm like, even if it's not

(46:59):
permanent. OK, so you're temporarily
failing. Once again.
On the theme of failing, she says it feels like we're living
separate lives and we don't need each other anymore.
Yeah, it's kind of sad. She's like, I wanted to have
these ladies to help raise my kids.
I'm doing it alone. And gosh, I feel like I'm

(47:20):
failing at that. She's failing at being a single
mom. Well, when you didn't plan on
it, it's. And you pop six of them out of
that. Hoo ha.
Then you got to raise them by yourself when your husband's
with another wife and no one's checking in on you.
And we were just talking about this with Meri last episode.
You said, why isn't Meri checking in on people?

(47:41):
Meri's nowhere to be seen, nowhere to be found.
Why isn't she like, hey, Christine, I know you're
studying for that exam. Do you need a couple hours
tonight? I can come over and you can even
leave and go to my quiet houseand study.
Yeah. Or drop the kids.
Off here, whatever. Study in front of Janelle's fish
tank for all we fucking care and I'll watch the kids.
I could help you because she's going to the gym at 4:45 in the

(48:02):
morning and then her kids go toschool and what else is she
doing? I mean, honestly, these people,
what are they doing with all oftheir time?
But that's what makes me sad forher, her again, because she's
like, I went into this thinking that these ladies were here to
help me raise my kids and I'm doing it alone.
And gosh darn it, I feel like I'm failing at it.
And you know, that's such a horrible feeling to go into a

(48:24):
marriage or a relationship in general, thinking you have a
partner and then feeling like your partner's not there for
you, much less you go into a marriage with two other wives.
So you think you have three adults that have your back and
none of them have your back right now?
And then you've brought in even another one that you were
supposed to be OK with. You were supposed to be a

(48:45):
welcoming and all of that with Robyn.
Yeah. Where's Robyn?
Who's she helping? No, she had this big kumbaya
moment with Robyn. At that cafe restaurant thing.
Yeah, they never address why that didn't stick, we hear.
Yeah, that came and went. We hear down the Grapevine,
like, externally, that it's because Robyn was talking about

(49:08):
it to Kody and lying. But like, they don't address
that on the show. So if you're a viewer watching
in real time back in like 2011, you don't know what's going on
and you're just like, I don't understand.
Like she feels alone. What?
And when I watched this show, however many years ago, and I I
didn't see this show when it was originally airing, but I did

(49:31):
watch it streaming shortly after.
And as a casual viewer, it's like I wasn't putting these
pieces together and I wasn't, you know, going where is
everybody? What is everybody doing?
Because these statements, they, I don't know if it's just
through editing. I don't get it.
But there's these big dramatic statements about how she is
failing at raising her kids on her own.

(49:52):
She is separating from her sister wives.
Their family is disintegrating. And it's like, these are big
things and it's just treated so haphazardly.
It's very bizarre. Yeah, she's talking about
postpartum in other seasons and that's never even addressed
either. And I think truly is 3 now, but

(50:14):
you're technically postpartum hormonally and physically for
like 2 years after having a babyand they're not being supportive
at all of her. Like, yeah, now there's baby
Saul, but people should be extrasupportive of the moms with the
youngest. And it's just not happening.
And I think that part of the issue here is obviously Kody

(50:39):
pitting them against each other and lying, but that there was
never this camaraderie from the get go and that each of them was
used as a different type of glue to try to fix what was
already failing. Based on a made-up religious
cult blah blah blah. Like it's all a House of Cards.

(51:01):
Because even if like me and my
best friend joined a commune together that was like this, I
wouldn't be able to distance myself from her after she had a
baby. I'd be like, right, what do you
need? Or But now there's this like
feeling of our kids are actually siblings and that's not that

(51:22):
connections not happening. I I find it so sad and tragic
and it just goes to show to me that it was never meant to be
like this whole thing was forced from the get go.
And the, the, the examples that they point to, even culturally
in the AUB or these other cults, it's like the examples that

(51:43):
they show are women that don't speak up, You know, they keep
sweet, they're just supposed to fall in line.
The husband does whatever and they're whatever.
So these aren't healthy relationships overall, like just
intrinsically. No, they're competitive.
It's like pitting women against each other, like which one of
you can get my attention and make me happy and keep me

(52:05):
around? And it's the opposite of what
you would think, where it's like these women that are
supporting other women and instead it's pitting women
against each other for one man.
It's. Nasty.
It's the whole thing's nasty, I mean.
Colleen with AK tried to give ussome insight and she was just a
little rough around the edges. We do meet her again later in

(52:26):
the show, so we will be reintroduced to Colleen.
We'll learn more about her. Maybe she'll have a little bit
more of a soft approach because our first introduction to her
was a little a little rugged. I doubt it, but I am excited to
see how the hair has progressed.
Oh yes, yes, Kody says we're taking the kids to the park to

(52:47):
hang out while Christine takes her test.
And I have to laugh because in this episode there is so many
examples of failed instead of failed because of their Utah
access failed. So he's like every time they
talk about failed, failed, failed, it's like filled.
It's not. Do you think she failed?
Do you think she failed? Do you think she failed?

(53:07):
It's like, Oh my God, they show them briefly at the park.
What do you call that thing that they're under?
A pergola. This is I wrote down pergola.
No. Did I write down pergola?
I wrote down gazebo because I thought a pergola had slats on
the top. You're probably right.
It's like, you know, it's like a shed without the sides.
It's like there's a roof and posts that are holding it up.

(53:30):
People hate us. Really.
People do hate us 'cause there's probably, I know they're
yelling at Eskimo Brothers. Shout out to my friend Kody,
who's like, I was yelling Eskimo Brothers at the gym.
Damn. My gosh, it's so funny.
And it's true. I mean like, I don't know what
it's called. What I have to say to Kody, we
can't all be Eskimo brothers. So the fact that you know that
term, darlin, what do you have to tell us?

(53:52):
I want to hear that story. Tell us that story, please.
I'll share that story after we're done recording.
Wink, wink. Nod.
Can't wait. Kody, don't hate me.
Oh, Kody. Anyway, we're under the gondola.
So they're under the gondola, yes, they're under the pergola

(54:15):
that's solid roofed and they're just doing whatever, setting up
food, blah, blah, blah. Fill in time, fill in space.
Some people said some things, I didn't care.
About Kody says her energy is kind of low, referencing
Christine. Like oh, did he talk to her on
the phone? Did he get a text?
Her energy is kind of low, so I don't know.
And then Janelle's like, I'm just, I she was just was really

(54:35):
prepared this time. I know she was really prepared.
And Robyn's like, well, I'm nervous now.
And they're just kind of all going back and forth about their
themselves. Their feelings about Christine's
feelings. Oh my gosh.
And then Christine walks up from the parking lot with Truly in

(54:56):
tow and a wagon that's full of stuff or said picnic.
And who was the boy that was there helping?
That's like truly is protector Hunter, Hunter Hunter was
helping her come and then Mckelty was also with her.
And I'm just thinking to myself, she's meeting everybody there

(55:18):
with her test results and they couldn't even bring truly for
her. Like where was truly?
Why is she bringing a literal wagon full of whatever was in
there if it was food or supplies or something?
And you were totally right that she at least brought Truly,
because Kody says like hey, true or something.
Yeah, come on over here like some bridged.

(55:40):
Version of her name and it's like so truly wasn't there.
So it's probably not even the same day.
I this is it. Like there probably are elements
of this episode that are either reshot or didn't happen in the
same order or whatever and fuck that.
I feel like Mckel T was probably at home watching Truly and
then Hunter was texting Mckel T like we're here and then

(56:00):
Hunter came to help get everything and bring him back.
And it's just so lame. It's.
Disjointed and dumb, and you set this whole scene up just for
Did you fail? Did you fail?
Did you fail? I fail.
But, and it's like other reality shows manage to do these
things without us being distracted.
It's like they think we as viewers are idiots and we're not

(56:23):
going to notice. It's like Christine just went to
take a test. Kody brought all the kids to the
park, yet she's arriving with children.
Like it's dumb. I want to know what is truly
going on, but truly going on with the trulys.
What's truly going on behind thescenes.
Because you've got Meri that's 10 shades darker in the face
than the body. You've got these setup scenes

(56:48):
that are haphazard. You've got fed lines to the
kids. It's the start of reality TV in
this era, but it's also past the start enough and we're into
the fifth season, so it's just a little confusing that it's so

(57:12):
haphazard. It's almost like I get the vibe
from Kody in this scene that heshowed up, he had a time, he had
to show up and he did whatever.
And it's almost like they're half assing it.
So like the production company, they're half assing it because
they fucking suck. But then why are you as the star
of the show, as lead talent, particularly the adults?

(57:33):
Why aren't you walking up with her?
What? What is going on here?
Like why are you? Like why aren't you going to
help her? Haphazardly participating in
your own television show, it's very weird.
And then all of a sudden, out of nowhere, out of nowhere, she
goes. I passed.
No, I'm. Telling you it's that crazy that

(57:55):
all of a sudden she just says that like it's like a
conversation like we're having and then all of a sudden it's.
I passed, yeah. Kody's like what happened is she
goes, I passed. And then they're eating burritos
or tacos or Taco salads or something.
I don't even know. I'm like, you just set up this
entire episode to lead up to this moment, and then that's how
you have her announce it just as she's kind of like standing

(58:18):
there. It's like.
Very weird. The rain in Spain falls mainly
on the plain. I don't even.
Know it's hard to even comment on because it's like, what is
going on? Like these people, even the way
they were talking about it, they this was totally reshot, this
was totally a pickup. This was something because, you
know, when Janelle's talking about it, she's like, I don't

(58:39):
know, I feel like yeah, she probably, she tried really hard
and whatever. And Robyn's like, they're just
talking yeah, like they're just like talking like not even in
the same. There's that whatever vibe that
happens when you actually are anticipatory, right?
If someone's coming with some news, you're like, Oh my gosh,
like what's it going to be? And that was completely missing.
The kids were like bored, like the energy was not there at all.

(59:02):
She's showing up with her child after waiting for these
results. And that's why I'm saying it's
like, Christine literally says Ipassed and it feels like the
rain. It's rainfall mainly on the
plane. Like she'd like, they asked her
to say this like 500 times. They're probably like.
Could you tell us you passed again?
I passed and then they chose that as the clip.

(59:25):
That's the best thing, yes. That's why I'm like dying about
it. Like, Oh my God, Eliza, do a
little much, but we get to the couch with the adults.
So then this transition also backs up our suspicions here
that she says I passed. There's a few cutaway shots to
them eating food. And then now we're on the couch.

(59:47):
Like there was, there wasn't
even anything happening. It's like she said I passed and
then it was like, that's that. Now we're going to the couch to
wrap up the episode. We get a moment alone with
Christine speaking to the camera, solo interview and
Christine. Is talking about how she has
been thinking of this moment and thinking of selling her first
home and getting that check and thinking what debt can I pay

(01:00:12):
off first with this check and asking the family what debt
needs to be paid off first with my first big check.
And she says that to the camera.
And then they go to the family on the couch, the adults on the
couch, And we've got Robyn. No, I'm not going to go.

(01:00:33):
And we've got Christine, and we've got Meri, and we've got
Janelle and we've got Kody. And Christine is reminiscing and
talking about studying by herself and that her kids had to
pick up the slack because she had to study by herself.

(01:00:54):
Well, she starts out by saying that she was thinking about life
in Lehigh and how they all supported each other when they
used to live there together. And then she says, here I'm all
alone so the kids have to pick up the slack.
I feel like we are feeling as a family to translate that, she
says. I feel like we're failing as a

(01:01:14):
family. But what she actually said was I
feel like we are filling as a family.
We're not a support system, and that's frightening.
Frightening. It's really sad too, she says.
I created this void in my kids lives.
I didn't have the support from my sister Waves.
I feel like we're failing as a family right now.

(01:01:37):
Sorry. We haven't gotten together a lot
and it's like she's saying allthese deep things, like she's
finally coming to terms and likesaying how she feels and outing
the reality and nobody knows what to say.
Except for Meri comes in, which is.
Bullshit. I wouldn't go so far as to call

(01:01:59):
us a failure. We need to continue working on
things. We need to continue working
towards things that we want. It's like like a wet bar.
Like a wet bar, Like Meri, whereare you?
What are you working on? This is up until this point I've
been primarily distracted by what the fuck Robyn's doing with
her time. Now I'm going what are you all
doing with your time? Meri's what?
Talking to strangers on the Internet?

(01:02:21):
Oh, well, we just need to keep working towards what we want.
And Christine's trying to drop these hard truths and no one is
willing to hear them. And you've got Kody's eyes
rolling so far back in his head that I don't think they're ever
going to come back from hell. No God.
And she goes, I wanted to pass for the money.

(01:02:43):
I wanted to be sure that we could afford these houses and be
in these houses so that we could be together.
And that's just so sad. Like what we're saying earlier,
it's not about her passion for wanting to do this.
It's not that she's enjoying it.She's not studying it and
learning it easily because she doesn't give a fuck about it.
She's doing it for the money andit's very hard to learn about

(01:03:07):
something when you don't care about it.
Right. And also to almost like catch up
on their already existing obligation, right?
Like they've made these choices,they're buying these homes,
they're doing this stuff. And she feels the pressure to
not only make this happen in thefuture, but to like, we've
already started this and I have to catch up.
Like I've got to make this happen and fuck that unnecessary

(01:03:30):
pressure. I think she's been seeing
herself as like a side characterfor so long and now she's
getting like that main characterenergy and nobody knows how to
handle it because she says a lotof things in this couch
interview that are hard hitting and no one knows what to say.

(01:03:52):
I think they're shocked that she's coming.
Maybe she's had a cider before the interview.
Yes, she even says she goes. I wanted more than a husband.
That's why I chose this life. And then Kody's got these shifty
ass eyes and I just want to slap him across his fat chin,
No. God, not his fat chin.

(01:04:14):
It's like a restating of her tagline from the show.
I wanted Sister wives more than a husband.
I needed the support and that's why I chose this life.
I don't want to raise these kids all by myself.
It's been 2 years of me doing that.
She says I don't reach out and ask for help and you don't

(01:04:35):
either. That's not what I signed up for.
And now we realize why she's so red nosed.
From the cider. She's angry from her anger.
She's got the cider in her and it's given her the courage and
she's worked up and she's a pale girl like me and we get red in

(01:04:56):
the nose and we're mad and she's been holding it in.
I applaud her for the truth bombs that she's dropped this
entire episode and nobody had anything to say.
And you can tell Janelle is soaking it in.
They show Janelle looking at her a few times and I think

(01:05:16):
Janelle is legitimately the onlyone not worried about covering
their tracks and their ass. Being defensive.
And she's the only one that's, like digesting it for what it
is. Kody's got his eyes rolling back
in his head, and he's shifting his eyes back and forth like,
really quickly, OK? Like, he does this weird thing
where he's looks back and forth really fast because he's trying

(01:05:39):
to see and gauge who's realizing what and what lie he's going
to have to spin next. And then Robyn's like
comprehending it still. She's like 10 paces at least
back, probably 1000 paces. And then Meri's trying to defend
and cover up because she's doing shady shit behind everyone's

(01:06:00):
back. It's like you can see it on
their faces that they don't know how to react to her because
they're all hiding something. Absolutely.
I mean no one has anything to say.
According to this edit, they don't show anybody saying
anything except for Meri, who basically has a defensive.
Pretends to defend. It austerity, right?

(01:06:20):
Like, well, I don't think that we're actually failing.
Superficially. What do you mean you don't think
we're failing? Like, Oh my God, you're clearly
failing. We.
Just need to keep working towards the things that we want.
Yeah, right. Like anybody could fucking say
that. Oh my God.
Anybody could come off the street and feed the.
Stranger that knows nothing. Yeah, absolutely.
I feel like it's quite dramatic, but there's still an element,

(01:06:43):
I don't know how to describe it, where I, as a casual viewer,
I'm going like, is it really all that dramatic?
But it doesn't go anywhere. This is it.
There's no resolve. There's no like next steps.
There's no nothing like that was the end of the episode.
Because they leave and go their separate ways again.
Right, so now the episode's going to wrap, and we as viewers
are going to go about our lives until next week when we come
back and they're on their next adventure.

(01:07:05):
And in their lives, it's the same thing.
Christine talks about that in her book.
They come together for these couch moments.
And that was like the closest thing they had to real
conversations, which is on a set being filmed with light
therapy. And then?
You leave producers and then younext time you see each other is
when you're going to film something and there's a crew

(01:07:27):
there. I think this episode really
portrays one person screaming out for help and everyone else
turning their backs because it'sthe easy thing to do and there's
money on the line and the houses are on the line.
And it's funny because now in reality TV nowadays, nobody be

(01:07:47):
turning their backs. They'd all be confrontational
for the drama, for the. Show yeah, the producers would
be poking and prodding to make it even more escalated.
That's why it's so you like, it's so cool doing this rewatch
to me because it's like mind blowing how much reality TV has
changed. It's mind blowing that this is a

(01:08:10):
family that literally started out together in this completely
different situation. And we're seeing it fall apart
in real time. We're seeing some people fight
for it. We're seeing other people
pretend to fight for it. And I didn't get that at the
time when I was catching episodes here and there.
Right? Yeah, absolutely.

(01:08:30):
And now I'm like, this is so blatant and in front of
everyone's faces. Like how could you not see the
demise of this family coming 1000 miles away?
And also, there's an element of where they started being cult
members. I'm saying started as a family.
Yeah, and where they broke off?

(01:08:50):
Right, So they're they're fundamentals as fundamentalists
like they literally were living a life that had a lot of
denials walls up, we don't address things, passive
aggressive behaviors, etcetera.
So that was like how they were underlying started and
Christine, you know, as they reference in becoming sister

(01:09:12):
wives, you know, she was the shesaved their bacon, according to
Kody, like she probably broughta brevity.
She. Was she was lighthearted and she
kind of took pressures off of people in different ways, but
then and and that worked for them in a way where they kind of
were going through the motionsfor a long time.

(01:09:32):
And then when Robyn joined, it was at the same time as they
were started filming a show and it just, I just feel like they
were not great to begin with. I just with Christy and I very
much so see the keep suite thingplaying out.
And I think she was naive. I think she was raised in a

(01:09:52):
polygamy situation that wasn't abusive.
And so she had these rose colored glasses on and then, you
know, she has her wedding night with Kody.
She has these other sister wife come in and slowly like her rose
colored glasses are coming offand she's not keeping sweet

(01:10:15):
anymore. She's learning who she is as an
individual. She's learning that she has
autonomy as a woman. And I'm seeing her changing in
front of me slowly but surely. And we haven't seen her in a lot
of episodes. And then all of a sudden we see
her in this episode very, very heavily, and the keep sweet

(01:10:36):
thing is just falling apart for her.
Yeah. And it's fascinating.
It's morbidly fascinating. Morbidly, Like I'm morbidly
obese. Not to detract, but I just had a
moment where, you know, talking about Christine's book.

(01:10:56):
Meri has been tossing around
this like teasing people about writing a book, doing whatever.
But she's very merry, right? Like this?
A. Decade, Like what the fuck, Meri
Meri, if you're writing a book, I have a working title for you,
Not keeping sweet or no longer keeping sweet.
So Christine, if you're going to write another book, if any of

(01:11:18):
y'all cult members are going to be writing a book, something
about not keeping sweet, No longer keeping sweet, I won't
keep sweet. That's the title of your book.
I want to hear Janelle's story, and I know that Christine's
been encouraging Janelle to write a book.
I want to hear Janelle's story because she came from a life
that was so different and she was convinced of this life.

(01:11:41):
And for a while on the show, I thought she was the only one
that was like still convinced of it and trying to keep it up.
And then she's like wavered and I, I'm very curious about her
story. But I think of the OG 3 she's
probably still the one that is the least anti polygamist like

(01:12:03):
in current seasons which you have not seen.
She doesn't speak I'll of being in polygamy.
But some could argue that she's like the most, and I hate to
say it, abused of the group because she didn't have any
sort of role model for polygamy and didn't come from it.
So she was shocked and manipulated and didn't know how

(01:12:26):
to act and thought she couldn't speak up and was confused and
thought she was doing the right thing.
Was probably the most scared to leave because she had to prove
everyone wrong in her life. And I think that there is
something in her history before the marriage even happened to
make her get there. Because she says I didn't know I

(01:12:49):
could speak up. I didn't know I had a voice.
So it makes me think that there's something from her
childhood, from even before that, just in the Mormon
religion or in her family, that made her feel like she didn't
have a voice. Because usually you don't think
you have a voice in this religion because the first wife
is the voice and the husband is the voice above the first wife.

(01:13:11):
But she didn't come from that, so she didn't have the first
wife idea hanging over her head.
Does that make sense? Yes, I guess I just.
Something with her dad, you know, her dad, Her dad died when
she was young or left when shewas young.
I can't. Caretaker or can't?
Undertaker. Undertaker for the family.

(01:13:33):
And then she married Meri's brother and Meri's from a
polygamist family. They just didn't do the polygamy
thing. Janelle and him.
I, I'm not saying that she, I think that you're right that
she, I would love to hear her story, but I'm saying today I
think she's the one that's probably the least, It doesn't
feel like she's the one that's going to like come out with her

(01:13:53):
story. No, I don't think she'd be OK.
I don't want to hear her story yet.
Give her 20 years and I want to hear her story.
I don't think she'd be honest yet.
I think she would hide A lot still.
I want to hear like the honest, raw truth.
Like, why did you marry Meri's brother?
Why did you divorce him? Why did you decide that this
life was the one like? And then why did you marry your

(01:14:14):
ex sister in Like, there's so many things.
If I'm being honest, I think that there's something about
sexuality that happened there inthe first marriage.
Whether it's her sexuality or his sexuality, there is some
underlying thing there that nobody probably still knows
about to this day. But I think that there's a lot

(01:14:35):
of like dark history in her life, and I think that people
could learn a lot from it. I think she's a compelling
person that she's kind of kept clammed up and kind of she's
spoken out here and there and she portrayed herself as the
strong one that made a lot of money, that handled the
finances. And then I think slowly that

(01:14:57):
idea crumbled. But she has been more of the
Stoic 1 so. I agree.
I think there would be some interesting things to unearth
there because there's a lot thatwe don't know.
If she would be honest about it,and she doesn't have to be, she
doesn't owe anybody that. She doesn't owe anybody that.
Interesting to learn down the road when she's comfortable with

(01:15:17):
it. Yeah, and able to be honest.
Oh, right. Wow.
Well, what an I love how this episode was like primarily about
Christine and her failures. And we're wrapping it up talking
about how we're so fascinated by Janelle's unknowns.
You never know what you're goingto get on this.
Academic process, like a box of chocolates.
I can't afford them because my name's Robyn, but you never know

(01:15:42):
what you're going to get. The time has come for mustard
seed and shit stain. Now normally I allow you, I ask
you to go first because. You allow me, You ask me.
Usually I ask you to go first because I was raised a proper
gentleman and my mother, you know, should be proud of what
she did. Well, no.

(01:16:04):
OK, Never taking that all back. Ordinarily, I ask you to go
first because I'm a good person.Because you're scared to tell
your truth. You're trying to keep sweet over
there. Because I want to see what
you're going to do, because I'm scared.
You need a leader. You need a leader.
So I'm going to go with my mustard seed and my mustard seed

(01:16:28):
this episode. Oh God, why didn't I want to go
first? I don't even care about this
episode. It was primarily about
Christine. All right, I'm going to go
first. Can I jump the line next?
I give you permission, little woman.
I give you permission, woman. You can go first.
You so much. You can go first.

(01:16:49):
I'm going to give my mustard seed to Christine.
It's because she was honest, butalso it's because she was a cool
mom and she took her daughter to do something cool and show
her, all right, if you want to do this career, like let's go do
this thing. Even if she was in her own life

(01:17:10):
doing the complete opposite anddoing a career that she
obviously wasn't passionate about, she still wanted more for
her daughter and took her daughter to do this cool thing
in the fashion world. That alone is why I'm giving her
my mustard seed, because she supported her daughter and got
to do something cool with her daughter.
And she took Kody along to pretend that he was a part of

(01:17:33):
it, even though he wasn't. So all the power to you, sister.
I have no option but to say I
agree. OK about that mustard seed.
I'm going to give my mustard seed to little Isabel because
Isabel guilted Christine for not spending time with her when
she was studying her test. And while I do think the vibe of

(01:17:56):
this episode was that we're supposed to support Christine,
I'm not drinking that kool-aid.
I'm still going. Fuck yeah.
Isabel, Guilt. That mother who's ignoring you.
Terrible.
Terrible. To be real, who else gets a
fucking mustard seed? Who?

(01:18:16):
Nobody. Nobody.
The excavator for finally breaking ground.
Here I was going to selfishly take the mustard seed on this
one and you took it from me and it was the only person who
could even get one. Well, had your tongue or
something? I don't know why you're taking
so fucking lot. Because I literally just did not
want to give it to Christine. That is funny.

(01:18:37):
Like there was only one person that could have got 1 and I
wouldn't give it to her. What is wrong with me?
You. Could have given it to Mekelty
for seeing her passions through, but we all knew that wasn't
going to happen. Honey, that would be a lie.
OK, so shit stain, darling. And if you take what I was going
to say, then I'm just going to complain about it on this
podcast. Oh my God, shit stain.

(01:19:00):
My shit stain is going to go to Meri.
Because I think she started reading the comments about the
Sister Wives jewelry thinking it would be funny, and then
realized very quickly that they were people, like truly being
like, what the fuck is this? And then she didn't know how to

(01:19:20):
backtrack. So it's like, OK, you dummy,
why'd you do that? Second of all, she tries to make
this comment through Christine's honesty being like oh I
wouldn't call this a failure, like trying to pretend like

(01:19:41):
she's going to save this conversation and it just
massively fails and doesn't makesense.
And thirdly, because we have cultural appropriation to a
whole new level here with complete and utter change of the
facial color from the neck andthe chesticles.

(01:20:05):
And I'm just so confused by her choices in makeup, in life, in
everything. I just don't understand it.
I don't understand it. You know, Meri's attempt at
devaluing or invalidating Christine's opinion, which?

(01:20:26):
She's done before, which she does, proudly, proudly.
Yeah, is in itself a failure. So it's like, fuck you, Meri,
you fail. Like Gross.
But the chartreuse shirt, she thinks that she's really cool in
this episode and she's just not.
She's earning a shit stain. Her.
Face is kind of like a shit stain, yeah.

(01:20:49):
Fucking help this lady please. Now I can tell you who can't
help her, which is my shit stain, Robyn Brown.
Wow, she probably is the one encouraging Meri's look.
She's like, you look great, Mayor.
Yeah, Robyn is getting my shit stain because of all of the
stupid things that she said in this episode, which isn't really
that different for her, but you layer on top of that her trying

(01:21:12):
to make Kody sound like he's a gentleman.
Oh, Oh yeah. Looking away while a woman
disrobes and Hawking that terrible, terrible, terrible
jewelry. The Estavia.
And making it seem like everyone else's dreams should fall
behind hers, which is honestly kind of bizarre that it ever

(01:21:34):
even came up because it's like, did we ever hear about Robyn
dreaming of being a jewelry designer?
Like it just kind of came out ofnowhere.
Well, she had a dream. Well, no, that's right.
She had a dream, and now she's producing said jewelry, selling
it at such a high price that noone wants to buy it.
And she will continue to ride this terrible, terrible train

(01:21:55):
into shit town. Meanwhile, her £5 sterling
silver WS will cut your chest ifyou.
Even if you try to wear it, her jewelry will injure you.
It will cause bodily harm. You'll pay way too much.
Allegedly, allegedly, allegedly.If you buy it secondhand, this
is all alleged. Also, if you know where we can
pick up a piece of my sister wife's jewelry, please let us

(01:22:18):
know. Our keep sweet moment this week
comes from. YouTube and it is from Tonya
Carter, 72. Tonya Harding.
Tonya Harding, 72. Dang, now?
It Tanya Carter, 72, says this intro is everything.
Laugh emoji OMGI love your podcast.

(01:22:38):
You guys crack me up. Keep up the diabolical review of
this ridiculous show we all got trapped into watching.
You 2 are my mustard seed. Oh, I can't believe someone said
I'm their mustard seed. I feel like all of the reasons
that my parents think I'm a failure don't matter anymore.
I feel like I'm a success. Christopher yeah, my mustard

(01:23:02):
seed is going to go to you. Oh, because the intro is fucking
amazing and it is all you and you work your ass off and I just
fucking love you And happy Mother's Day, Christopher.
Thank. You for wishing me Happy
Mother's Day, Tanya, push that seed deep, deep inside of me.