Not So Secret Lives
Get ready for unfiltered conversations about dating, life, love, sex, and relationships with two best friends who have truly been through it all. From epic dating fails and steamy confessions to the ups and downs of finding real connection, we’re sharing our most raw and relatable stories with plenty of laughs and zero judgment. Whether you’re navigating the single life, figuring out love, or diving back into the dating pool, join us as we explore every twist and turn with honesty, humor, and heart. Stay Connected! Want to keep the conversation going? Follow us on social media! Instagram: @not_so_secret_lives TikToc: @not.so.secret.lives Facebook: Not So Secret Lives Podcast YouTube: @notsosecretlives Don’t forget to share your thoughts and tag us! We’d love to hear from you.
Episodes
November 5, 2025 • 44 mins
Love is in the air — and we are so here for it! Big news... Karina and Chan are in relationships! 💕 It started off hot and heavy (are you surprised?) and it’s been going really well. In this episode, we’re getting real about the difference between love bombing and the real deal, and what it’s like navigating other people’s opinions when things move fast. From judgmental comments to unsolicited advice, we’re breaking down why you s...
Mark as Played
October 17, 2025 • 48 mins
This one’s been sitting in the vault — recorded back on August 21st, it’s our lost episode! We’re diving into knowing your worth — in relationships, in life, and within yourself. We’ve gone through the motions, learned the hard lessons, and finally figured out what it truly means to stand in your value.
As always, it’s fun, it’s funny, and full of real talk (with a little spice, of course). Because when you know your worth, everyt...
Mark as Played
September 17, 2025 • 71 mins
When Dr. Becky's team reached out and asked if we wanted to have her on we couldn't say yes fast enough! This week we’re joined by Dr. Becky Whetstone, therapist, author, and creator of the new book “I (Think) I Want Out: What to Do When One of You Wants to End Your Marriage” — an essential couples guide filled with real answers and guidance for navigating a marriage crisis. We dive into what inspired Dr. Becky to pursue therapy, h...
Mark as Played
August 28, 2025 • 50 mins
We’re back, besties! 🎉 After a little summer break, your favorite duo is finally back behind the mics and catching you up on everything we’ve been up to. From vacations and dating adventures, to Karina’s official hard launch with her man, Chantell still thriving in the single life, house selling drama, and (drum roll, please)… us moving in together! 🏡✨ Still raw, still real, and of course—packed with all the spice you’ve been mis...
Mark as Played
June 27, 2025 • 48 mins
This week, we’re flipping the script on what it really means to be in our Good Girl / Soft Girl Era—and trust us, it’s not all sundresses and silence. We dive into the power of softness as women: embracing femininity, surrendering control in the right spaces, and still being bold, vocal, and in charge of our needs. We talk about dominance and submission in the bedroom, the desire to be taken care of, and the trust it takes to lean ...
Mark as Played
May 29, 2025 • 42 mins
In this powerful and honest episode, we dive deep into the complicated relationship between shame and self-confidence. From the invisible weight of social norms to the internal battles we fight daily, we explore how shame shows up in our lives—and how it holds us back from becoming our most confident, authentic selves. We talk about the importance of surrounding yourself with friends who lift you up, how positive self-talk can shif...
Mark as Played
May 14, 2025 • 58 mins
In this special episode, we’re stepping outside of our usual niche to shine a light on a topic that affects so many but is often left in the dark—mental health and suicide prevention. In honor of Mental Health Awareness Month, we’re joined by Brook, a passionate Community Suicide Prevention Outreach Specialist with Nomi Health and the Co-Chair of the Utah Board of Directors for the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention.
Brook...
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May 6, 2025 • 68 mins
Hey look Mom! We made it! Episode 20 coming in hot with our most requested topic... Male and female POV on dating! This week, we’re getting into the male perspective with a special guest who doesn’t hold back. After a 14-year marriage and 10 years in the single world, he’s got stories, opinions, and a great insight on what he wants. He breaks down what dating looks like from his point of view, sharing real-life examples, frustratio...
Mark as Played
April 29, 2025 • 48 mins
In this episode, Karina and Chan are back with all the juicy updates! From unexpected dates to wild encounters out in the real world, we’re spilling it all. Chan went out with someone we never saw coming, and we're diving into whether relationships can really work when your beliefs totally clash. We’re talking compatibility, real-life connections, sex, and why Karina and Chan are convinced they’re destined to stay single (spoiler: ...
Mark as Played
April 23, 2025 • 53 mins
This week, we’re getting real (and a little rebellious) with our guest Jennie — who left the church and an 18-year marriage like it was a bad group chat and never looked back. She takes us through her journey of shedding shame, realizing her body wasn’t just for making casseroles and babies, and figuring out who she actually is outside of religion and marriage.
We talk about the awkward (and sometimes hilarious) parts of finding ...
Mark as Played
April 15, 2025 • 37 mins
This week, we’re busting myths and dropping facts—from erectile dysfunction and STIs to the age-old claim that men want sex more than women (uhh, let’s talk about that). We’re calling out the BS and keeping it all the way real.
Fellas, want to know where the G spot really is? We got you. And yes, we’re spilling the tea on the G spot for men too—because pleasure ain’t one-sided.
And ladies, let’s talk about the 7 most erogenous zo...
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April 8, 2025 • 78 mins
Getting Spiritually Smacked with Tarot Readings by Haylie
In this episode, we sit down for a raw, honest, and unexpectedly emotional tarot reading with our magical, intuitive, and absolutely radiant friend Haylie. From the moment the cards hit the table, the truths came pouring out — and baby, they did NOT hold back. 💀✨
We dive into conversations about life, love, depression, growth, and everything in between. Haylie’s reading di...
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March 11, 2025 • 51 mins
This week, we sit down with an incredible guest whose journey is nothing short of inspiring. She went from being in a relationship with a Mormon man and raising five children to embracing her true self, falling in love with a woman, and launching her own dance business, Floor Play by Fay. She’s all about confidence, empowerment, and helping women feel comfortable in their own skin—one high-heeled dance step at a time. We’re talking...
Mark as Played
February 25, 2025 • 70 mins
Well, it happened. We don’t know how we got here but, here we are! Dating in your 40s! Buckle up, because it’s a wild ride! In this episode, we dive into the absolute chaos that is modern dating at this stage in life—the red flags, the disappointments, the rare gems, and the hilarious horror stories. But of course, things take a turn when our audio guy decides to put us in the hot seat, asking some unexpected and personal questions...
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February 18, 2025 • 65 mins
Ever wondered what it really means to be in an open relationship? In this episode, we sit down with the author of For Better or Even Better -Lauren Hayes, who is also a swinger and ENM (Ethical Non-Monogamy) lifestyle and relationship coach. She takes us deep into the world of ENM, sharing the truths, myths, breaking down misconceptions, and spicy details about love without limits. We also dive into her book, exploring how couples ...
Mark as Played
February 12, 2025 • 47 mins
Look, we’re not experts… but we’ve got Google to help us out! We took a deep dive into the internet’s list of dating do’s and don’ts, and let’s just say… we have thoughts. In this episode, we’re breaking down all the so-called “rules” of dating—and giving our unfiltered, and slightly chaotic opinions. Some we totally agree with, and others? Yeah, not so much. Expect plenty of laughs, opinions, debates, and probably a few side-eye m...
Mark as Played
February 3, 2025 • 52 mins
After a 2 week break and a couple recording hiccups were back baby! We’re officially in the studio, and we’re bringing the same raw, unfiltered energy with us! In this episode, we spill the tea on our recent dates—some good, some… well, let’s just say memorable. We dive into our dating styles, how emotional attachment plays a role when sex is involved.... or does it?! Lots of laughs and some side commentary from our new partner in ...
Mark as Played
January 13, 2025 • 60 mins
In this episode, we're diving back into the world of dating apps and trying to navigate finding love (or at least a good laugh) while juggling our crazy schedules. Between sharing hilarious messages from the apps, and recording while under the weather, we’re embracing the messy reality of modern dating.
We had some scheduling conflicts so next week episode we will be shooting the shiz with our special guests from the podcast A Lit...
Mark as Played
January 6, 2025 • 72 mins
Let’s kick off the new year with confidence! In this episode, we dive into the power of self-confidence, affirmations, and positive self-talk. Learn how to be kinder to yourself, embrace your worth, start over stronger than ever, and let go of anything that no longer serves you. It's time to start fresh and step into your best self!
Book recommendations in this episode
(We are not sponsored or affiliated with either book recommend...
Mark as Played
December 23, 2024 • 58 mins
In this episode, we dive into the fascinating science behind sex! From surprising fun facts to the quirks of human biology, we’re exploring what makes our bodies and minds tick in the bedroom. Join us for hilarious conversations, unexpected discoveries, and our signature dose of candid humor. Whether you’re here for the knowledge or the giggles, this episode will leave you entertained and enlightened. Don’t miss it!
Thank you for a...
Mark as Played
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