July 2, 2024 • 44 mins
BFG, Mark, and Spit discuss various topics including Spit's experience as a new dad, his career as a musician, and the challenges of traveling. They also touch on the importance of home and the value of online friendships. The conversation highlights the bond formed through shared interests and the positive community in the crypto space. The conversation covers various topics including the importance of family support in the music industry, the transition of the music industry with the rise of the internet, and the challenges of balancing work and family life. The hosts and guest discuss their parenting philosophies and the importance of supporting their children's interests and passions. They also share their favorite movies and the impact of kindness in their lives.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
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Speaker 2 (00:11):
Welcome to another episode of Odds and Ends.
Here we're here with Mark BFGand our good friend
Spitfunkolips, who we metoriginally on Farcaster a few
months back I guess it's morelike five months ago now or so,
since I think I joined aroundFebruary.
But we've gotten to know SpitFunko you know pretty well over
this past few months.
Just an awesome dude, reallyfunny guy, now new dad and
(00:34):
everything, so doing thatjourney.
Awesome musician who is amember of a band that I used to
actually listen to growing up,which is kind of weird because,
you know, obviously I didn'tknow him at all.
So it's kind of cool to youknow everything go full circle
there.
But how's it going, spitt?
How are you today, man?
Speaker 3 (00:50):
I'm great gentlemen.
Thanks for having me Pleasureto be on board.
I'm a big fan of the show.
Speaker 1 (00:56):
We're excited to have you especially coming right off
of vacation.
I mean you made a special triphome for this.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
I did.
We were going to stay.
You know we're supposed to bein the Outer Banks.
Still, I told my wife.
I looked my wife dead in theeye and said babe, we got a
podcast, we're going to have topack it up.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
Yes, I wasn't sure if you were joking for a second
dude.
Speaker 3 (01:12):
Yeah, I was like man.
I hope you didn't call it earlyfor this dude, you know it's
actually even fun needed to getto, so I mean as far as the
totem pole goes, not, you know,the uh, the odds and ends is
right there with uh right yeah,you know, I mean if john jett
wasn't opening probably be above, but yeah fair, true, fair.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
When are you guys going to that?
Speaker 3 (01:36):
dude.
So we went saturday night.
We, uh, my daughter a lot offirsts, um, obviously a new dad,
um, as well as mark and mydaughter first time putting her
feet in the sand over the pastweek, first time being in the
ocean, first time being in apool and her first rock and roll
concert.
Speaker 1 (01:52):
So a lot of firsts.
That's awesome.
Dude, How'd she do going in thewater?
Speaker 3 (01:57):
She did great.
You know she loves the waterSince the day we brought her
home baths um spitting up overherself peeing on everything she
loves liquids.
So that's very well.
Speaker 2 (02:08):
Dude, good, good for you, though we me and my wife,
you know, we really we stillhaven't gotten to take our kid
to to the ocean.
And that's like I can't believeit, you know, and he's eight
and all, and I feel bad that,but we just it's something we
need to to this summer to go flydown to florida.
But just a lot of stuff came up.
My mom's or my, my wife's, uh,you know, grandmother passed
away and all and kind of threwthings into turmoil.
(02:29):
But like man, I know, I feellike I'm letting my kid down
here as a parent, not notbringing him to the ocean quite
yet.
What about you, mark?
Have you have you brought?
You know, her over?
Speaker 1 (02:38):
I think we're gonna do a pool for the first time on
fourth of july, but we have apretty dirty lake by us.
There's an E coli meter on LakeErie every day.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
I don't even want to go in that water.
Dude, I don't know, man, I usedto love swimming in lakes as a
kid, but now I will not swim ina lake.
I don't know if you guys arethe same, but it doesn't have
the same appeal.
Speaker 3 (03:01):
That seaweed is intense when it wraps around
your ankles.
Oh so gross In the fresh water.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
Well, now you always hear about the people getting
like those brain amoebas thatare like eating their brains
from the outside too, and it'slike I didn't worry about that
when I was a kid man.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
Well, bfg, I just got to say Ed, whatever we're
calling you here, you're anexcellent father.
I don't think you should beworrying about that.
First of all, I've seen a lotof your posts and a lot of stuff
you do with, obviously, withyour boy and your wife, and
anybody would kill to have a dadlike you, and I know you said
he's not, like, the biggest fanof travel.
So it makes sense, man, he'llget there, you know, and that'll
(03:35):
be another thing to check offthe list when it comes.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
Dude, it's like I appreciate it first off, but
like you know, it's.
I was just thinking this theother day because I talked to my
mom and I was like mom, justcome out here, like I'll pay for
your, we'll pay for yourflights and get you and you know
, her husband and everybody.
And she's like I hate going upthere.
She's like I'm scared ofdriving up because, like so I'm
like three hours from the majorairport and you have to go all
like no matter how you get intomy place, you're going up like
(04:00):
canyons and you know, windingswitchback roads.
Long story short, dude, likeeveryone in my family hates
traveling, so we're all likestuck in all different places in
the country and no one wants togo visit and we can't bribe
each other to do it because it'slike you know, I just want to
pay for people to come see me.
It's so much easier than likebringing a kid and stuff.
You know, if you're offering tofly people out there.
Speaker 3 (04:26):
I think we've got a list of friends that want to
come visit that dude?
Speaker 2 (04:28):
okay done, we'll talk about it for sure.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
Happy to, happy to man it does have to limit your
travel like desire, being threehours from an airport, though
dude, and like it does.
Speaker 2 (04:37):
That's not even the worst part, though I just I just
get stressed.
Man, like I don't like the actof traveling.
I hate the act of traveling.
I don't mind when I'm there'tlike the act of traveling.
I hate the act of traveling, Idon't mind when I'm there, but
like the act of traveling itselfis like a nightmare to me, dude
.
Like I just am, like on edge.
I've tried everything.
I've tried, like you know, likeXanax or whatever you take on
the flights, no-transcript,isn't that the idea?
(05:13):
Like shouldn't everyone want tolove to be where they're at?
Speaker 3 (05:16):
Like that's the goal.
You know you saying that I wasthinking to you today, ed um, I
was reading a book and I'mpositive.
Speaker 2 (05:28):
You've read it.
It's like the boy, the mole,the fox and the horse.
Have you read that book?
See, let me just really quickly.
I know I am an english teacherand all, but like I don't read,
dude, there's like I read thebooks that I read in high school
.
I read the books that I read inhigh school now for my kids and
I don't like my reading is liketwitter or warpcast and stuff.
You know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
I use the word I use the term book loosely it's
mostly pictures.
It's just, it's hard to explain, man, it's just, it's like a I
don't know introspective,philosophical 10 minute read and
mostly pictures.
You know, it makes me want toread it to my kid.
My cousin actually shared withme over vacation and you know, I
(06:07):
think one of the points in thebook is like we're all just
trying to get home, likewhatever that is or whatever
that means to you.
So that it struck a chord, youknow, especially hearing you say
that the idea is that you loveyour home and it's a place of
peace and comfort and happiness,and uh, yeah, so of course.
But then then again, you wouldalso like to go to the beach and
you'd like to go to Vegas andyou would like to go to the
Grand.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Canyon.
I don't want to go anywhereever, but like, once again, it's
like I have to do it for my kid, like I have to go places so
that my kid has thoseexperiences, but, like for me, I
legitimately never need to goanywhere ever again never need
to go anywhere ever again fornow.
Speaker 1 (06:46):
That's why you're a good dad, though, because we
struggle with this with onefamily member that never
traveled at all, and so nowthey're later in life and
they're so nervous to doanything.
They don't ever want to leavetheir home, really, because it
just makes them nervous andthat's like.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
This is like slowly what I'm morphing into dude I'm
about to like the butt.
Bushes are getting likeovergrown in my house.
I'm becoming like the hermitdude.
Every neighborhood had like thehermit the dude.
Like oh man, don't, I don'tknow, we don't see that guy.
Did you ever see like the burbswith Tom Hanks and stuff, like
with the neighbors that areexactly dude?
Speaker 3 (07:19):
That'll be me man.
Speaker 1 (07:20):
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (07:22):
I used to deliver groceries for, like this
high-end grocery store out in Iguess it's like Playa del Mar.
It was basically like Veniceright, it's south of Santa
Monica when I was living in LAand I swear, like every house it
was hermits, People that justdon't want to leave.
They're the ones that areordering the high-end groceries
and then they crack the door andthey slide the dollar bill
(07:43):
through the crack.
I leave it on the porch.
Don't look at my stuff.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
Dude, ever since, like no contact delivery became
a thing, it's been the greatestthing in the world.
Like I love not engaging withpeople at all, but at the same
time, like You're so outgoingthat doesn't make any sense.
Well, see, that's the thing is.
Like I get all my socializationnormally at school, like with
(08:08):
the, with the kids, you know.
Like I'm literally in a classand Mark knows how this goes.
Like I'm, you know, with thesekids all day, eight hours a day,
forcing them to reply for you,forcing them to reply for me,
typing, working, you know, butlike, but you know what I mean.
Like and we're just andliterally like the type of
teacher I am in person, like Ijust talked to them about.
Like store, I'm like, ah, dude,what'd you do this weekend, you
know.
And so, like, by the end of theday, I'm like, please, no one
(08:31):
speak to me, I just need to.
Yeah, you're dating yourselfwith that one spit man.
Speaker 1 (08:39):
Sorry, sorry, rewind.
My wife and I would say likewhen we have a day full of
patients and, like you know,you're in the hospital too, and
staff and everything, likethere's so many small
interactions just of small talk.
You know you have 50, 60interactions of small talk
throughout the day, like I'mjust mentally drained from that
and want to do nothing at night.
Just the two of us will just gohave a drink and relax.
It's a lot.
Speaker 2 (09:00):
Is it?
Is it like I mean it's verydifferent but similar?
Is it like I mean it's verydifferent but similar, same,
same but different?
Spit Like when you guys havelike performances and stuff like
are you, when these are doneregardless of like, are you just
like drained, don't want totalk to anybody?
Speaker 3 (09:14):
Are you guys all amped up or like yeah, I think
there's a, there's a process ofcoming down from something like
that.
It's funny, when you said, youknow you can't travel, I'm
wondering, like, could you be ina band Like you literally never
stop traveling, it's all you doall day long, and especially
for us.
You know we weren't.
You know we did fairly well forourselves and we were really
(09:35):
lucky and I'm very, you know,happy.
We did what we did and the waywe did it.
But we weren't one of thosebands in a bus with a driver.
You know we were drivingourselves.
Um, you know, for the good partof a decade, you know my father
was our tour manager, uh, so hecame with us and uh, him and I
basically shared the drivingwith our drummers just the three
of us out of like eight or ninepeople that we trusted enough
to drive, you know.
(09:56):
Um, so there is a process, butnormally we were leaving the
club pretty much right awaybecause we had to drive to get
to the next club.
Uh, bands with a driver.
They're sticking around andthen when they they get back to
the bus at four or five am, thedriver takes over, drives them
to the next town.
Uh, for us it's like get packedup as fast as you can and get
out of there.
So as much as like for me, I'msuper extroverted and I would
(10:16):
love to stick around and signevery autograph and meet
everyone.
It was kind of out of necessitythat we just get in the truck
and once you get in the, uh, inthe rv, you know, man, we had
some weird stuff.
I mean, we listened, you knowwe would be chill, we had the
lights on and we'd get our, ourcereal out and we'd start
watching the friends box set orwhatever.
You know, we just just uh,relaxing.
(10:37):
Basically, we were big relaxersoutside of playing the show,
even though we're all likepretty extroverted.
It was like all you can do justto get recharged for the next
night when you're doing, youknow, 300 shows a year.
That's crazy.
Speaker 2 (10:50):
That's crazy, have you ever seen the movie Green
Room?
No.
Speaker 3 (10:56):
I don't know why.
I mean, it sounds familiar, butprobably just because it's two
common words jammed together.
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (11:00):
I don't think so it's got oh my gosh, who's the bald
guy from X-Men in the wheelchair?
Professor X, yeah, that actor,kingsley Ben Kingsley, is that
it?
Speaker 3 (11:13):
I don't know it's, got him it's got like Anton
Yelchin.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
it's about this punk band that goes on a tour to you
know like they're.
They're they're trying to getgas money, like they're just
going from gig to gig, dude,like trying to make it whatever.
And they end up getting bookedat this place and they get there
and they realize it's like this, like this white supremacist
gig that they're doing thatthey're doing right and like it
(11:41):
gets.
Speaker 3 (11:42):
Yeah, it's an amazing movie, dude.
Oh, did you see that's?
Speaker 2 (11:44):
why I wanted to bring it up was that was that in new
jersey?
Dude, dude you have.
You have to look this up, dude.
The movie is like one of myfavorite horror movies it's.
It's amazing, like you guyswould really like it, I think.
Speaker 3 (11:52):
But okay, it's a horror movie.
Oh cool yeah.
Oh yeah, oh yeah, dude it getscrazy.
Like, sounds, like, like soundslike a reality TV.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
Dude, it might give you PTSD then because, like you
know, I looked at reading thereviews and stuff, or like
people's comments, and I've seenlike one or two people be like
you know I used to.
You know this reminds me oflike touring with my friends and
like it's creepy.
Anyway, check it out.
Speaker 3 (12:16):
I'd like to pick your brain on it some other time
when you you know it god, Ithink it might have been us um,
because we, one of the firstshows we played when we were 14,
you know we got signed prettyyoung.
It was always a dream of oursand we, you know, we were all
pretty hard workers and, um, wekind of made it happen.
Uh, we left a lot of things,let a lot of things go.
I played baseball, golf in highschool.
(12:37):
Our singer was like thequarterback for the varsity team
when he was a junior.
You know like we were, or Idon't know sophomore sorry, but
we were.
We were all like we had a lotof things going, but we we
wanted to make the music thinghappen.
So we left a lot of thingsbehind.
But when we did that, you knowwe got signed pretty quickly and
one of the first shows we gotbefore we ever got a major label
(12:58):
deal, we were playing in in thebaltimore city.
Here there's a, there's a venueconnected to the building where
the, the courthouse is inbaltimore city, which is kind of
odd because it's like askinhead bar.
Apparently we we didn't knowthat, you know we're 14, but
there was a band called messedand I forget where they're from.
I want to say they're westcoast, but it's like a, like a
punk band punk, but they werelike gutter punks and you know
(13:19):
we opened for them.
We had to leave, basicallybecause we were underage and
it's like you know, you had tobe a drinking age to get in
there.
We're kind of standing outside,we're watching the show.
We're like sitting by the door.
They let us kind of hang out.
And midway through MEST show,somebody threw a beer at stage
(13:44):
and it hit the guitar player.
So he immediately, like,without we didn't even blink he
walks off the stage with hisguitar and just starts beating
the living shit out of him.
Like right, you know, it's noteven really a stage.
Like the stage is the sameheight as the floor, it's just,
you know, dive.
And so we're like, oh shit.
We're like, wow, man, this islike one of our first shows.
We're like this is just how itis, like this is gonna be like
this every night.
This is crazy.
And we're like.
And so we're like we help them.
I don't know.
It's like well, we're 14, maybenot.
Um, so anyway, they get back onstage, they start playing, the
bar kicks the three or four guysthat were together out.
(14:05):
Well, we're at, we know we'rekind of outside.
They're finishing up the showand here comes this truck around
the corner.
Big truck raised up swampers,you know some, probably skinhead
flags off the back.
There's like 10 guys jump outof this thing, molotov cocktails
like baseball bats.
They just start beating theshit out of their tour bus, bust
every window out of it,slashing the tires, and we're
like holy shit man this is it.
(14:27):
We made it really yeah, likefuck, this is gonna be.
This is so cool, like our firstnight.
It's always gonna be like thisamazing.
But, um, you know, our, our,our singer's dad is our manager,
my dad was was our tour manager.
They like grab us, like get thehell in the car.
We're going home.
No, we got to help them.
No, you're not.
Yeah, yeah, babies, get in thedamn car.
But it was like that man,there's skinheads everywhere.
(14:48):
We got put on all these tourslike hardcore punk scene tours,
and we were you know the thingsadolescent kids want to do Like
we.
We had no ax to grind, we hadgood lives, we were just trying
to have fun, and so Do you think?
Speaker 2 (15:04):
that's.
Do you think that's like asorry to cut you off, but like,
is that like specific, more toto punk, probably Because
there's so many?
I okay, cause that's the placeand you don't really know the
locale per se and the clientele,and like for sure.
Speaker 3 (15:26):
But I think, as a band starting out like it
doesn't matter what genre youare like, you'll take whatever
show you can get.
And the tours we got you know,because we had, we were pop punk
.
We were pop, a band that waslike had pop punk.
They put us on punk tours withactual punk bands and everyone
hated us man.
So our first year was brutal.
We played to 300 people flickingus off the whole time, throwing
(15:49):
shit at us, cussing us out,yeah, but it made us tough.
We had to learn the hard wayright away and we were like,
well, shit, we still love it, wedon't care, we'll find our fans
eventually.
It's kind of what we just toldeach other and we kept going and
we did.
We had like a 10 year good, 10year run.
So, but it is those punk shows,man, like the, the northeast
corridor especially.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
it's brutal, absolutely it's so cool, dude,
and and I, for people who don'tknow, you know, his original
band or his band that he's in iswakefield, um, and I bring it
up just cause like it'sinteresting to me and I
mentioned this before we had torestart it but, like you know,
when I was in high school,graduated 2005,.
We're all around similar ages,I think somewhat, and you know I
(16:30):
used to love like Taking BackSunday, the Starting Line, like
all these kinds of bandsespecially.
A lot of them came up locallytoo, you know, northeast of, of
course, and and I and I knew Iknew of your band, which was
just so cool to me to randomlyrun into you on Farcaster and
then a discord and becomefriends, that, like you know, a
band that I, that I would havelike done anything to, like meet
(16:50):
or hang out with you know as akid and stuff.
Speaker 3 (16:55):
Getting to meet later in life is just, it's just
awesome.
Speaker 2 (16:56):
It's kind of cool.
How like hey, for real, thoughyou know, it's just awesome.
It's kind of cool how like hey,for real, though you know, it's
like uh, it's weird how time islike a flat circle with so many
in so many ways, you know.
Speaker 3 (17:03):
It is, and it's such a small world man Like I feel
like a lot of you guys that I'vemet through um, through crypto,
really it's.
You know, we've all some of thesame interests, been to some of
the same bars or shows, or youknow venues, or it's just it's
cool how you can meet people, um, that you could become friends
with instantly.
Um, you know, like you weresaying today I think you made a
(17:23):
post about there's like ahandful of people you know, or
more that you would send 10grand to right now that you've
never met before in real life.
Just because you trust them,because you know them on that
level.
And that's been the coolestthing to me about being, uh, in
crypto, you know, besides theall the other reasons you come
here is just like it's so coolto meet people with those niche
interests that you reallyconnect with and it's like you
(17:45):
feel like you've known them yourwhole life and you trust them
more than a couple of yourbuddies you're gonna see, you
know, next weekend down at thebar.
Speaker 1 (17:51):
So yeah, especially after just a few weeks on
farcaster.
You're like well, this is goodenough, like we have some, that
was exciting oh well, mark,especially, it's so cool to get
to see you.
Speaker 3 (18:03):
Obviously, this is a podcast, but we're on video.
I mean like meeting you sort ofthis is it's cool Cause we've
been talking, you know, beingnew dads around the about the
same time, um, and then justsort of being able to share a
little bits of that journey,here and there as we've we've
been going, has been really cool.
Um, even super kind to me andum, you know, hopefully I've
reciprocated.
But it's been neat and hopefullywe can continue to do it, cause
(18:24):
it's it's such a cool thing.
And, to you know, I don't havemany most of my friends, their
kids are much older and havegrown up and they've moved on.
So, like I'm experiencing thesethings, I feel like sort of by
myself in real life with my, myreal life friends.
So it's cool to have otherpeople that you really trust and
you, you know, you appreciatewhat they have to say, uh, going
through it at the same time.
(18:45):
So, thank you Could you?
Speaker 1 (18:46):
yeah, could you imagine like we're both around
the same age later in life kids,like if we had to go to, like
dad support groups and, like youknow, hang out with like 23
year olds about, you know,raising?
A kid and their, their,problems, like it's been perfect
to have this scenario.
There's even a couple otherguys in there having having
babies right around the sametime.
It's kind of wild dude.
Speaker 2 (19:04):
There's a lot, I would say like four or five of
you guys.
They literally just had a babywithin the past like two months,
which is awesome, dude, and itcouldn't be like a better group
of people too.
Like, if there's anyone I wantto be procreating, it's the
people in Discord that I likeand that I would send money to
that I don't really know.
That's the people I want.
But, to your point though, it'sbeen so true, dude, and it's
(19:26):
awesome that, just like theInternet in general, I feel like
it's so cool to be able to makefriends of shared common
interests versus friends ofproximity, which is the only
thing we had before the internetand stuff, you know, and and
not always the the friends ofproximity aren't always the
friends that you know you wouldhave made if, if you had a
choice.
You know what I mean.
So, um, meeting you guys hasbeen awesome and and like Mark
(19:49):
and I and Craig and stuff, andwe we've only actually we
thought about this their day.
It's been like is it two yearsnow or something, which is like
like gross, but it feels likeseven lifetimes in crypto.
Speaker 3 (19:59):
Yeah dude?
Speaker 2 (20:01):
oh my gosh, I know.
Yeah, man, it's awesome though,dude and like and I was just
thinking today too like we needto probably reach out to a
couple more friends.
If we know anybody like we have, you know anybody spit or mark
that we can bring in like goodpeople, you know, just to keep
the vibe going it's been so easyto do that with farcaster, like
(20:22):
just it's so positive, right.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
It's feel like it is like before farcaster and then
afterwards.
It's just two differenttimelines, like of meeting
friends, because you're goingthere and you bought in a group
of like 20 people within weeksand look how many people are
still sticking around gettingalong like it's I don't know.
Speaker 3 (20:39):
It's been incredible yeah, I do have a question for
spit yeah, I don't know whatit's like, was it?
Speaker 1 (20:46):
did you really enjoy like traveling with your dad all
the time in the in the band asa manager?
Well, is it a good thing, a badthing, like?
Speaker 2 (20:53):
especially that mean right
Speaker 3 (20:58):
I mean, um, you know, like I said, we we got signed.
Basically, we, we started theband.
We were like 13, 14, we saidwe're gonna get signed within a
year.
Um, I'm sure a lot of you youknow, you guys know the band
good, charlotte, but we grew upwith them.
They practiced in my garage.
Um, their drummer was oursinger's brother, so we were
very close with them.
(21:18):
We played a lot of gigs withthem.
Uh, we saw them get signed andwe practiced next to them and
we're like these guys suck dude,like we watch them every day,
like they're terrible musicians.
They don't even write their ownsongs.
They just, you know, they stealother people's songs and change
the melody and like we can dothat.
So it gave us a lot ofconfidence seeing them do that.
And you know, for saying that,like they are some of the
(21:41):
smartest, savviest businessmenI've ever met.
Benji and Joel, the twins, Imean they would use their own
mother to get where they neededto go and they did that to a lot
of people.
But there's some lessons inthere.
You know, their father kind ofleft them for dead and they
didn't have anyone else.
Man, they had to like bondtogether and they did and it was
a strong bond and they weresuper, super smart and savvy
(22:02):
about the way they went aboutbeing artists.
But for us, you know, it wasjust.
We came at it from a little bitdifferent angle, like it wasn't
a necessity.
You know, it was just somethingwe really wanted to do and you
know, from there it's likeeverything else is a cherry on
top.
Yeah, having my dad around wasawesome.
I love my dad.
My dad was my boss from the dayI can remember he builds custom
(22:24):
homes.
I used to work for him.
We had a really close bond.
He was the coach of my baseballteam, coach of my soccer team.
We did everything together.
I was very lucky in that regard,because being on tour is not
easy.
Man.
The way the contracts arewritten, you're not guaranteed
anything, even if it says we'regoing to pay you 20% of the door
(22:45):
, 50% of the door, 15% of merch,whatever your contract says.
Then you got to actually getthe money.
The first part's easy.
The second part is difficult,especially if not a lot of
people show up or if it's a downseason or whatever the hell the
case may be bad weather nobodywants to pay you, especially
your little snot-nosed kid likeget the hell out of my face.
Yeah, so having your fatherthere to be like well, actually,
(23:07):
that's true, you're gonna payus, I'm gonna whip your ass was
actually pretty nice and, andyou know, he was the first one
to get us drugs in the new city.
He's the first one to makefriends and find girls to send
back to the rv, like that's myboy man, my dad's the best man,
my wedding we're super close, sofor most people that probably
sounds like a nightmare scenario.
For me, it was ideal, absolutelyideal.
Speaker 2 (23:28):
That's exciting did you ever like so just talking,
you know what you mentioned withthe other band and everything
like did you guys, um, inwakefield, ever sit down and
like, have and make like aconscious decision to be like
we're going to do it, what wethink of in the right way, like
was that important to you guys?
If that makes sense at all?
Speaker 3 (23:49):
I think in so as much as we are going to do as much
as we possibly can and work ashard as we possibly can to to
get as far as we can.
We knew we weren't particularlymusically gifted, like you know
, especially back then.
You know this is before theinternet when we first started.
So you know, you hear all thesebands and there's a lot of
(24:12):
great bands and maybe, if youknow, one of the great things
about social media is you canconnect with your fans.
You can find people and it'smuch easier now with the way the
technology has evolved.
You don't need a big studio.
You can record a record in yourhouse and it can sound great
for, like you know, a smallfraction of what it used to cost
.
But another part of that islike you're exposed to all these
insane musicians.
(24:33):
Like I could pull up Instagramright now and find 10 better
guitar players than fuckingYngwie Malmsteen or you know who
you name it.
You name your favorite guitarplayer.
There's people right now thatno one's ever heard of.
Like you just open your app andlike they're amazing.
I probably would have gottendiscouraged, to be honest, but
we didn't know any better.
You know, the only thing weknew was these guys that got
signed in my garage and theyweren't very good.
(24:54):
You know I love them to death.
But uh, you know I think it wasmore naivete and just thinking
like.
But we knew my father owned hisown business, our singer's dad
owned his own business.
We saw, hard work can actuallyget you as far as you want to go
anywhere, no matter what you'redoing, if you put your mind to
(25:14):
it and you're willing tosacrifice.
And that's what we did.
We practiced eight, ten hours aday.
We choreographed everything.
We put football helmets on, wego in the yard, throw our
guitars back and forth in theair.
Like our whole show, down tothe every second, was
choreographed.
And we knew it like the back ofour hand.
We could do it with our eyesclosed and that's how we got
signed is like, not necessarilythe music, I mean it's okay, but
(25:36):
we put on a show that, like,you would want to go see.
And when, when record execscame out to see that they're
like man, this is a cool, coolshow, like we could probably do
something with these guys.
So it was more about.
You know, when you say theright way, like musically, what
does that mean Purist probablymeans something different to us
as sons of made men.
That's what it meant to us waslike you work your ass off to
(25:57):
get it.
Speaker 2 (26:01):
Yeah, I only brought it up because I've recently been
watching this show on Netflix.
I don't know if you guys everheard of it, called Outlast.
If you've ever watched Alonethose kind of survival shows,
it's along the same vein.
But when I first heard it on Iwas like, ah, I'm just kind of
bored, I'll put it on in thebackground.
And all of a sudden, an episodelater, I found myself glued to
the TV because it's a survivalshow but there's like four teams
(26:25):
, you know, and it just devolvedinto like a total like war
between, like certain peoplewere like we're here to win the
right way, like I'd rather justgo home than do what they're
doing.
And then other people were likestealing people's sleeping bags
and like it's like sub-zerotemperature and they're like
plotting and like burning thingdude, they're like we'll burn
the whole camp down, yeah.
(26:45):
So like I don't know.
It's just made me really kindof think of things lately
because as I'm watching that,like the two people who were, it
was like these two women I waslike I hate these people, dude,
Like these are the worst people,and it just kind of made me
appreciate the people that areout there trying to you know,
take it, I guess doing, taking alittle harder path, but doing
things you know in the way thatthey think is right.
(27:07):
At least you know.
Speaker 3 (27:13):
Yeah, I think if you have the artistic capability,
then that's maybe a strugglethat you have to have with
yourself when you know, whenyou're you know, three 14 year
old kids, man, like that wasn'teven a thought in our mind it
was just like let's work as hardas we can.
But, you know, good artistsborrow, great artists steal
right, like that's every great,successful artist that I've
really met.
For the most part and it's nottrue for everyone they've had
(27:34):
some form of that.
You know, whatever it is, youknow God, the business is just
scummy man, like I don't reallyknow how else to put it, and
maybe not now that you can kindof do it on your own on the
Internet, but back then it'slike we were part of a dying
industry and we saw the cometcoming, you know, and we're
standing there with's weird.
(28:02):
I kind of wish we had come alittle bit later, and you know,
if that makes any sense, like Ithink, with with what we had,
like the tools became much morewidely available to just do your
stuff at home, how you want tospend the time.
Studio time back then wasexpensive, man.
We we were, you know, luckyenough, thank God.
You know, I don't know it's adouble-edged sword, because I'm
(28:27):
so happy that we got to playmusic in some of these hallowed
venues and these hallowed spaces, these studios that don't exist
anymore because they couldn'tpay their rent.
They were selling theirmicrophones, like, while we're
there, we were watching ithappen, like cello, like we
stood in the room.
You know we're like RageAgainst the Machine recorded
their first album, and like theChili Peppers and Weezer.
And like you're standing therelike Rivers played ping pong
right here, like this is prettycool and the sounds of those
(28:48):
rooms like you'll just never getthem again.
So we are losing that and I'mhappy to be a part of that.
But, that being said, like thatwasn't going to help us a whole
lot.
You know for what we did.
So you put it.
You know I've always toldpeople this like they ask, you
know, if they ask about guitars,like is it the type of guitar?
(29:09):
Like is it the expensive guitarthat makes you sound good?
Is it the expensive amp, theboutique tubes?
You know all this stuff andit's like really no man, if you
get a good musician and givethem a kid's toy, like they'll
figure out how to make it soundawesome.
They got something to say andpeople are going to want to hear
it, regardless of what they'replaying it on.
So like that kind of translatesto where we are now with the
music industry Like you don'tneed all these people like
(29:30):
sucking on you like a leechbecause they're providing you
the means to get that big musicvideo on that channel or
whatever.
You know you don't need thatanymore.
So I love that so much and youknow I don't have the energy
like I used to, so that sort ofpassed me a little bit.
Now I just kind of do what Iwant to do.
But you know, for a kidstarting out in the music
business man like this is such agreat time to be alive to be
(29:53):
doing that.
Speaker 1 (29:54):
Are you going to encourage your daughter to get
into the music business?
See what she likes to do.
Speaker 3 (29:56):
I already have her a guitar Hold on one second.
Speaker 1 (29:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (30:00):
That's sick dude, sick dude, cool man, that's
awesome.
It's awesome to talk to him,dude, about this stuff because,
like, like I said, I was, I wasa fan growing up, man, so it's
like wow to get like this.
I know just seeing you.
Yeah, dude, it's cool oh, andthere he is.
Oh nice, that's hers.
Speaker 3 (30:14):
That's a cool guitar dude so it's like a little mini
gibson made these only for acouple years.
Um, I forget what it's called,but it's a little mini flying v.
It's got a short scale neck sothe little kids can get their
hands around it.
So I'm super stoked to get herplaying this and get some videos
oh, that's cool.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
Uh, what age would you expect her to start playing?
Speaker 3 (30:31):
um, I'm gonna wake her up in a second start getting
her on her rudiments startgetting her on her scales.
Eat, you know, at least theminor blues.
By what?
Next week?
How old is she?
Speaker 1 (30:41):
two and a half months I mean she's already traveling
the world at this point, goingto different sporting events and
everything getting in the ocean.
Speaker 3 (30:48):
She's seasoned, so how about you guys?
How do you feel about this?
Cause it's something that Ithink about often is like you
hear the stories of the greatsman like Tiger Woods and and, uh
, you know so many, um, fathersare always hard asses that are
just like you're going to dothis, you're going to do it
right, or you're getting 12lashings, you know, till you hit
that note or whatever it is,and you see, like that can
(31:10):
produce greatness, but obviouslyat a cost.
Like a lot of these people arescrewed up mentally and like in
their social lives, right, Imean, what do you guys think
about that?
As far as, like, when it comesto your kid, like in the path
they may choose for their careeror any sort of outlet they may
have?
Speaker 1 (31:26):
I feel like they need to have the interest and the
desire themselves right.
If they don't, they're justgoing to shut down.
I coached baseball for all myfive younger brothers, and so I
coached them for like a decadealmost, and every year there
were kids dropping out who aregreat, because their dads would
just get on them.
They didn't enjoy the gameanymore and then they didn't
(31:46):
even want to play when it cameto high school and everybody
wondered why, like this eliteathlete is done and they just
didn't enjoy it.
I think, as long as the kidenjoys whatever they're doing
music, sports, like they maywant to get better at it, I
don't know.
Speaker 2 (32:00):
Yeah, and I'm in the same boat.
I mean, I just want to supportmy kid with whatever he wants to
do.
Me and my wife talked aboutthis stuff.
You know, obviously, when wewere first having a kid and one
of the first things was, like Ireally hope he doesn't want to
play football, dude, like I justdon't want him to play football
because, you know, because likethe brain stuff, I've had
(32:21):
concussions and and now I havemigraines and I think that's to
cross that bridge, luckilybecause he doesn't have an
interest.
But we were like, yeah, we'llsupport him.
And you know, hey, just reallyquickly, I know this is kind of
off, well, it's kind of offtopic, but like, weirdly enough,
dude, my uncle makes guitarsand has like made guitar.
He has like had like a factoryin Japan for the longest time
and I don't know I doubt youwould know I'm looking him up
(32:44):
right now to see him all,because he gave the one in the
back there.
Is that?
See, I'm not an expert Is thatlike a fender or something like
that?
Is that something different?
Speaker 3 (32:51):
That's like a guitar aficionado no-transcript.
Speaker 2 (33:09):
I'm just kind of interested to see if yeah.
Speaker 3 (33:10):
I'm getting your uncle's number.
So first you guys.
So what you're saying is you'reboth raising losers.
First of all, I'm going to gowake my daughter up and beat her
right after we finish this, getto work, tell right after we
finish this, get to work, tellher to start rosining up her bow
(33:31):
.
No, no, I agree 100.
I mean my, my dad was a hardass and I saw his father kind of
beat it into him and he didn'tdo that with me, thank god.
I mean he, he, he tried hisbest not to, let's put it that
way.
Um, sometimes you can't help it, but you know, that's all we
can hope.
Right is there?
I guess that they're happy andenjoying what they're doing.
But man, it's like how coolwould it be to raise like the
next?
You know, that's all we canhope, right Is there?
I guess that they're happy andenjoying what they're doing.
But man, it's like how coolwould it be to raise like the
(33:51):
next you know great athlete orgreat at something you know, and
like it takes, you know youhave to.
I don't know, I don't know.
That's that's love, right?
It comes out as as pain andsuffering, and I don't know.
Speaker 1 (34:06):
I had one.
I had one of my youngerbrothers he's like 10 years
younger than me wanted to bethat elite athlete and wanted to
like had that drive and wouldcome off the field and or after,
like he, you know got out andbe like, what was wrong with my
swing there?
How can I do better?
Or like, how could I havefielded that ball better?
And like, if you have a kidlike that, like you and your dad
you know.
And like, if you have a kidlike that, it like you, like you
and your dad, you know outtraveling.
(34:27):
If you have that relationship,it makes it better and it's more
enjoyable when they succeed, ifthey're truly wanting to like
get better themselves.
But I had another brother who,like wanted to stay home because
he got sunburned.
Right, you know you're notgonna like make that kid try to
be as best as he can be if theydon't want to.
Speaker 2 (34:42):
That's going to go the opposite direction see, with
my dad like, uh, you know his,his stepdad was like abusive and
stuff and like I I stillremember to this day even.
I still think there's a fisthole in the wall of my
grandmom's door, of her house,of her bedroom, and that was
there ever since I was a littlekid, like, and it was from his
(35:02):
stepdad, who I never met.
But my dad would tell me thatlike his stepdad would come in
drunk and then literally justpunch him in the back of the
head at the dinner table andlike so my dad was very much
like not like you know what Imean and very much like,
whatever you want to do, Isupport you and and never
pressured me for anything likethat, so, which I'm thankful for
is that your dad that we see inthe fishing uh pictures?
(35:26):
That's.
That is my wife's dad.
So, um, yeah, my, my, uhin-laws live in the same town as
us.
Uh, here my parent, my dad,lives in Philadelphia still, and
my mom's down in Florida andeverything so kind of split up,
but it's not as you guysprobably are.
You are you close to familyright now?
Spit Like you guys live nearclose to your family, or.
Speaker 3 (35:46):
Yeah, we're.
We're about an hour and a halffrom my family and Heather, my
wife, her family, is like fiveminutes away, so it's really
nice, you need one family close.
Speaker 2 (35:56):
Definitely need them.
Me and Mark talk about this.
I'm like I don't know howpeople live away from their
families.
And now, like, can you imagine?
Speaker 3 (36:05):
With a kid, it's impossible.
Speaker 2 (36:07):
Dude can you imagine being a single parent in a town
that's not like where yourfamily lives either.
Like, how do you even do this?
Like?
That doesn't even make sense tome.
It's crazy.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
You could never afford it.
It gives you a lot moreadmiration for the people who do
that.
Speaker 2 (36:21):
Oh, the hell out of their hair dude, so do you have.
Speaker 1 (36:25):
Are you over at your in-laws all the time, or do they
come to you?
Speaker 3 (36:29):
they come to us now, but we we've had to have the
talk this week.
You know my wife's going backfull-time now and she, um, she
runs, uh, health care practiceand it's actually like, uh, it's
a conglomerate.
They left the umbrella theywere under and they're starting
their own sort of group now withseveral ENTs around the area.
(36:50):
And basically the guy that theyhired to do this got fed up.
You know they wanted him tocook the dinner and they didn't
want him to buy the groceriesand for him, you know they were
paying him a lot of money but itwas like a pride thing and
basically my wife was just underhim and he's like, look, I'm
leaving, this is your gig now.
And she's like I'm having achild.
(37:11):
What do you mean?
So the day we got home from thehospital my wife went back to
work.
She's been working on thecomputer remote, she's been
trying to piecemeal this companyback together and basically
they're making her, you know,executor of operations, like
she's running a company now.
So it's, you know, she gotthrusted sort of into it.
(37:32):
It's a great opportunity.
She's super excited.
We are very thankful and she'sgood at what she does and it's
going to be perfect.
But in the meantime we have atwo month old and it's like I'm
on the road all day and ourin-laws are getting uh, you know
to an advanced age.
And so we're like, well, whatdo you do?
I don't even know what to.
So it's like, uh, obviouslythere's places that'll that'll
(37:52):
take your, your babies.
But it's like, do you reallywant to give your baby to a
stranger, you know?
It's like, so I'm at the pointwhere I might just be like, hey,
I'm going'd enjoy it.
I mean, that's the discussionwe're having.
So this weekend I think weactually have to make that
decision.
I can do real estate, which iswhat I do now pretty much from
(38:14):
home anyway.
So I think that'd be actuallypretty cool.
I can sit home and play withher.
So I'm looking forward to that.
I know you guys, I guess you'rekind of off right now, mark.
He guess you're kind of offright now, mark.
He says like you're off seasonso you're getting like summer
semester.
Speaker 1 (38:26):
Yeah, we're fortunate too that we took a year off
from seeing patients, so, uh,we're not having to see any
patients and it's summer, so wereally don't have that much work
.
So, and we both work remotelycurrently, so it's all the
everyday with the baby, which isnice.
But also now they're trying toget back into things like we've
created a Velcro baby and heliterally can't put her down for
(38:47):
anything, so somebody is alwaysholding her and the other
person is there taking a nap ortrying to work out, and then
we're putting work last.
So eventually we'll have tomove that up the ladder.
Speaker 3 (38:56):
You guys were talking about this in one of the past
episodes, about like and my wifesays this all the time being in
health care, like you knowwhat's what's cool about having
a wife in health care,especially with a newborn, is
like I don't ever have to thinkabout anything.
Yes, um, my opinions are notneeded.
That's true or wanted.
I just I say what do we do?
What do we do?
And she tells us and that'sgreat, that's amazing.
Speaker 2 (39:15):
Um gives me a lot of bandwidth for other things.
Speaker 3 (39:19):
But they were saying like you can't spoil a newborn,
right is the saying.
So it's like she crying.
Whatever she wants, just giveit to her.
Speaker 2 (39:24):
You know I'm like what is the cutoff like when?
Speaker 3 (39:27):
can we when do we start creating the?
Speaker 1 (39:28):
monster.
I ask my mom that, like everytime I see her, because she's
she works in a NICU and she saidthe same thing you can't spoil
a newborn yeah, it was your momright yeah, and like every day
like we feel like we're puttingourselves deeper in a hole but
at the same time, like we'reolder parents where it's gonna
be a one child, like why notgive all the love you can,
exactly.
Speaker 3 (39:48):
I don't really care.
I feel like that's somethingyou said, ed yeah, I heard you
talking about with your son.
Like why not, you know, oncethey're 18, like they're, they
don't want you anything to dowith you anymore.
Like why not, you know?
Speaker 2 (39:58):
dude, there's like, I mean, there's so many different
ways to parent, there's so manydifferent styles.
If there really was one methodthat worked, then we would all
know it.
Um, ultimately, I just feellike the best thing we can do is
just love your kid as much asyou can, dude, and then you hope
to god that they meet goodpeople and have good influences
elsewhere.
Um, I don't know, I don't everlike, is my kid spoiled like
(40:19):
absolutely dude?
Probably very much so, but Idon't know.
Speaker 1 (40:22):
I want him to have everything that he wants and
yeah, but you you have likealmost a weekly story of he's
spoiled with you and your wife,but he's not spoiled out in like
the general public, right?
He's nice to other people.
Yeah, he has friends like.
You're teaching him how to likebe, you know, interact well
with others, not just like aspoiled single child definitely
(40:43):
that's so true.
Speaker 3 (40:44):
It's like.
Speaker 2 (40:45):
It's like spoiling them with your attention yeah,
and like just different, just benice.
That's the only thing andthat's the what we tell him too,
being my wife.
We're like dude, we want you toget good grades sure, cool,
whatever.
We want you to do this ourselfcool, whatever.
But the most important thing isthat you're nice to other
people, because that's howyou're going to really get
places.
To be honest, you know whatwhat I mean, as you guys know
very well, I'm sure.
(41:05):
And um, you know, he like hecame back from camp and he got
like the kindest camper Dude.
We were like over the moon dude.
That's like.
And meanwhile, he's like I hateyou dad, like, oh, I get all
your money too long here, spit,I guess.
Mark, do you have any questionsor anything you want to ask him
(41:26):
before we?
Speaker 1 (41:27):
we let him let me and I could ask him questions for
hours, but I just want to saythank you for taking the time
here to join us.
You know it's been a long timecoming to actually meet you.
Speaker 3 (41:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (41:36):
Yeah, thank you very much, man.
Speaker 3 (41:37):
I feel like.
Speaker 2 (41:50):
I feel like you know somebody do you uh.
So this is something.
I would like to bring it backbecause I we used to do it, but
I guess we haven't in a while.
But spit, what are?
Uh, give me two of yourfavorite movies of all time.
And and why?
Dude like just off the top ofyour head if you can't really
think of it, because I know it'sputting you on the spot there.
But like, what are two thatcome to your mind, like I don't
mind being put on the spot.
Speaker 3 (42:06):
I'm not a big movie guy, like, admittedly, like I
don't know if I've never beendiagnosed with adhd, but like I
can't really sit still longenough for movies, um, which is
weird because I could sit at acomputer and record music all
day non-stop.
But I feel like there's a lotof like, there's some intricacy
to that and there's like a lotof little things that you're
doing and you're switching it upvery often.
(42:27):
But my favorite movie ever isHook.
It's not even close.
I've got a huge crush on Tink,obviously, like from the moment
I saw that movie.
So every movie she's been in,like God, my wife will you know
if it's on, but hey, you canleave it on this one, you know,
(42:51):
yeah, I'm always giving her shitfor like watching his old
movies.
I'm like, oh no, yeah, it'sperfect, uh.
But yeah, hook for sure is likemy favorite.
Um, god, I was.
I was a big fan of um it's.
I'm not gonna say anythingserious, I'm sure like you know,
is it serious movies that youlove?
Speaker 2 (43:01):
no, no, no, they're never serious.
Speaker 3 (43:02):
No, not, okay good because serious movies kind of
just bore the shit out of me.
Speaker 1 (43:06):
There's good ones and it's fine.
Speaker 3 (43:08):
But I'm like, I'm not into like the shot.
I don't give a fuck about theshot or whatever or like the
aspect ratio.
Speaker 1 (43:14):
Yeah, no, no, no, I don't like audience films.
It's fine.
Speaker 3 (43:17):
Yeah, it's fine, sure , and like the three ninjas too
dude ninjas kick back orwhatever strike back.
Which one was it dude?
Speaker 2 (43:27):
yes, yeah, dude, I used to love me my stepbrother.
Dude, I grew up with astepbrother.
We're no longer, don't you know?
Our parents divorced, but likewe used to watch those movies,
all three ninjas, and there wasa big 90s karate thing going on,
dude, like we love karate.
Speaker 3 (43:43):
Yes, love karate.
Speaker 2 (43:44):
Karate was everything though there was three ninjas
and there was like somethingelse that was.
Now I'm going to have to lookthis up.
It was very similar to it, butanyway, man, that's great Core
memory unlocked yeah.
Speaker 3 (43:54):
Thank you Well, thanks so much for doing this Um
the book that I was sayingearlier, but the One of the
pages that really stuck with meand I was going to share it with
you earlier.
But it's like the mole askedthe boy, what do you want to be
when you grow up?
And the boy says kind, and Ithought it was pretty profound.
Not many people think of thatas a destination or, as I don't
(44:17):
know, an outcome, but that iswhat else could you want to be,
especially for your children oryourself.
So you saying that earlier justreally made me think of that.
I had to pull it back up.
Certainly appreciate you guyshaving me on.
It's a lot of fun, that'sawesome, yeah.
Welcome to another episode of Odds and Ends.
Here we're here with Mark BFGand our good friend
Spitfunkolips, who we metoriginally on Farcaster a few
months back I guess it's morelike five months ago now or so,
since I think I joined aroundFebruary.
But we've gotten to know SpitFunko you know pretty well over
this past few months.
Just an awesome dude, reallyfunny guy, now new dad and
(00:34):
everything, so doing thatjourney.
Awesome musician who is amember of a band that I used to
actually listen to growing up,which is kind of weird because,
you know, obviously I didn'tknow him at all.
So it's kind of cool to youknow everything go full circle
there.
But how's it going, spitt?
How are you today, man?
Speaker 3 (00:50):
I'm great gentlemen.
Thanks for having me Pleasureto be on board.
I'm a big fan of the show.
Speaker 1 (00:56):
We're excited to have you especially coming right off
of vacation.
I mean you made a special triphome for this.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
I did.
We were going to stay.
You know we're supposed to bein the Outer Banks.
Still, I told my wife.
I looked my wife dead in theeye and said babe, we got a
podcast, we're going to have topack it up.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
Yes, I wasn't sure if you were joking for a second
dude.
Speaker 3 (01:12):
Yeah, I was like man.
I hope you didn't call it earlyfor this dude, you know it's
actually even fun needed to getto, so I mean as far as the
totem pole goes, not, you know,the uh, the odds and ends is
right there with uh right yeah,you know, I mean if john jett
wasn't opening probably be above, but yeah fair, true, fair.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
When are you guys going to that?
Speaker 3 (01:36):
dude.
So we went saturday night.
We, uh, my daughter a lot offirsts, um, obviously a new dad,
um, as well as mark and mydaughter first time putting her
feet in the sand over the pastweek, first time being in the
ocean, first time being in apool and her first rock and roll
concert.
Speaker 1 (01:52):
So a lot of firsts.
That's awesome.
Dude, How'd she do going in thewater?
Speaker 3 (01:57):
She did great.
You know she loves the waterSince the day we brought her
home baths um spitting up overherself peeing on everything she
loves liquids.
So that's very well.
Speaker 2 (02:08):
Dude, good, good for you, though we me and my wife,
you know, we really we stillhaven't gotten to take our kid
to to the ocean.
And that's like I can't believeit, you know, and he's eight
and all, and I feel bad that,but we just it's something we
need to to this summer to go flydown to florida.
But just a lot of stuff came up.
My mom's or my, my wife's, uh,you know, grandmother passed
away and all and kind of threwthings into turmoil.
(02:29):
But like man, I know, I feellike I'm letting my kid down
here as a parent, not notbringing him to the ocean quite
yet.
What about you, mark?
Have you have you brought?
You know, her over?
Speaker 1 (02:38):
I think we're gonna do a pool for the first time on
fourth of july, but we have apretty dirty lake by us.
There's an E coli meter on LakeErie every day.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
I don't even want to go in that water.
Dude, I don't know, man, I usedto love swimming in lakes as a
kid, but now I will not swim ina lake.
I don't know if you guys arethe same, but it doesn't have
the same appeal.
Speaker 3 (03:01):
That seaweed is intense when it wraps around
your ankles.
Oh so gross In the fresh water.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
Well, now you always hear about the people getting
like those brain amoebas thatare like eating their brains
from the outside too, and it'slike I didn't worry about that
when I was a kid man.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
Well, bfg, I just got to say Ed, whatever we're
calling you here, you're anexcellent father.
I don't think you should beworrying about that.
First of all, I've seen a lotof your posts and a lot of stuff
you do with, obviously, withyour boy and your wife, and
anybody would kill to have a dadlike you, and I know you said
he's not, like, the biggest fanof travel.
So it makes sense, man, he'llget there, you know, and that'll
(03:35):
be another thing to check offthe list when it comes.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
Dude, it's like I appreciate it first off, but
like you know, it's.
I was just thinking this theother day because I talked to my
mom and I was like mom, justcome out here, like I'll pay for
your, we'll pay for yourflights and get you and you know
, her husband and everybody.
And she's like I hate going upthere.
She's like I'm scared ofdriving up because, like so I'm
like three hours from the majorairport and you have to go all
like no matter how you get intomy place, you're going up like
(04:00):
canyons and you know, windingswitchback roads.
Long story short, dude, likeeveryone in my family hates
traveling, so we're all likestuck in all different places in
the country and no one wants togo visit and we can't bribe
each other to do it because it'slike you know, I just want to
pay for people to come see me.
It's so much easier than likebringing a kid and stuff.
You know, if you're offering tofly people out there.
Speaker 3 (04:26):
I think we've got a list of friends that want to
come visit that dude?
Speaker 2 (04:28):
okay done, we'll talk about it for sure.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
Happy to, happy to man it does have to limit your
travel like desire, being threehours from an airport, though
dude, and like it does.
Speaker 2 (04:37):
That's not even the worst part, though I just I just
get stressed.
Man, like I don't like the actof traveling.
I hate the act of traveling.
I don't mind when I'm there'tlike the act of traveling.
I hate the act of traveling, Idon't mind when I'm there, but
like the act of traveling itselfis like a nightmare to me, dude
.
Like I just am, like on edge.
I've tried everything.
I've tried, like you know, likeXanax or whatever you take on
the flights, no-transcript,isn't that the idea?
(05:13):
Like shouldn't everyone want tolove to be where they're at?
Speaker 3 (05:16):
Like that's the goal.
You know you saying that I wasthinking to you today, ed um, I
was reading a book and I'mpositive.
Speaker 2 (05:28):
You've read it.
It's like the boy, the mole,the fox and the horse.
Have you read that book?
See, let me just really quickly.
I know I am an english teacherand all, but like I don't read,
dude, there's like I read thebooks that I read in high school
.
I read the books that I read inhigh school now for my kids and
I don't like my reading is liketwitter or warpcast and stuff.
You know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
I use the word I use the term book loosely it's
mostly pictures.
It's just, it's hard to explain, man, it's just, it's like a I
don't know introspective,philosophical 10 minute read and
mostly pictures.
You know, it makes me want toread it to my kid.
My cousin actually shared withme over vacation and you know, I
(06:07):
think one of the points in thebook is like we're all just
trying to get home, likewhatever that is or whatever
that means to you.
So that it struck a chord, youknow, especially hearing you say
that the idea is that you loveyour home and it's a place of
peace and comfort and happiness,and uh, yeah, so of course.
But then then again, you wouldalso like to go to the beach and
you'd like to go to Vegas andyou would like to go to the
Grand.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Canyon.
I don't want to go anywhereever, but like, once again, it's
like I have to do it for my kid, like I have to go places so
that my kid has thoseexperiences, but, like for me, I
legitimately never need to goanywhere ever again never need
to go anywhere ever again fornow.
Speaker 1 (06:46):
That's why you're a good dad, though, because we
struggle with this with onefamily member that never
traveled at all, and so nowthey're later in life and
they're so nervous to doanything.
They don't ever want to leavetheir home, really, because it
just makes them nervous andthat's like.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
This is like slowly what I'm morphing into dude I'm
about to like the butt.
Bushes are getting likeovergrown in my house.
I'm becoming like the hermitdude.
Every neighborhood had like thehermit the dude.
Like oh man, don't, I don'tknow, we don't see that guy.
Did you ever see like the burbswith Tom Hanks and stuff, like
with the neighbors that areexactly dude?
Speaker 3 (07:19):
That'll be me man.
Speaker 1 (07:20):
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (07:22):
I used to deliver groceries for, like this
high-end grocery store out in Iguess it's like Playa del Mar.
It was basically like Veniceright, it's south of Santa
Monica when I was living in LAand I swear, like every house it
was hermits, People that justdon't want to leave.
They're the ones that areordering the high-end groceries
and then they crack the door andthey slide the dollar bill
(07:43):
through the crack.
I leave it on the porch.
Don't look at my stuff.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
Dude, ever since, like no contact delivery became
a thing, it's been the greatestthing in the world.
Like I love not engaging withpeople at all, but at the same
time, like You're so outgoingthat doesn't make any sense.
Well, see, that's the thing is.
Like I get all my socializationnormally at school, like with
(08:08):
the, with the kids, you know.
Like I'm literally in a classand Mark knows how this goes.
Like I'm, you know, with thesekids all day, eight hours a day,
forcing them to reply for you,forcing them to reply for me,
typing, working, you know, butlike, but you know what I mean.
Like and we're just andliterally like the type of
teacher I am in person, like Ijust talked to them about.
Like store, I'm like, ah, dude,what'd you do this weekend, you
know.
And so, like, by the end of theday, I'm like, please, no one
(08:31):
speak to me, I just need to.
Yeah, you're dating yourselfwith that one spit man.
Speaker 1 (08:39):
Sorry, sorry, rewind.
My wife and I would say likewhen we have a day full of
patients and, like you know,you're in the hospital too, and
staff and everything, likethere's so many small
interactions just of small talk.
You know you have 50, 60interactions of small talk
throughout the day, like I'mjust mentally drained from that
and want to do nothing at night.
Just the two of us will just gohave a drink and relax.
It's a lot.
Speaker 2 (09:00):
Is it?
Is it like I mean it's verydifferent but similar?
Is it like I mean it's verydifferent but similar, same,
same but different?
Spit Like when you guys havelike performances and stuff like
are you, when these are doneregardless of like, are you just
like drained, don't want totalk to anybody?
Speaker 3 (09:14):
Are you guys all amped up or like yeah, I think
there's a, there's a process ofcoming down from something like
that.
It's funny, when you said, youknow you can't travel, I'm
wondering, like, could you be ina band Like you literally never
stop traveling, it's all you doall day long, and especially
for us.
You know we weren't.
You know we did fairly well forourselves and we were really
(09:35):
lucky and I'm very, you know,happy.
We did what we did and the waywe did it.
But we weren't one of thosebands in a bus with a driver.
You know we were drivingourselves.
Um, you know, for the good partof a decade, you know my father
was our tour manager, uh, so hecame with us and uh, him and I
basically shared the drivingwith our drummers just the three
of us out of like eight or ninepeople that we trusted enough
to drive, you know.
(09:56):
Um, so there is a process, butnormally we were leaving the
club pretty much right awaybecause we had to drive to get
to the next club.
Uh, bands with a driver.
They're sticking around andthen when they they get back to
the bus at four or five am, thedriver takes over, drives them
to the next town.
Uh, for us it's like get packedup as fast as you can and get
out of there.
So as much as like for me, I'msuper extroverted and I would
(10:16):
love to stick around and signevery autograph and meet
everyone.
It was kind of out of necessitythat we just get in the truck
and once you get in the, uh, inthe rv, you know, man, we had
some weird stuff.
I mean, we listened, you knowwe would be chill, we had the
lights on and we'd get our, ourcereal out and we'd start
watching the friends box set orwhatever.
You know, we just just uh,relaxing.
(10:37):
Basically, we were big relaxersoutside of playing the show,
even though we're all likepretty extroverted.
It was like all you can do justto get recharged for the next
night when you're doing, youknow, 300 shows a year.
That's crazy.
Speaker 2 (10:50):
That's crazy, have you ever seen the movie Green
Room?
No.
Speaker 3 (10:56):
I don't know why.
I mean, it sounds familiar, butprobably just because it's two
common words jammed together.
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (11:00):
I don't think so it's got oh my gosh, who's the bald
guy from X-Men in the wheelchair?
Professor X, yeah, that actor,kingsley Ben Kingsley, is that
it?
Speaker 3 (11:13):
I don't know it's, got him it's got like Anton
Yelchin.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
it's about this punk band that goes on a tour to you
know like they're.
They're they're trying to getgas money, like they're just
going from gig to gig, dude,like trying to make it whatever.
And they end up getting bookedat this place and they get there
and they realize it's like this, like this white supremacist
gig that they're doing thatthey're doing right and like it
(11:41):
gets.
Speaker 3 (11:42):
Yeah, it's an amazing movie, dude.
Oh, did you see that's?
Speaker 2 (11:44):
why I wanted to bring it up was that was that in new
jersey?
Dude, dude you have.
You have to look this up, dude.
The movie is like one of myfavorite horror movies it's.
It's amazing, like you guyswould really like it, I think.
Speaker 3 (11:52):
But okay, it's a horror movie.
Oh cool yeah.
Oh yeah, oh yeah, dude it getscrazy.
Like, sounds, like, like soundslike a reality TV.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
Dude, it might give you PTSD then because, like you
know, I looked at reading thereviews and stuff, or like
people's comments, and I've seenlike one or two people be like
you know I used to.
You know this reminds me oflike touring with my friends and
like it's creepy.
Anyway, check it out.
Speaker 3 (12:16):
I'd like to pick your brain on it some other time
when you you know it god, Ithink it might have been us um,
because we, one of the firstshows we played when we were 14,
you know we got signed prettyyoung.
It was always a dream of oursand we, you know, we were all
pretty hard workers and, um, wekind of made it happen.
Uh, we left a lot of things,let a lot of things go.
I played baseball, golf in highschool.
(12:37):
Our singer was like thequarterback for the varsity team
when he was a junior.
You know like we were, or Idon't know sophomore sorry, but
we were.
We were all like we had a lotof things going, but we we
wanted to make the music thinghappen.
So we left a lot of thingsbehind.
But when we did that, you knowwe got signed pretty quickly and
one of the first shows we gotbefore we ever got a major label
(12:58):
deal, we were playing in in thebaltimore city.
Here there's a, there's a venueconnected to the building where
the, the courthouse is inbaltimore city, which is kind of
odd because it's like askinhead bar.
Apparently we we didn't knowthat, you know we're 14, but
there was a band called messedand I forget where they're from.
I want to say they're westcoast, but it's like a, like a
punk band punk, but they werelike gutter punks and you know
(13:19):
we opened for them.
We had to leave, basicallybecause we were underage and
it's like you know, you had tobe a drinking age to get in
there.
We're kind of standing outside,we're watching the show.
We're like sitting by the door.
They let us kind of hang out.
And midway through MEST show,somebody threw a beer at stage
(13:44):
and it hit the guitar player.
So he immediately, like,without we didn't even blink he
walks off the stage with hisguitar and just starts beating
the living shit out of him.
Like right, you know, it's noteven really a stage.
Like the stage is the sameheight as the floor, it's just,
you know, dive.
And so we're like, oh shit.
We're like, wow, man, this islike one of our first shows.
We're like this is just how itis, like this is gonna be like
this every night.
This is crazy.
And we're like.
And so we're like we help them.
I don't know.
It's like well, we're 14, maybenot.
Um, so anyway, they get back onstage, they start playing, the
bar kicks the three or four guysthat were together out.
(14:05):
Well, we're at, we know we'rekind of outside.
They're finishing up the showand here comes this truck around
the corner.
Big truck raised up swampers,you know some, probably skinhead
flags off the back.
There's like 10 guys jump outof this thing, molotov cocktails
like baseball bats.
They just start beating theshit out of their tour bus, bust
every window out of it,slashing the tires, and we're
like holy shit man this is it.
(14:27):
We made it really yeah, likefuck, this is gonna be.
This is so cool, like our firstnight.
It's always gonna be like thisamazing.
But, um, you know, our, our,our singer's dad is our manager,
my dad was was our tour manager.
They like grab us, like get thehell in the car.
We're going home.
No, we got to help them.
No, you're not.
Yeah, yeah, babies, get in thedamn car.
But it was like that man,there's skinheads everywhere.
(14:48):
We got put on all these tourslike hardcore punk scene tours,
and we were you know the thingsadolescent kids want to do Like
we.
We had no ax to grind, we hadgood lives, we were just trying
to have fun, and so Do you think?
Speaker 2 (15:04):
that's.
Do you think that's like asorry to cut you off, but like,
is that like specific, more toto punk, probably Because
there's so many?
I okay, cause that's the placeand you don't really know the
locale per se and the clientele,and like for sure.
Speaker 3 (15:26):
But I think, as a band starting out like it
doesn't matter what genre youare like, you'll take whatever
show you can get.
And the tours we got you know,because we had, we were pop punk
.
We were pop, a band that waslike had pop punk.
They put us on punk tours withactual punk bands and everyone
hated us man.
So our first year was brutal.
We played to 300 people flickingus off the whole time, throwing
(15:49):
shit at us, cussing us out,yeah, but it made us tough.
We had to learn the hard wayright away and we were like,
well, shit, we still love it, wedon't care, we'll find our fans
eventually.
It's kind of what we just toldeach other and we kept going and
we did.
We had like a 10 year good, 10year run.
So, but it is those punk shows,man, like the, the northeast
corridor especially.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
it's brutal, absolutely it's so cool, dude,
and and I, for people who don'tknow, you know, his original
band or his band that he's in iswakefield, um, and I bring it
up just cause like it'sinteresting to me and I
mentioned this before we had torestart it but, like you know,
when I was in high school,graduated 2005,.
We're all around similar ages,I think somewhat, and you know I
(16:30):
used to love like Taking BackSunday, the Starting Line, like
all these kinds of bandsespecially.
A lot of them came up locallytoo, you know, northeast of, of
course, and and I and I knew Iknew of your band, which was
just so cool to me to randomlyrun into you on Farcaster and
then a discord and becomefriends, that, like you know, a
band that I, that I would havelike done anything to, like meet
(16:50):
or hang out with you know as akid and stuff.
Speaker 3 (16:55):
Getting to meet later in life is just, it's just
awesome.
Speaker 2 (16:56):
It's kind of cool.
How like hey, for real, thoughyou know, it's just awesome.
It's kind of cool how like hey,for real, though you know, it's
like uh, it's weird how time islike a flat circle with so many
in so many ways, you know.
Speaker 3 (17:03):
It is, and it's such a small world man Like I feel
like a lot of you guys that I'vemet through um, through crypto,
really it's.
You know, we've all some of thesame interests, been to some of
the same bars or shows, or youknow venues, or it's just it's
cool how you can meet people, um, that you could become friends
with instantly.
Um, you know, like you weresaying today I think you made a
(17:23):
post about there's like ahandful of people you know, or
more that you would send 10grand to right now that you've
never met before in real life.
Just because you trust them,because you know them on that
level.
And that's been the coolestthing to me about being, uh, in
crypto, you know, besides theall the other reasons you come
here is just like it's so coolto meet people with those niche
interests that you reallyconnect with and it's like you
(17:45):
feel like you've known them yourwhole life and you trust them
more than a couple of yourbuddies you're gonna see, you
know, next weekend down at thebar.
Speaker 1 (17:51):
So yeah, especially after just a few weeks on
farcaster.
You're like well, this is goodenough, like we have some, that
was exciting oh well, mark,especially, it's so cool to get
to see you.
Speaker 3 (18:03):
Obviously, this is a podcast, but we're on video.
I mean like meeting you sort ofthis is it's cool Cause we've
been talking, you know, beingnew dads around the about the
same time, um, and then justsort of being able to share a
little bits of that journey,here and there as we've we've
been going, has been really cool.
Um, even super kind to me andum, you know, hopefully I've
reciprocated.
But it's been neat and hopefullywe can continue to do it, cause
(18:24):
it's it's such a cool thing.
And, to you know, I don't havemany most of my friends, their
kids are much older and havegrown up and they've moved on.
So, like I'm experiencing thesethings, I feel like sort of by
myself in real life with my, myreal life friends.
So it's cool to have otherpeople that you really trust and
you, you know, you appreciatewhat they have to say, uh, going
through it at the same time.
(18:45):
So, thank you Could you?
Speaker 1 (18:46):
yeah, could you imagine like we're both around
the same age later in life kids,like if we had to go to, like
dad support groups and, like youknow, hang out with like 23
year olds about, you know,raising?
A kid and their, their,problems, like it's been perfect
to have this scenario.
There's even a couple otherguys in there having having
babies right around the sametime.
It's kind of wild dude.
Speaker 2 (19:04):
There's a lot, I would say like four or five of
you guys.
They literally just had a babywithin the past like two months,
which is awesome, dude, and itcouldn't be like a better group
of people too.
Like, if there's anyone I wantto be procreating, it's the
people in Discord that I likeand that I would send money to
that I don't really know.
That's the people I want.
But, to your point though, it'sbeen so true, dude, and it's
(19:26):
awesome that, just like theInternet in general, I feel like
it's so cool to be able to makefriends of shared common
interests versus friends ofproximity, which is the only
thing we had before the internetand stuff, you know, and and
not always the the friends ofproximity aren't always the
friends that you know you wouldhave made if, if you had a
choice.
You know what I mean.
So, um, meeting you guys hasbeen awesome and and like Mark
(19:49):
and I and Craig and stuff, andwe we've only actually we
thought about this their day.
It's been like is it two yearsnow or something, which is like
like gross, but it feels likeseven lifetimes in crypto.
Speaker 3 (19:59):
Yeah dude?
Speaker 2 (20:01):
oh my gosh, I know.
Yeah, man, it's awesome though,dude and like and I was just
thinking today too like we needto probably reach out to a
couple more friends.
If we know anybody like we have, you know anybody spit or mark
that we can bring in like goodpeople, you know, just to keep
the vibe going it's been so easyto do that with farcaster, like
(20:22):
just it's so positive, right.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
It's feel like it is like before farcaster and then
afterwards.
It's just two differenttimelines, like of meeting
friends, because you're goingthere and you bought in a group
of like 20 people within weeksand look how many people are
still sticking around gettingalong like it's I don't know.
Speaker 3 (20:39):
It's been incredible yeah, I do have a question for
spit yeah, I don't know whatit's like, was it?
Speaker 1 (20:46):
did you really enjoy like traveling with your dad all
the time in the in the band asa manager?
Well, is it a good thing, a badthing, like?
Speaker 2 (20:53):
especially that mean right
Speaker 3 (20:58):
I mean, um, you know, like I said, we we got signed.
Basically, we, we started theband.
We were like 13, 14, we saidwe're gonna get signed within a
year.
Um, I'm sure a lot of you youknow, you guys know the band
good, charlotte, but we grew upwith them.
They practiced in my garage.
Um, their drummer was oursinger's brother, so we were
very close with them.
(21:18):
We played a lot of gigs withthem.
Uh, we saw them get signed andwe practiced next to them and
we're like these guys suck dude,like we watch them every day,
like they're terrible musicians.
They don't even write their ownsongs.
They just, you know, they stealother people's songs and change
the melody and like we can dothat.
So it gave us a lot ofconfidence seeing them do that.
And you know, for saying that,like they are some of the
(21:41):
smartest, savviest businessmenI've ever met.
Benji and Joel, the twins, Imean they would use their own
mother to get where they neededto go and they did that to a lot
of people.
But there's some lessons inthere.
You know, their father kind ofleft them for dead and they
didn't have anyone else.
Man, they had to like bondtogether and they did and it was
a strong bond and they weresuper, super smart and savvy
(22:02):
about the way they went aboutbeing artists.
But for us, you know, it wasjust.
We came at it from a little bitdifferent angle, like it wasn't
a necessity.
You know, it was just somethingwe really wanted to do and you
know, from there it's likeeverything else is a cherry on
top.
Yeah, having my dad around wasawesome.
I love my dad.
My dad was my boss from the dayI can remember he builds custom
(22:24):
homes.
I used to work for him.
We had a really close bond.
He was the coach of my baseballteam, coach of my soccer team.
We did everything together.
I was very lucky in that regard,because being on tour is not
easy.
Man.
The way the contracts arewritten, you're not guaranteed
anything, even if it says we'regoing to pay you 20% of the door
(22:45):
, 50% of the door, 15% of merch,whatever your contract says.
Then you got to actually getthe money.
The first part's easy.
The second part is difficult,especially if not a lot of
people show up or if it's a downseason or whatever the hell the
case may be bad weather nobodywants to pay you, especially
your little snot-nosed kid likeget the hell out of my face.
Yeah, so having your fatherthere to be like well, actually,
(23:07):
that's true, you're gonna payus, I'm gonna whip your ass was
actually pretty nice and, andyou know, he was the first one
to get us drugs in the new city.
He's the first one to makefriends and find girls to send
back to the rv, like that's myboy man, my dad's the best man,
my wedding we're super close, sofor most people that probably
sounds like a nightmare scenario.
For me, it was ideal, absolutelyideal.
Speaker 2 (23:28):
That's exciting did you ever like so just talking,
you know what you mentioned withthe other band and everything
like did you guys, um, inwakefield, ever sit down and
like, have and make like aconscious decision to be like
we're going to do it, what wethink of in the right way, like
was that important to you guys?
If that makes sense at all?
Speaker 3 (23:49):
I think in so as much as we are going to do as much
as we possibly can and work ashard as we possibly can to to
get as far as we can.
We knew we weren't particularlymusically gifted, like you know
, especially back then.
You know this is before theinternet when we first started.
So you know, you hear all thesebands and there's a lot of
(24:12):
great bands and maybe, if youknow, one of the great things
about social media is you canconnect with your fans.
You can find people and it'smuch easier now with the way the
technology has evolved.
You don't need a big studio.
You can record a record in yourhouse and it can sound great
for, like you know, a smallfraction of what it used to cost
.
But another part of that islike you're exposed to all these
insane musicians.
(24:33):
Like I could pull up Instagramright now and find 10 better
guitar players than fuckingYngwie Malmsteen or you know who
you name it.
You name your favorite guitarplayer.
There's people right now thatno one's ever heard of.
Like you just open your app andlike they're amazing.
I probably would have gottendiscouraged, to be honest, but
we didn't know any better.
You know, the only thing weknew was these guys that got
signed in my garage and theyweren't very good.
(24:54):
You know I love them to death.
But uh, you know I think it wasmore naivete and just thinking
like.
But we knew my father owned hisown business, our singer's dad
owned his own business.
We saw, hard work can actuallyget you as far as you want to go
anywhere, no matter what you'redoing, if you put your mind to
(25:14):
it and you're willing tosacrifice.
And that's what we did.
We practiced eight, ten hours aday.
We choreographed everything.
We put football helmets on, wego in the yard, throw our
guitars back and forth in theair.
Like our whole show, down tothe every second, was
choreographed.
And we knew it like the back ofour hand.
We could do it with our eyesclosed and that's how we got
signed is like, not necessarilythe music, I mean it's okay, but
(25:36):
we put on a show that, like,you would want to go see.
And when, when record execscame out to see that they're
like man, this is a cool, coolshow, like we could probably do
something with these guys.
So it was more about.
You know, when you say theright way, like musically, what
does that mean Purist probablymeans something different to us
as sons of made men.
That's what it meant to us waslike you work your ass off to
(25:57):
get it.
Speaker 2 (26:01):
Yeah, I only brought it up because I've recently been
watching this show on Netflix.
I don't know if you guys everheard of it, called Outlast.
If you've ever watched Alonethose kind of survival shows,
it's along the same vein.
But when I first heard it on Iwas like, ah, I'm just kind of
bored, I'll put it on in thebackground.
And all of a sudden, an episodelater, I found myself glued to
the TV because it's a survivalshow but there's like four teams
(26:25):
, you know, and it just devolvedinto like a total like war
between, like certain peoplewere like we're here to win the
right way, like I'd rather justgo home than do what they're
doing.
And then other people were likestealing people's sleeping bags
and like it's like sub-zerotemperature and they're like
plotting and like burning thingdude, they're like we'll burn
the whole camp down, yeah.
(26:45):
So like I don't know.
It's just made me really kindof think of things lately
because as I'm watching that,like the two people who were, it
was like these two women I waslike I hate these people, dude,
Like these are the worst people,and it just kind of made me
appreciate the people that areout there trying to you know,
take it, I guess doing, taking alittle harder path, but doing
things you know in the way thatthey think is right.
(27:07):
At least you know.
Speaker 3 (27:13):
Yeah, I think if you have the artistic capability,
then that's maybe a strugglethat you have to have with
yourself when you know, whenyou're you know, three 14 year
old kids, man, like that wasn'teven a thought in our mind it
was just like let's work as hardas we can.
But, you know, good artistsborrow, great artists steal
right, like that's every great,successful artist that I've
really met.
For the most part and it's nottrue for everyone they've had
(27:34):
some form of that.
You know, whatever it is, youknow God, the business is just
scummy man, like I don't reallyknow how else to put it, and
maybe not now that you can kindof do it on your own on the
Internet, but back then it'slike we were part of a dying
industry and we saw the cometcoming, you know, and we're
standing there with's weird.
(28:02):
I kind of wish we had come alittle bit later, and you know,
if that makes any sense, like Ithink, with with what we had,
like the tools became much morewidely available to just do your
stuff at home, how you want tospend the time.
Studio time back then wasexpensive, man.
We we were, you know, luckyenough, thank God.
You know, I don't know it's adouble-edged sword, because I'm
(28:27):
so happy that we got to playmusic in some of these hallowed
venues and these hallowed spaces, these studios that don't exist
anymore because they couldn'tpay their rent.
They were selling theirmicrophones, like, while we're
there, we were watching ithappen, like cello, like we
stood in the room.
You know we're like RageAgainst the Machine recorded
their first album, and like theChili Peppers and Weezer.
And like you're standing therelike Rivers played ping pong
right here, like this is prettycool and the sounds of those
(28:48):
rooms like you'll just never getthem again.
So we are losing that and I'mhappy to be a part of that.
But, that being said, like thatwasn't going to help us a whole
lot.
You know for what we did.
So you put it.
You know I've always toldpeople this like they ask, you
know, if they ask about guitars,like is it the type of guitar?
(29:09):
Like is it the expensive guitarthat makes you sound good?
Is it the expensive amp, theboutique tubes?
You know all this stuff andit's like really no man, if you
get a good musician and givethem a kid's toy, like they'll
figure out how to make it soundawesome.
They got something to say andpeople are going to want to hear
it, regardless of what they'replaying it on.
So like that kind of translatesto where we are now with the
music industry Like you don'tneed all these people like
(29:30):
sucking on you like a leechbecause they're providing you
the means to get that big musicvideo on that channel or
whatever.
You know you don't need thatanymore.
So I love that so much and youknow I don't have the energy
like I used to, so that sort ofpassed me a little bit.
Now I just kind of do what Iwant to do.
But you know, for a kidstarting out in the music
business man like this is such agreat time to be alive to be
(29:53):
doing that.
Speaker 1 (29:54):
Are you going to encourage your daughter to get
into the music business?
See what she likes to do.
Speaker 3 (29:56):
I already have her a guitar Hold on one second.
Speaker 1 (29:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (30:00):
That's sick dude, sick dude, cool man, that's
awesome.
It's awesome to talk to him,dude, about this stuff because,
like, like I said, I was, I wasa fan growing up, man, so it's
like wow to get like this.
I know just seeing you.
Yeah, dude, it's cool oh, andthere he is.
Oh nice, that's hers.
Speaker 3 (30:14):
That's a cool guitar dude so it's like a little mini
gibson made these only for acouple years.
Um, I forget what it's called,but it's a little mini flying v.
It's got a short scale neck sothe little kids can get their
hands around it.
So I'm super stoked to get herplaying this and get some videos
oh, that's cool.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
Uh, what age would you expect her to start playing?
Speaker 3 (30:31):
um, I'm gonna wake her up in a second start getting
her on her rudiments startgetting her on her scales.
Eat, you know, at least theminor blues.
By what?
Next week?
How old is she?
Speaker 1 (30:41):
two and a half months I mean she's already traveling
the world at this point, goingto different sporting events and
everything getting in the ocean.
Speaker 3 (30:48):
She's seasoned, so how about you guys?
How do you feel about this?
Cause it's something that Ithink about often is like you
hear the stories of the greatsman like Tiger Woods and and, uh
, you know so many, um, fathersare always hard asses that are
just like you're going to dothis, you're going to do it
right, or you're getting 12lashings, you know, till you hit
that note or whatever it is,and you see, like that can
(31:10):
produce greatness, but obviouslyat a cost.
Like a lot of these people arescrewed up mentally and like in
their social lives, right, Imean, what do you guys think
about that?
As far as, like, when it comesto your kid, like in the path
they may choose for their careeror any sort of outlet they may
have?
Speaker 1 (31:26):
I feel like they need to have the interest and the
desire themselves right.
If they don't, they're justgoing to shut down.
I coached baseball for all myfive younger brothers, and so I
coached them for like a decadealmost, and every year there
were kids dropping out who aregreat, because their dads would
just get on them.
They didn't enjoy the gameanymore and then they didn't
(31:46):
even want to play when it cameto high school and everybody
wondered why, like this eliteathlete is done and they just
didn't enjoy it.
I think, as long as the kidenjoys whatever they're doing
music, sports, like they maywant to get better at it, I
don't know.
Speaker 2 (32:00):
Yeah, and I'm in the same boat.
I mean, I just want to supportmy kid with whatever he wants to
do.
Me and my wife talked aboutthis stuff.
You know, obviously, when wewere first having a kid and one
of the first things was, like Ireally hope he doesn't want to
play football, dude, like I justdon't want him to play football
because, you know, because likethe brain stuff, I've had
(32:21):
concussions and and now I havemigraines and I think that's to
cross that bridge, luckilybecause he doesn't have an
interest.
But we were like, yeah, we'llsupport him.
And you know, hey, just reallyquickly, I know this is kind of
off, well, it's kind of offtopic, but like, weirdly enough,
dude, my uncle makes guitarsand has like made guitar.
He has like had like a factoryin Japan for the longest time
and I don't know I doubt youwould know I'm looking him up
(32:44):
right now to see him all,because he gave the one in the
back there.
Is that?
See, I'm not an expert Is thatlike a fender or something like
that?
Is that something different?
Speaker 3 (32:51):
That's like a guitar aficionado no-transcript.
Speaker 2 (33:09):
I'm just kind of interested to see if yeah.
Speaker 3 (33:10):
I'm getting your uncle's number.
So first you guys.
So what you're saying is you'reboth raising losers.
First of all, I'm going to gowake my daughter up and beat her
right after we finish this, getto work, tell right after we
finish this, get to work, tellher to start rosining up her bow
(33:31):
.
No, no, I agree 100.
I mean my, my dad was a hardass and I saw his father kind of
beat it into him and he didn'tdo that with me, thank god.
I mean he, he, he tried hisbest not to, let's put it that
way.
Um, sometimes you can't help it, but you know, that's all we
can hope.
Right is there?
I guess that they're happy andenjoying what they're doing.
But man, it's like how coolwould it be to raise like the
next?
You know, that's all we canhope, right Is there?
I guess that they're happy andenjoying what they're doing.
But man, it's like how coolwould it be to raise like the
(33:51):
next you know great athlete orgreat at something you know, and
like it takes, you know youhave to.
I don't know, I don't know.
That's that's love, right?
It comes out as as pain andsuffering, and I don't know.
Speaker 1 (34:06):
I had one.
I had one of my youngerbrothers he's like 10 years
younger than me wanted to bethat elite athlete and wanted to
like had that drive and wouldcome off the field and or after,
like he, you know got out andbe like, what was wrong with my
swing there?
How can I do better?
Or like, how could I havefielded that ball better?
And like, if you have a kidlike that, like you and your dad
you know.
And like, if you have a kidlike that, it like you, like you
and your dad, you know outtraveling.
(34:27):
If you have that relationship,it makes it better and it's more
enjoyable when they succeed, ifthey're truly wanting to like
get better themselves.
But I had another brother who,like wanted to stay home because
he got sunburned.
Right, you know you're notgonna like make that kid try to
be as best as he can be if theydon't want to.
Speaker 2 (34:42):
That's going to go the opposite direction see, with
my dad like, uh, you know his,his stepdad was like abusive and
stuff and like I I stillremember to this day even.
I still think there's a fisthole in the wall of my
grandmom's door, of her house,of her bedroom, and that was
there ever since I was a littlekid, like, and it was from his
(35:02):
stepdad, who I never met.
But my dad would tell me thatlike his stepdad would come in
drunk and then literally justpunch him in the back of the
head at the dinner table andlike so my dad was very much
like not like you know what Imean and very much like,
whatever you want to do, Isupport you and and never
pressured me for anything likethat, so, which I'm thankful for
is that your dad that we see inthe fishing uh pictures?
(35:26):
That's.
That is my wife's dad.
So, um, yeah, my, my, uhin-laws live in the same town as
us.
Uh, here my parent, my dad,lives in Philadelphia still, and
my mom's down in Florida andeverything so kind of split up,
but it's not as you guysprobably are.
You are you close to familyright now?
Spit Like you guys live nearclose to your family, or.
Speaker 3 (35:46):
Yeah, we're.
We're about an hour and a halffrom my family and Heather, my
wife, her family, is like fiveminutes away, so it's really
nice, you need one family close.
Speaker 2 (35:56):
Definitely need them.
Me and Mark talk about this.
I'm like I don't know howpeople live away from their
families.
And now, like, can you imagine?
Speaker 3 (36:05):
With a kid, it's impossible.
Speaker 2 (36:07):
Dude can you imagine being a single parent in a town
that's not like where yourfamily lives either.
Like, how do you even do this?
Like?
That doesn't even make sense tome.
It's crazy.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
You could never afford it.
It gives you a lot moreadmiration for the people who do
that.
Speaker 2 (36:21):
Oh, the hell out of their hair dude, so do you have.
Speaker 1 (36:25):
Are you over at your in-laws all the time, or do they
come to you?
Speaker 3 (36:29):
they come to us now, but we we've had to have the
talk this week.
You know my wife's going backfull-time now and she, um, she
runs, uh, health care practiceand it's actually like, uh, it's
a conglomerate.
They left the umbrella theywere under and they're starting
their own sort of group now withseveral ENTs around the area.
(36:50):
And basically the guy that theyhired to do this got fed up.
You know they wanted him tocook the dinner and they didn't
want him to buy the groceriesand for him, you know they were
paying him a lot of money but itwas like a pride thing and
basically my wife was just underhim and he's like, look, I'm
leaving, this is your gig now.
And she's like I'm having achild.
(37:11):
What do you mean?
So the day we got home from thehospital my wife went back to
work.
She's been working on thecomputer remote, she's been
trying to piecemeal this companyback together and basically
they're making her, you know,executor of operations, like
she's running a company now.
So it's, you know, she gotthrusted sort of into it.
(37:32):
It's a great opportunity.
She's super excited.
We are very thankful and she'sgood at what she does and it's
going to be perfect.
But in the meantime we have atwo month old and it's like I'm
on the road all day and ourin-laws are getting uh, you know
to an advanced age.
And so we're like, well, whatdo you do?
I don't even know what to.
So it's like, uh, obviouslythere's places that'll that'll
(37:52):
take your, your babies.
But it's like, do you reallywant to give your baby to a
stranger, you know?
It's like, so I'm at the pointwhere I might just be like, hey,
I'm going'd enjoy it.
I mean, that's the discussionwe're having.
So this weekend I think weactually have to make that
decision.
I can do real estate, which iswhat I do now pretty much from
(38:14):
home anyway.
So I think that'd be actuallypretty cool.
I can sit home and play withher.
So I'm looking forward to that.
I know you guys, I guess you'rekind of off right now, mark.
He guess you're kind of offright now, mark.
He says like you're off seasonso you're getting like summer
semester.
Speaker 1 (38:26):
Yeah, we're fortunate too that we took a year off
from seeing patients, so, uh,we're not having to see any
patients and it's summer, so wereally don't have that much work
.
So, and we both work remotelycurrently, so it's all the
everyday with the baby, which isnice.
But also now they're trying toget back into things like we've
created a Velcro baby and heliterally can't put her down for
(38:47):
anything, so somebody is alwaysholding her and the other
person is there taking a nap ortrying to work out, and then
we're putting work last.
So eventually we'll have tomove that up the ladder.
Speaker 3 (38:56):
You guys were talking about this in one of the past
episodes, about like and my wifesays this all the time being in
health care, like you knowwhat's what's cool about having
a wife in health care,especially with a newborn, is
like I don't ever have to thinkabout anything.
Yes, um, my opinions are notneeded.
That's true or wanted.
I just I say what do we do?
What do we do?
And she tells us and that'sgreat, that's amazing.
Speaker 2 (39:15):
Um gives me a lot of bandwidth for other things.
Speaker 3 (39:19):
But they were saying like you can't spoil a newborn,
right is the saying.
So it's like she crying.
Whatever she wants, just giveit to her.
Speaker 2 (39:24):
You know I'm like what is the cutoff like when?
Speaker 3 (39:27):
can we when do we start creating the?
Speaker 1 (39:28):
monster.
I ask my mom that, like everytime I see her, because she's
she works in a NICU and she saidthe same thing you can't spoil
a newborn yeah, it was your momright yeah, and like every day
like we feel like we're puttingourselves deeper in a hole but
at the same time, like we'reolder parents where it's gonna
be a one child, like why notgive all the love you can,
exactly.
Speaker 3 (39:48):
I don't really care.
I feel like that's somethingyou said, ed yeah, I heard you
talking about with your son.
Like why not, you know, oncethey're 18, like they're, they
don't want you anything to dowith you anymore.
Like why not, you know?
Speaker 2 (39:58):
dude, there's like, I mean, there's so many different
ways to parent, there's so manydifferent styles.
If there really was one methodthat worked, then we would all
know it.
Um, ultimately, I just feellike the best thing we can do is
just love your kid as much asyou can, dude, and then you hope
to god that they meet goodpeople and have good influences
elsewhere.
Um, I don't know, I don't everlike, is my kid spoiled like
(40:19):
absolutely dude?
Probably very much so, but Idon't know.
Speaker 1 (40:22):
I want him to have everything that he wants and
yeah, but you you have likealmost a weekly story of he's
spoiled with you and your wife,but he's not spoiled out in like
the general public, right?
He's nice to other people.
Yeah, he has friends like.
You're teaching him how to likebe, you know, interact well
with others, not just like aspoiled single child definitely
(40:43):
that's so true.
Speaker 3 (40:44):
It's like.
Speaker 2 (40:45):
It's like spoiling them with your attention yeah,
and like just different, just benice.
That's the only thing andthat's the what we tell him too,
being my wife.
We're like dude, we want you toget good grades sure, cool,
whatever.
We want you to do this ourselfcool, whatever.
But the most important thing isthat you're nice to other
people, because that's howyou're going to really get
places.
To be honest, you know whatwhat I mean, as you guys know
very well, I'm sure.
(41:05):
And um, you know, he like hecame back from camp and he got
like the kindest camper Dude.
We were like over the moon dude.
That's like.
And meanwhile, he's like I hateyou dad, like, oh, I get all
your money too long here, spit,I guess.
Mark, do you have any questionsor anything you want to ask him
(41:26):
before we?
Speaker 1 (41:27):
we let him let me and I could ask him questions for
hours, but I just want to saythank you for taking the time
here to join us.
You know it's been a long timecoming to actually meet you.
Speaker 3 (41:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (41:36):
Yeah, thank you very much, man.
Speaker 3 (41:37):
I feel like.
Speaker 2 (41:50):
I feel like you know somebody do you uh.
So this is something.
I would like to bring it backbecause I we used to do it, but
I guess we haven't in a while.
But spit, what are?
Uh, give me two of yourfavorite movies of all time.
And and why?
Dude like just off the top ofyour head if you can't really
think of it, because I know it'sputting you on the spot there.
But like, what are two thatcome to your mind, like I don't
mind being put on the spot.
Speaker 3 (42:06):
I'm not a big movie guy, like, admittedly, like I
don't know if I've never beendiagnosed with adhd, but like I
can't really sit still longenough for movies, um, which is
weird because I could sit at acomputer and record music all
day non-stop.
But I feel like there's a lotof like, there's some intricacy
to that and there's like a lotof little things that you're
doing and you're switching it upvery often.
(42:27):
But my favorite movie ever isHook.
It's not even close.
I've got a huge crush on Tink,obviously, like from the moment
I saw that movie.
So every movie she's been in,like God, my wife will you know
if it's on, but hey, you canleave it on this one, you know,
(42:51):
yeah, I'm always giving her shitfor like watching his old
movies.
I'm like, oh no, yeah, it'sperfect, uh.
But yeah, hook for sure is likemy favorite.
Um, god, I was.
I was a big fan of um it's.
I'm not gonna say anythingserious, I'm sure like you know,
is it serious movies that youlove?
Speaker 2 (43:01):
no, no, no, they're never serious.
Speaker 3 (43:02):
No, not, okay good because serious movies kind of
just bore the shit out of me.
Speaker 1 (43:06):
There's good ones and it's fine.
Speaker 3 (43:08):
But I'm like, I'm not into like the shot.
I don't give a fuck about theshot or whatever or like the
aspect ratio.
Speaker 1 (43:14):
Yeah, no, no, no, I don't like audience films.
It's fine.
Speaker 3 (43:17):
Yeah, it's fine, sure , and like the three ninjas too
dude ninjas kick back orwhatever strike back.
Which one was it dude?
Speaker 2 (43:27):
yes, yeah, dude, I used to love me my stepbrother.
Dude, I grew up with astepbrother.
We're no longer, don't you know?
Our parents divorced, but likewe used to watch those movies,
all three ninjas, and there wasa big 90s karate thing going on,
dude, like we love karate.
Speaker 3 (43:43):
Yes, love karate.
Speaker 2 (43:44):
Karate was everything though there was three ninjas
and there was like somethingelse that was.
Now I'm going to have to lookthis up.
It was very similar to it, butanyway, man, that's great Core
memory unlocked yeah.
Speaker 3 (43:54):
Thank you Well, thanks so much for doing this Um
the book that I was sayingearlier, but the One of the
pages that really stuck with meand I was going to share it with
you earlier.
But it's like the mole askedthe boy, what do you want to be
when you grow up?
And the boy says kind, and Ithought it was pretty profound.
Not many people think of thatas a destination or, as I don't
(44:17):
know, an outcome, but that iswhat else could you want to be,
especially for your children oryourself.
So you saying that earlier justreally made me think of that.
I had to pull it back up.
Certainly appreciate you guyshaving me on.
It's a lot of fun, that'sawesome, yeah.
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