Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Season five begins
today.
Thank you for your continuedsupport and sharing the podcast.
Season five is going to havesome spectacular guests.
I can't wait to get startedwith you.
Well, welcome to OrdinaryPeople, Extraordinary Things.
I'm here with Laura.
Laura, thanks for being on.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Thank you, it's nice
to be here.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
I'm so excited that
you said you'd be on.
We have a mutual friend,Bridget, and she got us
connected.
Speaker 2 (00:31):
Yes, she's great,
love her and she just had her
book come out and I'm superproud of her.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
So, yes, I've read it
, it's really good.
Yes, so if people don't knowwho you are, can you give three
words or phrases that describeyou?
Speaker 2 (00:48):
yeah, that's it's.
That was an interesting thingto think about.
Um, I, for me, I would saybeauty, collaboration and impact
are three words that describeme, beauty being all arts,
different things like that, justcapturing and cherishing kind
(01:08):
of moments of beauty.
And then collaboration workingwith other people, team building
, those kind of I love workingwith others.
And so collaboration in alldifferent ways.
And then impact for anythingthat I do.
I hope that it would make adifference for the kingdom of
(01:29):
God, so I hope that it has someeternal impact beyond what I'm
doing in the present moment.
Speaker 1 (01:36):
Oh, that's beautiful.
So when you were just sayingthat, you said teamwork and I
feel like something that just ingeneral in our society right
now is that people are kind ofgoing inward.
They're not wanting to bearound people Like they say
things like the world would begreat if it wasn't for people or
you know kind of things thatare kind of funny.
(01:58):
But then on the other handyou're like but you're serious.
Yeah, so what, what?
Like, I just find it sointeresting that you would say
that could you kind of maybeelaborate for that yeah, and I
would.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
I would say it.
It definitely would beintentional relationship
building.
It's not just being with otherpeople, but being intentional
with other people workingtogether.
We can't do things alone, and Ithink often we consider
ourselves especially in Americaindependent individuals.
(02:29):
Even the way our households run, we don't often live with well,
it depends but we don't oftenlive with family after we're
done with college.
If you go to college, differentthings where.
So the community culture iskind of different here, but we
were built to be dependentbeings on God.
(02:50):
Even in the garden, before sinhappened, adam and Eve were
dependent on God and they walkedwith him, and so I think
sometimes we think of dependencyas weakness, but it's actually
not a failure or a weakness.
It's in our DNA of how we weremeant to be dependent on God and
dependent on one another not inunhealthy ways, of course
(03:13):
there's.
We can only really get what wedeep down need from God, but
having that dependency on eachother, we can build something
really cool together, wow.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
That was so beautiful
, thank you.
Thank you for that, I think,maybe for me, maybe I just
needed that today.
Speaker 2 (03:33):
I'm glad.
Speaker 1 (03:34):
So, laura, you lost
your father very publicly when
you were 12.
Is that correct?
Yes, 12 years old, wow, can you, for someone who's like I, have
no idea what you're talkingabout.
Could you give us some context?
Speaker 2 (03:50):
Totally so.
To backtrack a little bit, mydad was an astronaut, so we
moved to Texas when I was fouryears old and he started his
journey at NASA and flew onemission and then on his second
mission, the space shuttleColumbia.
Unfortunately it crashed uponre-entry attempting to land and
(04:14):
so I lost my dad at 12 years oldon the space shuttle Columbia.
He was the commander and thatwas definitely one of those
moments in your life whereeverything kind of pauses and
stands still and it just sticksout obviously for the rest of
your life.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
Yeah, and that was.
That was 20 years ago, just afew months ago, right February
1st 21 years.
Speaker 2 (04:42):
It was 2003.
So 21 years ago, oh gosh 2023.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
But.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
I know years ago.
Speaker 1 (04:52):
Yes, yeah.
Speaker 2 (04:54):
So it's hard to
believe.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
Yeah, yeah, I bet I
can't imagine.
So what, what's it like to alose your dad when you're 12,
but then I'm sure, kind ofpublicly, it makes it a little
bit different too.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
Yeah, I had an
amazing dad, and so I know
everybody has a differentrelationship with their dad, and
that's something, as I'vegotten older, I've really
reflected on as well is I had avery involved dad in my life.
He, yes, was an astronaut, butthat wasn't the biggest thing
(05:34):
that he highlighted at home withus.
He was invested as a dad.
He'd come home and make time tospend with us.
I went on daddy-daughter dates,told me I was beautiful every
day, was very involved in everyaspect of my growing up and was
a very loving father, sharedabout God, and so having that
(06:00):
loss was pretty devastating.
It was, I mean, it's thehardest thing I've ever been
through and it's interesting at12, I felt so much older.
It grew me up so quick.
Now I look at 12 year olds andI have so much compassion for my
younger self and even like it'sheartbreaking to think about 12
(06:22):
year old me, because at thatpoint I felt so grown up.
Your thoughts are reallydeveloped already in a lot of
ways at that age, and so I kindof felt like OK, how am I going
to help my mom?
I have a younger brother whowas seven at the time and all
(06:47):
these questions flooded my headbig and small.
Who's gonna help me with math?
Who's gonna walk me down theaisle one day if I get married?
Who's are we gonna have to getjobs?
Are we gonna have to move, like, how is life going to change
because of this?
And not even that was just likethe initial questions.
Not how am life going to changebecause of this?
And not even that was just likethe initial questions.
Not how am I going to livewithout my dad?
(07:08):
To that obviously came later,as as I grieved, and it's.
It's interesting because peoplewill say so many different
things to you, some helpful,some not.
But I'm so thankful God didsome preparation in my life
before I was 12.
That year before I, I was insixth grade the year before and
(07:35):
I was frustrated because I feltlike the Bible didn't speak to
me, and so I just startedreading my Bible a lot, which is
kind of abnormal for a sixthgrader to just say, okay, oh,
I'm going to read my Bible a lotbecause it doesn't speak to me
and I'm annoyed by that, and soI'm going to read it more.
And that was really God'sprovision, because when that
(07:56):
moment hit, I remember beingback.
We heard the news at NASA crewquarters.
We had been on the landingstrip where they were supposed
to land and we were going togreet them and and see them
again in Florida.
And they take us back to NASAcrew quarters and give us the
news and I remember turning tomy aunt and saying I know God's
(08:19):
going to take care of us.
I don't know how, I know he will.
And those verses that I'd beenreading the year before, that
he's a man of sorrows,acquainted with our grief, that
he heals the brokenhearted, heturns our mourning into dancing,
and that we can trust in himand he will keep our paths
(08:40):
straight.
All these verses started comingto life that at the time wasn't
sure what they meant to me, butI was speaking God and you know
that year before and andclearly he was planting truth in
me so that when I needed it itwould be available to me to
(09:01):
comfort me in ways that I reallydidn't understand.
But I'm so thankful that he didthat for me in that way.
Speaker 1 (09:10):
That's, that's
beautiful.
You know, even like this lastweekend I was chatting with
someone and they they said youknow, I feel far away from God
and and I think what you did wasso lovely, like, like, instead
of just saying I feel far away,I'm just giving up, or he
doesn't exist, or you know amyriad of things.
(09:30):
You said, well, let me press inRight, like, what a good thing
to learn from.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
Yeah, even me,
because I feel like it was God's
grace that pushed me in.
I I really don't know if I cantake credit, because I just
don't think it was a naturalinclination for me.
So I'm just thankful I had thatrelationship with God already
and so he nudged me into that,and so I get.
When God nudges you, I guessjust trust the nudges, because
(10:03):
it it really is.
He's doing more than we knowand I love that his grace works
that way.
I was a sixth grader who didn'tknow anything that was about to
happen in my life, but God did,and he stepped in and was a
good father to me in that waytoo.
Speaker 1 (10:21):
So you were, you
weren't worried, or maybe you
were.
I'm sorry, I just made that upfor you.
You said you were like therefor the landing though, so you
weren't expecting anything to gowrong.
I kind of assume or is therealways a worry, or how you know?
Speaker 2 (10:39):
I knew, my dad being
an astronaut, that it's a risk
to fly, obviously, the space.
But I had always been morenervous about launch day because
of challenger.
That happened in 86 and so Iknew about that and my dad and
mom and you know our familywould have discussions about
(11:02):
there is risk, but we didn'tfixate on that and we trusted
God.
You know that he's in controlof our lives and so we're not
fixating on what might happenand truly landing had never been
a concern before, so everyother mission had gone well when
they had their landing.
(11:23):
So no, I wasn't really worriedat all, maybe a little nervous
like and excited.
And I remember standing thereand there was a countdown clock
counting down the minutes untilthey were to be back and at a
minute out we should have heardthe sonic boom where they break
the sound barrier and that'skind of an indicator they're on
(11:46):
track and coming in and so ithits a minute.
We don't hear the sonic boom.
And I remember my mom startedasking our astronaut friend who
was assigned to us to like helpus understand any technical
things.
I go to her and she's talkingto him and I said mom, is daddy
okay?
And she said no, I don't thinkso.
(12:06):
And that's the moment when mystomach dropped and just, it was
the first time in my life thata and this was a thing that was
out of my mom's control, out ofeveryone's control, and it was
(12:33):
just unexpected, completelyreally.
Yeah, we were not expectinganything to go wrong.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
Yeah, so it sounds
like you went from kind of an
excitement and like a clockgoing down and I can't really
imagine, like the you know theexcitement, the building and you
know, oh, my dad's almost home,and then to have that a
complete switch right like verydrastic, not only an emotion but
time it sounds like.
Speaker 2 (13:01):
Yes, the clock
counted down to zero and then
started counting up positivenumbers of when they should have
been back.
So it's just this weird feelingof they're not there on the
runway and the numbers arecounting up and they're supposed
to be here now, and as a 12year old I think I might have
thought even oh, maybe they'relate.
(13:22):
I wasn't really thinking aboutthe technical side, I wasn't
paying attention and so, yeah,it was rough.
I remember them pushing us tothe cars saying get the crew
families out of here, and therewere press already starting to
try to film us.
Us, and I don't know if itregistered at the time, but it
(13:48):
be.
It became a very public lossfor all of us to experience as
families yeah, and then thecountry's kind of grieving as
well.
Speaker 1 (14:04):
So how does that
affect you when, like, like
you're grieving very personallybut there's other people
grieving and maybe also tryingto?
I'm sure questions got askedright away, right Like what
happened?
Why did this happen?
How can we stop this fromhappening again?
Speaker 2 (14:21):
Right, and again, all
at 12 years old, which in my
mind, I felt older, and so it'sbeen interesting reflecting back
now on different things.
I'm so thankful for my mom.
She was a huge shield for mefrom a lot of things and an
(14:42):
amazing role model through allof the public ceremonies and
things that we did, and I'mstill very close to her.
She's my best friend.
But I just, yeah, we didn'tturn on the TV for at least a
(15:12):
month or more, because theywould replay the crash on TV on
different and have it be a newspot and there'd be new updates
and things.
And most of America knew therewas something wrong before we
did, because it it happened overEast Texas, and so some people
already knew something was wrongbefore we even did.
And then, yeah, there's just amyriad of things that come with
(15:32):
a public loss.
They were pioneers to space andso Americans, and well, it was
an international crew.
We had the first Israeliastronaut on board as well and
the first Indian woman astronaut, so it was a very international
crew there were and they workedso well together.
(15:53):
But the world's eyes were onthat moment and, if it taught me
anything, we're all humanbeings, no matter how visible we
are to public eye.
We all deal with thingsdifferently, we all grieve
differently.
We all have emotions and feelthings and are real human beings
(16:18):
, whether or not we're morevisible to public eye or not.
But it it was hard sometimes.
I didn't want to be openlyemotional at ceremonies and then
have press film me crying.
You know, I I really wantedthat to be private, where I
could privately grieve, and forthe most part I think I was able
(16:40):
to have that and but it it washard at times and then also
feeling like I wanted to sharemy dad's story.
So it's just this bittersweetdance of appreciation for all
the prayers.
There's so many people who I'vemet now who said they were
praying for us then and I knowGod used those prayers and has
(17:04):
used those prayers in our, ourlife and that's cool to see.
That's cool to see people whowere inspired by my dad's story
or inspired by the crew or orsomething like that.
That's been really neat to seeand feel connected in that way.
And then there's the other side.
That's hard when you just wantprivacy and you want to grieve
(17:25):
and you people say you're strongto a 12 year old and that's the
last thing I needed to hear,because already I I'm I'm lean
towards the perfectionistachiever side, as the first, the
first child, I guess maybe ifyou could say, and so I wanted
to hold it together for my momand for my brother, and thank
(17:47):
God for counseling.
I've unpacked a lot of that,but it's.
It definitely was aninteresting landscape where
adults would come up to me andexpress their grief and
sometimes I felt that I had tocomfort them for my dad's loss,
which feels so backward.
(18:09):
But that is how it goessometimes with grief, whether
it's public or not.
People come up to you withtheir emotion and you almost
feel like you need to comfortthem, or it's a weird paradox
sometimes.
Speaker 1 (18:25):
Yeah, Did you feel
like you were defined by this or
you are defined by it?
Speaker 2 (18:35):
Thankfully, because I
know Jesus.
I know I'm not defined by this.
In another way I'm proud ofwhat my dad did and it's very
much a part of me, it's part ofwhat shaped who I am, and God
knew my story and hasorchestrated my story and is the
author of it.
But I went through a time whereI was a little more quiet about
(19:02):
this part of my story because Ididn't want that to be the
first thing that people knewabout me.
I didn't want pity or I didn'twant people just to want to know
me because my dad was anastronaut and they thought that
was cool.
There was a lot more.
There is a lot more to me thanthat and for a while I went a
(19:25):
little quiet with it.
And then, through healing andcounseling and growth and
reflecting, I feel much moreexcited to share about that
because I've seen the ways thatGod has worked through the grief
and joy.
I've had joy in the midst of mygrief too.
(19:47):
It's it's.
I wouldn't trade my story.
I know it's been given to me.
I didn't ask for it, but I'mthankful for what he's done
through it and there's.
I don't feel defined by it, butit's very much part of part of
what I am today.
Speaker 1 (20:06):
So I'm going to ask
this question of did you ask why
?
Maybe to NASA or something, buteven to God, and I think that's
what my, my bigger question isis because, specifically, you
have a why, but I think ingeneral, when any of us are
grieving or going throughsomething, it's easy or we want
(20:26):
to find an answer from God,right, like, why is this
happening?
God and you know this sort ofthing, and I think sometimes he
gives us that and sometimes hedoesn't, which has right.
So I guess that's kind of my,my reasoning for the question of
of did you ask why, either toGod or to you know, people
(20:49):
higher up, and did you get ananswer?
Does that make sense?
Speaker 2 (20:54):
Yes, that's, I think.
I feel that question so deeply.
I think that's at the core ofall of us.
The question why Right?
Speaker 1 (21:07):
exactly.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
I think we all
desperately want to know why
certain things have happened.
And if it could have just gonedifferent, why could it have
gone a different way?
Have just gone different?
Like, why couldn't it have gonea different way?
(21:30):
And, yes, nasa did admit fault,so I, in that sense.
They did do the accident reportand they found out what was
wrong and, and you know, waysthat the NASA culture needed to
improve and that aspect, but itwasn't going to bring my dad
back.
So it's still like, why then?
(21:50):
Why that crew?
Why my dad?
And it's making me think ofanother question right now.
Think of another question rightnow.
It's if I, the closer I get toknow Jesus, we can also ask the
question why did he die for us?
It's just kind of it's.
There are things about thegospel that are bewildering,
(22:13):
just like our life.
It doesn't make sense why, whywould God send his son to die
for us when we didn't deserve asecond chance, we didn't deserve
that closeness with him, andyet he did it anyways out of
love for us?
And so it's just making methink of that question, which
(22:36):
makes me so thankful and givesme the hope for the wise that I
don't know, such as why?
Why would this happen right now?
But I have to trust that Godknows more than I do and I don't
think God's heart or the coreof who he is intends for us to
(22:59):
endure deep pain.
It's not how the world wasmeant to go.
But he can use those moments toto bring more people to him and
beauty from ashes, redemptivethings from it, and I feel like
in in different ways.
(23:20):
I've heard people's stories ofhearing that they heard about my
dad and what a great dad he wasand husband and and now they
want to be a better dad andhusband and follow God.
And those little moments helpfill in the why question for me.
Obviously, I'd rather if Icould give my dad a hug and see
(23:43):
him.
I would love that.
But I also am so thankful Iknow I will see him again and I
just have to trust that this wasthe way God planned it to go.
It's not out of God's control,even if it feels out of control
to me that's really you know.
Speaker 1 (24:03):
you were saying how.
You said like why would Jesuscome, you know, and and give
himself on the cross for us andcome back to life?
And I was just thinking I'vebeen reading in Deuteronomy and
before they're going to go intothe promised land, and Moses is
kind of going over again, likethese are the commands you know,
(24:26):
follow the commands.
And like you will be blessed oryou will be cursed.
And then, before Moses dies,god says they're not going to do
it, they're going to, they'regoing to go to idols, they're
going to do this.
And and that's the exact samething.
It's like he, he told him thatI love you, I want you to keep
my commands, and I know you'renot going to, you know.
And so that kind of made melike the why of, like wow, what
(24:50):
a, what a loving God that hewould know our hearts and know
that we're going to makemistakes and that we're going to
fall away over and over.
And he still says, okay, I'llsend my son for you.
Speaker 2 (25:05):
Yeah it, it's
bewildering grace really it's.
It's doesn't make sense and ina way that helps make sense of
those things that don't makesense that don't make sense,
right?
Speaker 1 (25:24):
oh, that's so
beautiful.
Yeah, I love that.
I love that.
Well, you kind of said a fewtimes like that you're excited
to share your the story, or kindof excited to share about your
dad.
Is there anything that youyou're like I do want to share
this or I do want to say this?
Speaker 2 (25:39):
Yeah, I think, as
I've walked grief for with my
dad and many others for 21 years, there is beauty in it, there's
a lot of unseen in it, thatjust to encourage those who are
walking through grief, those whoare walking through grief that
(26:06):
just I mean, and that you'veprobably heard it maybe, but the
name of God, the God who sees,he does see us in those dark
moments, and sometimes thosemoments end up being really
amazing, new moments of intimacywith God and ways that you
didn't maybe understand.
(26:26):
A characteristic of God, and now, because you need him in that
way, you're asking him to besomething to you that you didn't
ask him to be to you before,such for me like a father to the
fatherless and being a providerin different ways, being my joy
(26:48):
in the pain.
There's things that we startasking God to be, that he has
always been, but we weren'tlooking or asking for, and so I
think there's something veryrich and deep in that that you
find, even in the midst of thosebehind closed doors crying, no
(27:10):
one sees and it's place.
There are beautiful thingshappening and things that are
being built and made, and, and Ilove also, a counselor of mine
(27:33):
told me that grief.
Grief is progressive, it as weprocess.
It's not that we're stuck, likeif we cry again or if we have
something trigger emotion again.
It's not that we're stuckforever on it, it's it's a new,
progressive processing of of Godhealing us, and I think that
(27:59):
really encouraged me that Ididn't have to fail.
I wasn't failing at grieving ifI had a new aspect of or new
layer that I needed to process,and I still do.
There's different things that Iprocess in my grief now, 21
years later, you know so itchanges as you go.
(28:19):
It's not a linear thing.
Speaker 1 (28:22):
That's good.
Well, I appreciate you sharingsome of your story.
I mean, we're just getting aglimpse of of who you are and um
for sharing.
But I always love to wrap upwith a few questions.
So if I could ask those, sure,what is your favorite Bible
verse or story?
Speaker 2 (28:45):
Proverbs 3, 5, and 6
has been an ongoing verse for my
family and I.
My dad wrote it on hislithographs, his astronaut
pictures and it's trust in theLord with all your heart, do not
lean on your own understandingand all your ways, acknowledge
(29:11):
him and he will make your pathstraight.
And, man, no matter what phaseof life you're going through, it
just rings true.
It's trusting in him and not inour own understanding, and it's
it's a daily thing to rememberand it always helps me redirect
and figure out where my aimshould be.
And that's back to God, nottrying to figure it out myself
or make sense even of those whysthat we were talking about, but
(29:35):
trust that he has theunderstanding I don't and he
will make it good, he will makeit straight that's good.
Speaker 1 (29:43):
That's actually
probably if I had to pick like a
verse that's spoken to methroughout my entire life, I
feel like that might have beenlike one of the first ones that
I really like latched on to andthen it's never let go of.
Speaker 2 (29:57):
Right, it's so good.
Yeah, every stage of life.
I love that about scripturethat it speaks to you no matter
what season you're in it,something new pops up from it
because it's living and active.
Speaker 1 (30:08):
Yeah, what are you
grateful for?
Speaker 2 (30:14):
So many things.
It's, yeah, the more gratefulyou are, the more things you
think of.
Think is how that works, whichis pretty amazing.
It's contagious.
So I'm grateful that God hasgiven me hope every single day
(30:35):
when I lack grace, to havediscipline in different areas of
my life.
That's something I've beenlearning in the past year just
discipline.
I'm thankful for opportunitiesto connect with others and share
our stories and that God usesstory to give others hope and
(31:00):
that it's not lost when we, whenwe lose like our story still
has value in it.
It can connect and give othershope.
Yeah, and I'm thankful for myfamily.
I'm we're very, very close tothis day and God really expanded
it to my mom remarried when,five years later, to a widower,
(31:25):
my stepdad Bill, and so I'mthankful that God expanded our
family in some ways, in somebeautiful ways.
Speaker 1 (31:34):
I love that and I
love how you said about stories,
because that's why I'm doingwhat we're doing and that's why
I'm so grateful that you and somany have come on to share your
stories, so that you can inspireand encourage others and and
just also bring the kingdom ofGod a little bit further and
further, just by sharing howGod's been working in our lives.
Speaker 2 (31:56):
Yes, yeah, I love
your title.
It's the fact that we'reordinary people and God's doing
extraordinary things through usand it's we don't even really
know how he works in thosethings.
We can trust that he is doingbigger things than than we have
the tools for.
Speaker 1 (32:14):
Yeah, and what
kindness have you shown, or what
kindness have you seen in thelast week?
Speaker 2 (32:23):
or what kindness have
you seen in the last week?
I recently got acquainted witha film studio in Houston called
For the One, and they have beengenerously hosting some
different events.
I'm a film and stage actor, butthey've been fostering
community and using their what,their resources, to basically
(32:48):
foster community in Houston in away that I've never seen and
I've benefited from that thispast week and just seeing the
beautiful ways that if you opena door with your resources, it's
just cool what God does withthat.
So I've I've I've benefitedfrom the kindness of someone
opening their door and and usingtheir resources for good oh, I
love that.
(33:09):
That's so good well, yeah, it's,it's.
It's fun to to see how peopleare working in your city
together too.
Speaker 1 (33:19):
It's an exciting
thing yeah, yeah, and that's why
I kind of end with these thingsis because I think we need a
little bit more gratefulness anda little bit more kindness in
the world.
And what better way to do itand to keep remembering it?
Right, like just what you saidthe more I, the more I think I'm
grateful.
The more I remembergratefulness, the more I am
grateful.
(33:39):
So I just don't know if wecould have enough of that.
Speaker 2 (33:43):
Yeah, it's a great
multiplier that doesn't have any
negative effects by having moreof it.
Speaker 1 (33:50):
Yeah Well, Laura, I
love getting to know you a
little bit more.
Thank you for being on.
Speaker 2 (33:57):
Oh, it's been a joy.
Thank you so much for lettingme be here, share my story and
get to know you more as well,thank you.
Speaker 1 (34:07):
Thank you for
listening to Ordinary People,
extraordinary Things, where yourstory is His glory.
We will be back in two weekswith a brand new podcast.
In the meantime, check out allof the other seasons, seasons
one through four, for all of thestories of faith and hope.