Dr. Demento, the iconic radio personality who brought us five decades of musical oddities and launched Weird Al Yankovic's career, is hanging up his top hat. At 84 years old, Barrett Hansen (Dr. Demento's real name) has announced his retirement after nearly 55 years of broadcasting novelty songs to delighted audiences worldwide.
Looking out from my studio windows into the beautiful Northern California foothills, I reflect on the enormous impact this quirky broadcaster had on American pop culture. Dr. Demento didn't just play strange songs – he created an entire community around musical curiosities that mainstream radio wouldn't touch. From "Monster Mash" to "They're Coming to Take Me Away" to "Fish Heads," these tracks became cultural touchstones largely because one man believed novelty music deserved airtime.
The second half of this episode ventures into decidedly explicit territory as we explore some of broadcasting's most infamous meltdowns. Tommy Lasorda's legendary response when asked about Dave Kingman's three home runs against the Dodgers leads the pack, followed by Earl Weaver's shockingly profane "Manager's Corner" segment. We also revisit Bobby Knight's halftime fury, Chris Berman losing his cool when people walked in front of his camera, and Casey Kasem's iconic "ponderous" outburst when forced to transition from an upbeat song to a dedication about a dead pet.
These unfiltered moments reveal what happens when the polished veneer of broadcasting cracks under pressure – moments of raw authenticity that have become part of media folklore. From baseball managers to beloved radio personalities, no one is immune to the occasional explosive outburst when pushed to their limits.
Have you ever heard Dr. Demento's show or encountered one of these infamous broadcasting moments? Share your memories and let me know which novelty song still gets stuck in your head after all these years!
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:20):
we are back.
It is a thursday and this, myfriends, is of 300 peeps, our
Pat's Peeps podcast.
Happy Thursday to ya.
I'm Patrick, the host of thePat Walsh Show on KPK Radio, 7
to 10 pm, monday through Friday,except for last night where we
had technical glitches.
But today, on this Thursday, Ilook out my studio windows into
(00:43):
the beautiful foothills ofNorthern California.
My friends, the sun's shining,a little bit of a breeze, but
it's going to be hot.
There's no doubt it's going tobe a hot one.
Happy summer to you, whereveryou are.
Thank you so much for listeningto my podcast.
Very, very much appreciate you.
Thank you for listening to myradio show as well today.
(01:04):
Part two of our experimentcursing versus no cursing Audio
bites, sound bites from the past.
Yesterday we featured soundbites that you know what?
Hey, no cursing, hilarious,memorable, some of them just
fascinating A lady calling in onherself for drunk driving.
(01:25):
Not necessarily funny, but justso fascinating.
You don't hear that very often.
But again, we're trying to seewhat people may enjoy or maybe
not enjoy, but between cursingand non-cursing soundbites.
It's just a little experimentI'm conducting here on the Pat's
Peeps Number 290.
(01:47):
So today I'm just going to letyou know I've got a dedication.
I want to talk about someonewho I really admire, and then
we're going to get into somesoundbites, which, again, I
don't believe in triggerwarnings.
I think that's weak.
But I mean, if I were intotrigger warnings I would have
triggered that.
We played yesterday thatsocialist communist conference
(02:08):
in Sacramento which is soembarrassing, but I don't really
do that.
So you so at some point?
I'm just warning you that ontwo 90, I'm not going to curse,
but I'm going to play soundbiteswith bites.
That is loaded with cursingOver the top cursing and anger.
All right, so there's yourwarning.
(02:31):
So if you want to tune outafter my initial discussion here
, okay, but then you'll miss outon all the cursing.
I'm just telling you it's superfun Anyhow.
So here on Pat's peeps 290, Iwant to let you know that a
(02:52):
radio legend is going to retire.
It's not me, but man, I lovethis guy.
Dr demento is his name.
You know, dr demento.
His real name is barrett hansen, but he's world.
He's known worldwide Dr Demento.
His real name is Barrett Hanson, but he's known worldwide as Dr
Demento.
This guy turns people on tonovelty songs.
He's been doing this for 55years, more than 55 years had
(03:12):
this show.
It's amazing, known worldwidenovelty records, goofy songs, I
mean he's going to hang up hisiconic top hat now.
He announces retirement at theend of his most recent episode
of his long-running show,wrapped up the top 10 countdown,
delivered a specialannouncement to his listeners.
(03:34):
He says I'm 84 now.
I've been doing this for nearly55 years.
I guess just under 55 years,about two-thirds of his life.
He said.
And I get that.
I mean I've been at the radiostation, I'm at for a long time,
like half of my life.
He said it's been a blast.
I've come to the decision Ineed to hang up my top hat soon.
And so what you just heard ismy last show, last of my regular
(03:57):
shows.
To me that's the key regularshows because he may want to do
some other things.
You know, maybe he wants to doa show now and then and he's not
completely hanging it up.
But the Dr Demento show willcontinue until October.
Most of the upcoming episodesare going to be pulled from the
show's archive.
They're going to include recaps, rebroadcasts, classic episodes
(04:18):
, just like what happened on myshow last night, unfortunately
because we had technical issueslast night.
But the show's final episodewill coincide with its 55th
anniversary of its first episodeand fittingly it will be doing
the top 40 countdown of noveltysongs.
The doctor, dr Demento,introduced so many of us to
(04:42):
these novelty records.
You know he did a lot of DickieGoodman.
I first heard Dickie Goodman onAM radio, though, but he did a
show in Pasadena and hecollected these novelty records.
He worked up these humoroussongs, worked them into these
playlists.
He got a bunch of positivereactions from this.
Thus the Dr Demento show wasborn and became legendary,
(05:07):
introducing us to countlessnovelty songs, some of the ones
like the Monster Mash by BobbyBoris Pickett that's become a
staple over the years.
Everyone knows that song EveryHalloween that's the first one
that's dusted off and played.
That song every halloweenthat's the first one that's
dusted off and played.
(05:28):
But he um, he also introducedus to a lot of other classics.
Here's dr demento in actionwind up your radio.
Speaker 2 (05:41):
I'm dr defensa, with mad music and crazy comedy from
out the vaults and off the wallRare records and outrageous
tapes from yesterday, today andtomorrow.
This week we'll have a saluteto the demented year 1986, with
some great comedy hits that madetheir debut that year and a
couple we haven't heard sincethen.
Whimsical Will will have hisannual salute to the big summer
(06:02):
monster movie always a highlight.
Jessica Will will have hisannual salute to the big summer
monster movie always a highlight.
Got a lot of very demented newsongs and lots of old favorites
by request.
Now we usually play this one atHalloween, but I thought, heck,
june can be a scary time ofyear too.
We're playing it this week forJason in Great Falls and Ryan in
Rochelle.
Speaker 4 (06:25):
Here's Flippy T Fishhead.
There's a full moon in thepasture tonight.
Hangs like a fine and polishedpearl, so pure and white.
The average guy finds so muchbeauty in its life.
But I'm a werecow.
Moo, moo, moo.
I'm a werecow and I'm aware DrDemento in action.
Speaker 1 (07:21):
So these would be like old.
These are kind of deep songsthat unless you were listening
to Dr Demento, you probablywould have never heard.
But then he introduced us to alot of songs that became
classics like this one.
Speaker 5 (07:38):
Remember when you ran away and I got on my knees and
begged you not to leave becauseI'd go berserk.
Speaker 6 (07:54):
Well, you left me anyhow, and then the days got
worse and worse, and now you seeI've gone completely out of my
mind they're coming to take meaway.
Speaker 5 (08:00):
Haha, they're coming to take me away.
Oh, hee-hee, ha ha.
To the funny farm where life isbeautiful.
Speaker 8 (08:04):
All the time To the funny farm where life is
beautiful all the time and I'llbe happy to see those nice young
men in their clean white coatsand they're coming to take me
away.
Speaker 1 (08:11):
Napoleon 14 on the Dr Demento show.
And so you laughed.
Speaker 6 (08:16):
You laughed when I had said that losing you would
make me flip my lid.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
Right, right.
That became very popular, thatsong.
A lot of people have heard thatone, a lot of people know that
one and a lot of people wereexposed to that because, again,
of Dr Demento Dr Demento also,by the way.
Many people don't realize this,but he kick-started Weird Al
(08:46):
Yankovic's career by playing hisearly songs and now Weird Al is
everywhere.
He's become a you know, a big,big artist.
And as a teenager, weird Althen known as Al maybe he was
known as Weird Al amongst hisfriends.
But he began sending thesehomemade tapes of his songs to
Dr Demento because he knew thatDr Demento was the guy that
(09:10):
appreciated novelty tunes, funnytunes.
And the doctor found a certaincharm in the accordion-powered
little songs that Al wouldrecord on a cheap cassette
player in his own bedroom and hegave it to him for his first
airplay.
And songs like his very firstsong, which very few people may
(09:36):
know, but this is calledBelvedere Cruising I can take
you anywhere.
Speaker 4 (09:40):
I'm a 1964 Belvedere is called Belvedere.
Speaker 1 (09:41):
Cruising.
I can take you anywhere.
I'm a 1964.
Speaker 4 (09:42):
Belvedere Go a Belvedere cruising tonight 1976.
Speaker 1 (09:55):
Enough.
Of course, I don't own therights to this amazingly great
song or any of these songs.
So he did that one, BelvedereCruising.
Then he later did this one andplayed this on the air.
And this one was done in amen's bathroom, as I recall, a
(10:18):
public restroom, my bologna.
Well, to be honest with you,this one was a done in a men's
restroom, but he did one whereit was just the accordion.
I played that on yesterday'spodcast, but he also shared this
(10:41):
one with us.
Another one rides the bus WeirdAl Dr Demento, the Dr Demento
Show.
I love the deep voice guy.
(11:03):
Yeah, yeah, I love it.
(11:32):
So we'll talk more about DrDemento on my radio show tonight
, talk about his radio career,how he got his syndication
started and everything you know.
He was also responsible.
This song kind of caught on,didn't it a little bit?
Shaving Cream this was an oldsong that he dusted off for the
(11:55):
show.
I have a sad story to tell you.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
It may hurt your feelings a bit.
Speaker 1 (12:01):
So this is Dr Demento singing Shaving Cream.
Speaker 2 (12:06):
Last night I went into my bathroom and I stepped
in a big pile of shaving cream.
Be nice and clean.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
Shave every day and you'll always look keen.
Remember this.
Speaker 2 (12:24):
Here we are in this fine, yummy coffee joint.
I hate to be picking a net, buthey, dude, I ordered Cafe Latte
Supreme and you brought me acup full of shaving cream.
Speaker 1 (12:46):
That's the good doctor now those were.
Those were songs that maybe if,even if you were sort of a
surface dr demento fan or if youdidn't even know dr demento,
you may possibly could haveheard those songs, especially
they're coming to take me awayNapoleon 14.
But when I tell you he had someweird songs that he played I
(13:08):
mean weird.
He did deep, well, fish heads.
I talked about that yesterday.
Billy Mummy from Lost in Space,barnes and Barnes did fish
heads.
That's why the world wasexposed to that crazy song.
But speaking of weird, itdoesn't get much weirder than
this from Dr Demento.
I had this record.
(13:29):
It had all these songs on there.
I got weird.
Every time I see you, I gotweird.
Speaker 6 (13:38):
Want to find a place to bite you.
I got weird.
I want to find a place to biteyou.
I got weird when I found outyou don't like me.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
I got weird Because you know that you excite me
Sitting in my little room.
It's weird that I have to findsomething obscene to do.
I know all the lyrics to thisweird song Louise off
butterflies, salt some snailsand watch them bubble bubble,
(14:07):
bubble, bubble bubble.
That's my demented head becauseof Dr Demento.
Speaker 11 (14:11):
Oh.
Speaker 1 (14:22):
And just when you think, God, that's the weirdest
song of all time, is it Becausemaybe you haven't heard from the
good doctor?
My name is not Merv Griffin.
Speaker 4 (14:31):
Now people stop me often and ask if I'm Merv
Griffin.
But I don't even know him.
I've never seen his show.
Now, everybody loves him.
What would they do without him?
They ask me all about him.
I'm Merv.
Speaker 1 (14:52):
Griffin, and I don't even know him.
Here it goes, my friends,beware.
Trigger warning.
Trigger warning, triggertrigger, trigger warning.
Speaker 4 (15:01):
Yeah, his name is not Merv Griffin.
His name is not Merv Griffin.
His name is not Merv Griffin.
Speaker 1 (15:06):
His real name is George.
Speaker 4 (15:09):
They think that they all know me.
They tell me I'm the body.
They want to touch my body.
They want to go to bed.
They give me pens and pencils.
They give me candy apples.
They want to see my nipples.
I wish that they were dead.
His name is not Merv Griffin.
His name is not Merv Griffin.
His name is not Merv Griffin.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
His real name is George Try being in Italy and
having that song looping in yourhead as an earworm, good Lord,
it will almost drive you insane.
I'll finish Pat's Peeps 290with another one of the
(15:50):
favorites from the Good DrDemento Show, and we'll talk
about that on my show tonightand we'll get way deeper into it
.
Now, my friends, comes theportion of the show, the podcast
, pat's Peeps 290, that youeither want to hear the
following cursing or you do not.
All right, it is at this pointthat not for me, but we play
(16:20):
audio part two.
Audio bites part two.
Perhaps some of the selectionsI have chosen have been bleeped.
Audio Bites Part 2.
Perhaps some of the selectionsI have chosen have been bleeped.
I didn't even check that.
But either way we're going toplay it and either way they're
filthy, okay, filthy.
So just know that.
Proceed at your own risk.
(16:42):
Sign your consent form.
Now we're going to start offcursing soundbites from the past
with my all-time favoritedodger well tied, by the way.
Neither tommy lasorda.
I'm just going to say that vinsScully is my other favorite.
I don't want to get too muchado deep into baseball.
Tommy Lasorda was asked May 14,1978, about Dave Kingman's
(17:07):
three home runs against LA.
Speaker 6 (17:12):
Can you give us just a few basic?
Speaker 8 (17:13):
comments about your feelings on the game.
Well, naturally I feel badabout losing a ballgame like
that.
There's no way you should losethat ballgame.
That just doesn't make sense.
What's your opinion ofKingman's performance?
What's my opinion of Kingman'sperformance?
What the f*** do you think ismy opinion of it?
I think it was f***ing, f***ing, f***ing.
(17:34):
Put that in, I don't f***ingOpinion of his performance.
F***ing, f***ing beat us withthree home runs.
What the f*** do you mean?
What is my opinion of hisperformance?
How can you ask me a questionlike that?
What is my opinion of hisperformance?
F***, he hit three home runs.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
Oh, they're bleeping it, they're bleeping it, I'm
f***ed off to lose the f***inggame.
Speaker 8 (17:57):
And you ask me my opinion of his performance.
That's alright, off to lose thegame.
And you asked me my opinion ofthis performance all right, well
, that's a tough question to askme, isn't it?
What is my opinion of hisperformance?
Yes, it is.
I asked it and you gave me ananswer.
Well, I didn't give you a goodanswer because I'm mad, but I
mean that wasn't a good question.
That's a tough question to askme right now what is my opinion
(18:18):
of his performance.
I mean you want me now what ismy opinion of his performance?
I mean you want me to tell youwhat my opinion of his
performance is.
You just did that's right.
The guy hits three home runs agame.
You just did, yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:33):
Now all right.
Well, that got beeped, doggoneit.
That's all right.
Though I love Tommy Lasorda, hetold it like it was Now the
next two.
I do not believe this is goingto be bleeped, and this made
Tommy LaSorda's reaction seemcalm and somewhat decent.
(18:56):
Let's stick with managers.
Let's go back to 1970.
Oh my God, I'm not even goingto play the entire thing because
it gets really crude, but noone was more fired up, I should
say, than Baltimore Oriolesmanager Earl Weaver crude, but
no one was more fired fired up,I should say than baltimore
oriole's manager, earl weaver.
Here he is, on manager's corner.
Speaker 7 (19:18):
Here we go and now to the manager's corner with earl
weaver hi everybody.
Speaker 5 (19:24):
This is earl weaver with manager's corner.
Today I have tom marr Moore,Oreo broadcaster, back on the
show and I understand Tom's beengetting some mail with
questions that supposedly I cananswer.
Now what the fuck are some ofthese goddamn questions, Tom?
Speaker 7 (19:40):
Well, first of all, earl George Moore from Baltimore
is asking how much we feel theloss of Don Stanhouse.
Speaker 5 (19:47):
Well, don Stanhouse was an asshole.
He had us in trouble, had thefucking bases loaded God damn it
almost every fucking time hewent out there.
He liked to ruin my healthsmoking cigarettes, and thank
God we got Timmy Stoddard comingin on the bullpen right now
sticking a bat up their asses,and that's what it takes.
Speaker 7 (20:04):
Well, bill Whitehouse Earl that certainly is an
answer from Frederick Merrillwants to know why you and the
Orioles don't go out and getsome more team speed Team speed,
for Christ's sake.
Speaker 5 (20:13):
You get fucking goddamn little fleas on the
fucking bases getting picked offtrying to steal, getting thrown
out, taking runs away from you.
You get them big cocksuckersthat can hit the fucking ball
out of the ballpark and youcan't make any goddamn mistake.
Speaker 7 (20:26):
Well, certainly this show is going to get out in
history.
Earl Terry Elliott ofWashington DC wants to know why
you don't use Terry Crowley as adesignated hitter.
Yeah, what about that?
Speaker 5 (20:35):
Terry Crowley's lucky .
He's in fucking baseball, forChrist's sake.
He was released by theCincinnati Reds.
He was released by the fuckinggoddamn Atlanta Braves.
We thought that Terry Crowleycould sit on his fucking ass for
eight innings and enjoywatching a baseball game just
like any other fan, and has theability to get up there and
break one open in the fuckingninth.
So if this cocksucker'd mindhis own business and let me
(20:55):
manage the fucking team, we'd bea lot better off well,
certainly you've made youropinions known on the fans
questions about baseball earl.
Speaker 7 (21:02):
But let's get to something else.
Alice sweet from norfolk wantsto know the best time to put in
a tomato plant okay, so I'm.
Speaker 1 (21:08):
I'm going to stop it right there because he gets a
little crude about that.
I'll let him talk baseball likethat, but I'm not going to play
this.
Even that's too much for me.
Meanwhile, sticking one morewith the managers in Major
League Baseball, here is theChicago Cubs' Lee Ilya manager.
Cubs manager Lee Ilya and hisinfamous tirade, april 29th 1983
(21:33):
.
Man, this is the Cubs managerand he's talking smack about the
Cub fans.
Speaker 3 (21:40):
I hope we get fucking hotter than shit just to stuff
it up them 3,000 fucking peoplethat show up every fucking day,
up every fucking day, because ifthey're the real Chicago
fucking fans, they can kiss myfucking ass right downtown and
print it.
They're really, really behindyou around here, my fucking ass.
(22:01):
What the fuck am I supposed todo?
Go out there and let my fuckingplayers get destroyed every day
and be quiet about it?
For the fucking nickel-dimepeople to show up?
The motherfuckers don't evenwork.
That's why they're out at thefucking game.
They only go out and get afucking job and find out what
it's like to go out there andfucking live it.
(22:21):
85 percent of the fuckingworld's working.
The other 15 come out here.
A fucking playground for thecocksuckers.
Rip them, motherfuckers.
Rip them cocky cocksuckers.
Rip them motherfuckers.
Speaker 1 (22:35):
Rip them cocksuckers like the fucking players.
Skipper, I got a question.
Speaker 3 (22:38):
Those guys busting their fucking ass and them
fucking people poo, and that'sthe cunts, my fucking ass.
They talk about the greatfucking support that the players
get around here.
I haven't seen it this fuckingyear.
The name of the game is hit theball, catch the ball and get
(22:58):
the fucking job done.
Right now we have more lossesthan we have wins.
The fucking changes that havehappened in the Cub organization
are multifold.
All right, they don't showbecause we're 5-14.
And unfortunately that's thecriteria of them, dumb 15
motherfucking percent that comeout to date baseball.
(23:18):
The other 85% are earning aliving.
It'll take more than a 5-13 ora 5-14 to destroy the makeup of
this club.
I guarantee you that there'ssome fucking pros out there that
want to fucking of this club.
I'll guarantee you that there'ssome fucking pros out there
that want to fucking play thisgame.
But you're stuck in a fuckingstigma of the fucking Dodgers
(23:39):
and the Phillies and theCardinals and all that cheap
shit, all these motherfuckingeditorials about, say, and
fucking the Philly-itis, and allthat shit.
Speaker 1 (23:51):
That's sickening, it's unbelievable I'm gonna
leave it at that.
I think you get his point.
Now, speaking of guys in chargebobby knight everyone knows
bobby knight out of temper.
Bobby Knight everyone knowsBobby Knight out of temper.
Rest in peace, bobby Knight, ifyou can.
(24:14):
Man, I wonder you know if he'sup there in heaven if he's
ranting like this, because herehe is at halftime of a
basketball game.
Bobby Knight, ladies andgentlemen, on Pat's Peeps 290.
What a poison.
Speaker 10 (24:28):
I'm getting the fuck out of here.
I mean, if you're not going torecover Greg Graham, if you're
just going to let him drive byyou, if the rest of you are
going to let him catch the balloutside the three-second lane
and drive all the way in herewithout one guy challenging him,
then I'm leaving and youfucking guys will run until you
can't even suffer.
(24:49):
Now I'm tired of this shit.
Now I'm tired of this shit.
I'm sick and fucking tired ofan 8 and 10 record.
I'm fucking tired of losing toPurdue.
I'm not here to fuck aroundthis week.
Now you may be, but I'm not.
Now I'm going to fuckingguarantee you that if we don't
(25:09):
play up there Monday night,you're not going to believe the
next four fucking day.
Now I am not here to get my assbeat on Monday.
Now you better fuckingunderstand that right now.
This is absolute fuckingbullshit.
Now I'll fucking run your assright into the ground.
I mean I'll fucking run you.
You'll think last night was afucking picnic.
I had to sit around for afucking year with an 8 and 10
record in this fucking lake andI mean you will not put me in
(25:31):
that fucking position again, oryou will goddamn pay for it like
you can't fucking believe.
Now you better get your headout of your ass Bobby Knight.
Speaker 1 (25:50):
Meanwhile, do not.
Whatever you do, you know Ilove Chris Berman on ESPN.
I love when he and Tom Jacksonwould do the football highlights
.
But whatever you do, do notwalk in front of Chris Berman's
camera when he's getting readyto broadcast.
Speaker 11 (26:05):
I'm doing TV and I got 18.
God damn it.
Can't everybody stop for 10minutes?
I mean, everybody seems thatthat's the only Everybody.
Can we stick Jesus Christ?
I mean it's not that much toask, Is that when everybody has
to move?
When I'm trying to concentrateJesus, and you guys thought I
was a pain in the ass, I'm sorry.
I mean that's so rude.
I can't believe that that's.
(26:26):
It's so goddamn rude.
Speaker 1 (26:27):
I didn't mean to Chris.
Speaker 11 (26:29):
Why does everyone all of a sudden have to move?
You've got two fucking hours tomove around.
Wait ten minutes.
Speaker 1 (26:34):
I was itching.
Speaker 11 (26:36):
Jesus, I'm sorry to explode by you, but it's like no
one's ever worked on TV herebefore Jesus.
Speaker 1 (26:48):
It happens to the best of them, man.
Speaker 11 (26:50):
Best of us.
What the fuck do they think I'm?
Speaker 2 (26:54):
doing.
Speaker 11 (26:59):
I actually can't believe what I just saw, not now
.
It's like no one here hasworked on TV before.
Oh jeez, I hear a dial tone andthere were seven people.
I mean Jesus, we need to usethe studio for 15 fucking
(27:21):
minutes, just everybody, youknow.
Speaker 1 (27:25):
As I say, it happens to the best of them.
You know, listen, things havehappened to me.
They were very frustrating.
I never aired it out like youknow, like that, but you know,
sometimes you get frustratedPeople.
You would never expect CaseyKasem America's Top 40.
Or America Top 40.
(27:46):
You remember, I love that showman.
He was so smooth the tone inhis voice.
Speaker 12 (27:54):
This is a classic Casey Kasem meltdown, the
countdown will begin this Sundayafternoon at 1, right here on
the radio station you grew upwith.
Speaker 4 (28:01):
Music radio 138.
Speaker 12 (28:03):
Oh fuck, what the hell is going on here.
Geez.
Well, isn't this the last hour?
We got another hour to do?
Geez, I thought we were almostfinished.
Good golly, miss Molly Boy,this is fucking ponderous man.
Ponderous, fucking ponderous.
Hi, this is Casey Kasem.
American Top 40 has moved to anew time.
I hope you'll join me thisSaturday morning and every
(28:25):
Saturday morning at 2, 2.
We're up to our long-distancededication, and this one is
about kids and pets and asituation that we can all
understand, whether we have kidsor pets or neither.
It's from a man in Cincinnati,ohio, and here's what he writes
Dear Casey, this may seem to bea strange dedication request,
(28:45):
but I'm quite sincere and it'llmean a lot if you play it.
Recently there was a death inour family.
He was a little dog namedSnuggles, but he was most
certainly a part of let's startagain.
Uh-oh, I'm coming out of therecord.
Oh, boy, play the record, okay.
Uh-oh, okay, please.
Yes, sir, see, when you comeout of those up-tempo goddamn
(29:07):
numbers, man, it See, when youcome out of those up-tempo
goddamn numbers, man, it'simpossible to make those
transitions.
And then you got to go intosomebody dying.
You know they do this to me allthe time.
I don't know what the hell theydo it for, but goddamn it if we
can't come out of a slow record.
I don't understand it.
Is Don on the phone?
Okay, I hope not.
(29:30):
I want a goddamn concertedeffort to come out of a record
that isn't a fucking up-temporecord.
Every time I do a goddamn deathdedication, now make it.
And I also want to know whathappened to the pictures I was
supposed to see this week.
This is the last goddamn time Iwant somebody to use his
fucking brain to not come out ofa goddamn record that's
up-tempo.
And I got to talk about afucking dog dying.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
A classic from Casey.
How about we get to somethingaway from the world of
entertainment?
How about this?
Yesterday I played a 911 callwhich was not exactly funny, as
I mentioned before, it was alady calling in on herself who
was drunk.
She called 911 to reportherself driving drunk, which you
(30:10):
never hear On today's Pat'sPeeps 290, the cursing audio.
This is a classic 911 call.
Man hits a deer, deer bites him, thought he was dead.
I need a bamboolance.
Speaker 9 (30:27):
The ambulance emergency line.
Do you have an emergency?
I need a bamboolance.
Who?
Ambulance emergency line.
Do you have an emergency?
I need a Bambalance.
Who is this?
Joe?
Okay, joe, where do you need us?
I'm in the motherfucking phonebooth, okay.
What's the address there?
Hold on, okay, sir.
Did you call 3911?
No, okay, joe, I need alocation.
(30:49):
What street are you on?
I'm in a motherfucking phonebooth at the stop and go.
That's it.
I'm at the motherfucking stopand go.
Speaker 1 (30:57):
They did little bleeps on this.
Speaker 9 (30:58):
Pretty good Let me tell you what.
I'm going down themotherfucking road, driving my
car, minding my own goddamnbusiness, and a motherfucking
deer jumped out and hit my car.
Okay, sir, are you injured?
Let me tell you, I get out andpick the moth deer up.
I thought he's dead.
I put the moth deer in my backseat and I'm driving down the
(31:22):
moth road and minding my ownbusiness.
The moth woke up and bit me inthe back of my god.
They bit me and then kicked theshit out of my car.
I'm in the motherfucking phonebooth.
The deer bit me in the neck.
A big motherfucking dog came upand bit me in the leg.
I hit him with themotherfucking tire iron and I
stabbed him.
Speaker 4 (31:43):
I stabbed him with my knife, so I got a hurt leg and
the motherfucking deer bit me inthe neck and the dog wanted me
out of.
Speaker 9 (31:49):
The motherfucking deer bit me in the neck and the
dog wanted me out of my fuckingphone booth because he wants the
deer.
Now, who gets the deer, me orthe dog?
Okay, sir, are you injured?
Yeah, a motherfucking deer bitme in the neck.
Speaker 1 (32:01):
Hold on, hold on now, uh-oh.
Speaker 9 (32:04):
Look out, uh-oh, the motherfucking dog is biting me.
Hold on, god damn it, get outof here.
Hold the moth-fucking dog islaying me.
Speaker 1 (32:14):
Hold on, God damn it, Get out of here.
The moth-fucking dog is layingmy ass.
I hope he gets a Bambalancesoon.
We're going to finish this oneoff my friends here on Batch
Peeps 2.90.
Going back to Dr Demento and aclassic.
This is Classy Freddy Blassie.
It's a song called Pencil NeckGeek.
(32:35):
Here we go, ladies andgentlemen.
Speaker 8 (32:37):
That's Peeps 290.
Speaker 6 (32:41):
Thank you.
Back when I was a kid, life wasgoing swell Till something
happened, blew everything tohell.
That night my daddy stumbled inall pale and weak, said a woman
up the block just gave birth toa geek.
Mom said sell it to the circus.
What the heck dad said nope,this one's a pencil neck.
(33:05):
And if there's one thing lowerthan a sideshow freak, it's a
gritty, scum-sucking pencil-neckgeek.
You see, if you take a pencilthat won't hold lead, looks like
a pipe cleaner, that's good.
Add a buggy with body, with abrain that leaks, you got
(33:26):
yourself a gritty pencil-neckgeek.
Speaker 1 (33:29):
Thank you for listening.
My friends.
Happy Thursday.
I appreciate it.
Speaker 6 (33:33):
I'm sucking beer with a lousy physique.
He's a one-man, no-cut, losingstreak.
Nothing but a pencil neck geek.
Speaker 1 (33:42):
We'll see you on the radio Pencil neck geek.
Speaker 6 (33:48):
Soon the geeks were popping up all over town, you
couldn't hardly sneeze withoutknocking one down After a nice
juicy steak, if you need atoothpick.
Just reach for a geek, They'lldo the trick.
we are back.
It is a thursday and this, myfriends, is of 300 peeps, our
Pat's Peeps podcast.
Happy Thursday to ya.
I'm Patrick, the host of thePat Walsh Show on KPK Radio, 7
to 10 pm, monday through Friday,except for last night where we
had technical glitches.
But today, on this Thursday, Ilook out my studio windows into
(00:43):
the beautiful foothills ofNorthern California.
My friends, the sun's shining,a little bit of a breeze, but
it's going to be hot.
There's no doubt it's going tobe a hot one.
Happy summer to you, whereveryou are.
Thank you so much for listeningto my podcast.
Very, very much appreciate you.
Thank you for listening to myradio show as well today.
(01:04):
Part two of our experimentcursing versus no cursing Audio
bites, sound bites from the past.
Yesterday we featured soundbites that you know what?
Hey, no cursing, hilarious,memorable, some of them just
fascinating A lady calling in onherself for drunk driving.
(01:25):
Not necessarily funny, but justso fascinating.
You don't hear that very often.
But again, we're trying to seewhat people may enjoy or maybe
not enjoy, but between cursingand non-cursing soundbites.
It's just a little experimentI'm conducting here on the Pat's
Peeps Number 290.
(01:47):
So today I'm just going to letyou know I've got a dedication.
I want to talk about someonewho I really admire, and then
we're going to get into somesoundbites, which, again, I
don't believe in triggerwarnings.
I think that's weak.
But I mean, if I were intotrigger warnings I would have
triggered that.
We played yesterday thatsocialist communist conference
(02:08):
in Sacramento which is soembarrassing, but I don't really
do that.
So you so at some point?
I'm just warning you that ontwo 90, I'm not going to curse,
but I'm going to play soundbiteswith bites.
That is loaded with cursingOver the top cursing and anger.
All right, so there's yourwarning.
(02:31):
So if you want to tune outafter my initial discussion here
, okay, but then you'll miss outon all the cursing.
I'm just telling you it's superfun Anyhow.
So here on Pat's peeps 290, Iwant to let you know that a
(02:52):
radio legend is going to retire.
It's not me, but man, I lovethis guy.
Dr demento is his name.
You know, dr demento.
His real name is barrett hansen, but he's world.
He's known worldwide Dr Demento.
His real name is Barrett Hanson, but he's known worldwide as Dr
Demento.
This guy turns people on tonovelty songs.
He's been doing this for 55years, more than 55 years had
(03:12):
this show.
It's amazing, known worldwidenovelty records, goofy songs, I
mean he's going to hang up hisiconic top hat now.
He announces retirement at theend of his most recent episode
of his long-running show,wrapped up the top 10 countdown,
delivered a specialannouncement to his listeners.
(03:34):
He says I'm 84 now.
I've been doing this for nearly55 years.
I guess just under 55 years,about two-thirds of his life.
He said.
And I get that.
I mean I've been at the radiostation, I'm at for a long time,
like half of my life.
He said it's been a blast.
I've come to the decision Ineed to hang up my top hat soon.
And so what you just heard ismy last show, last of my regular
(03:57):
shows.
To me that's the key regularshows because he may want to do
some other things.
You know, maybe he wants to doa show now and then and he's not
completely hanging it up.
But the Dr Demento show willcontinue until October.
Most of the upcoming episodesare going to be pulled from the
show's archive.
They're going to include recaps, rebroadcasts, classic episodes
(04:18):
, just like what happened on myshow last night, unfortunately
because we had technical issueslast night.
But the show's final episodewill coincide with its 55th
anniversary of its first episodeand fittingly it will be doing
the top 40 countdown of noveltysongs.
The doctor, dr Demento,introduced so many of us to
(04:42):
these novelty records.
You know he did a lot of DickieGoodman.
I first heard Dickie Goodman onAM radio, though, but he did a
show in Pasadena and hecollected these novelty records.
He worked up these humoroussongs, worked them into these
playlists.
He got a bunch of positivereactions from this.
Thus the Dr Demento show wasborn and became legendary,
(05:07):
introducing us to countlessnovelty songs, some of the ones
like the Monster Mash by BobbyBoris Pickett that's become a
staple over the years.
Everyone knows that song EveryHalloween that's the first one
that's dusted off and played.
That song every halloweenthat's the first one that's
dusted off and played.
(05:28):
But he um, he also introducedus to a lot of other classics.
Here's dr demento in actionwind up your radio.
Speaker 2 (05:41):
I'm dr defensa, with mad music and crazy comedy from
out the vaults and off the wallRare records and outrageous
tapes from yesterday, today andtomorrow.
This week we'll have a saluteto the demented year 1986, with
some great comedy hits that madetheir debut that year and a
couple we haven't heard sincethen.
Whimsical Will will have hisannual salute to the big summer
(06:02):
monster movie always a highlight.
Jessica Will will have hisannual salute to the big summer
monster movie always a highlight.
Got a lot of very demented newsongs and lots of old favorites
by request.
Now we usually play this one atHalloween, but I thought, heck,
june can be a scary time ofyear too.
We're playing it this week forJason in Great Falls and Ryan in
Rochelle.
Speaker 4 (06:25):
Here's Flippy T Fishhead.
There's a full moon in thepasture tonight.
Hangs like a fine and polishedpearl, so pure and white.
The average guy finds so muchbeauty in its life.
But I'm a werecow.
Moo, moo, moo.
I'm a werecow and I'm aware DrDemento in action.
Speaker 1 (07:21):
So these would be like old.
These are kind of deep songsthat unless you were listening
to Dr Demento, you probablywould have never heard.
But then he introduced us to alot of songs that became
classics like this one.
Speaker 5 (07:38):
Remember when you ran away and I got on my knees and
begged you not to leave becauseI'd go berserk.
Speaker 6 (07:54):
Well, you left me anyhow, and then the days got
worse and worse, and now you seeI've gone completely out of my
mind they're coming to take meaway.
Speaker 5 (08:00):
Haha, they're coming to take me away.
Oh, hee-hee, ha ha.
To the funny farm where life isbeautiful.
Speaker 8 (08:04):
All the time To the funny farm where life is
beautiful all the time and I'llbe happy to see those nice young
men in their clean white coatsand they're coming to take me
away.
Speaker 1 (08:11):
Napoleon 14 on the Dr Demento show.
And so you laughed.
Speaker 6 (08:16):
You laughed when I had said that losing you would
make me flip my lid.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
Right, right.
That became very popular, thatsong.
A lot of people have heard thatone, a lot of people know that
one and a lot of people wereexposed to that because, again,
of Dr Demento Dr Demento also,by the way.
Many people don't realize this,but he kick-started Weird Al
(08:46):
Yankovic's career by playing hisearly songs and now Weird Al is
everywhere.
He's become a you know, a big,big artist.
And as a teenager, weird Althen known as Al maybe he was
known as Weird Al amongst hisfriends.
But he began sending thesehomemade tapes of his songs to
Dr Demento because he knew thatDr Demento was the guy that
(09:10):
appreciated novelty tunes, funnytunes.
And the doctor found a certaincharm in the accordion-powered
little songs that Al wouldrecord on a cheap cassette
player in his own bedroom and hegave it to him for his first
airplay.
And songs like his very firstsong, which very few people may
(09:36):
know, but this is calledBelvedere Cruising I can take
you anywhere.
Speaker 4 (09:40):
I'm a 1964 Belvedere is called Belvedere.
Speaker 1 (09:41):
Cruising.
I can take you anywhere.
I'm a 1964.
Speaker 4 (09:42):
Belvedere Go a Belvedere cruising tonight 1976.
Speaker 1 (09:55):
Enough.
Of course, I don't own therights to this amazingly great
song or any of these songs.
So he did that one, BelvedereCruising.
Then he later did this one andplayed this on the air.
And this one was done in amen's bathroom, as I recall, a
(10:18):
public restroom, my bologna.
Well, to be honest with you,this one was a done in a men's
restroom, but he did one whereit was just the accordion.
I played that on yesterday'spodcast, but he also shared this
(10:41):
one with us.
Another one rides the bus WeirdAl Dr Demento, the Dr Demento
Show.
I love the deep voice guy.
(11:03):
Yeah, yeah, I love it.
(11:32):
So we'll talk more about DrDemento on my radio show tonight
, talk about his radio career,how he got his syndication
started and everything you know.
He was also responsible.
This song kind of caught on,didn't it a little bit?
Shaving Cream this was an oldsong that he dusted off for the
(11:55):
show.
I have a sad story to tell you.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
It may hurt your feelings a bit.
Speaker 1 (12:01):
So this is Dr Demento singing Shaving Cream.
Speaker 2 (12:06):
Last night I went into my bathroom and I stepped
in a big pile of shaving cream.
Be nice and clean.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
Shave every day and you'll always look keen.
Remember this.
Speaker 2 (12:24):
Here we are in this fine, yummy coffee joint.
I hate to be picking a net, buthey, dude, I ordered Cafe Latte
Supreme and you brought me acup full of shaving cream.
Speaker 1 (12:46):
That's the good doctor now those were.
Those were songs that maybe if,even if you were sort of a
surface dr demento fan or if youdidn't even know dr demento,
you may possibly could haveheard those songs, especially
they're coming to take me awayNapoleon 14.
But when I tell you he had someweird songs that he played I
(13:08):
mean weird.
He did deep, well, fish heads.
I talked about that yesterday.
Billy Mummy from Lost in Space,barnes and Barnes did fish
heads.
That's why the world wasexposed to that crazy song.
But speaking of weird, itdoesn't get much weirder than
this from Dr Demento.
I had this record.
(13:29):
It had all these songs on there.
I got weird.
Every time I see you, I gotweird.
Speaker 6 (13:38):
Want to find a place to bite you.
I got weird.
I want to find a place to biteyou.
I got weird when I found outyou don't like me.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
I got weird Because you know that you excite me
Sitting in my little room.
It's weird that I have to findsomething obscene to do.
I know all the lyrics to thisweird song Louise off
butterflies, salt some snailsand watch them bubble bubble,
(14:07):
bubble, bubble bubble.
That's my demented head becauseof Dr Demento.
Speaker 11 (14:11):
Oh.
Speaker 1 (14:22):
And just when you think, God, that's the weirdest
song of all time, is it Becausemaybe you haven't heard from the
good doctor?
My name is not Merv Griffin.
Speaker 4 (14:31):
Now people stop me often and ask if I'm Merv
Griffin.
But I don't even know him.
I've never seen his show.
Now, everybody loves him.
What would they do without him?
They ask me all about him.
I'm Merv.
Speaker 1 (14:52):
Griffin, and I don't even know him.
Here it goes, my friends,beware.
Trigger warning.
Trigger warning, triggertrigger, trigger warning.
Speaker 4 (15:01):
Yeah, his name is not Merv Griffin.
His name is not Merv Griffin.
His name is not Merv Griffin.
Speaker 1 (15:06):
His real name is George.
Speaker 4 (15:09):
They think that they all know me.
They tell me I'm the body.
They want to touch my body.
They want to go to bed.
They give me pens and pencils.
They give me candy apples.
They want to see my nipples.
I wish that they were dead.
His name is not Merv Griffin.
His name is not Merv Griffin.
His name is not Merv Griffin.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
His real name is George Try being in Italy and
having that song looping in yourhead as an earworm, good Lord,
it will almost drive you insane.
I'll finish Pat's Peeps 290with another one of the
(15:50):
favorites from the Good DrDemento Show, and we'll talk
about that on my show tonightand we'll get way deeper into it
.
Now, my friends, comes theportion of the show, the podcast
, pat's Peeps 290, that youeither want to hear the
following cursing or you do not.
All right, it is at this pointthat not for me, but we play
(16:20):
audio part two.
Audio bites part two.
Perhaps some of the selectionsI have chosen have been bleeped.
Audio Bites Part 2.
Perhaps some of the selectionsI have chosen have been bleeped.
I didn't even check that.
But either way we're going toplay it and either way they're
filthy, okay, filthy.
So just know that.
Proceed at your own risk.
(16:42):
Sign your consent form.
Now we're going to start offcursing soundbites from the past
with my all-time favoritedodger well tied, by the way.
Neither tommy lasorda.
I'm just going to say that vinsScully is my other favorite.
I don't want to get too muchado deep into baseball.
Tommy Lasorda was asked May 14,1978, about Dave Kingman's
(17:07):
three home runs against LA.
Speaker 6 (17:12):
Can you give us just a few basic?
Speaker 8 (17:13):
comments about your feelings on the game.
Well, naturally I feel badabout losing a ballgame like
that.
There's no way you should losethat ballgame.
That just doesn't make sense.
What's your opinion ofKingman's performance?
What's my opinion of Kingman'sperformance?
What the f*** do you think ismy opinion of it?
I think it was f***ing, f***ing, f***ing.
(17:34):
Put that in, I don't f***ingOpinion of his performance.
F***ing, f***ing beat us withthree home runs.
What the f*** do you mean?
What is my opinion of hisperformance?
How can you ask me a questionlike that?
What is my opinion of hisperformance?
F***, he hit three home runs.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
Oh, they're bleeping it, they're bleeping it, I'm
f***ed off to lose the f***inggame.
Speaker 8 (17:57):
And you ask me my opinion of his performance.
That's alright, off to lose thegame.
And you asked me my opinion ofthis performance all right, well
, that's a tough question to askme, isn't it?
What is my opinion of hisperformance?
Yes, it is.
I asked it and you gave me ananswer.
Well, I didn't give you a goodanswer because I'm mad, but I
mean that wasn't a good question.
That's a tough question to askme right now what is my opinion
(18:18):
of his performance.
I mean you want me now what ismy opinion of his performance?
I mean you want me to tell youwhat my opinion of his
performance is.
You just did that's right.
The guy hits three home runs agame.
You just did, yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:33):
Now all right.
Well, that got beeped, doggoneit.
That's all right.
Though I love Tommy Lasorda, hetold it like it was Now the
next two.
I do not believe this is goingto be bleeped, and this made
Tommy LaSorda's reaction seemcalm and somewhat decent.
(18:56):
Let's stick with managers.
Let's go back to 1970.
Oh my God, I'm not even goingto play the entire thing because
it gets really crude, but noone was more fired up, I should
say, than Baltimore Oriolesmanager Earl Weaver crude, but
no one was more fired fired up,I should say than baltimore
oriole's manager, earl weaver.
Here he is, on manager's corner.
Speaker 7 (19:18):
Here we go and now to the manager's corner with earl
weaver hi everybody.
Speaker 5 (19:24):
This is earl weaver with manager's corner.
Today I have tom marr Moore,Oreo broadcaster, back on the
show and I understand Tom's beengetting some mail with
questions that supposedly I cananswer.
Now what the fuck are some ofthese goddamn questions, Tom?
Speaker 7 (19:40):
Well, first of all, earl George Moore from Baltimore
is asking how much we feel theloss of Don Stanhouse.
Speaker 5 (19:47):
Well, don Stanhouse was an asshole.
He had us in trouble, had thefucking bases loaded God damn it
almost every fucking time hewent out there.
He liked to ruin my healthsmoking cigarettes, and thank
God we got Timmy Stoddard comingin on the bullpen right now
sticking a bat up their asses,and that's what it takes.
Speaker 7 (20:04):
Well, bill Whitehouse Earl that certainly is an
answer from Frederick Merrillwants to know why you and the
Orioles don't go out and getsome more team speed Team speed,
for Christ's sake.
Speaker 5 (20:13):
You get fucking goddamn little fleas on the
fucking bases getting picked offtrying to steal, getting thrown
out, taking runs away from you.
You get them big cocksuckersthat can hit the fucking ball
out of the ballpark and youcan't make any goddamn mistake.
Speaker 7 (20:26):
Well, certainly this show is going to get out in
history.
Earl Terry Elliott ofWashington DC wants to know why
you don't use Terry Crowley as adesignated hitter.
Yeah, what about that?
Speaker 5 (20:35):
Terry Crowley's lucky .
He's in fucking baseball, forChrist's sake.
He was released by theCincinnati Reds.
He was released by the fuckinggoddamn Atlanta Braves.
We thought that Terry Crowleycould sit on his fucking ass for
eight innings and enjoywatching a baseball game just
like any other fan, and has theability to get up there and
break one open in the fuckingninth.
So if this cocksucker'd mindhis own business and let me
(20:55):
manage the fucking team, we'd bea lot better off well,
certainly you've made youropinions known on the fans
questions about baseball earl.
Speaker 7 (21:02):
But let's get to something else.
Alice sweet from norfolk wantsto know the best time to put in
a tomato plant okay, so I'm.
Speaker 1 (21:08):
I'm going to stop it right there because he gets a
little crude about that.
I'll let him talk baseball likethat, but I'm not going to play
this.
Even that's too much for me.
Meanwhile, sticking one morewith the managers in Major
League Baseball, here is theChicago Cubs' Lee Ilya manager.
Cubs manager Lee Ilya and hisinfamous tirade, april 29th 1983
(21:33):
.
Man, this is the Cubs managerand he's talking smack about the
Cub fans.
Speaker 3 (21:40):
I hope we get fucking hotter than shit just to stuff
it up them 3,000 fucking peoplethat show up every fucking day,
up every fucking day, because ifthey're the real Chicago
fucking fans, they can kiss myfucking ass right downtown and
print it.
They're really, really behindyou around here, my fucking ass.
(22:01):
What the fuck am I supposed todo?
Go out there and let my fuckingplayers get destroyed every day
and be quiet about it?
For the fucking nickel-dimepeople to show up?
The motherfuckers don't evenwork.
That's why they're out at thefucking game.
They only go out and get afucking job and find out what
it's like to go out there andfucking live it.
(22:21):
85 percent of the fuckingworld's working.
The other 15 come out here.
A fucking playground for thecocksuckers.
Rip them, motherfuckers.
Rip them cocky cocksuckers.
Rip them motherfuckers.
Speaker 1 (22:35):
Rip them cocksuckers like the fucking players.
Skipper, I got a question.
Speaker 3 (22:38):
Those guys busting their fucking ass and them
fucking people poo, and that'sthe cunts, my fucking ass.
They talk about the greatfucking support that the players
get around here.
I haven't seen it this fuckingyear.
The name of the game is hit theball, catch the ball and get
(22:58):
the fucking job done.
Right now we have more lossesthan we have wins.
The fucking changes that havehappened in the Cub organization
are multifold.
All right, they don't showbecause we're 5-14.
And unfortunately that's thecriteria of them, dumb 15
motherfucking percent that comeout to date baseball.
(23:18):
The other 85% are earning aliving.
It'll take more than a 5-13 ora 5-14 to destroy the makeup of
this club.
I guarantee you that there'ssome fucking pros out there that
want to fucking of this club.
I'll guarantee you that there'ssome fucking pros out there
that want to fucking play thisgame.
But you're stuck in a fuckingstigma of the fucking Dodgers
(23:39):
and the Phillies and theCardinals and all that cheap
shit, all these motherfuckingeditorials about, say, and
fucking the Philly-itis, and allthat shit.
Speaker 1 (23:51):
That's sickening, it's unbelievable I'm gonna
leave it at that.
I think you get his point.
Now, speaking of guys in chargebobby knight everyone knows
bobby knight out of temper.
Bobby Knight everyone knowsBobby Knight out of temper.
Rest in peace, bobby Knight, ifyou can.
(24:14):
Man, I wonder you know if he'sup there in heaven if he's
ranting like this, because herehe is at halftime of a
basketball game.
Bobby Knight, ladies andgentlemen, on Pat's Peeps 290.
What a poison.
Speaker 10 (24:28):
I'm getting the fuck out of here.
I mean, if you're not going torecover Greg Graham, if you're
just going to let him drive byyou, if the rest of you are
going to let him catch the balloutside the three-second lane
and drive all the way in herewithout one guy challenging him,
then I'm leaving and youfucking guys will run until you
can't even suffer.
(24:49):
Now I'm tired of this shit.
Now I'm tired of this shit.
I'm sick and fucking tired ofan 8 and 10 record.
I'm fucking tired of losing toPurdue.
I'm not here to fuck aroundthis week.
Now you may be, but I'm not.
Now I'm going to fuckingguarantee you that if we don't
(25:09):
play up there Monday night,you're not going to believe the
next four fucking day.
Now I am not here to get my assbeat on Monday.
Now you better fuckingunderstand that right now.
This is absolute fuckingbullshit.
Now I'll fucking run your assright into the ground.
I mean I'll fucking run you.
You'll think last night was afucking picnic.
I had to sit around for afucking year with an 8 and 10
record in this fucking lake andI mean you will not put me in
(25:31):
that fucking position again, oryou will goddamn pay for it like
you can't fucking believe.
Now you better get your headout of your ass Bobby Knight.
Speaker 1 (25:50):
Meanwhile, do not.
Whatever you do, you know Ilove Chris Berman on ESPN.
I love when he and Tom Jacksonwould do the football highlights
.
But whatever you do, do notwalk in front of Chris Berman's
camera when he's getting readyto broadcast.
Speaker 11 (26:05):
I'm doing TV and I got 18.
God damn it.
Can't everybody stop for 10minutes?
I mean, everybody seems thatthat's the only Everybody.
Can we stick Jesus Christ?
I mean it's not that much toask, Is that when everybody has
to move?
When I'm trying to concentrateJesus, and you guys thought I
was a pain in the ass, I'm sorry.
I mean that's so rude.
I can't believe that that's.
(26:26):
It's so goddamn rude.
Speaker 1 (26:27):
I didn't mean to Chris.
Speaker 11 (26:29):
Why does everyone all of a sudden have to move?
You've got two fucking hours tomove around.
Wait ten minutes.
Speaker 1 (26:34):
I was itching.
Speaker 11 (26:36):
Jesus, I'm sorry to explode by you, but it's like no
one's ever worked on TV herebefore Jesus.
Speaker 1 (26:48):
It happens to the best of them, man.
Speaker 11 (26:50):
Best of us.
What the fuck do they think I'm?
Speaker 2 (26:54):
doing.
Speaker 11 (26:59):
I actually can't believe what I just saw, not now
.
It's like no one here hasworked on TV before.
Oh jeez, I hear a dial tone andthere were seven people.
I mean Jesus, we need to usethe studio for 15 fucking
(27:21):
minutes, just everybody, youknow.
Speaker 1 (27:25):
As I say, it happens to the best of them.
You know, listen, things havehappened to me.
They were very frustrating.
I never aired it out like youknow, like that, but you know,
sometimes you get frustratedPeople.
You would never expect CaseyKasem America's Top 40.
Or America Top 40.
(27:46):
You remember, I love that showman.
He was so smooth the tone inhis voice.
Speaker 12 (27:54):
This is a classic Casey Kasem meltdown, the
countdown will begin this Sundayafternoon at 1, right here on
the radio station you grew upwith.
Speaker 4 (28:01):
Music radio 138.
Speaker 12 (28:03):
Oh fuck, what the hell is going on here.
Geez.
Well, isn't this the last hour?
We got another hour to do?
Geez, I thought we were almostfinished.
Good golly, miss Molly Boy,this is fucking ponderous man.
Ponderous, fucking ponderous.
Hi, this is Casey Kasem.
American Top 40 has moved to anew time.
I hope you'll join me thisSaturday morning and every
(28:25):
Saturday morning at 2, 2.
We're up to our long-distancededication, and this one is
about kids and pets and asituation that we can all
understand, whether we have kidsor pets or neither.
It's from a man in Cincinnati,ohio, and here's what he writes
Dear Casey, this may seem to bea strange dedication request,
(28:45):
but I'm quite sincere and it'llmean a lot if you play it.
Recently there was a death inour family.
He was a little dog namedSnuggles, but he was most
certainly a part of let's startagain.
Uh-oh, I'm coming out of therecord.
Oh, boy, play the record, okay.
Uh-oh, okay, please.
Yes, sir, see, when you comeout of those up-tempo goddamn
(29:07):
numbers, man, it See, when youcome out of those up-tempo
goddamn numbers, man, it'simpossible to make those
transitions.
And then you got to go intosomebody dying.
You know they do this to me allthe time.
I don't know what the hell theydo it for, but goddamn it if we
can't come out of a slow record.
I don't understand it.
Is Don on the phone?
Okay, I hope not.
(29:30):
I want a goddamn concertedeffort to come out of a record
that isn't a fucking up-temporecord.
Every time I do a goddamn deathdedication, now make it.
And I also want to know whathappened to the pictures I was
supposed to see this week.
This is the last goddamn time Iwant somebody to use his
fucking brain to not come out ofa goddamn record that's
up-tempo.
And I got to talk about afucking dog dying.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
A classic from Casey.
How about we get to somethingaway from the world of
entertainment?
How about this?
Yesterday I played a 911 callwhich was not exactly funny, as
I mentioned before, it was alady calling in on herself who
was drunk.
She called 911 to reportherself driving drunk, which you
(30:10):
never hear On today's Pat'sPeeps 290, the cursing audio.
This is a classic 911 call.
Man hits a deer, deer bites him, thought he was dead.
I need a bamboolance.
Speaker 9 (30:27):
The ambulance emergency line.
Do you have an emergency?
I need a bamboolance.
Who?
Ambulance emergency line.
Do you have an emergency?
I need a Bambalance.
Who is this?
Joe?
Okay, joe, where do you need us?
I'm in the motherfucking phonebooth, okay.
What's the address there?
Hold on, okay, sir.
Did you call 3911?
No, okay, joe, I need alocation.
(30:49):
What street are you on?
I'm in a motherfucking phonebooth at the stop and go.
That's it.
I'm at the motherfucking stopand go.
Speaker 1 (30:57):
They did little bleeps on this.
Speaker 9 (30:58):
Pretty good Let me tell you what.
I'm going down themotherfucking road, driving my
car, minding my own goddamnbusiness, and a motherfucking
deer jumped out and hit my car.
Okay, sir, are you injured?
Let me tell you, I get out andpick the moth deer up.
I thought he's dead.
I put the moth deer in my backseat and I'm driving down the
(31:22):
moth road and minding my ownbusiness.
The moth woke up and bit me inthe back of my god.
They bit me and then kicked theshit out of my car.
I'm in the motherfucking phonebooth.
The deer bit me in the neck.
A big motherfucking dog came upand bit me in the leg.
I hit him with themotherfucking tire iron and I
stabbed him.
Speaker 4 (31:43):
I stabbed him with my knife, so I got a hurt leg and
the motherfucking deer bit me inthe neck and the dog wanted me
out of.
Speaker 9 (31:49):
The motherfucking deer bit me in the neck and the
dog wanted me out of my fuckingphone booth because he wants the
deer.
Now, who gets the deer, me orthe dog?
Okay, sir, are you injured?
Yeah, a motherfucking deer bitme in the neck.
Speaker 1 (32:01):
Hold on, hold on now, uh-oh.
Speaker 9 (32:04):
Look out, uh-oh, the motherfucking dog is biting me.
Hold on, god damn it, get outof here.
Hold the moth-fucking dog islaying me.
Speaker 1 (32:14):
Hold on, God damn it, Get out of here.
The moth-fucking dog is layingmy ass.
I hope he gets a Bambalancesoon.
We're going to finish this oneoff my friends here on Batch
Peeps 2.90.
Going back to Dr Demento and aclassic.
This is Classy Freddy Blassie.
It's a song called Pencil NeckGeek.
(32:35):
Here we go, ladies andgentlemen.
Speaker 8 (32:37):
That's Peeps 290.
Speaker 6 (32:41):
Thank you.
Back when I was a kid, life wasgoing swell Till something
happened, blew everything tohell.
That night my daddy stumbled inall pale and weak, said a woman
up the block just gave birth toa geek.
Mom said sell it to the circus.
What the heck dad said nope,this one's a pencil neck.
(33:05):
And if there's one thing lowerthan a sideshow freak, it's a
gritty, scum-sucking pencil-neckgeek.
You see, if you take a pencilthat won't hold lead, looks like
a pipe cleaner, that's good.
Add a buggy with body, with abrain that leaks, you got
(33:26):
yourself a gritty pencil-neckgeek.
Speaker 1 (33:29):
Thank you for listening.
My friends.
Happy Thursday.
I appreciate it.
Speaker 6 (33:33):
I'm sucking beer with a lousy physique.
He's a one-man, no-cut, losingstreak.
Nothing but a pencil neck geek.
Speaker 1 (33:42):
We'll see you on the radio Pencil neck geek.
Speaker 6 (33:48):
Soon the geeks were popping up all over town, you
couldn't hardly sneeze withoutknocking one down After a nice
juicy steak, if you need atoothpick.
Just reach for a geek, They'lldo the trick.
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