Episode Transcript
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Ellen (00:03):
Happy New Year everyone.
We're so thrilled to be herewith you as we Kickstart 2024
with what we're calling apowerful intention setting
episode.
And this episode also kickstarts us into the 3 of our
podcast.
Tish (00:19):
That's right, ellen.
And today, with this, we arediving deep into six intentions
that can transform the way weapproach this new year.
Ellen (00:34):
Because we're both not
about resolutions.
You know that, tish.
We've talked about this timeand time again.
We've gone with intentions andjust to level set an intention
must include not justdestination, like a resolution I
want to lose weight, I want tolearn Spanish but include how we
get there.
Tish (00:55):
I like the idea of
intentions over resolutions
Because to me, resolutions areso hard and fast.
These kind of goals right, youeither achieve them or you break
them, while intentions, to me,are just so much broader and
speak to the actions that weneed to take.
(01:18):
Intentions are more of like aroadmap for us.
Ellen (01:24):
I like how you said that,
Tish.
I agree.
I like a roadmap.
So I'm really looking forwardto us sharing six areas of
intentions for really anyone in2024, but specifically our
midlifers.
But you know, Tish, I love thispart of our show and we haven't
(01:44):
done this in a few weeks.
Let's get to our firstobsessions of 2024.
What do you got for me?
Tish (01:52):
Well, I thought a really
great way of starting off the
new year is kind of with a newjournal, right, mm-hmm?
And I found this mantra journal, mantra gratitude journal oh,
it has it's a daily gratitude aswell as weekly reflections and
goals.
And what I loved about this ithelps us focus on affirmations,
(02:18):
self-affirmations, reflecting onlike, what went well today and
what we plan on what could maketomorrow better.
I just like the way that itflows with very positive
reinforcements about now and ourplan for the future.
(02:39):
It also, in the weeklyreflections portion, it talks
about whether, say, if one ofyour goals is working out, you
can track how many days did youmake that happen?
So you can pick and choose andthen kind of see very visually
how you're meeting your personalintentions.
Ellen (03:04):
So have you started using
the mantra gratitude journal,
or is this something you'rekicking off here in 2024?
Tish (03:10):
This is how I want to kick
off 2024.
Ellen (03:13):
Awesome.
That sounds like a great greattool for our listeners.
Tish (03:20):
Awesome.
So, Ellen, what about you?
What is something that you'reobsessed with right now?
Ellen (03:28):
Well, I was going to talk
about something else, but I
have to say after my trip backeast my friend Kimberly gave me
the best piece of candy I hadall holiday season.
Tish (03:44):
Oh, I need to hear about
this.
Ellen (03:46):
I mean I just have to say
, all intentions aside, you have
to know about the Mojeska and Iknow that's a weird name, I had
to ask it like 10 differenttimes these are candies from
Louisville, Kentucky, and theyare hand-dipped carmels that you
are dipped around a marshmallow.
(04:08):
And these candies date back tothe 1800s when an opera singer
and actress named Helen Mojeskacame to Louisville and wowed a
candy maker and he created thiscandy for her.
I've got to tell you my friendKim, she gave me about five of
them for the plane ride home andI was like, oh, I'll never eat
(04:31):
them.
Every single one of them wasgone before.
Tish (04:34):
I got back to my house.
I love it.
Ellen (04:38):
Take a look, they are
little pieces of heaven is all I
can say.
Tish (04:44):
I love when you find those
regional treats that are very
specific to an area.
I know in the area that I grewup there was a special candy
called sponge candy.
It's really only made in theBuffalo area.
So I love those regionalcandies that are quite special.
Ellen (05:06):
Yeah, so we'll put a link
.
There's a few.
I know I've had sponge candy.
It's like the maple candy youget in Vermont.
These regional candies are sospecial so we'll put a link to
both the Montregratitude Journaland the Mojeska in our show
notes.
So let's get to the firstepisode of season three, tish.
(05:27):
Let's start with our intentions.
So intention number one ispersonal growth, and I really
like this idea of saying yes tonew experiences.
It's like giving ourselvespermission to grow and to learn,
so stepping out of our comfortzone and bracing opportunities
to learn and adapt and changeAbsolutely.
Tish (05:48):
Ellen, it is those moments
of trying something new that
often lead to the most profoundpersonal development.
Whether it's picking up a newhobby or simply saying yes to
unfamiliar experiences, it allcontributes to our growth.
Ellen (06:10):
You know.
So, tish, I want you to sharewith our listeners, if you can,
and with me, what your personalgrowth intention is for 2024,
and why Do you have one?
Tish (06:22):
You know I usually pick
very physical pursuits right,
but this year I want to get moreback in touch with my creative
side and I'm planning on takingup pottery classes again.
And so friend of mine and Iwere talking about it right
before the holidays and we usedto do hand-built clay and
(06:45):
pottery will clay together andwe talked about starting it
again because we had loved it somuch.
And there's just somethingabout creating pieces out of
clay, whether it's on a wheel orhand-built.
That just so exciting to me.
Ellen (07:04):
You know, I never even
knew that you did pottery before
, so I'm learning about you, ifyou can believe that All these
years that's really fun.
I'm excited for you.
And it's true, you usually dophysical pursuits, so this one
will be a really great kind ofchange to your arty side, to
(07:24):
your creative side.
I'm excited for you.
Tish (07:27):
Yeah, I'm looking forward
to it.
What about you?
Ellen (07:32):
All right.
Well, my personal growth inKenchin is to get back to
learning Spanish, and you know,I lived in Madrid during our
junior year in college and now Itried to learn Spanish back
then and I work for a Europeancompany right now, a subsidiary
where everyone speaks multiplelanguages perfectly.
(07:55):
People are speaking German andEnglish and French.
It just makes me want to besomeone who can speak more than
one language, and so it reallyreignited this idea of getting
back to learning and perfectingmy Spanish.
So I started by downloadingthis app called Babble and 15
(08:18):
minutes a day for three months.
I've committed to that, so I'mreally excited, and the other
thing I love about doing it withan app like Babble is that I
can start small.
You know I'm not committed togoing to a class and two, three
times a week in homework, and socan I say hello, atomic, tiny
habit here, 15 minutes a day.
Tish (08:41):
I love that.
Now, what does something likethat cost?
Ellen (08:45):
Yeah, I mean, I think
that's a great question.
It was, I think, about $7.50 amonth if you sign up for a
longer period of time and about$12 a month if you sign up for a
short period of time.
So, hey, heck, it's like somepeople just give up your latte,
right?
You're latte a couple of timesa week and you've covered the
(09:08):
cost of Babble.
Tish (09:10):
Yeah, I like that.
That sounds really good.
Now, is that really for someonewho's relearning a language, or
can anyone do that?
Ellen (09:20):
You know they have it
right from the very get-go and
I've heard great things about it.
So you can be like me, somebodywho can, you know, talk a
little bit, understand a littlebit more, who's very rusty, or
you can be a first-timer.
So I will report back in howabout that in three months in
Spanish.
Tish (09:42):
I know.
No, we're going to hold you tothat one.
Ellen (09:46):
All right.
Well, speaking of us saying yesin 2024, intention number two
is all about seizingopportunities and, as we've said
, sometimes the best things canbegin with just a single yes.
Those can be unexpected andrewarding paths and, as we know,
it can be creative andinnovative.
Tish (10:08):
You know, isn't it like
that quote?
You know, opportunity doesn'tknock.
It presents itself when youbeat the door down.
We have the power to createopportunities by saying yes to
new adventures and challenges.
Ellen (10:29):
You know, Tish, I think
you and I are both really open
to seizing opportunities andsaying yes.
So I don't think you and I needa whole heck of a lot of
practice in 2024, but I think weneed to continue to be open to
it.
What about you?
Tish (10:48):
Yes, I think one of the
new things that I want to
explore in this new year is Iwant to start to seek out
opportunities to do publicspeaking about women's
empowerment.
I just feel so passionate.
You know through our podcastthat I want to have an impact
(11:12):
about how women feel aboutthemselves and how they see
especially aging right.
Yeah, we get so much negativein the world and we get so much
negative messaging about gettingolder.
You know about changes andstuff in our life and I want to
expand our positive message thatwe give on our podcast and I
(11:37):
want to get out there in othervenues as well.
Ellen (11:41):
I love that, bravo.
I really look forward to youdoing that in 2024.
And you know what?
What is all about embracing newopportunities.
So let's report back in, maybein six months, on how you're
doing on that one.
Tish (11:58):
Okay, now let's go right
into it.
I want to tackle intentionnumber three, and this one we're
calling overcoming fear.
You know, saying yes to newthings can be very intimidating,
but it's through theseexperiences that we learn, that
(12:18):
we can build resilience andconquer our fears.
Ellen (12:24):
You know, tish, that's so
true, especially here at
Midlife.
For me, stepping out of mycomfort zone has allowed me to
develop a more adventurousmindset and you know, I think
that can happen for anyone, anda lot of times what initially
scares us can end up being themost rewarding experience.
(12:45):
What do you think you want todo here in 2024,?
Tish, to overcome fear.
Tish (12:52):
I think the biggest fear
that I've been facing lately is
about getting sick.
You know I've had some healthissues, some serious medical
conditions, so my intention for2024 is about continuing my
health journey and focusing on ahealthy meal prep and building
(13:13):
my core strength.
I really believe that those twothings are really the next
course of my health journey.
Ellen (13:24):
I love that, you know.
I do recall we kicked off theyear last year with kind of
those 12 things every woman atmidlife should do around health,
and I know you worked reallyhard on all 12 of those.
So I agree that this isprobably a great place for you
(13:44):
to focus for intention numberthree, yeah, yeah, and again, I
know that core strength you'vetalked about too, around surfing
Another thing that's really oneof the things you'd like to
build up and doing.
Tish (14:01):
That was one of my goals
and I have not.
I have not conquered that goalyet, but I think you know, again
, with some of my healthstruggles, you know, it's it's
kind of held me back in a fewareas and I think that's the
fear, right.
I think a lot of people, as weget older, we just feel more
(14:21):
vulnerable, right, and how do wecounteract that?
And I really do think it'spursuing health and making sure
that our bodies are as strong asthey can be.
Ellen (14:37):
You know, I agree with
you wholeheartedly on this one.
And I'm going to add for me, Ihave a lot of fears around aging
, not in how I look per se, buthaving to have somebody help me.
You know, not being able tobend over and pick something up
my flexibility, that type ofthing.
(14:57):
So I would say that this isprobably one of the key areas
for many of us in in midlife,and I am going to say I did
conquer some fears in 2023.
I overcame swimming andsnorkeling.
These are kind of sillysnorkeling.
(15:18):
I was there for that one, youwere there swimming with
stingrays, right, and I thinkfor me, I'd like to break some
of the fears I've carried foryears.
Right, these aren't new fears.
I've been afraid of the oceansince I was three and a crab bit
me at the Jersey Shore, right.
Tish (15:37):
So Were we going to talk
about the size of this crab
again?
I know.
Ellen (15:42):
I know the giant, you
know 24 inch crab that that bit
me.
But you know, I I think for mesomething that I am I don't
usually put, push myselfphysically the way you do in a
challenge, and I'm going to sayI never really got to the swing
(16:03):
dancing.
Last year I went, you know, itwas like a dabble, a dabble, and
I'm, I'm afraid, I am very muchafraid of my two left feet and
being the worst one in the classor having no one to dance with,
or having sweaty palms.
I mean, you name it, I'm, I'vegot a lot of fear.
And so I'm actually going to sayI'm going to put myself out
(16:26):
there again around dancing andspecifically swing dancing,
something I've always wanted todo and really, I have to say I
have a lot of fears.
Tish (16:41):
I'm so proud of you for
wanting to do that.
You know it's so easy just tojust say, oh, there's just
something I don't want to.
You know, to kind of backpuddle and say you don't want to
do something because of fear.
But when you move forward, justlike you did with the stingrays
and just like you did withsnorkeling with the what kind of
(17:05):
fish were they?
Ellen (17:07):
The tarpons, the giant
tarpons.
Tish (17:09):
Yes, right, and but you
faced both of those and you
embraced the moment and what youwere doing, and you did it in a
safe, not crazy way, and it'sempowering when we face our
fears.
Ellen (17:27):
Yeah, I did feel
empowered by it.
I have to say that fear of theocean has been really with me
forever and I mean, gosh, thatocean is clear, like you can see
your toes right, I mean.
I really did not need to be soafraid there, but I think really
at midlife, taking kind ofalmost like an accounting of
(17:50):
what some of those things areand really looking at why and
how could be good for all of us.
So I think what we're going tosay, we're going to check in on
your core strength and your mealprep and your healthy journey
and my dancing in about sixmonths.
All right, let's move on toyeah, let's move on to intention
(18:13):
number four.
This is building connections,and I think this one is so
important at midlife.
You know, you and I have talkedabout this research about
loneliness and friendshipsthroughout the podcast and how
important this is.
So embracing new experiences,new people, opening doors to
meet people who aren't like you,diverse folks, fostering deeper
(18:37):
connections and expanding oursupport networks is so critical
to midlife women.
Tish (18:46):
You know, it's incredible
how trying new things can
introduce us to people we maynot have cross paths with
otherwise.
Right yeah, these connectionsenrich our lives and offer
different perspectives thatcontinue our own personal growth
.
Ellen (19:06):
I know I brought this up
last year, but I really would
like to not make this intentionaround maybe meeting people
through new experiences as muchas it is building and fostering
deeper connections with peoplewho are already in my orbit that
(19:26):
I may have not been able tokeep in touch with or keep up
with in 2024.
And I think I need to have anintentional plan around this
tish like contacting someone newevery week, right, that old
friends that you're like, oh, I,just I haven't had time to
(19:46):
catch up with them.
I think if I don't have anintentional plan to do this, it
won't happen.
So this is a big one for me.
Tish (19:58):
I love the intention of
reconnecting with old friends
and I might just need topiggyback on the intention too.
In fact, I know exactly where Iplan on starting, because right
before the holidays I got acall from one of my mom's best
(20:18):
friends.
Her name was Anne, oh, so nice.
Yeah, she had moved away and Iknow my mom had kept in touch
with her, but and then I wouldhear from her every now and
again and she reached out to meand we played a little phone tag
(20:39):
back and forth.
But I am committed here intothis new year for her to be the
one that I reach out to first,because I want, I do wanna, make
that connection with her, thatreconnection with her, and I've
talked about this before when Iconnect with my mom's old
friends it just makes me feel somuch closer to her.
Ellen (21:03):
Tish, that's beautiful,
and I'm so happy to hear that.
I mean listen between our kids,our jobs, our lives, the
day-to-day management of this,keeping up with our health,
these are the kinds of thingsthat can sometimes just fall off
our to-do list, and I think byus intentionally making this
(21:25):
part of our 2024 plans, we canboth do this, and I, too, have
really some folks I'm dying toreconnect with.
So how did it feel when youtalked to Anne?
Tish (21:40):
We've been playing phone
tag and so I'm sure that I get
with her here at the beginningof this year.
You know, going down with theflu there we're at the holidays
kind of puts that definitely onhold for me.
But it was just so nice to hearher voice and I know now that
(22:01):
I'm feeling better and strongerI thought, oh, I need to give
her that call back because I dowanna make that connection with
her and I do wanna stay in touchwith her.
And there's a list of peoplelike that in my life that we
can't talk to them every weekbut to think, oh, one or two
(22:24):
people a month, who am I gonnareach out to Just to say, hey,
I'm thinking about you.
Ellen (22:32):
I have to share with you
and our listeners that I called
our college friend, linda Durandright before the holidays
because she had had a couple oflosses in her life and I hadn't
sent a card.
It's like sometimes we just gettoo busy.
(22:53):
I didn't want it to get too farpast and I got her message.
Her message, I left a messageand she sent me the kindest
thing, linda, if you'relistening, it was so kind.
She just said hearing yourvoice made me smile and thanks
for connecting.
And so I just have to say thesethings can just be so
(23:16):
meaningful and so fruitful to usand again, it doesn't have to
be every day, it can just be onea month, right, it just can be
one a month.
So I think that this buildingconnections is a really good
intention for us this year.
Tish.
Tish (23:34):
Yes, especially at
mid-life.
But moving on, I wanna talkabout number five, and we're
calling this one EnhancingWell-Being, Trying new
activities and embracing changethat can lead to increased
fulfillment, reduced stress anda greater sense of purpose.
Ellen (23:59):
Oh, absolutely Tish.
This one is so important andwhen we spoke to Lois and Ashley
about well-being around theholidays, they had so many great
things for us to do andactivities and I think just
really digging into this areacan bring so much joy and
fulfillment to us at mid-lifeLike for me continuing to do
(24:23):
yoga, which has a big meditationpiece to it that can enhance
both my mental and physicalwell-being.
Tish (24:32):
You know, I am really kind
of focused for me on February.
Once I am post-surgery, I'mready to get back into playing
pickleball, because I've missedit so and I've missed the
friends that I've made aroundplaying, and so I've had to give
myself a little grace and alittle time of healing.
(24:54):
But I know that my intention isthat this year it's coming back
to my life.
Ellen (25:03):
I hope so, because I have
never seen you happier than
when you were pickle, pickle,pickle, pickle, pickle.
As our friend Kristen said, youwere pickling every day,
practically so happy and so, Ithink, just energetic.
I mean that your pickleballgave you massive amounts of
(25:26):
energy.
Tish (25:27):
Yes, and so I think my
intention of making that a
priority in this new year isgoing to really lead to what
that intention number fiveenhancing my well-being.
Ellen (25:43):
Amazing.
So many ways at midlife to dothat, to enhance the well-being
I mean.
I don't even think it needs tobe physical, it could just be
something like meditation orreading right.
I think what I've really cometo know is that there are many
(26:04):
ways to kind of fill your cupright and around well-being.
All right, I know that we haveintention number six, and this
one is a really big one.
As I get older, tish, this isembracing change and saying yes
to new things, which reallyfosters adaptability and
(26:28):
resilience and essential it's anessential quality, I think, for
getting older, for reallynavigating the world that's
changing, you know, at the speedof sound.
Tish (26:40):
Change is inevitable and
we all know that.
And when we learn to embrace itrather than resist it, we open
ourselves to these endlesspossibilities, and I think 2024
is a great year to start sayingyes to more things right.
(27:00):
Instead of hesitating andkeeping yourself in the mindset
of caution, I think we need tokeep ourselves in the mindset of
saying yes to these new things.
Remember that movie, the yesman?
Ellen (27:21):
Who was in that movie?
Was that Jim Carrey?
I can't remember.
Tish (27:26):
Yes, it was Jim Carrey,
and he changes his whole life by
just saying yes, yes, whichleads him into crazy situations,
but it was his way of justsaying yes to everything.
He changed really the wholedynamics of his life.
Ellen (27:44):
I'm gonna have to
re-watch that movie, but I
noticed for me this area isgetting harder and harder.
I'm gonna just make a sound.
That's me trying to go with theflow or embracing change.
So I know this is an area Ireally need to be aware of being
(28:06):
open to change big and small.
Right, it doesn't have to besomething big.
It could be somebody saying Idon't wanna see that movie, or
let's eat here instead of there,or go out Friday versus
Saturday, or it could be a bigchange like a friend's moving
away and feeling sad about it.
So, mid-lifers, as we embark on2024, let's consider all six of
(28:31):
these intentions and saying yesto new experiences.
I think is one of the mostimportant here To see these
opportunity, overcome your fears, build connections, enhance
wellbeing and, above all, Iwould say for me, tish.
I think I'm gonna say thenumber one intention for me is
embracing change.
What about you?
Tish (28:55):
I think probably for me
it's going to be enhancing
wellbeing.
I think that one's gonna be abig one for me, right Just from
how I ended this last year.
But I just wanna thank all ofour listeners for tuning in to
(29:18):
the Positively Midlife podcast.
We hope that our intentionsinspire you to create or push
your own intentions.
Our intention as a podcast isto share more inspiring topics,
more inspiring stories andinsights with you on the season
(29:43):
number three for us Can'tbelieve it and throughout, I
know and throughout 2024.
And we want to know what isinteresting to you.
What do you wanna hear about inthis new year?
We'd love to hear some of yourideas.
Please reach out to us on ourwebsite and let us know maybe a
(30:08):
guess that you'd love for us tointerview.
We'd love to hear from you inthis new year and that is our
intention is to also have moreinteraction with our listeners.
Ellen (30:22):
So true, absolutely In
2024, we wanna hear from you
more.
So remember it's never too lateto create a great midlife.
All right, happy new year,happy 2024,.
Everyone Till next week,midlife first.