March 16, 2026 • 30 mins
Why are so many of us hanging around waiting for a shoulder tap, an invite, or someone to say ‘go ahead’? Nat and Kristen get into where permission-seeking comes from, why it's a learned behaviour rather than a personal failing, and what you can do about it - starting with the low-stakes stuff like just picking the restaurant. Also featuring: Simone Biles, a deeply uncomfortable rewatch of Nashville, and why your professional development budget is probably sitting there untouched while someone else spends it.
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Episode Transcript
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(00:05):
Welcome to Power Up, the podcastthat uncovers the unique
challenges women leaders face today.
Join your hosts Nat and Kristen as we dive into the tough topics
and provide actionable insights you can apply right now.
Don't forget to hit subscribe soyou don't miss any episodes.
(00:38):
We're calling this episode Stop Waiting for a Green Light.
And this is a bit of a carry on from ask versus guest culture
Episode 151. Go back and listen to that.
So this idea kind of extends behaviors in what we have kind
of said. I think for the most part, we're
in a guest culture, but what happens is we also wait for
(00:59):
permission to act. So today is all about why are we
waiting for a green light? Why just so many of us do that
and where does it come from and what can we do about it?
But firstly, Nat, just putting you on the spot here.
Can you think of a time I don't know recently, either personally
or in a situation where someone was waiting for permission to do
(01:19):
something they kind of already knew they wanted to do?
I don't know. Did I give you permission to
even stop this conversation? What are you doing?
You're a great sport. I'm like, it doesn't always
apply to us, but actually I I thought of a good example, but
I'm going to let you share one first.
I feel like I see this all the time in power suit and I think
both of us are probably, I mean,if you start a company, you very
(01:41):
quickly get asking for permission beaten out of you
because if you ask for permission, you literally never
get off the start line. You every day we just have to
sort of keep asking and keep doing so.
I think we are just through sheer positioning kind of an
exception to this. I don't know if that's our
natural instinct, but I think itjust gets bean, like I said.
(02:02):
But I noticed this all the time with power suitors.
We talked to a lot of power suitors and potential power
suitors. And there's often this like
you're in the middle of a conversation, you're talking
about this big challenge facing someone.
And often what it boils down to is they're waiting for
permission, like they're waitingfor the invite to the meeting.
They're waiting to be asked to put their hand up for the role
(02:24):
or shoulder tapped the role or they're waiting for, oh gosh, I,
I feel like there's so many examples where the, the
conversation is phrased as no one's asked me or they didn't
shoulder tap me. It's not phrased as I'm waiting
for permission. But the language is passive.
It's like someone else has to act for me to do something.
(02:45):
And I'm constantly saying to people, why can't you just do
that? And it's just not something
that's occurred to them. No.
And we are going to share why very shortly.
But what I want, I was thinking of the last time I asked
permission to do something. And it was when I quit my job, I
felt comfortable in myself. It was something I knew I wanted
to do. I was like 100%, I'm going to
(03:06):
quit this job. And immediately there were two
people that came to mind, both men that I had to ask
permission, quit my job. And what I was doing was I was
seeking. Finishing one of them might be
your husband and there's a financial implication for him.
This is really embarrassing but it wasn't my husband because he
was the one to tell me he was the one to tell me to quit.
(03:26):
It was actually two other men, 1was an old boss who is a mentor
and the other was my dad. And I weirdly needed this
permission to quit my job even though I was going to do it or
wanted to do it, but it was likeI needed their validation to do
it. I needed them to tell me here's
what you must consider when you do this and have like that talk.
Which one I appreciated the other one, whatever, it was
(03:50):
fine. It was fine and I quit my job.
But I was like, that was the last time I basically sought
permission to do something. No, not the last time.
That was a very memorable one where I like needed, yeah, I
needed like, my dad's like, approval.
But anyway there I. Had the opposite, not the
opposite reaction, the opposite approach to that because I
definitely was worried when I quit my job that my parents
(04:13):
would be not stoked about it so I just did it and then said I
was did it afterwards and they were like great finally about
time get home. OK, well, I want to go right
back to primary school. And the University of Maryland
found that teachers give boys more instructional time and
direct feedback. We know that that goes right
(04:35):
through to the workplace about the type of feedback we receive.
And girls get praise for compliance, waiting our turn,
raising our hand, following the rules, coloring in the lines.
So it's no surprise that by the time we're in the workplace,
waiting for permission is a learned behavior.
I feel like I'm going to be jumping all over the show a
(04:56):
little bit today. I have literally been in
meetings since 8:30 this morning.
So this is me doing my prep during the podcast.
But I just want to go back to the asking permission to quit
our jobs because I don't think either of us did.
I actually think what we did there is we wanted sounding
boards and we wanted people to challenge our thinking before
making the decision. But I do think that's quite
(05:16):
different from feeling like, like, I think that asking for
permission that I've seen is there's no action.
There's no like, I'm going to dothis.
What do you think? It's like, I wouldn't even think
I could do this. It's not even on my plate until
someone tells me I can. I think it's a Gray area is what
we've discovered here. Because when I think about a
(05:37):
bouncing, what did you call it? A A sounding board.
Sounding board. When I think I'm a bouncing
board, when I think of a sounding board, I think of my
mum or I think of my husband andthey're my sound.
I've got my sounding boards, right, just like I am a sounding
board from my daughter or punching bag, one of the two.
But but do you? Think though, that sounding
(05:57):
boards what you may have been looking for, there was the Black
Hat thinking you specifically went after two people who may
not have thought the same thing.One yes, but no.
My dad was permission and it wasn't that I I was still going
to go and do it right, But what I what I had to do was explain
and justify and get his like Gold Star before doing it.
(06:21):
I'm not, it wouldn't have stopped me from doing it, but it
was a weird learned behavior of like a big life shift and
getting a dad to say OK and thenhaving him and his head go.
I bought in like it was stakeholder management that.
I'm gonna put a question mark over your example because I
definitely feel like the the permission culture that I've
(06:41):
seen is more we've had this and often it's a men who come to us
saying we advertise this job andin my team is the perfect person
for that job. But she didn't even apply.
And then they've gone and talkedto the woman and she goes, I
thought you'd shoulder tap me and she was experiencing that as
because I didn't get a shoulder tap, that meant I wasn't the
(07:03):
right person for the job. So I didn't put my name forward
where his expectation was. Here is the job.
Put your hand up for it. I love it that that something is
quite different from I was goingto do it anyway, but I wanted a
sounding board. And I and I do feel like yes,
there might be, you might have other issues, you might be
mucked up another one. Yeah, it was approval.
(07:23):
I was seeking approval and you wanted.
Approval, but you were going to do it anyway.
And my experience with this is it's far more passive.
It's like. OK, OK.
Like I'll be. Hang on.
We'll never know. We'll never know, by the way,
because I got permission, therefore I did it.
So no, no, no. Anyway, no, you're right.
You're right. I got you.
I got you. I got you.
I've experienced some friendshipgroups where someone will say, I
(07:44):
didn't get invited and I'm like to like a dinner where you saw
everyone else inviting themselves.
Like it's such a like the need for explicit permission.
Otherwise there's no action thatI find really.
Like, that's the crippling part of this.
This is the part that means the world moves forward and you're
sitting there waiting for someone to give you permission
(08:05):
to join in. And very good reason.
Again, I'm just going to keep digging into the research
because I think it's important we normalize it that this isn't
a thing that's our fault. And then we're going to go into
things we can do about it. And psychologists is caught
there. There's if you find yourself
approval seeking, which we've described a few scenarios in
which we are, they call it sociotrophy.
(08:26):
And this is a deep need for validation before acting, which
I would suggest this is how we're conditioned.
And it talks about high investment.
This is where you are making high investment in interpersonal
relationships. You have a strong desire for
social acceptance and a tendencyto be a people pleaser.
So there is a, you know, they'recalled this like act of this
(08:48):
need for validation and permission before acting, very
specifically before acting is that we tend to be people
pleasers. And it shows up again, not
because we were Born This Way, but because we have been.
I was thinking about all the ways that our worth has been
tied to our choices. And so we're constantly, our
(09:10):
choices are constantly either being questioned or undermined.
Therefore, we have this innate learned behavior to go, I can't
make a choice and take action. I need kind of approval to do
it. And I'm I'll just hear me out
here, like just little things like retire worth to choices we
make about being a stay at home mom versus being a working mom
(09:33):
or and you know, there's always this justification.
Oh, I'm so fortunate my husband works.
And so therefore like, Oh, I just, you know, you.
Ever tell Kristen you're so fortunate that your husband has
a job? And then it's like, oh, I'm, you
know, I had to use my bread. Like, there's this justification
for being a working mom. And there's like, our choices.
Choices for having, you know, what is it?
(09:57):
Beauty, beauty treatments on ourfaces and choices for not having
like it's like we always constantly are justifying the
choices for our about our bodiesand about our life and career
decisions because of the social conditioning.
Is that a question? To say on that, you're the
savant for our podcast. So I can't remember the last
time we spoke about this. I think that boiled down to when
(10:20):
you really think about it, it's because up until very recently,
we haven't had financial independence.
We actually haven't had control over our own lives.
We've had to be very tied to other people, to TV shows that
show this. And that means you need
permission. You literally needed permission
to do anything. First one I'm watching with Kyla
at the moment, The House of Guinness on Netflix.
(10:41):
I highly recommend, but watchingthe I'm not going to #spoiler
alert, but watching the way a will is divided and the
assumptions baked into where thewoman sat and what they did or
didn't get. And you just look and there was
a quote from one person on that show that she's like, my entire
(11:01):
life is now tied me into stayingmarried to someone.
Otherwise, I'm destitute effectively.
And just like that, I feel like when you think about our entire
history has been developing an incredible set of skills that
allows us to get the things we want through things like asking
for permission when we literallydid not have the power or
(11:22):
authority over our own lives. So I think it's an incredibly
powerful tool we've developed. It is just one that no longer
serves us. Now we do often have financial
independence and autonomy over our own lives.
The second TV. Hang on, hang on.
Episode 74 and episode 74. And that's not because I
remembered it is because I quickly looked it up and there's
Surprising facts about women andmoney.
(11:43):
Episode 74. OK, carry on.
The second TV show that I am watching because I loved it the
first time and I find this so interesting to re watch TV shows
that do not stand the test of time.
Also you're welcome podcast listeners that I've moved off
Instagram and into TV shows to give you my carefully thought
out research from I am re watching.
(12:03):
Have you ever watched the TV show Nashville?
Hang on, yes, it has the ACT actress that in the end was in
The White Lotus. So yes, I do remember this.
Yes, the mum. Yeah, the mum was the mum in
Nashville. Connie Connie Bruton or one of
the. Beautiful WAVY locks.
She was the first, I think she was the first mum in the White
Lotus. Anyway, I digress.
(12:25):
Cool. So this show came out, I don't
know when it came out, but it's sitting like 2015 and I am like
on my couch like with my blood boiling through most of it.
Like there's some good music. Well, average music.
No, it's fine, It's fine. But watching and I was talking
to Kyler about it that I was like, this is not ATV show that
(12:46):
was designed to show us how toxic these relationships were.
It's just in 2015 that was an accepted relationship dynamic.
And it was. It's like things like some dude
has had a baby with someone elseand his new girlfriend is
running around cooking all the meals and doing all the washing.
(13:06):
And but more particularly is theemotional permission that all
the women in the show, the men are throwing their toys, they're
refusing to talk. They are demanding what they
need. And all the women are running
around trying to smooth the edges.
And they are effectively having to ask permission to stay out of
danger, effectively with these men who are just completely
(13:28):
emotionally volatile, if not physically volatile, and whose
emotions they need to manage to get anything done in life or to
even have autonomy over their lives.
And they're in a relationship with a man.
And I just think if you're interested, just watch a show
like that and just see like thisis 10 years ago that I would
have watched this and not even clocked how terrible those
(13:50):
dynamics were. I think that's so interesting
because even if people don't relate exactly because that's
like really intense and some will relate.
But I think that also shows through in the workplace, like
the fact that we are often tasked with being the
peacemakers. And it's when I think about
silos and I think about the corporates I've been in, it's
been men that have been like kings of their own silos.
(14:13):
And it's been the women that have been running in between the
silos and trying to smooth, smooth stuff through.
But what it can look like, what it can look like, in addition to
kind of being needing to be the peacemaker and the diplomat is
stopping yourself, like questioning how you appear in
their eyes and if I side with this person or not with this
person or yet not putting your hand up for XYZ.
(14:37):
Yeah. Promotions projects, I mean,
yeah. Some of these examples were bad,
but I always find the more mundane ones, the serious ones,
because it's things like these examples being these women won't
say yes to job opportunities without their partner's
permission, whereas the men willjust go and do it.
Whereas the women have to make sure it works around their
partner's schedule and otherwisethe man will just blow up and
(15:00):
like not speak to them. And you're like, I mean, it's
dramatic, but it's like a very clearly, it was such a
normalized concept that I didn'teven notice it when I face watch
them. But we do, I mean, it is still
very real, even if it's not realin our lives because we run the
how to say no workshop as an example.
It's also mini master class in power suit.
(15:21):
And quite often the barrier at the end for women is that the,
you know, well, my husband's just not going to do it or he's
not going to, you know, put up with my boundary.
It's like, oh God, quite often, exactly.
Quite often we're like, OK, how might we?
What is the thing called when you're like like someones
(15:42):
brainwashed and you have to reprogram their brains?
What's it called? Deprogramming.
No it's not. There's like a thing.
Red Pilling, blue Pilling, red Pilling, some pills.
Quick, quick story time because I was looking at Simone Biles
and the fact that she needed, asyou recall, in Tokyo Olympics
where she pulled out of the Olympics, there was an uproar.
(16:05):
There was an uproar. What a transgression because who
gave her permission to make a decision about her body and her
choices, right? Like it was like, hang on a
minute, you owe us these medals.And so, you know, I was kind of
thinking about her, which let merelate to my very, very non
professional sporting background.
(16:27):
Why am I getting to this where my physiotherapist was a cult
member of the Moonies in the States.
He was actually in a cult for many, many years.
This. Is a broadcast topic on its own.
I'm living so. Much.
Yeah. And he would tell me about this
and after we did our physio, youknow, things he would like crack
out because I was fascinated, ofcourse, love the drama.
(16:48):
And he would crack out his bookslike binders.
And he had newspaper clippings and there were stories on the
Moonies. This is what the cult was
called. And he was sent to Florida.
And so then he eventually got out of this cult.
I can't recall how this is many moons ago.
Get it, Moonies. Anyway, so I'm laughing at
(17:11):
myself. I'm so funny.
And then and then he turned intoa person that was hired by the
parents to go kidnap their kids out of cults and he would kidnap
them and put them in barns and reprogram them.
And there was a word for it to actually start to go hang on.
You do not need. You are no longer controlled by
those around you and by this cult.
(17:33):
And I guess that's what we're trying to do.
Well, however, just deprogram. Unfortunately, this social
conditioning of needing to wait and to ask.
I love that. I hope he asked for permission
from the parents before he went and kidnapped.
Yeah, well, they were. He was, what he was doing was
illegal. Obviously he can't kidnap, but
(17:53):
he was, it was a it was an underground economy because at
the time their parents were willing to to pay for, you know,
their kids back. Yeah.
I feel like even that going backto the Simone Biles example,
even though I'd rather just go down this cult conversation, but
we're going to roll back. I've seen the same with the
likes of Taylor Swift and actually a lot of women online.
(18:16):
And again, now we're going back to more comfortable territory of
Instagram reels. But the number of Instagram
reels I've seen where it'll be some guy saying, oh, she needs
to know that she's never going to pick up a man if she does
this. And now of course there's the
pushback of women doing whateverthey do over it, where they're
like, and why do we care? Like, but what I think is
interesting that that that ability for a group of people to
(18:40):
think they can go, oh, you're not going to get anything if you
behave like that. Like I get to decide that for
you. If you a Taylor Swift who wants
to have your cats around you anddisrespect whatever notion about
the world that I have, you're not going to find a man.
And that the now it's only been recently that a lot of women
push back and go like, why wouldI want to, if that was the
(19:01):
condition, be under to find him like and but again, very, very
recent, up until recently, we just watched that and be like,
Oh no, she's never going to finda man.
No, because again, the dream. But I feel like that's that,
that's the, I think the full overlay of a lot of the stuff is
that concept of male gays. And this is not a bad thing.
(19:23):
This is not anything that men dowrong.
This is that women have been socialized to really try and
attract the approval and permission from men and tailor a
lot of our lives to that, which is why these Instagram reels
around, she's not going to, she hasn't hit our criteria for
being chosen. Thus she will not be is really
(19:46):
interesting because you don't really see that in reverse.
You don't see women coming out going oh, he decided to do that.
He's not going to get a girlfriend.
You know, like more so now, but not that long ago.
You know, what I think is, do you know what I think is even
more insidious is this language,and I think I've described it
(20:06):
above, that we've learned that our behavior maybe hasn't led to
anything, therefore we've stopped behaving.
So obviously we're calling that out, but it can.
Come through and things like, I'm just waiting for the right
moment. I don't feel ready enough.
I'm just going to. It's quite often like I just
need XYZ. Like I need another course.
I need another year under my devout, I need another whatever.
(20:27):
And we know I think 98% of people leaders who've stepped or
successful people when you chat with them and I mean that in
terms of like hierarchy and roles and whatever have never
felt ready for the big step ever.
Like not once. So they're like, Oh yeah, I kind
of did XYZ and then I took the thing.
So we talked a lot about that mentality, but I think those
lies that we tell ourselves, or I'm waiting for the right
(20:48):
moment, the perfect moment got us in so many arenas of our life
that's I'm going to this is it can be somewhat of a what is it?
This is not a very nice title, but there's this concept of
learned helpfulness, and it can be a little bit of what is it
controversial? Learned helplessness.
Yeah. Learned helplessness.
What did I say? Helpfulness.
(21:09):
That too. It's both.
I'm helpful. I'm helpless.
Learned helplessness. This Martin Seligaman because
original research found that when we experience enough
situations where actions don't change outcomes, we start to
internalize the idea that actingdoesn't matter.
So I think it's this like we've been talked over enough times or
(21:29):
we didn't get the right job or our ideas were owned by someone
else. We were passed over da da da.
We've just internalized it all and it's like it's almost again
in the drama triangle of victim mode.
It's like I've been burned before and so I'm not going to
bother anymore, you know? Like, no wars have ever been won
that way. No change has ever been changed
(21:50):
that way, you know. When I think also it's that idea
that doing it one way, if it didn't work, that means you
can't do it at all versus what our power suit philosophy is, is
let's experiment with another way.
Let's tweak our behavior a little bit, try something
slightly different and see if itresults in a different outcome.
Because I do feel like, I mean, I've just gotten off the phone
with a person in Korea who may be listening.
(22:13):
Hello, hi Korea. And like talking about different
cultures as well and, and how the gender gender differences
play out with having, you know, like women walking into
workplaces. And this is not just Korea.
This is around the world have very different expectations.
And depending on if it's a multinational company, depending
(22:34):
if it's a local company, depending on the type of
industry, a companies in a womanwalking in and just assuming
permission will be interpreted quite differently from a man
doing the same. And that's a whole other overlay
on this, which, yeah, which is is outside of our control, but
we can to control some things. And I think that's what we want
(22:55):
to finish off with. Other than what have we
traversed Terrible TV shows, cults, lot of research, dived
back into the reels. But I think one of the things
that's really important with this asking for permission is
like, let's figure out ways we can stop waiting and start just
(23:15):
taking that permission. So I don't know if you've got
any thoughts on something that someone who's listening today
might be able to sort of take that assume ownership unless
otherwise. Yeah.
Well, I, I, I like that. And I think often what I find,
what I've learned both of myselfand others as that it often
starts with a question because you know, you're thinking
(23:38):
through things through in your head and you're like, what if I
get this wrong or am I allowed? And there's often questions we
ask ourselves. And I would say that is the the
moment, the very first moment that we are contemplating and
maybe second guessing something or being curious about that
thing as it relates to permission.
I think that's the point we should be aware of and we catch
(23:59):
and we actually have to reframe it.
And so first of all, I would suggest joining Power Suit, head
to powersuit.com and check out amembership, even if it's for a
month, because we've got this class, a mini master class that
we delivered on real risk versusfake risk.
And we place extra emphasis on what we deem as fake risk of
(24:19):
like all the things that could go wrong, how we might get in
trouble, like all that stuff. It's just fake.
It's not real risk. Even looking silly is a fake
risk. Like it's short, it's sharp,
it's over. It's either doesn't exist or
it's like over very quickly and has very no impact.
But the real risk is often the risk of not doing anything at
all. And so we go through a framework
(24:40):
of how to identify it and a decision making framework so
that you can make choices where you're not going around in a
permission cycle for far too long and then ultimately doing
nothing. So that would be kind of my
action and and reframe that first question.
I like that and then my one would be practice in low stakes
(25:01):
situations. So one pickle I often get into
this is where I asked for permission.
It's really dumb. It's like I'm often tasked with
or put my hand up for like organizing AAA, organizing a
dinner out, organizing somethingand end up going like where's
your want to go? Where's convenient for everyone?
What does everyone need? And I'm practicing going.
We're going here, I'm booking here.
(25:22):
And if you get back to me by this time you're in.
And if you get back to me after this time, you're going to have
to sort yourself out and not waiting for everyone to tell me
what works for them in order forme to just make a decision if
I'm the one organizing. And I think there's a ton of
examples about like, and these are silly ones, but food,
timing, locations, events that we all organize throughout the
(25:46):
day where we sort of try and geteveryone's preferences across
our plates and then try and figure out what works to run
rather than going, if I'm the organizer, here's where we're
doing it and I'm just going to put it out there without waiting
for permission from everyone. Or here's how much it's going to
cost. Are you in or out?
Or if I'm getting tickets, you need to do this by the end.
There's something about those really low stakes everyday
(26:09):
situations where you just put out what you need to make it
happen rather than sort of waiting to make sure you adapt
to everyone else. I feel like there's like they're
like micro feminism tips in here.
Like I even think of our change from asking people when they're
free to chat, just saying, here's our calendar link.
Let's book book us. Like, isn't it funny how we used
(26:30):
to go, Oh, this feels a little bit strange asking the person we
want to talk to to kind of book through our meeting link, but we
just do now. Like it's a it was a it was a
form of like micro self leadership that now we've
normalized and there's no issueswith going off and fantastic
book of time that works for you here.
(26:51):
Yeah. Yeah, because I feel like
there's lots of hidden permission things in there of
like I'm about to drive into town to go to one meeting with
someone. Actually, to be fair, this was
like a combined and we both wanted to catch up, but we've
talked about this before the number of times people want to
meet with us and then we have togo out of our way, make it work.
That to me is a subset of permission seeking culture of
like, if I truly believe that I own my time, then I shouldn't be
(27:15):
adapting to make life. Well, not not adapting, but
changing everything and making it harder for me to make
something work better for other people.
So I do think we've got lots of micro opportunities.
I think, I mean, I don't know about you, but I'm really
terrible with even things like and I noticed Kyla's really good
at this. If there's a a couple of drinks
in the fridge and I don't know who's they are, I won't touch
them where she's like, they're in the fridge.
(27:37):
Like just live a little and justtake one if you want.
This is at home. This is not unlike a cafe or
like it's someone else's, you know, like at our holiday home
there's offer and like stuff like that, that I'm like, Oh no,
I need permission. Gosh, I need permission for a
lot that I'm like, what if I andI'm like, I could just replace
the can of Coke if someone else really wanted that can of Coke.
(27:57):
Like, it's just those silly little things about like, not
wanting to make any ripples on anyone else's life.
I'm going to leave us with a quote which I haven't done in
some time, but this feels again.So we start at the extreme and
her quote is your silence will not protect you.
But I think it is a really interesting mantra for all
arenas in our life where we juststay quiet rather than do the
(28:19):
thing or say the thing. And her.
This is Audrey Lorde, who wrote an essay back in the 70s and she
was diagnosed with breast cancerand confronting her own
mortality, no doubt. It's times like that where you
learn you have to advocate for yourself and often it's too
late. So I just think that's quite an
interesting thing that in any arena or silence will not
(28:43):
protect us or look out for us. Yeah, I really like that.
And let's just like remove some permission like, gosh, how
freeing is it to just go and? Do something Do.
Something quit your job. Everyone quit your job.
It's like. Don't, don't, don't, don't,
don't do that this way. Join a call.
Don't quit your job. At least you really want to quit
your job and you have a plan. Don't join a cult, but don't
(29:06):
para suit and. If you feel like you need to go
in a cult, join Power Suit. It is.
It is. Our line, it's our new marketing
line. Someone told me we were really
good at marketing today. I'm like, we are very good at
marketing. We're not a cult, but we scratch
that itch. I love it.
I love it. Anyway, check out parasuit.com
everyone. We're always available to chat.
(29:27):
If you do have questions about if the platform is for you, the
answer is yes. But anyway, and and we'll just
point you to how it how it is, but reach out anyway.
Permission and just join. Yeah, that's true.
Or, you know, I don't know if we.
Yeah. Anyway, it's true.
Fair. Fair.
OK, shut soon everyone. We'll catch in actually.
Sorry. I know you're wrapping up, but
(29:49):
there is another great one. Ask for your professional
development budget. Don't wait for permission.
Don't wait for someone to hand it to you.
The number of conversations I have with people, I'm like just
ask for it. Worst case scenario, you don't
have the budget, but they now know that you are really
committed to investing in yourself.
That is a great example of not waiting for permission that gosh
I wish more people not just for power suit but like those money
(30:11):
pots are just sitting there going to the same 10% of people
every year while we sit back waiting for permission for our
pipe slice of the pie. Love it.
Thank you for that. All right.
OK. All right.
You're welcome, Chris. You're welcome.
Thank you. Thank.
You all right, everyone? We'll catch you next time.
Bye.
Welcome to Power Up, the podcastthat uncovers the unique
challenges women leaders face today.
Join your hosts Nat and Kristen as we dive into the tough topics
and provide actionable insights you can apply right now.
Don't forget to hit subscribe soyou don't miss any episodes.
(00:38):
We're calling this episode Stop Waiting for a Green Light.
And this is a bit of a carry on from ask versus guest culture
Episode 151. Go back and listen to that.
So this idea kind of extends behaviors in what we have kind
of said. I think for the most part, we're
in a guest culture, but what happens is we also wait for
(00:59):
permission to act. So today is all about why are we
waiting for a green light? Why just so many of us do that
and where does it come from and what can we do about it?
But firstly, Nat, just putting you on the spot here.
Can you think of a time I don't know recently, either personally
or in a situation where someone was waiting for permission to do
(01:19):
something they kind of already knew they wanted to do?
I don't know. Did I give you permission to
even stop this conversation? What are you doing?
You're a great sport. I'm like, it doesn't always
apply to us, but actually I I thought of a good example, but
I'm going to let you share one first.
I feel like I see this all the time in power suit and I think
both of us are probably, I mean,if you start a company, you very
(01:41):
quickly get asking for permission beaten out of you
because if you ask for permission, you literally never
get off the start line. You every day we just have to
sort of keep asking and keep doing so.
I think we are just through sheer positioning kind of an
exception to this. I don't know if that's our
natural instinct, but I think itjust gets bean, like I said.
(02:02):
But I noticed this all the time with power suitors.
We talked to a lot of power suitors and potential power
suitors. And there's often this like
you're in the middle of a conversation, you're talking
about this big challenge facing someone.
And often what it boils down to is they're waiting for
permission, like they're waitingfor the invite to the meeting.
They're waiting to be asked to put their hand up for the role
(02:24):
or shoulder tapped the role or they're waiting for, oh gosh, I,
I feel like there's so many examples where the, the
conversation is phrased as no one's asked me or they didn't
shoulder tap me. It's not phrased as I'm waiting
for permission. But the language is passive.
It's like someone else has to act for me to do something.
(02:45):
And I'm constantly saying to people, why can't you just do
that? And it's just not something
that's occurred to them. No.
And we are going to share why very shortly.
But what I want, I was thinking of the last time I asked
permission to do something. And it was when I quit my job, I
felt comfortable in myself. It was something I knew I wanted
to do. I was like 100%, I'm going to
(03:06):
quit this job. And immediately there were two
people that came to mind, both men that I had to ask
permission, quit my job. And what I was doing was I was
seeking. Finishing one of them might be
your husband and there's a financial implication for him.
This is really embarrassing but it wasn't my husband because he
was the one to tell me he was the one to tell me to quit.
(03:26):
It was actually two other men, 1was an old boss who is a mentor
and the other was my dad. And I weirdly needed this
permission to quit my job even though I was going to do it or
wanted to do it, but it was likeI needed their validation to do
it. I needed them to tell me here's
what you must consider when you do this and have like that talk.
Which one I appreciated the other one, whatever, it was
(03:50):
fine. It was fine and I quit my job.
But I was like, that was the last time I basically sought
permission to do something. No, not the last time.
That was a very memorable one where I like needed, yeah, I
needed like, my dad's like, approval.
But anyway there I. Had the opposite, not the
opposite reaction, the opposite approach to that because I
definitely was worried when I quit my job that my parents
(04:13):
would be not stoked about it so I just did it and then said I
was did it afterwards and they were like great finally about
time get home. OK, well, I want to go right
back to primary school. And the University of Maryland
found that teachers give boys more instructional time and
direct feedback. We know that that goes right
(04:35):
through to the workplace about the type of feedback we receive.
And girls get praise for compliance, waiting our turn,
raising our hand, following the rules, coloring in the lines.
So it's no surprise that by the time we're in the workplace,
waiting for permission is a learned behavior.
I feel like I'm going to be jumping all over the show a
(04:56):
little bit today. I have literally been in
meetings since 8:30 this morning.
So this is me doing my prep during the podcast.
But I just want to go back to the asking permission to quit
our jobs because I don't think either of us did.
I actually think what we did there is we wanted sounding
boards and we wanted people to challenge our thinking before
making the decision. But I do think that's quite
(05:16):
different from feeling like, like, I think that asking for
permission that I've seen is there's no action.
There's no like, I'm going to dothis.
What do you think? It's like, I wouldn't even think
I could do this. It's not even on my plate until
someone tells me I can. I think it's a Gray area is what
we've discovered here. Because when I think about a
(05:37):
bouncing, what did you call it? A A sounding board.
Sounding board. When I think I'm a bouncing
board, when I think of a sounding board, I think of my
mum or I think of my husband andthey're my sound.
I've got my sounding boards, right, just like I am a sounding
board from my daughter or punching bag, one of the two.
But but do you? Think though, that sounding
(05:57):
boards what you may have been looking for, there was the Black
Hat thinking you specifically went after two people who may
not have thought the same thing.One yes, but no.
My dad was permission and it wasn't that I I was still going
to go and do it right, But what I what I had to do was explain
and justify and get his like Gold Star before doing it.
(06:21):
I'm not, it wouldn't have stopped me from doing it, but it
was a weird learned behavior of like a big life shift and
getting a dad to say OK and thenhaving him and his head go.
I bought in like it was stakeholder management that.
I'm gonna put a question mark over your example because I
definitely feel like the the permission culture that I've
(06:41):
seen is more we've had this and often it's a men who come to us
saying we advertise this job andin my team is the perfect person
for that job. But she didn't even apply.
And then they've gone and talkedto the woman and she goes, I
thought you'd shoulder tap me and she was experiencing that as
because I didn't get a shoulder tap, that meant I wasn't the
(07:03):
right person for the job. So I didn't put my name forward
where his expectation was. Here is the job.
Put your hand up for it. I love it that that something is
quite different from I was goingto do it anyway, but I wanted a
sounding board. And I and I do feel like yes,
there might be, you might have other issues, you might be
mucked up another one. Yeah, it was approval.
(07:23):
I was seeking approval and you wanted.
Approval, but you were going to do it anyway.
And my experience with this is it's far more passive.
It's like. OK, OK.
Like I'll be. Hang on.
We'll never know. We'll never know, by the way,
because I got permission, therefore I did it.
So no, no, no. Anyway, no, you're right.
You're right. I got you.
I got you. I got you.
I've experienced some friendshipgroups where someone will say, I
(07:44):
didn't get invited and I'm like to like a dinner where you saw
everyone else inviting themselves.
Like it's such a like the need for explicit permission.
Otherwise there's no action thatI find really.
Like, that's the crippling part of this.
This is the part that means the world moves forward and you're
sitting there waiting for someone to give you permission
(08:05):
to join in. And very good reason.
Again, I'm just going to keep digging into the research
because I think it's important we normalize it that this isn't
a thing that's our fault. And then we're going to go into
things we can do about it. And psychologists is caught
there. There's if you find yourself
approval seeking, which we've described a few scenarios in
which we are, they call it sociotrophy.
(08:26):
And this is a deep need for validation before acting, which
I would suggest this is how we're conditioned.
And it talks about high investment.
This is where you are making high investment in interpersonal
relationships. You have a strong desire for
social acceptance and a tendencyto be a people pleaser.
So there is a, you know, they'recalled this like act of this
(08:48):
need for validation and permission before acting, very
specifically before acting is that we tend to be people
pleasers. And it shows up again, not
because we were Born This Way, but because we have been.
I was thinking about all the ways that our worth has been
tied to our choices. And so we're constantly, our
(09:10):
choices are constantly either being questioned or undermined.
Therefore, we have this innate learned behavior to go, I can't
make a choice and take action. I need kind of approval to do
it. And I'm I'll just hear me out
here, like just little things like retire worth to choices we
make about being a stay at home mom versus being a working mom
(09:33):
or and you know, there's always this justification.
Oh, I'm so fortunate my husband works.
And so therefore like, Oh, I just, you know, you.
Ever tell Kristen you're so fortunate that your husband has
a job? And then it's like, oh, I'm, you
know, I had to use my bread. Like, there's this justification
for being a working mom. And there's like, our choices.
Choices for having, you know, what is it?
(09:57):
Beauty, beauty treatments on ourfaces and choices for not having
like it's like we always constantly are justifying the
choices for our about our bodiesand about our life and career
decisions because of the social conditioning.
Is that a question? To say on that, you're the
savant for our podcast. So I can't remember the last
time we spoke about this. I think that boiled down to when
(10:20):
you really think about it, it's because up until very recently,
we haven't had financial independence.
We actually haven't had control over our own lives.
We've had to be very tied to other people, to TV shows that
show this. And that means you need
permission. You literally needed permission
to do anything. First one I'm watching with Kyla
at the moment, The House of Guinness on Netflix.
(10:41):
I highly recommend, but watchingthe I'm not going to #spoiler
alert, but watching the way a will is divided and the
assumptions baked into where thewoman sat and what they did or
didn't get. And you just look and there was
a quote from one person on that show that she's like, my entire
(11:01):
life is now tied me into stayingmarried to someone.
Otherwise, I'm destitute effectively.
And just like that, I feel like when you think about our entire
history has been developing an incredible set of skills that
allows us to get the things we want through things like asking
for permission when we literallydid not have the power or
(11:22):
authority over our own lives. So I think it's an incredibly
powerful tool we've developed. It is just one that no longer
serves us. Now we do often have financial
independence and autonomy over our own lives.
The second TV. Hang on, hang on.
Episode 74 and episode 74. And that's not because I
remembered it is because I quickly looked it up and there's
Surprising facts about women andmoney.
(11:43):
Episode 74. OK, carry on.
The second TV show that I am watching because I loved it the
first time and I find this so interesting to re watch TV shows
that do not stand the test of time.
Also you're welcome podcast listeners that I've moved off
Instagram and into TV shows to give you my carefully thought
out research from I am re watching.
(12:03):
Have you ever watched the TV show Nashville?
Hang on, yes, it has the ACT actress that in the end was in
The White Lotus. So yes, I do remember this.
Yes, the mum. Yeah, the mum was the mum in
Nashville. Connie Connie Bruton or one of
the. Beautiful WAVY locks.
She was the first, I think she was the first mum in the White
Lotus. Anyway, I digress.
(12:25):
Cool. So this show came out, I don't
know when it came out, but it's sitting like 2015 and I am like
on my couch like with my blood boiling through most of it.
Like there's some good music. Well, average music.
No, it's fine, It's fine. But watching and I was talking
to Kyler about it that I was like, this is not ATV show that
(12:46):
was designed to show us how toxic these relationships were.
It's just in 2015 that was an accepted relationship dynamic.
And it was. It's like things like some dude
has had a baby with someone elseand his new girlfriend is
running around cooking all the meals and doing all the washing.
(13:06):
And but more particularly is theemotional permission that all
the women in the show, the men are throwing their toys, they're
refusing to talk. They are demanding what they
need. And all the women are running
around trying to smooth the edges.
And they are effectively having to ask permission to stay out of
danger, effectively with these men who are just completely
(13:28):
emotionally volatile, if not physically volatile, and whose
emotions they need to manage to get anything done in life or to
even have autonomy over their lives.
And they're in a relationship with a man.
And I just think if you're interested, just watch a show
like that and just see like thisis 10 years ago that I would
have watched this and not even clocked how terrible those
(13:50):
dynamics were. I think that's so interesting
because even if people don't relate exactly because that's
like really intense and some will relate.
But I think that also shows through in the workplace, like
the fact that we are often tasked with being the
peacemakers. And it's when I think about
silos and I think about the corporates I've been in, it's
been men that have been like kings of their own silos.
(14:13):
And it's been the women that have been running in between the
silos and trying to smooth, smooth stuff through.
But what it can look like, what it can look like, in addition to
kind of being needing to be the peacemaker and the diplomat is
stopping yourself, like questioning how you appear in
their eyes and if I side with this person or not with this
person or yet not putting your hand up for XYZ.
(14:37):
Yeah. Promotions projects, I mean,
yeah. Some of these examples were bad,
but I always find the more mundane ones, the serious ones,
because it's things like these examples being these women won't
say yes to job opportunities without their partner's
permission, whereas the men willjust go and do it.
Whereas the women have to make sure it works around their
partner's schedule and otherwisethe man will just blow up and
(15:00):
like not speak to them. And you're like, I mean, it's
dramatic, but it's like a very clearly, it was such a
normalized concept that I didn'teven notice it when I face watch
them. But we do, I mean, it is still
very real, even if it's not realin our lives because we run the
how to say no workshop as an example.
It's also mini master class in power suit.
(15:21):
And quite often the barrier at the end for women is that the,
you know, well, my husband's just not going to do it or he's
not going to, you know, put up with my boundary.
It's like, oh God, quite often, exactly.
Quite often we're like, OK, how might we?
What is the thing called when you're like like someones
(15:42):
brainwashed and you have to reprogram their brains?
What's it called? Deprogramming.
No it's not. There's like a thing.
Red Pilling, blue Pilling, red Pilling, some pills.
Quick, quick story time because I was looking at Simone Biles
and the fact that she needed, asyou recall, in Tokyo Olympics
where she pulled out of the Olympics, there was an uproar.
(16:05):
There was an uproar. What a transgression because who
gave her permission to make a decision about her body and her
choices, right? Like it was like, hang on a
minute, you owe us these medals.And so, you know, I was kind of
thinking about her, which let merelate to my very, very non
professional sporting background.
(16:27):
Why am I getting to this where my physiotherapist was a cult
member of the Moonies in the States.
He was actually in a cult for many, many years.
This. Is a broadcast topic on its own.
I'm living so. Much.
Yeah. And he would tell me about this
and after we did our physio, youknow, things he would like crack
out because I was fascinated, ofcourse, love the drama.
(16:48):
And he would crack out his bookslike binders.
And he had newspaper clippings and there were stories on the
Moonies. This is what the cult was
called. And he was sent to Florida.
And so then he eventually got out of this cult.
I can't recall how this is many moons ago.
Get it, Moonies. Anyway, so I'm laughing at
(17:11):
myself. I'm so funny.
And then and then he turned intoa person that was hired by the
parents to go kidnap their kids out of cults and he would kidnap
them and put them in barns and reprogram them.
And there was a word for it to actually start to go hang on.
You do not need. You are no longer controlled by
those around you and by this cult.
(17:33):
And I guess that's what we're trying to do.
Well, however, just deprogram. Unfortunately, this social
conditioning of needing to wait and to ask.
I love that. I hope he asked for permission
from the parents before he went and kidnapped.
Yeah, well, they were. He was, what he was doing was
illegal. Obviously he can't kidnap, but
(17:53):
he was, it was a it was an underground economy because at
the time their parents were willing to to pay for, you know,
their kids back. Yeah.
I feel like even that going backto the Simone Biles example,
even though I'd rather just go down this cult conversation, but
we're going to roll back. I've seen the same with the
likes of Taylor Swift and actually a lot of women online.
(18:16):
And again, now we're going back to more comfortable territory of
Instagram reels. But the number of Instagram
reels I've seen where it'll be some guy saying, oh, she needs
to know that she's never going to pick up a man if she does
this. And now of course there's the
pushback of women doing whateverthey do over it, where they're
like, and why do we care? Like, but what I think is
interesting that that that ability for a group of people to
(18:40):
think they can go, oh, you're not going to get anything if you
behave like that. Like I get to decide that for
you. If you a Taylor Swift who wants
to have your cats around you anddisrespect whatever notion about
the world that I have, you're not going to find a man.
And that the now it's only been recently that a lot of women
push back and go like, why wouldI want to, if that was the
(19:01):
condition, be under to find him like and but again, very, very
recent, up until recently, we just watched that and be like,
Oh no, she's never going to finda man.
No, because again, the dream. But I feel like that's that,
that's the, I think the full overlay of a lot of the stuff is
that concept of male gays. And this is not a bad thing.
(19:23):
This is not anything that men dowrong.
This is that women have been socialized to really try and
attract the approval and permission from men and tailor a
lot of our lives to that, which is why these Instagram reels
around, she's not going to, she hasn't hit our criteria for
being chosen. Thus she will not be is really
(19:46):
interesting because you don't really see that in reverse.
You don't see women coming out going oh, he decided to do that.
He's not going to get a girlfriend.
You know, like more so now, but not that long ago.
You know, what I think is, do you know what I think is even
more insidious is this language,and I think I've described it
(20:06):
above, that we've learned that our behavior maybe hasn't led to
anything, therefore we've stopped behaving.
So obviously we're calling that out, but it can.
Come through and things like, I'm just waiting for the right
moment. I don't feel ready enough.
I'm just going to. It's quite often like I just
need XYZ. Like I need another course.
I need another year under my devout, I need another whatever.
(20:27):
And we know I think 98% of people leaders who've stepped or
successful people when you chat with them and I mean that in
terms of like hierarchy and roles and whatever have never
felt ready for the big step ever.
Like not once. So they're like, Oh yeah, I kind
of did XYZ and then I took the thing.
So we talked a lot about that mentality, but I think those
lies that we tell ourselves, or I'm waiting for the right
(20:48):
moment, the perfect moment got us in so many arenas of our life
that's I'm going to this is it can be somewhat of a what is it?
This is not a very nice title, but there's this concept of
learned helpfulness, and it can be a little bit of what is it
controversial? Learned helplessness.
Yeah. Learned helplessness.
What did I say? Helpfulness.
(21:09):
That too. It's both.
I'm helpful. I'm helpless.
Learned helplessness. This Martin Seligaman because
original research found that when we experience enough
situations where actions don't change outcomes, we start to
internalize the idea that actingdoesn't matter.
So I think it's this like we've been talked over enough times or
(21:29):
we didn't get the right job or our ideas were owned by someone
else. We were passed over da da da.
We've just internalized it all and it's like it's almost again
in the drama triangle of victim mode.
It's like I've been burned before and so I'm not going to
bother anymore, you know? Like, no wars have ever been won
that way. No change has ever been changed
(21:50):
that way, you know. When I think also it's that idea
that doing it one way, if it didn't work, that means you
can't do it at all versus what our power suit philosophy is, is
let's experiment with another way.
Let's tweak our behavior a little bit, try something
slightly different and see if itresults in a different outcome.
Because I do feel like, I mean, I've just gotten off the phone
with a person in Korea who may be listening.
(22:13):
Hello, hi Korea. And like talking about different
cultures as well and, and how the gender gender differences
play out with having, you know, like women walking into
workplaces. And this is not just Korea.
This is around the world have very different expectations.
And depending on if it's a multinational company, depending
(22:34):
if it's a local company, depending on the type of
industry, a companies in a womanwalking in and just assuming
permission will be interpreted quite differently from a man
doing the same. And that's a whole other overlay
on this, which, yeah, which is is outside of our control, but
we can to control some things. And I think that's what we want
(22:55):
to finish off with. Other than what have we
traversed Terrible TV shows, cults, lot of research, dived
back into the reels. But I think one of the things
that's really important with this asking for permission is
like, let's figure out ways we can stop waiting and start just
(23:15):
taking that permission. So I don't know if you've got
any thoughts on something that someone who's listening today
might be able to sort of take that assume ownership unless
otherwise. Yeah.
Well, I, I, I like that. And I think often what I find,
what I've learned both of myselfand others as that it often
starts with a question because you know, you're thinking
(23:38):
through things through in your head and you're like, what if I
get this wrong or am I allowed? And there's often questions we
ask ourselves. And I would say that is the the
moment, the very first moment that we are contemplating and
maybe second guessing something or being curious about that
thing as it relates to permission.
I think that's the point we should be aware of and we catch
(23:59):
and we actually have to reframe it.
And so first of all, I would suggest joining Power Suit, head
to powersuit.com and check out amembership, even if it's for a
month, because we've got this class, a mini master class that
we delivered on real risk versusfake risk.
And we place extra emphasis on what we deem as fake risk of
(24:19):
like all the things that could go wrong, how we might get in
trouble, like all that stuff. It's just fake.
It's not real risk. Even looking silly is a fake
risk. Like it's short, it's sharp,
it's over. It's either doesn't exist or
it's like over very quickly and has very no impact.
But the real risk is often the risk of not doing anything at
all. And so we go through a framework
(24:40):
of how to identify it and a decision making framework so
that you can make choices where you're not going around in a
permission cycle for far too long and then ultimately doing
nothing. So that would be kind of my
action and and reframe that first question.
I like that and then my one would be practice in low stakes
(25:01):
situations. So one pickle I often get into
this is where I asked for permission.
It's really dumb. It's like I'm often tasked with
or put my hand up for like organizing AAA, organizing a
dinner out, organizing somethingand end up going like where's
your want to go? Where's convenient for everyone?
What does everyone need? And I'm practicing going.
We're going here, I'm booking here.
(25:22):
And if you get back to me by this time you're in.
And if you get back to me after this time, you're going to have
to sort yourself out and not waiting for everyone to tell me
what works for them in order forme to just make a decision if
I'm the one organizing. And I think there's a ton of
examples about like, and these are silly ones, but food,
timing, locations, events that we all organize throughout the
(25:46):
day where we sort of try and geteveryone's preferences across
our plates and then try and figure out what works to run
rather than going, if I'm the organizer, here's where we're
doing it and I'm just going to put it out there without waiting
for permission from everyone. Or here's how much it's going to
cost. Are you in or out?
Or if I'm getting tickets, you need to do this by the end.
There's something about those really low stakes everyday
(26:09):
situations where you just put out what you need to make it
happen rather than sort of waiting to make sure you adapt
to everyone else. I feel like there's like they're
like micro feminism tips in here.
Like I even think of our change from asking people when they're
free to chat, just saying, here's our calendar link.
Let's book book us. Like, isn't it funny how we used
(26:30):
to go, Oh, this feels a little bit strange asking the person we
want to talk to to kind of book through our meeting link, but we
just do now. Like it's a it was a it was a
form of like micro self leadership that now we've
normalized and there's no issueswith going off and fantastic
book of time that works for you here.
(26:51):
Yeah. Yeah, because I feel like
there's lots of hidden permission things in there of
like I'm about to drive into town to go to one meeting with
someone. Actually, to be fair, this was
like a combined and we both wanted to catch up, but we've
talked about this before the number of times people want to
meet with us and then we have togo out of our way, make it work.
That to me is a subset of permission seeking culture of
like, if I truly believe that I own my time, then I shouldn't be
(27:15):
adapting to make life. Well, not not adapting, but
changing everything and making it harder for me to make
something work better for other people.
So I do think we've got lots of micro opportunities.
I think, I mean, I don't know about you, but I'm really
terrible with even things like and I noticed Kyla's really good
at this. If there's a a couple of drinks
in the fridge and I don't know who's they are, I won't touch
them where she's like, they're in the fridge.
(27:37):
Like just live a little and justtake one if you want.
This is at home. This is not unlike a cafe or
like it's someone else's, you know, like at our holiday home
there's offer and like stuff like that, that I'm like, Oh no,
I need permission. Gosh, I need permission for a
lot that I'm like, what if I andI'm like, I could just replace
the can of Coke if someone else really wanted that can of Coke.
(27:57):
Like, it's just those silly little things about like, not
wanting to make any ripples on anyone else's life.
I'm going to leave us with a quote which I haven't done in
some time, but this feels again.So we start at the extreme and
her quote is your silence will not protect you.
But I think it is a really interesting mantra for all
arenas in our life where we juststay quiet rather than do the
(28:19):
thing or say the thing. And her.
This is Audrey Lorde, who wrote an essay back in the 70s and she
was diagnosed with breast cancerand confronting her own
mortality, no doubt. It's times like that where you
learn you have to advocate for yourself and often it's too
late. So I just think that's quite an
interesting thing that in any arena or silence will not
(28:43):
protect us or look out for us. Yeah, I really like that.
And let's just like remove some permission like, gosh, how
freeing is it to just go and? Do something Do.
Something quit your job. Everyone quit your job.
It's like. Don't, don't, don't, don't,
don't do that this way. Join a call.
Don't quit your job. At least you really want to quit
your job and you have a plan. Don't join a cult, but don't
(29:06):
para suit and. If you feel like you need to go
in a cult, join Power Suit. It is.
It is. Our line, it's our new marketing
line. Someone told me we were really
good at marketing today. I'm like, we are very good at
marketing. We're not a cult, but we scratch
that itch. I love it.
I love it. Anyway, check out parasuit.com
everyone. We're always available to chat.
(29:27):
If you do have questions about if the platform is for you, the
answer is yes. But anyway, and and we'll just
point you to how it how it is, but reach out anyway.
Permission and just join. Yeah, that's true.
Or, you know, I don't know if we.
Yeah. Anyway, it's true.
Fair. Fair.
OK, shut soon everyone. We'll catch in actually.
Sorry. I know you're wrapping up, but
(29:49):
there is another great one. Ask for your professional
development budget. Don't wait for permission.
Don't wait for someone to hand it to you.
The number of conversations I have with people, I'm like just
ask for it. Worst case scenario, you don't
have the budget, but they now know that you are really
committed to investing in yourself.
That is a great example of not waiting for permission that gosh
I wish more people not just for power suit but like those money
(30:11):
pots are just sitting there going to the same 10% of people
every year while we sit back waiting for permission for our
pipe slice of the pie. Love it.
Thank you for that. All right.
OK. All right.
You're welcome, Chris. You're welcome.
Thank you. Thank.
You all right, everyone? We'll catch you next time.
Bye.
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