Episode 38: Unwrapping the Pressure: What the Holidays Really Feel Like for Moms

Episode Description:

This week, we’re talking about the side of the holidays no one puts on the family cards. The joy, yes — but also the pressure, the mental load, and that feeling like moms are the ones holding the glitter-covered ship together.

We dig into family expectations, hosting anxiety, the gift-giving spiral, and the myth of the perfect magical Christmas. We also talk about what our kids actually remember, how to set boundaries without guilt, and the small ways we’re simplifying this year so the season feels like connection instead of chaos.

If you've ever felt like you love the holidays but you also need a nap from them… you’re in the right place.

💗 Pink Spotlight

Each week, we highlight a moment, product, or practice that’s bringing us joy:

Kristina: A fresh mobile spray tan from @glamandtan. She’ll come right to your home anywhere in Connecticut for $75–$95 depending on location, or visit her West Hartford studio for $65. Kristina loves the at-home option so she never has to leave the house. glamandtanct.com

Christina: Renting a designer bag from Vivrelle — a fun way to switch up accessories during the holiday season without the commitment. You can use code CHRISTINATARABISHY to get your first month FREE and try it out. (Updated offer from what I shared on air… and even better!)

🌸 Things We Mentioned

• Disposable plates and silverware that actually looks real! Your guests might ask you if they should throw this away!
• Christina's "Dressed Up" French Toast Recipe: 
  • Ingredients:
    • 10 slices of thick white bread cut into small bite-sized pieces (texas toast is best)
    •  1 8ounce package of cheddar cheese
    •  6 eggs
    •  2 cups milk (or milk substitute)
    •  1/2 cup melted butter Salt to taste
    •  Glass pan
  • Directions:
    • Add layer of bread pieces to pan
    •  Top with thin layer of cheese
    •  Alternate bread/cheese layers
    •  Beat eggs until foamy
    •  Add milk to egg mixture
    •  Pour milk/egg mixture over bread/cheese, make sure all bread is evenly coated
    •  Put pan in refrigerator overnight to soak (or at least 4 hours)
    •  When ready to bake, add melted butter on top of bread
    •  Bake uncovered at 325 degrees for 1 hour
    •  **Optional: add bacon crumbles and/or cinnamon and sugar before serving**
    •  Serve with maple syrup! Enjoy!

Want to share your own traditions or the pressures you’re letting go of this season? Send us a DM or join the Inner Circle chat — we’d love to hear how you're finding your pink again through the holidays. 💞

Join the Conversation

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Don't forget:  Leave us a written review on Apple Podcasts, DM us your address, and we’ll send you a light pink beaded bracelet with a gold pink flamingo charm—just to say thanks for being here. 💕

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Episode Transcript

(00:00):
I am Christina and I'm t, andthis is the Pretty and Pink
Again podcast where motherhoodmeets rediscovery.
Hey, happy Monday.
How are you?
I'm good.
How are you?

(00:20):
Good.
Recovering from our crazyweekend.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Busy weekend.
I know.
I literally did not even have asip.
Actually, I sipped on a beer fora second, but then I changed my
mind this weekend and I stillfeel hung over just because I
went to bed past midnight.
That's where we're at right now.
We didn't go to an after partythis year.

(00:40):
No, we didn't even have an afterparty home.
I know.
We're so lame.
We had such an amazing time atthe annual Connecticut
Children's Gala, which is such afun night and it just means so
much.
It's a foundation that just hasdone so much for our community
and always raises so much money.
But they put on this annualgala.
There's always a theme.
A lot of our friends are part ofthe different committees to put

(01:03):
it together.
And this year's theme waswicked.
So if you didn't see our littledress reveal, it worked out that
we were like alphabet andGlinda.
I thought the entertainment thisyear was excellent too.
I loved the Broadway singers.
It wasn't just like a longprogram.
Mm-hmm.
It was a very touching Yes.
Event.
Everything was woven together soseamlessly.
Yeah.
And Wicked is so huge right now,too.

(01:23):
So there was like lots ofperformances and it was just, it
was such a fun, amazing night.
Yeah.
So they raised a ton of money.
I could not get over.
Generosity of the people thatdonated it was incredible.
It was really special.
And so yeah, we're recoveringfrom that.
'cause it's Monday, the gala wason Saturday.
It was just a long day.
But it goes by so fast too.
I feel like an outing like that,you just blink and Yeah, it's

(01:45):
over.
But it was very beautifully welldone.
It was so fun.
Great job girls.
I know.
It was so fun.
So it was so fun.
I can't wait to hear what nextyear's will be like.
That's like our one big winterfall event.
I feel like there's, and theneverybody goes into like
hibernation.
Before that.
It's a good time to have a, anevent like that.
'cause any later in November youget into the holidays into Thes,
which is what we're gonna bediscussing today.

(02:08):
So we figured we're in November.
Thanksgiving is coming up thenChristmas and New Year's.
It's, as everybody says, themost magical time of the year.
It is the season.
But we wanna know what does thismean for you?
Mm-hmm.
The one that is going to makethe magic happen.
Yes.
What does that mean for themagic maker?

(02:28):
It's stressful to be a mom inlike the holiday season and I'm
dipping my toe into it a littlebit, but there's a lot to do and
a lot to live up to, and there'sjust, there's a lot of pressure.
There's a lot to do when you'realready.
Doing a lot.
There already is a lot to do.
So now you have a lot more todo.
And nobody wants to spend timewith family and cook and clean

(02:54):
and make things joyous for thepeople around them with a chip
on their shoulder.
And hate that they're doing itand I never wanted to be one of
those people that said, I justwanna get through the holidays.
I just wanna get through theholidays.
I hate that phrase.
I know, because the holidays aresuch a special time of year.
It's supposed to be so magicaland it's a time where you

(03:15):
usually get to connect and seeyour family and you get to eat
well, and it's it's also verynostalgic.
Yes.
It's very, it's time of yearthat brings you back to things
that you love.
And also it's a time thatreminds you of how far away
you've come from the things thatyou love.
That's true.
So it can be a really sad timeof year too, for many people.
For sure.
Many people who have financialtroubles, it's a very stressful

(03:36):
time for them.
If you are a parent that hasmultiple children who you're
trying to buy gifts for and keepup with the other kids in the
class.
And if your children believe inSanta Claus, if you have kids in
the car, turn this down, andother kids are getting all these
elaborate gifts from Santa Clausand you give your child one or
two and your kids are like, howcome Santa didn't do this for
us?

(03:56):
There's a lot of pressureinvolved in gift giving.
There's also pressure involvedin where you spend your time.
Yeah.
If you have in-laws, if you'relucky enough to be loved by lots
of people mm-hmm.
you have to split your time.
Like a double-edged sword.
No, I love the way that you saidthat too.
'cause it's, yeah.
It's hard to, if I say it anyother way, I'll just be
irritated.
Yeah.

(04:17):
Very politically correct.
So I know we wanted to unpackall these like tough topics.
Yeah.
The holidays can definitely behard.
And why do you think though,that they're supposed to be
joyful?
It's another one of those thingswhere we say it's supposed to
be, it's supposed to be, they'resupposed to be magical.
They're supposed to be joyful.
Why do you think that there isso much pressure you just named?

(04:40):
Obviously it could befinancially stressful, you're
dividing your time.
Anytime you do anything good inlife, even remember your wedding
day anytime anything goodhappens to you, it requires
preparation.
Yes.
Lots of moving parts.
And if you are the person doingthe work mm-hmm.
that's stressful for you.
Like your kids wake up onChristmas morning, they're
opening all their Christmasgifts.

(05:01):
You wanna see them enjoyingtheir toys but all I have in the
back of my head is I want tohave a magic person picking up
the wrapping paper and thestuffing and cleaning it all up
simultaneously.
It's hard to make the magichappen, yeah.
But I also think that.
We're thinking of it as like theholiday and it's okay, you're
thinking of Christmas if that'swhat holiday you celebrate, but

(05:23):
it's a season.
It's it's a marathon.
It's not just, it's not just oneday or two days.
There's so much going on forabout six weeks and we're
nearing that, that mark rightnow where there's so much
preparation.
There's holiday events, there'sholiday parties at school, you
have to get gifts for a milliondifferent people, for teachers,

(05:43):
for your friends, for yourfamily, for your own kids.
The list is just ongoing.
And until the crash out at theend of the year.
One year for Halloween.
Our family dressed up asChristmas.
So I dressed up as a present.
Nick dressed up as a kid onChristmas morning.
Vincent was, Santa Mila was areindeer.
Ava was Cindy Lou who, andJoseph didn't wanna participate,

(06:06):
so he was wearing this like allblack costume.
I remember that.
So I said, Joseph, you're thegrim reefer.
Yes.
I remember that.
The credit card bill after theholidays.
There you go.
And it was amazing.
He kept telling everybody, I'mthe credit card bill.
Yeah, I'm the credit card bill.
Yeah.
The darkness.
The darkness that comes after.
Yeah.
But what is one thing that youlove about the holidays and then
one thing that instantlystresses you out?

(06:29):
Okay, so I love hosting theholidays here.
Mm-hmm.
That is one thing I love aboutthe holidays.
I have a big open house onChristmas Eve.
I love hosting the holidayshere, but what stresses me out
is when we can't be here and wehave to pack up the kids and go
elsewhere on Christmas Day, likethat sort of stresses me out.

(06:52):
And I think that part about theholidays is a little bit of a
give and take.
Like I can't just always behome, even though it works for
me in my family, I have to belike flexible and make things
work for our family members whowanna see us too.
So I feel like that's one thing,just maybe specific to
Christmas.
I like being home and I likehosting.

(07:12):
I like cooking, but it stressesme out to pack up my family and
go elsewhere.
Go elsewhere.
Yeah.
I love, I'm with you.
I love.
People at my house because I'mlike a creature of habit.
I like being home, especiallywith the kids.
I just find it so much easier tostay on schedule if somebody's
cranky, if they need a nap, it'sjust like easier.
You're at your house, and I dofeel like it's much harder to

(07:36):
leave with the kids and makesure you have all of the things.
It's getting a little easier asthey're getting older, but
you're off schedule.
The car rides are long.
I find all of that extremelytaxing and hard, so I'm with you
on that.
Where it's I like to have peoplein my own house, but then that's
like a double-edged swordbecause then you are the one
hosting and there's so much todo during that day.

(07:58):
There's so much to prep for.
So it's either way you look atit, you're either like leaving
the house and getting a breakfrom cooking and cleaning at
your own house.
But then there's so much stressthat comes along with packing
everybody up and running aroundand making sure that you're
getting there on time and makingsure everybody's happy.
All of that, or you're homedoing all of the work.

(08:20):
You know what I mean?
And maybe your kids are a littlebit happier because you're not
having to travel all over theplace, but there's so much
stress with hosting at yourhouse.
So I am with you where it's it'sa give and a take.
It is.
I wish I could tell you likeI've mastered.
Entertaining.
I think I've mastered certainthings.
I know certain dishes work well.
I know like how late I can buycertain foods, how early I have

(08:43):
to buy.
Other ones.
I can alleviate, like now thatwe have different, food delivery
things, you don't necessarilyhave to be rushing out to the
store to get things Right.
But food can be very expensive.
It can.
So what we've actually starteddoing, especially with my
husband's side of the family,which is a lot larger, there's a
lot of siblings and then there'sa lot of kids underneath there.

(09:03):
We're like nearing 10 almost.
So it's just starting to be alot of people.
And what we started to do, evenwhen we host, we will sometimes
do the main.
Dish or like the main event.
And then everybody else willcontribute in other ways.
Like maybe somebody's bringingsome of the side dishes,
somebody's bringing dessert,somebody's maybe bringing some

(09:23):
of the beverages or drinks, buteverybody kind of divides and
conquers this way.
It doesn't feel like it's all onone person.
Oh, I love that.
And so that has helped a lotbecause, but because even with
one thing sometimes, if we'redoing the Turkey, even that is
still a lot, it's still just, alot of responsibility to just do
the one kind of main dish.
But it has helped a lot.

(09:44):
Yeah.
And.
That.
So that's worked for our family,so that's great.
Yeah.
Do you do like a kids' table, anadult's table?
We haven't had to do that yet,but we're nearing where there's
so many people where we'redefinitely gonna have to divide,
and that's gonna require likebringing in additional tables,
because there's not every,there's not enough seating with
what we currently have.
So it's a lot.
Yeah.
Yeah.

(10:04):
It is a lot.
It is a lot.
Yeah.
I do Christmas Eve.
And I don't do a.
Like a traditional sit down,down, down dinner.
And everybody always ends uparound the island.
Yeah.
And I think that's why I likeChristmas Eve so much.
Yep.
Because it's a little chaotic.
Yep.
Which I'm a little chaotic andthings can come out of the oven
and you can eat the food whenit's hot and you don't have to
worry about the timing.
'cause I get very stressed, lovethat.
Stressed out about okay, if thepork tenderloin comes out at

(10:26):
6:00 PM then it has to sit for25 minutes and then we have to
wait to cut it.
Yeah.
And then I'm getting thevegetables out and I only have
two ovens, which I'm luckyenough to have two ovens.
But how are you supposed to haveeverything hot?
And I get you, yeah.
And then everybody has to sitand stop what you're doing and
sit like it's, that to me is alittle stressful.
I completely agree with you.
And I like the, it's a littlebit more non-pressure and it's a

(10:47):
little bit more socializing.
And I like that you can eat andpick when you want.
Yeah.
People can come in and out.
Yeah.
If my cousins have in-laws andthey have to go to their wives
or husband's side of the family,they can do that.
They can come, the kids can allsee each other.
'Cause also, like I.
I have really fond memories ofwhen I was a kid, we would go to
my dad's sister's house everyyear on Christmas Eve, and it

(11:07):
was like a party, it was my likefavorite holiday.
And then Christmas day we wouldjust get to stay home.
My mom would cook, probably mygrandparents came over.
But I have very nostalgicmemories to that.
And my husband has like this, asa, the same setup.
He would do like a big funfamily Christmas Eve and then
Christmas morning wake up.
And so I'm trying to, I lovethat, replicate that for my

(11:28):
kids, but yet, and not justshove my own traditions on them,
like make our own.
So I love that because I'm now,especially being a parent, I
feel like I want my kids to beable to wake up on Christmas and
be at their house and be able toopen their gifts and not have to
rush out.
And so I do like a Christmas,like Christmas Eve is like the

(11:52):
night, that's like the night.
That's like fun.
It's a kickoff.
And then I like the slower athome Christmas morning with the
family, eating with the family.
I hate rushing around onChristmas day.
I feel like that's so hard.
But when you're trying to see alot of people and work around
other schedules, sometimes youdon't get the, those
opportunities, you have to gowith what everybody else is

(12:12):
doing and make some sacrifices.
So it is really hard.
I know.
So what would you say to alistener that said I have to
split my time.
What would you suggest to anewlywed, because that's usually
when it starts.
It is like when you're anewlywed and when you have new
kids.
What do you, what would you sayto somebody that's I have to
split my time?
How do I work on splitting mytime?

(12:32):
It's because you have to splityour time.
Yes.
It's so hard, and I think itdepends on how far your family
probably lives to you in thecloseness of how easily you can
get to something.
But I think that, oh, likeyou're saying, if you can do two
in a day or Yeah.
I think that's tough becauseI've been there as a kid where
you're getting shuffled all overthe place.
We have to see this side of thefamily, we have to see this side

(12:52):
of the family and it's a lot ofrunning around.
And I think that's really hard.
But I think that.
Starting traditions early is sohelpful.
Mm-hmm.
We have not really done this asa family on either side, and I
think we're starting to run intoan issue where.
We need to make sure that if wehave whatever the holiday is

(13:14):
that we're going to celebrate asa family, it's ironed out ahead
of time.
Mm-hmm.
So that everybody is availablefor that.
Everybody else can tell theirin-laws or their families that
this is where they're going forthat holiday, but it's hard
because you wanna be able tosplit.
So I think in some instances youalmost have to split the
holiday, like not the actualday.

(13:36):
Like you're going here and thenyou're going there.
Like you're committing to maybespending Thanksgiving with one
family and then Christmas withanother family.
I think putting yourself in theposition where you're trying to
run all over the place and.
It's so hard to do that, butthen it's also really sad not to
see another side of your, thefamily when you're used to

(13:57):
seeing that it would be hard forme not to see my parents on
Christmas because we're doingsomething else.
So it's, I don't think thatthere is a right answer.
I know.
Remember, you have to just tryto, I remember my first
Christmas that I lived withNick.
We were like just married.
And I woke up at his house onChristmas morning and Nick gave
me my gift and I gave him hisgift.
And he's like, all right, let'sget in the car.

(14:18):
I know you're dying to go toyour parents' house.
And I was like, I know, I'msorry know.
But it was my first Christmas, Iwasn't at home and my little
sister was still, I think shewas like 11 or 12, she was still
little and my other sister wasthere and I had like major fomo.
Yeah.
So I don't think Nick and Istarted our own traditions right
away I think, no, we didn't.
I think probably it took untilwe had Joseph, until we were

(14:39):
like, yes, okay, what are wedoing now?
Yes.
Like we're family.
What are we doing now?
Yeah.
We did the same thing where wewould sometimes even split
because we were like, I wanna gowith my family.
You wanna go with your familywas, and it was fine.
But when you start to have kids,you're also trying to protect
your family, right?
Because you now have your ownunit of a family, but you're
also trying to appease.

(15:01):
Your other sides of your familyand maybe some siblings and
parents, and it is hard.
So I think that's, I know it'sso hard, it's so hard to be
fair, right?
Because you wanna be able tospend time with the families,
but then you sometimes end upsacrificing your own self and
your own, like happiness.

(15:21):
Because if you are justconstantly running around
worrying about making sure yousee everybody, you're not really
in the moment.
That's very tricky.
So sometimes 50 50 doesn'talways mean.
Equal.
No, but it means it's fair.
I know.
Yep.
I think we, what we had tried todo was we would rotate, right?
So sometimes we would do likeChristmas with one side of the

(15:44):
family, or Christmas Eve withone side of the family and just
and we were like, oh, it's fairbecause you like to be at your
house for Christmas Eve, and sodo I.
And so we tried rotating, butwhen you have kids, and then
when you have other people,other siblings that then have
in-laws, it's just, it just getstoo crazy.
So I think it does almost likemarking a territory of we're

(16:07):
gonna do Christmas.
This is going to be our holidaythat we do.
Everyone's welcome here.
We've even tried to do thatwhere we keep it, I liked your
word, like the open house.
Where you're like, mm-hmm.
everyone can come over to ourhouse and you don't have, you
can be an in-law from anotherside of the family.
Everybody can come here thisway.
Everybody gets to see each otherand everybody doesn't feel like

(16:28):
they're having to choose oneside of the family or the other
side of the family.
So I like that.
I feel like Christmas Eve allowsyou to do that, but even on
Christmas, I feel like that's anice, like open door, just yeah,
come when you can.
Everybody can come here.
It's harder.
But I think sometimes whenyou're.
If you keep it that likeopenness where you're saying
like there's no sit down dinnerwhere you need all of the

(16:49):
seating and you need all of thethings.
If you just keep it like you'rehosting a party mm-hmm.
and you can keep people comingin and out and there's no set
time and you're gonna have foodout as the day is going, then it
alleviates some of thatpressure.
So I like that.
And that's how I like to do aholiday.
Like I don't need the sit downformal dinner.
I just wanna be with my people,yeah.

(17:10):
I would.
I agree.
So for me personally, mymother-in-law likes to host
Thanksgiving.
And that's a sit down thing.
Yeah.
And I don't lo like you, I don'tlove the sit down.
So it actually works outperfectly that's her holiday,
right?
And it's good because she knowsin advance that's what she
hosts.
That's where we go.
It works out.
And then we get to stay home forChristmas Eve and Christmas Day.

(17:32):
They're welcome to come here.
For Christmas Eve and ChristmasDay.
They right.
They usually do.
And then if they do, they'llcome to my parents' house and
then my kids get to have bothgrandparents together there.
Now this arrangement didn't justhappen magically.
No.
This took like compromise and mehaving to ask my husband like,
where do you wanna be?
What's important to you?

(17:54):
It's important to you to seeyour extended family.
Then this is where we'll be.
It's important to me to notschlep my kids around on
Christmas day.
This is where we'll be.
So you have to have like openconversations around this.
For sure.
You can't And you have to beflexible too.
Yes.
Because.
Really, if it was just my way,my husband would not be happy.
And if it was only his way, Iwouldn't be happy.
So you have to have someflexibility.

(18:16):
It is certainly not perfect.
There are also other holidays inthe year that you have to like,
accommodate fair.
Fair and equal.
But one tip, like if we don'tsee my parents and my sisters
for Thanksgiving, my mom alwayshas us over either the Sunday
before or the Sunday after andmy sisters come and my sister's
kids come and we have a nicefamily dinner so we can all be

(18:36):
together for a meal aroundThanksgiving.
Same thing with Christmas.
If we don't see my in-laws,she'll have us up for a family
meal just trying to do somethingelse so we can see.
Yep.
Somebody there.
So we try to figure it out.
I think that sounds so great.
But I'm also one and I lovethat, but I'm also like a very
nostalgic person, and I thinkthat this is coming a little bit
with age too, where I still,that would still bum me out if I

(19:01):
still couldn't see my side ofthe family on the actual
holiday.
I don't think that would'vebothered me, but I think that
now that there's kids involvedin all of it, it's just, and so
it goes back to why there's somuch pressure.
It's sometimes it's internalbecause you are just, it's, you
set up in your head this idea oflike how the day is gonna be and

(19:21):
the morning and all of it.
And yes, you can celebrateChristmas on another day but
there's just something aboutthose actual days.
And so I think that sometimes iswhy people have a hard time
because of course, that's why Isaid this magical plan didn't
just come together soseamlessly.
No.
Yes, it's a sacrifice.
There were arguments involved.
Yes, of course.

(19:41):
Involved in this plan.
Between me and my husband.
Yes, for sure.
But I'll say, my mom is amazingabout the holidays.
She'll say to me and my sisterslike, figure out where you're
gonna go.
Yeah.
And dad and I will either comewith one of you, if it's just
gonna be her, the two of themleft, she'll come with one of us
like to, in-laws.
They're very easygoing about it.
And she said that her mother, somy grandmother one year lied to

(20:06):
her and said, oh yeah, I'm goingto my sister's for Thanksgiving.
Sure.
Go with your husband's family.
And they stayed home that yearon Thanksgiving because she
didn't wanna give, didn't wannapressure.
She didn't wanna put pressure.
Aw.
And I think as a parent, likeyour job is to not put extra
pressure right.
On your children.
I agree.
So if you are said child mom inyour forties, and your parent is

(20:26):
putting pressure on you.
I think that's.
Yeah, probably normal.
Yeah.
That's what happens.
Yeah.
But I also think that's wherepart of the pressure comes from
around the holidays for sure.
And it's a hard, I think it's aprobably a hard transition for
our parents too.
If you think about that, likethey go from being the hubs of
the family and everybody'scoming to them, but then when
everybody starts to have kidsand everybody is like their own

(20:48):
little hub of the family, it'shard.
Yeah.
Because like they wanna bringeverybody back in dead sharing
but it's sharing.
But I think sometimes you almosthave to release that.
There has to be some release ofthat.
I've been very lucky.
Both my parents and my in-lawshave been, everybody's been very
gracious about it and flexibleand trying to work.
But you also, it's not justabout the kind of like political

(21:10):
aspect of did you get to seethis person?
It's more that you just want tosee everybody.
You wanna be able to spend timetogether.
You don't wanna miss out onmemories and all of that.
But it is, it's, it gets reallytricky.
In-laws and with just with sizesof family.
So we feel you, if you guys arehaving those hard conversations
like we're probably having inour own homes.

(21:32):
Yeah.
It's hard.
So have you put into place anyholiday traditions yet?
Like a plate like.
You make a certain food, go to acertain place, see a show?
Definitely, as our own family,like the four of us, we wanna
start to put some traditions inplace.
Last year we went to a treelighting at That's cute.
T at TT Collective.

(21:52):
Oh my gosh.
Which was so fun.
So there's kicks off the season.
Yeah.
So I feel like there'sdefinitely things that we're
gonna be trying to do as ourfamily just to do.
Traditions.
'cause I think that there'snothing better as a kid than
having traditions.
To look forward to.
Yeah.
And it's crazy, even thoughLeo's three and a half this
Christmas, like he remembersthings from last Christmas.

(22:14):
So that also goes to show likewhy there would be like pressure
that you would put on yourself.
These kids are rememberingeverything, you want, there is
almost pressure to createtraditions and to make it
nostalgic.
And we had said this is theirchildhood, they, their memories.
I think about that.
And if that has been, I know Isaid it on a recent podcast, I

(22:35):
know about Halloween.
That pressure of this is theirchildhood.
I is just like sitting with me alot lately.
It could be that we're inholiday season.
Season, yeah.
These are their memories thatthey're gonna take.
With them to their families oneday and say, I want to have
something like this, or I don'twanna have something like this.

(22:55):
And just that awareness and thatpressure is crazy.
It really is.
So I'm trying to think about itin a positive way, but it's a
lot.
It's a lot.
Yeah.
Traditions leave a lastingmemory on you.
It's a little bit more than achildhood core memory.
Because if it's something thatyou do every single year, you
remember it even more.
You do.

(23:15):
It's so true.
So we travel aroundThanksgiving.
Yep.
That, so like our familytravels, you guys have your trip
around Thanksgiving and that'slike our kickoff to the holiday
season is we do that and then wetake the kids to see the
Christmas show in New York Cityevery year.
That's so fun.
And we don't usually miss it,and the kids will look forward
to going.

(23:36):
It's, that's like our, likeholiday tradition.
But this year we're going withmy parents and Nick's family,
like we're all going together.
That's so fun.
Fun.
Which I think is gonna be reallyfun.
Like my sisters are go the kidsare going, like at my aunt and
uncle are going like we'remaking it a big group.
We're making it a big group.
That's so fun.
Because when I was little, Iremember like loving doing

(23:56):
things with my grandparents.
Mm-hmm.
I loved when my grandparentswere there.
So we're trying to do morethings and include.
Parents.
Whereas like I think when mykids were younger, I was very
territorial of the memories.
'cause I was like, no, I wantthem, like I wanna savor them
just for myself.
But as my kids are gettingolder, I feel more comfortable
sharing them.
Yeah, that makes sense.
Does that make sense?

(24:16):
It does.
No, that makes a lot of sense.
I don't know.
So those are like our, like theBon Temple's, like two things
that we do.
I love that.
I what are some other pressuresthough that you tend to feel
with the holidays?
Duh.
All the money you have to spendon gifts for everybody Gift.
Ugh.
Yes.
It's so stressful.
It is so crazy.
It's so stressful.
And even when I think I have itdown to a science.

(24:37):
Like when I buy in bulk forteachers and this and that, it
just, it's like there's so manypeople to buy for I know.
And you don't wanna slideanybody.
I know.
And yeah.
You want it to be fair.
Okay.
So this is my other thing.
My kids have everything.
Everything.
Yep.
If they are shoes don't fitthem, I buy this size bigger.
If they need something, I getit.

(24:58):
And they almost get it like soinstantaneously that nobody
waits for anything anymore.
No.
When I was a kid, I rememberclearly having to wait for
Christmas or my birthday forsomething.
I unfortunately don't.
Run that ship in my house.
I wish I did.
But if they need something, weget it.
I know.
So then at Christmas I'm lookingfor things to buy them.
And I think it's absolutelyridiculous.

(25:20):
I know, the stuff just is sooverwhelming.
But, so I wanted to pick yourbrain on maybe some, because we
feel that too.
And I also feel like when youhave a big family and when
again, we use that term likewhen you're lucky enough to have
a lot of love and everybodywants to be generous and give
gifts to your kids, are thereways to streamline that?

(25:42):
So maybe it takes the pressureoff.
Yeah.
So for instance, this Christmasshow was my parents like gift to
us and like my kids, becausesame thing, they have seven
grandkids to buy for that getsexpensive.
Mm-hmm.
And she's what do you, what doyour kids you need?
Need?
What do you need?
Like one year I was like, canyou send them to camp?
Can that be their gift?
But so for me.

(26:04):
We like to do an experience.
But in order to like open stuffon Christmas Day, I don't really
have a good takeaway for you.
I know.
'cause it's hard.
I feel the same way.
I am, I try to be very practicalwith things.
Like, when my parents will askor someone, I'm like, they need
like PJs, they need shoes.
They need not exciting things.
That's what they actually need.

(26:25):
They're outgrowing stuff.
That's what we would actuallyuse.
But there's, you wanna be likeopening the fun, exciting things
for Christmas and it's, it doesget like very overwhelming with
even just the mental pressure tobe like, what do the kids need?
What do they actually need?
Mila and Eva want skincare.
That's what they told me theywant.

(26:45):
It's not what they need becausethey have perfect skin.
But they said they wantskincare.
Unreal.
So I don't really know.
And what like grandparents wannabuy your kids is not exactly
what you wanna always buy yourkids, right?
And usually they're like, oh,what do you want?
What do you want me to get them?
Like just buy them whatever youwant.
Buy them what you want to seethem open.

(27:06):
I know.
Know if it's gonna excite you.
And I'll worry about it later.
I know, I used to get soannoyed, I'm like, oh, this is
creating more work for me.
'cause where am I gonna put thisknow?
And I'm like, oh my God.
I know it's the micromanaging,which I tend to do.
And it I think that's actuallylike a really good approach is
it's like you buy what you thinkwill make you happy to see them
open, yeah.
And I think that sometimes we dogo, it's like we're too much.

(27:27):
It's like just, okay.
If that's what's gonna make thegrandparent happy, if they're
loving and they wanna buy agift, then just buy whatever you
wanna buy.
And we'll get them what theyneed anyway.
And it's, I think sometimes youhave to just let those things
go.
You do.
And I have, I had to learn thehard way.
Because I'm like, what?
I'm making more work for myself.
Yeah.
Even like going back and forthwith it.

(27:47):
But no, the gift giving for myown children I struggle with
because I feel like I gift give.
Every single day.
Mm-hmm.
And I try to get gifts thataren't like too extravagant.
Because I don't want them totell their friends, oh, I got
this.
And then their friends be like,oh, you got this.
And, but I also try not to like.
Downplay it too much.

(28:08):
'cause they're still little andthere's, it's still exciting.
It's hard.
So Leo was two and a half lastChristmas, and so he, it was the
first we like saw Santa, we gavehim a list.
I asked him, he was able to tellme like what he wanted to ask
Santa for.
And so I, it was the first yearwhere I was like, oh, I have to
like actually deliver on thisbecause he has a mind that

(28:31):
remembers every little detail.
And I was one of those moms witha two and a half year old
running from target to Targetlooking for what was in stock.
And I was like, this is crazy.
I can't believe that we'realready here.
And so I don't even know whatwe're asking for Santa this
year, but it's I don't know,even just that pressure alone,

(28:52):
you're like, wow.
I just can't believe how I guesshow it just snowballs and how
crazy it can get.
I think as far as like extendedfamily too, like that even
starts to stress me out withjust like how many people you
need to buy for.
It's like enough stress, likeworrying about your kids and
making sure that you thinkthey're gonna be happy with what

(29:12):
they have.
But there's just so many, evenlike extended kids, extended
adults, that is where I start tobe like.
Gift.
I will preface and say giftgiving is not my love language.
It's not my love language.
It's a lot of people's lovelanguage.
It's a lot of people's lovelanguage.
And it's not how I like, I don'tlike to, not that I don't like

(29:33):
to receive gifts, who doesn'tlike gifts, but it's, to me, I
just don't put a lot of weighton them.
Yeah.
Yours is more acts like acts.
Mine is definitely like wordsand quality time is probably
what I would think is, are mine.
But so I just don't tend to puta lot of weight on gifts in
general.
And, but to your point, a lot ofpeople do.

(29:55):
And so I think that could getstressful too.
And just the, sometimes theamount of people you think that
you need to buy for.
I remember one time before weall had kids with my.
Husband's side of the family.
I was like, we're all justadults giving each other gifts.
And so we decided to do like asecret Santa where it was like,
that's genius.
Pick one person and that's whoyou buy a gift for.

(30:19):
And at this point, I'm hoping,and I'm putting it out there, so
any of my family that'slistening, maybe we just do that
with the kids, where it's thekids go in a secret santa and
there's, you buy one gift forwhoever your secret Santa is.
And the adults like, stay out ofit.
I don't need a gift.
Like I, I just, I feel like thepressure and the amount that you
have to spend on people, it's Idon't need to open anything.

(30:41):
I feel like it's about the kidsnow I'm all set.
Don't worry about me.
I'm not gonna feel slighted.
Like it's just, it gets to be somuch.
I know.
So my mom isn't really like agift giver.
She doesn't love to do that.
So usually for Christmas shegifts us a night away.
Go away.
I'll watch your kids love thatlove and here's a gift card.
Love that to like a restaurant.

(31:02):
I love that from parents.
So if you are a grandparent,give your children the gift of
time.
A babysitter away.
Yeah.
Babysitter.
The kids.
That is like such a good, I knowa good gift to give your kids,
but I agree.
Then we don't have like Nick'ssister's single, so I buy for
her, and then my sisters, Iusually still buy them like a

(31:22):
little something.
Yeah.
But we buy for the kids.
I think that's what you have todo at a point where you're just
like, this becomes about thekids, but then in order for it
to not be madness where you'rehaving to buy for nine kids at
this stage, and on one side ofthe family, I think the secret
Santa to simplify and get onething, and then also just, then
it's like you don't, it's lessto wrap, it's less to do.

(31:42):
It's less for all of it.
Oh my God.
The wrapping.
It's crazy.
One year I got the monogramwrapping paper that had all
their names on it, and it alllooked so good until one pile
was bigger than the other.
And it doesn't ever look fairbecause the boys want like an
Xbox, or right.
Joseph wanted a electric E-bike.

(32:03):
Yep.
And I'm thinking to myself he'sgonna get one thing, one gift
with e-bike, one gift, and thegirls are opening like 50 little
things.
So I'm always trying to like,make the piles look No, the
equal, the politics, thefairness.
Ugh.
It's fairness.
Crazy.
I know.
And even like with the wrappingpaper, like I didn't, somebody
brought this to my attentionlast year and I was like, what?

(32:24):
They were like, wait, are yougonna get like different
wrapping paper from Santa?
And I was like, oh my God.
Like I didn't even think aboutthat.
And then some people were sayingthat they don't even Santa
doesn't wrap gifts, so I thinkit's just they always, Santa,
always wrapped gifts in myhouse.
But yeah, there's just so manylittle things to think of, which
is just so crazy.

(32:44):
But what about the pressure?
This sounds like this would becoming from my mouth because I
feel like I've used this inevery basically category we've
talked about on this podcast,but the pressure for everything
to be perfect.
Do you feel like stress withthat or are you a little bit
more carefree?
I like everything to lookperfect.
Yeah.
I like to have themed Christmastrees.

(33:05):
I'm not like a perfectionist,but I like the trees are coming
out next week.
Yeah.
And I need my elves herehelping.
Mm-hmm.
Like my mom and dad come overand it's like a whole thing.
And I'm a psycho because I dotrees for different rooms and I
plan them out throughout theyear.
And it's not for anybody else'senjoyment except my own.
But you, that's yeah.
I don't let the children puttheir.

(33:28):
Ornaments on my trees, theycould put them on their little
trees in their room becausetheir ornaments from school are
hideous and they don't go withmy decor.
Oh, so you are a littleaesthetic.
You got a little aesthetic inthere.
So I do have a little aestheticin me, but yeah.
A little aesthetic.
Psycho.
I don't have pressure.
Yeah.
Because I want others to see it.
It's for me, yeah.
I want the, I enjoy it.

(33:49):
Yes.
It's all for me.
Yes.
I agree with that.
But I do it every year.
So I can't not do it this year.
I've done it every year.
If I said to Nick, I'm onlyputting up one tree this year,
he'd be like, what is wrong withyou?
I will say for, so for me, I amlike, I can get myself pretty
wound up about like thingslooking a certain way and I want

(34:09):
things to be this way.
And last year.
We all know that I had a reallytough year.
And I said, this is not the yearfor the big Christmas tree.
We did one Christmas tree.
We did it in the foyer, which Idon't even think I, I don't even
know if I shared that.
I just was like, I think Ishared pictures from previous
years.
I was like, I just don't have itin me this year.

(34:31):
And I made myself very okay withthat.
I repeated that to myself.
I said, I'm not gonna do it.
It's too much we're gonna do.
Like the one we put it in thefoyer.
'cause I didn't want the kidsall up in it.
They were like, Layla was justcrawling around.
It was just too much.
It was not the year for it.
I was very surprised but alsoproud that I made that decision.
This is not the year to make mylife more challenging.

(34:53):
And I could sit there and say,this is what we normally do and
this is how I like it to look.
And I just said no.
And it honestly relieved a lot.
Just just allowing myself toeven say, no, I don't feel like
doing this.
We're not decorating a ton thisyear.
It's okay.
And this year we're feeling it,so we like, it's just, I feel
like it's a tree.

(35:14):
Yeah.
We got a new tree.
Is it up yet?
We did put it up and we haven'tdecorated it yet, but I just
feel like just allowing yourselfto.
Be okay if it's not the year, ifyou're not feeling it that year.
But I feel the pressure to havethis like perfect hallmark
decorated Christmas is real.

(35:36):
Yeah.
I feel that pressure, I feellike, again, we always come back
to the social media of it all.
It's crazy.
Who doesn't want a very likenostalgic decorated house?
But see, I love a decoratedhouse.
I love it.
And when it all comes down afterChristmas, I want it, my house
looks like it got robbed.
I know, because it's like bare.

(35:57):
I know, but it's so much.
It is, it's so much.
It is a lot of work.
I even did it when I waspregnant with the twins and I
remember taking the tree down onNew Year's Day.
I had like my parents over hereand I was like, get this tree
down.
I'm not delivering these twinswith a Christmas tree up.
I know.
I know.
That's the January birthday.
What do you think kids really doremember about the holidays

(36:19):
though?
Do you think it's like theperfect decorated house or do
you think it's the other things?
No, it's definitely not theperfect decorated house because
they,'cause you're saying that'sfor you?
That's for me.
And my kids are very clear.
That's for mom.
They remember going to theirgrandparents' house.
They remember seeing theircousins.
They remember all I make aseafood tower.
Yeah.
They remember that.
They remember when friends comeby.

(36:41):
Cause we have certain friendsthat come with their kids.
And those kids are like theircousins.
Like they remember the timespent, they remember the food.
I think they might remember somegifts.
Of course.
Yeah.
But they remember the, like thememories time.
The memories.
They remember the memories.
They don't remember right.
The tree and the decoration.
So if you personally don't enjoydoing them.

(37:03):
Then I think you should take apage from Christina's book and
not do that.
'Cause if I see, I enjoy it.
I enjoy it.
I'm like a weird weirdo and Ilove doing it.
Yeah.
And I don't mind the work.
I think, and I also think thatcould ebb and flow.
Yeah.
I usually love doing it and Ilove being around it, but there
was just a year where I waslike, this is not it this year.
Yeah.
So I'm glad you gave yourself apass.
I think sometimes around theholidays, like the kids.

(37:28):
Even like adults who putemphasis on gifts can get a case
of the gimmies I want more.
And I think because we live in atime where you have access to
everything mm-hmm.
Like so quickly.
We've done some things that makeme feel better about the gift
giving, and I'm trying to relaythese messages to my kids and

(37:48):
have these be part of the thingsthat they remember.
So like a few years ago, one ofmy girlfriends started a chapter
in Connecticut, the ShoeboxProject.
Love that.
So in early December, she wouldtake donations throughout the
holiday season.
In early December, a group offriends and I would get together
and we would do the assembly ofall of these boxes with all the
generous donations that wereceived.

(38:08):
So I started to do somethingsimilar with my kids and that
started to become our tradition.
Tradition, more tradition.
And more recently at school, theclasses adopt a family, adopt a
child.
And my kids have to beresponsible for buying gifts for
kids their own age.
And I just feel like if you areworried about the pressure of

(38:29):
the gift giving for your ownkids and them being
unappreciative, I think thatmaybe starting something like
that with them is a great placeto start.
When Joseph was little, we took'em to the children's hospital,
he brought to toys to theChildren's hospital.
And did a big donation.
We let'em bring them in.
And I thought that was like agood place to start with that,

(38:49):
just to teach like another levelof appreciation.
I love that.
Yeah.
I think that's really important.
So you asked me earlier, what'sone thing that I don't like
about the holidays.
Yeah.
Tell me.
And it is taking a family photo.
Oh my God.
And having to pose and make uslook happy.
It is so hard.

(39:10):
We are not happy.
And then I have to send out.
It's ironic.
Yep.
Like here we all are.
Yep.
Smiling and our matching outfitsthat everybody hates.
Yep.
And I make you do this everyyear.
And our photographer Michelle,like every time she gets my card
in the mail, like she knows whatshit was going on in the back.

(39:30):
I was swearing and sweating.
I had to bribe them.
Yep.
So this year I didn't take aphoto.
Guess what?
We didn't either.
I did one on my iPhone at thebeach this summer.
I Oh my goodness.
And I'm gonna send that out.
I, we didn't either, and I was,it was something that I really
wanted to do.
We haven't taken any sort ofprofessional family photos.

(39:51):
Like, I haven't gotten any sostressful.
I haven't done like newborn orfamily, anything like that.
I've wanted to, it is somethingthat I wanna do.
I wanna be able to have nicepictures of the kids and us.
But every time I went to bookthe photographer, the kids were
sick and I was like, this isn'tgonna work.
He's sick now, so she's gonna besick in a couple days.
And it just didn't work.
And I said, we're not gonna havea picture this year, so I don't

(40:13):
even know if we're gonna sendout a card.
Somebody I just saw was like, Ilove your card every year.
And I was like, I honestly don'tknow if we're sending one this
year.
It was like a source of stressand I was like, you know what?
We're not gonna do it.
If it doesn't work.
It doesn't work.
Maybe the picture that you hadtaken of the kids, the school
pictures?
Yes.
The black.
Yes.
Oh, we could do that one.
Maybe do that one.
Maybe we could just do that.
They're so cute.
I know.

(40:33):
And these shows their littlefaces.
And we don't have to stress outabout the family photo.
The family photo.
The family photo.
I know.
All of our Pippa's listening areprobably what we're talking
about too.
Like the coordinated outfits andthe stress that you have to buy
something new and all of it.
It's like the family photo isprobably like the kickoff to
everybody's mentee bees duringthe holiday season.

(40:54):
'cause I know everybody justgoes crazy and you send out the
picture and everybody wentthrough hell to get that
picture.
And it's so hard.
So I agree with that.
That's like another one whereyou're like, it's just, it
doesn't work.
And trust.
I enjoy getting them.
Yeah.
I love seeing my friends.
Yeah.
And their kids grow every year.
I save the cards..
I think they're so beautiful.
I love them and I love to seelike what everybody decided to

(41:15):
do.
Yeah.
With the font.
Yeah.
And I, I do in that sense payattention to detail.
Yeah.
I love a nice card stock, but Ididn't take professional
pictures this year.
I that.
'cause last year I was soannoyed with my family.
And you know what, we've gottenseveral pictures where you can
just tell it was like an iPhone.
Like it might even, the parentsmight not be in it.
It's just like a cute quickpicture of the kids.

(41:37):
And those are just as meaningfulas the crazy outlandish matching
coordinated outfits.
And you're on a beach or you'resomewhere glamorous, they don't
mean any less, right?
Like it's just nice to mine frommine is from the iPhone.
I love it.
And actually, I think you goiPhone can take it.
Terrific.
But I like that.
Even the school picture.
Terrific.
The school picture.
I think that maybe we'll dothat.
That was a really good idea.
Not everybody that you love isgonna see your pictures on

(42:00):
social media.
I like to send them to my greataunt.
Right, of course.
And uncles and cousins.
And it's a family.
Family that doesn't see ourlives on social media.
They like to get a picture of usin the mail.
Put it on the refrigerator.
I love it.
Okay.
I think that you just gave meits bow for what we're gonna do
this year because that thing, Iwas stressing about it and then
I was like, you know what?
We're not worrying about it.
It is what it is.

(42:20):
And I wasn't gonna sendanything.
And also, if you don't wannasend a holiday card also fine,
that's also fine.
Yes.
I received holiday emails lastyear.
Yep.
Which I thought were cute.
You don't have to sendsomething.
I know.
It's okay, tip.
It's okay.
Good tip.
'cause they're also expensive.
They are.
It's crazy.
That's what I'm saying, thematching outfits, the
photographer the card itself,the mailing, it's, it is such an

(42:44):
investment and it's crazy.
It is crazy.
So not necessary.
Are you doing anything else tolift the pressure or is that.
I'm definitely using papergoods.
Okay.
Oh, good tip.
We do paper goods.
I am such a fan of that.
I will do a big Costco run and Iwill probably start stocking up
on things like soon-ish.
That are non-perishable.

(43:04):
I'll buy like the alcohol, I'llbuy the paper stock, I'll buy
whatever, comes up between likenow and, Christmas that's on
sale that I can just stock up,down in the basement, like two
of the paper towels.
Just things like that.
I'll just be a little bit kinderto myself.
Yeah.
Like around hosting time, butthen.
I don't really, I don't reallycut back with the food.

(43:25):
No.
I think, the food is great.
That's like what's important tome, and I was gonna say, I feel
like food for me is that isreally like the ba that's like
the shining star of the moment.
Like I feel like what theholidays to me is all about,
like eating good food and justbeing with your family.
I love the tip about the papergoods.
Yeah.
It is not a sustainable tip, butI feel like that's what I feel

(43:45):
like it is something that justtakes the load off of use.
So much so there, there's like apack on Amazon that we have
gotten when we've hosted andthey literally look like plates,
like if you're so concerned, youcan literally make a tablescape
with them.
They look like plates and thenthe, they're, if you really
wanna get fancy, they havematching like gold disposable

(44:05):
silverware and like disposablecups that are rimmed with gold
and they look beautiful.
So you don't have to kill atablescape to, in order to have
your life be so much easier,we've had people be like, wait,
do we throw these away?
And I'm like, they go in thetrash.
Yes.
But, so if you feel like youneed something a little bit in
the middle, I can link the setthat we've used because they
come in like a pack of 50 and wesometimes we've had them and

(44:27):
we've had them for leftovers.
Oh yeah.
And they might even come in likea pack of a hundred.
Amazing.
And so worth.
It's such a good tip.
Yeah.
Such an amazing tip.
If I host Christmas'causesometimes some years I do.
I do a sit down dinner and I useChina and I use a place mat and
I use a napkin that goes to thedry cleaner the next day.
And I use glass that's fancy.
Like it's fancy.

(44:48):
Yeah.
But I don't love that.
No.
So that's why I prefer, yeah.
A non sit down dinner with papergoods.
Yep.
I love that.
In the trash.
Less dishes like make your lifeeasy.
Also, when I'm hosting, I putthe platters out ahead of time.
And I write on a sticky notewhat's going on the platter.

(45:09):
Oh, I like that.
So people, if they're in thekitchen and they're helping,
they know where to put things,things go.
If something's coming out of theoven oh, this goes here.
Or it's, oh, this goes there.
Everything is like preset.
And I, us, I don't cook everysingle thing I order in some
side dishes and then I cook nomix and I cook some side things.
So those are my.
Hosting tips.
I love that.

(45:29):
Okay.
Those are all really good tips.
Pippa's, if you guys have anyhosting tips that you can send
our way, I feel like that isjust like women helping women
when you have,'cause I feel likeit takes, it's like a science,
right?
When you get it down and you'relike, this works, right?
And all of the things.
And I just love learning hacksfor that type of stuff.
'cause we're all about the hackshere.

(45:50):
Yeah.
And I feel like if you have anygood hosting holiday
entertaining or just likeholiday hacks to make your life
easier during this time, pleaseshare them with us, share them
all, and we'll share them withyou guys.
We can do that on Instagram too,because I feel.
Everybody has a differentexperience and we all have the
knowledge.
We all know what makes life alittle bit easier, so share the

(46:12):
wealth.
I know.
On Christmas Eve last year, Nickwent out and got bagels for the
next morning.
He got like the Christmas colorbagels.
Ooh.
Cute.
And then he got a giganticCinnabon from the bakery.
And that was breakfast the nextmorning easy.
And it was perfect because itwas like a Christmas themed
breakfast.
I wasn't cooking, I wasenjoying.
I just feel like if you couldmake your life extra easy.

(46:34):
Yes.
Ooh, that reminds me.
I have a really good one.
So my mom, I've shared thisrecipe on my blog before, so
I'll see if I could find it andshare it with you guys.
We called it like dressed upFrench toast for the Holidays.
Ooh.
And it's something that you canmake the night before and have
sit in your fridge.
And so this is another tip.
Oh, so is it like egg, you getlike bread, you can get like any

(46:55):
sort of like hearty bread.
So like you can get likewhatever you're serving for
Christmas Eve even.
Yes.
Like that Texas toast, likeanything that's like big, thick,
dense bread.
And you chop it all up, you putit in a pan, you do eggs, milk,
anything like, anything flavor,like cinnamon, vanilla,
cinnamon.
Yep.
Anything that you wanna do, youpour that over the top.
You put a little bit of shreddedcheese over the top pop it in

(47:17):
your fridge, let it sitovernight.
Like you make sure the bread iscoated and then in the morning
you just preheat your oven andpop it in and it's like the most
delicious French toast ever.
Everything's already cut.
So it comes out as one and youcan just cut it up.
But it tastes like French toastand French toast is oh, I love
that.
A labor of love.
Sometimes you have to sit there,you have to do it in batches.

(47:38):
It's so easy and it feeds agroup.
We've done that several timesand that is gonna be like
something.
So maybe we'll do that forChristmas because it's ready.
You can have it done the nightbefore.
And then in the morning wheneveryone's opening the gifts,
you like pop it in.
And then everybody can eat.
I love that.
Yeah.
What about a hostess gift?
If you go to somebody's house?
Do you bring a gift?
We, if you do, what do you like?

(47:59):
Do you have any goodsuggestions?
We always I feel obviouslyeverybody brings wine, but I
feel like I have loved whenpeople have brought like olive
oil to our house, like a niceolive oil.
Anything for the kitchen that'sthat's could be usable.
Like a little bit of a gadget orsomething along those lines.
I like stuff like that.
Mm-hmm.
I find that very useful.
Okay.
But I love an olive oil.
An olive oil.
If you're gonna get me like anice olive oil, I think that is

(48:21):
just so special.
Okay.
That's a good idea.
And it lasts, especially if youhave a nice one.
I'd much rather have that than abottle of wine.
That's a terrific idea.
Last longer.
So now while you're shopping ifyou have to buy a couple extra,
those will last too.
You can they last forever?
Pop those in your cabinet andthen pull'em out to bring, yep.
All right.
So that's a great idea.
Yep.
Love that.
I love that.
Okay.
What about, should we go intoour last segment?

(48:44):
Yes, let's do it.
Let's do it.
All right.
So we're gonna share our pinkspotlight.
Our person, place thing, tip,mantra, something.
Making life a little bettertoday.
Do you have one for us today?
I do.
So is it related to this or isit not?
No, it should be though.
Sometimes we have themes andwe're like, let's just stay on
theme.
But then sometimes I have randomsuggestions.

(49:05):
Actually, you know what, I dothink it is related to today
because in the holiday seasonyou're going to a lot of
parties, events, whatever.
Okay?
Yep.
If you're wearing a skirt or adress, we live in Connecticut,
your legs will be pale.
So my pink spotlight is a spraytan.
Yeah.
And it's the girl that does myspray.

(49:26):
Tans The one that comes to yourhouse?
The one that comes to my house.
Okay.
So she'll travel all overConnecticut.
Okay.
She, her name is Jenna.
She has a studio her studio isin West Hartford.
Oh, okay.
But she'll travel.
So depending on where you are,it'll be slightly more
expensive.
So if you go to her studio inWest Hartford, I think her spray
tans are$65.
And then depending on how farshe travels from there, the

(49:48):
price goes up.
Yep.
But she comes here, she does aspray tan in less than three
minutes.
That's crazy.
And the solution that she usesdries odorless.
And it dries instantly sothere's no transfer to your
clothes.
Wow.
So when she came here the othernight before the gala, two of my
other friends came over.
So then you like split themobile price?
Yes.
So it's not as.

(50:09):
That is such a good idea.
Like it doesn't feel as bad, butI think she's great.
And I think around the holidays,if you're going to holiday
parties and you wanna treatyourself to something.
Mm-hmm.
I think a spray tan is a nicetreat.
Oh yeah.
Especially very needed aroundthis.
I feel like that she makes shegood.
She's actually, she's a makeupartist too, so her precision
when she applies the spray tanis great.

(50:31):
Like she can contour and she cando whatever, but I really like
it.
I think.
Good tip.
I think she's great.
And I'll link her in the shownotes.
Good tip.
So mine is similar because if,and I feel like it's good for
this time of year too, if youhave like holiday parties that
you're going to or anything,it's not usually the time of
year where you treat yourself tosomething because you're so

(50:51):
worried about everybody else.
So I have started trialing outthis bag rental company called
Vivre and I am obsessed.
So basically you pay a monthlyfee and it depends on what tier
you want.
I think they have threedifferent tiers.
I went with the base one'cause Iwanted to see what was included

(51:12):
in that.
You basically can rent bags fromthat.
It's like a rent the runway, butit's strictly for bags.
And I think they have someaccessories, but I rented a
Fendi baguette bag that I hadbeen wanting forever.
I wasn't sure on what size Iwanted and what color I wanted
because it comes in a bunch ofdifferent colors.
They have a bunch of differentsizes.

(51:33):
I wasn't sure how often I woulduse it.
So this is actually the secondbag that came.
The first bag that came wassomething else that I wanted to
try, and I was like not a fan.
This doesn't work.
So you sent it right back.
Yeah.
This is not very practical forme.
And so I ended up trading it in.
I got this bag and I am so happythat I'm giving it, I was
calling it like a test drivebecause I'm actually able to see

(51:55):
is this something I'm reachingfor?
Is this this correct size forme?
And so I'm trialing it out and Ilove that, that when this goes
back, we're hoping to like havea vacation in the new year as
well.
And I'm like, then I can rentsomething that like maybe that
could work for a vacation butthat I could have just for a
couple of weeks and send itback.
And it's just so much fun to beable to, to kind of trial things

(52:18):
out.
But if you have an event thatyou need something for and you
want something nice, plan aheadfor it.
Plan ahead.
You can plan ahead if you'regoing somewhere, if you're
traveling, especially like withseasons, because I could
actually keep this bag.
As long as I want.
It doesn't, it's not like I haveto send it back at the end of
the month.
So if you want it to havesomething for three months and
then send it back and getsomething else and do it like
quarterly, you can have that.

(52:39):
And I just feel like that it'ssuch a good hack and I am so
happy that I'm trialing this outbecause I love this bag.
I'm like, I don't wanna send itback.
You can also offer to buy thebag and they'll give it to you
at a discount oh yeah.
That's good to know.
That also might be somethingthat I'll see how I feeling.
Yeah.
Because if it's anauthenticated, like slightly
used Yep.
Great condition bag.
Yes.

(53:00):
Why not go for that?
Why not?
So like they will price thatout, and you'll, they'll give it
to you at a fair price.
But I love that so much.
And they did give me a discounttoo, so you could use Christina
Taishi 50 and you can get 50%off your first month.
Ooh.
Which is really exciting.
So try that out.
And I feel like now that we'rein like the holiday season, you
can definitely.

(53:20):
Get yourself something nice andthat's great if you have any
holiday parties.
So how long is this rental for?
So this rental is until I wannasend it back.
Oh.
But I, so I think I, but I dothink that I'm probably gonna
send it back.
Sometime in December, becausethen I'm gonna want something,
we're trying to plan a trip inJanuary and so I'm gonna want
something that's not like a fallholiday bag.
I'll probably want somethingthat I could take on a trip.

(53:42):
Okay.
And so they'll just keepcharging you a monthly fee.
Yeah.
Until, and then, but you cankeep the bag or send it back or
send it and get another one.
Yep, exactly.
And there's different, like Isaid, there's different tiers,
but I have been very happy withthe le the lowest tier.
There's so many items.
It's not like a scam where youfeel like, oh, you have to buy
like the most expensive one.
There's so many good bags.

(54:03):
This was from the mostexpensive, or this was from the
least expensive.
So it's beautiful.
It is.
It's a nice, like Fendibaguette, it's like a medium
size.
It has two different straps.
It's just like very functionalfor me.
And I've been using it as aneveryday bag.
So it's been great.
I love it.
I love it.
It's beautiful.
Thank you.
Good tip.
Yeah.
And 50% off.
I know it for one month.
Why not try?

(54:23):
I know.
Try it out.
So let me know how you guys likeit and you should try it too.
I know.
I'm trying to think what I haveon my eye, what my eye on
lately.
I feel like I know it's likenice to take a look and kind of
peek around.
But I know.
All right, so next week we willbe back.
Yes.
Since we got this conversationout of the way, I think it's a
good reminder for us to try toenjoy parts of our holiday

(54:47):
season.
It's the season and we'll getthrough it to together.
Yes.
Yes.
All right.
Have a good week.
I know.
Have a good week, girls.
Bye.
Bye.