Cooter Fight

Beck and Dash debate the best holiday candy, swap small-town crime stories (including how many murderers they've personally known), and get into the Lemkin Institute's transgender genocide alert and why chromosomal testing in sports is going to backfire spectacularly.

Also: spring cleaning as emotional warfare, the Sheets parking lot as Appalachian social institution, Cooter's legendary Facebook beef that almost became a fistfight, early internet nostalgia, and classroom chaos from two people who probably shouldn't be trusted with students.

Yehaw. Y'all means all.

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Episode Transcript

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Welcome to Queernecks, the podcast (00:06):
undefined
that puts the yehaw in y'all means all.
I'm your host, Beck,

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: and I'm your host. (00:11):
undefined
Dash.
Welcome to today's episode.
I went to the store andbought some candy earlier.
Which holiday or season doyou think has the best candy?

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Easter or (00:21):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: I think it's easier. (00:22):
undefined

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: but I think it's Easter. (00:24):
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'cause there's a lot, there'sa lot more variety I think.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (00:28):
Yeah.
And I don't know that, likecompanies like really go outta
their way to make this A SMR now.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (00:37):
Yeah.
Sorry.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: I love those. (00:38):
undefined

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (00:39):
I love
miniature versions of food.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (00:41):
and I just love the, the egg stuff.
Like that's some of my, my favorite.
I love a Cadbury egg.
That's what I just got earlier.
And the only time you see'em is at, is around Easter.
In stores anyway.
May, I'm sure they sell 'em year round.
You could probably buy 'emoff a website somewhere.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Oh, I'm sure. (00:58):
undefined
I'm sure Amazon has them.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (01:01):
But I like the mini Cadbury eggs too.
Like the, the ones that are kind oflike that, but it's the Cadbury brand.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: These are Whoppers. (01:07):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (01:09):
okay, so they're malted milk in the center?

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Mm-hmm. (01:11):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (01:12):
Yeah.
Nice.
Like Reese's ones, but I, let's, it's notjust candy that you can get you around
that is in a diff in this type of an egg.
Suddenly, like there's differentflavors too, like all of the different
miniature candy coated chocolatesout there with like almond denim.
I think.
M and MSS does some,
there really is a, there's alobby for everything, but like the

(01:35):
holidays, it's funny that there's.
The candy company or whatever, the candyblock, they're like, okay, here's our,
here's our capitalist candy for X holiday.
What would you call the candy lobby?

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: The industrial sugar complex, (01:50):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (01:54):
Big candy.
Big candy does not sound

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (01:59):
it sounds like a particular kind of stripper.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: Yeah, exactly. (02:01):
undefined
A, a, a woman of specifictalents or a really good boxer.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: It could be John Candy. (02:09):
undefined
He was a big candy

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (02:11):
Yeah.
Happy Friday to you and happyMonday to the listeners.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: the 13th. (02:16):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: Oh my gosh, it is (02:17):
undefined

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (02:19):
Yes.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (02:20):
the, this like the second one we've had this year.
Yeah.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: was a perfect month. (02:23):
undefined
It started on Sunday thefirst, and ended on the 28th.
So, uh, March is amirror of, uh, February.
So it happens the same way.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: Is it always like that? (02:35):
undefined
Those two months?

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (02:37):
no.
It

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (02:38):
Oh, okay.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: line up that way. (02:38):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (02:40):
Do I, I remember like these being, those
kinds of things being a big deal whenwe were kids, like those kinds of
coincidences, people would get reallyinto those and they all seem like
really significant to them, especially.
Do you know anybody whobelieves in like, number theory?
Is that what it's called?

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (02:54):
my mom liked to do that stuff for lottery
numbers, but, not, not too much.
No.
That's why I said the other day Ineeded a white girl, some white girl,
to tell me what stars were making me sad

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (03:04):
Uh,
it is not number theory.
I don't know what it's called.
I'm not gonna come up with it.
Maybe, maybe that
mystical study of the relationshipbetween numbers and events using
birth dates and names to determinepersonality traits, vibrational energy.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Speaking of energy, I like all (03:21):
undefined
the patterns you're wearing.
That brings this specifickind of energy Here.
You got some plaid, you gotsome stripes and some camo.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (03:32):
I like, I got cold and got like sweats
and then a hoodie and then I wasstill cold 'cause I'm sitting in
front of one of the broken windows.
There's only so many outlets upstairs.
And so I just put on my bathrobe and thenI, my head was cold and I needed a hat.
And this is the only hat I had up here.

(03:53):
This is actually one of thehats David wore in Iraq.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (03:57):
wow.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: So I don't really wear it much. (03:58):
undefined
'cause you see, it's thatsand camo the army used.
It's like that digital, Idon't know, it is not very
comfortable, but my head is warmer.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: There's that. (04:07):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (04:08):
You wouldn't think that they would need like, um, you
know, thermal clothes for the desert.
But apparently it gets supercold at night over there.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Yeah, I think I knew that. (04:16):
undefined
Not that I've ever been there or anything.
We established my out of countryexperience the other day, going to
Canada for fries and a Cherry Pepsi.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (04:26):
For French, I will go to Canada for some french fries.
It is a little tight though.
It's not a super comfortable hat.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (04:32):
Yeah.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (04:33):
Oh, well,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: I keep my hats right here beside (04:33):
undefined
the, where I sit to to do this.
I have a couple littlehooks, so I put 'em there.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (04:40):
I mean, it's, it's just really messy
in here, and so I think I'm gonna,I, that's why I'm up upstairs now.
I started putting together likemy office space and I'm here in
the, the trans flag room, which I.
I guess it's gonna be my office.
I don't know.
I doubt the person who paintedit these colors was thinking

(05:01):
trans flag, but that is Sure.
What they painted these walls as we'vegot, you know, that, that pastel pinky
purple on the top and then the, theexact color blue on the bottom and
then that a white, what's this called?
It's not waist coing.
It's like a chair rail.
It goes around the middle.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So it, it looks just like the trans flag.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: That's kind of (05:23):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: I mean, I might leave it. (05:23):
undefined
I know it's hideous too.
It is the only roomthat's painted like this.
The rest of 'em are kind of normal.
I'm thinking it must have been a kid, but.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: could have been twins, (05:33):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: Yeah, could have been a whole mess (05:35):
undefined
of people lived in this house.
It was before I learned that it waslike just a, a family, a big family.
I really thought that it was somelike crash pad roommate situation.
There was one in the basement, fouror five of 'em up here on the top
floor, a couple on the main floor.
It's not that big of a house.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: That's a lot. (05:55):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (05:56):
I wouldn't wanna live in the basement.
Good god.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Oh hell no. (05:58):
undefined
I don't like basements at all.
Even when they're,
finished.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (06:02):
kind of a hard sell even when they're nice.
But mine is not nice.
No wonder he was high all the time.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Shannon and Mike's first apartment, (06:07):
undefined
our, uh, laundry facilities werein the basement and we had to go
down these rickety ass stairs to godown like an unfinished basement.
It was very creepy down there.
I was so glad when wemoved outta that house.
There were some murders that happenedin Huntington, West Virginia.
It would've been 2004 or when it happened.

(06:27):
Some

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (06:28):
I thought you meant like recently.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: No, no. (06:29):
undefined
so some kids were, uh, doingafter prom at this guy's house.
And one of them did a drug dealgone bad and the drug dealer barged
in and shot everybody at the partythere were bodies strewn everywhere
of these high school students.
It was a kind of a big deal andthey didn't know who did it.
I don't know if it was recently inthe news again, I don't know if it

(06:51):
was an anniversary or if they foundwho did it or what but they didn't
know who did it for a long time.
And it happened three blocksfrom my house, same street.
I was home when it happened.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (07:02):
Wow.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (07:02):
Yeah.
' cause it was
late at night.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (07:04):
Yeah, I guess mom, I guess she was watching
the news and she called me and sheasked me if she'll do this sometimes,
like, do you know, do you recognizesuch and such name from Williamsburg?
No.
I, I probably couldn't pick peopleI had fucked out of a lineup.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (07:19):
Right.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (07:19):
that is so gone from my memory, like the experience
of being there is, but not the people.
Good lord.
There's a handful of them that I'llremember for the rest of my life.
And the rest of them were backdrop, right?
They were like the setting,they do not factor into.
To who I am today.
But it'll be like, well, yeah,he, he just murdered somebody or

(07:40):
it's always some like high drama.
I wonder listeners, if any ofy'all are from like a big town.
Does, does, is this athing to your parents?
If you're from like a big city,do your parents go call you and
go like such and such from yourhigh school murdered somebody?

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Or have you ever had a good (07:54):
undefined
friend commit a heinous crime?

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (07:57):
I definitely want to know about that.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: like there was a guy when I worked (08:04):
undefined
at the studio, I listeners, Iused to be a, a photographer.
I did high school seniors and weddings,kids, babies, all that kind of stuff.
And I worked there for a, a while.
And so he got hired in fora while as my assistant.
He would like clean the floorsand help me set stuff up.
and a few, like he was a nice kid.
I liked him a lot and I kindalost track of him, you know,

(08:27):
because you go your separate ways.
And it wasn't like we werebest friends or whatever.
But I really thought he was a goodkid and I was friends with him on
Facebook because he's cousins with aguy that I graduated high school with.
Anyway, long story short, turns out he.
Sexually assaulted his stepdaughter.
Said he fell in love with her,like disgusting stuff like that.

(08:48):
And he's in prison for likelife ' cause it was like 13 counts
of, of, of rape or whatever.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (08:54):
Wow.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (08:55):
And it blows my mind that, it just blows my mind.
I was so wrong about somebody's character.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (09:03):
Uh, I just fell down a rabbit hole of just Googling
people that I went to high school with.
It's like dead murderer sex crimes.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: How many people in your life have (09:11):
undefined
you known that have been murdered?

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (09:14):
Oh.
I would say it's probablynot more than 10.
It, it just, somewhere betweenfive and 10, but they weren't
like besties, you know, theyweren't people I knew very well.
It was just, you just kind of knowpeople that die sometimes and that
may not be as common experienceas it seems like it is to me.

(09:35):
What about you?

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: At the last time I tried to count, (09:36):
undefined
I think it was six, like my,

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (09:40):
Yeah.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: and when I was, when I was a kid, mom's (09:41):
undefined
best friend or one of her best friends,a lady named Annette and Mark's best
friend, my adopted father, uh, Danny,they were both murdered not together.
Uh, Annette was murdered by her stepsonand uh, Danny was murdered by his wife.
So right.
There's two people.
And
then there was a, a lady that was afriend of um, she's like an a, a chosen

(10:05):
aunt, if that, if that makes sense.
You know, she's, she's not actuallyfamily, but she might as well be family.
It was her best friend adopted a kidand she brought him over for pictures
at the studio and he's the only kidthat insisted on a picture with a
cigarette hanging out of his mouth.
the only one that ever did, I rememberedhim very well, and he turned around

(10:26):
and murdered her like a year later.
The

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (10:28):
well,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: that was taking care of him. (10:29):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (10:31):
I, I think I've known, I don't know
about more, but like the people Iknow who are, who were murderers.
I knew better than the peopleI had known who were murdered.
And, and you know, we're, I'm usingthat word kind of generally because
there's some manslaughter in there too.
Like some like, uh, vehicularhomicide that kind of thing.

(10:53):
Like it wouldn't, I don't, well, no.
I do know somebody who actually, justrecently, somebody in Richmond that I used
to work with was sentenced to murder one,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (11:04):
Wow.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (11:05):
and he used to date my ex-girlfriend.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Oh wow. (11:08):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: He murdered his wife. (11:09):
undefined

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: That's what you get. (11:10):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (11:12):
Yeah.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (11:12):
my uncle, he was my greatuncle, he was my
grandmother's brother was a real weirdo.
I, that's what I was alwaystold that he was a weirdo.
That's why we didn't go around him.
But I remember him distinctlyfrom when I was little.
He got beaten up and murdered onhis front porch by a group of boys.
Like, I think he got into an argumentwith him and they came up and killed him.
and then my cousin, uh,Barbie, she was murdered of.

(11:37):
She was strangled.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: I don't think I'm related to (11:38):
undefined
anybody that's been murdered.
I think I am related to somebodythat murdered somebody though.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (11:44):
Yeah.
I have some cousins I thinkcould absolutely do it.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (11:48):
There's a lot of people that, I mean, people die
from die accidentally from just gettingin fist fights, especially 'cause they
won't go to the, to the hospital oranything and they won't call the law.
one person I'm thinking of got in a realbad fist fight while they were drunk.
Went home and took some just pain pillsor whatever and went to sleep and died

(12:11):
of internal bleeding in the, in hissleep from just how bad that he got beat

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (12:16):
Wow.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (12:16):
and probably also from drinking and
that like thins your blood andmakes internal bleeding worse.
But yeah, I mean people, I don't know.
We, it's a, our bodies are like a mixtureof like absurdly tough and also just so
specifically weak in very bizarre ways.
You know?

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Yeah, like babies, you can do anything (12:35):
undefined
to 'em, except that one tiny littlespot on the top of their head.
If
you poke that, they'll die immediately.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: yeah, don't even touch it. (12:44):
undefined
I saw somebody talking aboutwhat it's like to look at it.
The spot.
Like you can actually see likesometimes their heartbeat in there
and like you can see the brain moving.
It's not the brain moving, but you know.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (12:59):
Ew.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (12:59):
Yeah.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: As Jimmy Fallon would say, Ew. (13:00):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (13:03):
Oh, guess who came to fucking Ohio
and northern Kentucky yesterday?
Was it yesterday?

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (13:09):
I saw, yeah, I think it was yesterday.
Ugh.
Glad I wasn't down there.
That he went to.
I just knew he went to

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (13:16):
yeah.
He, mm-hmm.
Yeah, it was both.
It's real, I don't knowexactly what he was doing.
Like this is such a specificlocation and he absolutely beeped.
Feet to get there.
Like it was like they justwent straight to Cincinnati
and, and did some shit there.
I don't know.
Clogged up all the roads.
I know that people weren't ableto pick their kids up and stuff.

(13:38):
And then went to Frankfurt or NorthernKentucky and was flogging for some dude.
I thought it would be Andy Barr,at least somebody I had heard of.
It's not, it's some like randomMAGA that they want to, to beat
Thomas Massey, like they're afraid.
Thomas Massey's gonna win inKentucky because Mitch McConnell's

(13:58):
ancient tortoise ass is out.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Thank God. (14:01):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (14:02):
Right.
Oh God.
Talk about overstaying your welcome.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (14:05):
Right.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (14:06):
has overstayed his welcome on planet Earth.
do we have to do?
I mean, I, it does, I I do feel a littlebit gross in, in this like situation.
We have to be in here.
We're like, God, I guess we have tohope these fuckers die because that's
the only way to get 'em outta office.
It's the only way to get these dinosaursoff our dicks about like what, what

(14:29):
our society should even look like.
Right.
How it should function.
What's the name of that?
That Genocide Institute.
Something started with an l Lem Lemkin.
I'm just making, oh my God.
It is Lemkin Lemkin Institutefor Genocide Prevention.
This is a um, international watchdog,they have given their third red flag

(14:51):
alert on transgender genocide in the us.
Because it's just on cruise control now.
Like they're, if you're, if you'refollowing any of the blogs, right,
if you're getting updates fromErin in the morning, or bizarrely,
pink News is really covering theanti-trans legislation in the us.
I, I guess because they're UKbased, they can have a really

(15:14):
fine lens on that kind of thing.
They went from, I think it was 2020Pink News was rightly criticized
for having no trans representation.
No, like, coverage of how, what,you know, trans, uh, people were
experiencing to now they have thiswhole wing that only covers that.

(15:34):
So if you're not subscribing to anyof those, you could easily miss one
of these damn bills because they'rejust like rapid fire these days.
But the Lakin Institute, the, redflag they just issued is, uh, to do
with the volume of bills that arenot only being introduced but passing

(16:00):
. I did see I guess they're gonnastart, I don't know for, for what,
but for a lot of like, pro sports,they're gonna start chromosomal
testing to prove you're a woman.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: That's ridiculous. (16:10):
undefined
There's gonna be a whole lot

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (16:12):
It is

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: confused about the results about that (16:13):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: because we've done it before. (16:15):
undefined
Do you know why we stopped?

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: there were so many people that out they (16:18):
undefined
were, they were the wrong chromosome.
Gender

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (16:23):
Yes,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (16:24):
yeah.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (16:24):
because cis people didn't like finding out
that they were fucking intersex.
They did not enjoy the experienceof marginalization, of being told
that they were one thing when theyknew themselves to be another thing.
And it's been long enough nowapparently, that they forgot about that.
So they're gonna start doing it again,and they will not like what they find.

(16:46):
I do.
Uh, actually, I think that the, a lot ofthe intersex disorders are pretty common.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Oh yeah. (16:50):
undefined
It's as common as red hair, as manynatural redheads you've met in your life.
You've met just as many intersex people.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (16:57):
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think it's cool.
You know,
the cats are going crazy.
Anytime Felix plays, he has to kiss a lot.
He's enjoying himself, but itreally sounds like he's not, he
You're sending mixed signals, buddy.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: That's how emo people are. (17:10):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (17:12):
Were you ever emo, were you a scene kid?

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: No, not, not whatsoever. (17:14):
undefined
always been just an androgynous nerd.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (17:19):
I think a lot of people would say that emo and
scene were androgynous, which I guessis true, but it was kind of a glam,
like a high glam sort of fem androgynyleaning on the side of femininity,
but maybe like a hardcore femme.
I certainly like I, for a whilethere I would dye my hair black and
straighten it and shit like that.

(17:40):
And it felt that was like, thatfelt pretty feminine for me.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Feminine was never a goal for me. (17:44):
undefined
I never, mean, there was like, forprom, of course I dressed up for stuff
like that, but like homecoming, I waswearing flannel, like I wasn't putting
a dress on for some bullshit like that.
Since high school, I've worn a dressexactly three times to two funerals,
and one or two weddings and one funeral.

(18:04):
That's it.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (18:05):
Shut up.
Maybe if I hold her, she'll be quiet.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: She's so pretty. (18:09):
undefined
I've got a chihuahua wedged betweenmy back and the back of the couch.
She likes to get in therejust as tight as she can get.
then Wendy's on her back laying withher feet up in the air next to me.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (18:20):
They are shedding the dog shed to your

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (18:23):
yeah.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: shed when it gets. (18:23):
undefined

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (18:24):
yeah.
Like house was nothing butblack fur when baby was here.
Just corner to corner,just black fur everywhere.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: Yeah, there are Ziggy sized cat (18:31):
undefined
fur dust bunnies on the stairs.
I don't know why they collect onthe stairs, and I find that like
a really tricky spot to clean.
Ziggy go away.
She's just screaming at me.
I can't figure out what she wants,and it's, I can tell it's something
she's, she's not like going like,hello, she, she wants something

(18:55):
and I don't know what it's,
I cannot provide it.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: I gave three exams this week and (18:58):
undefined
I have so much grading to do,and I have another one on Monday.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: I am gonna do something insane (19:04):
undefined
and apply to an English faculty

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (19:10):
Nice.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: job writing specifically. (19:10):
undefined
And I can already, like, I doremember how much grading it was.
Like I don't have amnesia about it.
I, I hope that I'm faster at it nowand maybe have some better habits.
But
I do, uh, think it would befun to be teaching writing.

(19:32):
Again, it's not just writing.
They also need literature, whichwasn't ever my thing, but I can do it.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Yeah, I hated being an English (19:37):
undefined
teacher because that's what I did
at

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: Uh, all of it. (19:41):
undefined

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: It, I liked the classes, I liked (19:42):
undefined
the conversations that we got into.
I liked the technical details becausein our field there are no like
technical, like hard facts usually.
It's usually theoriesand, and that kinda stuff.
And so it was nice to have, you know,some, some hard facts to, to deal with.
But it was so much gradingand so much bad writing.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (20:07):
Yeah.
The thing I'm worried about isthe fact that it is gonna be
so much AI generated essays.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Did, did I, I probably have not told (20:14):
undefined
you the story of the one of the, thefirst assignment for the semester was
to take a word from the dictionary andwrite basically a short essay about it.
Like, look up the definition of it, lookup the history of it, that kind of thing.
And I was like, you could use a cussword if you want to, like, fuck.
Because I thought that would be fun.

(20:34):
Right.
This kid decided he is gonna putFuck me Harder daddy as his term.
Like,

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (20:42):
That's not,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (20:43):
yeah, we had to have a conversation about that.
And he wrote his, he rewrote it.
He like was so embarrassedand I was like, no.
I let him rewrite it because thatwas just some very bad judgment.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: is this a freshman who, (20:55):
undefined

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Yes, it was a freshman. (20:56):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: okay, so they just, they (20:58):
undefined
heard academic freedom and.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Yeah, went for it. (21:02):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: I always was, I would never (21:04):
undefined
have done something like that.
Like there I do, I still thinkback sometimes on the essays I
wrote, especially in undergrad, andI'm like, oh, that's so cringey.
What a stupid, what a dumbthesis, or something like that.
Like, I'm already judgmental.
I was pretty good.
Like I was a decent I don't knowabout writer, but like I wasn't

(21:26):
making dumb arguments and I'm stillkind of judging myself about them.
So if I had done some shit like that,my millennial ass would just pass away.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (21:34):
Right.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: The millennials and Gen Z (21:35):
undefined
are fighting online again.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Are they? (21:37):
undefined
Why

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (21:38):
I am, I am not super sure, but what I
saw was some Gen Z people are like,they're kind of mad at millennials.
For not preparing them.
It's weird.
I don't know.
Like for what I don't know.
Or, or it could just be that like generalfeeling of I can't believe you didn't
fix the world before you gave it to me.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (21:58):
right.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (21:58):
that a lot of people feel like it's just Gen Z's
turn to go through it and they happento be directing at millennials because
they're confused about the generations.
I saw some people, somebody on TikToksaid that they had been fighting
with a Gen Z person that thoughtthe boomers fought in World War ii

. beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (22:15):
Oh,

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (22:16):
Do you know how old those people would be?
Do you know what boomer means?
What do you think Boomer means?
I'm dying to know in your mind wherea nickname like that comes from.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: That's funny. (22:30):
undefined
I can't keep straight who after, after.
'cause I'm a, a millennial,an al or however you say it.
The generation between Gen X

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: think it's Zen, (22:40):
undefined

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (22:41):
Yeah, because the, like there was definitely
a culture change for, for a very brief,like we were the last ones to, to take
typing on typewriters and the first
ones to learn word

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: Mavis, beacon. (22:52):
undefined

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (22:53):
Yeah.
I mean, I, I learned how totype on a word processor.
In my freshman year, in my senior year,I learned word perfect on a computer.
Like it was evolving that fast.
And we were the last ones that had, youknow, computer free Christmases and uh,
TV shows and, and that kind of stuff.
And we were the first ones toexperience a OL and other online joys.

(23:15):
So I think we're a unique blendof, of the two generations.
' cause there's some gen,
uh, gen X stuff.
I just don't get.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (23:24):
Yeah.
Well, and, and Gen X hadthis, the difficult job of.
Creating the digital age and, anddigital era, but like trying to de
to decode or predict what it wasgonna look like and they were wrong.
Uh, it's kind of fun on YouTube.
You can find old like news reels ordocumentaries of the transhumanists

(23:48):
and these folks like talking aboutwhat the web is gonna be like
and what it's gonna provide us.
I don't know if it's that we justdecided not to do it or it wound up
not being as fun as we thought, but wejust, well, and we probably commodified
it to a point that it, it wasn't, youknow, became completely not for us.
It is for making money.

(24:08):
It's not for people.
So, yeah, it was the youngerGen X who weren't building it,
but were kind of inheriting it.
And then the older millennials whowound up being the digital people.
Do you know what I was doing inmy typing, Mavis Beacon classes?

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (24:28):
What?

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (24:29):
I was getting on the internet and going
into chat rooms and meeting girlsonline because they let us have
the internet on in the computerlab, in the computer classroom.
And I got caught of course, but I,I kind of miss those chat rooms.
You could go in andjust kind of be whoever.

(24:51):
Sometimes I would be a, a jerkand then get booted and then just
create a new handle and go back inagain and be a different person.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (24:58):
I made a lot of friends on a OL people
that I'm still friends with today.
Well, most of them, no.
Most of them have followed bythe wayside, a few of them I'm
still friends with today.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (25:09):
I actually, I wasn't on a OL that
much by the time that came around.
I had gone to college and Ididn't have a computer in college.
Most of the, the time I spent onthe internet during those, like
formative years was from like eighthgrade to 12th grade in high school.
And it was the school computers,so I couldn't create my own login.

(25:33):
It couldn't do a OL.
But there were these mud userrooms, multi-user dungeon that.
Quite a few of the kids fromschool would go into actually,
and we would just tell each otherwho our, like, my handle is this.
And so we could, it was interesting.
It was like we were hanging out with eachother and strangers in these chat rooms.

(25:53):
I think they were just IRC chatrooms, internet relay chat.
They weren't anything associatedwith an actual login or email
address or anything like that.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (26:02):
Do you remember your early, uh, screen names?

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (26:06):
Yeah.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (26:07):
Mm.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (26:07):
the longest time I was Human Beans
I thought it was clever as hell.
I, I actually used that one onMySpace too for a long time.
What about, do you remember any of yours?

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Yeah, mine was Case and Trance (26:21):
undefined
and it looked like it was caseentrance, my two cats were.
Casey and Trance, so it was Caseand Trance and I thought also
that was very intelligence to do.
But yeah, I was Case andTrance for a long time.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: some of them are actually still my (26:36):
undefined
passwords, so I'm not gonna share.
I had used my cats before though,
like cat names one time when David wasin from Iraq, he often either wouldn't
have, have a, a current license andso he wasn't licensed to drive and
so I would take him places and I tookhim through the ATM line at the bank.

(27:01):
And so he was in the passenger seat andhe just gave me his card and he told
me his pin and it was the same as mine.
We had chosen the exact same pin.
That was back when you chose your pin

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (27:13):
Right.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (27:14):
and I just looked at him and I was like, you picked,
okay, that's my pin as well in case youever need to get into my bank account.
It, I mean, it wasn't justa random number, it was a
number from our childhood, butwe both picked the same one.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (27:28):
Right.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (27:29):
I think, I don't know, I think we
would've been friends if he'd stayedalive, but we also probably would
disagree about a shitload of stuff.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (27:36):
Do you think he would've been a Trumper?

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: I don't know. (27:37):
undefined
I think about that actually pretty often.
You know, I think about mydad his Republican ness and
his, uh, Baptist ness and.
How worried I was for him.
Like he watched Fox News all thetime for a long time, like that was
his thought train, was all of theseextremely worryingly and increasingly

(28:00):
retrograde conservative positions.
But Trump was just a bridge toofar for him and he can't stand him.
And it's made him intoa Democrat, I think.
I think, uh, my dad made the party shift,like he's the last stop on the party shift
express, like he's finally a democrat.

(28:20):
When the Democrats have been theprogressive party for 20 years now, 30
years more, God, what fucking year is it?
You know what I mean?
Party shift happened in the, itbegan in the late sixties depending
on where you are located in the us.
And it hit.
Where he was living in the seventiesSo by then he was like staunchly
identified with the Republicanparty as the party of progressives.

(28:43):
Like he, one of the reasons he registeredRepublican was their anti-racism.
So for him, small government, all thosetalking points, they were also, they made
sense in the context of civil rights.
The government shouldn'trestrict people's freedom.
But as the Republican party becamethe party of Nixon and then Reagan and

(29:07):
began its very racist campaign, it, likethat, the party shift was to the people.
It actually happened to.
We talk about it like it'sall theoretical to the people.
It actually happened to, it happenedpiecemeal and it took parts of
their beliefs and made them meansomething else in a different context.
It's, it's basically the mechanism bywhich they pitted people against each

(29:28):
other, and so for a long time there, hisidentity as a Republican was weaponized
against his ideals of equality And Ithought it was gonna be permanent because
it clearly happened to multiple people.
Right.
The Republican party twisted on everybody.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (29:43):
Yeah.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (29:43):
So I guess to answer your question.
It's possible David could have avoidedbecoming a Trumper, but I don't,
I'm not a hundred percent confident.
He kept a blog for a while thereand he really didn't like Obama.
And I'm pretty sure itwas for racist reasons.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (29:58):
yeah,

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (29:58):
Do you remember like really early in Obama's
political saliency, there was a lotmade of how similar his name was to os

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: yeah, I do. (30:07):
undefined
That's why, that's why Trump stillsays Hussein, uh, Barack Hussein Obama.
That's exactly why he says it that way.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (30:16):
Yeah, there was a lot of, like, he saying that he
observes Ramadan and stuff like that,saying that he's Muslim when he is not.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (30:22):
Yeah.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (30:23):
And that's, that stuff I think really affected David.
He, 'cause on his blog, I, he hadwritten something and I was like.
What are you talking about?
Like, Obama's not gonna do anythingto, like, I know that you are fighting
a war, a proxy war essentially.
And a lot of brainwashing wasgoing into them probably while they

(30:45):
were over there fighting that war.
But it started to reallycome out as racism.
And I think racistsjust really like Trump.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Well, yeah. (30:53):
undefined
He's one of them.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (30:55):
Yeah.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (30:55):
And he makes it okay to put it out in the open.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: The stuff people will say on the (30:57):
undefined
internet with their whole governmentname on their Facebook profile.
Jesus Christ.
I was, I saw the pink news post onFacebook about the trans genocide
and people were in there like,it can't happen soon enough.
It's too slow.
Kill them all right now,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (31:15):
Jesus.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: How did we get there? (31:15):
undefined
I can't remember ever beinglike, I know I grew up in racism.
I know that I grew up in white supremacy,but I never once remember anybody
saying, that person should be killed.
They should die.
They don't deserve to livebecause of this identity.
There was always someroundabout excuse, right?
It was encoded.

(31:36):
It's just out there now.
They're just saying it.
I don't know if that's better or worse.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Well, there was some, uh, being (31:40):
undefined
out loud with it back then.
My grandfather had a dogthat he named the N word.
that was the, was thatkind of racist, you know?
And then my great-grandfather, his,he always went by Jefferson D was the
name that everybody called him, right?
And I have been doing the family history.
His name was actually ThomasJefferson, and he told people

(32:02):
that it was Jefferson Davis.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (32:04):
Oh,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: A lot of different contexts there. (32:05):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (32:07):
I also knew someone who named their dog that,
and I remember I had gone over tostay at somebody's house overnight,
and I was like, I do not like you.
That is messed up.
Because they loved to just go out andholler for the dog to come in at night.
Ugh.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (32:24):
Yeah.
My grandpa was a piece of work.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (32:27):
Yeah.
And I remember that racism and I,but not like, I would like to give
an oral argument about how I believethese people should be murdered and.
Publicly talking, likemaking it your personality.
I don't know.
It seems like people don't reallyhave personalities anymore though.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Oh, that's true. (32:47):
undefined
I can't tell my studentsapart from each other anymore.
There's like three prototypes.
They're one of the three.
And the problem child is always, always,always a kid named Cameron always.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (33:08):
Somebody, I saw a teacher online doing a bit of, like,
she was trying to remember her students,but she was doing dory's bit from
Finding Nemo where she's always callinghim different things like har bingo.
Your name is?
Whatever comes out of my mouth.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (33:24):
I just call them you and avoid it completely

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: I mean, what's the point? (33:27):
undefined
They're gonna be gone in a few weeks.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: I've got a kid. (33:30):
undefined
So after class the other day two girlswaited till everybody else was gone and
they were like, we don't know if you wereaware of this or not, but this one guy,
as soon as you take roll call and youlook the other way, he bolts out the door.
And I was like, I was not aware of that.
Thank you for letting me know.
And I was like, I wonder who it is.
And they were like, oh, it's this guy.

(33:51):
And I was like, okay.
But I still don't knowwhich ones they are.
So they had an exam on Thursdayand I waited to see which guy he
was and I'm gonna be sending himan email, so we're gonna see.
Yeah, that's some balls though.
That's not the, like, the craziestthing I think anybody has done
in class besides make tacos wasvape in the middle of class.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (34:11):
Hmm.
Did you ever go to class likeviolently high or, you know, like

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Oh yeah. (34:15):
undefined
When I first started college, thefirst time around, it was game on.
Like I was like, that'swhy I got kicked out.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (34:27):
Yeah, right.
Yeah, I was just thinking about howI mean, I know that that vape was
probably some sort of like flavoredthing or maybe a nicotine vape, but
like you could also get there, therecould be weed ones that you're doing
and just a target or something.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Oh yeah. (34:41):
undefined
You can't tell a part anymore

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (34:43):
Yeah.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: unless you (34:44):
undefined
really know what you're looking for.
But if you're just a general lay person,you're not gonna know the difference.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (34:50):
Yeah.
I.
I don't think I, I didn't goto class like high or anything.
I did go to class on acid once.
It was awful.
It,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (34:59):
I bet,

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (35:00):
and I think, I think the teacher knew.
I, I didn't expect to still be tripping.
I, I don't know what I thought wasgonna happen because I took the stuff
at like 3:00 AM so it wasn't smart.
And the class was at 11
and then I went to Thunderover Louisville after that.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (35:15):
Lord, you're just invoking all the senses, eh?

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (35:19):
Yeah.
Oh my God.
What a weekend that was.
think I was, I was 19, so Ididn't, I didn't last much
longer than that in school.
But yeah, it was so roughand it, because it was.
A little bit after the peak and Ihad taken a pillow with me to class.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Like you do. (35:38):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (35:39):
I think I really thought I was killing it too.
I thought I was blending in.
I didn't have my book or anything.
I walked in and it was this likegiant ancient echoy building
on E K's campus called Wallace.
And it had, you remember those heavydesks that had the metal frame?
It was all one, the front andthe chair together, and, but it

(35:59):
was like marble instead of wood.
Like it wasn't marble, but it waslike this really heavy composite.
And anytime you move 'em, they go, like,
I walked into class and because I didn'thave my book, I grabbed my desk that
I usually sit in behind this friend ofmine named Mary and just scooted it up
into the middle of the aisle and satnext to her so I could share her book.

(36:23):
And then the professor, and I don'teven know if I'm remembering this
accurately or not, but in my mindhe stood directly in front of my
desk and delivered the lecture.
So I was sitting there with this, and itwasn't just a, a pillow, it was like this
pillow full of like material that wasreally loud, like a peanut husk, you know,
it was one of those like sensory ones.

(36:44):
And I just sat there and rolled it betweenmy fingers like this for the full ever.
How long we were in class.
I, I think it, hopefully it wasjust a 50 minute class, but I'm
thinking it might've been 75 minutesand just prayed for it to be over.
Never again.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: That's hilarious. (36:57):
undefined
Have you ever seen the movieHow High Method Man and Red Man?

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: Oh, yeah, yeah. (37:02):
undefined
Where they're growingweed in their dorm room.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: is where they go to school. (37:06):
undefined
There's a scene where, uh, red Man, heis taking a women's studies class and he
like, goes really high and he, there's,he has a vision of the professor climbing
all over him and then he ends up failing.
He's like, I fail women's studies.
I love bitches.

(37:27):
That movie is so quotablelike, like so quotable.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (37:31):
What's the movie you think you quote the most often?

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Either how high or, (37:34):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (37:37):
It's probably dropped dead gorgeous for me.
Yeah,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: a cheerleader. (37:41):
undefined
I'd say probably.
How high.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (37:44):
I gonna take this itchy hat off.
There we go.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Hi Petera. (37:46):
undefined
We're having a stare down.
She looks so funny whenshe's not wearing clothes.
It's like she's naked walkingaround, free balling everywhere.
She's a burrower.
She likes to get under, likeput her head under blankets
and stuff, so she stays warm.
She'll just get up and go to bed.
Like she'll be like, fuck y'all, I'mgoing to bed and just go on back there.
And it's like, all right, good night.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (38:08):
See, uh, you know who I saw on TikTok?
Hank Azaria was on there talking about howit's the 30th anniversary of the Birdcage,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Oh wow. (38:17):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: which is harrowing. (38:18):
undefined

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (38:19):
That

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: It's not, it shouldn't be, (38:19):
undefined

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: I've been watching a lot of old, (38:21):
undefined
uh, that's my thing is I watch oldmovies when I'm grading, or Ancient
Aliens is another one I watch a lot.
But like right now, wehave saved the last dance.
We're halfway through it.
I paused it to to record with you.
We watched Clueless

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (38:34):
Oh,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (38:34):
today.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (38:35):
nice.
What did I watch?
I watched some I's really awful movie.
It was a horror movie, but it was, itwas like playing in my face basically
about how much it was pretending to bea terrible nineties teen horror movie.
And I was like, what are you doing?
Like, who do you think you're talking to?
Like, is Gen Z gonna appreciate this?

(38:55):
I don't know.
Are nineties kids gonna appreciate it?
I also can't tell if I appreciate it.
I watched the whole thing.
It's called Whistle.
And it's got one of the girlsfrom Yellow jackets in it.
The one that plays the young shit.
Well, I forgot her name.
Melanie Linsky.
Character

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: I have not seen that show. (39:13):
undefined
It's behind a paywall.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (39:16):
Shauna.
She plays a young Shauna.
It's on Sling.
Sling is free.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Oh, that's new then. (39:20):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (39:22):
It, yeah, it, it's actually been in
production hell for quite a few years.
Probably a lot of people suspectbecause of what's her face?
Juliette Lewis.
So recently it's showed upon, I think it's on Netflix.
Yeah, it's on Netflix now.
So.
God, it's everywhere.
Hulu Sling, RokuParamount, Netflix, Amazon.

(39:47):
You probably have to pay for it onAmazon though, but yeah, it, I, it's
not syndication because that doesn'tquite apply, but like they are
having to try to recoup some costsbecause it's been in development.
Hell not development Helm.
'cause they made it, they made fourSeasons, but something happened with some
people who had disputes of some kind.
And then also because of COVID, they gotserious delays because Juliette Lewis is

(40:13):
a Scientologist and so she refused to getthe vaccine and so they couldn't film.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Oh wow. (40:17):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (40:18):
Yeah, I was pretty bummed when I found out that
she was not like the fun kind of bitch.
She was the Scientologist kind.
Like, oh, you're less.
My crush is gone now.
I still really love her andeverything though, you know,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (40:30):
Yeah,

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: you know, she doesn't care if (40:31):
undefined
I have a crush on her or not.
I'm sure she loves herself justfine, but I think she really
is crazy in real life though.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (40:38):
yeah.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (40:39):
I,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: I think all Scientologists (40:39):
undefined
are, maybe that's just me.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: or a little stupid, right. (40:42):
undefined
I think Tom Cruise is kind of dimwitted.
And also like he just, he really comes offas somebody who barely ever knows where
he is and, and unfortunately he also seemslike kind of a nice dude, but they protect
him from everything else that they do inthere because he's their main recruiter.
Especially now that so many of the restof their like mega recruiters either

(41:06):
passed away or are disgraced now.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (41:08):
Right.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (41:09):
they were.
Closet cases or predators.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Laura Pon, the Donna from that (41:13):
undefined
seventies show she has De Scientologyherself, I'm proud of her for

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (41:20):
Yeah.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: I always loved Hot Donna. (41:20):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (41:22):
Yeah.
Good for her.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (41:23):
Yeah.
That was the only strikeI had against her.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (41:26):
Same.
Yeah.
It's like, wow, I reallylike your whole vibe.
Did you watch Agatha All Along Long?

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (41:31):
No,

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: That one is behind a paywall. (41:32):
undefined
Uh, it's on, it's a, it's a Marvelthing, so it's on Disney Plus.
You might be able to buy it individuallyor whatever, or maybe it falls off
the back of a truck somewhere and.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: have Hulu. (41:44):
undefined
I don't know if that means I have Disney.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (41:47):
It might, I mean, no, I don't know if
it goes both ways, but like you canlook and see if you, and sometimes
you can use your Hulu login.
But it's got Kathryn Hahn,who I am obsessed with.
She is so attractive and just like her,she's funny and beautiful and like, I

(42:08):
hope I age as well as her, you know,because she's, I think in her fifties
and still just so like, radiant.
But she plays Agatha, this witch,and it's about this coven of witches.
So it's, it's like a veryfemale-centric cast and story and stuff.
And Aubrey Plaza playsher girlfriend in it.
So this is the first likeliterally queer Marvel thing.

(42:30):
I have no idea why.
Oh, uh, I saw a, a video of some,you know how they do those red carpet
interviews and somebody asked her.
Do you have Riz?
And she was like, do I have what?
And they said, do you have Riz?
And she said, you're gonna haveto tell mommy what Riz means.
And I was like,
careful, some of uscan still get pregnant.

(42:53):
Like hardly anybodyhas my number like her.
But she's been in quite a few movies too.
But like, I think I, I want you towatch her in something and, and,
'cause she's hilarious and I thinkthat's part of what her attraction is.
Agatha all along is from like 2023.
What if we just reviewed Agatha allalong, just randomly a 3-year-old TV show.

(43:13):
Nobody's asking for this.
And that's what QueerNeck likes to deliver.
Uh, listeners, should we reviewAgatha all along or the bird cage?

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: We've been watching a show (43:28):
undefined
called The Way Home on Netflix.
I like time travel stuff.
It's a, a, a sub genrethat I enjoy quite a bit.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (43:38):
Mm-hmm.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Leap in my youth, I think, (43:39):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (43:40):
Yeah.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: it's a little bit cheesy. (43:41):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: Oh, the Andy McDowell show. (43:42):
undefined

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (43:44):
Yeah.
But it's, it's good enough towatch, you know what I mean?
It's not so cheesy thatyou can't watch it.
So there's a time travelingpond that they jump into.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (43:53):
I was gonna ask you something, and then I
started reading about, well, maybe it'sa good time to hear a word from our
sponsor, 'cause we've been talking a lot.
So, uh, this week's episode of Queernecksis sponsored by Spring Cleaning.
Happy Spring, uh, well springcleaning arrives the first afternoon.
Warm enough to open every window at once.
Suddenly the sun is inside the house.

(44:15):
Auditing your life like it's notto blame for this mess in the first
place, for abandoning us for fourmonths dust that lived peacefully, all
winter lawyers up and pleads its case.
The place smells like lemon, cleaner coldair, and the faint suspicion that somebody
should have done this quite a while ago.
The closets and cornerspiled high with detritus.

(44:35):
Begin giving testimony a singleglove, three extension cords
that haven't worked since 1998.
a mayonnaise jar full ofmysterious screws that totally
belong to something important.
Spring cleaning lifts each pieceof evidence up to the auditing
light and ask the same question.
Are you still part of the storyor are you just taking up space?
In the kitchen, cabinets get rearrangedwith newfound moral authority.

(44:59):
Spices older than severaladministrations are sniffed,
tapped and given one more season.
To deplete the refrigerator becomesa museum of good intentions.
Out on the porch, somebodyshakes a rug so hard.
It looks like a minor weather event.
The yard fills with the sound of broombristles, screen doors, and the universal
language of someone discovering the samebox of cords they swore they got rid of

(45:21):
last year . Spring cleaning also revealsthe true emotional range of a household.
One person becomes a minimalist anda prophet another forms an immediate
attachment to a cracked mixing ball thathas not been used since Dial up internet.
The negotiations begin andmemories are invoked, and
reputations are staked on the line.
Eventually a few bags leave thehouse a few shelves, breathe lighter.

(45:44):
Windows stay open long enough forthe place to remember what fresh air
feels like, and by evening, everyoneis sitting in a much cleaner and
slightly emptier room, tired butsatisfied, surrounded by the objects
that survived the annual trial.
This week's episode is sponsoredby Spring Cleaning Emotional trauma
with Pine Sol and a washcloth.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: I like that one. (46:03):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (46:04):
Did we, did you do spring cleaning, like as a family

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: No, my mom was anal retentive (46:08):
undefined
and just cleaned all the time.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (46:12):
year round?

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: yeah, she, (46:13):
undefined
that my dad was that was oneof his, he was abusive and
that was one of his things.
He insisted upon a clean houseand she just, I mean, she
got married when she was 16,

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (46:23):
yeah.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: the way that she kept house. (46:23):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (46:25):
It was a full, a whole family affair thing.
And my mom did have obsessivecompulsive disorder, and so we
all had to participate in that.
So our printing, spring cleaningwas pretty fucking intense.
She, like, they were, they werethe mop, the, the wall mops.
Right?
So these mops didn'tget used on the floor.
They were just for the walls andyou like soak 'em, you know, it

(46:47):
was like the squeegee kind of mop.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (46:48):
Right.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (46:49):
When we were really little though, she
would do kind of fun, weird things.
So, she would tape sponges to our handsand knees and then just slop the house,
like the kitchen floor in mop water, andwe would all just like sploosh around
in it and clean the floor that way.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: That's fun. (47:05):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (47:06):
Yeah.
But that as we go got older,it got a bit more serious.
And so it was really just likecleaning shit with a toothbrush, man.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Yeah, that's (47:13):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (47:14):
I did like the way it smelled though,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (47:16):
Yeah.
We've been doing some cleaningaround here, we need to do more.
There's just
nowhere to put anything inthis apartment, so it all just
piles up.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: Yeah, like Felix is about to try (47:25):
undefined
to climb up on a, this is a loadbearing pile of books, buddy.
The whole house will comedown if you knock that over.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (47:33):
Big stretch when, uh, she had a big stretch.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (47:37):
Yeah, I think I might clean some, like I sort
of cleaned this room a little today.
I also have the dumb job things to do.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Yeah, I've been grading all day. (47:46):
undefined
I had to get caught up on my onlineclass, and then I had, I'm doing
the exams for my other class,

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: I told the students I'm leaving (47:54):
undefined

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Oh, how'd that go? (47:56):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: or was fired. (47:57):
undefined
They're upset.
One.
One of 'em goes, I'm gonna find her rightnow and tell her why it's a dumb idea.
I was like, she knows whyyou think it's a dumb idea.
She doesn't care.
So I have to go see them in person onTuesday and try to, I'm not gonna talk 'em
down because they, if they want to, thisis how they need to express themselves,

(48:18):
then I just need to make sure they're notwasting their time or interfering with my
shit 'cause I don't want to deal with it.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (48:24):
Right.
That's understandable.
so I teach one class in anonline university, right?
So the, everything's online.
and you as the, as the professor, youdon't really get any say so over the
syllabus or the assignments or whatever.
You're just kind of a glorified grader.
And so the first and their eight weekmodule, or eight week classes, so
the first module they have to do adiscussion board post and a short paper.

(48:49):
And the short paper I had to, eightpeople had turned it in scores so high
that I had to tell them to rewrite it orI would submit it for academic review.
Eight out of 31.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (49:00):
What was it?
Copy and paste, or was it AI

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Uh, most of it was copy and paste. (49:03):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (49:06):
from articles like they were misattributing.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (49:10):
Most of them were papers that were turned
into the same university recently.
So somebody's posting stuffsomewhere and they're finding it

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (49:17):
Yeah,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: the, like, they offer the same (49:18):
undefined
class a hun like a hundred times.
Like there's so many people at thatuniversity that there's so many
sections that I'm sure somebody'sposted it somewhere, but it's like they
don't even know that her ITIN exists.
Like, we're gonna catch you.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: that's what I was about to say. (49:32):
undefined
Like one of the things I was thinkingfor starting teaching writing again
is like just doing a presentation atthe very beginning on what I see when
you turn something in, like, here'show it proves to me that this is AI
and here's how I will prove that it.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: I gave a student a zero on an (49:50):
undefined
exam today because he cheated.
Like you said, you can see everythingyou do, you can see every click
he made and he went outside ofthe exam, like every question.
And so I gave him on a hundred pointexam, I gave him a big fat zero.
And on his essay question, he clearlyhad used AI for that 'cause it had random
bolded words on a list and it was bad.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (50:12):
I saw this nursing faculty person talking on
TikTok, uh, and she showed like somebodyhad submitted quiz and they, and they
copy and pasted the answer into the quizapparently without reading it because it
said, looks like you're trying to solve,uh, a question about volumetrics in

(50:32):
prescription or something like, you knowhow chat GBT, I guess will say like, it
looks like you're trying to solve this.
And it said, without the specificquestion, I can't really, you know,
tell you this, but here's how,here's how I could, would structure
this or something if I couldprovide you the answer basically.
And it was like, in what worldwould you go through the trouble
of copy and pasting that horseshit from chat GPT into an essay?

(50:56):
Why would you even click submit on that?

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (50:58):
Right.
I, that's a good questionfor many of these kids.
Why would you click submit on that one?
One person, uh, they, they wrote anessay and they submitted it and then
they immediately wrote me an email thatthey had resubmitted it and please grade
Version two, don't look at version one.
They said because they had writtensomething in there that was a
placeholder, and it didn't, theydidn't mean for it to be turned in.

(51:20):
So of course I opened it because Iwanted to know what it was, and it, they
had basically had most of their paper,but their, their, for their thesis
statement, they had fuck bitches get money
and it was a girl, whichis what made even funnier.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: I mean, I'm not mad at that. (51:37):
undefined

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Right, right. (51:38):
undefined
I just told her that I couldn't see it,so, but yeah, that was, it made me laugh.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (51:47):
Like for a placeholder if boy, you, you
really do want to remember it though.
I mean,
but I, yeah, I've donestuff like that before.
I haven't turned it in.
I, I don't think I've done anythingquite like that, but I, I get, I
do weird things when I'm writing.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (52:02):
One time I turned in my, I was trying to
tell my professor that I was turningin my, my homework sheet I put a
homework shit and sent it and she justwrote back with like some question
marks and I was like, oh my God.
I was so embarrassed, but we're likefriends on Facebook to this day, so it
didn't tarnish my reputation, but I wastrying to say sheet and I said, shit.
So.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (52:27):
Did you bring a noun of Appalachian interest?
I.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: did, I did. (52:29):
undefined
This one is dedicated to my friendCooter, who is an Appalachian legend.
He's, I wanted to havehim on the show someday.
He's a, he is a hell of a guy.
right, so this week's noun of Appalachianinterest is the Sheetz parking lot.
if you grew up anywhere near Appalachia,you already know that the sheets

(52:50):
parking lot is not just a parking lot.
It's a gathering place, ameeting spot, a social club with
fluorescent lights and gas pumps.
For folks who might not know, sheetsis a sprawling combination of gas
station slash fast food joint thatstarted in Pennsylvania in 1952.
Bob Sheets turned his littledairy store into what is now a
whole Appalachian institution.

(53:12):
These days, sheets is known fortwo things, cheap gas and food that
you put on order on a touchscreenat two in the morning when you
suddenly decide mozzarella is.
Sticks are a life priority, but thereal action is not inside the store.
The real action happensoutside the sheets.
Parking lot is where teenagersgather after football games.
It's where somebody's cousin isleaning against a pickup truck, telling

(53:34):
the same story for the fourth time.
It's where you run into people thatyou haven't seen since middle school
and end up talking for 30 minuteswhile holding a bag of curly fries and
sometimes things get a little dramatic.
My friend Cooter once got into a Facebookargument with a guy that's decided
the best way to settle things wasthe most Appalachian idea imaginable.
Meet me in the sheets parking lot.

(53:55):
Now, Cooter, bless him, is oneof the funniest people I've ever
known, but he is also what youmight call a mountain of a man.
Not the sort of person mostfolks would pick for a fist fight
unless they had lost all sins.
Well, Cooter actually showed up.
He parked his motorcycle, leaned againstit, and he waited and waited and waited.
The other F folk never appeared.
Uh, well that's one theory anyway,my own working theory is that the guy

(54:18):
drove by, took one look at Cooter,standing there under the lights, like a
six foot something Appalachian bouncerand just kept on a going, no fight, no
yelling, just a quiet tactical retreat.
Cooter won that contest that right thereis the sheets parking lot experience.
Half community hangout, half place whereinternet arguments threaten to turn into
something real until somebody decides.

(54:40):
Maybe they'd rather just go home.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (54:42):
But I think people are still doing that.
I saw, I saw some beef on TikTok,people tagging each other and they
were, the one guy was like, I'm inthe field right now, where are you?
And I was like, oh my God.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: The, one of the funniest (54:52):
undefined
parts of that Cooter fight.
'Cause it was public on Facebook, I swear,ever, like he, he has a lot of followers.
So it showed up in my feed isthe guy said, all right, I'm
gonna meet you at 2,700 hours.
And everybody was like, whatthe fuck is 2,700 hours?
Like what meeting in a third dimensionor something like, don't even make sense.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (55:13):
No,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (55:13):
hours.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: that's another planet. (55:14):
undefined

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Cooter is a hell of a guy, but (55:16):
undefined
I wouldn't invite him either.
Whew.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (55:20):
no.
It sounds like nobody ought to,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (55:22):
Yeah.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (55:23):
did you ever have somebody go like,
meet me at the flagpole at 3:00 PM

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: The only fight I was ever in besides (55:26):
undefined
punching my brother in the face,which I'm still very proud of.
I knocked his jaw loose.
Not really, but it felt like it.
This girl showed up.
I was maybe in fifth grade and thisgirl showed up at my house wearing
white pants and wanted to fight.
So we tussled around the front, myfront yard, and then she got mud
on her jeans and ran home crying.

(55:47):
So that was

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (55:47):
Oh,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: fighting experience. (55:47):
undefined

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (55:49):
why would you start a fight in white jeans?
That's,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: I guess she (55:52):
undefined
wasn't a very smart girl to fight me.
She wasn't a smart girl.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: not to victim blame, but I. (55:57):
undefined

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: She started it. (55:59):
undefined
She came to my house.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (56:02):
I remember when fights started to hurt, like, like
there was, there was a, a shift betweenlike fights in elementary school, like,
you know, playground fights or whatever.
And then like around middle school, yeah,people, like, people started, you could
tell we were starting to get musclesand we were starting to be able to
manipulate our body weight a bit better.
And I was like, I don'twanna do this anymore.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Yeah, I never wanted to fight (56:24):
undefined
a girl 'cause hair pulling.
Oh.
I just couldn't handle that.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (56:30):
I didn't find many girls, honestly.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: That's how my mom dropped (56:32):
undefined
outta high school actually.
She got into a fight with somegirl and when she would tell you
the story, she was so proud of it.
'cause she borrowed a boy'sring and bashed the girl.
Like she had her in a headlock and likebashed her like six times in the face.
Mom was like, I felt so bad, but I justkept hitting her they both got suspended
and mom just never went back to schooland that's how she dropped outta school.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (56:56):
Oh yeah, girl fights are, I don't know.
I mean, all fighting, especiallywhen you're a kid, like you're
just looking for any advantage.
Evil, evil things happen in kid fights,
but weirdly, none of them everlike reach for weapons that often.
They're all, they'll just actuallyjust punch and kick a, a grownup.
If I were to get in a fightright now, I'm just gonna pick
up whatever's nearest to me

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (57:18):
Right,

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: and turn it into a weapon. (57:18):
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Like, I'm not gonna punch you,I'm not gonna let you punch me.
There's plenty of tree limbs.
Yeah.
My hands is lethal.
Weapons registered in 17 states.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: going baby? (57:30):
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Where are you going?
Wenda is up and down offthis couch a hundred times.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: She's wondering what you're doing. (57:35):
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beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: There we go. (57:37):
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I turned the light on.
Maybe she'll get down.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (57:40):
Well, what are y'all doing this weekend?

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Uh, grading and Shannon's working (57:42):
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dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (57:44):
Yeah,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: I'll be grading (57:45):
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dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: it's gonna snow here apparently. (57:46):
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beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (57:49):
last night, but it didn't as far or it melted.
I don't know.
I didn't go outsidetoday, so I don't know.
I'm still in my pajamas with my bedhead.
I

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (57:56):
Well, it did, snow a little bit a few
days ago, like just like an inch orsomething, but it's, that doesn't
even, that doesn't really count here.
But yeah, it's gonna snow someshit about seven to 14 inches.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (58:08):
Geez.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: Blizzard warning all of a sudden for (58:09):
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basically the next three or four days.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Oh, that sucks, man. (58:14):
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I'm sorry.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (58:16):
Yeah.
I'm ready for this to be over, dude.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Yeah, I'm really ready for spring though. (58:19):
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I read a, a thing the other day thatsaid we won't have another sunset
before seven 15 until October.
the

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (58:30):
There's.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: behind us. (58:30):
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dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (58:31):
So much daylight here as soon as the time changes.
That is my favorite thing about this placeis that as soon as the time changes, like,
uh, sunset is already after seven 30 here.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (58:44):
Nice.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (58:45):
Yeah.
and like on the longest day ofthe year it'll be 10:00 PM It is
crazy how much daylight there is.
'cause even after the sun goes down,it stays light for a long time because
it's so flat here and nothing exists.
So it's, and there's no what's it called?
Light pollution?
'cause there's no cities or anything.
So it's just daylightfor half of the, the day.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: That's kind of neat (59:10):
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dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: Well, yeah, it's, it's pretty cool. (59:10):
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Like if I, if I was somewherebeautiful, I would love that.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (59:16):
right?

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (59:17):
But when I live in a house that doesn't have any
curtains on the windows and I'm tryingto watch a horror movie, I don't love it.
I, I've lived here for a year nowand I still don't have curtains.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: We don't either. (59:26):
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So we have blinds, but that's it.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (59:30):
Man.
The neurodivergence is rough.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (59:33):
Yeah.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: No, I don't have blinds. (59:34):
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Like there's nothing over my windows.
the neighbors just looking inat whatever I'm doing, and I,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: that for five minutes. (59:41):
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Not, she would

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (59:43):
it bothered me a lot when I first moved in, and then
I just got used to it and stopped caring.
Like, I will change clothes downstairs.
I don't

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: If you're looking, you deserve (59:52):
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to see it is the way I, I feel.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: You're welcome. (59:55):
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You know,

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (59:57):
Take a
picture.
It lasts longer.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: I guess hello Spring. (59:59):
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It's technically here.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Not till the (01:00:02):
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23rd.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (01:00:03):
Yeah.
God won.
Even day is, oh yeah, this is 13th.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (01:00:06):
Yeah.
Still got a little over a week.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941 (01:00:08):
I'm gonna buy me an RV and just leave.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940 (01:00:11):
Nice.
Sounds like a good plan.

dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: Well, listeners, thanks for hanging (01:00:14):
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out with us for another week.
Hopefully it's getting warmer whereyou are and you don't have any more of
this snowy bullshit and I don't know.
Hope you're happy and well and fuckedon, on Trump and all of his bullshit.

beck-guest696_32_03-13-2026_180940: Fuck the law. (01:00:29):
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dashund_31_03-13-2026_170941: How fuck the low free Palestine (01:00:30):
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stop that goddamn war in Iraq.
And yeah.
We'll, uh, we'll see you next time.
Say hi to your mom and 'em.