EP 92: Self-Reflection with the Woman in the Mirror

Have you been challenged by a situation or a nudging that is not going away? Maybe God has you doing things that is uncomfortable and trying to ignore it has come to an end. Well, in this episode, I'm going to share with you a couple of ways how you can look yourself in the mirror, because Sis, it's time. 

Download The Woman in the Mirror journal here: https://bit.ly/womaninthemirrorjournal

Connect with Vernica

Are you ready to reclaim your voice in God through Core Value focused Therapeutic Life Coaching that is Bibilcally based? https://calendly.com/reclaimyv/therapeuticlifecoaching is where you can schedule a 45 minute introduction session with me.

Email: [e-mail]

Get my ABC's of Core Values pdf to begin discovering your personal core values as well as pairing it with the Core Values reflection worksheet to show you how your insecurities does not line up with your values and how God sees you.

P.S. If you love the podcast subscribe, 5 star rate and share with someone you know. This helps me to reach more people all over the world, like you, who is ready to begin reclaiming their voice in God!

Be well,

V

*****

ReClaiming Your Voice is the go-to podcast for Christian women Who Want to Discover God, ReClaim Their Voice and Live Core Values.

Do you struggle with low self-worth, people pleasing, lacking boundaries and not knowing your identity? Do you find that it is difficult to express your needs or maybe life has you believing your needs do not matter? Do you find yourself repeating behaviors that make you feel like you are going backwards in life?

Hey, I'm Vernica Williams! My journey began in 2020 when God told me to come out of my comfort zone. I allowed my insecurities about my voice, not having boundaries and people pleasing since the age of five to hinder me from knowing who I am in Him.

The ReClaiming Your Voice podcast is where you will begin the journey to overcome your insecurities, identify your core values and learn how to live it out...with God. 

Sister-Friend, you are here because you know it is time to come out of your comfort zone. The many layers of comfort that has hindered you from knowing who you are in God.

On the show, you will learn...
*How values and core values can guide you in ways that will change your life.
*YOU have value! Partner with God on your journey towards healing.
*How to come out of the comfort zone and ReClaim your voice in God.

*The 4 Core Pillars

The 4 Core Pillars are: Core values, Core Needs, Core Behaviors and Core Faith

The 4 Core Pillars is a Bible based and practical teaching that will take you on a journey to break free from people pleasing, being co-dependent on the emotions and choices of others and lacking boundaries so you can begin to discover the core of who you are.

It is exciting to know you are here. Let's go on this journey with God together.

Connect with Vernica: [e-mail]

Episode Transcript

Motivational Monday (00:00):
This is the reclaiming your voice podcast.
And I am your host VernisaWilliams.
Do you struggle with low selfworth, people pleasing, lacking
boundaries and not knowing youridentity?
Do you find that it is difficultto express your needs or maybe
life has you believing?
Your needs don't matter.
Do you find yourself repeatingbehaviors that make you feel

(00:23):
like you are going backwards inlife?
If this is you, you are in theright place because I believe
that honoring your needs anddiscovering your values and core
values will begin your journeytowards healing, discovering God
in the midst of it all andreclaiming your voice.

(00:44):
Hey, I am feeling so muchbetter.
Last week I was fighting a coldI'm feeling so much better.
And um, I got a lot of restbecause that was the issue too.
So far behind rest, and I knowthat opened the door for me to
have the sniffles and have tofight it, but hey, we are here.

(01:08):
I am grateful for you.
Shout out to my OGs and mynewbies who are turning into OGs
and my newbies.
If you are new to.
of the show.
I am so grateful for you andeach and every one of you who
have been listening in,downloading the episodes that

(01:32):
has touched you in some kind ofway.
Thank you from all over theUnited States and also countries
I cannot pronounce.
I am so glad, that you are here.
You see what I share is valuablefor you to use your time to
listen in.
So, I greatly appreciate you.

(01:54):
Today, It's going to be one ofthose heart to heart episodes,
y'all.
I want to share with you theconcept woman in the mirror,
basically facing you, I might goa little deep today because I
know looking in a mirror is notan easy thing to do.
It's not.

(02:15):
It is not.
But I'm going to share with youjust a couple of ways.
How you can look at yourself ina mirror and you might even
thinking, why should I?
And behind that question,there's some fear in there.
I know, but it is veryimportant.

(02:38):
Even if you are not.
Experiencing, challenges, evenif you've been doing pretty
well.
I believe that it's always goodevery now and again to look at
yourself in the mirror, even tocheck in with your mind.

(03:02):
And your heart and your soul tocheck in with yourself.
How have you really been doingto check in with your mental
health, your emotional health,your spiritual health, even your
financial health, like yourphysical health, like every area
of your life.

(03:23):
It's always good to check in Ifyou have been following.
Your core values and your coreneeds if you have gotten off a
little bit and you need to reelyourself back in It's it's it's
always good to ask yourself.
How are you as well as when weare dealing with some stuff that

(03:51):
spiritually you must lookyourself in a mirror and deal
with some things that you havebeen Unwilling to look at, to
face, if there are any badhabits that you have going on,
if you have been treating yourchildren in ways that could be

(04:16):
better, if you have beentreating yourself in a way that
could be better, if there aresome fears and doubts you've
been having that you find thathas been keeping you You need to
look yourself in the mirror.
And, um, we're talking aboutthis.

(04:36):
If you are OG, you know thatmany times I share what I've
been going through in real time.
But yeah, lately, for about amonth now, I had to look myself
in the mirror.
And ooh boy, it was difficult.
It was difficult.

(04:57):
The weight, the weight ofSitting in front of the mirror
and looking at myself, andhonestly, I did not do it
physically, but if you feel ledto do that, I really do
recommend for you to literallysit in front of your mirror and

(05:21):
ask yourself, Some hardquestions.
But I had to look myself in themirror and um, sit there
quietly.
There were times where I had totell my brain to shut up and sit
and listen and write down.
The things that were placed onmy heart to consider, to greatly

(05:47):
consider where I am in my lifeand what changes I can make even
if those changes are hardbecause that's the point.
That's the point to make thehard choices to make some
changes.
Whether it has to do withfinancial relational.

(06:07):
There was a time where you canno longer get around it.
Think about what's been going onin your life for a while or
lately where you really feellike I, I really can't get
around this.
It keeps following me.
It's not going anywhere.
That, that right there, have aseat in front of the mirror.

(06:32):
multiple conversations with God,you need to contend, you need to
contend with these things.
Because as you already know, butyou need to be honest with
yourself that if you do not facethese things it will continue.

(06:54):
Those core behaviors that hasbeen continuing in your life.
Because you have been avoidingto look yourself in the mirror.
You know it's going to keepcoming back.
Aren't you tired?
I know I'm tired.
I, when I realized the thing,and I've said this before, that

(07:15):
layers, those layers of um,comfort, under your comfort
zone, it's layers to this.
There are layers to heal fromtrauma.
There are layers regardingdeliverance.
It is layers to let the stuffthat's been attached to our old

(07:36):
man, to let it go.
There's layers to it.
But each layer, we need to behonest with ourselves.
Each layer, we have to submit tohumility.
Each layer, we have to take.
The time necessary to look atourselves.

(08:02):
I mentioned humility.
You know, after you have a seatand what's in your heart reveals
itself to you.
You have to be humble to listento what God is saying to you.
You have to be humble to acceptwhere in your heart that is

(08:23):
hardened, where you have beenresistant, where you've been
scared, where you have beendoubtful.
What has caused you to continueto experience anxiety and
depression over this thing, overthat person, over the situation,
over the decisions that you'remaking, over the ignorance,
things that you just didn'tknow.

(08:45):
You didn't realize that was athing and all of the above is
okay.
But humility, you need to humbleyourself and be brave and
courageous and face the thing.
The second thing is you need totake the time.
Once you are aware and youposition yourself in humility,

(09:09):
you really need to take the timeto contend.
And that looks like getting upearly in the morning or going to
bed earlier and take some time.
I'm going to tell you about anhour.
Give yourself about an hour, atleast, at least that.

(09:34):
Get your journal out.
Your favorite drink.
Okay, position yourself sittingup.
Do not do this laying down.
Do not get super comfortable.
Sit up straight, so that yourbody can be open.
Not closed down, but open.

(09:56):
To receive what you hear, atleast an hour, write down I
didn't know this was a thing.
I didn't know this was, this wasbad.
I, I didn't realize, I don'teven know when this all started.
That's, that's fine.
Because you're going to takethis time with the Lord to flesh
that out.

(10:16):
You may get answers now, you mayget it later.
Sit and write.
Position yourself with humility.
Position yourself in quiet.
That may be hard for you.
That may be something that youare going to have to train
yourself to do.
Because yes, while we arelooking at ourselves in the

(10:37):
mirror, being quiet, that can bescary.
Maybe that's the reason whyyou've been avoiding it.
About how we can positionourselves to be quiet, to face
the quiet, the noise that youhave been listening to, whether
the noise from in yourself,whether it's the noise from
other people's voices, yourspouse, even your kids, like

(11:01):
your, parents, all the voicesthat you have been listening to,
uh, on social media, on YouTube,all the things.
Even other podcasts, all themany voices that you has been
listening to is overload,especially if you are trying to
do these exercises and you feelconfused.

(11:24):
That is a number one sign thatyou have a lot of noise going on
as you are overly stimulatedwith all the things.
Okay, you must find you a placeand time to sacrifice, to write
down what is coming from yourheart.

(11:44):
What is God revealing to you,even the stuff in your mind,
pour it out, write it out,contend.
And look at yourself in themirror.
The next thing is once you arein the space where you like,
okay, I'm writing, I'm fleshingit out.
Okay.
Ow, this hurts.
You're getting uppercuts.

(12:05):
You get jabbed in your stomach.
All the things that's happened.
You are to sit in it.
You are not running.
And this could look like, youknow, if you're in this space,
remember, I'm giving you anhour.
You're in this space and it'sgetting really, really hard.
If you are about to hit thehour, I am daring you to sit for

(12:28):
at least five more minutesbecause like, Oh, it's an hour.
It's getting rough.
Let me, let me leave.
No, no, no humility, sacrifice,contend, sit there for at least
five more minutes and please,before you even get up right

(12:48):
there, what is, what came up foryou before, before you in this
end?
You're sitting, alright?
Write it down because the nextday, when you go over this,
that's where you're going tostart from.
You're going to start from whereit ended the day before.
Okay?

(13:08):
Sit in it.
Next, after we're sitting in it,we're going to take the time to
process, you're going to have totake the time to process what is
going on inside internally.
Okay.

(13:29):
Are you having stomach aches?
Are you having headaches?
Is your body tensing up?
Are you clenching your hands?
Are you clenching your jaw?
What is going on physically?
Why you are sitting in it?
Whether that same day or thenext day, when you come back to
it, be mindful of how your bodyis responding to the hurt, to

(13:52):
the pain, whatever comes up,feeling confused, whatever comes
up.
What is your body doing?
Do you feel hot?
Do you feel itchy?
All the things, document, writeit down, contend with it.
And I want to make sure I saythis.
Have your Bible next to you.

(14:14):
You are not going through thisalone.
Have your Bible next to you.
If you are in the midst ofalready focusing on a certain
topic or you already in yourword, either you're reading
Proverbs or whatever it is.
Bring that with you, and ask theLord to reveal through what

(14:40):
you've been reading.
Ask the Lord to reveal to you asyou are looking yourself in the
mirror.
And last but not least, afteryou.
Approach this in humility as youare sacrificing your time, as
you are contending, as you aresitting and you're documenting

(15:03):
how your body is experiencing.
You have your word with you.
You are praying.
Because you are not going to dothis by yourself.
You are now going to worship.
You are going to acknowledge theLord and thank Him for revealing
this to you.
Thank Him for giving you thepower to sit and be still, the

(15:31):
power to contend, the power tonot be afraid to ask Him the
hard questions.
Right.
It's nothing that we can dowithout him.
There's nothing that we can dowithout him.
And especially with lookingourselves in the mirror, we
definitely cannot do thiswithout him.
We cannot do it in our ownstrength.

(15:51):
Because guess what?
We don't want to do it anyway.
We don't want to do this.
So we need Him.
And every day, when you takethis time to do this, ask Him to
be with you.
Ask Him to sit with you.
Ask Him to contend with you.
Ask Him to help you to keepstill and sit.

(16:16):
You are not doing this alone.
The Lord is with you and I amhere to support you through the
process.
I'm going to place these stepsIn the description area for you
to, to upload so that you haveit.

(16:36):
So if you'd like to make thislike a everyday.
Um, journal prompts, why you arelooking yourself in the mirror,
why you are facing the man orwoman in the mirror, because
only you and God knows how longit's going to be.
Because I'm going to tell you,when I was experiencing this,
it, it was like a month before.

(17:01):
I felt like I can even peep out.
I call it the cave when I'm inthese moments.
I felt like, I now feel like Ican look my head out.
Just reach my head out and lookleft and right.
That I'm still not out yet, butat least I can peep out.

(17:22):
Okay?
I have these journal points andshow notes for you to grab so
that you'll have it.
So I am supporting you throughthe journal promptings and I'm
also here to support you.
Do therapeutic life coaching.

(17:44):
Presently, I have some spotsopen.
So if you are looking tocontinue to reclaim your voice
and go through your journeythrough the four core pillars, I
am absolutely here to supportyou.
My link to my schedule will alsobe in the show notes so you and

(18:07):
I can meet.
We can talk about 45 minutes.
It's to discuss where you are.
If you need a little boost, ifyou need real time
encouragement, and somedirection that you can go
forward with.
So I hope that this episodemeets you where you are.

(18:31):
I pray that you take thisseriously.
It is time for you to lookyourself in the mirror.
To check in with yourself, seewhere you are, see where you are
between you and the Lord and dothe work friend.
This healing on the other sideis so much on the other side is
freedom on the other side whenwe do the work.

(18:55):
All right.
So now and after be well andpeace out.