July 14, 2025 • 17 mins
Surrendering control might be the most powerful choice you'll ever make. During a magical seven-day trip to Newport Beach with my family, I witnessed firsthand how loosening my grip on life's reins creates space for unexpected blessings to flow in.
From the moment we arrived, the universe began confirming this path. My husband opened a piece of mail I would have ignored, discovering a $3,900 check from my second son's birth, nearly three years ago! This wasn't just a coincidence; it was evidence of what happens when we shift from controlling to receiving. The old, calculated Katie who climbed to a C-suite position by age 33 would have been shocked, but the new me simply smiled in recognition.
The magic continued as I embraced spontaneity throughout our vacation. I surprised myself by swimming to a distant dock (to my husband and children's amazement), manifested a long-held dream of treating my entire family to a Duffy boat excursion, and shared a perspective on decision-making that literally gave my family members chills: "I never have FOMO anymore because I believe whatever decision I make is the right decision and exactly where I'm meant to be." This simple yet profound shift has revolutionized my peace of mind. When you trust you're divinely supported, you only need to be 51% confident in any choice, then watch how everything aligns.
Perhaps most meaningful was marking one year since questioning my relationship with alcohol on this very same beach. Last year, I wondered why I was numbing myself during beautiful moments with my children. This year, I returned essentially sober, discovering that life's joy is actually more intense and anxiety-free when experienced with complete clarity. The woman who once thought alcohol enhanced fun now knows true freedom comes from being fully present for every moment, the challenging and the beautiful alike.
Join me on this journey of redefining what it means to live boldly and authentically. Subscribe to She is Redefined and discover how surrendering control might be exactly what you need to find your own magic.
@withkatiesmith
Welcome to She Is Redefined, the podcast that feels like a chat with your best friend over coffee. I’m Katie Smith, and I’m here to help you break free from all those outdated societal expectations and embrace the amazing woman you’re meant to be!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to she is Redefined, the podcast where we
break free from societalexpectations, redefine our
identities and step fully intothe woman we were always meant
to be.
I'm Katie Smith, your host andguide on this journey of
transformation.
Here we're all about embracingchange, cultivating confidence
and living life on our own terms.
Each week, we'll dive intotopics that inspire, challenge
(00:22):
and empower you to redefine whatit means to be you.
Dive into topics that inspire,challenge and empower you to
redefine what it means to be you.
So if you're ready to rewriteyour story and live life that's
bold, authentic andunapologetically yours, let's
dive in.
Okay, not gonna lie, I amrecording this in my car with my
kids as they're playing gameson their little like tablet
(00:43):
thing, and so if you hear anoise in the background, you
might be hearing that right now,but that's why we are going to
roll with it, because I'mrunning errands, I bought one of
those fun little microphonethings, because I have a little
side project that I'm doing withhorses actually, where I need
like a microphone and like achest mount camera, all the
things.
If you are a horse girl, youstay tuned for that Cause it's
(01:06):
actually pretty cool and I havea whole separate like Facebook
group for it.
But I bought one of these funlittle microphones and I'm like,
wait a second, I can use thisin the car when I'm like have
some of my best thoughts and canjust like record faster.
Because that's what I'm allabout these days.
If you have been listening tome, you know that anything
(01:28):
performance feeling I'm notavailable for.
I'm available for alignment andflow and that's it.
First things first.
Because I said the wordalignment and flow, I have got
to brag about how epic of a tripit was to Newport Beach,
california a week ago.
We spent seven days at a beachhouse.
We were there last year at thesame beach house, but we were
(01:49):
only there for four days and theseven days it was literal magic
.
I can't express or find thewords to even share how magical
and in flow it was.
So I want to touch a little biton the conversations I had at
the beach house, kind of wherethings are at for me, and then
(02:11):
also how like magic can happenwhen you really surrender and
just let go of any kind ofoutcome or trying to control
anything.
Cause I really feel that thepast like three to four months,
I mean shoot, really feel thatthe past like three to four
months I mean, shoot, I thinkit's all of 2025 is God has been
teaching me the lesson of trustsurrender completely and trust.
(02:33):
The old Katie was one who wasvery calculated, Like that's how
I actually got as far as I didin corporate America.
I was a C-suite executive atthe age of 33 and very, very
calculated.
And this whole season of mylife, everything that has
happened with my horse and thenmy son, has really taught me
(02:54):
what self-trust is and supportfrom a higher being when you
just completely loosen yourhands off the reins.
If you're a horse girl, youknow what I'm talking about.
No more half halting, no moregrabbing the reins Like Jesus,
take the wheel status.
Okay, you feel me.
And so, over the beach house, um, I've just been looking so
forward to this, everything thathas happened with my son.
(03:15):
I just remember thinking thatwhen we go to the beach house,
it's going to be like we like areset, like we are so good,
we're here, we're together, likewe're going to live our best
lives, and so I just had thatattitude going into it.
And so we get there and my momhands me two pieces of mail and
I was like, oh okay, one thingabout me is I don't love opening
mail.
I don't really know why, but Iusually just like open it like a
(03:38):
day or two later after gettingit.
Well, my husband saw the mailon the table and he's like, hey,
you care if I open your mailfor you, I just want to see what
, what we got here.
And I was like, no, whatever,I'm going to go to the beach
with the boys, like have fun.
And my husband was going to meetsomeone else, uh, one of his
friends, who cause we used tolive in California, and he texts
me a picture and he goes um, soyou're gonna, you're just going
(04:01):
to laugh at this.
And I'm like what?
And he sends me a picture of acheck of $3,904 and like 21
cents or something.
And I just literally laughedbecause I'm like, of course, of
course this happened, of courseI open a check that's written to
(04:21):
me from guess from what?
This is what's going to haveyou trip out even more.
This was from my delivery withmy second son, who will be three
in literally two months, hewill be three years old where
they miscalculated things and Ihad a $3,900 credit that they
just, you know, wrote me thecheck.
Like I die, I can't even likemake this up.
(04:42):
So of course I'm like, yes, ofcourse that happens.
Now, is that abnormal for me?
Kind of, I'd actually have notopened like thousands of dollars
in the mail before.
I've opened like 1200 and 1500,but not like $4,000.
Like that was like a beautifullittle surprise, but I wasn't
(05:03):
surprised at all because of allthe releasing of any kind of
control I've been going through.
It's like it did make sensethat that happened to me,
because I've been in such thereceptive mode, because I
literally don't try to controlanything.
Okay, we're back.
I literally am at a Targetdrive up to get my order and so
I thought I'd do this on the go.
(05:24):
Anyways, so progressing, movingon into the week and the real
conversation that I want tounpack with you, that actually
happened with my two sisters.
So the week we just I just wasso like go with the flow, like I
didn't really have any plans.
I wanted to spend time at thebeach.
I literally was like, if youwant to see me, this is where
(05:46):
I'll be.
Come if you want, don't come ifyou don't want.
I literally was just like I'mdoing me.
I'm hanging out with my family,I'm trying to make this the
most present, memorable tripever.
And I did want to do a Duffyboat because I've missed Duffy
boats, and that was alreadyplanned.
(06:07):
We did that, but I was just sogo with the flow, free spirited,
this trip.
I literally got my hair wet andjumped in the ocean to the point
of my husband then goes.
So there's a public dock, so wego to this public part of the
Bay where you can post up andhang out or whatever, and then
there's like a little jumpingdock that they put to like I
would I don't know maybe 50yards off of the Bay front, that
(06:30):
you can swim to and jump off,and it's super fun.
And so you know, all the youngkids do that and whatnot.
And I jump in the water and getmy hair wet because the boys
like we're like, mommy, are yougoing to go swimming?
And instead of being like theKatie who was like no, I don't
want to get my hair wet, youknow, I was like absolutely,
I'll go swimming, and they got akick out of it.
(06:50):
They like me jumping in gettingmy hair wet.
They got an absolute kick outof it and it was like that's
what it's all about.
You know what I mean.
So then my husband goes I betyou won't swim to that, um, that
dock out there.
And I go, challenge accepted.
And so what do I do?
I swim my little booty all theway out to this dock, literally.
(07:12):
When I got there and thenturned around right, came right
back, right back, cause I didn'tlike go up it and to jump on it
or whatever, climb up on it tojump off.
I did not do that.
And when I was on my way back Iwas a little like he filmed me
and I was like you need to stopfilming, cause, like I'm
hyperventilating, like swimmingis so hard, especially when it's
cold.
Like no joke, I can admit that.
(07:32):
But when I got back, the boyswere like one of them was
actually upset, he was worriedabout me and I was my oldest.
He was like really worked upthat I swam that far and I'm
like don't you think I'm like acool mom?
Like come on.
And my husband was like dude,like that's awesome.
And I mean like who doesn'tlove their husband to feel like
proud of them, right?
Do you know what I mean Like?
So he was all like, yeah, thatwas awesome to the point where
(07:54):
then he wanted to do it and hewas like, okay, this is no joke.
So so it was just like so funand carefree.
Do you know what I mean?
You're probably picking up onwhat I'm laying down with that.
You're getting what I'm saying.
Well, a couple of days later, wego on the Duffy boat.
I even did something where Ibought a second Duffy boat,
which was something I've alwaysenvisioned doing.
I don't know why.
(08:15):
It was like two years ago,where I'm like I want to some
sometime on a trip.
I want to just buy a boat, renta boat for my family, have it
be my treat, cover the drinks,cover everything.
And the opportunity didn'tpresent itself last year, but
then this year it did throughmagic in the universe, and the
(08:35):
way it all fell into place waslike no other way than God
orchestrating it all.
But I was able to like Imanifested that where I was able
to pay for a Duffy boat andtreat everyone to such a fun
experience, when I know thatthat would be something that
normally would just be writtenoff, or like we're not going to
do that.
(08:56):
We have the beach house, that'senough.
And I'm like no, I want to feelelevated, I want to bring back
the memories of a Duffy boat,like it's so fun to see the Bay
from that, that view, thatvantage point on the water, and
so that was really cool.
And then, later that day, mysister, my younger sister, my
older sister, we were allchatting and, just for context,
I have an older sister, an olderbrother, me and then my younger
(09:18):
sister, and so we were allchatting about, like FOMO and
how, like, how do you make theright decision?
And I feel like I alwaysstruggle with this because it's
like I want to do this, but Iwant to do that and I can't make
a decision and I'm superindecisive.
Oh yeah, and my niece, jane,was there.
She's actually twin, anidentical twin.
Her and her boyfriend werethere and we were talking about
this because of college, and Ithen said something.
(09:41):
So, as matter of fact, which ismy own belief, which is I never
have FOMO anymore, when I wassomeone who literally, like FOMO
ran my life, and it's because Ibelieve whatever decision I
make is the right decision Letme say that again for it to land
for you I no longer live byFOMO, because I believe that
(10:01):
whatever decision I end up goingwith is the right decision and
where I'm meant to be.
When I said that it was like Idropped the mother freaking mic,
I'm not kidding.
Everybody was like whoa.
I think someone actually evengot chills by it, which was
crazy.
But it's honest to God, thetruth.
(10:21):
But I want to like unpack thata little bit with you because
it's given me so much peace inmy life and I think it comes
down to the fact of believingand knowing that I'm fully
supported by God, no matter what.
There's a reason I chose to goright instead of left.
There's a reason I decided togo to this party, not that party
(10:44):
.
There's a reason why I wasavailable to go hang out with
this person and not availableanymore to go hang out with that
person or whatever, like if Ihad a plan and somebody asked me
to do something but I wasalready busy, if you're
following me.
And there's a reason and it'sbecause I am divinely supported
and divinely protected.
I've lived through so much inthe past six to seven months
(11:08):
that like I feel like I've agedlike fricking five years, if I'm
being totally honest with you.
But because I've been throughso much.
I deeply believe that whateverdecision I make is where I'm
exactly meant to be, even if itwas such a hard decision.
And I have a rule.
If you're a private client ofmine, I have a rule.
When it comes down to things, Ionly need to be 51%, not 50, 50
(11:29):
, 51% and I'm good.
And I believe and I trust thateverything else works out for me
from that decision.
That's as simple as going tothe movie or not.
That's as simple as grabbingthat cup of coffee or not.
That's as simple as I'm goingto take this route home over
that route.
That's as simple as leaving thehouse five minutes earlier or
five minutes late.
It's all divine protection anddivine intervention.
(11:53):
I truly believe that to my core.
Living the game or living lifeplaying the game of FOMO like,
or living life playing the gameof FOMO like.
Did I make the right decision,waste so much of your time and
more of your energy and that'sall you have.
You only have energy and time.
Without that, you literally gotnothing.
(12:13):
And so it was so fun to havethat for my niece, who's just 21
, for her to be able to startliving her life with more trust
at that young of age.
Gosh, what I would do to goback to Katie at 21 and just
tell her chill out, girlfriend,relax.
When's the last time you took adeep breath, girl, like, if I
(12:34):
could go back I would, so that Ican tell Katie, 21-year-old
Katie, slow down, stop drinkingso much.
I know you're having fun, butis it the real fun?
Because really it.
Nothing is that important,nothing.
It's only the meaning that yougive it.
And then the last thing I wantto touch on, just because I
mentioned alcohol, was this timelast year was when I had the
(12:59):
first thought of not drinkinganymore.
I remember being on the beachwith my sister-in-law and my
nephews and my sons and they'rerunning around having fun and I
was like how, my third beer.
And I remember feeling buzzbecause I'm a lightweight.
And I remember being like whyam I doing this?
Like this is such a beautifulmoment.
(13:20):
I'm on the beach in sunnySouthern California with my
family, with my boys playingwhile they're young.
Like why am I?
Like trying to numb from thisjoy right now?
But that thought didn't totallystick.
It was the first thought thatlike, kind of was like you know,
it was like seated in my brain.
Thanks to God.
And then I remember thinkinglike what's the point of alcohol
(13:48):
?
And then I officially kind ofstopped drinking.
Although I don't have, I don'tbelieve in absolutes, so like do
.
Am I completely sober?
No, but I would say 99% of thetime I'm sober.
Like I bring my ownnon-alcoholic drinks everywhere,
I make my own mocktails, like Ihave a blast with this stuff.
And I did dabble in the THCseltzers for a hot second.
I don't love those, but I diddabble in that for a little bit.
(14:08):
That was just recently witheverything that went down with
my son.
I needed to find a way to relaxa little bit, along with
therapy and everything.
But it was so wild coming fullcircle where I was at the beach
again and I didn't have anyalcohol, maybe had a drink here,
never finished a single drink.
Um, my mom tried to make me adrink.
(14:28):
I ended up taking a couple ofsips and not even drinking it.
Like I'll say yes and I'll behonest with you.
Like I want to party.
There's parts of me that missesthat.
Like that sounds crazy,probably.
And you might be laughing at me, but literally I kept joking
the whole week Like I wish I wasfun still.
Now, of course I'm still fun,like I was.
I feel like I was the funnest ofthe people everyone because I
(14:50):
wasn't getting like buzzed oranything and I was like, yeah,
you guys want to do shots, I'llpour them for you, no problem,
you guys want to do this, youwant to have a dance party?
Like I am still fun, so don'ttake it out of context, but I
joke where it's like man, Iremember the version of me who
was doing the shots and washaving a mimosa at 10 AM and I
(15:11):
was like heck, no, I'm nottouching that.
I put sparkling water with myorange juice.
Like I just don't love thefeeling anymore and it's crazy
where I've gotten to a pointthat I don't like any feeling of
being intoxicated at all,whether that be a THC seltzer or
whether that be alcohol.
Like the second, I feel likethe edge coming off of like me
being sharp.
(15:32):
I hate it and it's so wild.
But it was also super liberating.
Where I'm like, dude, I reallyhave outgrown alcohol and it's
no more.
It's no longer on the pedestaland I am still a freaking good
time without it and my anxietyis like I don't have any anxiety
and I don't know about you.
If you've ever had anxietyafter you drink, you're like did
(15:52):
I make a fool out of myself?
Oh, my gosh, like all of thatis completely gone because I
don't drink, because I don'tcare to drink, I don't want to
drink and I feel like life is sogood.
So why numb it?
Because when you numb some ofthe emotions, like frustration,
grief, sadness, anger you'realso numbing the good emotions,
(16:13):
like joy, like beautiful, sweetmoments with your kids and peace
.
You're also numbing peacebecause you numb it all.
It's not like, hey, alcohol,can you numb this sad thought
for me, but keep all the goodones.
It doesn't work like that.
And so, yeah, this was kind ofjust me sharing things on my
(16:35):
heart about such a freaking,epic trip.
Um, all the things that camefrom it, the beautiful
conversations, and I'd say thebiggest one is give yourself
peace, knowing that whateverdecision you make at any given
time on any given day is theright decision and exactly where
you're supposed to be, and thatit's gonna open more doors
because of every decision thatyou make, because you are
(16:57):
divinely supported and you'retotally loved and you're chosen
and all the good things arecoming your way that you make,
because you are divinelysupported and you're totally
loved and you're chosen and allthe good things are coming your
way.
I love you so much.
Thank you for being here onthis little like car ride chat
and hey, maybe I'll do more ofthese later, I don't know.
All right, catch you later.
Bye.
Thank you so much for tuninginto this episode of she is
(17:19):
Redefined.
If today's chat resonated withyou, don't forget to hit
subscribe so you never miss out.
Remember Bye, until next time.
Keep embracing who you are,because you're powerful, you're
capable and you are redefined.
Welcome to she is Redefined, the podcast where we
break free from societalexpectations, redefine our
identities and step fully intothe woman we were always meant
to be.
I'm Katie Smith, your host andguide on this journey of
transformation.
Here we're all about embracingchange, cultivating confidence
and living life on our own terms.
Each week, we'll dive intotopics that inspire, challenge
(00:22):
and empower you to redefine whatit means to be you.
Dive into topics that inspire,challenge and empower you to
redefine what it means to be you.
So if you're ready to rewriteyour story and live life that's
bold, authentic andunapologetically yours, let's
dive in.
Okay, not gonna lie, I amrecording this in my car with my
kids as they're playing gameson their little like tablet
(00:43):
thing, and so if you hear anoise in the background, you
might be hearing that right now,but that's why we are going to
roll with it, because I'mrunning errands, I bought one of
those fun little microphonethings, because I have a little
side project that I'm doing withhorses actually, where I need
like a microphone and like achest mount camera, all the
things.
If you are a horse girl, youstay tuned for that Cause it's
(01:06):
actually pretty cool and I havea whole separate like Facebook
group for it.
But I bought one of these funlittle microphones and I'm like,
wait a second, I can use thisin the car when I'm like have
some of my best thoughts and canjust like record faster.
Because that's what I'm allabout these days.
If you have been listening tome, you know that anything
(01:28):
performance feeling I'm notavailable for.
I'm available for alignment andflow and that's it.
First things first.
Because I said the wordalignment and flow, I have got
to brag about how epic of a tripit was to Newport Beach,
california a week ago.
We spent seven days at a beachhouse.
We were there last year at thesame beach house, but we were
(01:49):
only there for four days and theseven days it was literal magic
.
I can't express or find thewords to even share how magical
and in flow it was.
So I want to touch a little biton the conversations I had at
the beach house, kind of wherethings are at for me, and then
(02:11):
also how like magic can happenwhen you really surrender and
just let go of any kind ofoutcome or trying to control
anything.
Cause I really feel that thepast like three to four months,
I mean shoot, really feel thatthe past like three to four
months I mean, shoot, I thinkit's all of 2025 is God has been
teaching me the lesson of trustsurrender completely and trust.
(02:33):
The old Katie was one who wasvery calculated, Like that's how
I actually got as far as I didin corporate America.
I was a C-suite executive atthe age of 33 and very, very
calculated.
And this whole season of mylife, everything that has
happened with my horse and thenmy son, has really taught me
(02:54):
what self-trust is and supportfrom a higher being when you
just completely loosen yourhands off the reins.
If you're a horse girl, youknow what I'm talking about.
No more half halting, no moregrabbing the reins Like Jesus,
take the wheel status.
Okay, you feel me.
And so, over the beach house, um, I've just been looking so
forward to this, everything thathas happened with my son.
(03:15):
I just remember thinking thatwhen we go to the beach house,
it's going to be like we like areset, like we are so good,
we're here, we're together, likewe're going to live our best
lives, and so I just had thatattitude going into it.
And so we get there and my momhands me two pieces of mail and
I was like, oh okay, one thingabout me is I don't love opening
mail.
I don't really know why, but Iusually just like open it like a
(03:38):
day or two later after gettingit.
Well, my husband saw the mailon the table and he's like, hey,
you care if I open your mailfor you, I just want to see what
, what we got here.
And I was like, no, whatever,I'm going to go to the beach
with the boys, like have fun.
And my husband was going to meetsomeone else, uh, one of his
friends, who cause we used tolive in California, and he texts
me a picture and he goes um, soyou're gonna, you're just going
(04:01):
to laugh at this.
And I'm like what?
And he sends me a picture of acheck of $3,904 and like 21
cents or something.
And I just literally laughedbecause I'm like, of course, of
course this happened, of courseI open a check that's written to
(04:21):
me from guess from what?
This is what's going to haveyou trip out even more.
This was from my delivery withmy second son, who will be three
in literally two months, hewill be three years old where
they miscalculated things and Ihad a $3,900 credit that they
just, you know, wrote me thecheck.
Like I die, I can't even likemake this up.
(04:42):
So of course I'm like, yes, ofcourse that happens.
Now, is that abnormal for me?
Kind of, I'd actually have notopened like thousands of dollars
in the mail before.
I've opened like 1200 and 1500,but not like $4,000.
Like that was like a beautifullittle surprise, but I wasn't
(05:03):
surprised at all because of allthe releasing of any kind of
control I've been going through.
It's like it did make sensethat that happened to me,
because I've been in such thereceptive mode, because I
literally don't try to controlanything.
Okay, we're back.
I literally am at a Targetdrive up to get my order and so
I thought I'd do this on the go.
(05:24):
Anyways, so progressing, movingon into the week and the real
conversation that I want tounpack with you, that actually
happened with my two sisters.
So the week we just I just wasso like go with the flow, like I
didn't really have any plans.
I wanted to spend time at thebeach.
I literally was like, if youwant to see me, this is where
(05:46):
I'll be.
Come if you want, don't come ifyou don't want.
I literally was just like I'mdoing me.
I'm hanging out with my family,I'm trying to make this the
most present, memorable tripever.
And I did want to do a Duffyboat because I've missed Duffy
boats, and that was alreadyplanned.
(06:07):
We did that, but I was just sogo with the flow, free spirited,
this trip.
I literally got my hair wet andjumped in the ocean to the point
of my husband then goes.
So there's a public dock, so wego to this public part of the
Bay where you can post up andhang out or whatever, and then
there's like a little jumpingdock that they put to like I
would I don't know maybe 50yards off of the Bay front, that
(06:30):
you can swim to and jump off,and it's super fun.
And so you know, all the youngkids do that and whatnot.
And I jump in the water and getmy hair wet because the boys
like we're like, mommy, are yougoing to go swimming?
And instead of being like theKatie who was like no, I don't
want to get my hair wet, youknow, I was like absolutely,
I'll go swimming, and they got akick out of it.
(06:50):
They like me jumping in gettingmy hair wet.
They got an absolute kick outof it and it was like that's
what it's all about.
You know what I mean.
So then my husband goes I betyou won't swim to that, um, that
dock out there.
And I go, challenge accepted.
And so what do I do?
I swim my little booty all theway out to this dock, literally.
(07:12):
When I got there and thenturned around right, came right
back, right back, cause I didn'tlike go up it and to jump on it
or whatever, climb up on it tojump off.
I did not do that.
And when I was on my way back Iwas a little like he filmed me
and I was like you need to stopfilming, cause, like I'm
hyperventilating, like swimmingis so hard, especially when it's
cold.
Like no joke, I can admit that.
(07:32):
But when I got back, the boyswere like one of them was
actually upset, he was worriedabout me and I was my oldest.
He was like really worked upthat I swam that far and I'm
like don't you think I'm like acool mom?
Like come on.
And my husband was like dude,like that's awesome.
And I mean like who doesn'tlove their husband to feel like
proud of them, right?
Do you know what I mean Like?
So he was all like, yeah, thatwas awesome to the point where
(07:54):
then he wanted to do it and hewas like, okay, this is no joke.
So so it was just like so funand carefree.
Do you know what I mean?
You're probably picking up onwhat I'm laying down with that.
You're getting what I'm saying.
Well, a couple of days later, wego on the Duffy boat.
I even did something where Ibought a second Duffy boat,
which was something I've alwaysenvisioned doing.
I don't know why.
(08:15):
It was like two years ago,where I'm like I want to some
sometime on a trip.
I want to just buy a boat, renta boat for my family, have it
be my treat, cover the drinks,cover everything.
And the opportunity didn'tpresent itself last year, but
then this year it did throughmagic in the universe, and the
(08:35):
way it all fell into place waslike no other way than God
orchestrating it all.
But I was able to like Imanifested that where I was able
to pay for a Duffy boat andtreat everyone to such a fun
experience, when I know thatthat would be something that
normally would just be writtenoff, or like we're not going to
do that.
(08:56):
We have the beach house, that'senough.
And I'm like no, I want to feelelevated, I want to bring back
the memories of a Duffy boat,like it's so fun to see the Bay
from that, that view, thatvantage point on the water, and
so that was really cool.
And then, later that day, mysister, my younger sister, my
older sister, we were allchatting and, just for context,
I have an older sister, an olderbrother, me and then my younger
(09:18):
sister, and so we were allchatting about, like FOMO and
how, like, how do you make theright decision?
And I feel like I alwaysstruggle with this because it's
like I want to do this, but Iwant to do that and I can't make
a decision and I'm superindecisive.
Oh yeah, and my niece, jane,was there.
She's actually twin, anidentical twin.
Her and her boyfriend werethere and we were talking about
this because of college, and Ithen said something.
(09:41):
So, as matter of fact, which ismy own belief, which is I never
have FOMO anymore, when I wassomeone who literally, like FOMO
ran my life, and it's because Ibelieve whatever decision I
make is the right decision Letme say that again for it to land
for you I no longer live byFOMO, because I believe that
(10:01):
whatever decision I end up goingwith is the right decision and
where I'm meant to be.
When I said that it was like Idropped the mother freaking mic,
I'm not kidding.
Everybody was like whoa.
I think someone actually evengot chills by it, which was
crazy.
But it's honest to God, thetruth.
(10:21):
But I want to like unpack thata little bit with you because
it's given me so much peace inmy life and I think it comes
down to the fact of believingand knowing that I'm fully
supported by God, no matter what.
There's a reason I chose to goright instead of left.
There's a reason I decided togo to this party, not that party
(10:44):
.
There's a reason why I wasavailable to go hang out with
this person and not availableanymore to go hang out with that
person or whatever, like if Ihad a plan and somebody asked me
to do something but I wasalready busy, if you're
following me.
And there's a reason and it'sbecause I am divinely supported
and divinely protected.
I've lived through so much inthe past six to seven months
(11:08):
that like I feel like I've agedlike fricking five years, if I'm
being totally honest with you.
But because I've been throughso much.
I deeply believe that whateverdecision I make is where I'm
exactly meant to be, even if itwas such a hard decision.
And I have a rule.
If you're a private client ofmine, I have a rule.
When it comes down to things, Ionly need to be 51%, not 50, 50
(11:29):
, 51% and I'm good.
And I believe and I trust thateverything else works out for me
from that decision.
That's as simple as going tothe movie or not.
That's as simple as grabbingthat cup of coffee or not.
That's as simple as I'm goingto take this route home over
that route.
That's as simple as leaving thehouse five minutes earlier or
five minutes late.
It's all divine protection anddivine intervention.
(11:53):
I truly believe that to my core.
Living the game or living lifeplaying the game of FOMO like,
or living life playing the gameof FOMO like.
Did I make the right decision,waste so much of your time and
more of your energy and that'sall you have.
You only have energy and time.
Without that, you literally gotnothing.
(12:13):
And so it was so fun to havethat for my niece, who's just 21
, for her to be able to startliving her life with more trust
at that young of age.
Gosh, what I would do to goback to Katie at 21 and just
tell her chill out, girlfriend,relax.
When's the last time you took adeep breath, girl, like, if I
(12:34):
could go back I would, so that Ican tell Katie, 21-year-old
Katie, slow down, stop drinkingso much.
I know you're having fun, butis it the real fun?
Because really it.
Nothing is that important,nothing.
It's only the meaning that yougive it.
And then the last thing I wantto touch on, just because I
mentioned alcohol, was this timelast year was when I had the
(12:59):
first thought of not drinkinganymore.
I remember being on the beachwith my sister-in-law and my
nephews and my sons and they'rerunning around having fun and I
was like how, my third beer.
And I remember feeling buzzbecause I'm a lightweight.
And I remember being like whyam I doing this?
Like this is such a beautifulmoment.
(13:20):
I'm on the beach in sunnySouthern California with my
family, with my boys playingwhile they're young.
Like why am I?
Like trying to numb from thisjoy right now?
But that thought didn't totallystick.
It was the first thought thatlike, kind of was like you know,
it was like seated in my brain.
Thanks to God.
And then I remember thinkinglike what's the point of alcohol
(13:48):
?
And then I officially kind ofstopped drinking.
Although I don't have, I don'tbelieve in absolutes, so like do
.
Am I completely sober?
No, but I would say 99% of thetime I'm sober.
Like I bring my ownnon-alcoholic drinks everywhere,
I make my own mocktails, like Ihave a blast with this stuff.
And I did dabble in the THCseltzers for a hot second.
I don't love those, but I diddabble in that for a little bit.
(14:08):
That was just recently witheverything that went down with
my son.
I needed to find a way to relaxa little bit, along with
therapy and everything.
But it was so wild coming fullcircle where I was at the beach
again and I didn't have anyalcohol, maybe had a drink here,
never finished a single drink.
Um, my mom tried to make me adrink.
(14:28):
I ended up taking a couple ofsips and not even drinking it.
Like I'll say yes and I'll behonest with you.
Like I want to party.
There's parts of me that missesthat.
Like that sounds crazy,probably.
And you might be laughing at me, but literally I kept joking
the whole week Like I wish I wasfun still.
Now, of course I'm still fun,like I was.
I feel like I was the funnest ofthe people everyone because I
(14:50):
wasn't getting like buzzed oranything and I was like, yeah,
you guys want to do shots, I'llpour them for you, no problem,
you guys want to do this, youwant to have a dance party?
Like I am still fun, so don'ttake it out of context, but I
joke where it's like man, Iremember the version of me who
was doing the shots and washaving a mimosa at 10 AM and I
(15:11):
was like heck, no, I'm nottouching that.
I put sparkling water with myorange juice.
Like I just don't love thefeeling anymore and it's crazy
where I've gotten to a pointthat I don't like any feeling of
being intoxicated at all,whether that be a THC seltzer or
whether that be alcohol.
Like the second, I feel likethe edge coming off of like me
being sharp.
(15:32):
I hate it and it's so wild.
But it was also super liberating.
Where I'm like, dude, I reallyhave outgrown alcohol and it's
no more.
It's no longer on the pedestaland I am still a freaking good
time without it and my anxietyis like I don't have any anxiety
and I don't know about you.
If you've ever had anxietyafter you drink, you're like did
(15:52):
I make a fool out of myself?
Oh, my gosh, like all of thatis completely gone because I
don't drink, because I don'tcare to drink, I don't want to
drink and I feel like life is sogood.
So why numb it?
Because when you numb some ofthe emotions, like frustration,
grief, sadness, anger you'realso numbing the good emotions,
(16:13):
like joy, like beautiful, sweetmoments with your kids and peace
.
You're also numbing peacebecause you numb it all.
It's not like, hey, alcohol,can you numb this sad thought
for me, but keep all the goodones.
It doesn't work like that.
And so, yeah, this was kind ofjust me sharing things on my
(16:35):
heart about such a freaking,epic trip.
Um, all the things that camefrom it, the beautiful
conversations, and I'd say thebiggest one is give yourself
peace, knowing that whateverdecision you make at any given
time on any given day is theright decision and exactly where
you're supposed to be, and thatit's gonna open more doors
because of every decision thatyou make, because you are
(16:57):
divinely supported and you'retotally loved and you're chosen
and all the good things arecoming your way that you make,
because you are divinelysupported and you're totally
loved and you're chosen and allthe good things are coming your
way.
I love you so much.
Thank you for being here onthis little like car ride chat
and hey, maybe I'll do more ofthese later, I don't know.
All right, catch you later.
Bye.
Thank you so much for tuninginto this episode of she is
(17:19):
Redefined.
If today's chat resonated withyou, don't forget to hit
subscribe so you never miss out.
Remember Bye, until next time.
Keep embracing who you are,because you're powerful, you're
capable and you are redefined.
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