🎙️ Say No to People Pleasing & Yes to You!

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Ever wonder why a stranger's approval often feels more valuable than our own self-acceptance? This thought-provoking episode explores our collective obsession with external validation and the exhausting mathematics of people-pleasing.

We dive into the dangerous equation many of us follow: dividing ourselves into smaller and smaller pieces to meet others' expectations until we're stretched impossibly thin, serving no one well – especially not ourselves. I explore how we've become masters of relationship politics, pretending everything's fine when it isn't, then feeling frustrated when nobody notices our unspoken distress. This growing gap between our authentic selves and our public personas creates a mathematical impossibility – trying to be everything to everybody simply doesn't add up.

But there's profound freedom in recognizing yourself as the only common denominator in your life – the prime number that cannot be divided. Consider this: of the 7+ billion people on Earth, most will never know you existed, and of those who do, how many truly know the authentic you? When we shift focus from external approval to internal alignment, we discover that what matters isn't universal acceptance but personal integrity. Yes, standing in your truth means some people won't like what you have to say – and that's perfectly okay. The journey will be messy and imperfect, but gloriously yours. By showing up authentically, you not only reclaim your power but create space for others to do the same. Isn't that a much more fulfilling way to contribute to the world than endless people-pleasing?

What might change in your life if you stopped seeking validation from others and started honoring your inherent worth? I'd love to hear your thoughts – share your experiences or reflections in the comments, and if this message resonated with you, please subscribe and share with someone who might need to hear it.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
I often wonder why we so often place more value on
what others think of us than howwe think about ourselves.
How is it that we believe thatif someone else likes us or what
we do or say, then we must beokay?
In a world where likes are abarometer for whether or not we
are showing up in an acceptableway, we try to please, attract

(00:24):
and impress as many people as wecan and then live in fear that
someone won't approve or respondin the way we had hoped or
expected them to.
We've gotten so good atdividing ourselves into smaller
and smaller pieces that we endup stretched thin, pleasing no
one with an empty tank.
We compound things further byplaying relationship politics,

(00:50):
often pretending we are okaywhen we're not, and then getting
really frustrated or even angrywhen no one notices how we feel
.
We've all been there, but atwhat point did we start to lose
our ability to tap into how wefactor into the equation and

(01:10):
instead multiply the distancebetween who we really are and
how we are showing up?
Do the math it doesn't add up.
We can't be everything toeverybody, but we can be
everything to ourselves.
In fact, we are the only commondenominator, the prime number.
Whether we feel like it or not,we are in control.

(01:32):
I know that it seems easiersometimes to go with the flow
than to share our own thoughtsor ideas or to ask for what we
want or need, but I promise you,relying on others to define our
worth is a zero-sum game.
Never, ever, underestimate howvaluable you truly are.

(01:54):
There are more than 7 billionpeople in the world, most of
whom will never know you everexisted, and of the ones that do
, how many really know you whenyou emanate from who you truly
are?
It isn't important thateveryone agrees or likes what
you say or do.
The important thing is that itmatters to you.

(02:18):
Everyone will not always likewhat you have to say, and that's
okay, and if they do, thenthat's great too.
Either way, you are not definedby the way that they want or
expect you to be anymore.
It'll be messy and imperfect,but it'll be yours.
Life is way too short to tryand please everyone.

(02:40):
The best way you can contributeto the world is by showing up
for yourself and by saying whatyou need to say, you give
permission to others to do thesame.
I'm Lisa Hopkins.

(03:02):
Thanks for listening.
Stay safe and healthy, everyone, and remember to live in the
moment.