April 15, 2025 • 26 mins
We share a simple, hard path for becoming the man your wife wants to draw close to stop fixing, start listening, and build trust through small, steady acts. Stories from the scripture, and practical steps help you earn permission to love well and lead with faith.
• Letting go of trying to improve your wife
• Active listening that seeks feelings and needs
• Taming anger by earning the right to influence
• Practicing daily appreciation with words and notes
• Keeping promises to create emotional safety
• Repairing with apology and follow-through
• Championing her dreams with a “dream date”
• Growing together through shared faith and purpose
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_00 (00:01):
What kind of father do you want to be?
What kind of man do you want tobecome for your family and for
yourself?
If you've ever wondered how tostep into the fullness of your
role as a father, husband, andman of God, then you're in the
right place.
Here at the Father Difference,our mission is to inspire and
equip men to be the best fathersthey can be.
(00:23):
It's a powerful mission.
And today, we're going toexplore exactly how you can take
steps toward that calling.
Whether you're a father, a son,a husband, grandfather, single
dad, stepfather, or just lookingto grow, I believe God has
something powerful for you intoday's message.
(00:43):
Whether you're tuning in live orwatching this later, we are so
excited to have you here.
If this is what you're lookingfor, then subscribe so you can
tune in each week to the FatherDifference Live.
You can sign up below.
And now your host, a husband,father, grandfather, author, and
(01:04):
former NFL player, Pastor EdMcGlass.
SPEAKER_01 (01:17):
I am broadcasting from High in the Mountains of
Switzerland.
I'm here seeing Mary, my beloveddaughter and Tim, her husband,
my five grandkids.
It's been an epic, uh, wonderfultime.
They took me up, took us up to alittle tiny grotto restaurant
(01:40):
high in the mountains, just overhanging a gigantic cavern, a
little Italian restaurant with achef that was my size, and he
cooked us an unbelievable meal.
And uh so grateful to that.
And today, tonight, it'sactually nighttime here.
(02:01):
It's um late in the night inSwitzerland and broadcasting to
you.
I want to talk to you about uhthe whole subject of becoming
the man you can't resist.
How many want to be that guy?
I know I do.
I don't like being in trouble.
And one of the things thatprobably one of the most
(02:25):
important steps to take inreally reinvigorating your
passion with your wife and andher heart is number one, you
gotta be willing to let go oftrying to improve your wife.
Repeat after me, I can't changethe woman that I love, no matter
(02:54):
how smart I think I am.
And as a matter of fact, I havenine granddaughters who at some
point in our early relationshiphas said to me directly, you are
not the boss of me.
Taught me so much about theheart of a girl and the heart of
(03:17):
my wife.
And so part of being a lovinghusband, becoming the kind of
husband she can resist isletting go of your attempts to
try to improve your wife's lifethrough your perfect plan for
her.
You know what I mean?
(03:38):
Ever get stuck in doing that.
I'm gonna share with you fivequick things to just think
about.
Because maybe I'm the only onewho makes this mistake, but I'm
always trying to help my mywife, help my grandkids, help my
daughters.
And I've learned one thing thatif if I don't have permission
into their heart to help with ananswer, then that answer most
(04:04):
often will cause them to be hurtby me.
You ever make that mistake andpromise you never do it again,
and you're irresistible becauseyou're a guy and you want to
help the situation?
Well, let me tell you, itdoesn't work.
Trust me, from a grandpa and ahusband of many, many moons, it
(04:28):
doesn't work.
Okay, let's get right into it.
So, number one, how can I becomethe man she can resist?
Because I want my wife to notspend all of her time working on
me, and one of the ways of doingthat is to not work on her.
Somebody say amen.
See, you guys are tuning in fromall over the country and outside
(04:50):
the country.
I'm so grateful that you'rewatching tonight.
And I'm praying for you in yourmarriage because there's
probably nothing more importantright now than for men like us
to love the woman that God'sgiven us in such a way that it
opens her heart to not onlyrespond to us, but to be the
(05:11):
wife that we really uh alwayswanted to have.
We we gotta have a plate forthat.
So, how to become the man shecan resist.
Now, on the onset, I want to saythat it's not it's not about you
becoming more sexy or more fit.
Well, that has a benefit mostlyto you looking at yourself in
(05:33):
the mirror.
But what she wants to know iswhat's deep in your heart and
what you really think about her.
And so here's number one youwant to open her heart, listen
actively.
And what that means is you gottatruly hear her words, her
emotions, her needs withoutinterrupting or assuming.
(05:54):
And the only way I can stay inthis place, I have to stay in
this place of asking, how can Isupport you today?
How can I because if I do thatand I ask her that, it shows her
val that I value herperspective, which is way more
important to her than you justbeing romantic.
(06:15):
And romance is a big part of it.
These are like the precursors tosetting the stage for a romance
for a lifetime.
How can I support you today?
And then to show her that youvalue her perspective and and do
what she says, and you get theseregular check-ins which helped
what build trust andunderstanding.
(06:36):
Well, here's a verse here says,My dear brothers and sisters,
take note of this.
Everyone should be quick tolisten, slow to speak, and maybe
slower to become angry.
And yet I was with a young dadtoday here in Switzerland, and
(06:57):
and he was like, Man, how can Istop being so angry at at my
kids and my wife?
And I said, What makes youangry?
He says, Well, they they don'talways do what I tell them.
Well, you know, you gotta yougotta earn the right of of
telling them things by lovingthem in such a way that they
(07:23):
they really believe in the coreof their own heart that you
think they're smart enough tolive the life that they have.
So you don't just need to be therescuer all the time.
Our job is to be in that placewhere we help them discover the
best truths to live by, and thenwe support them like it was
(07:45):
their idea.
How do I know that works?
Well, that's exactly what mywife does to me.
And it works.
And see, when I'm listening andI'm patiently reflecting God's
call, right, to to understandher, to strengthen her, that
really changes everything in ourrelationship.
(08:06):
So we listen actively.
Here's another one showconsistent appreciation.
How demanding are you with youryour wife?
And think about just for amoment the early days when you
were dating.
How much time did you point outwhat was broken in her life?
(08:28):
Or did you do what we all doreally well when we're trying to
catch somebody, and that is toconstantly appreciating them,
just pointing out everythingthat you love about them, not
just for her actions, but forwho she is.
You're you're just saying, Iadmire this about you, and
(08:49):
little small gestures like aheartfelt note.
You know, notes are have been apowerful tool in my family with
all my daughters and mygranddaughters, and especially
my wife, and I write and putinto words the things that I
really love and appreciate abouther, and then I put it on her
mirror or leave a note behind.
(09:10):
Those things are just they'regolden for connecting.
See, romance with a girl happenswhen her heart is opened by our
pursuit, and the more we pursuethem and they feel that this guy
gets me, the more we become theman of her dreams, and it makes
(09:33):
her feel cherished and she feelsappreciated.
Because think about the way yourwife was raised, and you know,
you probably have a wife like Idid, where you know, in her
early days of being a girl, herdad didn't quite know how to
appreciate her and love her anduh and appropriately uh show her
(09:54):
affection, so her sense ofconfidence comes out of that
moment.
See, I never knew in the earlydays that the way I love my
daughters would affect the waythey see the first man of their
story.
And uh and so that's a paraphernfor your daughters and for your
(10:17):
your wife.
As a matter of fact, if you gota wayward daughter right now,
how are you showing uh affectionand appreciation for her?
Or are you waiting until sheobeys?
Well, I gotta tell you, untilyou get her heart, you won't
have her mind.
Gotta win her heart first.
Here's the next slide.
(10:39):
And so here's a verse inEphesians that says, Don't let
any unwholesome talk come out ofyour mouth.
How many have said some thingsto your wife or to your
daughters that you wish youcould get back in there?
But only what is helpful forbuilding others up according to
their deeds, that they maybenefit those who listen.
(11:00):
You know, I've learned somethingthat's you know, yeah, you learn
that lesson like 50 times, andthen you finally get it.
And that is I can only really dowith my wife and my children
those things that God is alreadydoing in their hearts.
See, that's the differencebetween a religious system where
(11:22):
we obey a set of rules to getin, and Christianity in its
truest form, where Jesus did thework for us.
And the more we declare that wecan't do it without him, and the
more we receive from him, themore we become like him.
Powerful, powerful lesson.
(11:42):
And so when we're we honor themwith our words and we celebrate
the things that we see, it's thesame way that happens to us when
we connect to the Lord.
Here's number three be reliableand trustworthy.
(12:04):
This might seem like a given,but keep your promises from the
small tasks to the big ones.
You know, consistency createsthis security emotionally around
the people in your life.
If if you're it's like this, howmany of you have ever been next
to a train that's coming by andthere's a train track and you
(12:26):
see a train that you want to getclose?
Why?
Well, you know that that train'son a track.
It's consistent, it's reliable.
And if the can somebody said thetrain is flown off the track and
it's going in a milliondirections, what are you going
to do?
Well, you're going to run foryour life.
Well, that's the same way whenwe don't build these solid
(12:48):
emotional tracks in the life ofour kids.
They don't want to get close tous because we're unpredictable.
And so being reliable andtrustworthy is like a train.
And it's coming, but you standclose because you know you're
not going to get hit becauseit's going to stay on the track.
That's what consistency does.
(13:10):
And the best thing you can do isyou promise something, keep it,
even from small tasks tocommitments.
Consistency creates thatemotional security for your kids
and your wife.
If you falter, here's the greatone.
If you break, you blow it, youapologize, ask for forgiveness,
be sincere about it, and make itright.
(13:33):
And you know, over and overagain, I I've blown it, and then
I said, forgive me for this.
And then you sort of make it up.
And it's it's a powerful lesson.
And your daughters will do willrespond to you this way, and
your wife will.
It's never too late to do that.
See, simply, simply let your yesbe yes, the Bible says, and your
(13:58):
no be no.
Anything beyond that comes fromthe evil one.
And you've met people all thetime who go, Yeah, man, I'll do
this thing.
Never do it.
Well, we got to be that person.
So when you say yes, you'recreating this foundation of
trust in your family.
And the more you follow throughon your yeses, the more the
(14:21):
heart of your wife will open andyou will become the man of her
dreams.
See, being dependable mirrorsGod's faithfulness, fostering a
safe and reliable marriage.
And that is so true.
And finally, you want I justwant to encourage you to support
her dreams, champion her goals,whether they are about a career,
(14:42):
hobbies, personal growth, youknow, help practically give her
time, do some chores for heremotionally.
And so I want to encourage youto do a a little exercise and
and go on a dream date.
And you know, take your wife outsomewhere that that you both
(15:03):
love and sit on the same side ofthe booth.
I remember when we first didthis, we were at Ruth Christ,
and I said, Hey, let's do adream date.
She goes, What's that?
I said, Let's talk about wherewe want to be together as a
couple in five years, ten years,twenty years.
And so immediately we started toto share about our dreams and
(15:30):
goals.
And and Jill in the beginningstarted talking about some of
the things she wished that Iwould change.
And I looked at her and I said,Can we just talk about dreams?
Because we're we go out all thetime and talk about what's
broken, but we don't talk enoughabout what we love about each
other.
(15:50):
And she goes, Well, you first.
And so I I talked about fiveyears, ten years, twenty years,
and she just leaned in, satcloser.
And and then when she shared, Ilearned all these things about
my wife, about her dreams that Inever really knew.
So, what are the dreams of yourwife?
(16:12):
I mean, think about the placesshe wants to go, the things she
wants to have, the children,relationship with her kids.
So many girls, you they get allin with their husband, and our
life in our marriage becomesabout making a living,
surviving, staying together, butwe don't flourish because we
(16:38):
don't build our dream into ourmarriages.
I can't tell you how many timesI've begun to coach couples and
spouses will say, Well, I had togive up my dream to be married
to you.
Wow, what a what a painful thingto hear.
(16:59):
And so there there wasn't a lotof conversation.
So I said, Well, why don't weyou guys start talking about
where you want to be in five,ten, twenty years together?
Well, it's not here.
And once we began to talk aboutit with this exercise, the the
wives began to just starting tobe unlocked, and and the husband
(17:21):
began to listen and hear, and acouple of times the husband came
to me, you know, the next dayand called me up and said, you
know, I know more about my wifetoday than I did 15 year old
years ago when I got married.
Thank you so much for thatexercise.
And so what it's all about istalking about your dream, and
(17:43):
everything goes.
And and because if you don'tnurture where you think you're
going together and support oneanother, then you're gonna end
up just surviving being acouple.
It's not enough.
God wants you to serve not onlysurvive of being a couple, but
to have a romance over alifetime.
(18:07):
And kind of finally, and notlast last but not least, is I
want to just encourage you to isto just uh what Ecclesiastes
says, you know, stay committedto growing together.
(18:28):
You know, through though one maybe overpowered, two can defend
themselves.
The cord of three strands is notquickly broken.
And a marriage rooted in ashared purpose and faith grows
stronger with God's strength.
And I'm gonna tell you, my wifeis the mama bear that protects
me more than any other person inmy life.
(18:50):
And I'm so grateful for herbecause I couldn't do what God's
given me to do without her, andshe can't do what God's given
her to do without me in herlife.
And when we come together andwe're rooted in that shared
purpose, we get strongertogether and love one another in
ways that we never thought we wecould.
(19:12):
And so the next step is that ifyou've not uh discovered my
series, How to Become theHusband and Father Your Family
Needs, you can go to our websiteright now and you can check it
out.
And I'd love for you to learnabout what we're doing, and
because we we've uh built thisfatherhood academy that really
(19:37):
is designed to help every singleman, and we have many wives
involved in these courses aswell, who are live coaching or
podcasts and more to really helpyou become everything that God
has made you to be.
And I'm so grateful that uhyou're you're here tonight and
on April the the 15th, and and Ican t I can tell you that uh one
(20:05):
of the greatest joys of my lifeis being able to share with you
and coach and be a part of yourstories.
But at the same time, what evena greater joy for me is having a
wife who still loves me, adoresme, and wants to hang out with
me.
It can happen.
(20:26):
And you would especially say menafter watching me in my early
days of trying to be a husband.
I had no clue.
But the good news is if yourheart gets connected to Jesus,
his father will teach you how tobe the husband you need to be
and the father you need to be.
And what a grand thing that'sall about.
(20:49):
So before we get off tonight, Iwant to pray with you.
If you send in your prayerrequests, you can send them in
to me at thefatherdifference.com, our
website, and uh would love torespond to you.
We could even set up a coachingtime and uh to help you in your
story.
(21:09):
But before we get off, I want topray with you tonight.
God, I'm just so grateful for mybrothers that are watching.
I'm thankful for them, Lord, andI know that of n a number of you
are in the biggest challenge ofyour life with your wife and
your family.
And you wanna you want it to bedifferent.
(21:31):
And so, Lord, I pray that youwould um open their hearts
tonight, that you speak deeplyinto them and show them that the
more that they are fathered byyou, the more impact you're
gonna make with their wives andtheir children and their
grandchildren one day.
Lord, I'm so grateful that uhyou took this broken football
player and taught him how to bea husband.
(21:55):
And he taught me how to be afather and a and uh now a
grandfather.
And I pray for every familythere that's watching, and I
pray you would do somethingprofound in them, Lord, just
like you have done for me andthousands of others have gone
through our courses, and thatthey have encountered you in in
a brand new way and have changedaway their fathers, and a change
(22:18):
away their husbands, and they'verecaptured the heart of their
wife and become the man of theirdreams, and they become the
father that their kids brag totheir friends about.
And I pray you would bless themin the name of the Father, Son,
and Holy Spirit in Jesus' name.
Amen.
So great to be with you.
It's Holy Week.
(22:40):
You'll get some specialdevotionals from me.
If you've not already signed up,you can sign up for that as well
every day.
I have a free devotion.
You can go to our website, anduh and and we're going through
Holy Week and all these amazingthings that Jesus did on the
cross.
Would love to send that to youas well.
(23:01):
And all that to say, I have alittle outro video to play, but
I'm so grateful that you'rehere.
And so this is Ed McGlassensigning off from high in the
mountains in Switzerland.
Rained the last two days, and sograteful to be here with my
grandkids and uh love them somuch.
(23:22):
God bless you.
SPEAKER_00 (23:26):
Dear friends, imagine a world where every
father feels equipped to leadwith faith, love, and purpose.
A world where families thriveand communities grow stronger
because of devoted,Christ-centered fathers.
SPEAKER_01 (23:41):
You know, beloved, that is the vision that God's
put in my heart for every singlefamily.
You know, he is on the move, Ibelieve.
He promises in Malachi thatbefore the great and coming day
of the Lord, he's gonna dosomething profound.
He's gonna turn the hearts offathers back towards their
(24:03):
children.
So the hearts of their childrenwill turn back to their father.
That's what God is doing.
I mean dads daily who want tolearn to be better fathers.
Yet many have never been shownhow.
Too many families are beingfractured to bitterness and with
parents and grandparents evenbeing canceled.
(24:25):
That's why we're launching anonline community to quit and to
be the fathers that God iscalled to be.
It's more than a program, it's apart of a movement that God is
already doing to reshapefatherhood.
It's a sacred calling rooted inthe teachings of pride.
(24:46):
And we're calling this theFatherhood Academy, where men
will embark on a journey ofhealing and spiritual
restoration that helps themtransform their family
relationship.
And to make this vision areality, would you consider
partnering with us financiallyif we continue to reach and
(25:10):
disciple every man, dad, andgrandpa that comes our way?
Your donation will help create aripple across the neighborhoods,
communities, you know, notfamiliar nature, anchoring each
job, your division in theunwavering love and guidance of
(25:30):
a devoted dad.
SPEAKER_00 (25:31):
Will you partner with us?
Your gift, whether a one-timedonation or ongoing monthly
support, will help to transformlives.
Together, we can equip fathersand grandfathers to lead with
faith and create a brighter,hopeful future for generations
(25:51):
to come.
Click the link to donate today.
Thank you for believing in thismission and joining us on this
transformative journey.
What kind of father do you want to be?
What kind of man do you want tobecome for your family and for
yourself?
If you've ever wondered how tostep into the fullness of your
role as a father, husband, andman of God, then you're in the
right place.
Here at the Father Difference,our mission is to inspire and
equip men to be the best fathersthey can be.
(00:23):
It's a powerful mission.
And today, we're going toexplore exactly how you can take
steps toward that calling.
Whether you're a father, a son,a husband, grandfather, single
dad, stepfather, or just lookingto grow, I believe God has
something powerful for you intoday's message.
(00:43):
Whether you're tuning in live orwatching this later, we are so
excited to have you here.
If this is what you're lookingfor, then subscribe so you can
tune in each week to the FatherDifference Live.
You can sign up below.
And now your host, a husband,father, grandfather, author, and
(01:04):
former NFL player, Pastor EdMcGlass.
SPEAKER_01 (01:17):
I am broadcasting from High in the Mountains of
Switzerland.
I'm here seeing Mary, my beloveddaughter and Tim, her husband,
my five grandkids.
It's been an epic, uh, wonderfultime.
They took me up, took us up to alittle tiny grotto restaurant
(01:40):
high in the mountains, just overhanging a gigantic cavern, a
little Italian restaurant with achef that was my size, and he
cooked us an unbelievable meal.
And uh so grateful to that.
And today, tonight, it'sactually nighttime here.
(02:01):
It's um late in the night inSwitzerland and broadcasting to
you.
I want to talk to you about uhthe whole subject of becoming
the man you can't resist.
How many want to be that guy?
I know I do.
I don't like being in trouble.
And one of the things thatprobably one of the most
(02:25):
important steps to take inreally reinvigorating your
passion with your wife and andher heart is number one, you
gotta be willing to let go oftrying to improve your wife.
Repeat after me, I can't changethe woman that I love, no matter
(02:54):
how smart I think I am.
And as a matter of fact, I havenine granddaughters who at some
point in our early relationshiphas said to me directly, you are
not the boss of me.
Taught me so much about theheart of a girl and the heart of
(03:17):
my wife.
And so part of being a lovinghusband, becoming the kind of
husband she can resist isletting go of your attempts to
try to improve your wife's lifethrough your perfect plan for
her.
You know what I mean?
(03:38):
Ever get stuck in doing that.
I'm gonna share with you fivequick things to just think
about.
Because maybe I'm the only onewho makes this mistake, but I'm
always trying to help my mywife, help my grandkids, help my
daughters.
And I've learned one thing thatif if I don't have permission
into their heart to help with ananswer, then that answer most
(04:04):
often will cause them to be hurtby me.
You ever make that mistake andpromise you never do it again,
and you're irresistible becauseyou're a guy and you want to
help the situation?
Well, let me tell you, itdoesn't work.
Trust me, from a grandpa and ahusband of many, many moons, it
(04:28):
doesn't work.
Okay, let's get right into it.
So, number one, how can I becomethe man she can resist?
Because I want my wife to notspend all of her time working on
me, and one of the ways of doingthat is to not work on her.
Somebody say amen.
See, you guys are tuning in fromall over the country and outside
(04:50):
the country.
I'm so grateful that you'rewatching tonight.
And I'm praying for you in yourmarriage because there's
probably nothing more importantright now than for men like us
to love the woman that God'sgiven us in such a way that it
opens her heart to not onlyrespond to us, but to be the
(05:11):
wife that we really uh alwayswanted to have.
We we gotta have a plate forthat.
So, how to become the man shecan resist.
Now, on the onset, I want to saythat it's not it's not about you
becoming more sexy or more fit.
Well, that has a benefit mostlyto you looking at yourself in
(05:33):
the mirror.
But what she wants to know iswhat's deep in your heart and
what you really think about her.
And so here's number one youwant to open her heart, listen
actively.
And what that means is you gottatruly hear her words, her
emotions, her needs withoutinterrupting or assuming.
(05:54):
And the only way I can stay inthis place, I have to stay in
this place of asking, how can Isupport you today?
How can I because if I do thatand I ask her that, it shows her
val that I value herperspective, which is way more
important to her than you justbeing romantic.
(06:15):
And romance is a big part of it.
These are like the precursors tosetting the stage for a romance
for a lifetime.
How can I support you today?
And then to show her that youvalue her perspective and and do
what she says, and you get theseregular check-ins which helped
what build trust andunderstanding.
(06:36):
Well, here's a verse here says,My dear brothers and sisters,
take note of this.
Everyone should be quick tolisten, slow to speak, and maybe
slower to become angry.
And yet I was with a young dadtoday here in Switzerland, and
(06:57):
and he was like, Man, how can Istop being so angry at at my
kids and my wife?
And I said, What makes youangry?
He says, Well, they they don'talways do what I tell them.
Well, you know, you gotta yougotta earn the right of of
telling them things by lovingthem in such a way that they
(07:23):
they really believe in the coreof their own heart that you
think they're smart enough tolive the life that they have.
So you don't just need to be therescuer all the time.
Our job is to be in that placewhere we help them discover the
best truths to live by, and thenwe support them like it was
(07:45):
their idea.
How do I know that works?
Well, that's exactly what mywife does to me.
And it works.
And see, when I'm listening andI'm patiently reflecting God's
call, right, to to understandher, to strengthen her, that
really changes everything in ourrelationship.
(08:06):
So we listen actively.
Here's another one showconsistent appreciation.
How demanding are you with youryour wife?
And think about just for amoment the early days when you
were dating.
How much time did you point outwhat was broken in her life?
(08:28):
Or did you do what we all doreally well when we're trying to
catch somebody, and that is toconstantly appreciating them,
just pointing out everythingthat you love about them, not
just for her actions, but forwho she is.
You're you're just saying, Iadmire this about you, and
(08:49):
little small gestures like aheartfelt note.
You know, notes are have been apowerful tool in my family with
all my daughters and mygranddaughters, and especially
my wife, and I write and putinto words the things that I
really love and appreciate abouther, and then I put it on her
mirror or leave a note behind.
(09:10):
Those things are just they'regolden for connecting.
See, romance with a girl happenswhen her heart is opened by our
pursuit, and the more we pursuethem and they feel that this guy
gets me, the more we become theman of her dreams, and it makes
(09:33):
her feel cherished and she feelsappreciated.
Because think about the way yourwife was raised, and you know,
you probably have a wife like Idid, where you know, in her
early days of being a girl, herdad didn't quite know how to
appreciate her and love her anduh and appropriately uh show her
(09:54):
affection, so her sense ofconfidence comes out of that
moment.
See, I never knew in the earlydays that the way I love my
daughters would affect the waythey see the first man of their
story.
And uh and so that's a paraphernfor your daughters and for your
(10:17):
your wife.
As a matter of fact, if you gota wayward daughter right now,
how are you showing uh affectionand appreciation for her?
Or are you waiting until sheobeys?
Well, I gotta tell you, untilyou get her heart, you won't
have her mind.
Gotta win her heart first.
Here's the next slide.
(10:39):
And so here's a verse inEphesians that says, Don't let
any unwholesome talk come out ofyour mouth.
How many have said some thingsto your wife or to your
daughters that you wish youcould get back in there?
But only what is helpful forbuilding others up according to
their deeds, that they maybenefit those who listen.
(11:00):
You know, I've learned somethingthat's you know, yeah, you learn
that lesson like 50 times, andthen you finally get it.
And that is I can only really dowith my wife and my children
those things that God is alreadydoing in their hearts.
See, that's the differencebetween a religious system where
(11:22):
we obey a set of rules to getin, and Christianity in its
truest form, where Jesus did thework for us.
And the more we declare that wecan't do it without him, and the
more we receive from him, themore we become like him.
Powerful, powerful lesson.
(11:42):
And so when we're we honor themwith our words and we celebrate
the things that we see, it's thesame way that happens to us when
we connect to the Lord.
Here's number three be reliableand trustworthy.
(12:04):
This might seem like a given,but keep your promises from the
small tasks to the big ones.
You know, consistency createsthis security emotionally around
the people in your life.
If if you're it's like this, howmany of you have ever been next
to a train that's coming by andthere's a train track and you
(12:26):
see a train that you want to getclose?
Why?
Well, you know that that train'son a track.
It's consistent, it's reliable.
And if the can somebody said thetrain is flown off the track and
it's going in a milliondirections, what are you going
to do?
Well, you're going to run foryour life.
Well, that's the same way whenwe don't build these solid
(12:48):
emotional tracks in the life ofour kids.
They don't want to get close tous because we're unpredictable.
And so being reliable andtrustworthy is like a train.
And it's coming, but you standclose because you know you're
not going to get hit becauseit's going to stay on the track.
That's what consistency does.
(13:10):
And the best thing you can do isyou promise something, keep it,
even from small tasks tocommitments.
Consistency creates thatemotional security for your kids
and your wife.
If you falter, here's the greatone.
If you break, you blow it, youapologize, ask for forgiveness,
be sincere about it, and make itright.
(13:33):
And you know, over and overagain, I I've blown it, and then
I said, forgive me for this.
And then you sort of make it up.
And it's it's a powerful lesson.
And your daughters will do willrespond to you this way, and
your wife will.
It's never too late to do that.
See, simply, simply let your yesbe yes, the Bible says, and your
(13:58):
no be no.
Anything beyond that comes fromthe evil one.
And you've met people all thetime who go, Yeah, man, I'll do
this thing.
Never do it.
Well, we got to be that person.
So when you say yes, you'recreating this foundation of
trust in your family.
And the more you follow throughon your yeses, the more the
(14:21):
heart of your wife will open andyou will become the man of her
dreams.
See, being dependable mirrorsGod's faithfulness, fostering a
safe and reliable marriage.
And that is so true.
And finally, you want I justwant to encourage you to support
her dreams, champion her goals,whether they are about a career,
(14:42):
hobbies, personal growth, youknow, help practically give her
time, do some chores for heremotionally.
And so I want to encourage youto do a a little exercise and
and go on a dream date.
And you know, take your wife outsomewhere that that you both
(15:03):
love and sit on the same side ofthe booth.
I remember when we first didthis, we were at Ruth Christ,
and I said, Hey, let's do adream date.
She goes, What's that?
I said, Let's talk about wherewe want to be together as a
couple in five years, ten years,twenty years.
And so immediately we started toto share about our dreams and
(15:30):
goals.
And and Jill in the beginningstarted talking about some of
the things she wished that Iwould change.
And I looked at her and I said,Can we just talk about dreams?
Because we're we go out all thetime and talk about what's
broken, but we don't talk enoughabout what we love about each
other.
(15:50):
And she goes, Well, you first.
And so I I talked about fiveyears, ten years, twenty years,
and she just leaned in, satcloser.
And and then when she shared, Ilearned all these things about
my wife, about her dreams that Inever really knew.
So, what are the dreams of yourwife?
(16:12):
I mean, think about the placesshe wants to go, the things she
wants to have, the children,relationship with her kids.
So many girls, you they get allin with their husband, and our
life in our marriage becomesabout making a living,
surviving, staying together, butwe don't flourish because we
(16:38):
don't build our dream into ourmarriages.
I can't tell you how many timesI've begun to coach couples and
spouses will say, Well, I had togive up my dream to be married
to you.
Wow, what a what a painful thingto hear.
(16:59):
And so there there wasn't a lotof conversation.
So I said, Well, why don't weyou guys start talking about
where you want to be in five,ten, twenty years together?
Well, it's not here.
And once we began to talk aboutit with this exercise, the the
wives began to just starting tobe unlocked, and and the husband
(17:21):
began to listen and hear, and acouple of times the husband came
to me, you know, the next dayand called me up and said, you
know, I know more about my wifetoday than I did 15 year old
years ago when I got married.
Thank you so much for thatexercise.
And so what it's all about istalking about your dream, and
(17:43):
everything goes.
And and because if you don'tnurture where you think you're
going together and support oneanother, then you're gonna end
up just surviving being acouple.
It's not enough.
God wants you to serve not onlysurvive of being a couple, but
to have a romance over alifetime.
(18:07):
And kind of finally, and notlast last but not least, is I
want to just encourage you to isto just uh what Ecclesiastes
says, you know, stay committedto growing together.
(18:28):
You know, through though one maybe overpowered, two can defend
themselves.
The cord of three strands is notquickly broken.
And a marriage rooted in ashared purpose and faith grows
stronger with God's strength.
And I'm gonna tell you, my wifeis the mama bear that protects
me more than any other person inmy life.
(18:50):
And I'm so grateful for herbecause I couldn't do what God's
given me to do without her, andshe can't do what God's given
her to do without me in herlife.
And when we come together andwe're rooted in that shared
purpose, we get strongertogether and love one another in
ways that we never thought we wecould.
(19:12):
And so the next step is that ifyou've not uh discovered my
series, How to Become theHusband and Father Your Family
Needs, you can go to our websiteright now and you can check it
out.
And I'd love for you to learnabout what we're doing, and
because we we've uh built thisfatherhood academy that really
(19:37):
is designed to help every singleman, and we have many wives
involved in these courses aswell, who are live coaching or
podcasts and more to really helpyou become everything that God
has made you to be.
And I'm so grateful that uhyou're you're here tonight and
on April the the 15th, and and Ican t I can tell you that uh one
(20:05):
of the greatest joys of my lifeis being able to share with you
and coach and be a part of yourstories.
But at the same time, what evena greater joy for me is having a
wife who still loves me, adoresme, and wants to hang out with
me.
It can happen.
(20:26):
And you would especially say menafter watching me in my early
days of trying to be a husband.
I had no clue.
But the good news is if yourheart gets connected to Jesus,
his father will teach you how tobe the husband you need to be
and the father you need to be.
And what a grand thing that'sall about.
(20:49):
So before we get off tonight, Iwant to pray with you.
If you send in your prayerrequests, you can send them in
to me at thefatherdifference.com, our
website, and uh would love torespond to you.
We could even set up a coachingtime and uh to help you in your
story.
(21:09):
But before we get off, I want topray with you tonight.
God, I'm just so grateful for mybrothers that are watching.
I'm thankful for them, Lord, andI know that of n a number of you
are in the biggest challenge ofyour life with your wife and
your family.
And you wanna you want it to bedifferent.
(21:31):
And so, Lord, I pray that youwould um open their hearts
tonight, that you speak deeplyinto them and show them that the
more that they are fathered byyou, the more impact you're
gonna make with their wives andtheir children and their
grandchildren one day.
Lord, I'm so grateful that uhyou took this broken football
player and taught him how to bea husband.
(21:55):
And he taught me how to be afather and a and uh now a
grandfather.
And I pray for every familythere that's watching, and I
pray you would do somethingprofound in them, Lord, just
like you have done for me andthousands of others have gone
through our courses, and thatthey have encountered you in in
a brand new way and have changedaway their fathers, and a change
(22:18):
away their husbands, and they'verecaptured the heart of their
wife and become the man of theirdreams, and they become the
father that their kids brag totheir friends about.
And I pray you would bless themin the name of the Father, Son,
and Holy Spirit in Jesus' name.
Amen.
So great to be with you.
It's Holy Week.
(22:40):
You'll get some specialdevotionals from me.
If you've not already signed up,you can sign up for that as well
every day.
I have a free devotion.
You can go to our website, anduh and and we're going through
Holy Week and all these amazingthings that Jesus did on the
cross.
Would love to send that to youas well.
(23:01):
And all that to say, I have alittle outro video to play, but
I'm so grateful that you'rehere.
And so this is Ed McGlassensigning off from high in the
mountains in Switzerland.
Rained the last two days, and sograteful to be here with my
grandkids and uh love them somuch.
(23:22):
God bless you.
SPEAKER_00 (23:26):
Dear friends, imagine a world where every
father feels equipped to leadwith faith, love, and purpose.
A world where families thriveand communities grow stronger
because of devoted,Christ-centered fathers.
SPEAKER_01 (23:41):
You know, beloved, that is the vision that God's
put in my heart for every singlefamily.
You know, he is on the move, Ibelieve.
He promises in Malachi thatbefore the great and coming day
of the Lord, he's gonna dosomething profound.
He's gonna turn the hearts offathers back towards their
(24:03):
children.
So the hearts of their childrenwill turn back to their father.
That's what God is doing.
I mean dads daily who want tolearn to be better fathers.
Yet many have never been shownhow.
Too many families are beingfractured to bitterness and with
parents and grandparents evenbeing canceled.
(24:25):
That's why we're launching anonline community to quit and to
be the fathers that God iscalled to be.
It's more than a program, it's apart of a movement that God is
already doing to reshapefatherhood.
It's a sacred calling rooted inthe teachings of pride.
(24:46):
And we're calling this theFatherhood Academy, where men
will embark on a journey ofhealing and spiritual
restoration that helps themtransform their family
relationship.
And to make this vision areality, would you consider
partnering with us financiallyif we continue to reach and
(25:10):
disciple every man, dad, andgrandpa that comes our way?
Your donation will help create aripple across the neighborhoods,
communities, you know, notfamiliar nature, anchoring each
job, your division in theunwavering love and guidance of
(25:30):
a devoted dad.
SPEAKER_00 (25:31):
Will you partner with us?
Your gift, whether a one-timedonation or ongoing monthly
support, will help to transformlives.
Together, we can equip fathersand grandfathers to lead with
faith and create a brighter,hopeful future for generations
(25:51):
to come.
Click the link to donate today.
Thank you for believing in thismission and joining us on this
transformative journey.
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