What do you do when someone you love is often negative, judgmental, or emotionally shut down—and you want to create a genuine, meaningful relationship with them? In this episode, Gary Zukav responds to a listener’s heartfelt question about their difficult relationship with a negative parent. Through his answer, Gary invites us to shift our understanding of where emotional pain comes from and how we can transform it into spiritual growth.
Gary explains that authentic power doesn’t come from trying to change or "fix" someone else—it comes from recognizing how others activate painful parts of our own personalities. When we encounter negativity, especially from someone we love, it can feel overwhelming. But instead of focusing outward, Gary guides us inward, encouraging us to become emotionally aware and take responsibility for what arises within us in those moments. That’s where true empowerment begins.
The solution? Shift your attention from the other person’s negativity to your own internal reaction. Let the painful physical sensations guide you to the frightened parts of your personality. Then, from the healthiest part of yourself, choose to respond with appreciation and love. These moments are powerful opportunities for growth.
What You’ll Discover in This Episode:
(00:42) — Why relationships themselves aren’t empowered—you are
(01:36) — How others activate internal dynamics that originate in fear
(02:30) — The role of physical sensations in identifying frightened parts of your personality
(03:45) — Why you can’t make your emotions disappear—but you can choose how to respond
(04:15) — How appreciation, even in challenging moments, becomes a path to spiritual growth
Embrace the Soul Step Challenge:
Think of someone in your life who tends to bring up frustration, disappointment, or judgment in you. When you feel that reaction arise, pause. Instead of trying to change them, explore what’s happening within you. What are you feeling in your chest, throat, and solar plexus? Can you stay with those sensations without blaming them for your discomfort? Ask yourself: Is this a frightened part of me? Then choose to act from the healthiest part of yourself—and notice what shifts.
Are you practicing judgment or discernment? Learn more as Gary explains the difference in this illuminating video.
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