March 26, 2025 • 53 mins
In this heartfelt and inspiring episode, Podcast Host Kathryn sits down with Rayne Clarkson to explore personal experiences with mental health, hope, and overcoming life’s challenges. Rayne, a commodity manager in the semiconductor industry and avid athlete, shares her journey of navigating hopelessness, finding resilience, and prioritizing connection.
The conversation highlights Rayne’s “RayneChats” project, where she connects with 365 strangers to learn from diverse perspectives, as well as her achievements in running marathons, triathlons, and a century bike ride despite setbacks like a car accident and heart condition. Rayne and Kathryn discuss goal-setting strategies, the impact of healthy habits like exercise and time in nature, and reframing grief as an expression of deep love.
They also delve into breaking free from negative thought patterns, the role of a supportive network, and the importance of hope in mental health and suicide prevention. Rayne shares her experiences witnessing loved ones struggle with hopelessness, as well as her own journey, and how therapy and connection helped with healing.
With candid stories and actionable insights, this episode is a testament to the power of resilience, connection, and hope in navigating life’s difficulties.
More about Rayne Clarkson:
Rayne Clarkson is a storyteller, adventurer, and advocate for the power of human connection in overcoming life’s challenges. Based in Austin, Texas, and the youngest of six sisters, she learned early on that connection is where hope grows. After discovering a hole in her heart earlier this year, Rayne chose to embrace the mountains and valleys of life with courage and hope. Her journey has taken her around the globe, running a full marathon, completing a century bike ride, skydiving, and even taking on challenges like Dry 2024.
Rayne’s “Stranger Journey,” documented through her Instagram project RayneChats, began as a tribute to her Mema. While navigating grief, she honored her Mema’s remarkable ability to connect with others, which remains one of her favorite qualities. Through this project, Rayne amplifies hope by sharing the unique and inspiring stories of others, embodying her belief that meaningful connections restore faith, inspire resilience, and counter hopelessness.
With six years of experience in the semiconductor industry and an MBA in finance, Rayne combines professional expertise with a passion for growth and connection. Her story is a testament to the profound strength that comes from human connection and the courage to take on life’s challenges head-on. Whether through her adventures, her professional achievements, or her commitment to amplifying hope, Rayne inspires others to embrace life’s possibilities and find light even in the darkest moments.
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(00:01):
This is Kathryn Goetzke,host of The Hope Matrix Podcast.
We are here to share science, storiesand strategies for how to hope.
I'm the Chief Hope officer of the ShineHope Company.
And SHINE is the mnemonicfor how we teach hope.
So when we talk about hope,we talk about how we use Stress Skills,
(00:22):
Happiness habits, Inspired Actions,Nourishing Networks
and Eliminating Challengeswhich are thinking patterns that
get in the way of our ability to hope.
Hope is a skill.
You can measure hope, you can teach hopeand you can start practicing skills
to activate higherhope in your life today.
(00:44):
And on this Hope Matrix podcast,we aim to bring in guests,
experts in science, people with stories,and those that have strategies
for activating hope in your life.
Well, helloeveryone, and welcome to the Hope Matrix
Podcast.
Today with me.
Have a guestwhom I have never met before and met
(01:09):
actually through one of our formerone of our previous guest Travis.
So I'm really excited to have Rayne heretoday.
I was told I had to meet you,I had to interview you
and you know, I basically dowhatever the universe tells me.
And Travis, as we were just chattingabout, is quite the wise soul.
So, I'm really grateful to have you heretoday.
(01:31):
Rayne Clarkson.
And just talk more, chatmore with you about hope and
and your shine hope story and, Yeah,just connect.
I learned so much from other peoplewhen I do this work.
So thank you for being here todayand welcome to the show.
How's everything going first?
(01:51):
First of all, how are you doing today?
Thank you so much, Kathryn,just for having me here.
first and foremost, I'mjust a big fan of your work.
Very much believe in it.
and it alignswell with my life and how I aim to live.
So thank you for everything that you do.
And I am so honored to be here.
I'm excited to talk with you.
(02:13):
shout outto Travis for just being an awesome,
connector and introducing me to you.
So I'm very grateful for him.
He's he's awesome.
And his podcastepisode with you was so good.
I love listening to it.
thank you so much. Yeah.
He's really he's amazing.
He's so wise, so wise.
So, Yeah, grateful for that for sure.
(02:35):
Thanks for acknowledging the work. It is.
this has been a long journey,long road to hope.
And I learn, you know, so much from othersand and from others experiences.
And we learn in lifethe easy way or the hard way.
And, you know, the goal of this is to helpkind of make it
a little bit easier for others.
(02:56):
And so, thanks again for joining the showand sharing more, about you and your story
and your journey,because that is really what I think
helps helps others more than anything.
So yeah.
Absolutely. Yeah.
So why don't we just start?
Why don't you just can you tell mea little bit about yourself?
Yeah. Where are you from?
(03:17):
Who you are.
Anything you want to share is awesome.
Let's do it.
so my name is Rayne Clarkson.
my first name is Rayne.
Just pronounced just like the weather.
but spelt R A Y N E.
I was named, actually,after two of my very favorite people.
My grandparents, my meemaw.
Her name was Nelda. And my papa.
His name was Ray.
(03:38):
So they got that Ray from Ray.
And then N E from Nelda to meet rainbow.
That's awesome.
I love being named after them.
I'm glad I will say Ray Nelda, but I.
Yeah. Right. Exactly.
Yeah. I'm from San Antonio, Texas.
I currently live inAustin for the past six years
(03:59):
and Iam fun fact and the youngest of six girls.
So I have oh, my mother's sisters.
Wow. No boys. No boys.
Oh my gosh, you're.
Only, That's a lot of drama.
I no, it can be.
Yes, yes, I you know.
(04:20):
All five of themare five of my very best friends.
And so we get all very well.
and I growing up, I didn't realize thatwas not always the case with siblings.
So I look back, and I'm just so fortunatefor just the friendships
that I have with them.
Yeah, that's amazing.
Not all.
Oh, not allsunshine and rainbows by any means, but.
Right, right. The most part.
(04:42):
and. Yeah.
And so I currently am a commodity managerin the semiconductor
industry is what I do.
Wow. Work in, the supply chainarea of that of,
the customers of big semiconductorcompanies that make we make the machines
that make the microchips.
So not necessarilythe microchips themselves.
(05:04):
but in involvedwith that whole supply chain
and do that sort of work on that end.
Wow. Are you an engineer?
I am supply chain is my background.
I just graduated, two weeks agonow, with with my masters, MBA
with a concentration in finance.
(05:25):
Good for you.
Congrats.
Feels good to. Be done with school.
I know, right?
At least for now.
You never know.
There might be.
More. Yes, yes. Yeah.
Never know. Right now.
We're doing a good break, though.
Yeah. Good.
Well, congrats.
Big milestone.
(05:45):
Yes. Yeah.
And I think that, Yeah, there's,there's a lot of different things
that, that I like to like to do.
I'm very active. I love to do, running.
I think we'll probably talk moreabout some of these things, later on,
but I very much enjoy being outdoorsand just very passionate
(06:07):
about sunrises, sunsets,being with people.
So that's kind. Of wherewe're at right now.
That's awesome.
There's lots of those in Austin.
Such a beautiful, beautiful area.
Yes. And I lovethe colors are so vivid there.
It feels like so sunrises and sunsets.
I can imagine there.
(06:28):
Quite beautiful in that. Yeah.
Yeah yeah.
We actually are getting our first.
Fall kind.
Of because usually it just goesstraight from like summer to
winter.
We kind of skip some seasons.
so you're getting the leaveschanging color right now in Austin,
which is very nice.
Wow. Does it get colder?
(06:49):
I mean.
Sometimes we have all the random freezesthat occur every.
Got it. But yeah.
Right now. As much. The degrees.
It's 70 right now.
Yeah.
But wow.
Yeah I mean it's pretty warm.
And Chicago you know compared toother times it's been zero a couple times.
(07:12):
But it has been a pretty mild winter.
Knock on wood. Thankfully.
That was very nice.
I went to Chicago for the first time.
actually twice this year.
I went in a two year time frame.
and then early November, Oh, cool.
Very pretty.
Oh, awesome.
Any plans to come back anytime soon?
(07:34):
Hopefully.
I, I definitely would like to,I was there for the leadership conference,
but it was it was awesome.
And I would I would definitely go back,especially in the fall timeframe.
Real good.
Yeah, I know, it's so pretty though.
The summer is really pretty too.
I actually we talked to Travisabout getting out here, so.
Yeah. Yes.
Yeah. So cool.
(07:55):
So yeah, I mean, I don't know how muchto share to you about what we do in here.
but the goal, you know,my goal in life really is to normalize
our conversation around hopelessness.
the moments of hopelessness we experience.
And, you know,we all experience them all the time
when you break down hopelessnessand what it really is looking at,
(08:17):
you know, emotional despair, you feel bad,angry, afraid, sad,
and then helpless.
you know, that that kind of helplessnesscomponent of doing,
of doing something about itor being able to do anything about it,
and that's really those that combinationof that despair and helplessness
that can really get us into trouble.
(08:38):
And, and so it's about,you know, normalizing the conversation
around it and,and then talking about strategies
for navigating our way through it inboth the small and big challenges of life.
And, you know, when hopelessness becomespersistent, that's when it becomes
clinical anxiety, depression.
That's when, you know, we see suicides,we see things like shootings that happen.
(09:02):
And and you know, if,you know, in my experience,
so many people fear the conversationaround hopelessness and
don't want to talk about it,and that it's that fear that
actually it just makes itworse, makes everything worse.
And so, yeah,so I'm grateful to you for joining today
and being able to share,kind of your own story.
(09:24):
and looking at somethingthat you were challenged with and,
and had a challenge with and learningfrom you on how you navigated
your way through it, just shareand examples of the kind of evidence
based framework that we've created aroundhow what we know kind of gets us to hope.
But again,these skills are different for everyone.
And so by sharing,you know, we help just elevate
(09:46):
the kinds of ways we can get throughthrough these challenges.
So again, thanks for joining today.
And yeah. So what is on your mind?
What would you what are you openand willing to share with us.
Yeah.
so I, I would say that I oftenlook at my life and I'm like,
(10:07):
I feel like I'm constantlyliving in these extremes.
So, like, one minuteI'm on the mountaintop.
I was in Machu Picchu just a week ago.
hiking,the Inca Trail, three nights, four days,
and just dancingon the most majestic view.
And with just peoplefrom all around the world.
(10:29):
and then I look at momentsover the past year where I was, you
know, crying in the kitchenon the floor of my new apartment
that I just moved intothat was cockroach infested,
earlier,then went skydiving earlier this year
and witnessed my sister give birthand got to see the miracle of life.
And then I have these momentsof where I went through,
(10:52):
three car accidents at the beginningof the year, three cars, in one month.
found out I had a hole in my heart.
that was a huge a huge thing for me.
so I look at.
I look at these moments in my lifeof where I was literally
on the mountaintops,just like so much joy.
(11:15):
And then I have these momentswhere I was in just.
Deep.
Despair, like just in the valleys.
And I know thatin with having both, I am.
Like, why?
Why am I always in these extremes?
Like, why is it just so highs and lows,highs and lows?
but I look at it and I'm like,I truly can't,
(11:37):
you can't have one without the other.
And I look at the moments of when I'vebeen on those mountaintops, and I see that
I have so much more appreciationfor those moments,
because I've known what it feels liketo be in the depths of the valleys.
and Ithink, able to remember those moments of
when I am in those valleys of like,hey, this isn't forever.
(12:00):
There is light in the darkness.
And that's somethingthat I always try to remind myself.
but through that, I think thatlife is truly about connection.
And I think that connectionis where hope grows.
And so from a lot of these journeys,and things in my life,
(12:20):
something that has been very,constant for me, that has helped me
find hope is through connection.
And that's with myself, with others and,with the world around me.
so I'm always trying to find opportunitiesto connect with people.
(12:41):
and something that has really givenme hope is I've been on this,
I like to call it my stranger journey.
So it's the ideais that life is truly about connection.
And I think similar to to you.
And your approach with this podcastis that each time you interact
with someone, you can learn something new.
(13:03):
And every time that I meet a new person,I see them as someone that truly can bring
value and I can learn from.
And so I started this thing,I call it rain chats.
It's my stranger journey where Ithe idea is to highlight 365
different people.
(13:23):
and all of these interactions have beensome have been just random,
like, I'll be in lineat a coffee shop and I,
start a conversation with someoneor some have been on the plane,
the people I'm sitting next to.
last year I was fortunate to doa trip around the globe, for my job,
(13:44):
and met a number of peopleall over the world, which has been cool.
But I started an Instagram accountcalled Rain Chats
to kind of just follow along,and share my journey.
I take a picture of the people and Ihave a set of questions that I ask people.
(14:05):
and I think that it's been so cool,Kathryn, just to learn,
learn from peopleand hear their different perspectives.
it gives me hope.
And so I share it then on Instagramjust to amplify that and hope.
and in hopes that other peoplewill be able to see their stories
and get a little bit of hopeand remind themselves that, hey,
(14:29):
we're we're really not alone.
Like, there's so many peoplethat we're going through struggles.
And so, yeah,that's a little bit about me, kind of what
I like to, to really focus on inlife is connection.
Yeah.
That is so cool.
I didn't even know that rain chat.
On Instagram. Yes.
(14:49):
Yeah.
I mean, you know, it's so easy to complainabout things that aren't going
well or that we, you know,we don't have enough friends
or we don't know people or, you know,I see I, I've heard
that from people and it's, it's like howhow can we sell that?
Then what can we do?
And to me that's a perfect exampleof something you can do.
You don't have to know anyone.
(15:10):
You don't have to have any friendsto do this.
Like every day, go and connectwith someone, get their story,
talk to them, ask them questions,learn about them I love that.
Yeah, yeah.
It really, it it.
Kind of started from a few things,but a big thing was, I started it shortly
(15:32):
after I lost my meemaw, and I talkeda little bit about being named after her.
One of my very favorite people,was super close with her
and would talk to herconstantly, and ended up, she passed away.
and one of my favorite things about her,was that she knew no stranger.
(15:52):
Like, we would be, just anywhere.
And she would have the abilityto just dive deep with people and connect.
And I would always look at how she hadthe ability to make people feel like
they were the most important personin the world, and she would walk away.
I could see that she was filled up.
And I would also see that the personthat she was engaged
(16:12):
with, was a lot lighter as well.
And so it was kind ofI started the journey as a tribute to her,
of her passing in me, honoringone of my favorite things about her.
But I also have just it's become thisbeautiful thing
because I think that people are justhave this
(16:33):
desire to connect with peopleand sometimes don't know how to start.
And I have so many peoplethat I'm at 180 people
now is where I'm at my strength.
and some of the people, it'sbeen connections
that I have just in those, in that momentand will stay connected
through Instagram or some peopleI never have interacted with again.
(16:54):
And some have, like now, becomemy very best friends that I talk to daily.
So it's very cool to just see the range.
But each interaction,I would say I've had so much value in it,
and I still have people that will reachback out to me and be like,
hey, like that really inspired meto connect with other people too.
And now I'll start conversationsjust out in the open.
(17:16):
and I think that it, I think often timeswhen I've felt hopeless or very sad,
I try to really go about the approachof connecting with others,
because I think it always makes me feelbetter afterwards.
And I don't know if you've heard the,the saying of
if when you're feeling down,go give massive love to someone else.
(17:38):
and it always just like, makes me feelso much better and like rain.
Just get out of this darknessand, like, go find the light.
Because you can find it like it's there.
And sometimes it's.
A lot harder to find than others.
but light shows upin so many different forms through people,
through sunrises and sunsets or music.
(17:58):
Yeah. Yeah, absolutely.
Yeah.
I know it's easy when we get stuckin our like, no, nobody loves me.
I don't have I don't have thisor that to just get to sit and that.
And it's so importantto stop that train of thought,
that kind of challenge that you know,what our mind does
and come up with a solution.
Like, what can we do?
(18:18):
And like you said, it's it's oftenjust give what you most want
and you then receive it, you know.
So yeah, it's so powerful.
Is there something that happened180 days ago
or whenever this startedthat kind of figured it or prompted it?
I would say really the,the passing of my mama was a big thing
(18:39):
of, of mean is navigating grieffor the first time
and grief just hits people so differentlyand shows up very differently.
but yeah, I think that that was a big,a big thing that that triggered it
just as a tribute to her.
in wanting towanting to amplify the hope,
too, of that's why I share it,on Instagram,
(19:02):
just in hopes that it will inspire others.
to find hopeor to find, connection with others.
so. Yeah.
Yeah. That's awesome. Yeah.
And when you look at hopelessness, though,and often, you know, when we lose someone
that's like, of courseyou're in despair and of course
you're experiencing helplessnessbecause you can't bring that person back.
(19:24):
And so it's like,and I was, you know, when I lost my dad,
I was stuck in a persistent stateand developed clinical depression from it
because it didn't do the thingsthat were healthy to do.
And did,you know, a lot of unhealthy things.
And so we talk about that despair.
So it's, you know, it'ssadness, it's anger, it's fear.
And so losing someoneof course, is going to trigger that.
(19:46):
So how you know, how did you experiencesadness in a healthy way?
What did you do to process the griefto navigate your way through.
Yeah. I would say ahad some unhealthy ways as well of just.
Isolating myself and being very justsad and sitting in my grief.
(20:10):
But I would say some of the big thingswere, exercising.
I started to run, andbeing outside in nature,
I think that is a huge thingof just admiring the creation around me.
I'm especially seeking sunrisesand sunsets, and talking to people.
I think connection waswas the biggest thing that helped me
(20:32):
through that grief and talking to othersthat have experienced it, too.
it just gives you that feelingthat you're not alone.
and it makes it just a lot more manageableand really reframing the grief of.
Of. How beautiful it isthat I get to experience grief,
(20:53):
how I love someone so much that it hurtsthis badly to be without.
And I think of that all the time,of even the highs and lows of life.
It's it givesyou just so much appreciation.
You really can't have onewithout the other.
And I always think of the,the, the quote, for what is grief?
(21:13):
But love endured and you would not knowgrief if you had not known a great love.
And so I think I felt that a lot.
And that gives me a lot of hope.
Yeah, absolutely.
Oh, I know it's so powerful.
It's incredible to have such, you know,deep relationships in life, you know,
and and yet the other side of thatis yeah, everyone passes at some point.
(21:37):
And we've got to navigate thatand we've got to find our way through it.
yeah.
And you talk a bit about,you know, the sadness and the isolation
and you know, that that iswe do that so much when we're in pain
and when we lose someone.
And yet that's really the timewe we need to be connecting.
(21:58):
And it's so challenging to do.
So I think it's like it's a beautifulbalance of, you know, having time alone
to be sad and to honor and expressyour sadness in ways that are healthy,
you know, and like you said,not get stuck in that sadness
kind of cycle in the pit of sadness,and then also finding healthy ways
of connecting through that,you know, in ways that work
(22:20):
and everyone experiencesgrief in different ways, you know,
and it needs to managemanage it in different ways.
And but people do, you know,it is important to have connections
and people through that.
So yeah, it's really important.
And then, you know, we often stop doingthe things that are healthy for us.
So we talk about happiness habits.
And you know, you talk about runninglike it when we go through hard times,
(22:44):
we often stop doing those thingsbecause we're so stuck in our sadness.
And yet when we get overwhelmed withstress hormones, that's when we get sick,
you know?
And so learninghow to cultivate those happiness habits,
and those hormones that we need to,to feel good and engaged and connected in
life is is super important.
(23:06):
So you mentioned runningas and get in in nature.
Are there other things.
Yeah.
dancingI love to I'm not very good at dancing,
but I get stressful meeting,turning on some music and dancing it out.
I think that's such a goodjust stress relief of movement. Yes.
(23:26):
And so I very much valuejust exercise in general.
I grew up always playing sportsand so I'm big on I love playing
soccer and tennis and basketball.
And I've really gotten into doing running.
So I ran my first marathon,this past year.
So that was super awesome.
Yeah.
I, I went to Maine and ran it there.
(23:48):
my, I had two bucket list items.
It was a run, a full marathon.
And see the sunrise in Maine.
because it's like the first spot.
You can see the sunrise in the US.
So. Interesting. Same jump together.
but yeah, Iwould say movement is a huge thing for me.
And I think that was somethingthat really, really shook me
(24:09):
at the beginning of the year.
So I, I mentioned earlier,I found out that I had a hole in my heart.
so at the very beginning of the year,I was in a car
accident, told my carand was going through PT afterwards,
I was struggled with my back and just,overcoming that.
(24:33):
and I had to buy a new carbecause my last car was totaled,
so I bought a new car.
most people have, you know, a new carfor, like, at least a year,
before they wreck it.
But I had mine for two weeks, and,yeah, I.
Had my new car, and I had was justwent to go get my annual physical done,
(24:56):
and they checked me out,and they like rain.
Did you know you have a heart murmur?
And I was like,no, I've never been told that.
And they're like, nothing to be concernedabout, but we want to look into it.
so soanyway, that same day I was in my car
and I like,I think I was just overwhelmed
by everything.
I was on a meetingand had just found out about this
(25:17):
and just a little bit kind of shaken up.
But I was in a parking spot.
Katherine and I back up and I.
I, my car hit a fire.
Hydrant and took the entire front.
Off of the vehicle.
Oh my gosh.
And I sat there.
And I just cried for an hourlike I was supposed
(25:39):
to go back into the officeand, like, had all these meetings and.
I just.
Couldn't. I was so overwhelmed.
And I, I would say that was a.
Moment of hopelessness.
Yeah, it's. Totally.
It's like no brand new car here.
so then, Shortlyafter that, that car was in the shop
and I was borrowing my sister's old car,and I had a lot of other appointments,
(26:04):
to go through, about my heart.
In a few weeks pass,and they told me that they
they found, a hole in,between my upper chambers of my heart,
and made my whole heart quote,like, enlarged,
because of the extra blood flow.
and so that same day,I was driving my sister's car back
(26:28):
from that appointment of finding that out,and I think
I was just kind of all over the placeagain.
And, all of a sudden the car is like,not going past 20mph on the highway.
And I'm like.
Oh my gosh, what's going on?
So it broke down.
On the.
Highway and I was running for four.
Hours. So Ijust so I went through,
(26:51):
three cars in the span of one month.
Oh my gosh.
But yeah, and.
Just went througha bunch of different, tests.
And I think finding out about the holein my heart was, was super scary for me.
One of just I am big on exercising,and one thing that is huge on
(27:12):
my mental health is movement.
And having that fear of of losingthat in some cases.
I had to wear a heart monitor for,a while, and I had a live phone
that was monitoring me.
I was going through, just abunch of overwhelming,
(27:35):
in and out of the hospitaland those sort of things.
And I think I didn't want to accept thatit was real.
I think I kind of, a lot of timesI suppress it and be like, okay,
if I don't think about it, it's not.
It's not a thing. Yeah.
But what I tried to really shiftmy focus was on things
that I could control,and I didn't want to give up movement.
(28:00):
So I did thingsthat I could still control.
and I didn't let it hold me back.
Kathryn, even though I knew that,that this was a thing, I ran my first.
I ran two half marathons this year.
I ran my first full marathon.
I ran my first,I did my first century bike ride.
(28:21):
So, 100 mile bike ride.
yeah. Wow.
Olympic triathlons.
so I was.
Trying not to let those things, hold me.
Back. Yeah.
Yeah, I'm assuming with, like, doctorapproval and healthy ways.
I guess for the most part.
(28:43):
Yeah, maybe this varies a little bit, but,But, yes,
you're in taking care of yourself.
Yeah. Being smart.
Yeah. Good.
I know, I mean, it's so important.
Like when we are,you know, if you break a leg,
I mean, you know, I blew my knee up.
You got to exercise in a different way.
You've got, like, I've got to exercise.
(29:04):
Movement is so critical for me too.
And so it's like I had to get creativeabout how I did that.
I mean, even, you know, moving my armsor doing weights, like with,
you know, just anything, you know,super important and building ourselves
back up to the best of our abilityto, you know, that we can, yeah.
(29:24):
That's amazing. That's that's.
So good.
How do you set goals?
So when you take,you know, when you're like,
I'm going to do it, how do you do it?
So I mean, that's a good question.
I love setting goals.
I'm constantly,writing out things
that I want to want to accomplish.
and I do them, so,for example, this year
(29:44):
I wanted to run the full marathon.
So I wrote that out, and I have Isay I write it out as my adventure
list. for.
Nice. Yes, I love it.
I'm very much like pen and paper.
I love checking, taking it all. Yeah.
Friday, I got to check one off.
I had bought a new car,and my goal was to pay it off in a year,
(30:06):
and so I paid it off on Friday,so I got to do that.
Oh my gosh, that's awesome.
Congrats. Thank you.
say. Having them written outis like huge for me in my goal setting.
And I love being able to,share it also with others.
And I like to ask my friendswhat goals are you working on?
And, have them hold me accountable.
(30:28):
And if there's anything we can dotogether, do those.
Like, for example, the marathonI did in Maine,
I did it was one of my best friendsfrom middle school.
and we ran that together.
So that was really fun.
That is so awesome.
You're just like a living,shining example of hope.
That's so good.
That's what we know about goals,you know, goal hope is a lot about goals.
(30:50):
Like what do you hope forand like can you get there and
and writing down your goalsand checking in with someone regularly.
You're like up to 95% more likelyto achieve, if you do those two things
and you know, you're not necessarily like,did you learn that in school?
Where did you, you know.
Question I don't know.
I've always been very mucha visual person.
(31:15):
So I like to. Have.
I always have my, planner and I'm like,okay, this is what I'm doing in the day,
maybe sometimes a little excessivelyif like, I like to open and, like,
relook at my goal and like,what goal can I check out some like,
oh, I have skydiving on here.
Okay, I'm going to do it this weekend.
Like, I mean look at likelike oh I. To go to Machu Picchu okay.
I went last week and likesome of those things.
(31:38):
But I think that was another huge thingthat I have just
learned over the past.
I think with discovering the holein my heart,
it kind of made me understandjust my mortality.
You know, if it's just too shortnot to make the most
of every single moment,of every connection of every day.
(32:03):
And so I always want to make sure I'mmaking the most of every single day.
And that was a big thing of my list.
And like, okay,I have this bucket list. Like, why?
and things I want to do, I'm like,what's what's stopping me?
Why not just do them right? Right.
A little abouthow many things do you have on it?
(32:24):
you know, I don't know, I think I.
I haveI don't know the exact count now,
but I had at 1.100 things, and,so, I learned this from,
a very good mentor of mine.
so I have my, like, adventure list,and then after I do things,
(32:44):
I move it to my smile fileso I can go back and reflect on.
And, like, like, brings me joy.
Yeah.
Yeah, I love that. My smile. Smile.
Good one. Nice.
That's awesome.
And I think.
Having goalsand things to look forward to,
I think that is a huge thing for me.
(33:07):
especially if I'm in momentsof feeling down or having a hard time.
I'm like, okay, what?
Is there something that I can plan?
Is there a trip?
Is there somethingthat I can sign up to do?
Is there a cooking class I can take?
What is somethingthat's been on your list that I can,
go and plan?
I know that's the huge thing for meis having something to look forward to.
(33:28):
And absolutely that's that's key to hope.
So yeah, when you're feeling down.
But think about exactly just that.
Like what can I do in the future futureoriented that I could look forward to
and that I could work towardsand take steps towards and and
yeah, so, so important.
you know, the E and R shine is eliminatingchallenges which are thinking
(33:52):
patterns or negative thought patterns thatget in the way of our ability to hope.
So thing is like ruminationwhen we internalize failures.
So like we fail at somethingand then we're like, I'm a failure.
I'm horrible at everything.
You know, I suck.
things like worrying about the future.
You mentioned controlling things outsideof your control, like trying to do that.
(34:14):
We we try to do that all the time,and that leads to hopelessness.
You know, things like,let's see, attaching to outcomes
is a big onewhen we get really attached to our goals.
Like for attach to that specific goal,it doesn't work.
We can of course,we're going to get into that despair
and helplessness kind of cycle.
(34:36):
So what are confirmation bias.
Negative biasor like so many things that our brain does
that just kind of works against us for,you know, everything we hope for.
So do you have any of those challenges?
Do you.
Care?
Yes, absolutely. Yes.
I would say one of my biggest,A lot of those resonated with me.
(35:00):
But one of my biggestis that I am often a perfectionist.
So and I,I very much tend to be a people pleaser.
So that is somethingthat I am continuing to overcome.
that, but whenI care a lot about
(35:21):
often others opinions and recentlyI let someone's opinion.
Be way too loud in my head.
and way.
Too much space and cause a lot of doubt,in my ability had me questioning myself.
And I think that,caused me to to ruminate, quite a bit
(35:45):
and go into a little bit of depressionat times of like, thinking.
I really started to believewhat they said about me.
And so, yeah, I would say thatthat's something
that I definitely struggle with.
but learning to overcome.
yeah.
Yeah.
And what do you do to navigate it?
(36:08):
Yeah. That's it.
I would say one of the biggest thingsis stepping into something new.
so oftentimes either.
Like trying something newor removing myself from the situation,
(36:29):
I think a big thing as well isI feel very fortunate that
I have a lot of great people in my life.
I have some incredible mentors.
So, like,calling my board of advisors, I'm.
Sure you've heard that term or.
Yeah, but people that.
That very much support me in that I,that I value their opinions and thoughts.
(36:53):
And so I'll, go to some of them,and just try to work through like,
hey, what is it that I could bedoing differently and have them help
support me to do, that differentlyor to just have them speak
words of encourage?
Oftentimes,I think that it takes someone else
believing in youfor you to believe in yourself.
(37:15):
And I feel so fortunatethat I have people in my life
that oftentimes, would believe in memore than I believed in myself.
And that was huge.
I think they don't even knowthe impact that they've had on me.
and even justjust strangers in some cases of
(37:36):
kindness and where people are,I've been so down or sad
and just people showed melittle glimmers of light.
that meant more than they would ever know.
I look at.
Those moments, and it makes mejust want to always make sure
I'm giving that to other people as well.
(37:58):
It's like I realize how much that meantto me,
those little things and like,took me out of dark times.
so I want to be able to do that for othersas well.
Yeah, yeah.
Every interaction we have matters.
You know so much.
We have no idea what other peopleare going through or what
(38:18):
they're experiencingand how meaningful full a deep like a deep
look into someone's eyes and a smileand a, you know, kind of connection.
And like you said, strangers.
And I think it's so beautifulthat you're doing that,
with yourInstagram and, and, 180
and it'll be 1000 someday, I'm sure.
(38:41):
It's so cool to think aboutjust all the connections
you know, you'll be makingthroughout your life as you do those.
That's so cool.
yeah.
And you talked about,like, the perfection is.
I mean, one thing I think is fascinatingabout our brain and one of the things
our brain does, it'sgot this negative bias.
So, you know, 100 people could be sayingkind of loving,
(39:02):
affirming things to us about how amazingand how good we are at this
or why we have value andand our brain will listen
to that one that says something negative.
You know, it'sjust that's how our brain is wired.
And then it'll like get ruminateon that negative thing.
(39:23):
And it just it does.
It has the powerto just take over our whole brain.
And then that can be our.
Yeah.
And it's kind of amazing that it doesthat.
And to me, I think just even knowing thatfact that our brain does that and it's
just a tendency and it's an old thingthat used to help us like
look for threats in our environmentand keep us safe,
(39:46):
but that it's an old, outdated mechanismin our brain that we just really have
to kind of retrain to go back tothose things that are positive and that.
So, you know, I never I didn't like the,the word of for affirmations.
I just thought they're crazy.
And yet I find they're so valuableand so important.
And when I start to hearany of the negative things
(40:09):
louder that I'm thinking of,the positive things that I bring,
those affirmations into my lifeand say them
and repeat them so that, you know,as you do that, you take that focus,
that tendency of your brainto focus on that negative kind of chatter.
And, you know,it can just take the steering wheel and go
(40:31):
and just drive youinto this pit of despair,
you know,and it's horrible that it does that.
so it's really important andit's really just about being intentional.
And, you know,so much of what other people say about us
is based on their own experiencesand their own baggage
and their own,you know, projecting oftentimes.
(40:53):
And so kind of becoming aware of that and,and have having compassion
for those people and also, you know,having healthy boundaries around it.
And, you know,you talk about the importance of network.
And it's really, you know, it'snot the quality of our network.
It's really the quality.
And like, are they healthy for us?
(41:13):
Are they helping us movetowards our goals, or are they kind of
getting in the wayand holding us back or keeping us down?
And it's important to kind of identifythat and reflect on that.
Absolutely.
Yeah. And I think walking. Into youor they,
making you feel like you're pouringfrom an empty cup sort of thing they take.
Yeah, yeah.
(41:34):
Absolutely, absolutely.
Well, so how are youand how is your heart these days?
It feels warm.
Full these net. Yes.
yeah.
So right now I got, cleared to livethis beautiful thing called life.
and. Yeah, just something toto monitor over time.
(41:56):
they said that at this point,it would do more damage to go in
and do surgery to correct it.
So just living with this, this holeand filling it with,
All the good thingslife has to offer, all the.
Things I love it.
Yeah. That's amazing.
Oh, good for you.
Good for you. So what's next on your list?
(42:22):
I would say that.
The. Machu Picchu and pain of the carwere huge ones and skydiving.
And I added five new states,this past year.
I'm trying to get all 50 states.
is is kind of on the plan,but next, going to Africa next year.
(42:43):
so, whereabouts?
Yoga?
Wellness? 749. Yeah.
Oh, really super excited about that.
Yeah. And.
but yeah, this is the time of yearthat I'm going to rewrite out my goals.
Yeah, sort of next year.
So I'm excited about that.
so I haven't spent as much time,doing that at this time, but,
(43:07):
with finishing school, I actually justbeen, switched jobs,
This month, Month agoso that the past,
my past role for six years.
And now I just joined a new company.
But, yeah.
I feel like there's,a lot of great opportunity ahead.
(43:27):
yeah. Yeah.
One of the really cool thingsthat you brought up about hope
throughout all of this is, you know,hope is one of
the only things Dan Tomasello wrote Learnhopefulness.
He's kind of one of my advisors,as you said.
And next words, he, talks abouthope is the one thing
that you need the negativeto kind of get to the positive,
(43:52):
you know,so it's like having that contrast.
And if we can start to embracethat contrast, because it really gives us
insight into what we care about,what's important to us, what
how the how that, you know, angerthat's like how deeply we feel,
we can use that to propel usto what we aspire to,
(44:15):
what we seek, what what we hope for,and give us some momentum to get there.
And I think that's a, you know,you put it so beautifully.
I think in, in, you know, the hillsand the valleys and, you know,
it is like you do have those momentswhere you're
just like in a heap on the floor,like, I can't can I can I navigate,
can I get through this?
(44:36):
And then you are like on the top,like looking over Machu Picchu going,
oh my God, what an absolutely amazing,extraordinary place.
This is, you know, and that's it'svery like that's what life is.
So, you know, I believe and and Dan saysit's the hope is rare in that in that
you know it it takes really both sides.
(44:59):
so that's really, really coolthat you, you knew that already.
So learning. Yeah. Yeah.
Right. Exactly. It's a process.
It's just a matter of rememberingwhen we're on the in a heap on the floor
that, you know, there is that other sideand we can get there.
And it takes work on our part, you know,and it sounds like you're doing the things
(45:20):
to do the work, you know,which is also another important
kind of part of hope is we it's, you know,our hope is up to us really.
You know, connectionsfuel it absolutely for sure.
And yet we've got to do the workto make the connections or,
you know, to to get out of our despairand get back to feeling better
(45:42):
and and to get out of our helplessnessand take action where we can.
And so, you know, and it's I believe it'slike a muscle and you have to build it.
You have to learnkind of how to hope, you know,
how to get good at hope the process.
So yeah.
Is there anything else you want to sharewith our listeners again,
your Instagram so we can it is.
(46:04):
Rain chats R A Y and Eand then chats if you want to follow
along on the journey.
so with a y and I love it rain. Yes.
Well I any rain chats on Instagramso super cool.
So you can see all of the strangersor people that rain is meeting all over
(46:26):
and maybe be inspired to start your own,or to start having conversations
with strangers.
Because I do agree with you.
Everyone has something to teach us.
Every single person on this planethas something
to teach us, and it's up to usto kind of discover that.
So yeah. Awesome.
Any final, final thoughts or wordsthat you want to share?
(46:48):
Yeah, I just want to thank youjust for for everything that you do.
I think that when I first, heard from youand heard about what your mission is,
I got just so excited about it, Catherine,because I've just
I've especially in,just sometimes in my industry that I'm in,
I've had people that thathave really reiterated to me
(47:09):
that hope is not a business model.
And I struggle with that because I am avery hopeful person and finding you and.
Your. Work.
I was like,this is exactly what I believe in.
And like, I just love what you're sharingand how you have all of the research
and the things that back it, I think issuch a powerful, just message to people.
(47:34):
And I'm like, I just want to telleveryone, listen to this.
Like is real.
And it is measurableand you need hope in your life.
I think that without hope, it's,it's not necessarily
a life worth living like.
It's it's hard to live without hope.
So I just want to thank you so muchfor just the message that you share
and the light that you are to others.
(47:57):
Oh thank you. That's so kind.
I really appreciate that.
Yeah, there's a famous business book.
Hope is not a strategy,which works against me
doing work in the business world.
And yet I have an MBA as well.
And I'm a very,you know, I'm a strategist by nature,
and I think hope is the most important,important strategy
(48:18):
in the workplace when you look atand it's a top four need of employees.
So it's super important.
So I'm glad to hear thatyou're spread the message.
Yeah, it is measurable.
And you know,if you measure your hope in the workplace,
it's going to tell you so muchabout your workplace outcomes.
And when you think about hope, it'sall about goals.
So and workplaces are really builton goals and attaining goals
(48:39):
and overcoming obstacles to goals.
So yeah.
Different than a vision. Yes.
Yeah. Exactly. Exactly.
That'sI mean that's really my definition of hope
is it's a visionfor something in your future
and you fuel it with positive feelingsand then inspired actions.
You know that. Yeah.
(49:00):
So awesome.
So if your workplace ever needs,you know, some
someone to come do some work with themand hope I'm more than happy.
I love I love talking to workespecially, you know, engineers and, and
and the more manufacturing typeof the more and a little,
you know, folks so getting themand understanding your perspective.
(49:25):
Yeah, exactly.
And then an understandingof how feelings like fuel that as well
and can either support usor get in the way of our ability to hope.
Super important.
yeah. Awesome.
So thank you for bringing that up andand for honoring my work, I appreciate it.
It's not it's not been an easy journeyto hope, that's for sure.
(49:45):
There's, you know,investing in in a preventative protective
factors oftennot something we do as a society.
And yet we're,we're we're making that turn.
So I'm super grateful.
And a lot of work on hoped to come.
So I'm looking forwardto seeing connected with you.
And I thank you for sharing your storyand your experience and your strategies
(50:08):
for Hope. Really helpful.
I learned a lot and I'm super grateful.
And to all the listeners for listeningand thank you so much.
you know, wewe aim to educate and inspire here.
So, thinking that hopefullyyou got some good stuff out of this.
And, we thank you for listening in.
(50:28):
And if someone says so inspired,please do share this with others.
And rain, thanks again.
Have a wonderful day.
And as we say,keep shining, keep shining. Hope.
Thanks a lot.
Thank you all for listening into the Hope Matrix podcast.
We want to shine a lightthat hope is teachable.
Hope is measurable and teachableand provide you with actionable insights
(50:52):
for how you can start activatinghope in your life today
and provide a framework so you can starttalking about hope with other people
and practice these skills togetherbecause we are better with hope.
Please feel free to check outtheshinehopecompany.com, where we list
all of our resources around how to Hope.
We have a lot of free programsfor how to hope, including the five day
(51:15):
Challenge, our Hope infographicwith a lot of skills
that showcase how to hope and articlesof how to incorporate hope in your life.
We have The Hopebeat Weekly,which is a weekly newsletter
that shares strategies for hope.
We have a My Hope Story templates soyou can write your own Hope story today.
Also my Hope Hero so we can sharewhat our heroes are doing to activate
(51:39):
hope in their lives.
And this is especially good with youthso they can start looking up
to people that have overcome similaror challenges to them
and seen how these heroes use the ShineHope framework.
We have a Hopeful Minds for Teens programand Hopeful minds Overview
Educator Guides.
We have a new evidencebased college course so you can activate
(52:00):
Hope on the college campus.
There are programs in the workplace.
Overview courses 90 minute coursesfor learning the what,
why and how to hope.
What I want you to know about hopeis it's a skill.
You've got to practice these skillsto become hopeful.
It's easyto fall into despair and helplessness
when we deal with challenges in life,and it takes intentional work
(52:23):
and practice to get to hope.
And yet it is always possible.
So no matter what life brings.
Keep shining hope.
Thanks so much for listeningand have an awesome day.
And of course, I’ve got to add this, thatthis program is designed to assist you
in learning about hope should not be usedfor medical advice, counseling,
(52:44):
or other health related services.
iFred, The Shine Hope Company and myself,Kathryn Goetzke
do not endorse or provide any medicaladvice, diagnosis or treatment.
I am not a medical doctor.
The information provided hereshould not be used for the diagnosis
or treatment of any medical conditionand cannot be substituted
(53:05):
for the advice of physicians, licenseprofessionals or therapists
who are familiarwith your specific situation.
Consulta licensed medical profession or call 911.
If you are in need of immediate assistanceand be sure to know the crisis Hotline.
988. If you are in need of support.
(53:26):
Thanks so much for listening.
Take good care of yourselfand keep shining hope.
This is Kathryn Goetzke,host of The Hope Matrix Podcast.
We are here to share science, storiesand strategies for how to hope.
I'm the Chief Hope officer of the ShineHope Company.
And SHINE is the mnemonicfor how we teach hope.
So when we talk about hope,we talk about how we use Stress Skills,
(00:22):
Happiness habits, Inspired Actions,Nourishing Networks
and Eliminating Challengeswhich are thinking patterns that
get in the way of our ability to hope.
Hope is a skill.
You can measure hope, you can teach hopeand you can start practicing skills
to activate higherhope in your life today.
(00:44):
And on this Hope Matrix podcast,we aim to bring in guests,
experts in science, people with stories,and those that have strategies
for activating hope in your life.
Well, helloeveryone, and welcome to the Hope Matrix
Podcast.
Today with me.
Have a guestwhom I have never met before and met
(01:09):
actually through one of our formerone of our previous guest Travis.
So I'm really excited to have Rayne heretoday.
I was told I had to meet you,I had to interview you
and you know, I basically dowhatever the universe tells me.
And Travis, as we were just chattingabout, is quite the wise soul.
So, I'm really grateful to have you heretoday.
(01:31):
Rayne Clarkson.
And just talk more, chatmore with you about hope and
and your shine hope story and, Yeah,just connect.
I learned so much from other peoplewhen I do this work.
So thank you for being here todayand welcome to the show.
How's everything going first?
(01:51):
First of all, how are you doing today?
Thank you so much, Kathryn,just for having me here.
first and foremost, I'mjust a big fan of your work.
Very much believe in it.
and it alignswell with my life and how I aim to live.
So thank you for everything that you do.
And I am so honored to be here.
I'm excited to talk with you.
(02:13):
shout outto Travis for just being an awesome,
connector and introducing me to you.
So I'm very grateful for him.
He's he's awesome.
And his podcastepisode with you was so good.
I love listening to it.
thank you so much. Yeah.
He's really he's amazing.
He's so wise, so wise.
So, Yeah, grateful for that for sure.
(02:35):
Thanks for acknowledging the work. It is.
this has been a long journey,long road to hope.
And I learn, you know, so much from othersand and from others experiences.
And we learn in lifethe easy way or the hard way.
And, you know, the goal of this is to helpkind of make it
a little bit easier for others.
(02:56):
And so, thanks again for joining the showand sharing more, about you and your story
and your journey,because that is really what I think
helps helps others more than anything.
So yeah.
Absolutely. Yeah.
So why don't we just start?
Why don't you just can you tell mea little bit about yourself?
Yeah. Where are you from?
(03:17):
Who you are.
Anything you want to share is awesome.
Let's do it.
so my name is Rayne Clarkson.
my first name is Rayne.
Just pronounced just like the weather.
but spelt R A Y N E.
I was named, actually,after two of my very favorite people.
My grandparents, my meemaw.
Her name was Nelda. And my papa.
His name was Ray.
(03:38):
So they got that Ray from Ray.
And then N E from Nelda to meet rainbow.
That's awesome.
I love being named after them.
I'm glad I will say Ray Nelda, but I.
Yeah. Right. Exactly.
Yeah. I'm from San Antonio, Texas.
I currently live inAustin for the past six years
(03:59):
and Iam fun fact and the youngest of six girls.
So I have oh, my mother's sisters.
Wow. No boys. No boys.
Oh my gosh, you're.
Only, That's a lot of drama.
I no, it can be.
Yes, yes, I you know.
(04:20):
All five of themare five of my very best friends.
And so we get all very well.
and I growing up, I didn't realize thatwas not always the case with siblings.
So I look back, and I'm just so fortunatefor just the friendships
that I have with them.
Yeah, that's amazing.
Not all.
Oh, not allsunshine and rainbows by any means, but.
Right, right. The most part.
(04:42):
and. Yeah.
And so I currently am a commodity managerin the semiconductor
industry is what I do.
Wow. Work in, the supply chainarea of that of,
the customers of big semiconductorcompanies that make we make the machines
that make the microchips.
So not necessarilythe microchips themselves.
(05:04):
but in involvedwith that whole supply chain
and do that sort of work on that end.
Wow. Are you an engineer?
I am supply chain is my background.
I just graduated, two weeks agonow, with with my masters, MBA
with a concentration in finance.
(05:25):
Good for you.
Congrats.
Feels good to. Be done with school.
I know, right?
At least for now.
You never know.
There might be.
More. Yes, yes. Yeah.
Never know. Right now.
We're doing a good break, though.
Yeah. Good.
Well, congrats.
Big milestone.
(05:45):
Yes. Yeah.
And I think that, Yeah, there's,there's a lot of different things
that, that I like to like to do.
I'm very active. I love to do, running.
I think we'll probably talk moreabout some of these things, later on,
but I very much enjoy being outdoorsand just very passionate
(06:07):
about sunrises, sunsets,being with people.
So that's kind. Of wherewe're at right now.
That's awesome.
There's lots of those in Austin.
Such a beautiful, beautiful area.
Yes. And I lovethe colors are so vivid there.
It feels like so sunrises and sunsets.
I can imagine there.
(06:28):
Quite beautiful in that. Yeah.
Yeah yeah.
We actually are getting our first.
Fall kind.
Of because usually it just goesstraight from like summer to
winter.
We kind of skip some seasons.
so you're getting the leaveschanging color right now in Austin,
which is very nice.
Wow. Does it get colder?
(06:49):
I mean.
Sometimes we have all the random freezesthat occur every.
Got it. But yeah.
Right now. As much. The degrees.
It's 70 right now.
Yeah.
But wow.
Yeah I mean it's pretty warm.
And Chicago you know compared toother times it's been zero a couple times.
(07:12):
But it has been a pretty mild winter.
Knock on wood. Thankfully.
That was very nice.
I went to Chicago for the first time.
actually twice this year.
I went in a two year time frame.
and then early November, Oh, cool.
Very pretty.
Oh, awesome.
Any plans to come back anytime soon?
(07:34):
Hopefully.
I, I definitely would like to,I was there for the leadership conference,
but it was it was awesome.
And I would I would definitely go back,especially in the fall timeframe.
Real good.
Yeah, I know, it's so pretty though.
The summer is really pretty too.
I actually we talked to Travisabout getting out here, so.
Yeah. Yes.
Yeah. So cool.
(07:55):
So yeah, I mean, I don't know how muchto share to you about what we do in here.
but the goal, you know,my goal in life really is to normalize
our conversation around hopelessness.
the moments of hopelessness we experience.
And, you know,we all experience them all the time
when you break down hopelessnessand what it really is looking at,
(08:17):
you know, emotional despair, you feel bad,angry, afraid, sad,
and then helpless.
you know, that that kind of helplessnesscomponent of doing,
of doing something about itor being able to do anything about it,
and that's really those that combinationof that despair and helplessness
that can really get us into trouble.
(08:38):
And, and so it's about,you know, normalizing the conversation
around it and,and then talking about strategies
for navigating our way through it inboth the small and big challenges of life.
And, you know, when hopelessness becomespersistent, that's when it becomes
clinical anxiety, depression.
That's when, you know, we see suicides,we see things like shootings that happen.
(09:02):
And and you know, if,you know, in my experience,
so many people fear the conversationaround hopelessness and
don't want to talk about it,and that it's that fear that
actually it just makes itworse, makes everything worse.
And so, yeah,so I'm grateful to you for joining today
and being able to share,kind of your own story.
(09:24):
and looking at somethingthat you were challenged with and,
and had a challenge with and learningfrom you on how you navigated
your way through it, just shareand examples of the kind of evidence
based framework that we've created aroundhow what we know kind of gets us to hope.
But again,these skills are different for everyone.
And so by sharing,you know, we help just elevate
(09:46):
the kinds of ways we can get throughthrough these challenges.
So again, thanks for joining today.
And yeah. So what is on your mind?
What would you what are you openand willing to share with us.
Yeah.
so I, I would say that I oftenlook at my life and I'm like,
(10:07):
I feel like I'm constantlyliving in these extremes.
So, like, one minuteI'm on the mountaintop.
I was in Machu Picchu just a week ago.
hiking,the Inca Trail, three nights, four days,
and just dancingon the most majestic view.
And with just peoplefrom all around the world.
(10:29):
and then I look at momentsover the past year where I was, you
know, crying in the kitchenon the floor of my new apartment
that I just moved intothat was cockroach infested,
earlier,then went skydiving earlier this year
and witnessed my sister give birthand got to see the miracle of life.
And then I have these momentsof where I went through,
(10:52):
three car accidents at the beginningof the year, three cars, in one month.
found out I had a hole in my heart.
that was a huge a huge thing for me.
so I look at.
I look at these moments in my lifeof where I was literally
on the mountaintops,just like so much joy.
(11:15):
And then I have these momentswhere I was in just.
Deep.
Despair, like just in the valleys.
And I know thatin with having both, I am.
Like, why?
Why am I always in these extremes?
Like, why is it just so highs and lows,highs and lows?
but I look at it and I'm like,I truly can't,
(11:37):
you can't have one without the other.
And I look at the moments of when I'vebeen on those mountaintops, and I see that
I have so much more appreciationfor those moments,
because I've known what it feels liketo be in the depths of the valleys.
and Ithink, able to remember those moments of
when I am in those valleys of like,hey, this isn't forever.
(12:00):
There is light in the darkness.
And that's somethingthat I always try to remind myself.
but through that, I think thatlife is truly about connection.
And I think that connectionis where hope grows.
And so from a lot of these journeys,and things in my life,
(12:20):
something that has been very,constant for me, that has helped me
find hope is through connection.
And that's with myself, with others and,with the world around me.
so I'm always trying to find opportunitiesto connect with people.
(12:41):
and something that has really givenme hope is I've been on this,
I like to call it my stranger journey.
So it's the ideais that life is truly about connection.
And I think similar to to you.
And your approach with this podcastis that each time you interact
with someone, you can learn something new.
(13:03):
And every time that I meet a new person,I see them as someone that truly can bring
value and I can learn from.
And so I started this thing,I call it rain chats.
It's my stranger journey where Ithe idea is to highlight 365
different people.
(13:23):
and all of these interactions have beensome have been just random,
like, I'll be in lineat a coffee shop and I,
start a conversation with someoneor some have been on the plane,
the people I'm sitting next to.
last year I was fortunate to doa trip around the globe, for my job,
(13:44):
and met a number of peopleall over the world, which has been cool.
But I started an Instagram accountcalled Rain Chats
to kind of just follow along,and share my journey.
I take a picture of the people and Ihave a set of questions that I ask people.
(14:05):
and I think that it's been so cool,Kathryn, just to learn,
learn from peopleand hear their different perspectives.
it gives me hope.
And so I share it then on Instagramjust to amplify that and hope.
and in hopes that other peoplewill be able to see their stories
and get a little bit of hopeand remind themselves that, hey,
(14:29):
we're we're really not alone.
Like, there's so many peoplethat we're going through struggles.
And so, yeah,that's a little bit about me, kind of what
I like to, to really focus on inlife is connection.
Yeah.
That is so cool.
I didn't even know that rain chat.
On Instagram. Yes.
(14:49):
Yeah.
I mean, you know, it's so easy to complainabout things that aren't going
well or that we, you know,we don't have enough friends
or we don't know people or, you know,I see I, I've heard
that from people and it's, it's like howhow can we sell that?
Then what can we do?
And to me that's a perfect exampleof something you can do.
You don't have to know anyone.
(15:10):
You don't have to have any friendsto do this.
Like every day, go and connectwith someone, get their story,
talk to them, ask them questions,learn about them I love that.
Yeah, yeah.
It really, it it.
Kind of started from a few things,but a big thing was, I started it shortly
(15:32):
after I lost my meemaw, and I talkeda little bit about being named after her.
One of my very favorite people,was super close with her
and would talk to herconstantly, and ended up, she passed away.
and one of my favorite things about her,was that she knew no stranger.
(15:52):
Like, we would be, just anywhere.
And she would have the abilityto just dive deep with people and connect.
And I would always look at how she hadthe ability to make people feel like
they were the most important personin the world, and she would walk away.
I could see that she was filled up.
And I would also see that the personthat she was engaged
(16:12):
with, was a lot lighter as well.
And so it was kind ofI started the journey as a tribute to her,
of her passing in me, honoringone of my favorite things about her.
But I also have just it's become thisbeautiful thing
because I think that people are justhave this
(16:33):
desire to connect with peopleand sometimes don't know how to start.
And I have so many peoplethat I'm at 180 people
now is where I'm at my strength.
and some of the people, it'sbeen connections
that I have just in those, in that momentand will stay connected
through Instagram or some peopleI never have interacted with again.
(16:54):
And some have, like now, becomemy very best friends that I talk to daily.
So it's very cool to just see the range.
But each interaction,I would say I've had so much value in it,
and I still have people that will reachback out to me and be like,
hey, like that really inspired meto connect with other people too.
And now I'll start conversationsjust out in the open.
(17:16):
and I think that it, I think often timeswhen I've felt hopeless or very sad,
I try to really go about the approachof connecting with others,
because I think it always makes me feelbetter afterwards.
And I don't know if you've heard the,the saying of
if when you're feeling down,go give massive love to someone else.
(17:38):
and it always just like, makes me feelso much better and like rain.
Just get out of this darknessand, like, go find the light.
Because you can find it like it's there.
And sometimes it's.
A lot harder to find than others.
but light shows upin so many different forms through people,
through sunrises and sunsets or music.
(17:58):
Yeah. Yeah, absolutely.
Yeah.
I know it's easy when we get stuckin our like, no, nobody loves me.
I don't have I don't have thisor that to just get to sit and that.
And it's so importantto stop that train of thought,
that kind of challenge that you know,what our mind does
and come up with a solution.
Like, what can we do?
(18:18):
And like you said, it's it's oftenjust give what you most want
and you then receive it, you know.
So yeah, it's so powerful.
Is there something that happened180 days ago
or whenever this startedthat kind of figured it or prompted it?
I would say really the,the passing of my mama was a big thing
(18:39):
of, of mean is navigating grieffor the first time
and grief just hits people so differentlyand shows up very differently.
but yeah, I think that that was a big,a big thing that that triggered it
just as a tribute to her.
in wanting towanting to amplify the hope,
too, of that's why I share it,on Instagram,
(19:02):
just in hopes that it will inspire others.
to find hopeor to find, connection with others.
so. Yeah.
Yeah. That's awesome. Yeah.
And when you look at hopelessness, though,and often, you know, when we lose someone
that's like, of courseyou're in despair and of course
you're experiencing helplessnessbecause you can't bring that person back.
(19:24):
And so it's like,and I was, you know, when I lost my dad,
I was stuck in a persistent stateand developed clinical depression from it
because it didn't do the thingsthat were healthy to do.
And did,you know, a lot of unhealthy things.
And so we talk about that despair.
So it's, you know, it'ssadness, it's anger, it's fear.
And so losing someoneof course, is going to trigger that.
(19:46):
So how you know, how did you experiencesadness in a healthy way?
What did you do to process the griefto navigate your way through.
Yeah. I would say ahad some unhealthy ways as well of just.
Isolating myself and being very justsad and sitting in my grief.
(20:10):
But I would say some of the big thingswere, exercising.
I started to run, andbeing outside in nature,
I think that is a huge thingof just admiring the creation around me.
I'm especially seeking sunrisesand sunsets, and talking to people.
I think connection waswas the biggest thing that helped me
(20:32):
through that grief and talking to othersthat have experienced it, too.
it just gives you that feelingthat you're not alone.
and it makes it just a lot more manageableand really reframing the grief of.
Of. How beautiful it isthat I get to experience grief,
(20:53):
how I love someone so much that it hurtsthis badly to be without.
And I think of that all the time,of even the highs and lows of life.
It's it givesyou just so much appreciation.
You really can't have onewithout the other.
And I always think of the,the, the quote, for what is grief?
(21:13):
But love endured and you would not knowgrief if you had not known a great love.
And so I think I felt that a lot.
And that gives me a lot of hope.
Yeah, absolutely.
Oh, I know it's so powerful.
It's incredible to have such, you know,deep relationships in life, you know,
and and yet the other side of thatis yeah, everyone passes at some point.
(21:37):
And we've got to navigate thatand we've got to find our way through it.
yeah.
And you talk a bit about,you know, the sadness and the isolation
and you know, that that iswe do that so much when we're in pain
and when we lose someone.
And yet that's really the timewe we need to be connecting.
(21:58):
And it's so challenging to do.
So I think it's like it's a beautifulbalance of, you know, having time alone
to be sad and to honor and expressyour sadness in ways that are healthy,
you know, and like you said,not get stuck in that sadness
kind of cycle in the pit of sadness,and then also finding healthy ways
of connecting through that,you know, in ways that work
(22:20):
and everyone experiencesgrief in different ways, you know,
and it needs to managemanage it in different ways.
And but people do, you know,it is important to have connections
and people through that.
So yeah, it's really important.
And then, you know, we often stop doingthe things that are healthy for us.
So we talk about happiness habits.
And you know, you talk about runninglike it when we go through hard times,
(22:44):
we often stop doing those thingsbecause we're so stuck in our sadness.
And yet when we get overwhelmed withstress hormones, that's when we get sick,
you know?
And so learninghow to cultivate those happiness habits,
and those hormones that we need to,to feel good and engaged and connected in
life is is super important.
(23:06):
So you mentioned runningas and get in in nature.
Are there other things.
Yeah.
dancingI love to I'm not very good at dancing,
but I get stressful meeting,turning on some music and dancing it out.
I think that's such a goodjust stress relief of movement. Yes.
(23:26):
And so I very much valuejust exercise in general.
I grew up always playing sportsand so I'm big on I love playing
soccer and tennis and basketball.
And I've really gotten into doing running.
So I ran my first marathon,this past year.
So that was super awesome.
Yeah.
I, I went to Maine and ran it there.
(23:48):
my, I had two bucket list items.
It was a run, a full marathon.
And see the sunrise in Maine.
because it's like the first spot.
You can see the sunrise in the US.
So. Interesting. Same jump together.
but yeah, Iwould say movement is a huge thing for me.
And I think that was somethingthat really, really shook me
(24:09):
at the beginning of the year.
So I, I mentioned earlier,I found out that I had a hole in my heart.
so at the very beginning of the year,I was in a car
accident, told my carand was going through PT afterwards,
I was struggled with my back and just,overcoming that.
(24:33):
and I had to buy a new carbecause my last car was totaled,
so I bought a new car.
most people have, you know, a new carfor, like, at least a year,
before they wreck it.
But I had mine for two weeks, and,yeah, I.
Had my new car, and I had was justwent to go get my annual physical done,
(24:56):
and they checked me out,and they like rain.
Did you know you have a heart murmur?
And I was like,no, I've never been told that.
And they're like, nothing to be concernedabout, but we want to look into it.
so soanyway, that same day I was in my car
and I like,I think I was just overwhelmed
by everything.
I was on a meetingand had just found out about this
(25:17):
and just a little bit kind of shaken up.
But I was in a parking spot.
Katherine and I back up and I.
I, my car hit a fire.
Hydrant and took the entire front.
Off of the vehicle.
Oh my gosh.
And I sat there.
And I just cried for an hourlike I was supposed
(25:39):
to go back into the officeand, like, had all these meetings and.
I just.
Couldn't. I was so overwhelmed.
And I, I would say that was a.
Moment of hopelessness.
Yeah, it's. Totally.
It's like no brand new car here.
so then, Shortlyafter that, that car was in the shop
and I was borrowing my sister's old car,and I had a lot of other appointments,
(26:04):
to go through, about my heart.
In a few weeks pass,and they told me that they
they found, a hole in,between my upper chambers of my heart,
and made my whole heart quote,like, enlarged,
because of the extra blood flow.
and so that same day,I was driving my sister's car back
(26:28):
from that appointment of finding that out,and I think
I was just kind of all over the placeagain.
And, all of a sudden the car is like,not going past 20mph on the highway.
And I'm like.
Oh my gosh, what's going on?
So it broke down.
On the.
Highway and I was running for four.
Hours. So Ijust so I went through,
(26:51):
three cars in the span of one month.
Oh my gosh.
But yeah, and.
Just went througha bunch of different, tests.
And I think finding out about the holein my heart was, was super scary for me.
One of just I am big on exercising,and one thing that is huge on
(27:12):
my mental health is movement.
And having that fear of of losingthat in some cases.
I had to wear a heart monitor for,a while, and I had a live phone
that was monitoring me.
I was going through, just abunch of overwhelming,
(27:35):
in and out of the hospitaland those sort of things.
And I think I didn't want to accept thatit was real.
I think I kind of, a lot of timesI suppress it and be like, okay,
if I don't think about it, it's not.
It's not a thing. Yeah.
But what I tried to really shiftmy focus was on things
that I could control,and I didn't want to give up movement.
(28:00):
So I did thingsthat I could still control.
and I didn't let it hold me back.
Kathryn, even though I knew that,that this was a thing, I ran my first.
I ran two half marathons this year.
I ran my first full marathon.
I ran my first,I did my first century bike ride.
(28:21):
So, 100 mile bike ride.
yeah. Wow.
Olympic triathlons.
so I was.
Trying not to let those things, hold me.
Back. Yeah.
Yeah, I'm assuming with, like, doctorapproval and healthy ways.
I guess for the most part.
(28:43):
Yeah, maybe this varies a little bit, but,But, yes,
you're in taking care of yourself.
Yeah. Being smart.
Yeah. Good.
I know, I mean, it's so important.
Like when we are,you know, if you break a leg,
I mean, you know, I blew my knee up.
You got to exercise in a different way.
You've got, like, I've got to exercise.
(29:04):
Movement is so critical for me too.
And so it's like I had to get creativeabout how I did that.
I mean, even, you know, moving my armsor doing weights, like with,
you know, just anything, you know,super important and building ourselves
back up to the best of our abilityto, you know, that we can, yeah.
(29:24):
That's amazing. That's that's.
So good.
How do you set goals?
So when you take,you know, when you're like,
I'm going to do it, how do you do it?
So I mean, that's a good question.
I love setting goals.
I'm constantly,writing out things
that I want to want to accomplish.
and I do them, so,for example, this year
(29:44):
I wanted to run the full marathon.
So I wrote that out, and I have Isay I write it out as my adventure
list. for.
Nice. Yes, I love it.
I'm very much like pen and paper.
I love checking, taking it all. Yeah.
Friday, I got to check one off.
I had bought a new car,and my goal was to pay it off in a year,
(30:06):
and so I paid it off on Friday,so I got to do that.
Oh my gosh, that's awesome.
Congrats. Thank you.
say. Having them written outis like huge for me in my goal setting.
And I love being able to,share it also with others.
And I like to ask my friendswhat goals are you working on?
And, have them hold me accountable.
(30:28):
And if there's anything we can dotogether, do those.
Like, for example, the marathonI did in Maine,
I did it was one of my best friendsfrom middle school.
and we ran that together.
So that was really fun.
That is so awesome.
You're just like a living,shining example of hope.
That's so good.
That's what we know about goals,you know, goal hope is a lot about goals.
(30:50):
Like what do you hope forand like can you get there and
and writing down your goalsand checking in with someone regularly.
You're like up to 95% more likelyto achieve, if you do those two things
and you know, you're not necessarily like,did you learn that in school?
Where did you, you know.
Question I don't know.
I've always been very mucha visual person.
(31:15):
So I like to. Have.
I always have my, planner and I'm like,okay, this is what I'm doing in the day,
maybe sometimes a little excessivelyif like, I like to open and, like,
relook at my goal and like,what goal can I check out some like,
oh, I have skydiving on here.
Okay, I'm going to do it this weekend.
Like, I mean look at likelike oh I. To go to Machu Picchu okay.
I went last week and likesome of those things.
(31:38):
But I think that was another huge thingthat I have just
learned over the past.
I think with discovering the holein my heart,
it kind of made me understandjust my mortality.
You know, if it's just too shortnot to make the most
of every single moment,of every connection of every day.
(32:03):
And so I always want to make sure I'mmaking the most of every single day.
And that was a big thing of my list.
And like, okay,I have this bucket list. Like, why?
and things I want to do, I'm like,what's what's stopping me?
Why not just do them right? Right.
A little abouthow many things do you have on it?
(32:24):
you know, I don't know, I think I.
I haveI don't know the exact count now,
but I had at 1.100 things, and,so, I learned this from,
a very good mentor of mine.
so I have my, like, adventure list,and then after I do things,
(32:44):
I move it to my smile fileso I can go back and reflect on.
And, like, like, brings me joy.
Yeah.
Yeah, I love that. My smile. Smile.
Good one. Nice.
That's awesome.
And I think.
Having goalsand things to look forward to,
I think that is a huge thing for me.
(33:07):
especially if I'm in momentsof feeling down or having a hard time.
I'm like, okay, what?
Is there something that I can plan?
Is there a trip?
Is there somethingthat I can sign up to do?
Is there a cooking class I can take?
What is somethingthat's been on your list that I can,
go and plan?
I know that's the huge thing for meis having something to look forward to.
(33:28):
And absolutely that's that's key to hope.
So yeah, when you're feeling down.
But think about exactly just that.
Like what can I do in the future futureoriented that I could look forward to
and that I could work towardsand take steps towards and and
yeah, so, so important.
you know, the E and R shine is eliminatingchallenges which are thinking
(33:52):
patterns or negative thought patterns thatget in the way of our ability to hope.
So thing is like ruminationwhen we internalize failures.
So like we fail at somethingand then we're like, I'm a failure.
I'm horrible at everything.
You know, I suck.
things like worrying about the future.
You mentioned controlling things outsideof your control, like trying to do that.
(34:14):
We we try to do that all the time,and that leads to hopelessness.
You know, things like,let's see, attaching to outcomes
is a big onewhen we get really attached to our goals.
Like for attach to that specific goal,it doesn't work.
We can of course,we're going to get into that despair
and helplessness kind of cycle.
(34:36):
So what are confirmation bias.
Negative biasor like so many things that our brain does
that just kind of works against us for,you know, everything we hope for.
So do you have any of those challenges?
Do you.
Care?
Yes, absolutely. Yes.
I would say one of my biggest,A lot of those resonated with me.
(35:00):
But one of my biggestis that I am often a perfectionist.
So and I,I very much tend to be a people pleaser.
So that is somethingthat I am continuing to overcome.
that, but whenI care a lot about
(35:21):
often others opinions and recentlyI let someone's opinion.
Be way too loud in my head.
and way.
Too much space and cause a lot of doubt,in my ability had me questioning myself.
And I think that,caused me to to ruminate, quite a bit
(35:45):
and go into a little bit of depressionat times of like, thinking.
I really started to believewhat they said about me.
And so, yeah, I would say thatthat's something
that I definitely struggle with.
but learning to overcome.
yeah.
Yeah.
And what do you do to navigate it?
(36:08):
Yeah. That's it.
I would say one of the biggest thingsis stepping into something new.
so oftentimes either.
Like trying something newor removing myself from the situation,
(36:29):
I think a big thing as well isI feel very fortunate that
I have a lot of great people in my life.
I have some incredible mentors.
So, like,calling my board of advisors, I'm.
Sure you've heard that term or.
Yeah, but people that.
That very much support me in that I,that I value their opinions and thoughts.
(36:53):
And so I'll, go to some of them,and just try to work through like,
hey, what is it that I could bedoing differently and have them help
support me to do, that differentlyor to just have them speak
words of encourage?
Oftentimes,I think that it takes someone else
believing in youfor you to believe in yourself.
(37:15):
And I feel so fortunatethat I have people in my life
that oftentimes, would believe in memore than I believed in myself.
And that was huge.
I think they don't even knowthe impact that they've had on me.
and even justjust strangers in some cases of
(37:36):
kindness and where people are,I've been so down or sad
and just people showed melittle glimmers of light.
that meant more than they would ever know.
I look at.
Those moments, and it makes mejust want to always make sure
I'm giving that to other people as well.
(37:58):
It's like I realize how much that meantto me,
those little things and like,took me out of dark times.
so I want to be able to do that for othersas well.
Yeah, yeah.
Every interaction we have matters.
You know so much.
We have no idea what other peopleare going through or what
(38:18):
they're experiencingand how meaningful full a deep like a deep
look into someone's eyes and a smileand a, you know, kind of connection.
And like you said, strangers.
And I think it's so beautifulthat you're doing that,
with yourInstagram and, and, 180
and it'll be 1000 someday, I'm sure.
(38:41):
It's so cool to think aboutjust all the connections
you know, you'll be makingthroughout your life as you do those.
That's so cool.
yeah.
And you talked about,like, the perfection is.
I mean, one thing I think is fascinatingabout our brain and one of the things
our brain does, it'sgot this negative bias.
So, you know, 100 people could be sayingkind of loving,
(39:02):
affirming things to us about how amazingand how good we are at this
or why we have value andand our brain will listen
to that one that says something negative.
You know, it'sjust that's how our brain is wired.
And then it'll like get ruminateon that negative thing.
(39:23):
And it just it does.
It has the powerto just take over our whole brain.
And then that can be our.
Yeah.
And it's kind of amazing that it doesthat.
And to me, I think just even knowing thatfact that our brain does that and it's
just a tendency and it's an old thingthat used to help us like
look for threats in our environmentand keep us safe,
(39:46):
but that it's an old, outdated mechanismin our brain that we just really have
to kind of retrain to go back tothose things that are positive and that.
So, you know, I never I didn't like the,the word of for affirmations.
I just thought they're crazy.
And yet I find they're so valuableand so important.
And when I start to hearany of the negative things
(40:09):
louder that I'm thinking of,the positive things that I bring,
those affirmations into my lifeand say them
and repeat them so that, you know,as you do that, you take that focus,
that tendency of your brainto focus on that negative kind of chatter.
And, you know,it can just take the steering wheel and go
(40:31):
and just drive youinto this pit of despair,
you know,and it's horrible that it does that.
so it's really important andit's really just about being intentional.
And, you know,so much of what other people say about us
is based on their own experiencesand their own baggage
and their own,you know, projecting oftentimes.
(40:53):
And so kind of becoming aware of that and,and have having compassion
for those people and also, you know,having healthy boundaries around it.
And, you know,you talk about the importance of network.
And it's really, you know, it'snot the quality of our network.
It's really the quality.
And like, are they healthy for us?
(41:13):
Are they helping us movetowards our goals, or are they kind of
getting in the wayand holding us back or keeping us down?
And it's important to kind of identifythat and reflect on that.
Absolutely.
Yeah. And I think walking. Into youor they,
making you feel like you're pouringfrom an empty cup sort of thing they take.
Yeah, yeah.
(41:34):
Absolutely, absolutely.
Well, so how are youand how is your heart these days?
It feels warm.
Full these net. Yes.
yeah.
So right now I got, cleared to livethis beautiful thing called life.
and. Yeah, just something toto monitor over time.
(41:56):
they said that at this point,it would do more damage to go in
and do surgery to correct it.
So just living with this, this holeand filling it with,
All the good thingslife has to offer, all the.
Things I love it.
Yeah. That's amazing.
Oh, good for you.
Good for you. So what's next on your list?
(42:22):
I would say that.
The. Machu Picchu and pain of the carwere huge ones and skydiving.
And I added five new states,this past year.
I'm trying to get all 50 states.
is is kind of on the plan,but next, going to Africa next year.
(42:43):
so, whereabouts?
Yoga?
Wellness? 749. Yeah.
Oh, really super excited about that.
Yeah. And.
but yeah, this is the time of yearthat I'm going to rewrite out my goals.
Yeah, sort of next year.
So I'm excited about that.
so I haven't spent as much time,doing that at this time, but,
(43:07):
with finishing school, I actually justbeen, switched jobs,
This month, Month agoso that the past,
my past role for six years.
And now I just joined a new company.
But, yeah.
I feel like there's,a lot of great opportunity ahead.
(43:27):
yeah. Yeah.
One of the really cool thingsthat you brought up about hope
throughout all of this is, you know,hope is one of
the only things Dan Tomasello wrote Learnhopefulness.
He's kind of one of my advisors,as you said.
And next words, he, talks abouthope is the one thing
that you need the negativeto kind of get to the positive,
(43:52):
you know,so it's like having that contrast.
And if we can start to embracethat contrast, because it really gives us
insight into what we care about,what's important to us, what
how the how that, you know, angerthat's like how deeply we feel,
we can use that to propel usto what we aspire to,
(44:15):
what we seek, what what we hope for,and give us some momentum to get there.
And I think that's a, you know,you put it so beautifully.
I think in, in, you know, the hillsand the valleys and, you know,
it is like you do have those momentswhere you're
just like in a heap on the floor,like, I can't can I can I navigate,
can I get through this?
(44:36):
And then you are like on the top,like looking over Machu Picchu going,
oh my God, what an absolutely amazing,extraordinary place.
This is, you know, and that's it'svery like that's what life is.
So, you know, I believe and and Dan saysit's the hope is rare in that in that
you know it it takes really both sides.
(44:59):
so that's really, really coolthat you, you knew that already.
So learning. Yeah. Yeah.
Right. Exactly. It's a process.
It's just a matter of rememberingwhen we're on the in a heap on the floor
that, you know, there is that other sideand we can get there.
And it takes work on our part, you know,and it sounds like you're doing the things
(45:20):
to do the work, you know,which is also another important
kind of part of hope is we it's, you know,our hope is up to us really.
You know, connectionsfuel it absolutely for sure.
And yet we've got to do the workto make the connections or,
you know, to to get out of our despairand get back to feeling better
(45:42):
and and to get out of our helplessnessand take action where we can.
And so, you know, and it's I believe it'slike a muscle and you have to build it.
You have to learnkind of how to hope, you know,
how to get good at hope the process.
So yeah.
Is there anything else you want to sharewith our listeners again,
your Instagram so we can it is.
(46:04):
Rain chats R A Y and Eand then chats if you want to follow
along on the journey.
so with a y and I love it rain. Yes.
Well I any rain chats on Instagramso super cool.
So you can see all of the strangersor people that rain is meeting all over
(46:26):
and maybe be inspired to start your own,or to start having conversations
with strangers.
Because I do agree with you.
Everyone has something to teach us.
Every single person on this planethas something
to teach us, and it's up to usto kind of discover that.
So yeah. Awesome.
Any final, final thoughts or wordsthat you want to share?
(46:48):
Yeah, I just want to thank youjust for for everything that you do.
I think that when I first, heard from youand heard about what your mission is,
I got just so excited about it, Catherine,because I've just
I've especially in,just sometimes in my industry that I'm in,
I've had people that thathave really reiterated to me
(47:09):
that hope is not a business model.
And I struggle with that because I am avery hopeful person and finding you and.
Your. Work.
I was like,this is exactly what I believe in.
And like, I just love what you're sharingand how you have all of the research
and the things that back it, I think issuch a powerful, just message to people.
(47:34):
And I'm like, I just want to telleveryone, listen to this.
Like is real.
And it is measurableand you need hope in your life.
I think that without hope, it's,it's not necessarily
a life worth living like.
It's it's hard to live without hope.
So I just want to thank you so muchfor just the message that you share
and the light that you are to others.
(47:57):
Oh thank you. That's so kind.
I really appreciate that.
Yeah, there's a famous business book.
Hope is not a strategy,which works against me
doing work in the business world.
And yet I have an MBA as well.
And I'm a very,you know, I'm a strategist by nature,
and I think hope is the most important,important strategy
(48:18):
in the workplace when you look atand it's a top four need of employees.
So it's super important.
So I'm glad to hear thatyou're spread the message.
Yeah, it is measurable.
And you know,if you measure your hope in the workplace,
it's going to tell you so muchabout your workplace outcomes.
And when you think about hope, it'sall about goals.
So and workplaces are really builton goals and attaining goals
(48:39):
and overcoming obstacles to goals.
So yeah.
Different than a vision. Yes.
Yeah. Exactly. Exactly.
That'sI mean that's really my definition of hope
is it's a visionfor something in your future
and you fuel it with positive feelingsand then inspired actions.
You know that. Yeah.
(49:00):
So awesome.
So if your workplace ever needs,you know, some
someone to come do some work with themand hope I'm more than happy.
I love I love talking to workespecially, you know, engineers and, and
and the more manufacturing typeof the more and a little,
you know, folks so getting themand understanding your perspective.
(49:25):
Yeah, exactly.
And then an understandingof how feelings like fuel that as well
and can either support usor get in the way of our ability to hope.
Super important.
yeah. Awesome.
So thank you for bringing that up andand for honoring my work, I appreciate it.
It's not it's not been an easy journeyto hope, that's for sure.
(49:45):
There's, you know,investing in in a preventative protective
factors oftennot something we do as a society.
And yet we're,we're we're making that turn.
So I'm super grateful.
And a lot of work on hoped to come.
So I'm looking forwardto seeing connected with you.
And I thank you for sharing your storyand your experience and your strategies
(50:08):
for Hope. Really helpful.
I learned a lot and I'm super grateful.
And to all the listeners for listeningand thank you so much.
you know, wewe aim to educate and inspire here.
So, thinking that hopefullyyou got some good stuff out of this.
And, we thank you for listening in.
(50:28):
And if someone says so inspired,please do share this with others.
And rain, thanks again.
Have a wonderful day.
And as we say,keep shining, keep shining. Hope.
Thanks a lot.
Thank you all for listening into the Hope Matrix podcast.
We want to shine a lightthat hope is teachable.
Hope is measurable and teachableand provide you with actionable insights
(50:52):
for how you can start activatinghope in your life today
and provide a framework so you can starttalking about hope with other people
and practice these skills togetherbecause we are better with hope.
Please feel free to check outtheshinehopecompany.com, where we list
all of our resources around how to Hope.
We have a lot of free programsfor how to hope, including the five day
(51:15):
Challenge, our Hope infographicwith a lot of skills
that showcase how to hope and articlesof how to incorporate hope in your life.
We have The Hopebeat Weekly,which is a weekly newsletter
that shares strategies for hope.
We have a My Hope Story templates soyou can write your own Hope story today.
Also my Hope Hero so we can sharewhat our heroes are doing to activate
(51:39):
hope in their lives.
And this is especially good with youthso they can start looking up
to people that have overcome similaror challenges to them
and seen how these heroes use the ShineHope framework.
We have a Hopeful Minds for Teens programand Hopeful minds Overview
Educator Guides.
We have a new evidencebased college course so you can activate
(52:00):
Hope on the college campus.
There are programs in the workplace.
Overview courses 90 minute coursesfor learning the what,
why and how to hope.
What I want you to know about hopeis it's a skill.
You've got to practice these skillsto become hopeful.
It's easyto fall into despair and helplessness
when we deal with challenges in life,and it takes intentional work
(52:23):
and practice to get to hope.
And yet it is always possible.
So no matter what life brings.
Keep shining hope.
Thanks so much for listeningand have an awesome day.
And of course, I’ve got to add this, thatthis program is designed to assist you
in learning about hope should not be usedfor medical advice, counseling,
(52:44):
or other health related services.
iFred, The Shine Hope Company and myself,Kathryn Goetzke
do not endorse or provide any medicaladvice, diagnosis or treatment.
I am not a medical doctor.
The information provided hereshould not be used for the diagnosis
or treatment of any medical conditionand cannot be substituted
(53:05):
for the advice of physicians, licenseprofessionals or therapists
who are familiarwith your specific situation.
Consulta licensed medical profession or call 911.
If you are in need of immediate assistanceand be sure to know the crisis Hotline.
988. If you are in need of support.
(53:26):
Thanks so much for listening.
Take good care of yourselfand keep shining hope.
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