August 25, 2025 • 43 mins
What gives meaning to your life when faced with loss and challenge? For Andriana Ubuduki-Kalfa, the answer emerged at her mother's funeral when a Japanese friend approached her about meeting her daughter, saying simply: "she was your mother's ikigai."
This profound moment transformed Andriana's understanding of ikigai beyond the familiar Western interpretation of four overlapping circles. As a Japanese-Greek performance coach with over 30 years of experience bridging cultural differences, Andriana discovered that ikigai can be found in the simplest pleasures—a morning coffee, a dog's greeting—or in profound connections to people and places that sustain us through life's darkest moments.
Our conversation explores how Andriana blends the Greek love of dialogue (rooted in the Socratic method) with Japanese concepts like mindfulness, kaizen, and kokorozashi (warrior spirit) to help Olympic athletes and executives achieve remarkable results. She shares moving personal stories, including how visualizing a small harbor in the Greek islands became her mental "resting port" during a serious health challenge, carrying her through surgery and recovery with hope and purpose.
Most powerfully, Andriana reveals how reconnecting with our inner child leads us back to our authentic selves—"where real clarity lives." By approaching life with shoshin (beginner's mind) and kokishin (curiosity), we create space for deep observation and reconnection with what truly matters.
Whether you're seeking better performance, deeper meaning, or simply a fresh perspective on life's challenges, this conversation offers wisdom that bridges Eastern and Western traditions in surprisingly practical ways. The insights shared might just help you discover your own ikigai—that special something that makes your life worth living each day.
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
To me, Ikigai can be almost anything like little or
big, Something that gives valueto our living, that fuels us to
keep going with kokorozasi, withthe heart of warrior,
especially when life isn't easy.
Speaker 2 (00:32):
My guest today on the Ikigai podcast is Andriana
Ubuduki-Kalfa, an Ikigai coachspecializing in performance,
executive and personalexcellence coaching.
As a Japanese-Greek performancecoach with over 30 years of
experience bridging culturaldifferences between Greece and
Japan in business environments,andriana has developed an
approach that blends traditionalJapanese wisdom with modern
(00:53):
coaching methodologies tominimize stress, enhance
performance and support personaldevelopment.
She has helped Olympic athletesachieve goals and works with
heart to support people live ahappy, balanced and meaningful
life.
It's wonderful to see you today.
Thank you for joining me.
Speaker 1 (01:14):
Thank you so much.
Thank you so much, nicholas.
It's lovely to be here with you.
I feel truly honored for havingthis opportunity to discuss
with you over topics that are soclose to both of our hearts.
And can I be bold enough tostart with a little correction,
of course?
Well, it's not to you.
(01:37):
It's not to you, it's to myself.
You introduced me as an Ikigaicoach and thank you very much
for that.
It's a title I gave myself manyyears ago, because living with
my little Ikigai felt someaningful and I wanted to share
that with my people.
But now that I have encounteredyou, nicolas, and your
(02:01):
beautiful Ikigai coachingprogram, I decided to set my
self-appointed title aside inorder to properly claim it after
completing your course.
No, I saw you, you're laughing.
But you've brought together allthese authors, all these
researchers Okay, some of them Ihad been reading as well and
(02:25):
you have created suchcoach-friendly tools.
I feel like I finally have anally in this space.
You know and I felt that evenbefore knowing you personally,
and I'm ready to jump in.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
Thank you.
Now we've had a few callstogether and you were also on
one of my webinars.
As I said or wrote to you, Ithink you have this beautiful
wisdom and knowledge in you.
You love both of your cultures.
So certainly by experience lifeexperience I think you're an
(03:00):
Ikigai coach.
I think you give Ikigai a lotof depth, wisdom, beauty, all
these things.
So you don't need anycertification or any
qualification at all, especiallyfrom me.
We're allies, I agree, so frameit like that.
So let's move on.
(03:23):
Would you like to talk aboutyour japanese and greek heritage
?
Speaker 1 (03:29):
yes, of course I'd love to and you.
You use this in your coaching,so let's start there, okay well,
thanks to my greek heritage, Ibring the love of dialogue.
You know it's a Greek word,dialogos dialogue and I'm
excited by the fact thatcoaching essentially has deep
(03:52):
roots in the ancient GreekMeptic method of Socrates, also
known as the Socratic method orSocratic method of meftics comes
from the Greek word meftikos,which means midwifery.
Socrates likened his method ofasking questions to the word of
(04:13):
a midwife not giving birthhimself, of course, but helping
others to give birth to theirown insights, to their own ideas
, to their own wisdom.
And that's what coaching is allabout, isn't it, Nick?
We are trained to mainly askthe right questions in order for
(04:35):
our people to really discoverthemselves, their true selves,
their values, their way togrowth.
It's one of them, in their ownunique way.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
It's kind of perfect, isn't it, to have this Greek
heritage.
And, as you mentioned, coachingis almost easy.
You just have to ask questionsand create space.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
It's a privilege.
Speaker 2 (05:03):
So let's move on to your Japanese heritage and how
that helps you with coaching.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
On my Japanese side, I've always been drawn to
methodologies influenced by theJapanese culture, such as
practicing like yourself, suchas practicing mindfulness, flow,
kaizen and, of course, theauthentic principles of Ikigai,
and these values shape how Idesign my coaching services and
(05:32):
how I help people find clarityin their either personal or
professional lives.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Nice, and I know you've studied in Japan, so you
studied at Sophia University inJapan.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
Yes, I had the privilege of studying there as a
European Union Scholar in Japanfor executives back in the
2000s.
During that period of time Iwas already working for a
special program of the GreekMinistry of National Economy to
promote Hellenic-Japanesebusiness collaboration.
Speaker 2 (06:09):
All right, and what did you study at Sofia
University?
Speaker 1 (06:14):
During those studies in Tokyo, we were 37
professionals from all overEurope studying the differences
between European and Japanesebusiness culture, a program
created by Sofia University forthe European Union.
Speaker 2 (06:35):
And how was that for you to go and study in Japan?
It must have been wonderful.
Speaker 1 (06:41):
It was wonderful because it was a combination of
37 people from all over Europestudying the same subject and
the differences, and also I hadthe chance to study about the
Greek business culture when Iwas in Japan, so that was
interesting as well.
Speaker 2 (07:00):
And so that is Hellenic, is that right?
Speaker 1 (07:03):
Hellenic, it means Greek.
Yes, it's another word.
It's more official, theHellenic.
Is that right?
Hellenic, it means Greek.
Yes, it's another word.
It's more official, theHellenic yes.
Speaker 2 (07:10):
Okay, exciting, and so I'll ask you a question, only
because I think you know why.
But did you ever take classesor meet Professor Haruhiko
Tanaka?
He was a guest on my podcast,episode 62.
Speaker 1 (07:29):
Oh well, I don't believe I had the pleasure and
forgive me if I'm wrong,professor, but I'm aware of his
research on Ibasho, a term I usein my daily Japanese, and I'm
looking forward to studying moreabout it.
And you know, I will take thisopportunity, nicole, and say
(07:52):
that I'm always at my e-bashowwhen I'm communicating with you.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
Well, thank you.
Yeah, you sent that in an emailand you've said that now and I
feel the same, so it's a realjoy.
I feel safe, comfortable, thecommunication is easy and I
always look forward to talkingto you, so it gives me something
to look forward to.
Speaker 1 (08:16):
Yes, and you understand my Greek-Japanese
pronunciation.
It's amazing, that's lovely.
Speaker 2 (08:24):
Your pronunciation is lovely.
You've got this heritage.
You're leveraging both yourgreek heritage and your japanese
heritage, both, I think, in theway you live your life, but
also in coaching.
So in business, I think it'sopened up a lot of opportunity
for you.
So today you also offerconsulting to individuals and
(08:48):
businesses involved in tourism,exports, trade and investment
related to Japan.
So what kind of advice do youprovide?
Speaker 1 (09:29):
Well, this is something I've been practicing
since the early 90s Now you knowmy age through various roles.
Back then I worked on a specialprogram initiated by the Greek
Ministry of National Economy topromote the collaboration across
sectors, from economicdevelopment to cultural exchange
(09:52):
, across sectors, from economicdevelopment to cultural exchange
, and since then I'vecontributed to several
organizations in fields such astourism, media, exports.
For example, I worked as aresearcher for Yomiuri Shimbun I
think you know the Japanesenewspaper that the paper sold
over 10 million copies per dayat that time and I was working
(10:15):
for them during the OlympicGames in Athens, before and
after, and I had the role oftheir researcher here in Athens
for more than two years.
But these days I still offer mycounseling services, but
primarily on an educationallevel.
So I'm supporting executives,I'm supporting organisations,
(10:38):
companies, in understanding thecultural differences between
Greece and Japan beforetravelling to Japan or
collaborating with our Japanesecounterparts.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
All right, so you've had a history of consulting.
How long have you been coaching?
Speaker 1 (10:56):
Since 2017.
Speaker 2 (11:00):
Okay, nice, and you sound like you've been getting
really good results, so we'lltalk about that a little bit
later.
But you are here on thispodcast for a number of reasons,
but one is obviously related toIkigai.
So would you mind sharing thetouching story of what a friend
(11:21):
of your mother's told you atyour mother's funeral?
Speaker 1 (11:27):
Okay, yes, nicholas, of course, if it's not too heavy
for the podcast, it'll be fine.
Speaker 2 (11:31):
Okay, it's also a story of course, if it's not too
heavy for the podcast, it'll befine.
Speaker 1 (11:33):
Okay, it's also a story of meaning, and it's the
answer to why I reached for you,isn't it?
Speaker 2 (11:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
Five years ago, we lost our mother to a sudden
stroke At 74, she was so healthythat when she was declared
brain dead, like within hours,they asked if she could be an
organ donor.
And that was not a difficultdecision for the family to make,
(12:03):
as her ikigais were alwaysrelated to serving people,
providing connecting Greece withJapan.
One example is that she lovedteaching Greeks the Japanese
language and especially theJapanese culture, like the tea
ceremony.
She was a master of teaceremony and it was through her
(12:27):
Ikigai that we knew her valuesand she saved more than 10
people with this donation.
Speaker 2 (12:36):
Wow, 10 people.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
Yes, and please note that this is the first time ever
that I'm talking about thispublicly.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
All right, well, thank you for sharing that on my
podcast.
I really appreciate it.
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (12:52):
Thank you for making room.
Her funeral took place on awarm December day in Athens.
We were surrounded by friends.
We were surrounded by herstudents, family, and a Japanese
friend of hers approached meand said Hi son, can I meet your
daughter?
Actually, in Japanese, shementioned her name and she went
(13:17):
like so I looked around to findmy daughter and she added
suddenly, I want to meet herebecause she was your mother's
ikigai, nick.
That sentence changed somethingin me Because up to that moment
(13:41):
, I had not accepted but I wasokay with the Western
interpretation of Ikigai, youknow the one frame with the
context of work, productivityand the four colorful, beautiful
circles.
But this was different.
It has changed something.
And my daughter wasn'tsomething that the world needed,
(14:03):
she was not something that mymother could be paid for, and
yet a woman was there describingmy daughter as someone's ikigai
.
It was then that I decided toresearch the term more,
describing my daughter assomeone's ikigai.
It was then that I decided toresearch the term more and that
(14:25):
research became my personalikigai.
And at the same time, this newikigai of mine served me in
healing from my loss I'm sorryif I'm getting a little bit
emotional, you understand.
And during that journey, amongthe works of Professors Camilla,
professor Mogi, professorHasegawa, I discovered you,
(14:46):
nicholas.
Speaker 2 (14:48):
I'm very happy you did and I'm about to tear up I'm
so lucky to have you here andhave this conversation.
So, thank you, Please thankyour mother's friend for asking
you that question.
I will.
It brought us together, yeah,so it is an amazing word and it
(15:11):
has this special meaning and itcan be quite emotional.
Speaker 1 (15:15):
Thank you, Wiping away tears here meaning, and it
can be quite anything likelittle or big, something that
(15:41):
gives value to our living, thatfuels us to keep going with
kokorozasi, with the heart ofwarrior, especially when life
isn't easy.
And even this podcast became alittle eggy cry for me when you
initially proposed it, nicholas,as something meaningful in the
(16:03):
future I looked forward to.
It gave me energy through avery demanding period without
burnout, and it became a restingport in my mind.
And thank you for waiting forme.
Thank you so much.
Speaker 2 (16:19):
Not at all.
I mean, I was looking forwardto it too, and I knew you'd been
going through a few things.
And yeah, you mentioned theword kokorozashi, so that's
right here.
So that's one of my favoritewords too.
So we seem to love the samewords.
Yeah, the same Japanese words.
Speaker 1 (16:37):
It's amazing, amazing .
Speaker 2 (16:40):
We have some connection, maybe from the past
or something In the same way.
So how does Ikigai help you inyour daily life?
When you're busy, you have allthese challenges.
You're quite ambitious and youknow you have a family, all
these things.
So how does it help you in yourdaily life?
Speaker 1 (17:03):
okay, is it okay to explain with another example?
absolutely so the last months,as you know, we're very full
thank Lots of coaching, lots oftraveling, traveling with my
daughter as well, for karatecompetitions for her.
And in the middle of it, Ireceived your Ikigai course, and
(17:27):
you might have wondered why Ididn't dive in immediately.
Because I was so eager.
Because I was so eager, butfrom the moment I received it,
the course itself became myprecious ikigai and I decided to
(17:48):
give it space.
You know, I didn't want to rushthrough it.
I wanted to enter what I callmy serious study mode, with
intention, calm, respect, andyou you Nicholas understood
exactly what I meant when Iexplained this and that made me
(18:09):
feel so safe and so seen andthat future me picture studying,
being calm, relaxed andenjoying your program has become
one of my ikigais at thismoment.
Speaker 2 (18:28):
Well, thank you, and it was a gift I wanted you to
have and, of course, you can useit whenever you want and I
appreciate that you didn't wantto rush through it or just do it
because I'm worried about whatNick might think that yeah you,
obviously you care aboutlearning and creating space and
(18:50):
time.
So that actually reminds me ofthis idea of utori having space
and room.
Speaker 1 (18:59):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (19:00):
Even when we want to do something, sometimes we need
to stop and just do nothingbecause we have so much going on
, so much stimuli, so muchpressure, so many connections
now.
So, yeah, to have something tolook forward to can be very
helpful.
So that's definitely one way tothink about it.
(19:21):
What's something you're lookingforward to doing?
So I appreciate that that'svery, very special.
Something I'm looking forwardto is one day getting to Greece
or maybe to Japan and meetingyou.
Speaker 1 (19:36):
I think that might be happening soon.
Speaker 2 (19:40):
I hope so.
Yeah, all right, let's talkabout your work, and on your
website you have a number ofways to describe Ikigai, so
let's touch on them, because Ithink it would be very helpful
for our listeners to see allthese different perspectives.
Speaker 1 (20:02):
Okay, yes, ikigai can be a lot of things, of course.
You know that.
It can be something that givesmeaning to our mornings, a
simple thing as a Freddocappuccino.
I'm Greek, you knowMediterranean, we have Fredo
cappuccino.
I'm Greek, you knowMediterranean, we have Fredo
cappuccinos.
And one day we will enjoy onetogether here in Greece.
Speaker 2 (20:25):
Looking forward to it .
Speaker 1 (20:27):
Ikigai can be our family members, a person as we
described before, like mydaughter, my son, my mother, my
cousin.
It can be a loved one, myspouse, my lover.
It can be something that simplybrings a smile to our face,
like someone told me my dog'sgreeting when I come home.
(20:51):
A personal passion we'd pursue,even if no one asked us to
Piano, swimming, writing,dancing, you know, as a path to
flow.
It can be a source of purpose,a role we have in a community
(21:12):
volunteering at the local animalshelter, offering mentoring to
young people, something thatcontributes to our sense of
fulfillment.
Training for a race, not to win,necessarily, but to challenge
myself and see what I'm capableof, seeing the impact of my work
(21:32):
and knowing it helps someone,even in a small way.
By the way, nicholas, I'mwaiting.
I have ordered your book andsmall way.
By the way, nicholas, I'mwaiting.
I have ordered your book andit's on the way.
Thank you and uh.
For me personally, ikigai'sharbor is a place of emotional
rest and renewal, and can Iexplain this by sharing another,
(21:57):
initially sad story with asmile.
Speaker 2 (22:00):
Of course, please, please share.
Speaker 1 (22:03):
Okay.
So after losing my mother, Iwas diagnosed with microadenoma
in the head.
So before surgery, I took mydaughter on a trip with family
and friends and I wanted tocreate memories for her, like
little icky guys that she couldcarry in her heart forever.
(22:24):
And we were returning by ferryfrom a beautiful, beautiful
Greek island yes, one of thosewith a blue Aegean Sea, with the
white houses, if you have apicture in your mind and it was
a very hot summer night and theboat could stop at all small
(22:45):
islands throughout the journeyto our house.
And I was asleep and one of myprecious friends woke me up and
said come and see the view onthe deck.
To be honest, I didn't want tomove, I was so tired, but he
insisted and I'm so gratefulthat he did.
(23:07):
I stepped onto the deck andthere it was, a little harbor,
glowing in the golden hourlights, you know, and the sun
was setting from the one sideand the full moon was rising
from the other, and the waterwas so cold, so cold, it
mirrored everything like glass.
(23:29):
And there, nicholas, I sawmyself and for the first time I
could see a future.
And I sat there, took my momentand I promised to this port.
(23:49):
I'm coming back, and thatfuture image of me returning to
that little port in the AegeanSea became my ikigai for the
next months, a picture thatcarried me through procedures,
through surgery and then throughrecovery, and it was my
mentally resting and motivatingport.
(24:10):
At the same time, it gavemeaning to my mornings, so it
brought calm and chaos and ithelped me smile throughout the
procedure.
And, yes, so ikigai is indeed afeeling, as you described so
beautifully, nicholas.
And, of course, when I'minvited to talk about ikigai, I
(24:34):
don't only speak about mypersonal understanding or
feeling of Ikigai.
I don't only speak about mypersonal understanding or
feeling of Ikigai.
I also speak about what Ikigaimeans to the Japanese people, as
described in your work and inthe writings of Professors Mogi,
professor Hasegawa, Kamiya, andI'm eager to learn more.
Speaker 2 (24:58):
Wow, what a beautiful image, what a beautiful story,
and it shows you how thesesimple things we see can give us
this deep emotion, this feelingof connection and, I guess,
hope and something to live forfor the future.
So thank you for sharing thatbeautiful story.
Speaker 1 (25:21):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (25:22):
You're sharing a lot of yourself on this podcast, so
I really appreciate that.
Speaker 1 (25:28):
You're the reason why .
Speaker 2 (25:32):
Well, I'm glad we're friends and that we can share
with each other.
So you're this amazing friendnow to me.
But I think you're also anamazing coach and you have
helped, I'm sure, many people inyour life and interestingly I
guess sort of amazingly you havehelped Olympic athletes who are
(25:53):
struggling and I know you'vehelped I, I think one athlete in
particular achieve gold, whichis fascinating, and you were
sort of telling me on the emailyou know I don't really want to
talk about it too much like whatare you talking about?
This is like an amazing story.
Would you like to share howyour coaching helped this
(26:15):
athlete and other athletes withtheir success?
Speaker 1 (26:19):
okay, it was an athlete that.
Okay, more athletes and coachesand the diamond league move to
a1 league or make it to theplayoffs or finals at the
olympic games.
Yes, uh, many of the athletes Icoach, even at Olympic level,
(26:42):
they struggle with stress andthey basically come for stress
management and they stay forperformance elevation.
But basically they come forstress management and I work
with them one-on-one or ingroups.
I coach teams, I coach coaches.
(27:04):
I've mentally coached sportscoaches as well.
They feel stress as well andI've been utilizing tools rooted
in Japanese traditions, such asmindfulness, kaizen, creating
more mass space, explaining mudamanagement and explaining
(27:26):
ikigai, Nice, and we work a lotwith finding their personal
optimal way of entering flowstatus and we work with
visualization as well.
Well, executives face similarchallenges and my seminars and
workshops are designed withJapanese concepts to unlock
(27:48):
focus, clarity and always withina coaching framework, meaning I
do not give solutions, I askquestions coaching framework,
meaning I do not give solutions,I ask questions.
Speaker 2 (28:03):
It's fascinating how much Japanese culture offers
with concepts obviouslymindfulness and kaizen, which
are quite common.
But then there is this idea ofma, which maybe our audience
might not know about.
But this idea of space or gapor room, and I know in Japanese
culture it's kind of ineverything.
(28:23):
It's in architecture, it's inthe way a tea room is designed
at Chashitsu or it's in NorthTheatre, and Japanese are very
comfortable with silence, sothat's very powerful to use in
coaching.
But I've never heard of mudamanagement, so would you like to
(28:45):
touch on muda management?
Speaker 1 (28:47):
Yes, of course, Muda management is about controlling
the muda.
Muda is in Japanese.
It means whatever is not needed, not necessary, so it has to do
with basically putting asideeverything that is not required
towards our goal.
If that makes sense, it doesmake sense.
(29:11):
Yeah, sometimes it's more aboutleaving things behind than
getting things.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
Yeah, yeah, it seems maybe related to you like having
enough and not needing more,and often, I guess, getting
clarity is about what can Iremove, what don't I need.
We do live in a capitalisticsociety.
We're materialistic, we alwaysthink more means more, but it
(29:43):
often is the opposite Havingless, I guess, gives you quality
of focus time and less stress.
So let's move on to anotherword we both love and we
mentioned before, that you useas a guiding principle in your
coaching kokorozashi.
I love the sound of this word.
(30:05):
How do you define kokorozashi?
Speaker 1 (30:09):
Kokorozashi, the letter behind you is translated
as the fighting spirit of thewarrior, isn't it?
There is a spirit also there,when not at war, not fighting, A
(30:29):
spirit that serves one's values, a spirit that brings clarity
to the heart, to the mind, aspirit that reflects will,
ambition and mission, and aspirit that aligns the intention
with the direction.
Speaker 2 (30:51):
It actually sounds perfect for athletes.
It involves your mind, yourheart, your spirit, where you're
headed, your mission, yourambition, direction, perfect
word.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
Yes, absolutely, direction, perfect word.
Speaker 2 (31:05):
yes, absolutely how do your clients respond to some
of these words?
So you're introducing maybethis idea of ma or muda,
management or kokorozashi ormaybe ikigai.
How do they respond to thesewords and these concepts?
Speaker 1 (31:27):
Nick, they love it, they love it, and it's so a way
different from the Greekmentality and I think that makes
it even more attractive.
Yeah, we're quite the opposite.
You know Greeks and Japanese.
Speaker 2 (31:45):
Actually I do have some Greek friends in Melbourne.
Oh yes, and we go out.
You know we'll go out, for weeat a lot of pizza actually
together.
One of my Australian friends,he organizes these boys' nights
out and there's about three orfour Greek guys and they're
always sort of talking over eachother and joking and sort of
(32:10):
almost trying to outdo eachother.
And I remember one night sortof sitting and watching all this
sort of it almost looked likeconflict and I think, oh, I need
some ma.
Speaker 1 (32:24):
Dialogue.
That's the essence of dialogue,nick.
That's the essence of democracy.
Well, both cultures, yes, bothcultures.
They communicate with heart,but the expression is different.
Speaker 2 (32:42):
So you bring them together and bring balance.
Speaker 1 (32:47):
I hope so.
Speaker 2 (32:51):
As you know, there are a lot of Greeks in Australia
, so I grew up with Greeks.
I had some really good friendswho are Greek.
In primary school it was reallystrange, like in primary school
it didn't matter who you wereor where you were from, you
could be friends with anyone.
And then once we got into highschool it sort of became tribal
(33:13):
and you had the Greeks, you hadthe Aussies, you had the Asians
and we were all kind ofseparated, which is really sad.
But now I have Australia as amulticultural, so I have a lot
of friends from differentcultures and that's the beauty
we get to learn, try differentfoods, understand different
(33:36):
cultures, maybe go to differentcountries absolutely yeah and my
son's obviously half Japanese.
Speaker 1 (33:45):
Japanese, yes, and my son's obviously half Japanese
and half Australian, yes,Actually, I might touch on Japan
.
Speaker 2 (33:53):
When was the last time you were there?
Speaker 1 (33:57):
2019.
It's been a while actually.
I've missed it so much and I'mplanning to come soon.
Speaker 2 (34:07):
We'll have to meet there, but I'd love to go to
Greece.
From what you told me, weshould do a workshop or
something together.
It would be lovely.
Let's organize that, let's makeit happen.
You're right.
Speaker 1 (34:28):
That's a good idea.
Let's make it a goal.
Goal, a little kokorozashi anda nice higai.
Yes, yes, I, I.
I almost have the picture infront of me already.
You know me and you, oh, lovelyfantastic, oh, thank you.
Speaker 2 (34:40):
So let's move on a little bit more about something
you wrote and I think you'veshared with me.
You state that you are inspiredwhen your clients discover
their true selves by rekindlingtheir childlike inspiration,
creativity and curiosity forlife, activating their inner
(35:02):
voice and personal truth.
That's a beautiful way todescribe it, and I'm a big fan
of this idea of childlike stateand, of course, it reminded me
of Ken Moggy.
He's a big believer ofreconnecting to this inner child
spirit.
So why is that important?
Speaker 1 (35:30):
Well, yes, I'm a big fan of Professor Moggi as well.
And when we reconnect thatinner child of ours, we return
to our authentic selves.
Authentic selves and that'swhere real clarity lives.
And when we approach thingswith Shoshin beginner's mind and
(35:56):
with Kokishin curiosity, wecreate room for openness, for
deep observation andreconnection.
And through this reconnectionwith the true self and with our
inner child, people can makemore conscious and more
(36:18):
confident choices towards a moremeaningful growth in the areas
of life and what really reallymatters.
Speaker 2 (36:25):
I love it.
It's something I've thoughtabout and I was thinking we have
our authenticity when we goback to this almost free, this
free, childlike state whereanything's possible.
But I love how you alsomentioned that's where clarity
lives.
(36:45):
We get clarity.
I guess we forget about thestress and the things that don't
matter and we get thisbeautiful focus on what matters
and we have hope, we have beliefand when we were children, like
anything was possible with ourimagination and our sense of
(37:05):
freedom, our creativity, ourplayfulness.
And then, as we get older, wefind out all these problems of
the world and relationships andsociety conditions us and you
have to go to school and learnthis way and you have to decide
your career and choose subjectsto study and this kind of
(37:29):
incredible, this incrediblepressure that most people
struggle with to some degree.
And then, of course, we finishschool, maybe university, get a
job, maybe fall in love, getmarried.
But along the way I think welose intention, clarity, freedom
(37:52):
, creativity and the inner childis kind of neglected.
I think your coaching, if itbrings out this inner child,
inspiration for your clients andfor these athletes, it must be
very transformative.
Speaker 1 (38:07):
I hope so.
Speaker 2 (38:08):
I'm sure it is.
Tell us a little bit more aboutany plans you have or your
coaching, any goals you'd liketo share.
Speaker 1 (38:22):
Well, my goal until the end of the year is to visit
Japan, meet with you somewherein Japan or Greece, I don't know
work on Ikigai a little bitmore and provide more for my
people.
Speaker 2 (38:44):
This is really interesting because, in a way,
this has been a one kind of likea one-person business for me.
Like, I do a lot of study, Ispend a lot of time in this room
, I do my podcasts, I meet allthese amazing people.
Some people do my certificationand I'm connecting, but I'm not
(39:05):
really connecting that much inperson, and I like to meet
people in person and connectwith people in person, and so
that's what I'm hoping to domore.
So I would love to meet youmaybe work with you.
Speaker 1 (39:23):
Oh, yes, thank you.
Speaker 2 (39:26):
This work has become a great source of Ikigai.
It's connected me to amazingpeople, and here I am.
I just feel so grateful andlucky I can have this
conversation with you, so I'mreally it's kind of strange like
we're so lucky to be living inthis time of technology and we
can have this call, basicallyfor free.
(39:48):
We can share it with the world.
I'm sure a lot of people willbenefit from our conversation.
I'd definitely like to workwith you, do something with you,
so maybe we can work somethingout.
But I'm sure there'd be manypeople who would like to work
with you, so how can theycontact you?
Speaker 1 (40:09):
Thank you, Nick.
I would love to you know, towork with you in the future.
You know that, and even thispodcast was a dream of mine.
It has been for the last yearsand here we are today.
Thank you so much for thisopportunity.
(40:29):
So my website, you can find meat andreanacalfagr.
This is my website's address orLinkedIn profile Andreana Calfa
.
Yes, maybe, I'm not sure.
Do I have a Ubonuki?
My last, I think?
Andriana Ubonuki Kalfa.
(40:50):
I have both on my LinkedInprofile.
Ubonuki is my Japanese name.
Yes, and I is my first name inJapanese.
Speaker 2 (41:01):
Ubonuki is quite rare .
I think Ubunuki is quite rare.
Speaker 1 (41:04):
I think Both of my grandparents' surnames are rare,
Like.
My grandfather's surname isUbunuki and my grandmother's
surname is Shimazu Shimazu.
Speaker 2 (41:16):
Okay, yeah, kind of rare, and do you like to be
called Ai?
Speaker 1 (41:22):
Yes, I love it.
I love it.
The Japanese community inAthens.
They all call me Ai, Really.
Speaker 2 (41:31):
I can call you both, but I might call you Ai now.
And what's the kanji of yourname?
Speaker 1 (41:38):
Ai.
Ai is for love.
Speaker 2 (41:41):
Love, there you go.
You're full of love, so that'sa perfect name.
Love, there you go.
You're full of love, so that'sa perfect name.
So we will put your websitesand your LinkedIn profile in the
show notes so if people want tocontact you.
But it's been very special toget to know you and thank you
(42:09):
for your support.
I know you even shared with mea little video of you doing a
presentation and you were verygenerous and kind to mention me
in your presentation in GreekAlways always.
Speaker 1 (42:18):
A lot of my people knew you already.
They didn't wait for me to tellthem they knew you.
Speaker 2 (42:25):
Oh, that's good to know.
I guess the podcast is helping.
I really appreciate yourvulnerability and sharing your
stories about yourself and yourfamily and how you turn loss
into realizing what you love andwhat matters to you and sharing
that, so that's very specialand you got me a little bit
(42:46):
emotional, so that's a goodthing too, Thank you.
Thank you so much Ai.
Speaker 1 (42:54):
Thank you for creating the room, nicholas.
It was the first time me sayingthose things in public, and
there was a reason for that.
Speaker 2 (43:05):
Well, thank you, We've got to do something
together soon in person, aworkshop.
So let's have a chat about thatnow.
So we'll end the podcast.
So thank you again for being awonderful guest, a very
thoughtful guest, and I reallyenjoyed our conversation.
Speaker 1 (43:24):
Thank you so much, thank you.
To me, Ikigai can be almost anything like little or
big, Something that gives valueto our living, that fuels us to
keep going with kokorozasi, withthe heart of warrior,
especially when life isn't easy.
Speaker 2 (00:32):
My guest today on the Ikigai podcast is Andriana
Ubuduki-Kalfa, an Ikigai coachspecializing in performance,
executive and personalexcellence coaching.
As a Japanese-Greek performancecoach with over 30 years of
experience bridging culturaldifferences between Greece and
Japan in business environments,andriana has developed an
approach that blends traditionalJapanese wisdom with modern
(00:53):
coaching methodologies tominimize stress, enhance
performance and support personaldevelopment.
She has helped Olympic athletesachieve goals and works with
heart to support people live ahappy, balanced and meaningful
life.
It's wonderful to see you today.
Thank you for joining me.
Speaker 1 (01:14):
Thank you so much.
Thank you so much, nicholas.
It's lovely to be here with you.
I feel truly honored for havingthis opportunity to discuss
with you over topics that are soclose to both of our hearts.
And can I be bold enough tostart with a little correction,
of course?
Well, it's not to you.
(01:37):
It's not to you, it's to myself.
You introduced me as an Ikigaicoach and thank you very much
for that.
It's a title I gave myself manyyears ago, because living with
my little Ikigai felt someaningful and I wanted to share
that with my people.
But now that I have encounteredyou, nicolas, and your
(02:01):
beautiful Ikigai coachingprogram, I decided to set my
self-appointed title aside inorder to properly claim it after
completing your course.
No, I saw you, you're laughing.
But you've brought together allthese authors, all these
researchers Okay, some of them Ihad been reading as well and
(02:25):
you have created suchcoach-friendly tools.
I feel like I finally have anally in this space.
You know and I felt that evenbefore knowing you personally,
and I'm ready to jump in.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
Thank you.
Now we've had a few callstogether and you were also on
one of my webinars.
As I said or wrote to you, Ithink you have this beautiful
wisdom and knowledge in you.
You love both of your cultures.
So certainly by experience lifeexperience I think you're an
(03:00):
Ikigai coach.
I think you give Ikigai a lotof depth, wisdom, beauty, all
these things.
So you don't need anycertification or any
qualification at all, especiallyfrom me.
We're allies, I agree, so frameit like that.
So let's move on.
(03:23):
Would you like to talk aboutyour japanese and greek heritage
?
Speaker 1 (03:29):
yes, of course I'd love to and you.
You use this in your coaching,so let's start there, okay well,
thanks to my greek heritage, Ibring the love of dialogue.
You know it's a Greek word,dialogos dialogue and I'm
excited by the fact thatcoaching essentially has deep
(03:52):
roots in the ancient GreekMeptic method of Socrates, also
known as the Socratic method orSocratic method of meftics comes
from the Greek word meftikos,which means midwifery.
Socrates likened his method ofasking questions to the word of
(04:13):
a midwife not giving birthhimself, of course, but helping
others to give birth to theirown insights, to their own ideas
, to their own wisdom.
And that's what coaching is allabout, isn't it, Nick?
We are trained to mainly askthe right questions in order for
(04:35):
our people to really discoverthemselves, their true selves,
their values, their way togrowth.
It's one of them, in their ownunique way.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
It's kind of perfect, isn't it, to have this Greek
heritage.
And, as you mentioned, coachingis almost easy.
You just have to ask questionsand create space.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
It's a privilege.
Speaker 2 (05:03):
So let's move on to your Japanese heritage and how
that helps you with coaching.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
On my Japanese side, I've always been drawn to
methodologies influenced by theJapanese culture, such as
practicing like yourself, suchas practicing mindfulness, flow,
kaizen and, of course, theauthentic principles of Ikigai,
and these values shape how Idesign my coaching services and
(05:32):
how I help people find clarityin their either personal or
professional lives.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Nice, and I know you've studied in Japan, so you
studied at Sophia University inJapan.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
Yes, I had the privilege of studying there as a
European Union Scholar in Japanfor executives back in the
2000s.
During that period of time Iwas already working for a
special program of the GreekMinistry of National Economy to
promote Hellenic-Japanesebusiness collaboration.
Speaker 2 (06:09):
All right, and what did you study at Sofia
University?
Speaker 1 (06:14):
During those studies in Tokyo, we were 37
professionals from all overEurope studying the differences
between European and Japanesebusiness culture, a program
created by Sofia University forthe European Union.
Speaker 2 (06:35):
And how was that for you to go and study in Japan?
It must have been wonderful.
Speaker 1 (06:41):
It was wonderful because it was a combination of
37 people from all over Europestudying the same subject and
the differences, and also I hadthe chance to study about the
Greek business culture when Iwas in Japan, so that was
interesting as well.
Speaker 2 (07:00):
And so that is Hellenic, is that right?
Speaker 1 (07:03):
Hellenic, it means Greek.
Yes, it's another word.
It's more official, theHellenic.
Is that right?
Hellenic, it means Greek.
Yes, it's another word.
It's more official, theHellenic yes.
Speaker 2 (07:10):
Okay, exciting, and so I'll ask you a question, only
because I think you know why.
But did you ever take classesor meet Professor Haruhiko
Tanaka?
He was a guest on my podcast,episode 62.
Speaker 1 (07:29):
Oh well, I don't believe I had the pleasure and
forgive me if I'm wrong,professor, but I'm aware of his
research on Ibasho, a term I usein my daily Japanese, and I'm
looking forward to studying moreabout it.
And you know, I will take thisopportunity, nicole, and say
(07:52):
that I'm always at my e-bashowwhen I'm communicating with you.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
Well, thank you.
Yeah, you sent that in an emailand you've said that now and I
feel the same, so it's a realjoy.
I feel safe, comfortable, thecommunication is easy and I
always look forward to talkingto you, so it gives me something
to look forward to.
Speaker 1 (08:16):
Yes, and you understand my Greek-Japanese
pronunciation.
It's amazing, that's lovely.
Speaker 2 (08:24):
Your pronunciation is lovely.
You've got this heritage.
You're leveraging both yourgreek heritage and your japanese
heritage, both, I think, in theway you live your life, but
also in coaching.
So in business, I think it'sopened up a lot of opportunity
for you.
So today you also offerconsulting to individuals and
(08:48):
businesses involved in tourism,exports, trade and investment
related to Japan.
So what kind of advice do youprovide?
Speaker 1 (09:29):
Well, this is something I've been practicing
since the early 90s Now you knowmy age through various roles.
Back then I worked on a specialprogram initiated by the Greek
Ministry of National Economy topromote the collaboration across
sectors, from economicdevelopment to cultural exchange
(09:52):
, across sectors, from economicdevelopment to cultural exchange
, and since then I'vecontributed to several
organizations in fields such astourism, media, exports.
For example, I worked as aresearcher for Yomiuri Shimbun I
think you know the Japanesenewspaper that the paper sold
over 10 million copies per dayat that time and I was working
(10:15):
for them during the OlympicGames in Athens, before and
after, and I had the role oftheir researcher here in Athens
for more than two years.
But these days I still offer mycounseling services, but
primarily on an educationallevel.
So I'm supporting executives,I'm supporting organisations,
(10:38):
companies, in understanding thecultural differences between
Greece and Japan beforetravelling to Japan or
collaborating with our Japanesecounterparts.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
All right, so you've had a history of consulting.
How long have you been coaching?
Speaker 1 (10:56):
Since 2017.
Speaker 2 (11:00):
Okay, nice, and you sound like you've been getting
really good results, so we'lltalk about that a little bit
later.
But you are here on thispodcast for a number of reasons,
but one is obviously related toIkigai.
So would you mind sharing thetouching story of what a friend
(11:21):
of your mother's told you atyour mother's funeral?
Speaker 1 (11:27):
Okay, yes, nicholas, of course, if it's not too heavy
for the podcast, it'll be fine.
Speaker 2 (11:31):
Okay, it's also a story of course, if it's not too
heavy for the podcast, it'll befine.
Speaker 1 (11:33):
Okay, it's also a story of meaning, and it's the
answer to why I reached for you,isn't it?
Speaker 2 (11:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
Five years ago, we lost our mother to a sudden
stroke At 74, she was so healthythat when she was declared
brain dead, like within hours,they asked if she could be an
organ donor.
And that was not a difficultdecision for the family to make,
(12:03):
as her ikigais were alwaysrelated to serving people,
providing connecting Greece withJapan.
One example is that she lovedteaching Greeks the Japanese
language and especially theJapanese culture, like the tea
ceremony.
She was a master of teaceremony and it was through her
(12:27):
Ikigai that we knew her valuesand she saved more than 10
people with this donation.
Speaker 2 (12:36):
Wow, 10 people.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
Yes, and please note that this is the first time ever
that I'm talking about thispublicly.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
All right, well, thank you for sharing that on my
podcast.
I really appreciate it.
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (12:52):
Thank you for making room.
Her funeral took place on awarm December day in Athens.
We were surrounded by friends.
We were surrounded by herstudents, family, and a Japanese
friend of hers approached meand said Hi son, can I meet your
daughter?
Actually, in Japanese, shementioned her name and she went
(13:17):
like so I looked around to findmy daughter and she added
suddenly, I want to meet herebecause she was your mother's
ikigai, nick.
That sentence changed somethingin me Because up to that moment
(13:41):
, I had not accepted but I wasokay with the Western
interpretation of Ikigai, youknow the one frame with the
context of work, productivityand the four colorful, beautiful
circles.
But this was different.
It has changed something.
And my daughter wasn'tsomething that the world needed,
(14:03):
she was not something that mymother could be paid for, and
yet a woman was there describingmy daughter as someone's ikigai
.
It was then that I decided toresearch the term more,
describing my daughter assomeone's ikigai.
It was then that I decided toresearch the term more and that
(14:25):
research became my personalikigai.
And at the same time, this newikigai of mine served me in
healing from my loss I'm sorryif I'm getting a little bit
emotional, you understand.
And during that journey, amongthe works of Professors Camilla,
professor Mogi, professorHasegawa, I discovered you,
(14:46):
nicholas.
Speaker 2 (14:48):
I'm very happy you did and I'm about to tear up I'm
so lucky to have you here andhave this conversation.
So, thank you, Please thankyour mother's friend for asking
you that question.
I will.
It brought us together, yeah,so it is an amazing word and it
(15:11):
has this special meaning and itcan be quite emotional.
Speaker 1 (15:15):
Thank you, Wiping away tears here meaning, and it
can be quite anything likelittle or big, something that
(15:41):
gives value to our living, thatfuels us to keep going with
kokorozasi, with the heart ofwarrior, especially when life
isn't easy.
And even this podcast became alittle eggy cry for me when you
initially proposed it, nicholas,as something meaningful in the
(16:03):
future I looked forward to.
It gave me energy through avery demanding period without
burnout, and it became a restingport in my mind.
And thank you for waiting forme.
Thank you so much.
Speaker 2 (16:19):
Not at all.
I mean, I was looking forwardto it too, and I knew you'd been
going through a few things.
And yeah, you mentioned theword kokorozashi, so that's
right here.
So that's one of my favoritewords too.
So we seem to love the samewords.
Yeah, the same Japanese words.
Speaker 1 (16:37):
It's amazing, amazing .
Speaker 2 (16:40):
We have some connection, maybe from the past
or something In the same way.
So how does Ikigai help you inyour daily life?
When you're busy, you have allthese challenges.
You're quite ambitious and youknow you have a family, all
these things.
So how does it help you in yourdaily life?
Speaker 1 (17:03):
okay, is it okay to explain with another example?
absolutely so the last months,as you know, we're very full
thank Lots of coaching, lots oftraveling, traveling with my
daughter as well, for karatecompetitions for her.
And in the middle of it, Ireceived your Ikigai course, and
(17:27):
you might have wondered why Ididn't dive in immediately.
Because I was so eager.
Because I was so eager, butfrom the moment I received it,
the course itself became myprecious ikigai and I decided to
(17:48):
give it space.
You know, I didn't want to rushthrough it.
I wanted to enter what I callmy serious study mode, with
intention, calm, respect, andyou you Nicholas understood
exactly what I meant when Iexplained this and that made me
(18:09):
feel so safe and so seen andthat future me picture studying,
being calm, relaxed andenjoying your program has become
one of my ikigais at thismoment.
Speaker 2 (18:28):
Well, thank you, and it was a gift I wanted you to
have and, of course, you can useit whenever you want and I
appreciate that you didn't wantto rush through it or just do it
because I'm worried about whatNick might think that yeah you,
obviously you care aboutlearning and creating space and
(18:50):
time.
So that actually reminds me ofthis idea of utori having space
and room.
Speaker 1 (18:59):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (19:00):
Even when we want to do something, sometimes we need
to stop and just do nothingbecause we have so much going on
, so much stimuli, so muchpressure, so many connections
now.
So, yeah, to have something tolook forward to can be very
helpful.
So that's definitely one way tothink about it.
(19:21):
What's something you're lookingforward to doing?
So I appreciate that that'svery, very special.
Something I'm looking forwardto is one day getting to Greece
or maybe to Japan and meetingyou.
Speaker 1 (19:36):
I think that might be happening soon.
Speaker 2 (19:40):
I hope so.
Yeah, all right, let's talkabout your work, and on your
website you have a number ofways to describe Ikigai, so
let's touch on them, because Ithink it would be very helpful
for our listeners to see allthese different perspectives.
Speaker 1 (20:02):
Okay, yes, ikigai can be a lot of things, of course.
You know that.
It can be something that givesmeaning to our mornings, a
simple thing as a Freddocappuccino.
I'm Greek, you knowMediterranean, we have Fredo
cappuccino.
I'm Greek, you knowMediterranean, we have Fredo
cappuccinos.
And one day we will enjoy onetogether here in Greece.
Speaker 2 (20:25):
Looking forward to it .
Speaker 1 (20:27):
Ikigai can be our family members, a person as we
described before, like mydaughter, my son, my mother, my
cousin.
It can be a loved one, myspouse, my lover.
It can be something that simplybrings a smile to our face,
like someone told me my dog'sgreeting when I come home.
(20:51):
A personal passion we'd pursue,even if no one asked us to
Piano, swimming, writing,dancing, you know, as a path to
flow.
It can be a source of purpose,a role we have in a community
(21:12):
volunteering at the local animalshelter, offering mentoring to
young people, something thatcontributes to our sense of
fulfillment.
Training for a race, not to win,necessarily, but to challenge
myself and see what I'm capableof, seeing the impact of my work
(21:32):
and knowing it helps someone,even in a small way.
By the way, nicholas, I'mwaiting.
I have ordered your book andsmall way.
By the way, nicholas, I'mwaiting.
I have ordered your book andit's on the way.
Thank you and uh.
For me personally, ikigai'sharbor is a place of emotional
rest and renewal, and can Iexplain this by sharing another,
(21:57):
initially sad story with asmile.
Speaker 2 (22:00):
Of course, please, please share.
Speaker 1 (22:03):
Okay.
So after losing my mother, Iwas diagnosed with microadenoma
in the head.
So before surgery, I took mydaughter on a trip with family
and friends and I wanted tocreate memories for her, like
little icky guys that she couldcarry in her heart forever.
(22:24):
And we were returning by ferryfrom a beautiful, beautiful
Greek island yes, one of thosewith a blue Aegean Sea, with the
white houses, if you have apicture in your mind and it was
a very hot summer night and theboat could stop at all small
(22:45):
islands throughout the journeyto our house.
And I was asleep and one of myprecious friends woke me up and
said come and see the view onthe deck.
To be honest, I didn't want tomove, I was so tired, but he
insisted and I'm so gratefulthat he did.
(23:07):
I stepped onto the deck andthere it was, a little harbor,
glowing in the golden hourlights, you know, and the sun
was setting from the one sideand the full moon was rising
from the other, and the waterwas so cold, so cold, it
mirrored everything like glass.
(23:29):
And there, nicholas, I sawmyself and for the first time I
could see a future.
And I sat there, took my momentand I promised to this port.
(23:49):
I'm coming back, and thatfuture image of me returning to
that little port in the AegeanSea became my ikigai for the
next months, a picture thatcarried me through procedures,
through surgery and then throughrecovery, and it was my
mentally resting and motivatingport.
(24:10):
At the same time, it gavemeaning to my mornings, so it
brought calm and chaos and ithelped me smile throughout the
procedure.
And, yes, so ikigai is indeed afeeling, as you described so
beautifully, nicholas.
And, of course, when I'minvited to talk about ikigai, I
(24:34):
don't only speak about mypersonal understanding or
feeling of Ikigai.
I don't only speak about mypersonal understanding or
feeling of Ikigai.
I also speak about what Ikigaimeans to the Japanese people, as
described in your work and inthe writings of Professors Mogi,
professor Hasegawa, Kamiya, andI'm eager to learn more.
Speaker 2 (24:58):
Wow, what a beautiful image, what a beautiful story,
and it shows you how thesesimple things we see can give us
this deep emotion, this feelingof connection and, I guess,
hope and something to live forfor the future.
So thank you for sharing thatbeautiful story.
Speaker 1 (25:21):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (25:22):
You're sharing a lot of yourself on this podcast, so
I really appreciate that.
Speaker 1 (25:28):
You're the reason why .
Speaker 2 (25:32):
Well, I'm glad we're friends and that we can share
with each other.
So you're this amazing friendnow to me.
But I think you're also anamazing coach and you have
helped, I'm sure, many people inyour life and interestingly I
guess sort of amazingly you havehelped Olympic athletes who are
(25:53):
struggling and I know you'vehelped I, I think one athlete in
particular achieve gold, whichis fascinating, and you were
sort of telling me on the emailyou know I don't really want to
talk about it too much like whatare you talking about?
This is like an amazing story.
Would you like to share howyour coaching helped this
(26:15):
athlete and other athletes withtheir success?
Speaker 1 (26:19):
okay, it was an athlete that.
Okay, more athletes and coachesand the diamond league move to
a1 league or make it to theplayoffs or finals at the
olympic games.
Yes, uh, many of the athletes Icoach, even at Olympic level,
(26:42):
they struggle with stress andthey basically come for stress
management and they stay forperformance elevation.
But basically they come forstress management and I work
with them one-on-one or ingroups.
I coach teams, I coach coaches.
(27:04):
I've mentally coached sportscoaches as well.
They feel stress as well andI've been utilizing tools rooted
in Japanese traditions, such asmindfulness, kaizen, creating
more mass space, explaining mudamanagement and explaining
(27:26):
ikigai, Nice, and we work a lotwith finding their personal
optimal way of entering flowstatus and we work with
visualization as well.
Well, executives face similarchallenges and my seminars and
workshops are designed withJapanese concepts to unlock
(27:48):
focus, clarity and always withina coaching framework, meaning I
do not give solutions, I askquestions coaching framework,
meaning I do not give solutions,I ask questions.
Speaker 2 (28:03):
It's fascinating how much Japanese culture offers
with concepts obviouslymindfulness and kaizen, which
are quite common.
But then there is this idea ofma, which maybe our audience
might not know about.
But this idea of space or gapor room, and I know in Japanese
culture it's kind of ineverything.
(28:23):
It's in architecture, it's inthe way a tea room is designed
at Chashitsu or it's in NorthTheatre, and Japanese are very
comfortable with silence, sothat's very powerful to use in
coaching.
But I've never heard of mudamanagement, so would you like to
(28:45):
touch on muda management?
Speaker 1 (28:47):
Yes, of course, Muda management is about controlling
the muda.
Muda is in Japanese.
It means whatever is not needed, not necessary, so it has to do
with basically putting asideeverything that is not required
towards our goal.
If that makes sense, it doesmake sense.
(29:11):
Yeah, sometimes it's more aboutleaving things behind than
getting things.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
Yeah, yeah, it seems maybe related to you like having
enough and not needing more,and often, I guess, getting
clarity is about what can Iremove, what don't I need.
We do live in a capitalisticsociety.
We're materialistic, we alwaysthink more means more, but it
(29:43):
often is the opposite Havingless, I guess, gives you quality
of focus time and less stress.
So let's move on to anotherword we both love and we
mentioned before, that you useas a guiding principle in your
coaching kokorozashi.
I love the sound of this word.
(30:05):
How do you define kokorozashi?
Speaker 1 (30:09):
Kokorozashi, the letter behind you is translated
as the fighting spirit of thewarrior, isn't it?
There is a spirit also there,when not at war, not fighting, A
(30:29):
spirit that serves one's values, a spirit that brings clarity
to the heart, to the mind, aspirit that reflects will,
ambition and mission, and aspirit that aligns the intention
with the direction.
Speaker 2 (30:51):
It actually sounds perfect for athletes.
It involves your mind, yourheart, your spirit, where you're
headed, your mission, yourambition, direction, perfect
word.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
Yes, absolutely, direction, perfect word.
Speaker 2 (31:05):
yes, absolutely how do your clients respond to some
of these words?
So you're introducing maybethis idea of ma or muda,
management or kokorozashi ormaybe ikigai.
How do they respond to thesewords and these concepts?
Speaker 1 (31:27):
Nick, they love it, they love it, and it's so a way
different from the Greekmentality and I think that makes
it even more attractive.
Yeah, we're quite the opposite.
You know Greeks and Japanese.
Speaker 2 (31:45):
Actually I do have some Greek friends in Melbourne.
Oh yes, and we go out.
You know we'll go out, for weeat a lot of pizza actually
together.
One of my Australian friends,he organizes these boys' nights
out and there's about three orfour Greek guys and they're
always sort of talking over eachother and joking and sort of
(32:10):
almost trying to outdo eachother.
And I remember one night sortof sitting and watching all this
sort of it almost looked likeconflict and I think, oh, I need
some ma.
Speaker 1 (32:24):
Dialogue.
That's the essence of dialogue,nick.
That's the essence of democracy.
Well, both cultures, yes, bothcultures.
They communicate with heart,but the expression is different.
Speaker 2 (32:42):
So you bring them together and bring balance.
Speaker 1 (32:47):
I hope so.
Speaker 2 (32:51):
As you know, there are a lot of Greeks in Australia
, so I grew up with Greeks.
I had some really good friendswho are Greek.
In primary school it was reallystrange, like in primary school
it didn't matter who you wereor where you were from, you
could be friends with anyone.
And then once we got into highschool it sort of became tribal
(33:13):
and you had the Greeks, you hadthe Aussies, you had the Asians
and we were all kind ofseparated, which is really sad.
But now I have Australia as amulticultural, so I have a lot
of friends from differentcultures and that's the beauty
we get to learn, try differentfoods, understand different
(33:36):
cultures, maybe go to differentcountries absolutely yeah and my
son's obviously half Japanese.
Speaker 1 (33:45):
Japanese, yes, and my son's obviously half Japanese
and half Australian, yes,Actually, I might touch on Japan
.
Speaker 2 (33:53):
When was the last time you were there?
Speaker 1 (33:57):
2019.
It's been a while actually.
I've missed it so much and I'mplanning to come soon.
Speaker 2 (34:07):
We'll have to meet there, but I'd love to go to
Greece.
From what you told me, weshould do a workshop or
something together.
It would be lovely.
Let's organize that, let's makeit happen.
You're right.
Speaker 1 (34:28):
That's a good idea.
Let's make it a goal.
Goal, a little kokorozashi anda nice higai.
Yes, yes, I, I.
I almost have the picture infront of me already.
You know me and you, oh, lovelyfantastic, oh, thank you.
Speaker 2 (34:40):
So let's move on a little bit more about something
you wrote and I think you'veshared with me.
You state that you are inspiredwhen your clients discover
their true selves by rekindlingtheir childlike inspiration,
creativity and curiosity forlife, activating their inner
(35:02):
voice and personal truth.
That's a beautiful way todescribe it, and I'm a big fan
of this idea of childlike stateand, of course, it reminded me
of Ken Moggy.
He's a big believer ofreconnecting to this inner child
spirit.
So why is that important?
Speaker 1 (35:30):
Well, yes, I'm a big fan of Professor Moggi as well.
And when we reconnect thatinner child of ours, we return
to our authentic selves.
Authentic selves and that'swhere real clarity lives.
And when we approach thingswith Shoshin beginner's mind and
(35:56):
with Kokishin curiosity, wecreate room for openness, for
deep observation andreconnection.
And through this reconnectionwith the true self and with our
inner child, people can makemore conscious and more
(36:18):
confident choices towards a moremeaningful growth in the areas
of life and what really reallymatters.
Speaker 2 (36:25):
I love it.
It's something I've thoughtabout and I was thinking we have
our authenticity when we goback to this almost free, this
free, childlike state whereanything's possible.
But I love how you alsomentioned that's where clarity
lives.
(36:45):
We get clarity.
I guess we forget about thestress and the things that don't
matter and we get thisbeautiful focus on what matters
and we have hope, we have beliefand when we were children, like
anything was possible with ourimagination and our sense of
(37:05):
freedom, our creativity, ourplayfulness.
And then, as we get older, wefind out all these problems of
the world and relationships andsociety conditions us and you
have to go to school and learnthis way and you have to decide
your career and choose subjectsto study and this kind of
(37:29):
incredible, this incrediblepressure that most people
struggle with to some degree.
And then, of course, we finishschool, maybe university, get a
job, maybe fall in love, getmarried.
But along the way I think welose intention, clarity, freedom
(37:52):
, creativity and the inner childis kind of neglected.
I think your coaching, if itbrings out this inner child,
inspiration for your clients andfor these athletes, it must be
very transformative.
Speaker 1 (38:07):
I hope so.
Speaker 2 (38:08):
I'm sure it is.
Tell us a little bit more aboutany plans you have or your
coaching, any goals you'd liketo share.
Speaker 1 (38:22):
Well, my goal until the end of the year is to visit
Japan, meet with you somewherein Japan or Greece, I don't know
work on Ikigai a little bitmore and provide more for my
people.
Speaker 2 (38:44):
This is really interesting because, in a way,
this has been a one kind of likea one-person business for me.
Like, I do a lot of study, Ispend a lot of time in this room
, I do my podcasts, I meet allthese amazing people.
Some people do my certificationand I'm connecting, but I'm not
(39:05):
really connecting that much inperson, and I like to meet
people in person and connectwith people in person, and so
that's what I'm hoping to domore.
So I would love to meet youmaybe work with you.
Speaker 1 (39:23):
Oh, yes, thank you.
Speaker 2 (39:26):
This work has become a great source of Ikigai.
It's connected me to amazingpeople, and here I am.
I just feel so grateful andlucky I can have this
conversation with you, so I'mreally it's kind of strange like
we're so lucky to be living inthis time of technology and we
can have this call, basicallyfor free.
(39:48):
We can share it with the world.
I'm sure a lot of people willbenefit from our conversation.
I'd definitely like to workwith you, do something with you,
so maybe we can work somethingout.
But I'm sure there'd be manypeople who would like to work
with you, so how can theycontact you?
Speaker 1 (40:09):
Thank you, Nick.
I would love to you know, towork with you in the future.
You know that, and even thispodcast was a dream of mine.
It has been for the last yearsand here we are today.
Thank you so much for thisopportunity.
(40:29):
So my website, you can find meat andreanacalfagr.
This is my website's address orLinkedIn profile Andreana Calfa
.
Yes, maybe, I'm not sure.
Do I have a Ubonuki?
My last, I think?
Andriana Ubonuki Kalfa.
(40:50):
I have both on my LinkedInprofile.
Ubonuki is my Japanese name.
Yes, and I is my first name inJapanese.
Speaker 2 (41:01):
Ubonuki is quite rare .
I think Ubunuki is quite rare.
Speaker 1 (41:04):
I think Both of my grandparents' surnames are rare,
Like.
My grandfather's surname isUbunuki and my grandmother's
surname is Shimazu Shimazu.
Speaker 2 (41:16):
Okay, yeah, kind of rare, and do you like to be
called Ai?
Speaker 1 (41:22):
Yes, I love it.
I love it.
The Japanese community inAthens.
They all call me Ai, Really.
Speaker 2 (41:31):
I can call you both, but I might call you Ai now.
And what's the kanji of yourname?
Speaker 1 (41:38):
Ai.
Ai is for love.
Speaker 2 (41:41):
Love, there you go.
You're full of love, so that'sa perfect name.
Love, there you go.
You're full of love, so that'sa perfect name.
So we will put your websitesand your LinkedIn profile in the
show notes so if people want tocontact you.
But it's been very special toget to know you and thank you
(42:09):
for your support.
I know you even shared with mea little video of you doing a
presentation and you were verygenerous and kind to mention me
in your presentation in GreekAlways always.
Speaker 1 (42:18):
A lot of my people knew you already.
They didn't wait for me to tellthem they knew you.
Speaker 2 (42:25):
Oh, that's good to know.
I guess the podcast is helping.
I really appreciate yourvulnerability and sharing your
stories about yourself and yourfamily and how you turn loss
into realizing what you love andwhat matters to you and sharing
that, so that's very specialand you got me a little bit
(42:46):
emotional, so that's a goodthing too, Thank you.
Thank you so much Ai.
Speaker 1 (42:54):
Thank you for creating the room, nicholas.
It was the first time me sayingthose things in public, and
there was a reason for that.
Speaker 2 (43:05):
Well, thank you, We've got to do something
together soon in person, aworkshop.
So let's have a chat about thatnow.
So we'll end the podcast.
So thank you again for being awonderful guest, a very
thoughtful guest, and I reallyenjoyed our conversation.
Speaker 1 (43:24):
Thank you so much, thank you.
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