Love Is Blind, But Not To Mustaches

Episode Transcript
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SPEAKER_00 (00:03):
The Refreshingly Normal Podcast.

SPEAKER_01 (00:23):
Hello, everybody.
Thank you for tuning in with usat the Refreshingly Normal
Podcasts.
I am Keith Lo.

SPEAKER_03 (00:32):
I am Kree.

SPEAKER_01 (00:34):
And we are so excited to have you back again
with us.
I hope you're enjoyingeverything.
And uh let's just get right intoit.
Today's episode is brought toyou by Life.

SPEAKER_03 (00:48):
I was gonna say nobody.

SPEAKER_01 (00:52):
Because life is amazing.
Life and cough.

SPEAKER_03 (00:57):
I'm sorry.
I still have a wee bit of acough.
Not nearly as bad as um lastweek.

SPEAKER_01 (01:04):
No, I've actually been able to get a little sleep.
Yeah.
A little sleep, just a littlebit.
There's been other factorskeeping me up.

SPEAKER_03 (01:14):
Anywho, I've been sleeping well.

SPEAKER_01 (01:17):
Always you should.
But anyway, let's get right downto it.
Okay, do Kifla, what um have youdone um great this week?
Because if I would say Kree,well, I was waiting for him to
ask me first.

SPEAKER_03 (01:34):
He said he asked me first every time.

SPEAKER_01 (01:38):
So I forgot we was doing a podcast.
Whatever.

SPEAKER_03 (01:42):
Anywho, tell us yours because last time I went
first.

SPEAKER_01 (01:46):
So the last time we filmed, we we uh we recorded was
last Thursday.
Last Wednesday last Wednesday.
Okay, so um nothing really wentdown this uh for us because you
were sick.

SPEAKER_03 (02:03):
Yes.

SPEAKER_01 (02:04):
And um, and I just I I I got my yard together yes uh
this weekend, this past weekend.
Uh I had to trim the hedges andto cut the grass a little low.
Um I need to get me a lawnmower,though.
So if anybody out therelawnmower land, I need me a new
lawnmower.
All right, I was using mybrothers and I need my own

(02:26):
tools, okay?
Um but I got my my yardtogether, you know, I'm big on
that.
So now I still need to do like Iwant to pressure wash the um the
driveway.
I want to pressure wash thedriveway, and then I want to um
get everything together on theback patio for cause it's

(02:47):
getting ready to be, you know,nice little sit on the patio and
listen to the radio kind ofweather.
Cause it won't, you know,mosquitoes are getting ready to
leave because it's gonna becool.
So you gotta worry about thatgnats and all that stuff, you
know.
But I want to have all thattaken care of so that we can
enjoy the beautiful patio thatwe um got uh installed with miss

(03:07):
by Mr.
Caesar.
Um what else?
Uh I had a great uh did I haveIEP?
Yeah, I did an IEP uh Monday.
Um it was virtual, so that wasgood.
It went very well.
I have two next week, I think itis.
Um so I'm in that season, baby.

(03:31):
I'm just boom, boom, boom, boom,typing.
So other than that, uh the gymis coming back.
I'm feeling I I feel the energy.
I wiped myself out today,though.
Ooh.
Yeah, and then I got Nasana forlike 25 minutes.

SPEAKER_03 (03:46):
What's your friend in there?

SPEAKER_01 (03:48):
Yeah, he oh, not the uh the but Wayne came back.

SPEAKER_03 (03:51):
Oh, Wayne, okay.

SPEAKER_01 (03:52):
Yeah, so I was nervous that when, you know, I
was like, dang, I ain't seenWayne.
But maybe, you know, he's comingin early or whatever because he
has, I think he may be on theconferencing schedule.
Oh.
So he could come in early, yeah,and go home.
But um, I saw him today.
I was like, whew, make sure myboy was all right.
Um, but the other guy, no, Ihaven't seen him.
I saw some other dude in theretoday in the sauna talking about

(04:15):
um um fasting.
He asked me, do I fast?
And he said, the body can fast.
He said, I fast for out of aweek, I fast 96 hours in a week.
What?
Something like that.
That's how many hours out of theweek he fasts.
He eats only four times a week.
So when he fasts, and then hebreaks his fast with his meal,

(04:39):
and then he's right into thenext fast.
So it's like one time.
He only eats four times a week.

SPEAKER_03 (04:44):
I think I remember seeing some other guy that did
that.
He did fasting like that.
Yeah.
And then he ate a big bulk of ameal all at one time, but he ate
enough that was supposed tosustain him.

SPEAKER_01 (04:58):
Oh, I mean, he he I mean, he's in great shape now.
Yeah.
This dude is, I mean, nicemuscle bellies.
Yeah.
I mean, he's in amazing shape,but I was like, shoot, fasting
for that long.

SPEAKER_03 (05:09):
But I I I remember seeing a guy like that, I don't
know if it was Instagram orTikTok, but when he did eat, it
wasn't like a small meal.
Yeah.
Like he ate a significant.
Yeah.
Uh-huh.
And and so that sustained him.

SPEAKER_01 (05:23):
That probably wouldn't work for me because I
eat and fall asleep.
Like, you know, I get sleepy.

SPEAKER_03 (05:28):
Well, if you ate it when you did in the evening when
you got home.

SPEAKER_01 (05:31):
But now you don't put that on your stomach.
People that have, like, youknow, my stomach don't do right.
People that stomach don't.

SPEAKER_03 (05:37):
I think anybody's body for something so extreme,
because that means that would beextreme for somebody who eats
three meals a day, that at somepoint your body would.

SPEAKER_01 (05:46):
I mean, I'm sure it would regulate.
It would be like that.

SPEAKER_03 (05:48):
Would regulate and adjust.

SPEAKER_01 (05:50):
I wouldn't know what's going on in here.

SPEAKER_03 (05:53):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (05:53):
Gut-wise, you know.
Yeah.
It's like different.
But I don't want to do that.
I like eating.
That's why we work out so hard.

SPEAKER_03 (06:04):
Well, you do get to eat, but you get to eat that one
time.

SPEAKER_01 (06:06):
I know.
I don't know.
I probably could do that.

SPEAKER_03 (06:10):
I mean, just depends, and I guess, I don't
know.

SPEAKER_01 (06:13):
Yeah.
But he's, I mean, he was lookingnice, though.
He had nice muscle bellies andeverything, but not your boy.
Um, right, not right now, put itlike that.
I probably will go on aspiritual journey where I'm
fasting and um, you know, doingmy meditation even more so in a
deep dive.
But nah, I'm good.

unknown (06:34):
Okay.

SPEAKER_01 (06:34):
So, did was that enough time for you to think
about your week?
I was already prepared to talkabout my week.
That's what they always say.

SPEAKER_03 (06:43):
Anywho.

SPEAKER_01 (06:43):
Okay.
All right.
So, how was your week?
I was sick since we last uhrecorded.

SPEAKER_03 (06:49):
I was sick.
So I um pushed through the weekbecause I had um lots of
trainings, um, presentations todo that I didn't want to cancel
on.
So I tried to like do mymedicine.
Like I never had a fever oranything, I just was sick.

SPEAKER_02 (07:09):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (07:10):
Um, I did take um like a COVID test just to make
sure that I wasn't beingirresponsible in taking, I mean,
COVID germs with me.
Yeah.
So I didn't have a COVID oranything, it was just a cold.
So um, so anywho, I pushedthrough the week to make it
through the week.

(07:31):
And Saturday and Sunday, well,more Saturday.
Um, I just really spent the dayresting on Saturday and just
taking meds back to back.
Bench watched um um is LoveBlind, the new season, season

(07:53):
nine.
So I did that on Saturday.
I think the new, the rest of theepisodes came out yesterday.
So I'll have to watch those tosee what's going on on Love is
Blind.
But I did that.
And then Sunday, I still rested,um, but I still helped with our

(08:15):
um house tasks like uh washingclothes and that sort of thing.
But I did more rest thananything.
Like I washed clothes, but Ispent most of the time on the
sofa relaxing and yeah, you needto get that energy back, man.
Yeah, so I did that, and MondayI felt better.

(08:35):
That cough was um had gone away.
Not a way away, but it was muchbetter.
So, anywho, that's what I did.
And then for work this week, um,I've been super busy with um

(08:56):
presentations.

SPEAKER_01 (08:57):
Good busy though, because you came home with some
good stories.
You got a new favorite school.

SPEAKER_03 (09:01):
You had yeah, I have a new, uh I shouldn't have
favorites, but I do.
So when we do one of ourtrainings with the student high
school, middle school students,I have a new favorite high
school.
Um, the students were justawesome and so insightful and
engaged, huh?
Very engaged, vulnerable, reallyexpressive.

(09:27):
Yeah, they're really expressiveof their thoughts, like they
really, I guess, felt safe inthat space.
And so um, that just made forgood conversation and had a good
time with them.

SPEAKER_01 (09:39):
So question, like when you do that, are they um
because you know you mentionedvulnerability, so that means a
lot of of course a lot of kidsare not vulnerable.
Like I was saying with the whenI had to cover the homeroom,
they didn't want to shareanything.
So d do you notice like you hadwell, okay, was was this
particular class where uh thevulnerability like shackles fell

(10:06):
apart all at once, um, and whereeverybody wanted to share, or it
kind of like a few shared andthen everybody felt got
comfortable and it was like, oh,let me share.
Oh, let me share.
Like that.
Well, um Or was it a just theywere just ready?

SPEAKER_03 (10:21):
I feel like they were kind of just ready.
I I the way that our training isset up, it does over by the end,
majority are that way.

SPEAKER_02 (10:37):
I'm sure.

SPEAKER_03 (10:38):
Um this group just started early on.
That's good.

SPEAKER_01 (10:42):
That's good.

SPEAKER_03 (10:42):
Yeah, they just started early on.
I wonder why.

SPEAKER_01 (10:45):
Like were they prepped in the world.
You know what?

SPEAKER_03 (10:46):
I think it was I think um this was their leader
or their uh person in charge ofthe group, their sponsor, isn't
it was not a school counselor.

SPEAKER_01 (10:59):
It's a regular teacher, but so they interact
probably with more of those kidson a regular well, yeah, and you
and she just I had relationshipswith some of them.

SPEAKER_02 (11:12):
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_03 (11:13):
Yeah, and uh I think it was partly part of that
because of her.

SPEAKER_02 (11:17):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (11:18):
Um, so yeah, I think that that that you could tell
that there was a uh a trueconnection with some of them
with her, and I think that'swhat made it that way.
The kids weren't necessarilydidn't know each other because
they mentioned um that they hadseen each other, like when we do
our wrap-up follow-up, and theymentioned, like, I I've seen

(11:41):
some of y'all, but I've never sothere's like, but today was such
a great time with each other,and so friends.
So yeah, and they have a bigleadership role, so um, in the
work they're getting ready todo.
Um, so that was um really niceto spend the day because we
spent an entire day with them.

(12:01):
Yeah.
Um, and then I got to beinterviewed by some fifth
graders.
They are doing a project wherethey um um these are are these
gifted students, you said yeah.
Okay, they're gifted students,and they have a project of where
they want to create change orhave some sort of impact with

(12:23):
their school community or theircommunity overall.
And they wanted to um figure outwhat were the best strategies or
tools for students with ADHD andanxiety um because they wanted
to be able to provide some extraresources for kids in their

(12:48):
school.
So the kids wanted to provide.
I love it.
Um, so they wanted to ask mequestions like from my
experience, what are good toolsor what do kids tend to like?
What what are some of thestrategies that I've seen work?
They asked me what are somethings that the kids feel like
they need, but it really doesn'twork.

(13:08):
So it's like a need, but theydon't really, it's a want, but
it's not really a need, likeit's not working for them.
And so they talk through, wetalk through, and I answer their
questions, and um, and so theytold me what they were trying to
do, and um, and they werewanting to make fidgets and
things on their own and maybesell them, or but that's a

(13:31):
that's a big task.

SPEAKER_02 (13:33):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (13:33):
Um, and so I told them that I think it'd be great
um that they should write, theyhave to write this into a
proposal, anyways.
And I said, I think we couldlook into possibly finding
someone to sponsor or grant orsomething that somebody would do
after reading your proposal.
And I told them I'd be willingto support them and help them

(13:55):
with that.
And then what they could do ishave a checkout center, create a
checkout center for particularitems that that students could
check out.
And in the meantime, let's thinkabout like creating posters that
they could put around the schoolthat would say top five

(14:15):
strategies to help you focus,top five strategies to help you
when you're anxious, top fivestrategies when you um are very
energetic.
Um, just things that that goalign with certain certain
characteristics of an ADHD oranxious person.
Right.
And they can put posters aroundthe school and areas where kids

(14:37):
would see them.
So they'd be more centeredaround that, around those
specific things that kids couldrelate to and they could help in
that way until we're able topossibly get their um their
checkout center together.
So, anywho, I I had not thoughtabout that and didn't know what

(14:58):
they were trying to do.
Uh-oh, somebody's blowing thenose.
Um, so anywho, um that is uh Igot to talk with them today, but
it was just so cute to see themas fifth graders and and coming
together for um their idea fortheir um project of that will
create change or s or help theiruh school community.

(15:21):
So that was nice to do today tosee little people doing good
work.

SPEAKER_01 (15:26):
Good job, good job, good job in in your um uh okay,
what am I trying to say?
Good job in your beingimpactful, yeah.
To the change agents of today.
Yeah, of tomorrow.
Of tomorrow.

SPEAKER_03 (15:40):
So that was really nice.
I was glad that their teacherthought to ask me, and so I got
to get on a call, a uh virtualcall with them, and um, for them
to interview me.
So that was nice.
Good job, good job, good job.
Anything else?
Um, let's see.
Other than that, no, for thisweek.

SPEAKER_01 (16:01):
Yeah, that's it.

SPEAKER_03 (16:03):
Yeah, I think that's it for me.
That's good enough.
I mean, yeah.
Other than that, it was just umjust busy with other trainings,
but the typical trainings,nothing different.

SPEAKER_01 (16:16):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (16:17):
Those are my two outs.

SPEAKER_01 (16:19):
Well, when you when you um and for the next episode,
you have a little something toshare.

SPEAKER_03 (16:25):
Oh, yeah, because I'm going to the conference.
Yeah.
So I go to the conference onSunday.
Yeah.
So I'm excited about that.
I've already looked through thebrochure of what sessions are
being offered and have writtendown my top two for each time
period.
And um, our friend is back, MissCinnabon.

(16:49):
She don't need nothing until weget on this little thing talking
and not paying her any mind.

SPEAKER_01 (16:53):
The whole time we was doing it.

SPEAKER_03 (16:54):
The whole time.

SPEAKER_01 (16:56):
She was not doing anything.

SPEAKER_03 (16:57):
She was not worried about it.

SPEAKER_01 (16:59):
She got a whole nother human being in the room
like that that she can go andbark at.

SPEAKER_03 (17:02):
No, little girl.

SPEAKER_01 (17:03):
Go get Kahari.
Go, go get Kahari.
Go.

SPEAKER_03 (17:07):
Go go get Kahari.

SPEAKER_01 (17:08):
Go get Kahari.

SPEAKER_03 (17:09):
Kahari.

SPEAKER_01 (17:11):
Go, Cindy.

SPEAKER_03 (17:12):
Go to Kahari's room.

SPEAKER_01 (17:14):
Anyway, guys.

SPEAKER_03 (17:16):
Anywho.

SPEAKER_01 (17:16):
If you are a dog parent, you understand.
Especially a needy dog parent.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (17:22):
So I'm excited about the conference.
I've already kind of decidedwhat sessions I think I want to
go to.

SPEAKER_02 (17:30):
Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_03 (17:30):
So I have those all organized on my app for the
conference.

SPEAKER_00 (17:35):
All right.

SPEAKER_03 (17:36):
So, anywho, I'm excited about that.
And excited for um some timejust to focus on just that.

SPEAKER_01 (17:45):
You know, um, I know it's, you know, we could talk
about it next episode orwhatever, but all this week,
like, I was just really, youknow, because everybody's
talking about Halloween,Halloween, Halloween.
Oh, yeah.
But I'm like, I'm gonna be in aPair Sock Candy this Halloween.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (17:59):
So I'm going to the so go over you.

SPEAKER_03 (18:04):
You, you, you, new Monica.
Yes, we're going to the Monicaand Brandy concert on Halloween.

SPEAKER_01 (18:13):
That's gonna be it's gonna be good.

SPEAKER_03 (18:15):
Uh-huh.
So I'm excited.
I thought that's coming soclose, too.

SPEAKER_01 (18:19):
Yeah, I'm excited about that.
See Brandon sitting up in myroom.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Wait.

SPEAKER_03 (18:26):
Yeah, I'm gonna be.

SPEAKER_01 (18:27):
I remember back in the days when I made a joke to
Kobe Bryant about that.

SPEAKER_03 (18:31):
What did you say?

SPEAKER_01 (18:32):
When we were, we had just got through playing
basketball against him for theoriginal um Real World versus
Road Rules challenge.
And uh we was we was outside uhin the parking lot in his car,
sitting in his car.
Um, and I was like, uh, becauseRonnie was sitting in the car,
and I said, Ronnie, you betterget out of there.
Brandy's gonna get mad at you,girl.

(18:53):
And he looked at me and waslike, bruh, why you say that?
And I was like, Ronnie, get outof there.
And so we was, and then we jokedabout something else about it.

SPEAKER_03 (19:04):
Oh, because he like took her to prompt.
Okay, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (19:07):
Yeah, so that's what, yeah, I was like, I was
like, Ronnie, you better get outof there.
Uh, Brandy's gonna be mad atyou.
And we was all just laughing.
Oh, my ring was in my hand whenI put my lotion on in my pocket.
Yep.
So, and I guess that's it.
You ready?
Hey, I it's some questions.
The the first email had somereal cool questions.

SPEAKER_03 (19:28):
The first email.

SPEAKER_01 (19:30):
The one I just sent.
I sent two.
No, it's no.
That's okay.

SPEAKER_03 (19:35):
Oh, I got that.
I mean, I have it, but I didn'tknow you want to go to questions
first.
I didn't know if you wanted tolook at an article first.
I'm sorry, we normally did thedo the article and then we look
at the questions first.

SPEAKER_01 (19:44):
That's what we normally do.

SPEAKER_03 (19:45):
Yeah, that's what we've been doing the last time.

SPEAKER_01 (19:46):
All the 50 times.

SPEAKER_03 (19:47):
That's the last two times, that's how we've done it.
Uh I'm sorry, I'm prepared forthat.

SPEAKER_01 (19:52):
I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_03 (19:53):
I thought we were doing that, the article.
It's whatever you want to do.

SPEAKER_01 (19:58):
I'll do whatever you want to do.

SPEAKER_03 (19:59):
Well, I'm going to keep with the format um and keep
Mr.
ADHD together.
Yep.
You're so welcome.

SPEAKER_01 (20:06):
Yes, yes, Miss Silent when asked on.

SPEAKER_03 (20:10):
So here we have a situation.
This is something that you sentto me.

SPEAKER_01 (20:16):
Of course.

SPEAKER_03 (20:17):
Um, so this person says, I have an amazing fianc.
First of all, before I evenstart, he says, of course, like
I don't send him stuff.
Keep going.
Come on, don't stay ADHD.
I I just won't, I just won't.

SPEAKER_01 (20:32):
You just got sidetracked.

SPEAKER_03 (20:33):
I just want y'all to know I do send things.
Moving on.
Here it says, I have an amazingfiance who is smart, beautiful,
and honest.
I couldn't ask for more.
We are getting married nextyear, and we're excited about

(20:56):
the future we'll have together.
However, I am struggling withsomething in regard to my
fiancee.
She has noticeable facial hair.

(21:16):
I don't know how to talk to herabout it.
I know saying something wouldhurt her feelings, which is
something I want to avoid.
What's the best way to go aboutsaying something without
sounding like a jerk treadinglightly in Florida?

SPEAKER_01 (21:39):
All right, go ahead.

SPEAKER_03 (21:40):
Okay, so, well, first of all, I'm like, well,
she's your fiance.
So you went all this, I don'tknow how long their um dating or
whatever engagement was.
But my goodness, did she growfacial hair last night?

SPEAKER_01 (21:57):
I was about to say, it depends.
He needs to check the moon.
If it's full moon, then maybeshe just grew some.

SPEAKER_03 (22:04):
Okay, listen.
No.
So that was my first question.
Like, why does now the facialhair bother you?
That's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_01 (22:14):
Based off the moon side.

SPEAKER_03 (22:15):
Oh my gosh.
Is that a real save?
That's your book, exactly.
That little book about vampiresize.

SPEAKER_01 (22:22):
The secret world of Maggie Gray.

SPEAKER_03 (22:24):
Okay.
We're talking about the realworld.
Hey.
Not the um looking at everybodydifferent.
Not fantasy.
So if she has facial hair, Idon't, I don't understand.

SPEAKER_01 (22:42):
He said notice, but now he didn't say, like, you
know, because every, you know,women do have a little bit.
But when you got them ones, likethem old uh women that I knew in
the grow in my neighborhood andthey had them little curls on
the side right there, lookinglike the men off of uh Monopoly.
They got them little curlymustache on the side of their
lip.
And occasional little chesthairs.

SPEAKER_03 (23:03):
The point to me is.

SPEAKER_01 (23:05):
That's too much.

SPEAKER_03 (23:07):
Did she just grow the facial hair or has she
always had the facial hair?

SPEAKER_01 (23:12):
Times are tough, so maybe she can't afford the laser
the laser stuff anymore.

SPEAKER_03 (23:17):
Well, it's not laser.
Because usually when you getlasers, it's gone, gone.
It'll come back.
That's why they keep getting it.
No, usually laser is gone, gone.

SPEAKER_01 (23:26):
Forever.

SPEAKER_03 (23:27):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (23:28):
Okay.

SPEAKER_03 (23:28):
I work with um some of the ladies have had that and
they don't grow hair in certainplaces anymore.

SPEAKER_01 (23:34):
Okay.
Well, maybe she's doing waxing,and then waxing is uh is tight.
Money is tight.

SPEAKER_03 (23:39):
Yeah, waxing, yes, because she may need to get it
waxed again.
But this is what I'm saying.
If we have been dating.

SPEAKER_00 (23:50):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (23:52):
And we didn't got to where you didn't ask to marry
me.
At this point, I think, oh, howamazing that I have found a man
who is okay with my facial hair.

SPEAKER_01 (24:05):
Oh, when we wouldn't even be that far.

SPEAKER_03 (24:07):
Exactly.
That's the problem.
He had gotten that far becauselet me tell you what somebody
did to me.
Now I had it wasn't excessivefacial hair.
But y'all know when we used tolike arch our eyebrows and kind
of thin.
What I do.

(24:28):
So when he and I were dating.

SPEAKER_01 (24:31):
And I think it was quite commendable what I did.

SPEAKER_03 (24:35):
When we were dating, he noticed that, like, without
me having them filled in ordrawn in.
Oh, her eyebrows are quite thinand not much hair.
They were different.
Is there?
They were different.

SPEAKER_01 (24:52):
Because I came to pick you up on time, but you
were still getting ready.

SPEAKER_03 (24:57):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (24:57):
And so when you open the door, it wasn't the same
person opening the door as thesame person that closed the door
last time I saw it.
Oh my gosh.
So that's what it was.
It shot it uh not shocked me,but I ain't even gonna say
caught me by surprise.
It just uh it kind of likeenlightened me that there were
more looks to what I have seenbefore.

SPEAKER_03 (25:20):
So he didn't you didn't say anything then, but
maybe I don't know, a littlewhile in he says Kahari, come
get Cinnabon.
I texted him.
I don't think he wants to bebothered.

SPEAKER_01 (25:36):
Yeah, that ain't no choice.

SPEAKER_03 (25:38):
Well, I'm just telling you.
I texted him.

SPEAKER_01 (25:40):
Who do you know who house he's in?

SPEAKER_03 (25:41):
And he didn't respond to my text message.

SPEAKER_01 (25:44):
Is his girlfriend?
I don't know.
I tell her to come get it.

SPEAKER_03 (25:48):
Yeah, I don't have her number.
Her number, she has a newnumber.
She does.
Okay.
It's not new though.
I mean, it's it's it's it'schanged for a while.
Anyways, um, so he said to me,um, have you ever thought about

(26:09):
growing your eyebrows out?
I said, What's wrong with myeyebrows?
He said, Oh, no, no, no, no, no,nothing, nothing.
I just asked the question.
I mean, nothing at all.
I've just you know, I was justthinking, had you ever thought
of that just to fill them in alittle bit more?

SPEAKER_01 (26:28):
What I was saying was, because she she draws them.
So I've known women to them.

SPEAKER_03 (26:36):
I didn't draw the whole thing.

SPEAKER_01 (26:37):
Yeah, but see, I I've known women to cut them and
then draw them right back wherethey was growing.

SPEAKER_03 (26:42):
But mine don't grow like that.

SPEAKER_01 (26:43):
But I didn't know that.
That's why I asked, I was like,have you ever thought to grow
them out?
You know, because she probablywould have been like, Yeah, but
I'm not good at trimming themthe way I want to.
I just cut them and then I candraw better than I can trim.

SPEAKER_03 (26:54):
So my eyebrows grow really like different.
That's all.
So I did, though, let them growout to get them as natural as I
wanted them to be.
But my the end of like myeyebrows grow here, then they
there's a part, and then theygrow like here.
So if you arch them with thehair here, it kind of makes your

(27:15):
eye look like it's going down.
And I wanted to like it's goingup.
So, anyways, at first I was alittle bit offended.

SPEAKER_01 (27:24):
No, sorry, I didn't mean to.

SPEAKER_03 (27:28):
Um, but you know that thing where they say people
had what did they say on TikTokor the things you had eyebrow,
or I can't think of what thephrase that they say, but
somebody should have told me along time ago.
So, anywho, at first I was a bitoffended, but then I was like,

(27:51):
whoa, well, I guess they do lookbetter with me, girl on the
mouth.
And so all of that to say, hedid not tell me that once we
were engaged, it was somethingwe talked about when we were
dating.
When we were dating.
So why in the world you go allthe time and get engaged to this

(28:11):
lady, and now you got a problemwith a facial hair.

SPEAKER_01 (28:14):
But maybe she didn't have the facial hair till they
got engaged.
She probably said, Oh, he got menow.
Oh, so she didn't just letherself go.
Yes.
Love me for me now.
Oh I got him.

SPEAKER_03 (28:25):
Well, you shouldn't do that.
You know how people do thatstuff.
Yeah, they too.

SPEAKER_01 (28:28):
People hide crazy until they get engaged.
They hide their intentions untilthey get engaged, until they get
married.
Oh, I only wanted the money.
I got him now.

SPEAKER_00 (28:37):
Divorce, give me half.

SPEAKER_01 (28:41):
So I'm just saying, who knows?
But hey, like if if you outthere, I I don't mean to offend
you, if you out there with, youknow, uh, you know, getting a
lineup at the barbershop orwhatever.
I understand you probably can'tcontrol that um as a woman.

(29:02):
But um I I just couldn't do it.

SPEAKER_03 (29:06):
Yeah, I just think he should have said so.
He could still say somethingabout it.
Maybe he can even offer to payfor her waxing if if that's what
it's feasible, if it's in theirbudget.

SPEAKER_01 (29:17):
But he could be like, yo, I got you.

SPEAKER_03 (29:19):
She could also say, I'm I'm okay with my facial
hair.

SPEAKER_01 (29:24):
Yeah, leave me alone.

SPEAKER_03 (29:26):
Leave me alone.

SPEAKER_01 (29:26):
Or she could say, Hey, I just want to warn you.
On the full moon, I growwhiskers, I grow, I grow a
mustache like the the the twotwin brothers from the group The
Whispers.
That thick mustache.

SPEAKER_03 (29:42):
And I go to dinner with witches, vampires, and
sirens.

SPEAKER_01 (29:46):
Yeah, I grow a face, a facial bush.

SPEAKER_03 (29:49):
You know, well, and then people and that's also like
men have to know when women getolder, sometimes facial hair
comes and they didn't.
So maybe something happened, andover time it just.
Just started growing.

SPEAKER_01 (30:01):
Yeah, you gotta learn how to treat it.
Take care of it.

SPEAKER_03 (30:04):
Yeah.
So, but he has to say something.
Hopefully, that lady did nothave facial hair way before now,
and he just saying something.

SPEAKER_01 (30:12):
Yeah, thought he could tolerate it, and then it's
like, you know what?
I just need her out.
It's your facial hair.
Mm-mm.

SPEAKER_03 (30:20):
And he said she's beautiful.

unknown (30:23):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (30:24):
Well.

SPEAKER_01 (30:25):
I mean, I've seen some, I've seen some beautiful
women with some facial hair, butthen it immediately makes them
start looking like Lana Richie.
Oh my god.
Oh, she's beautiful.
Then you get up closer and yousee the little cat whiskers, and
you be like, oh.

SPEAKER_03 (30:42):
Well, I mean, he can tell her, but he should have
told her way before engagement.
That's all I'm saying.

SPEAKER_01 (30:52):
Yeah, that's true.

SPEAKER_03 (30:52):
That's not right.

SPEAKER_01 (30:53):
It's not right.
Mm-mm.
But I don't know.
But he probably didn't know ifit was before engagement.
And she just started lettingherself go.
That's not right.
That's not right.
Mm-mm.
Okay.
Anything else you want to read?
You had?

SPEAKER_03 (31:09):
Yes, I do have another.
I'm not going to read this wholething.
I'm going to kind of summarize.

SPEAKER_01 (31:13):
What does it say?
Give me the title.

SPEAKER_03 (31:15):
Man says he's willing to end his marriage
after argument with his wifeabout her plans to uproot the
kids.
Mm.
So a man, I don't know wherethey are.
They didn't say where they are.

SPEAKER_02 (31:31):
Okay.

SPEAKER_03 (31:32):
But this man is on the verge of ending his marriage
to avoid moving his childrenages 11 and 9 to another state.
His wife revealed, he revealedthat his wife wants to move the
family to be close to herteenage children from a previous

(31:52):
relationship.
Okay.
Says we're both committed to thebest interest of our individual
children, and that means doingwhat's right for them, even if
it's not right for us as acouple.
So the kids don't want to move.

SPEAKER_00 (32:10):
Right.

SPEAKER_03 (32:12):
They like their life where they are, but their mom
wants them to be close to thehalf-siblings.

SPEAKER_01 (32:21):
Wonder why she wants that.

SPEAKER_03 (32:22):
And she wants to be closer, I guess, to her own the
other set of children.

SPEAKER_01 (32:28):
Yeah.
Like, because why she don't havecustody of her children?

SPEAKER_03 (32:33):
Yeah.
Why does she not have custody ofthem?
That's a good question.

SPEAKER_01 (32:38):
And um, why is it is it she, you know, do the man,
are they living real good?
And now she like, let's go thereso that my daughter can reap
some of these benefits.
And I can flaunt it in front ofmy ex.
I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 (32:57):
She says, um, he told her he's not doing it, the
move.

SPEAKER_01 (33:03):
Put your foot down, Jack.

SPEAKER_03 (33:05):
Um, he says he feel um he says, my wife doesn't want
to be away from her kids forlong periods of time.
And she has told me she'smoving.
She feels like she needs to benear her kids.
I support this, but I won't movemy kids away from family,
friends, and stability to dothis.
My kids don't want to moveeither.
Then the kids told him theyoverheard their mama talking

(33:30):
about the relocation and thatshe already has made plans to
move.
Even though he said he's not.
He says he thinks she thinkshe's gonna change his mind.

SPEAKER_01 (33:44):
What?

SPEAKER_03 (33:45):
But he says he's not.

SPEAKER_01 (33:47):
So then I wonder, are the kids her kids that she's
living with now or just his?

SPEAKER_03 (33:52):
Mm-mm.
They're hers.
Because she said they want to beclose to their brothers and
sisters.
They're they're siblings.

SPEAKER_01 (33:57):
But so she has kids with him?
But that's what I'm saying.
I wasn't sure.
Like, she didn't really.
I mean, she can say brothers andsisters, you'd be stepbrothers.

SPEAKER_03 (34:06):
Oh no, no, no, no, no.

SPEAKER_01 (34:07):
Those are those are her children too.
Yeah, when you say the kids, itsounds like like because then he
said, My kids don't want to go,and the kids say her kids don't
know.

SPEAKER_03 (34:17):
He said our kids.

SPEAKER_01 (34:19):
Okay, our kids.
But then she said.

SPEAKER_03 (34:23):
He says, our kids don't want to go.

SPEAKER_01 (34:25):
And um But what did he say she said?
She said about her kids.
She don't want her kids to beaway from their brothers and
sisters.
Then she said, didn't you saythat?

SPEAKER_03 (34:37):
Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_01 (34:37):
Yeah.
You see what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_03 (34:39):
Because the 16 and 17 year olds are hers, not his.

SPEAKER_01 (34:43):
But I thought you said he just had one child that
was over there.
He's just really.

SPEAKER_03 (34:48):
No, he's has two kids that are 11 and 9, and she
has a 15 and 16-year-old withher ex.

SPEAKER_01 (34:55):
I just heard one child over there with the ex.
Okay.
Well, it's gonna be a tough one.
She lived without her kidsbefore.
She probably gets ready to moveover there and live with our
D's, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (35:08):
Yeah, it says She's gonna be used to it.

SPEAKER_01 (35:12):
Cabetta said he ain't going nowhere.

SPEAKER_03 (35:14):
Oh, wait, that's wrong.
I'm wrong.
You're right.
Says the dad explained that hehas two kids, 11 and 9, from a
previous relationship, while hiswife shares a 15 or 16-year-old
with her ex.
So they each have their own setof kids.

SPEAKER_02 (35:34):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (35:36):
And he said that his children lost their mom when
they were younger.
So she has been like the momthere, she is like a mom for
them.
But she's not their biologicalmom because they don't have a
mom.

SPEAKER_01 (35:49):
Yeah, definitely I was into those little words.

SPEAKER_03 (35:52):
How they were saying we and she and our and her and
well then that kind of makessense because I mean, even
though I can see why he wouldwant to uproot his kids from
their family, because maybetheir mom's family is there.
Everybody's probably there.
His family is there.

SPEAKER_01 (36:11):
But they've grown to love.

SPEAKER_03 (36:12):
But they've grown to love, and then to take them and
move them to the streets.

SPEAKER_01 (36:16):
Because they're 15, 16.
Yeah.
So that's just for three years.

SPEAKER_03 (36:19):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (36:20):
You're only gonna be because those kids, if they go
to college, they're gone.
Yeah.
So you're just gonna move withthem for three years that you've
missed however many years ofthese kids' life, you know.
So it's like you want to just beon the last part of their life.
And who's to say they evenaccept all of y'all?

SPEAKER_03 (36:36):
And and I'm still the same with you.
How come she doesn't have herkids?

SPEAKER_02 (36:42):
Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_03 (36:42):
Why did she leave her kids with the daddy if she
wanted to be with them so bad?

SPEAKER_01 (36:48):
Yeah.
Yeah.
What brought that on?
So that's why I said she canready to lose buddy.

SPEAKER_03 (36:55):
Yeah, so he said he's divorcing her because he's
not going to move his kids orlive or them to be living
separate lives where she's therewith her kids and he's And he
already wrote it, wrote theletter.

SPEAKER_01 (37:10):
So he done contemplated, should I even
write the letter?

SPEAKER_03 (37:12):
Mm-hmm.
But he was trying to get theopinions of others.

SPEAKER_01 (37:15):
Yeah, he done already wrote it.
He he knows what he's gonna do.
He's gonna he's gonna leave.

SPEAKER_03 (37:20):
I mean, what would you say?

SPEAKER_01 (37:21):
Because the added part when he said he already
heard the kids say they heardthat she's making a plan.
So oh, okay, so she don't wantto hear nothing I gotta say
anyway.
Yeah, that's true.
You know what?
All right, go.
Get on up out of here.

SPEAKER_03 (37:32):
Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_01 (37:33):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (37:33):
And then when his kids don't want to either, why
would you do that to them?

SPEAKER_02 (37:38):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (37:39):
And yeah, and even for him to find, he's gotta find
a new job.
They've got to like change uptheir whole life for like you
said, for for 16-year-old gotone has probably one more year,
and then the 15-year-old twomore years.
So two really two years.

SPEAKER_01 (37:58):
Yeah, yeah, two years, they they gone.

SPEAKER_03 (38:00):
And they're gone, and you've uprooted, you know.

SPEAKER_01 (38:03):
Your whole family, and then now your kids in
Oregon, and one in New York, andyou're in Wichita.
Mm-hmm.
With your same family that couldhave been in wherever they were
before.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (38:15):
And and he would have a lot of resentment towards
her.

SPEAKER_01 (38:18):
And the kids would have a lot of resentment towards
her.
Oh, yeah.
Because now they said the verything that you brought us to get
close to is gone already.
Mm-hmm.
And now the friends we had, westarting all over with new
friends, and we had friends forX amount of years.

SPEAKER_03 (38:32):
And then on top of that, you there, I'm sorry, but
being a a mama to kids thataren't your kids and your kid,
your real kid somewhere else.
That's just trifling.

SPEAKER_01 (38:45):
Yeah, it's it's a it's a problem something, you
know.

SPEAKER_03 (38:48):
It sounds like she might be.

SPEAKER_01 (38:49):
Unless she's tried, unless she, whatever reason, she
couldn't get her kids, and she'stried a lot to get her kids, and
now it's finally they're like, Imean, she still don't have them,
but at least she can move to theneighborhood.

SPEAKER_03 (39:00):
I mean, but the thing about it was she should
have stayed in the area.

SPEAKER_01 (39:04):
Yeah, because those are not her kids.
So she actually should have beenlike, I love my kids more than I
love this man.
Yeah.
So I'm sorry, I I love you, butyou know, these are what I've
carried, so I have to find alife closer than them.

SPEAKER_03 (39:20):
Mm-hmm.
If they were important, shewould have stayed in the area.

SPEAKER_01 (39:24):
Yeah.
The odds are in her favor tofind another significant other
before she finds two kids out ofher womb.

SPEAKER_03 (39:35):
Right.

SPEAKER_01 (39:36):
To replace her own kids.

SPEAKER_03 (39:37):
Yeah.
So yeah.
So she she didn't make uh a goodchoice from the j from the
beginning.
From the jump.
She didn't she didn't put herher kids first.
But it's a good one.
And now she wants to put it putit put them first at I mean you
we always pay you parent yourkids, but in regards to them
being minors, now you want toparent them when it's all.

(40:01):
Yeah, when it's only two moreyears to parent.
I mean, you know what I mean?
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (40:06):
I put my stepkids first, and now I'm gonna leap
over them and put my kids first.
And so it's like then I'm gonnabring my hopefully my stepkids
and my husband, you know, followsuit.
It's diff that's difficult.
Yeah, thank God I'm not in thatsituation.

SPEAKER_03 (40:23):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (40:24):
But you know, yeah, that's crazy.
Mm-hmm.
All right.
Let's go to the first email.
This is some stuff I like to umI thought about, you know,
because uh when you're dating,you know, people always have
timelines, right?

(40:44):
How long, you know, when you'redating someone before you can
tell them you love them?
How long dating someone beforeyou can split 50-50 on the meal?
Or how long before dating,before the woman could, you
know, pay for the meal?
Some of y'all out there saynever, but shut up.

(41:06):
Anyway, how long, whatever, youknow what I'm saying?
So those that's what some ofthose questions are.
It should be if that if that isthe first email that have come
through.

SPEAKER_03 (41:15):
Yeah.
Um, it talks about the firstone, it's about bodily
boundaries.

SPEAKER_01 (41:23):
Okay, what'd it say?

SPEAKER_03 (41:25):
So, how long can you date someone before you poop in
their bathroom?

SPEAKER_01 (41:36):
Let's see, it took me, we didn't date long at all,
but uh, it took me, oh Lord.
It was it's probably two monthsbefore I pooped at your house.
And I didn't want to.
I think I got up in the middleof the night and went

(41:58):
downstairs, pooped, and then onedownstairs.

SPEAKER_03 (42:00):
Oh.

SPEAKER_01 (42:01):
Yeah.
Yeah, because I wasn't gonnapoop in your um the one in your
room.
And even when, like when youstayed with me, I would poop in
the my guest bedroom.
I wouldn't poop in my mainbedroom where you were sleeping
at.

SPEAKER_03 (42:16):
I don't even recall when I pooped at your house.

SPEAKER_01 (42:18):
Child, you probably pooped the first time you came
over.

SPEAKER_03 (42:21):
I maybe did because listen.

SPEAKER_01 (42:22):
Because you was a pooper.

SPEAKER_03 (42:24):
When you gotta poop, you gotta poop.
However, I don't I don't evenreally recall.
I don't even know if there islike I don't even know if there
is a specific time or would Inot?
I don't think if it were if Iwere on a first date, I don't

(42:46):
think I'd poop in somebody'shouse on the first date.

SPEAKER_01 (42:48):
The first date.
So what would you do if if youactually had to go and you like,
oh Lord, I gotta, like, I reallygotta poop.
And it's the first date.
I just would have to do it, butI bring you over to my house and
we have like, I have like a nicedinner being cooked that I cook.
Um, you know, we I mean,everything is set out, and all
of a sudden you're just like, ohmy God, why my stomach is

(43:09):
tripping?

SPEAKER_03 (43:11):
I just would have to go.
I would try to hold it.
I mean, I would really try tohold it.
I mean, but if it's the pointwhere I can't hold it, then I
just have to go.
Like, what am I doing?
Doodle on myself.

SPEAKER_01 (43:21):
I'm just saying, would you but some people would
leave, they would cut the dateshort.

SPEAKER_03 (43:24):
How would I leave?

SPEAKER_01 (43:25):
Yeah, some people would cut the date short.

SPEAKER_03 (43:27):
No, no, no, no, no.
I wouldn't leave.
I just would poop.

SPEAKER_01 (43:31):
And then some people would say, Oh, I need to, I know
guys, I've heard guys say, I'llbe right back.
I'm gonna run to the store.
I wanted to grab something else.
I'm so sorry.
And then they go and use thebathroom at like the gas station
or the store or whatever thebathroom.

SPEAKER_03 (43:44):
No, that is so weird.
That has oh Lord.
That I know it.
That has never ever um happenedto me.
So I don't know.
I've never had that umexperience.
I think I probably just would goand probably just like do the uh

(44:06):
respectful flush as to not leavea stench, the courtesy flush, as
to not leave a stench.
But if I had to go that bad, butI don't know.
I guess I've been pretty luckyof like first dates not having
to.
But also, most first datesaren't at someone's house.

SPEAKER_02 (44:27):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (44:28):
Usually you go out to dinner or you go out to do
something.
So if you had to go, it wouldn'tbe a big deal.

SPEAKER_01 (44:36):
Okay, first week.

SPEAKER_03 (44:38):
Huh?

SPEAKER_01 (44:39):
First week.
It may not be, you know, wealready had a first date.

SPEAKER_03 (44:42):
I know I can't say.
I've never, I cannot evenrecall.

SPEAKER_01 (44:45):
Yeah.
But I am meeting somebody fromthe first time at your friend's
house, and then you at yourfriend's house be like, oh
shoot, he's here.
Oh girl, I can't poop in thebathroom right now.

SPEAKER_03 (44:54):
I would.

SPEAKER_01 (44:55):
I'm just one.

SPEAKER_03 (44:57):
Oh no, no, I would.
A friend's house too.
It ain't his house.
That's my friend.

SPEAKER_01 (45:01):
Okay.

SPEAKER_03 (45:02):
So yeah, that wouldn't bother me at all.

SPEAKER_01 (45:04):
No.

SPEAKER_03 (45:04):
Uh-uh.
I believe in if you got to go,you go because if you hold it.

SPEAKER_01 (45:10):
You mold it.

SPEAKER_03 (45:13):
If you hold it, then you might lose your opportunity.

SPEAKER_01 (45:17):
Yeah, that's true.
And then nothing like having uhwanting to go and then you can't
go because you held it too long.
Now you're gonna leave.

SPEAKER_03 (45:26):
And pooping is important to me.
It's important to me too.
It just, you know, like I liketo have a routine.

SPEAKER_01 (45:34):
Yeah, you do.
And for me, coffee, pre-workout,or shopping.

SPEAKER_03 (45:40):
Oh, yeah, shopping.

SPEAKER_01 (45:42):
It's gonna do it.
We start talking about shoppinga lot.
Oh, we oh, I gotta use bathroom.
I'm excited.

SPEAKER_03 (45:50):
That is a fact, Jack.

SPEAKER_01 (45:52):
So what about uh passing gas around somewhere?

SPEAKER_03 (45:56):
Nah, I don't think.

SPEAKER_01 (45:57):
I don't that's we know we know somebody.

SPEAKER_03 (46:02):
My daddy.

SPEAKER_01 (46:02):
No.

SPEAKER_03 (46:03):
Oh my daddy does not care.

SPEAKER_01 (46:05):
What my my brother and his brother and his wife,
what they say, they to this daythey don't.

SPEAKER_03 (46:12):
Oh yeah, they don't poop in front of each other.

SPEAKER_01 (46:14):
Not poop in front of each other.

SPEAKER_03 (46:15):
I mean, not poop, but they don't they won't poot.
They'll leave the room or go tothe bathroom or now listen, up
in this house.

SPEAKER_01 (46:24):
Dangerous.

SPEAKER_03 (46:25):
Everybody.

SPEAKER_01 (46:26):
Dangerous.

SPEAKER_03 (46:28):
Everybody.

SPEAKER_01 (46:29):
Dangerous.

SPEAKER_03 (46:30):
Oh there, you that also is uncomfortable holding in
a poot.
You're not supposed to do that,but you do it in other places to
be respectable.
Respectable.
No, I'm respectful.

SPEAKER_01 (46:47):
If I would have had my um my um septoplasty probably
at the beginning of ourmarriage, I probably would have
divorced her.

SPEAKER_03 (46:56):
Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_01 (46:57):
Because after I got my septoplasty this at the
beginning of the year, right?
Yeah.
No, never no, was it last lastyear?
Oh my God.
I because I can smell everythingnow.
I'm talking about fresh smell,everything.
Thank God for that.
Um for my deviated self-nick.
Who hooked it up?
He got it broken, something likethat.
Never knew.
But anyway, I can smelleverything.

(47:19):
And now, ooh.

SPEAKER_03 (47:21):
Listen, all I'm saying is that, so now on dating
somebody, I can't say when Iwould feel comfortable passing
gas.
That may be a while.
So I I would hold it in.

SPEAKER_01 (47:36):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (47:36):
Um, is what I would do.
It would be a little whilebefore I would feel comfortable.

SPEAKER_01 (47:41):
But I I do know that I was the the uh I uh I'm gonna
say break the broke the ice.
I broke the gas around us, andand I noticed that same probably
20 minutes later, and somebody,ooh, excuse me.
And she was like, oh, thank Godhe probably pooted around me.

(48:02):
Been having all these spoots inme.
But uh yeah, my brother said hedon't do it around his wife, and
they've been married uh long asus.
Yeah, 22 years also.
What please?
They stomach probably all bowls.

SPEAKER_03 (48:13):
I can't even imagine.
I mean, listen, that is, I mean,putin' is a natural thing.

SPEAKER_01 (48:20):
Remember when when uh you were pregnant and all the
little pregnant uh poops?
Oh my lord, they were so bad.
And so I just got and I couldn'tdo nothing.
So remember, was the uh I I gotand I put it on the other side
of the fan.
Oh so she had she was bedridden,she had bed, she was on bed

(48:41):
rest.
And so I just was like, oh, youknow, I'm I'm finna let us, I'm
gonna give her a taste of ownmedicine.
And so she had to sleep withlike the fan on the box fan.
So I put it on the other side ofthe fan.
I knew it was gonna stink too.

SPEAKER_02 (48:54):
And then also you just heard the oh god, good, oh
my god.

SPEAKER_03 (49:02):
And that is not fair because those were hormonal
poots from pregnancy.
I did not have control overthat.
I did not do that on purpose.

SPEAKER_01 (49:12):
Hey, I didn't have control, something was inside of
my body.
Something got in my body andjust said, poo in the fan.
And I did it.
I had to.
All right, give me another one.

SPEAKER_03 (49:25):
Okay, just see.

SPEAKER_01 (49:28):
Because I think it's like categories, too.

SPEAKER_03 (49:30):
Yeah, I'm gonna go to a different category.
All right.
All right, the comfort zone.

SPEAKER_00 (49:36):
Okay.

SPEAKER_03 (49:37):
Um, okay, this is a good one.
When is it okay to wear well,this is not really a good one
for us.
Okay.
When is it okay to wearsweatpants or no makeup around
your partner?

SPEAKER_01 (49:58):
Yeah, for me, it was, you know.

SPEAKER_03 (50:00):
That was your uniform.

SPEAKER_01 (50:01):
Yeah, that was that's how I dress.
You know, I'm P teaching pussy.
Even if I wasn't, I'm gonna wearwhat I want to wear.
Um I like sweatpants.
That's oh my God, that's that'sthe best thing you could buy me
is some wide-legg sweatpantsoversized.
Um, and then for a woman to notwear makeup around me, it's not
an issue.
I don't mind if a woman wearsmakeup.

(50:23):
The only problem I have is forif a woman that has makeup is
that if it gets all over myclothes.
You know what I'm saying?
Like old people, every time theywould kiss you and you had all
that rouge on your shirt or Imean on your on your when they
hug you, and then you got oldfolks right there and have that.

(50:45):
That's that's the only problem.
But I don't care if you wearmakeup, I don't care if you wear
a lot of makeup.
Um, I mean, as long as it's notcaked up makeup, but I'm fine.
No makeup, no hair, I don'tcare.
As long as you're comfortablearound me, and we good to go.

SPEAKER_03 (51:04):
Yeah.
I mean, it doesn't matter to meabout wearing or makeup.
Now I do want to look if you'retaking a picture of me, I do
want to look presentable.

SPEAKER_01 (51:15):
And you know, I don't take pictures, because
even when I you look presentablewhen I take a picture, you don't
like it.
That's why I don't takepictures.
Oh goodness.

SPEAKER_03 (51:22):
I don't think I get I think my mama has um made me
that way.
Should I say?

SPEAKER_01 (51:27):
Or when I take pictures of you, it's like
you'll say, Oh, take a pictureof me.
And then I'm like, okay, cool.
So then I don't I take a picturehow you want to take it, but
then how do what would I alsodo?

SPEAKER_03 (51:38):
Do it uh can't or what is it?

SPEAKER_01 (51:41):
Candid photo.
Candid photo.
Because I want to see you how Isee you.
And that's what makes me saythat you're that's that's where
I see the beauty.
It's when you're not trying topose to look beautiful and make
a face and make a thing.
Cause I think that you'rebeautiful in your natural aura.
So when when I'm saying, okay,oh, so today is a good day to

(52:03):
take pictures.
So those are the pictures that Ilike to take.
And those are the ones that likeI put on my screensaver on my
phone, or I just lick, you know,keep saving them.
Or those are ones that I send toyou and be like, oh, that is a
good picture.
And I like, yeah.
You know, let it ride.
See you through my lens.
But I like I like when you whenyou uh have on a good pair of

(52:26):
sweats, uh, you know, sweats,uh, uh, an old t-shirt with no
bra.
Oh man and the sweats a little alittle a little low.
Predict.
No, no.
I'm talking about me.
Oh, you pregnant.
Yeah, it might get pregnant.

(52:47):
Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_03 (52:48):
So, yeah, I don't, I mean, I don't think that there's
like um there's never that's notbeen a time frame for me.
Yeah.
I like comfy.
Um don't do nothing days withsweats and a t-shirt and and
yeah, no makeup and just I mean,oftentimes that is how I prefer

(53:11):
to spend my weekend, to behonest.
This guy likes to get out andabout.
So if we get out and about, thenI have to get dressed.

SPEAKER_01 (53:20):
Child, we out and about.
I got on sweats, t-shirt, andtennis shoes.

SPEAKER_03 (53:24):
Yes, but I don't get dressed dressed, but I still
have to have a certainpresentable.

SPEAKER_01 (53:30):
She don't have to, she feels like she needs to.

SPEAKER_03 (53:34):
I do.
I just feel like I just need tobe presentable.
It is not anything extra.

SPEAKER_01 (53:38):
And she's still presentable.

SPEAKER_03 (53:40):
It's not anything extra, but I just feel like I
have to be presentable.
So, but for me, being at homeand like you said, in sweats,
t-shirt, no bra, that.
She could go to the like thatall weekend.

SPEAKER_01 (53:57):
She could go to the store, like she said, she could
go to the store with t-shirt.
I got to put a bra on.
I mean, if she wants to put abra on, I don't mind.
Cause, hey.
I don't mind.
But she could have on thesweats.
She could, if she worried abouther hair, she could put on a
ball cap.
I got plenty of caps.
Days like that when she's justlike the I don't give her

(54:19):
mentality is is like is evensexier because then she's like,
let's go.
It's it's it's brave.
If she's like, boom, this okay,here I am, you know.
So I mean, but that's just me.
That is just you, but I take herany way she's comfortable with
being taken.
Oh Lord, but you know, I justwant her to feel real

(54:42):
comfortable that she can dothat.

SPEAKER_03 (54:44):
I know I can.
I know how you would prefer forme to go out throwing a belt and
do it that way.

SPEAKER_01 (54:49):
No, I wanna, I don't, like I said, I it's
either or, but you it's it's nota big I mean it is it is a big
deal for you.

SPEAKER_03 (54:59):
Yes.

SPEAKER_01 (55:00):
But to me, and I'm and this is just me talking, I'm
never saying, well, you ain'thurt.
No, it's not, well, it's notIt's not a big deal, is what I'm
saying.

SPEAKER_03 (55:07):
No, it's not also a big deal to me.
If I'm just going to the grocerystore around the corner, I will
do that.
I don't have to get dressed,dressed to go to the grocery
store.
If we're gonna go out and have afew errands to run, then I know
we're probably gonna stop andget something to eat, where I

(55:27):
know it's gonna be like multipleplaces that I'm gonna get
presentable.

SPEAKER_01 (55:32):
Okay, for example.

SPEAKER_03 (55:33):
I'm gonna get presentable.

SPEAKER_01 (55:34):
You don't have to worry about your eyes because
you got them, what you call,3D'd or whatever.

SPEAKER_03 (55:38):
I got um micro, what is it called?

SPEAKER_01 (55:41):
I don't know, child.
3D.

SPEAKER_03 (55:43):
Micro needling, like my eyebrows.
I got my eyebrows uhpermanently.

SPEAKER_01 (55:48):
Okay, so that eliminates a lot of time.

SPEAKER_03 (55:51):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (55:52):
Alright, so like you there'll be days when you say,
uh, okay, look, we just gonnago.
I'm gonna put on a quick lip andlet's go.
When she just put on her littlequick lip, man.
Like it to the to the naked eye.
Like, and I know she ha I knowhow she looks with makeup and
without makeup, but to me,honestly, she don't look any

(56:16):
different.
You know what I mean?
It's still beautiful.
That's what I'm saying.
Like you can have makeup andyour makeup could be a 10.
So, ooh, girl, that makeup wasbomb.
But then you can have a quicklip on.
And I'm still looking at youlike, that's my wife right
there.
That's my wife.

(56:36):
It's like, but I know it's yourpersonal preference.
But I just want you tounderstand that if you have to
go out, people will still seeyou and be like, oh my God,
she's beautiful.
You know?
So just you know.

SPEAKER_03 (56:52):
I also don't like to be limited because this guy will
take you, we'll go someplace,and then we'll end up someplace
that we were not expecting tobe.
And then if we want to go eat ata certain place, I also want to
be presentable for certain.

SPEAKER_01 (57:05):
I'm not gonna take you to eat nowhere where you
can't where you're expecting tobe able to do it.
No, not even like for But you'restill gonna be presentable,
girl.
You still gonna look good.

SPEAKER_03 (57:13):
Okay, all right, moving on.

SPEAKER_01 (57:16):
Tele TV land, they T or Phone Land.

SPEAKER_03 (57:19):
I was gonna say they TV land or radio land.

SPEAKER_01 (57:22):
Land land.
Yeah.
Give me a nerd one.

SPEAKER_03 (57:25):
Okay.
Um, we don't know about this, sothis we'll have to use.
Let's go.
We don't know about a lot ofstuff, but we talked about it.
Let's go.
Come on.
We'll have to use otherpeople's.
Come on.
All right.
When can you post them on socialmedia without it being in
quotations too soon?

SPEAKER_01 (57:49):
That's I mean, when we had social media, sometimes
you still have to be like, ah,don't post that.
I'm post so you gotta kind ofknow.

SPEAKER_03 (58:01):
When can you post them?

SPEAKER_01 (58:02):
But it's still it's couples that don't like they the
other don't post them.
Like, you don't post me.
Well, that is true.
There are couples that way.

SPEAKER_03 (58:10):
That is true.
Why why do you think they justhave that private maybe?

SPEAKER_01 (58:16):
Yeah, they're private.

SPEAKER_03 (58:17):
And they've married somebody who isn't as private,
maybe an introvert andextrovert.

SPEAKER_01 (58:21):
Yeah.
Or maybe somebody don't you uhand oh what?
Like you told me don't postbecause you didn't approve of
the picture.
Why'd you post that picture?
I don't like that picture.
Take that.

SPEAKER_03 (58:34):
This just means the person over here.

SPEAKER_01 (58:35):
But I'm just saying.

SPEAKER_03 (58:36):
Yes, if there's a certain picture, I don't like
it.

SPEAKER_01 (58:38):
But if it's a couple or dater people, I would say
that the limit depends on theother person.
Like it has to be all the time.
Like if I want to, if I if I goout on a date, say, hey, first
date, is that too soon?

SPEAKER_03 (59:03):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (59:04):
But think about it.
But yeah, maybe for you.
But what if you are a personthat's out there and you're
telling your people, yeah, I'mtrying something new.
I'm trying to, I want to go onthis first date, y'all, and
let's see what happens.
You know how people are kind ofnot necessarily influencer, but
their life is already in themedia, right?
And so they go out on this date.

(59:25):
Oh, sorry, okay.
And they want to share it withtheir whoever their followers
are, other people, because oh,everybody's, you know, my family
out there, internet family.
And you say you want to post itum, shoot, the next day.
Mm-hmm.
Will that be too soon?
It depends on the other person.

(59:46):
Because he may be cool or shemay be cool with it.

SPEAKER_03 (59:49):
Yeah, I guess every I guess thinking about being
careful with it is likeeverybody has their own version
of what a date means.
Right.
So we could go on a date, butfor some people, a date is just
a date.
And then for some people, like,ooh, they dating.

SPEAKER_01 (01:00:08):
No, like But you can't worry about all that.
I mean, you can't.

SPEAKER_03 (01:00:12):
So I think that's why people are so like cautious
about when to post or what,because once you do that, then
you're giving room for publicopinion.

SPEAKER_01 (01:00:25):
But if you and the person Perception and public
opinion.
You are a poster.

SPEAKER_03 (01:00:30):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (01:00:31):
And you want to post a person.
What are you going to do?
You're going to ask them, can Ipost you?

SPEAKER_03 (01:00:36):
Yeah, I would ask.

SPEAKER_01 (01:00:38):
Okay.

SPEAKER_03 (01:00:38):
And then I would ask the person if I wanna, if I
were, if I was gonna post themor felt like I wanted to.
But personally, for me, if Iwere dating.

SPEAKER_01 (01:00:47):
When would you say?

SPEAKER_03 (01:00:48):
Um, I would not post anybody until uh we were
official, like, like dating.
Like a boyfriend, girlfriend,one-on-one.
I wouldn't post them till thenbecause this is what I'll say
I've done before.
Because I've known people that Iwent to college with or high

(01:01:10):
school or whatever.
One week they they keep postingpeople and then you like, girl,
what I mean, my goodness, whereare all the people, you know,
like it just it's just too much.
And it's it's like really nopoint in it.
It's almost like it'll be almostlike if you meet somebody and
you think, oh, this might be afriend, and you're like, Y'all

(01:01:33):
look, I might have a new friend.
I'm post my new, my possible newfriend.
Like, so it's just it's just toomuch.

SPEAKER_01 (01:01:40):
So so if you're dating multiple people, should
you date them in public?
I mean in private?
What do you mean?
So let's say you're you're inyour dating phase and you may
have four dates this week.

SPEAKER_03 (01:01:51):
I think as long I don't so you're gonna post all
the people?

SPEAKER_01 (01:01:54):
No, you're saying don't post them.
So I'm saying, but if you'redating four people, yeah, should
I date them, make sure I'mdating them where everybody is
not gonna see me because I don'twant them to say, what are you
doing?
This is your you dating allthese people.

SPEAKER_03 (01:02:08):
I think if you're dating, I think if you're like
openly dating and you're datingfour people, it is fair for all
those people to know that youaren't with, you know, I'm not
exclusively dating you.

SPEAKER_01 (01:02:23):
But I'm saying you when you said them posting
people, who are you talkingabout?

SPEAKER_00 (01:02:30):
What do you mean?

SPEAKER_01 (01:02:31):
You said so if you're posting all these
pictures of you of you dating,all these people, who who were
you talking about when you'resaying, girl, what are you
doing?
What is going on?

SPEAKER_03 (01:02:39):
Oh, just your I guess it would be the people
that are that are your friendsor following you.

SPEAKER_01 (01:02:43):
Okay, so those same people that are friends or
following you, that friendsmaybe in the neighborhood,
friends out in the public, andthey see you on an on another
date.
I just saw you, you know, you'rein a college town, everybody's
out every night.
So four nights in a row, you'reon a you're on a date with a
different person.
Should I date?
Uh if I'm going out on a f uh adate with a different person,

(01:03:06):
should I go somewhere where I'mhopefully not gonna see the same
people?
Because what's the difference inthem seeing me in person?
Because you're not gonna see allthem.

SPEAKER_03 (01:03:19):
You're not gonna see all however many followers you
have of people when you go outon a date with somebody.
I mean, that's just that's justdifferent.
And to me, I guess it is I guessit just depends on who you are
and how you post.
Um and if you're a person whoposts a lot and your entire

(01:03:48):
life, then maybe that wouldn'tseem odd to people.

SPEAKER_01 (01:03:52):
I guess also it's you gotta understand who am I
dating for?
Am I dating for other people?
Am I dating for you and I?

SPEAKER_03 (01:03:57):
Well, if that's the case, then why everybody got to
know?

SPEAKER_01 (01:04:00):
I don't know about it.
It's a lot of stuff that we alot of stuff that I post for.

SPEAKER_03 (01:04:04):
Why why do why would you need to post every every
person you go on a date with?
Why?

SPEAKER_01 (01:04:10):
I don't know.
Well, exactly.

SPEAKER_03 (01:04:12):
Why do you need to do that?

SPEAKER_01 (01:04:14):
Why do you need to post anything?

SPEAKER_03 (01:04:16):
Well, for some posts are so I like to celebrate my
family, and I like to people tosee my family and some fun
things that we did togetherbecause I think it's pretty
cool, and I want other people tosee some of the fun things.
I want people to see, oh, it wasmy birthday.
Look how fun, much fun I had onmy birthday.

(01:04:39):
It was a good time.
Share my joy.

SPEAKER_01 (01:04:42):
Look, it's my birthday.
Share my joy.
Look, I'm out on a date.
It's my birthday week.
I'm a Capricorn.

SPEAKER_03 (01:04:48):
Well, we're going to have to agree to disagree.
I don't think you need to postevery person you're dating with
that.

SPEAKER_01 (01:04:56):
We just disagreed.

SPEAKER_02 (01:05:00):
No.

SPEAKER_03 (01:05:01):
Anyways, what y'all think?
You go on a date, you need topost everybody you dating.
That's dumb.
Okay.
Don't do that.
Don't do that.
Also, don't go dating somebodyfor a whole year and you out on
vacations or out to dinner, andwe know it's somebody on the

(01:05:25):
other side because you want usto know you out on a date, but
then you're like you holding thecamera.
You never show the person.
Like, then don't show a pictureof that event.
Cause maybe they want us to belike, ooh, who they with.
Maybe that's the reason for thepost.
That's the thing.
They want us to say that.

SPEAKER_01 (01:05:41):
That's part of it too.
And the other part is thatperson just don't want you to
know their business.

SPEAKER_03 (01:05:49):
But they want you to know they're out to dinner.
Yeah.
But don't know with I'm nottelling you with who.

SPEAKER_01 (01:05:53):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (01:05:56):
To each his own.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (01:05:58):
Look at this trip I'm on.
We know you're on it withsomebody, but they just want you
to see them on the trip.

SPEAKER_03 (01:06:05):
I think a trip is fine.
But I think it's kind of weirdwhen you're like at dinner and
then But a trip is the samething.

SPEAKER_01 (01:06:12):
You in you in Paris.
Oh, that's true, I guess.
All the way in Paris.

SPEAKER_03 (01:06:16):
Well, not I'm not talking, I'm talking about a
dinner at Chili's.

SPEAKER_01 (01:06:24):
Yeah, if it's not if it's not a view from the like
this, and but the view is alwaysyou holding the burger with both
hands.
Or you see the glass cheering.

SPEAKER_03 (01:06:37):
Or you can see a little bit of a shadow.

SPEAKER_01 (01:06:38):
Yeah.
Or you just see the anotherglass touching your glass
because you're toasting.
Yeah.
And we're like, come on now.

SPEAKER_03 (01:06:46):
Who you with?

SPEAKER_01 (01:06:47):
Yeah.
Well, but that's hey.

SPEAKER_03 (01:06:50):
But that is it.

SPEAKER_01 (01:06:51):
To each your song.

SPEAKER_03 (01:06:52):
To each your song.
That that you do what you do,boo-boo.

SPEAKER_01 (01:06:55):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (01:06:56):
So okay.

SPEAKER_01 (01:06:58):
But I mean, it's sad that you got a person that don't
want that don't want to be seenwith you.

SPEAKER_03 (01:07:02):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (01:07:04):
Because if I'm with you, you better show.

SPEAKER_03 (01:07:07):
Show me.
Show me.
That's what I say.

SPEAKER_01 (01:07:10):
Better show me.

SPEAKER_03 (01:07:11):
You can't show me, brother.
Then I know something.

SPEAKER_01 (01:07:15):
You supposed to want to show me off.
You supposed to want to.
It should be pictures where yougot me in a headlock, put
putting me in the picture.
That's how much you should wantto show me off.
He's like, he is so good to me.
I'm going to stick beside him.

SPEAKER_03 (01:07:30):
Stick beside him.

SPEAKER_01 (01:07:31):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (01:07:32):
Okay.
The staying over round.
Okay.
When can you sleep over andactually stay till morning?
Not the leave at 2 a.m.
version.

SPEAKER_01 (01:07:51):
Oh, I thought you were talking to somebody else.
I thought you was trying to tellthem folks.
We don't do the spin the nights.

SPEAKER_03 (01:08:00):
We don't do the spinning nights in the sound.

SPEAKER_01 (01:08:02):
We don't do the spending nights over here.

SPEAKER_03 (01:08:04):
But when we were dating, I it doesn't.
I don't.
I guess there are people thathave rules.

SPEAKER_01 (01:08:16):
Yeah, I grew up in those rules.

SPEAKER_03 (01:08:18):
No, I'm not talking, I'm talking, we ain't talking
about.

SPEAKER_01 (01:08:20):
So we no, we don't do the spending nights at our
house.
Um but uh I would say, um,shoot.

SPEAKER_03 (01:08:28):
Yeah, like I that's what I was saying.
I'm like, I wasn't um like youknow, people have certain rules
or when they were dating, likewhen somebody can stay the night
or something.

SPEAKER_01 (01:08:40):
You got a one night stand, but that ain't dating.
That's screwing.
Sometimes they stay tonight.

SPEAKER_03 (01:08:46):
Yeah.
So I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 (01:08:48):
So I guess bring your bag though.
What about bringing your bag?
Because sometimes stay tonight,you just up to talking to the
middle night and fall asleep onthe couch.

SPEAKER_03 (01:08:55):
When can you sleep over and actually stay till
morning?
I guess that would be moreplanned.

SPEAKER_01 (01:08:59):
Planned, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (01:09:00):
Like a planned sleep over.

SPEAKER_01 (01:09:02):
Um I guess it also depends on how long have you
known the person before dating.

SPEAKER_03 (01:09:08):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (01:09:08):
So let's just say if if you'rejust a date that, hey, my
friends hooked this is our firstdate, okay, and then we go out
on another date.
I would say uh, because nowyou're talking on the phone, how
comfortable do you feel with theperson?
Um, man, you never know.
It could be the first week.
It could be, you know, if youlive in the name of if you run

(01:09:31):
circles with everybody.
Yeah, if you know them that way.
If you know them well.
But if it's a stranger, man, Isay give it, I say give it a
minute.
If you met them online, if youmet them on the app, uh man, I
say give it a minute.
You know, don't just go, youknow, and be with them.
Uh just staying at night becauseyou can get caught up, and next
thing you know, you never knowwhere you're waking up at, you

(01:09:52):
know.

SPEAKER_03 (01:09:52):
Yeah, I've I forget all the new ways of dating that
they have and options and thatcan be um scary.
Or you get somebody that youcan't get to leave.

SPEAKER_01 (01:10:01):
Yeah, yeah.
They squatting you how you letyourself out.
I'm going to work.
Next thing you know, you comeback, all your stuff, the locks
change, and they done got uhpaperwork in their name and you
don't have a house no more.

SPEAKER_03 (01:10:15):
I'm certain that's probably happened to someone.

SPEAKER_01 (01:10:18):
Yep.

SPEAKER_03 (01:10:19):
So yeah, you just have to be um real careful.
And I don't know, I think if Imet somebody that was online or
dating app, gosh, it'd be quitea few dates just out.

SPEAKER_00 (01:10:34):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (01:10:35):
Um, before I they even knew where I lived.

SPEAKER_00 (01:10:38):
Of course, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (01:10:39):
Um, is what I would, I mean, that would just make me
a little bit uncomfortable if ifI had no other people who knew
them or connections to make tomy people.

SPEAKER_00 (01:10:51):
Very true.

SPEAKER_03 (01:10:52):
You know, so um that would be so if I had to decide
how many dates, and I don'tthink it is even about how many
dates, I think it would have togo with my comfort and my gut
and what my intuition says aboutthis person and where I want,

(01:11:13):
how far I want this thing to gowith this specific like person,
yeah, and whether or not um,because to me, a 2 a.m.
I don't I don't know thedifference.
I mean, you could stay like asgrown people, right in your own
place.

SPEAKER_02 (01:11:33):
Right.

SPEAKER_03 (01:11:33):
You can stay, you could stay the night and leave
at 7 in the morning, or you canleave at 2 a.m.
So I mean, I don't know how todo it.

SPEAKER_01 (01:11:41):
It just depends on when you get sleepy, because if
I get sleepy, I don't know howdifferent and I don't want you
staying over the you know myhouse, then it's time for you to
go.

SPEAKER_03 (01:11:49):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (01:11:50):
You know, if I want if I ain't worried about you
like being look, I ain't finnaput you on the couch.
I want to be in my bed bymyself, so I don't want to be
rude, so it's time to leave.

SPEAKER_03 (01:12:00):
So do you think in this question they're saying it
intimacy?

SPEAKER_01 (01:12:04):
Like No, it just says stay in the night.
Because you know, some peoplefeel like they could just stay
the night.
They may be on a six-month rulebut still stay the night with
somebody.
Let's just sit lay on the couchand cuddle.
Cuddling is is not comfortablefor the man anyway.

SPEAKER_03 (01:12:18):
Cuddling is not comfortable for anybody.

SPEAKER_01 (01:12:21):
Well, you because you're having hot flashes.

SPEAKER_03 (01:12:23):
I like to cuddle at the beginning.

SPEAKER_01 (01:12:26):
And we can cuddle, but then at some point we start
cuddle, and then do you y'alldon't know how how fast your arm
goes to sleep when a uh uh I'llfinna say an eight-pound head is
on, but your head probably aboutsix and a half pounds.

SPEAKER_03 (01:12:44):
Yeah, lower it.

SPEAKER_01 (01:12:45):
Yeah.
When it's on your arm, it goesto sleep fast.
So that's not comfortable.

SPEAKER_03 (01:12:52):
Yeah, so that's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_01 (01:12:53):
Like, it's after it's it's But some people be
like, I just want to cuddle.

SPEAKER_03 (01:12:57):
Oh no, no.
I'll cuddle for a little bit,but then when I'm ready to go to
sleep, then I'm rolling over andI'm going to sleep.

SPEAKER_01 (01:13:05):
Or go home.

SPEAKER_03 (01:13:06):
Or go home, whatever.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (01:13:07):
If you're going to sleep, what's not.

SPEAKER_03 (01:13:09):
Well, if you're going to sleep, yeah, you might
as well just go on home.

SPEAKER_01 (01:13:11):
Might as well go home.
Now, if you stay a long waysaway, then you should already
have made plans.
If you stay a long ways awayfrom me, and I know I don't want
you staying over that night.
So when it gets late, I'm gonnabe like, okay, well, it's
getting late.
I'm gonna get on and get you onthe road so you're not too
tired.
I'm gonna tell you that forreal.

SPEAKER_03 (01:13:32):
Because there will be people that play games.

SPEAKER_01 (01:13:34):
Oh, it's so tired.
I can't feel like driving backon that road.
I got some red bull in there.
You want to get some red bull?
That's what I'll do.

SPEAKER_03 (01:13:41):
Yeah, they'll try to play that thing.

SPEAKER_01 (01:13:42):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (01:13:43):
I'm so tired, you want me to leave?
Or or they might be like, oh,oh, I just had too many drinks.

SPEAKER_01 (01:13:49):
Drinks.
Or the other you're trying toget rid of me.
Yes.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (01:13:56):
And is.

SPEAKER_01 (01:13:57):
And will.

SPEAKER_03 (01:13:58):
Yes.
So even for that, I think it'sdepending on you and how how you
how comfortable you are.
No, I'm thinking nowadays, likeback when we were dating, it
wasn't Uber wasn't a thing.
I mean, you could call a taxifor somebody.

SPEAKER_01 (01:14:10):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (01:14:11):
But now you could just call somebody Uber.
You had too much drinking.

SPEAKER_01 (01:14:13):
Yeah, yeah, they live close by.
Or call your Uber.
Call your Uber.
Yeah.
You live close by, call yourUber.

SPEAKER_03 (01:14:20):
Yeah.
Call your Uber and get your getyour little self-home.

SPEAKER_01 (01:14:23):
For sure.
For sure.
Yeah.
All right.
So let's go ahead and wrap itup.
Okay.
Um, let's uh let's do side eyeof the week.

SPEAKER_03 (01:14:33):
All right.
Um you have your side eyeprepared?

SPEAKER_01 (01:14:36):
My side eye is uh I I I uh it's it's about my job,
so I'm not gonna do that becauseI don't know who listens and who
doesn't listen.
But uh uh I'm not a I'm not aI'm not a uh idiot.
And I see things.
Oh and I see things.
You know what I'm saying?

(01:14:58):
People try to play me, but theycan't play me.
Just understand, I see you.
If you out there, or you if youlisten or watch and you know
somebody that knows somebodythat know what they're doing,
I'm I'm watching you.
That's my side eye, for real.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (01:15:17):
Now you watching people.

SPEAKER_01 (01:15:19):
That's right.
Yeah, but it's all good.
It's all good.

SPEAKER_03 (01:15:24):
I got two side eyes, and they're for my children.

SPEAKER_01 (01:15:27):
Go ahead, side eye.

SPEAKER_03 (01:15:28):
Okay, the one side eye is for as long as we have
lived in this house.

SPEAKER_01 (01:15:39):
Go ahead.

SPEAKER_03 (01:15:40):
Uh how many years is that?

SPEAKER_01 (01:15:43):
Uh we're at four, is it 14?
No.
We got the house in 2013.
So it's 2025, 12 years, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (01:15:52):
12 years.
Our trash has always beenMonday.
Monday.

SPEAKER_01 (01:15:59):
Yeah.
Well, take that back.
The first was like uh the thefirst people the day I was like
on a maybe Tuesday, I will say.
But that was only for two years.

SPEAKER_03 (01:16:10):
Okay.

SPEAKER_01 (01:16:11):
But I did it then because they were too little to
even carry the trash.

SPEAKER_03 (01:16:14):
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay.

unknown (01:16:17):
Okay.

SPEAKER_03 (01:16:18):
So we've lived uh ten years with the tra with the
traffic.
Trash.
With the trash.
Anyways, side-eye my childbecause he act like he cannot
remember bringing that trash canaround to the back on the
Monday.
So we got a strategy for him.
We're not gonna say it.

SPEAKER_01 (01:16:38):
No.

SPEAKER_03 (01:16:38):
But we're gonna do it.

SPEAKER_01 (01:16:39):
And we'll let you know.
We'll let you know.
Chances are it's gonna happenagain.

SPEAKER_03 (01:16:43):
Mm-hmm.
So we got a plan for that.
The other side eye, um, soKimani came home.

SPEAKER_01 (01:16:48):
We shared last time that he got to um um meet um one
of the top one of the five blackSomaliers.

SPEAKER_03 (01:16:58):
Uh masters, master somaliers Somaliers in the
world.

SPEAKER_01 (01:17:00):
There's only five master somaliers.
Black Master Somaliers.

SPEAKER_03 (01:17:03):
Um, gosh, his name is Chris Gaither.

SPEAKER_01 (01:17:06):
Yeah.
Uh-huh.
Chris Gaither.

SPEAKER_03 (01:17:07):
Um, Morehouse grad um works for Brown Estate.
Um, that's one of the first uhblack-owned wineries in Napa.
In Napa.
There are more now, but theywere one of the very first full
full winery and venues.

SPEAKER_01 (01:17:24):
So a lot of people may have the storefront, but
they don't actually have likegrow their own grapes and
produce their own everything.
But they do.
Yeah, they produce, grow, sell,distribute everything.

SPEAKER_03 (01:17:35):
So anywho, um Chris Gaither had an event.
He had several events here inthe Atlanta area.
Um and so Kimani got a chance togo to one of the tasting events
and to uh meet him and do allthe things.
So he came home Thursday.

SPEAKER_02 (01:17:50):
Get inspired.

SPEAKER_03 (01:17:50):
Get inspired.
Yeah, he wants his goal is to bea master Somalier.
Um, so anywho, he um came homeThursday.
Um and then I was, you know, ofcourse, sick and on Saturday.
Um, I think it was Saturday thathe left, right?
Yeah, yes, and normally he stayswith us till Sunday.
So I'm giving him the side eyebecause he left on Saturday, and

(01:18:15):
so I was like, oh, I guess.

SPEAKER_01 (01:18:16):
Yeah, get back to relax.

SPEAKER_03 (01:18:18):
I guess he's getting grown and that drive.

SPEAKER_01 (01:18:21):
You know how we are sometimes.
We go to our parents, yeah, andwe were like, we should leave
the day.
That drive because we weanticipating that drive, and you
want to go ahead and get home.

SPEAKER_03 (01:18:29):
Yeah, so anywho, I felt like he left us a day
early.
Although it wasn't like much wecould do because I probably was
like, she laid up sick, dad'shelped take care of her.
Yeah, but I understand.
Yeah, it wasn't probably a funweekend.
And Kahari worked all weekendbecause it was Talktoberfest.
Yeah.
And by his job, and they werebusy.
So, anyways, it wasn't a uheventful weekend for him.

SPEAKER_01 (01:18:52):
Yes.

SPEAKER_03 (01:18:53):
But he had his event in his.
Yeah, he had his event.

SPEAKER_01 (01:18:55):
That's probably all it was.
He wanted to pop in for hisevent and get up at it, which I
perfectly understand.

SPEAKER_03 (01:19:00):
Anyways, I'm side-eyeing him because he lives
a little earlier.
So, anyways, that those are mytwo side eyes.

SPEAKER_01 (01:19:08):
So, what are you grateful for?
One thing you're grateful for toleave on positive notes?

SPEAKER_03 (01:19:12):
Um, let's see.
I'm grateful for feeling better.

SPEAKER_01 (01:19:16):
That's good.

SPEAKER_03 (01:19:17):
Um, and grateful that it wasn't something, I
mean, it still didn't feel good.
Like the coffin was ridiculous,but um, just grateful for
feeling better and didn't knockme all the way out.
Like, I still even y'all did myrun on those sick days.
I just went in real quick, gotit done real fast.

SPEAKER_01 (01:19:37):
Real quick.

SPEAKER_03 (01:19:38):
What?

SPEAKER_01 (01:19:38):
Uh Golden, uh I think yesterday was the day he
had to end his street.

SPEAKER_02 (01:19:42):
Why?

SPEAKER_01 (01:19:43):
Because he has fluid on his knee.
So our one of my coworkers, uhDouglas Golden, good friend of
ours, has been running sinceCOVID at least a mile.
So that's what, five years?
About five years every four orfive years, something like that.
Every single day.
Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_03 (01:20:00):
Wow, that's a long time ago.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (01:20:01):
And so yesterday he had to break his street because
he uh his knee was hurting real,real bad.
And like, and I'm talking abouthe's been sick, he's been
everything still running atleast a mile.
So for several years.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (01:20:14):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (01:20:15):
Well, sorry about that, but I just made me think
about it.

SPEAKER_03 (01:20:17):
Yeah, I'm just trying to make it to my year,
and then I'll decide what's nextfor next year.
But anywho, I still did it.
Got my little miles done throughbeing sick.
So, um, so I'm grateful that I'mfeeling better and also grateful
that I haven't been too weak notto participate in my goal or

(01:20:38):
been injured where I can't, youknow, do my goal.
So I guess I'm I'm thankful orgrateful for wellness.
And yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (01:20:48):
I'm grateful for, don't take this the wrong way,
but I'm grateful for the factthat you are going on your uh
trip to your conference becauseI know you're excited about it
because this is the first one,but like for you, you know, on
your own, and all the stuffyou've been saying, well, I get
to do this, I get to do this onmy own, I don't have to do this.

(01:21:09):
And I know it's gonna be someexciting stuff that you're gonna
um come home and share.
But I'm really because I justknow like when you're in this
zone, you're getting ready to bea sponge.
You're probably gonna pick up somuch great stuff.
Um, so I'm just excited for thisfor you.
Even though you're gonna begone, you know what I'm saying?

(01:21:30):
I'll be okay.

SPEAKER_03 (01:21:32):
Well, and I think the last time I went on a
conference by myself was 2019,actually.
Right before the world shutdown.

SPEAKER_02 (01:21:40):
Okay.

SPEAKER_03 (01:21:40):
I got to go to Chicago, remember, and it was
the uh national bullyingconference.
It was in Chicago, and I got todo that on my own.
But this is a little differentbecause it it it tie even though
like bullying, of course, isbull counseling, but this um

(01:22:00):
it's just a little differentbecause it really ties into my
role as training this content.
So anyways, um, yeah, so it'llit's it's you know you don't
often get a chance to go by, youknow, yeah to to to do a
training by yourself.
My um supervisor, she was like,she listens to our podcast.

SPEAKER_02 (01:22:22):
Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_03 (01:22:23):
Um and she said, Um, Chris says, I didn't know you
were more alike than I thought.
She's like, I can't believeyou're excited about going on
your own.
She says, because that's how Iam.
I want to go by myself.
I don't want to talk to anybody.
She's like, I thought you wantto talk to everybody because we
went on our conference.
I mean, like you, I said,because I had to talk to y'all.
I can't go on a conference andlike say, I don't want food with

(01:22:43):
y'all.
So I was like, no.
I was like, I had to talk toy'all.
And so I had to be on because wewent together.
Right.
So I'm not the kind of personthat will go with people and
then be like, I don't want tofool with y'all because it's
that, you know.
So it's fun to go to conferenceswith people sometimes and have
that time together with yourcolleagues, but it's also nice

(01:23:04):
to go on your own.
So I'll either or, I'll takeeither or, but it is nice to
have both.

SPEAKER_01 (01:23:10):
Yeah.
So feel good.

SPEAKER_03 (01:23:12):
She was surprised by that.
She didn't, she didn't know.
She thought I was like a socialbutterfly.
And I was like, I really am nota social butterfly, to be
honest.
I that's really not that'sreally not who I am.

SPEAKER_02 (01:23:24):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (01:23:26):
Well, it's been an interesting episode.
All this trying to correct allthis stuff on my phone.
Um it's filled with stuff now.
I gotta up, I mean, download oroffload, that's what I meant to
say.
Offload all the videos.
And a lot of it was from music.

SPEAKER_03 (01:23:44):
That Cinnabon snoring, guys.

SPEAKER_01 (01:23:46):
Yeah, yeah.
That's her snoring.
So uh I'm gonna have to offloadsome videos and photos and all
that stuff onto a flash drive Ibought.
And I probably had to film withthe camera next time.
Okay.
Prayerfully that goes well.
And uh and we'll try to filmwithout the headphones, but you

(01:24:09):
know, we'll we need something toset up so we'll know that the
audio is right.

SPEAKER_03 (01:24:14):
But good thing we did have a mom because we would
have known when it's gonna be.
We would have kept on talking,talking, been like, oh shit.

SPEAKER_01 (01:24:20):
Get all of that.
Yep.

SPEAKER_03 (01:24:21):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (01:24:22):
But let's get on out of here before it stops again.

SPEAKER_02 (01:24:24):
Yes.

SPEAKER_01 (01:24:25):
Uh, thank you guys again for listening to the
Refreshingly Normal Podcast.
Um I can't wait.
The refreshingly normal podcast.
I can't wait till the nextbecause I want to read some of
those questions.

SPEAKER_03 (01:24:38):
Those were those were pretty entertaining
questions.

SPEAKER_01 (01:24:42):
And the other email I sent you too has some real
good questions on that too.
So I can't wait for those twothings.
Um, well, all right, ladies andgentlemen.
Um it's your boy, you'd alreadyknow what it is.
You know, people eat the onethat.

SPEAKER_03 (01:24:56):
Well, according to Cinnabon, it is bedtime.
Yes.
I feel her.
It is.

SPEAKER_01 (01:25:03):
I'm ready to snore too.
So thank you guys for tuning into Refreshingly Normal Podcast.
I am Keithla.

SPEAKER_03 (01:25:10):
I am Kree.

SPEAKER_01 (01:25:13):
And let's see, we see you.

SPEAKER_03 (01:25:16):
Amigos, amigos back.

SPEAKER_00 (01:25:27):
The Refreshingly Normal Podcast.

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