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November 9, 2020 66 min
Support Topic Lords on Patreon and get episodes a week early! ( Lords: * April is @aprilsaur on Twitter. * Freddie is @fwong on Twitter. Topics: * Burger opinions * Revisiting Breath of the Wild * Taking care of a kid for 8 hours a day is making me doubt my chronotype * Dennis asks: "Vtubers" * Micro topics: * Finally, a place for topics. * A podcast that is surprisingly not a BDSM podcast. * Being the best town for chili with spaghetti because nobody else bothered. * A very good part about a hamburger. * The potential utility of a hamburger. * Wanting each bite of a foodstuff to contain every ingredient. * The sleeping baby preventing you from going to Five Guys. * A very specific smell manufactured in New Jersey that does not trigger any kind of nostalgia at all. * Deciding to stop cooking your fries in beef tallow and needing to add a fake scent to get the old smell back. * A burger joint that is the love child of In-N-Out and Dairy Queen. * Rating hamburgers by their mouth hinge requirements. * The ideal order of ingredients in a hamburger stack. * Putting a tomato between the patty and the slice of cheese in a cheeseburger. * Burger crimes. * Becoming convinced that Democrats really ought to be armed. * Years of playing Call of Duty and Counterstrike training you for your role in the revolution. * Years of playing The Sims training you for your role in the revolution. * Whether George Washington was a gamer. * Playing Breath of the Wild long enough to see the cool opening vista and thinking "I definitely don't want to go to these mountains." * A very American Truck Simulator approach to playing an open world game. * Winching yourself out of the mud. * The experience of drawing a map in order to understand your surroundings. * Two weeks worth of photos of your TV. * Trying to distinguish whether a childhood feeling of a video game came from the game design or came from being a child. * Designing puzzles that demand the player take physical notes. * The fun of inconvenience. * Playing D&D and catching the cartography bug. * Capturing the joy of a blank piece of paper. * A game about paperwork. * The video game expanding beyond the executable file you run. * Gambling with the game's demo to change the full game's price. * What it would take to stream Breath of the Wild. * Tiny little leaf people hiding all over the world each hovering with a tiny leaf they spin like a helicopter blade. * Hestu's incredible maraca dance. * Tattooing the entire DK Rap across your back. * An attractive person remaining attractive even when wearing a goofy outfit. * Staying home to take care of your kid and not sending them to daycare during a pandemic. * Changing your sleep schedule from waking up at 11am to waking up at 7am. * Vitamin D: turns out we need it. * Being unable to sleep in even though you used to be a sleeping in champion. * Being tired because it's the end of the day. * Making dinner and becoming a puddle on whatever surface you happen to land on. * Going camping because you have a kid when you would never care enough to go camping if it was just you. * Downloading Youtube tutorials on how to split a log so you can impress your kid when you go camping. * Using digital puppetry to make an anime avatar play video games on Twitch. * Cranking out content 24/7. * Livestreamers taking a vacation and losing 20% of their viewers. * The Tupac hologram except playing Fortnite on Twitch. * Producing a CG animation TV show where all the animation is live puppeteering. * Exhuming Tupac so you can do a body scan for the hologram concert tour. * Indiana Jones except with a really tiny head. * The career prospects of Indiana Jones themed strippers.
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