The Grass Isn’t Greener: Unpacking What It Is We’re Really After

Episode overview

This week we get honest about “the grass is greener” mindset - why we pin our happiness on a new place, job, or relationship, and what changes when we stop outsourcing contentment. We share our own stories of chasing locations (Spain, Europe, Australia), the let-down that followed, and the shift to building an inner baseline of self-worth, gratitude, and presence. The takeaway: greener grass isn’t a postcode - it’s a perspective you carry with you.

Key discussion points

• Location as identity: How tying worth to a city/country kept us restless - and what happened when the shine wore off.
• Hedonic adaptation: Why the high of “new” fades and we start craving the next thing.
• Comparison traps: Social media and “other people’s lives” that subtly drive our desires.
• The big confrontation: Realising “wherever you go, you take you” (and all your patterns) with you.
• Gratitude as an anchor: Practising daily appreciation to feel fuller where you are.
• Choosing from fullness: Dreaming and moving are still allowed - just not to fix you.
  
  
  

Listener takeaways

• Name the feeling you’re chasing. Is it freedom, belonging, purpose, adventure, peace? Explore ways to create that feeling here (e.g., new routine, community, hobby, micro-adventures).
• Do the “under-my-feet” audit. List 5 things that are working right now - people, habits, places, tiny joys.
• Gratitude rep: 3 items, daily. Keep it simple and specific (today’s sky, a text from a friend, a warm cup of tea).
• Comparison check: Limit the scroll that triggers “move/flee” urges; follow accounts that ground you.
• Self-worth prompt: “If I believed I was enough as I am, would I still need this change to feel okay?”
• If you still want the move: Great - plan it from stability, not scarcity. Make a values-based list of what the change must support.
  
  
  

Join the conversation

What’s the “greener grass” you’ve been eyeing—and what feeling is underneath it? Tell us in a DM or voice note. If this episode helped, please follow, rate, and share it with a friend who needs a reframe today.

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Hosts: Aileen Harvey & Julie Fahy

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Disclaimer:

Remember, we’re two friends sharing our personal experiences and discussing everyday challenges. We’re not qualified coaches or therapists, and our content is for general information and supportive conversation only. If you need professional help, please seek advice from a licensed therapist.