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September 9, 2025 44 mins

Ok, but what does ENM really mean? In this episode, I talk with Claire Perelman, a sex therapist, about what ethical non-monogamy (ENM) actually is (and isn't). We talk about different types of ENM (polyamory, swinging, open relationships, solo poly etc), “ethical” matters (consent, clarity, agreements), and how jealousy, anxiety, and attachment styles show up in real life. Claire shares her path to ENM, why opening a relationship won’t save a broken one, and the difference between adding sexual variety vs. building additional romantic bonds. Claire shares tips on what to ask on first dates to vet for real ENM (vs. cheaters), sexual health norms, pacing to avoid emotional whiplash, and how to decide if this lifestyle fits your values and nervous system.

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