A 5-Minute Reset for When You Start Blaming Yourself for Their Cheating
If your brain keeps going back to “What did I do wrong?” after being cheated on by a narcissist — this mini reset is your lifeline.
Today’s Thrive in 5 will help you stop making THEIR betrayal mean something about YOUR worth… and gently bring your power and truth back into your own body again.
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TRANSCRIPT:
Speaker 1 (00:03):Welcome to your Thursday, thrive in five. Your five minute pause from the chaos, the gaslighting and that text you knew better than to reply to take a breath queen. This one's for you. If your brain keeps going back to what did I do wrong or what's wrong with me, this is your five minute reset today, especially after Tuesday's episode, all about why narcissists cheat, right? And not having any guilt. We're going to get rid of that. So the part of you that is still taking responsibility for their betrayal, can we say that again? There's part of you that is taking responsibility for their betrayal is the part we're going to release right now. Alright, so step one, we need to interrupt that mental chaos going on. So say this out loud or in your head, repeat after me. Their cheating was a reflection of their emptiness, not my worth.
(01:20) Right? We are not allowing your brand to keep making their behavior means something about you anymore. We're done. Okay, step two, we're going to ground that nervous system. So let's take a minute here. If you're in a place, you can, if not save this episode or this part for later and place one hand on your chest and one on your belly and you're going to breathe in for four seconds in 1, 2, 3, 4. Hold for two seconds. One, two, and exhale. 4, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Yes. Get it all out. Okay. And as you continue your regular breaths, tell your body, I am safe from their chaos. Now I am safe from their chaos. Now the body needs to receive that message from you, not from them. We want it from them. We want to get validation and answers all the things. No ma'am. We're not going to seek it from them anymore. Alright, now step three, the identity statement. So you are not someone who got cheated on. That's not going to be your identity. You are someone who survived a professional manipulator and more. But we'll keep it just in the basics here, right? That's a very different identity, isn't it? So with that, you can have a mantra of I was never lacking. They were, we're not going to take ownership for their lacking. I was never lacking. They were.
(03:23) All right. Step four, the forward focus. When your brain tries to replay the cheating or compare you to someone else, I want you to pause and say, I don't recycle pain to understand it. There's no more recycling that needs to go on here. There is no new meaning hiding in your old wounds. So we stop going backward to decode people who were not operating in real love the way we think of love and we think about connection is not the way a narcissist does. Okay? So trying to decode why or how, I mean I gave you some reasons why on Tuesday's episode, but playing it all back recycling, it is not how Queen's going to spend their life. No. We can learn it and heal from it. So the power is not an analyzing their betrayal. The power is in protecting your heart going forward.
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