Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 11th September 2026 - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
From the ZM Podcast Network.

Speaker 2 (00:02):
This is Fleshwood and Hayley's Big Pod.

Speaker 1 (00:05):
Brought to you by Chemist Warehouse, the biggest brands at
the lowest prices. Ooh, September 11th. Yeah!

Speaker 3 (00:12):
Happy birthday to my friend whose year birthday was forever tainted.

Speaker 1 (00:17):
By September 11th, although technically the 12th though, isn't it? Well, technically. Well,
technically not, but yeah. Did you see the drones that
recreated the Twin Towers? It was quite beautiful.

Speaker 4 (00:26):
That was nice.

Speaker 1 (00:26):
That was incredible, wasn't it? That was intense, eh? And
then what did you say, Vornay?

Speaker 4 (00:30):
There was one drone up there for every victim. Every
person that died that day. Yeah, there was a drone
up there, which is when you see all those dots
and it recreated the shape of the Twin Towers.

Speaker 1 (00:41):
Yeah, if you haven't seen that, give that a Google.
Pretty insane. Today on the show, big show, we have
a chance... For you to win a couple of tickets
to Bruno Mars again, we'll do that around quarter past,
20 past seven. Yeah. Thanks to BP. Free fuel. Eight o'clock.

Speaker 4 (00:57):
Yep.

Speaker 1 (00:59):
Special guest on the show after eight o'clock.

Speaker 4 (01:02):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:02):
Donald Gleeson from season two of The Paper. Yep.

Speaker 4 (01:06):
We've got limited time with him, but I'd love to
talk to him about his role as General Hux in
Star Wars.

Speaker 1 (01:11):
No time for that. We don't have time.

Speaker 4 (01:12):
And also his role in Peter Rabbit.

Speaker 1 (01:15):
I was a huge fan of his work in Peter Rabbit.
No time for that.

Speaker 3 (01:18):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (01:19):
Also, we're going to jump in the car with Mark. Yeah,
we'll play Mark the date today. The top six on
the way, Vaughan.

Speaker 4 (01:25):
Yeah, top six ways to get laid if you're over
60 is today's top six. The reason being that the
Trade Me owned dating site, after 25 years.

Speaker 1 (01:37):
I saw this. 25 years. I couldn't believe it. Find
someone is shutting down. Do they still do that one?
They own that one, the school. You'd find your school
friends or what was that? Old friends. Do you remember that? No,
I think old friends. I think old friends. I think
old friends shut down. Did that shut down as well?
Old friends, a popular.

Speaker 4 (01:55):
New Zealand social networking site and school reunion site owned
by Trade Me was permanently shut down in January 2016.

Speaker 1 (02:00):
So only a casual 10 years ago. Wow. I guess
you don't need it. Yeah, Facebook, right?

Speaker 3 (02:06):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (02:07):
Okay, next on the show, an Australian woman has had
to prove that she has ears. God, that's hard to prove.
It's not something I've really considered. She's got a hat on.
Why this woman needs to prove she has ears, next.

Speaker 2 (02:20):
The Fletchborn and Hayley Big Pod.

Speaker 1 (02:23):
Now, there is a 36-year-old Australian woman in Australia. That's
where I like to keep my Australian woman. She has
completely baffled the Australian passport office because of her facial structure.
And she has had to prove that she has ears.

(02:44):
What does it.

Speaker 3 (02:44):
Matter to entering a country whether you've got ears or not?
Some people don't have ears.

Speaker 1 (02:48):
I'll show you a video of her. Yeah, they're really
tucked to the side. It's not like she has some
kind of weird big face. No, it's just a normal
woman's face. A normal face, but are they just so
flat and low profile? Spin it so I can see
her ears. Flat and back. They don't poke out at all. Yeah,
they are flattened back. I guess the face just comes

(03:08):
up enough that it just hides the ears.

Speaker 3 (03:10):
Yeah, she's got like fluffy cheeks.

Speaker 1 (03:14):
So her name's Priscilla. She sat down to get her
Australian passport photo taken. And she assumed it would be
quite a quick and painless process over in a few minutes.
But the photographer kept snapping. And for an hour... The
photographer had taken hundreds, what felt like hundreds of photos
of her. She had her hair tied back in a knot.

(03:35):
Do you have to have your hair tied back? No,
mine's down. You don't have to?

Speaker 5 (03:38):
No.

Speaker 1 (03:39):
Okay, so he took a lot of photos, and then
he explained that he just couldn't seem to get the
ears in the photo due to her face.

Speaker 3 (03:48):
But that's her face. That's the face she's going to
be entering. Wouldn't you just get a small... ball of
Blu-Tack and just shove that.

Speaker 1 (03:55):
No, because then when you go to the passport recogniser machine...
They'll be like, whose ears are those? They're going to
be like, why have you got ears now? So she
was at a conch, like getting this done, or some
kind of passport office, or maybe she went into... Because here,
when you get your passport, you don't get your photo
taken at, like, Internal Affairs, right? You've got to get
it done somewhere else. No, you go to the pharmacy
or something. You go to the pharmacy or something. Or AA.

(04:17):
He then, the guy taking the photos, brings over the supervisor.
And the only solution was that she has a signed
affidavit to confirm that she does, in fact, have ears.
Something you probably never imagined having to justify. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (04:35):
Doesn't look like she's got ears in that photo. Out
of the hundreds of photos, that's the best you got.

Speaker 1 (04:39):
Well, that's, yeah. I mean, they tried taking like hundreds
of photos. What about a chunky earring? Yeah, sort of
drag it out. Are you allowed to wear big jewellery?
For passports? I don't know, for religious purposes maybe? They
said that she, they wrote out, this is to attest
that Priscilla Lentini has ears, which I then signed.

Speaker 6 (04:57):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (05:00):
Me too, Priscilla. She said they both laughed about it,
and he assured me that everything would probably be fine.
I'm going to just look at my gorgeous passport photo.
I know. You've got a great passport photo. Yeah, you
can see lobe. I've got lobe hanging down. But again,
like your hair. But the hair's hovering us down. It's
the perfect spy picture, isn't it? Looks like a... Yeah.

Speaker 4 (05:20):
Like you're Russian, but you're... undercover in America in the 80s.
I have the slightest upturned mouth. What was that show called?

Speaker 1 (05:26):
The Americans. The Americans, yeah.

Speaker 3 (05:28):
But yeah, my hair's down and you can only see
like a 10 cent coin size of the lobe.

Speaker 1 (05:33):
Of the lobe, yeah. I don't know, maybe facial recognition
systems struggle when there are no ears. I don't know. God,
I'm so screwed, eh, when this passport photo's on. Oh
my God, you are. You're never getting a passport photo
that good.

Speaker 3 (05:43):
I'm going to have to maybe like hit the pepees
for just like two months.

Speaker 1 (05:47):
Pre-passport. And I'll come off them to get my appetite back.

Speaker 2 (05:51):
Right.

Speaker 3 (05:51):
But just for the, because I've got like check phones
in that one and those have not been around for.

Speaker 7 (05:56):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (05:57):
Since that photo. But then years later when you're still
using that photo, what are you going to have trouble?
I'm just going to have to go like this and
be like, I was hot once. Let me in.

Speaker 2 (06:05):
The ZM Podcast Network.

Speaker 1 (06:07):
Flat spot and Hayley's silly little pole.

Speaker 2 (06:10):
Silly little pole.

Speaker 1 (06:12):
It is so silly, silly, silly that the silly little
pole So the little poll today is, if you could,
would you live forever? Yeah, I would. You had this
thought because you're actually afraid of dying, aren't you? I'm

(06:33):
so afraid of dying, despite how I live.

Speaker 4 (06:38):
It is wild how fancy free you are for someone
so scared of death.

Speaker 1 (06:42):
I just love living. I love life.

Speaker 3 (06:45):
I love new experiences. The idea of not being around
terrifies me. I do know that, you know, vampires, I've
talked to a few vampires when I pitched this.

Speaker 4 (06:55):
Yep.

Speaker 1 (06:55):
And they're like, you've got to watch.

Speaker 3 (06:56):
Everyone you know and love die and kind of knowing
that you'll never go. But man, I just like reinvent
myself again and again and again.

Speaker 1 (07:04):
So there's no way out.

Speaker 4 (07:06):
Say you're like, oh, live forever, and okay, and then
you get, but so, and then you're like, actually, David Seymour,
juice me up.

Speaker 1 (07:13):
Like, give me some of that granny juice. There's no
way out.

Speaker 3 (07:15):
You can't cut your head off. Once you sign the
contract with the devil, you're alive forever.

Speaker 1 (07:19):
This is a hypothetical. No, absolutely no way. And does
your body age in this hypothetical, or do you stay
the same as now? No, you have to stay the
same as now. Ooh, ooh. You stay where you are. Ooh,
I don't know. Can I go back like 10, 15 years? No,
can you choose? Because I never saw back every morning
back then. Yeah, can you choose when you had your
most snatched body? Yeah, snatched. Yeah, 26. Yeah, yeah. This
time last year snatched. Yeah, yeah, yeah, 30. Okay. Well,

(07:42):
given the chance. Death is terrifying. Given the chance, would
you want to live forever? 71% of people said no. Wow. 29%
said yes. Do you think that's just because 71% of
people have just had enough already? They're just like, God,
life's hard enough.

Speaker 3 (07:54):
Well, having spent the day at the hospital the other day,
not for me, visiting someone, I think looking at people
who were closer to death than me, obviously, they look ready.

Speaker 1 (08:04):
Yeah. They look like they're waiting for Jesus to come
down and take them. Take the wheel. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (08:08):
Matt messaged saying, absolutely, the idea that I don't get
to see what cool new things we're doing in 100
plus years gives me FOMO if I start thinking about
it too much.

Speaker 1 (08:16):
Oh, God. Oh, there's the question. Because the earth's going
to explode, right? We've cooked it. And then you're just
floating in space forever.

Speaker 3 (08:24):
And then you can't die because you've said no forever.

Speaker 1 (08:27):
That's going to suck. Be pretty lonely. There's always the
fine print on these wishes.

Speaker 6 (08:31):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (08:31):
That movie Obsession, which I still haven't watched, but I've
seen the bit. I've seen it three times. It looks
about as scary. Yeah, lots of, yeah. Loopholes to the wishy-makes.

Speaker 4 (08:40):
But Matt, on Matt's point, I do always think, well,
I can't die now that I've announced another Star Wars movie.

Speaker 1 (08:45):
That's what I think. The foldable iPhone. Yeah. Yeah, totally.
I hate to miss it. Catherine said, I'm scared to die. Hey,
that's okay. Yeah. That's okay. You won't know.

Speaker 4 (08:57):
The time will come when I want to bow out
in style knowing my kid has done well.

Speaker 1 (09:02):
Said Emma. So she doesn't want to live forever. Yeah, nice, nice.
Set it up.

Speaker 4 (09:06):
Alan said, only if it was as my younger 30-year-old self.

Speaker 7 (09:10):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (09:11):
Yeah. No, you can't go backwards. It's from today. It's
from today. It's where you are today. It's always sore.
It's a new peptide that you inject yourself with. Infinity.
It's called Infinity. Infinity Peptide. Infinity Peptide. Megan said, sounds expensive.

Speaker 7 (09:26):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (09:27):
Right. I hadn't even thought about that. Well, how's about
that biohacker, that weird as hell dude. He doesn't look healthy.
With the sun and he's trying to live for it.
And he's got cancer. Did he give himself cancer?

Speaker 7 (09:37):
No.

Speaker 1 (09:37):
It's not cancer. It's something else, right? No, it's cancer,
isn't it? He was doing it all. He was spending
millions of dollars, wasn't he? But you can't fight. I mean,
the most. The moonlight. You can't fight the moonlight. You
can't fight the moonlight, no. He was diagnosed with autoimmune
gastrosis in May. That's your tum tum. Which is a

(09:58):
chronic rare condition where the immune system mistakenly attacks the
acid-producing cells in the stomach lining. So what happens to
the tummy? So his tummy's eating itself. Oh, no. So he's...
not gonna live forever no so all that like wasted
millions all that millions.

Speaker 4 (10:14):
He should have it whipped out yeah and I just
actually if you could pull down the bed I've got
a little song I wanna play in the background just
cause I think it's nice.

Speaker 3 (10:22):
Yeah actually coyote ugly's getting I think I say this
every time coyote ugly's getting a.

Speaker 1 (10:27):
Rewatch Oh, Kaya Yagley, great. Can't find the Moonlight.

Speaker 4 (10:30):
Leanne Rimes is just going to play in the background
for the rest of this. No, there are some very
special people up there and I want to see them again,
said Rachel. She obviously believes in the afterlife there. I
hadn't taken that into account. Well, I've seen a ghost,
so I don't know where I stand on that.

Speaker 1 (10:42):
I just think that our simulation reboots. And you become
a new character in the Sims world. It's a version
of reincarnation, but it's more computer based. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (10:50):
Brian said, part of me says yes, but if I
didn't have my wife with me, then there's no point.

Speaker 1 (10:54):
Oh, for now. For now, Brian. For now. We're with them.
On behalf of women, we're with them. Yeah, for now, Brian.
For now, Brian.

Speaker 4 (11:02):
Jen, only if my dog can too. Oh, imagine that.
Forever with your animal.

Speaker 3 (11:08):
I've seen a few of those memes that are like,
when you arrive at heaven and they're waiting for you,
your cats and dogs are too many.

Speaker 4 (11:14):
I reckon if you arrived at heaven and all your
pets were waiting for you, the cats would all be
shitty with you that you got other cats.

Speaker 1 (11:20):
Yeah, Buffy would be like, the hell is this? The
dog would be like, yeah. The dogs would be like,
look at this, we've got a group now. We're the
pound puppies. I'm just interested to see if you get
to heaven or hell and everybody knows when you were
playing with yourself because they were watching the whole time.

Speaker 3 (11:34):
Yeah, my cat Shaq's like, Jesus, 2025, bitch, you went crazy.

Speaker 1 (11:37):
We were watching. What did you do with that club
you went to? You are into some things, mate. Yeah.
I didn't even know people did that. That's disgusting.

Speaker 4 (11:49):
Everyone you know and love will eventually be gone and
then you'd also be alone.

Speaker 1 (11:52):
This is my opinion.

Speaker 4 (11:54):
I'm not close with my family, so eventually I'd be
far estranged and I'd just be watching everyone die.

Speaker 1 (11:59):
But you'd make new friends. And they would die too. Yeah,
but then you'd make new ones. Yeah, but Christy said,
how many animals would you lose in that time as well?
A lot of heartache, yeah. But a lot of joy.
Imagine how many times you'd get to fall in love and...
Kate said, I'd actually be happy to go now. I'm 30. Kate,
that's grim.

Speaker 5 (12:16):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (12:16):
I think that's dark.

Speaker 4 (12:17):
That's dark. I do appreciate a dark joke, though. Well,
we asked you if you could, would you live forever?
And 71% of you said, no, thank you.

Speaker 2 (12:27):
The Fletchmore and Hayley Big Pod.

Speaker 1 (12:30):
Well, there's been some research done that the gap between
Netflix seasons, the longer it is, the more it hurts
the people watching it. Like as in the viewer numbers.
So the average, a website called whatsonnetflix.com worked out the
average wait time for a new season on Netflix, 20.7 months. Dude,

(12:54):
we're heading towards. 20 points. So just shy of two years. Yep.

Speaker 7 (12:59):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (12:59):
And you think about like.

Speaker 3 (13:00):
Game of Thrones used to take that long.

Speaker 1 (13:02):
Severance takes that long.

Speaker 4 (13:04):
The first few seasons of Game of Thrones were like,
they were cranking them out one a year, weren't they?

Speaker 1 (13:08):
Yeah, but then they got bigger and better. Yeah. And
that's the thing. Everybody started getting busy. The big, like,
you know, your police procedurals, you know, your trashy TV.
Your sitcoms. They churn that out. It's done quickly. I mean,
obviously it takes a lot of people to make it
in a lot of time, but it's a well-oiled machine.

Speaker 3 (13:26):
You're at five locations that repeat. If you're making something huge.

Speaker 1 (13:30):
And you might not also have big cast members, but
when you've got huge names in a TV show, they've
got to be able to film. They might be shooting
a movie. Because they've got contracts with other things.

Speaker 4 (13:41):
Yep.

Speaker 1 (13:41):
I hate waiting. I hate waiting. I know we were
just talking about Landman. That's going to be delayed or
has been delayed. They've just announced Michael Kelly joining the
cast for the next season.

Speaker 4 (13:52):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (13:52):
But they haven't even started filming. It's going to be
a year and a half.

Speaker 3 (13:56):
I think this is why people take great comfort in
re-watching stuff, which I.

Speaker 1 (14:02):
Do as well. Well, so there's a group called Luminate
have delved into the stats on this. And they say
that a long hiatus of more than 1.5 years for
streaming series leads to reduced audience after the previous season.
So they looked in at different shows. Wednesday, season two,
after a 2.75 year gap from season one, viewership went

(14:26):
down 59% compared to season one. The Night Agent season two,
there was a 1.8 year gap. That was a 47% drop.

Speaker 3 (14:34):
Because I think we just give up, eh? Because you're like,
I don't even remember the last season.

Speaker 1 (14:38):
And then you're like, oh. I can't even bother re-watching
season one. I've kind of got to re-watch it.

Speaker 7 (14:41):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (14:41):
I don't have time. I've moved on. Bridgerton was one
of the few shows, season three managed a two-year gap
fairly well. That was down 7%.

Speaker 3 (14:49):
And the thing with that is you don't really have
to re-watch the season.

Speaker 1 (14:56):
Yeah, because it follows a new couple. Yeah, totally.

Speaker 4 (14:58):
Also, if they take that long and the first episode
doesn't live up to your expectations.

Speaker 6 (15:03):
Mm-hmm.

Speaker 4 (15:04):
You know, the longer it is, the more you're like, well,
I'm expecting a lot here. So they also noted it
wasn't just Netflix. The Lord of the Rings, The Rings
of Power, took a 57% nosedive because that was two
years fans had to wait for the new season.

Speaker 1 (15:17):
I actually packed a shitty because they moved the production
out of New Zealand.

Speaker 4 (15:20):
To London. And you were like, well, screw you. I
liked the first season of that, but it was a
lot to watch. Like, you know, it's a Lord of
the Rings undertaking.

Speaker 7 (15:27):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (15:29):
I never watched the second season. I never watched the
first one. My friend's in it.

Speaker 4 (15:32):
Hmm.

Speaker 5 (15:33):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (15:34):
Jealous. We're jealous. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (15:36):
But you're like, we're waiting for the show. He's also
waiting for season two.

Speaker 1 (15:39):
You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 6 (15:40):
Come on.

Speaker 2 (15:42):
The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Fletch.

Speaker 8 (15:47):
Vaughan and Hayley.

Speaker 1 (15:49):
From the Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley group chat, this is
the top six.

Speaker 4 (15:54):
Well, find someone.co.nz, the trade me on dating sites shutting down.
Did you know this was founded in the year 2000
by a musician called Nigel Stanford?

Speaker 7 (16:03):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (16:04):
And he made it to help his sister find a date.

Speaker 2 (16:07):
Oh, really?

Speaker 1 (16:07):
And then Trade Me purchased it off him in 2001. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (16:12):
Cute story. So it's shutting down. Current users, no new
members can sign up, but existing users can keep using
it until midnight, November 30th, 2026.

Speaker 1 (16:24):
After that date, it'll be closed permanently.

Speaker 4 (16:26):
No refunds on message packs because I think you have
to pay to be able to message more.

Speaker 3 (16:31):
Right.

Speaker 4 (16:32):
Save the contact details of people you want to stay
in touch with and download anything you want to keep
before the shutdown. including that sweet picture of you 15
kgs ago.

Speaker 1 (16:42):
And 10 years ago.

Speaker 5 (16:43):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (16:44):
That you want to use.

Speaker 4 (16:45):
So it just basically wasn't making them any money. They
were just like, let's pull the pin on that.

Speaker 1 (16:49):
I mean, everyone's out there. Everyone's on the apps, right?

Speaker 3 (16:51):
Everyone's on the apps, but it had its time and place.
It was pretty revolutionary when it came out.

Speaker 4 (16:56):
Find somebody and NZ dating, which is still going. I
know the top six ways to get laid now if
you're over 60. Right.

Speaker 1 (17:03):
Do you think that was their client base, the older?
I think so.

Speaker 7 (17:07):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (17:07):
If it's been around for 25 years.

Speaker 1 (17:09):
If they haven't moved on to the apps. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (17:12):
If the apps aren't for you, I've got the top
six places to get laid now if you're over 60.

Speaker 1 (17:17):
Number six on the list, Pickleball. Keeping it tight. Pickleball.
Your parents love pickleball, don't they?

Speaker 3 (17:23):
Yeah, they've been getting into pickleball. I'm keen to kind
of get into the pickleball.

Speaker 1 (17:26):
Yeah, and you know what they say about pickleball players,
always service the balls. Serve the balls. Serve, yeah. Serve,
not service. They always service the balls. Don't forget them.
Don't forget them. They don't forget them. And they're nice
and close in pickleball. They're not... You know, tennis courts
are so far away. Is it hot? You know, what
do I like? Yeah, nice and close. Keeping it tight.

Speaker 4 (17:44):
Number five on the list of the top six ways
to get laid if you're over 60, the local Ryman home.

Speaker 1 (17:49):
Oh, lovely. All those widows and widow-ees. Nice too. They're
nice in there, but swish. Probably loaded and, you know. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (17:57):
They want to get out there and try all that
sex stuff that their vanilla lifelong partners didn't want to.

Speaker 1 (18:01):
Yeah, well, they're, you know.

Speaker 3 (18:03):
And then progressive grandchildren are coming in being like, sorry, Grandma,
you know, I was at the curb last night.

Speaker 1 (18:09):
What kind of curb? Spinning's back, Grandma. The spinning club.

Speaker 4 (18:12):
Number four on the list of the top six ways
to get laid if you're over 60 now that the NZ, sorry,
not NZ dating, the Trade Me Owned FindSomeone.co.nz shut down.

Speaker 1 (18:21):
Aqua aerobics.

Speaker 7 (18:23):
Oh, yep.

Speaker 1 (18:23):
All those ladies taking care of their soft tissues. Amen.
And the water gives the girls buoyancy. A bit of buoyancy.
Whenever I'm in the spa, I'm like, yeah, nice. There
they are again. Thank you. Thank you. Water's density. God,
I remember this.

Speaker 4 (18:37):
Number three on the list of the top six ways
to get laid now if you're over 60.

Speaker 1 (18:41):
Local garden centre. Oh, yeah. Oh, bloody weird. Pick up
a honey. Pick up a honey in the fertilised section.
If you know what I mean.

Speaker 5 (18:49):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (18:49):
Woo.

Speaker 1 (18:51):
Number two on the list.

Speaker 4 (18:52):
Of the top six places to get laid if you're
over 60 with the shutdown of FindSomeone.co.nz, the local cosmetic
surgery waiting room.

Speaker 1 (18:59):
They're already there for a nip, tuck, fold, and scrunch. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Get them on the way in. Instant payoff. Yeah. Instant payoff.

Speaker 4 (19:07):
Yeah, nice. And number one on the list of the
top six places to meet someone if you're over 60.

Speaker 1 (19:12):
Now, where's the bell? Oh, my God.

Speaker 6 (19:16):
There.

Speaker 1 (19:16):
It's to my right. That's so weird. I've got right blindness.
That's an ADHD syndrome.

Speaker 4 (19:20):
Number one on the list of the top six ways
to get laid now if you're over 60 because findsomeone.co.nz
to shut down. Show sponsor, Chemist Warehouse. Nothing says we're
compatible like bumping into them looking at the blood pressure meds.

Speaker 1 (19:33):
Oh, yeah, true.

Speaker 4 (19:35):
Bit of an instant background check there on a house.

Speaker 1 (19:37):
Poison liners. Yeah, poison liners and a Cialis strip. Yeah, lovely.

Speaker 3 (19:42):
And some nice lavender cream for your dry elbows.

Speaker 1 (19:45):
Yeah, soft.

Speaker 4 (19:46):
They're looking after themselves. And, you know, the free Scripps
as well. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (19:51):
That is today's top six. Now, I'm doing a bit
of a shred the old school way. Far out. What,
the calorie count?

Speaker 8 (20:02):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (20:03):
Dude, the calorie count. Like exercising. Walking, yeah. Really love
that meme. I'm going to be the only fat person left.
At this rate? While everyone's on the jabs and yeah. Hey,
like to each their own. We live in the future.
Why not use it? But I don't know. We'll get there.

Speaker 3 (20:19):
Anyway, so yeah, I've been doing a bit of a
shred because I got fat happy, you know, which is great.

Speaker 1 (20:23):
It's the best way to get happy. Relationship happy.

Speaker 7 (20:26):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (20:28):
This is why I'm single. You'd just blow out if
you fell in love. Absolutely. All the eating that you
do because you're happy with someone. Because you're all happy.

Speaker 3 (20:35):
Like, let's go out and celebrate our love. And like, oh,
now I'm more comfortable with good. You've seen me naked
so many times. Like, let's just let it go.

Speaker 1 (20:42):
Well, we're on the shreds.

Speaker 3 (20:44):
And as a result, but you know I need my
sweetie treaties. And I will not live a life where
I don't get to enjoy love.

Speaker 1 (20:50):
Food still. I just refuse.

Speaker 3 (20:52):
So I buy this ice cream from the supermarket. Zilch
ice cream. It's like a lower calorie ice cream.

Speaker 1 (20:59):
I know. I can hear it. You are hearing the
words coming out of your mouth? Yeah, I'm hearing it.
I'm hearing it.

Speaker 3 (21:05):
As long as you can hear it. Just go for
a walk and have a normal ice cream. No, no,
I'm going to buy zilch. So it's just like a
no added sugar ice cream, right?

Speaker 1 (21:12):
Does it taste like shit? No, it tastes really good.
Does it taste like shit?

Speaker 3 (21:16):
There are some that straight up taste like human shit,
but This one is really good.

Speaker 1 (21:22):
Okay.

Speaker 3 (21:22):
So yesterday I was at the supermarket and I topped
up my zilch and I.

Speaker 1 (21:29):
I hate it. Thank God I'm not having a daughter.
Is it artificial sweetener? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 3 (21:34):
Oh, okay, right.

Speaker 1 (21:34):
All that stuff. So screwing my guts, but... No, is it? No,
it's fine.

Speaker 3 (21:39):
No added sugar, nothing beats zilch. I'm on zilch's website. Listen,
I'm not promoting zilch. Have an ice cream. I just
always get zilch and it's yum. And my mum likes
it too, so it's usually my first up. So I
get some zilch, and then I get some fridge cigs,
a pack of Coke Zero, because Mike likes them as well,
the Coke Zeros.

Speaker 1 (21:56):
How do you get your Coke Zeros? So, like a pig,
in cans. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. It's
real nice out of a can, though. It's what? It's
real nice out of a can. No, it's not. No,
but you're in a recession. No, we should do a.

Speaker 4 (22:10):
Silly little poll. What does Coke Zero taste best out of?

Speaker 1 (22:13):
Bottles. Glass. McDonald's.

Speaker 4 (22:16):
No.

Speaker 1 (22:16):
The syrup. It's not in glass bottles. The syrup. The glass.
When you're overseas and you have Coke in a glass,
you're like, this is elite. Bonjour, bonjour. Big plastic bottles.

Speaker 4 (22:25):
So you're 2.25 and you're 1.5.

Speaker 1 (22:27):
That's how I get my fridge things.

Speaker 5 (22:29):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (22:29):
Someone can't be running out. But how much are you,
because you're having it heaps.

Speaker 4 (22:32):
Cans no good. Fountain's okay. Cans the bottom of the
pile when it comes to.

Speaker 1 (22:36):
No. Cracking a can. It's got to be icy cold.
Fridge things have to be icy cold.

Speaker 4 (22:41):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 5 (22:42):
Any soda.

Speaker 1 (22:43):
Otherwise it's not as nice.

Speaker 7 (22:44):
Mm.

Speaker 1 (22:45):
Okay, well, we'll salute a bowl of that.

Speaker 4 (22:46):
Somebody said those mini cans hit harder than an actual
full-size can.

Speaker 1 (22:49):
Yeah, they're good because it's just a hit.

Speaker 7 (22:51):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (22:52):
You know those chody ones, those little bottles, those squat bottles?
I like those every now and then if I just
want a little... Anyway, so I got cans, okay? Now,
so I bought... And then we had dinner. It was
really nice. And then I was like, I feel like
a little sweetie treaty. And so I go in to
get my zilch.

Speaker 1 (23:07):
Jesus, listen to yourself.

Speaker 3 (23:09):
Go to get my zilch. And then I remember I've
got Coke Zero. So my new fridge sig... was a
Fridge Sig spider. How long has it been since you've
had a spider?

Speaker 1 (23:19):
Yeah, a long time. So I get my.

Speaker 3 (23:21):
Vanilla ice cream and I put it in and I
poured my Fridge Sig on top and I had a
spider and I was like, this is peak nostalgia.

Speaker 1 (23:29):
It was incredible. Remember how the Coke would go floppy
and creamy and thick? I've never liked them. Really? No,
I'm not a huge fan. Never, ever.

Speaker 4 (23:37):
When I was a kid, because people would always be,
that was the Cobb & Co drink. I'm like, no,
it's a traffic light. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (23:42):
When I go to Cobb & Co, I'm hitting a
traffic light.

Speaker 3 (23:44):
Or the Pink Panther, because you could do a Pink
Panther fridge cig with like a raspberry.

Speaker 4 (23:47):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (23:47):
Raspberry Coke. Oh my God, no, it was so good.

Speaker 4 (23:49):
It was so nostalgic. I've never liked a float or
a spider or whatever they're called.

Speaker 3 (23:53):
No, neither.

Speaker 1 (23:54):
Oh my God. And I gave Mike a sip and
he was like, man, how good's a spider? But with zilch.
and Coke Zero. Yeah, your brain is thinking it's getting
all that sugar and it's not. And it's not at all.
Oh my God, no.

Speaker 3 (24:07):
Someone just text him Vaughan's an animal, his bottle will
go flat because I don't drink it enough.

Speaker 4 (24:10):
Yeah, he's an animal. That's maybe why I don't like
the cans. It's too bubbly.

Speaker 7 (24:15):
Right.

Speaker 1 (24:15):
I'm not a super bubbly. Nah, I'm not a super
bubbly guy. It's too spicy.

Speaker 3 (24:19):
Someone said marinate your Coke in the fridge for a week.

Speaker 1 (24:22):
Can is best. Get out of here, Vaughan, with your
flat Coke. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (24:25):
You're going to marinate your Coke in the fridge for
a week? So you put your cans in the fridge
and you don't touch them for a week? Yeah, they've
got to go nice and whole. Sort of aging them
like a fine wine in a barrel.

Speaker 1 (24:33):
Yeah, yeah, you can get a Coke Zero Seller.

Speaker 4 (24:36):
Well, this is actually my 2024 Coke vintage here, aged
in an aluminium barrel.

Speaker 7 (24:41):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (24:42):
Someone said, what the F is a spider? It's called
a Coke float. In New Zealand, when you were like
a kid. Oh, both, yeah. Either way works. Someone said Hayley,
add a shot of vodka, it'll change your life.

Speaker 7 (24:50):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (24:50):
I don't know if you heard that she's shredding. Now
we're talking. She's shredding with the ice cream and the artificial.

Speaker 8 (24:56):
Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughan and Hayley.

Speaker 1 (25:00):
Time to play one of our favourite games, Mark the Date.
That's right, where we guess the music from, we've got
to work out the year. Yep. Based on three songs.
But what we do is we get in the car
with Mum. Played by Vaughan. Played by Vaughan. We are
Mum's Children, played by Fletch and Hayley.

Speaker 4 (25:18):
I've got my very extensive iPod. Yep, I'm plugged in
via USB. I don't have an iPhone. I'm not on
one of your streaming services. Call me old school, but
it's got.

Speaker 1 (25:28):
A click wheel. No, you've got an Oppo phone.

Speaker 4 (25:31):
Yeah, I've got an Oppo phone, so I don't know
how to put the apps on there.

Speaker 1 (25:35):
God forbid. And every now and then, but hopefully not today,
mum's new boyfriend, Mark.

Speaker 4 (25:41):
Well, Mark has to drive, Hayley, because Mark's my boyfriend.

Speaker 1 (25:44):
And I love Mark.

Speaker 4 (25:47):
And Mark's going to drive, and I'm going to play
the songs, and you guys have to guess what year
the song came out. Mark smells like Savloys.

Speaker 3 (25:54):
Mark stinks of Savloy fingers.

Speaker 1 (25:57):
That's not Savloy. That's his deodorant of choice.

Speaker 3 (26:00):
It smells like literal processed pork.

Speaker 4 (26:03):
It's Brute 33, and it does have an unusual reaction
to his sweat, but... He's trying his best. Mark eats
a lot of luncheon for a grown man. Mark loves
luncheon and cheese sandwiches with some tomato sauce on top.

Speaker 3 (26:14):
And when he gets to luncheon, he gets to the
luncheon with like the little bits of corn and pizza.

Speaker 4 (26:17):
Well, that's how he gets some of his five plus
a day. Mark does corn poos. Mark?

Speaker 1 (26:24):
We all do corn poos. Why is Mark even coming
with us today? Because he's going to drive while I
select the songs. We're going to Nana's graveyard. But Mark
didn't even know her. Yeah. It's a Shannon's Hack theme.

Speaker 4 (26:35):
Mark would have loved Nana and Nana would have loved Mark.
It is Shannon's Hack, but this is our first song.

Speaker 1 (26:41):
What year did Love Shack? 94. By the 52s come out.
It's early 90s. Three? It's in the first half of
the 90s.

Speaker 3 (26:49):
Do you remember that time that we came out and
we heard Mark called their bedroom the love shack.

Speaker 1 (26:57):
Mark's a very... Not you wish, Savoy penis. Mark's a
rambunctious lover.

Speaker 4 (27:02):
He's made me want to explore new avenues.

Speaker 1 (27:07):
I'm upset. We're going to see Nana's funeral home. You know,
I never liked missionary until Mark came into my life.

Speaker 2 (27:13):
Oh, yuck.

Speaker 1 (27:13):
What were you doing before? Don't answer. Oh, my God.
Trying not to look at your father. The bangles. Eternal Flame. Wait,
this is the original, right? This is the original. Not
Atomic Kitten. This is the Atomic Kitten version. It's way earlier.
It's got to be like 92, 93. I don't know.

Speaker 4 (27:35):
Third song from this year. This is a confusing year. Michael.

Speaker 1 (27:42):
Michael Jackson. Crazy we're playing that. Smooth Criminal. What is this?
We've forgotten about all that stuff. We've forgotten about all
that stuff. Well, apparently people have. Dude. Is it?

Speaker 4 (27:52):
I'm not looking forward to my Spotify rap, the amount
of times Michael Jackson's been put on by the kids.

Speaker 1 (27:56):
Oh, it's not my favourite.

Speaker 4 (27:58):
Yeesh.

Speaker 1 (27:58):
I'm like 91, 90? It's, yeah, I still want to
say 93 for some reason. I'm confused by this.

Speaker 3 (28:04):
I was a baby at this point.

Speaker 4 (28:06):
Do it.

Speaker 3 (28:08):
Oh, Mark's doing little Michael Jackson crotch pops.

Speaker 1 (28:12):
Oh, yuck, Mark.

Speaker 6 (28:15):
Shut up.

Speaker 1 (28:15):
That was Mark that did the Michael Jackson. Let's do
it again, Mark. Oh, yuck.

Speaker 3 (28:20):
Feel free to text in and play along, by the way, 9696,
if you want to play along with.

Speaker 1 (28:24):
Mark the Dash. Okay, I'm going to go 93. I'll
go with you because I'm clueless. Not only will you.
A baby, Hayley. It was the year you were born.
I was going to say 89. Wow. Okay. I was
going to say 89. It's a new year.

Speaker 7 (28:40):
Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 (28:40):
This is a story about a girl named Lucky. I
was 11, 2001.

Speaker 4 (28:43):
2001.

Speaker 5 (28:43):
Or 2000.

Speaker 1 (28:43):
Early morning. Shut up, Mark. She wakes up. Knock, knock, knock.
It's 2001. 2001.

Speaker 5 (29:01):
Shit.

Speaker 1 (29:01):
2000.

Speaker 5 (29:01):
2000.

Speaker 1 (29:01):
Miss Jackson. Stan Coney has a great album. Dude, this
whole album slaps. Yeah, it's amazing. Okay, yeah, I'd say 2000, 2001.

Speaker 5 (29:09):
2000, 2001.

Speaker 1 (29:09):
I remember Lucky coming out. Okay, next. The third song. 2000, yeah.

Speaker 4 (29:12):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (29:23):
It just keeps getting better. What is this?

Speaker 4 (29:27):
It's Amazed by Lone Star.

Speaker 1 (29:31):
Yeah, 2001.

Speaker 4 (29:33):
That's a huge, massive wedding song, this one.

Speaker 1 (29:36):
Great for a first dance. It just keeps getting better.

Speaker 2 (29:41):
Dance.

Speaker 1 (29:41):
It's either 2001 or 2002. Don't even think about marrying
Mark again, Mum. What year was... Mark and I. Oops,
I did it again. You. I'm going to go 2001.
What are people saying on the text machine? 2002's got
a vote.

Speaker 3 (29:57):
Because I remember playing it to the Hanson twins and
they were the year below me, but I was an intermediate.

Speaker 1 (30:01):
The Hanson twins. Oh, no. Sorry, I thought you meant Hanson.

Speaker 3 (30:04):
The girls that I went to school with. By the way,
did you see Taylor Hanson's doing Dancing with the Stars?

Speaker 1 (30:07):
Can't wait. 2002 or 2001? I want to say two. Two.
You guys aren't on today.

Speaker 5 (30:16):
One.

Speaker 1 (30:16):
Shit, 2000. It's the year 2000. And I said that
and I moved. Damn it. You listen to my gut.
It's because Mark's Savoy pits are distracting me. 97. Yeah, 96.
Think about Lion King.

Speaker 4 (30:32):
96 was one of my best friends.

Speaker 1 (30:36):
Oh, no, 95. 95. Yeah, 95. Give it a moment.
This was the year that Mark probably got his first pube.
Mark was in his 20s by the time this came out. Yuck,
he's so old. I can smell him. Why were you
with such an old man, Mum? Does he scrub? Who
don't look at each other while this song's playing? This
is yuck. I want my dad. Mark, later on would

(30:59):
you like to be Simba to my Nala? Oh, yuck.
I'm calling Dad. Dad, I miss you. Mark's yuck. What
are you and Stacey doing?

Speaker 4 (31:07):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (31:11):
Six.

Speaker 4 (31:11):
Five. Zombie by the Cranberries.

Speaker 1 (31:14):
It's 95. Got to be 95. It's got to be 95.

Speaker 3 (31:16):
We're going to text in for 95.

Speaker 1 (31:21):
Okay. Next song. Okay. Last song for this year. Yeah, 95.
This was the year of 95. In my mind, Lisa
Loeb's day. Zombie was 94, someone said. I'm going to say,
it could even be 96. I only hear when I

(31:44):
want to. What was the TV show that made this
a running gag? Was it a Dawson's? It wasn't Dawson's.
It's giving big Dawson's. Or was it five? 95 would
have been around this time.

Speaker 3 (31:53):
That's just a little bit of a.

Speaker 1 (31:56):
I think 95.

Speaker 4 (31:56):
95.

Speaker 1 (31:57):
Let's go 95. So close.

Speaker 4 (31:58):
1994.

Speaker 5 (31:58):
Oh!

Speaker 1 (31:59):
We sucked today. Sorry, Ricky.

Speaker 3 (32:02):
Ricky messaged in saying zombie was 94.

Speaker 1 (32:04):
Damn it. This one, Fletch, I'll be very disappointed if
you don't get.
The last song in this one, if you don't get it. Yeah,
Lion King was released in 94. Yeah, Lion King was
released in 94. Okay, well, we're 2000s for sure.

Speaker 5 (32:20):
For sure.

Speaker 1 (32:20):
Go ahead.

Speaker 4 (32:21):
Rihanna's done some music from Good Girl Gone Bad.

Speaker 1 (32:24):
I remember that we had the opportunity to, we interviewed Rihanna,
didn't we? When she first came out and we were like,
who is this? Fonda replay. She's everything now. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (32:33):
Cousin Shannon sang 2008. We just drove past her.

Speaker 1 (32:37):
She just yelled it out. She yelled it. Okay. Okay. Oh,
hold on. This is the explicit version.

Speaker 4 (32:43):
I can't remember there being swear words in this song.

Speaker 1 (32:49):
American Boy, Estelle. Yeah, great. Yeah, it's giving 2008. Yeah.
That area. Okay, next one. Did you not play the
swear word version because Mark doesn't like to swear? Mark
doesn't like swear words. Tell him he's a shithead. I
won't tell him that. Oh!

Speaker 4 (33:08):
It's insane to me that this was so long ago.

Speaker 1 (33:11):
This is when we went to Vegas.

Speaker 4 (33:12):
Bingo.

Speaker 1 (33:13):
What year was that? I don't remember. 2010? See, you
travel too much. If you can't remember what year we
went to Vegas, you travel too much. Someone said 07.
I was year 8 when this came out. I want
to say 08. Someone said 2010. Yeah, it could be
2010 or 08. Someone said 2007. Just got back from
the UK. Let's go 2008 then. Lock it in. I'm clueless. 2007?

Speaker 4 (33:31):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (33:31):
What one?

Speaker 4 (33:32):
2007. 2007. You had victory in your hands.

Speaker 3 (33:41):
No!

Speaker 1 (33:42):
Was it eight? It was 2008. Oh. Yeah, okay.

Speaker 6 (33:45):
2008.

Speaker 4 (33:45):
We went to Las Vegas, and this was the song
that Apple were using to promote.

Speaker 1 (33:50):
What were they promoting at the time, though? Yes. A
brand-new product called the iPod Shuffle. The iPod Shuffle. It
was a shuffle, and it was, like, bouncing around. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4 (33:59):
And there was this billboard where we were waiting for, like,
public transport or just outside the hotel, and every time
it came in, It came on, it.

Speaker 1 (34:06):
Would scare us because it was just a song so
super loud. Can you smell Mark? You know why Mark's
luncheon put us off? I can smell his luncheon fingers.
He doesn't wash his fingers after he has his sandwiches.
Mark does wash his hands. It's yuck. Mark does wash
his hands.

Speaker 2 (34:18):

Speaker 8 (34:21):

Speaker 1 (34:24):
Give us a wannabe.

Speaker 3 (34:24):
Give us wannabe because it's relevant to what I'm going
to share. If you missed it, the Spice Girls over.

Speaker 1 (34:31):
What were you listening to?

Speaker 4 (34:32):
We're still playing music from when we did Mark the Day.

Speaker 1 (34:35):
Okay. Wannabe was your chosen Spice Girls? Because, yes. I
press play. It just sometimes takes a little while to think.
Are you getting an ad? Are you not on the
family plan? Here we go. So, last night on the
Spice Girls Instagram. This is also why Vaughn was fired from...
The bar is a DJ.

Speaker 5 (34:56):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (34:56):
And so bad. Big spots. Too much dead air. Yeah,
everyone's like, play Sandstorm. And you're like, yeah, okay, hang on.
Hold on. And then the dance floor would clear.

Speaker 3 (35:07):
So, last night, over on Instagram, the Spice Girls dropped
a cryptic Instagram video, and it was shot on the
staircase where this video was filmed.

Speaker 1 (35:17):
Oh, okay.

Speaker 7 (35:18):
The St.

Speaker 3 (35:18):
Pancras Hotel staircase, made famous from this video.

Speaker 1 (35:21):
Running up, turn to the camera.

Speaker 5 (35:22):
Yep.

Speaker 3 (35:23):
The birth of the Spice Girls in 1994.

Speaker 1 (35:26):
So everyone was like, what the hell is this?

Speaker 3 (35:31):
And it said 10th of the 9th, 26, which at 2pm,
which is basically this morning in New Zealand time. And
it said, you'll need a vinyl or CD player. And
everyone was like, what is this?

Speaker 1 (35:43):
Overnight, people were like, we haven't heard from them in
a while. Reunion. Here we go.

Speaker 3 (35:47):
Let's get ready. Fans assumed a tour of Vegas residency.
How good would they be at the Sphere?

Speaker 1 (35:53):
It's never happening. It's never happening.

Speaker 3 (35:56):
Maybe even the full five-piece return with Victoria.

Speaker 1 (35:59):
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. What got confirmed yesterday?

Speaker 3 (36:03):
A vinyl or CD box set collection for their 30th anniversary.

Speaker 1 (36:07):
Because that's When is that?

Speaker 7 (36:11):
27?

Speaker 4 (36:11):
Well, I just read Wannabe came out in 1996. It
came out in Japan first. Before it was released in
the UK. Japan and then the UK and then in 1997.
So what, like sometime soon around this time? It was
actually July 8th, 1996.

Speaker 1 (36:25):
Oh, okay.

Speaker 3 (36:27):
So for the 30th anniversary, they're re-releasing... a box set
of all the vinyls and CDs that you can get.

Speaker 1 (36:34):
And everyone was like, oh, boo.

Speaker 3 (36:37):
But they are going to have on it like demos,
you know, never heard before demos of songs that didn't
make the cart.

Speaker 1 (36:45):
Studio samples and that kind of stuff. So some new-ish music.
People said it's underwhelming.

Speaker 3 (36:50):
Sands were like, don't do us dirty like that.

Speaker 1 (36:52):
We've assumed tour of Vegas residency. They're never doing that, though.
No tour. Victoria will never do that. She's so rich.
She doesn't need to. She's so successful in fashion. She's like,
I don't want to do it. I don't want to sing. Yeah,
she doesn't need the modern social media world telling her
she can't sing again. Yeah, she's like, I know. There's
so much meaner now. Yeah, there's so much meaner. Yeah,
she doesn't need that. She's filthy rich. They're never performing.

Speaker 6 (37:13):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (37:14):
Anyway, that's what you can get if you're a big
Spice Girls fan.

Speaker 2 (37:17):

Speaker 6 (37:19):
What's going on?

Speaker 8 (37:20):
ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.

Speaker 3 (37:23):
We want to know right now, were you named after
a TV show character?

Speaker 1 (37:27):
Or will we take movie show characters? Yeah, TV, movie,
just a character. I love that you called them movie shows.
Movie shows.

Speaker 4 (37:33):
You named after one of their movie show characters?

Speaker 1 (37:36):
Movie show. A TV show or a movie. So Carly
Rae Jepsen has had a son. And she didn't call
him maybe. She didn't. That would have been. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I would have called him maybe. Oh, my God. Imagine
if she'd called him maybe. The internet would just lose it.
Call me maybe. No, she called him Ilya, which is,
of course, a character from Hated Rivalry. I didn't know that.

(37:56):
I still haven't watched that. Ilya. Ilya. I-L-Y-A. I would
have thought your girlfriend would have loved it. Doesn't she
read all the... We started. The smutty ones. Yeah. I
think she's more of a P and V more than
a P and a P.

Speaker 7 (38:12):
Or a P and B.

Speaker 1 (38:12):
Because this is P and P, A and P and
the B. Yeah, I don't think she likes P and
P and the B at all in Headed Rivalry. Sometimes
I'm like, you got a bit of P and P.
You got a bit of P and P. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So I've got a bit of B and V, but
I don't know. And boo, and B. No, yeah, no,
I'll P and B and P and P. That's a
great show. They're currently filming the second season of Headed Rivalry.

Speaker 3 (38:32):
But Ilya is the Russian character from this show.

Speaker 1 (38:36):
So this is what we want to know. Were you
named after a.

Speaker 3 (38:39):
A TV show, or a TV character, sorry, or a
movie character. And Mel from The Office is joining us
this morning. And this is a theme in your family.

Speaker 9 (38:47):
Yeah, so I'm one of six children, and when my
mum was first pregnant with my older brother, the deal
she made with my dad was that my dad got
to name the boys and my mum got to name
the girls.

Speaker 4 (38:58):
Right.

Speaker 9 (38:59):
And they had four boys, and they all got named
after famous rock musicians.

Speaker 1 (39:04):
Oh, can you give us their names?

Speaker 4 (39:06):
Angus.

Speaker 6 (39:08):
From ACDC.

Speaker 2 (39:09):
Then George.

Speaker 1 (39:11):
Thorogood.

Speaker 5 (39:11):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (39:12):
Floyd. Pink Floyd. Jethro. Ta.

Speaker 4 (39:16):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (39:17):
Your parents have great taste. I bet your old man
rolls a mean cigarette. What are you named after? What's
your sister? Oh, Mel B from the Spice Girls. Are
you a one of six?

Speaker 2 (39:31):
I'm one of six, yes.

Speaker 5 (39:33):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (39:33):
And so mum named you Mel after what? From a
baby book. Yeah. That's uninspired, Matt, mum. She said she got.

Speaker 9 (39:41):
Overwhelmed and she just flicked through the baby book and
she just picked one. And then my sister got Penelope.

Speaker 1 (39:48):
Cruise.

Speaker 2 (39:49):
No, Penelope Pitstop.

Speaker 1 (39:52):
From Wacky Races?

Speaker 7 (39:54):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (39:54):
Amazing. Dick Dastardly and Mutton. Yeah. Oh my God, that's brilliant. Okay, well,
this is exactly what we want to know this morning.
0800 dials at M. You can text through 9696. There's
so many already.

Speaker 3 (40:06):
Were you named after a famous character, movie or TV show?

Speaker 1 (40:10):
Kayla. Good morning.

Speaker 6 (40:12):
Hi, good morning.

Speaker 1 (40:14):
I'm really struggling to think of a movie character or
TV show character called Kayla. Kayla, yeah. Who were you
named after?

Speaker 5 (40:20):
Well, actually, I also stole the name apparently from my
auntie who she keeps reminding me, but it's Days of
Our Lives.

Speaker 3 (40:29):
Taylor Brady, apparently.

Speaker 1 (40:30):
Days of Our Lives. One of those like soap operas
that was on daytime television. Like suns through the hourglass.
These are the Days of Our Lives.

Speaker 5 (40:39):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (40:40):
And were your parents big fans?

Speaker 6 (40:42):
My mum was, apparently. I don't know.

Speaker 8 (40:46):
I did watch it on the odd.

Speaker 6 (40:48):
I was sick from school, but there was Kayla Brady there.
I think she died by that stage.

Speaker 1 (40:53):
Oh, they wrote her out, yeah. Kayla, thank you. Let's
go to Sam. Sam. Hello. You were named after a
TV show character.

Speaker 4 (41:01):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (41:03):
Fireman Sam.

Speaker 4 (41:05):
I am Samantha from Bewitched.

Speaker 1 (41:08):
Oh, with the twitchy nose.

Speaker 5 (41:11):
But my sister is Tabitha.

Speaker 7 (41:13):
Oh. So.

Speaker 2 (41:14):
Samantha and Tabitha.

Speaker 1 (41:15):
Samantha was the mother to Tabitha. Oh, wow. And we
cannot switch our noses. Mum was a big fan then. Oh,
you can't do the nose. Mum was a big fan
of Bewitched.

Speaker 4 (41:24):
Yep.

Speaker 5 (41:25):
And we get asked all the time as kids, oh, girls,
can you wiggle your noses?

Speaker 1 (41:29):
It's like, no, we cannot.

Speaker 5 (41:30):
Oh, mum.

Speaker 1 (41:31):
Yeah, mum did that. That's mum's fault, isn't it? Sam,
thank you. Kylie, you named your son after a TV
show or a movie character. What was the name?

Speaker 6 (41:43):
Well, he was at the time the hottest guy on TV.
And so it's a bit weird that we named my
son after him. But we have had so many conversations
at the supermarket when I call his name or anything
and somebody says, oh, my gosh, did you name your
son off home and away? What's his name? And it
always starts a conversation. His name is Brax.

Speaker 2 (42:05):
Brax.

Speaker 1 (42:06):
Brax was one of the River Boys, wasn't he? Yeah,
he was. It's also, I don't know if teachers listening
could confirm this, but it's also probably a shit bag name. Yeah,
is he a brat? Is Brax a brat? A little
bit naughty. Oh, yeah. She's like, yep, you did that.

Speaker 4 (42:22):
Yep.

Speaker 1 (42:23):
Love that. Kylie, thank you. Some messages. I named my
son Jack from the video game Jack and Daxter.

Speaker 7 (42:30):
Oh, yeah.

Speaker 4 (42:30):
It's a video game. I am Jade Bianca. Mum was
a big Mick Jagger. Mick Jagger fan.

Speaker 1 (42:38):
Yeah, okay. His wives? Girlfriends? Yeah, I think so. Yeah. Elsa,
someone said. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. From the movie Frozen.
Home and Away. Hang on. We named our son after
Ice Cube.

Speaker 3 (42:50):
After days of going through lists, my partner suggested O'Shea
and it fitted.

Speaker 1 (42:54):
Is that his name? Is that his actual name? O'Shea.
Isn't that his last name? Well, keep your texts coming
in 969. Ice Cube O'Shea.

Speaker 4 (43:00):
9696.

Speaker 1 (43:00):
O'Shea Jackson. No, yeah, O'Shea Jackson. Are you named after
a TV show character or movie character?

Speaker 4 (43:07):
So we want to know, you know, if you named
your kid after her. character from a TV or movie.

Speaker 1 (43:12):
And lots and lots and lots.

Speaker 4 (43:14):
Of you have.

Speaker 3 (43:15):
I named my daughter after a mum from 16 and pregnant.

Speaker 1 (43:17):
Remember the MTV show? Yes. Which one? Which one? They
all went into porn afterwards. Did they? Yeah. Every single
one of them. Check it out. I'm named Elvis.

Speaker 5 (43:31):
Yep.

Speaker 4 (43:32):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (43:33):
Remember I knew an Elvis and Presley? Yeah.

Speaker 3 (43:35):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (43:36):
Yep.

Speaker 1 (43:37):
You wouldn't go Elvis. I'm sorry. No one's beating that.
It's like calling someone Madonna.

Speaker 6 (43:42):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (43:43):
Or Shakira. Those names already belong primarily to one person.
Even Elvis Costello. I'm always like, come on, mate. We've
had Presley. I wouldn't have gone. We did Presley. I
would have changed it up.

Speaker 4 (43:53):
My stepdaughter is named after Mia from Fast and the Furious.
My daughter is named after Selena Gomez's character from The
Only Murders in the Building.

Speaker 1 (44:00):
Her name is Mabel. Oh, I love that. That's a
very nice name.

Speaker 4 (44:05):
We named my son Jensen after the character from Supernatural.
I thought they said Jetson for a while.

Speaker 1 (44:11):
I met George Jetson.

Speaker 4 (44:13):
And my daughter is named Collins after a character from
The Blind Side. When I was a teacher, I taught
an Atreyu.

Speaker 1 (44:21):
Atreyu? From Never Ending Story.

Speaker 8 (44:23):
Wow. Atreyu.

Speaker 4 (44:25):
Wow. And, yeah, they were totally named after... Oh, yeah,
he's a Star Wars one. We named our son Kanan
after Kanan Jarrus from Star Wars Rebels.

Speaker 1 (44:32):
It's a good one.

Speaker 3 (44:33):
Not a human, but we named our dog Zed after
Pulp Fiction just so my dad could say.

Speaker 1 (44:37):
Zed's dead, baby, when he dies. When he dies. It's
a long game, eh?

Speaker 4 (44:40):
And I reckon it's one of those gags you'd be like,
you'd actually forget about.

Speaker 1 (44:43):
It in the moment because of how sad you are.

Speaker 2 (44:45):
Could you be so heartbroken? The ZM Podcast Network.

Speaker 8 (44:49):

Speaker 1 (44:52):
Now, today on TVNZ Plus, season two of The Paper,
which is a spin-off, if you haven't seen it, of
The US Office, which you love, Hayley.

Speaker 3 (45:00):
I love The US Office, The Paper, and it's like,
it's a dry, irreverent comedy. It's absolutely amazing. Now, we
are having some tech issues.

Speaker 4 (45:08):
Yeah, we've got Dommel Gleeson from The Paper on Zoom.
We've got tech issues.

Speaker 1 (45:12):
We can see him, he can't see us, Dommel. That's
what I've heard. It feels not fair. It really is
not fair.

Speaker 3 (45:19):
And if we can just start by describing ourselves to you,
we are known as New Zealand's sexiest, hottest radio station. It's, like,
overwhelming how good-looking we are, and it's a shame you're
not going to get to say it.

Speaker 7 (45:29):
That's absolutely mad. I had the opposite in my head
for some reason, but I'll take you at your word.

Speaker 5 (45:33):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (45:34):
It's crazy. We didn't, like, they.

Speaker 4 (45:36):
We've been called intimidating before when we've had big concerns.
That's why you leave the camera off.

Speaker 7 (45:39):
That's why you leave the camera off. You didn't want
to intimidate me and I appreciate that.

Speaker 1 (45:43):
Your agent actually got in touch with us and said,
we can't have that. We saw your interview.

Speaker 4 (45:48):
We saw your press for the Odyssey movie and you
really made them all Zendaya. You've really affected their confidence.
So camera off, I'm afraid.

Speaker 1 (45:56):
But we're just going to leave you with that picture.
You are a very good looking man. Why are you
flirting with him?

Speaker 7 (46:02):
Well, no. Well, we've been doing jokes now about who's
good looking and who's not. So I don't feel like
I can take you.

Speaker 1 (46:07):
Out of your world. But we should move through this
section of the interview quickly. Let's move through it quickly.

Speaker 3 (46:13):
Now, season two is out today in New Zealand. We're
very excited. But season one, you left us on an
absolute cliffhanger. Ned and Mia, can you give us a
little tease? Because I know for me, that's the storyline
I'm excited to pick up on.

Speaker 1 (46:25):
Oh, that's nice.

Speaker 7 (46:26):
Yeah, you know, I think we pick up season two
really shortly after the end of season one. So Ned
has basically sort of got everything he ever wanted, like
more than he ever wanted. He didn't even realize he
liked Mare. And then all of a sudden he just,
this amazing person wants to kiss him. And so he's
just like, his whole life feels like it's made and

(46:48):
the paper is doing great. And then of course, there's
another side to that, which is you've got to go
back to work and deal with the consequences. And that's
where we find them in season one, which is great.
I really like that.

Speaker 3 (46:59):
I think workplace romances never really work out. Fletch and Vaughn,
you guys had a try.

Speaker 1 (47:03):
Didn't work. Nah, it didn't work. It didn't really work.

Speaker 7 (47:06):
But you're all so beautiful. Were you too beautiful?

Speaker 1 (47:09):
Was that the problem? I mean, that was the problem.
That was the problem. As I got closer to kissing,
it was too hard. Yeah. It can happen.

Speaker 3 (47:17):
As part of our radio station, we actually work for
a bigger media company. We own a... newspaper, the NZ Herald.
Fletch reads the newspaper every day. Do you have a
favourite section of the paper?

Speaker 7 (47:28):
This is not flattering to newspapers, but I love newspapers.
But I actually read most of... I'm subscribed to a
few different newspapers. I read most of them online. I
buy the physical newspaper, the Irish Times at Home.

Speaker 1 (47:41):
But I.

Speaker 7 (47:43):
A lot of the time what I'm doing is it's
the crossword. I like doing the crossword in pen or
pencil if I'm not feeling confident. So that's the reason
for that.

Speaker 1 (47:56):
But no, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 7 (47:57):
If I've got the physical paper, I'll often find myself
inevitably drawn to the crossword.

Speaker 3 (48:01):
You give big energy if you can do a cryptic.
Can you do cryptic or just the basic one?

Speaker 7 (48:07):
I try the cryptic. I mean, I'm not bad at
the Irish one. You know, I'm pretty good. I'm pretty good,
I think.

Speaker 1 (48:11):
Yeah. You say the Irish one. Is there a specific
sort of Irish crossword that we're all, you know... It's
all limericks. Are you gatekeeping limericks? Limerick crosswords.

Speaker 7 (48:19):
Okay, guys, you are teetering on the brink of your
ignorance here.

Speaker 1 (48:22):
I'm just going to.

Speaker 7 (48:24):
No, it's not all limericks. No, no. It's a good
cryptic crossword in the Irish times.

Speaker 1 (48:30):
I like it.

Speaker 3 (48:30):
Now, can we ask a question because at ZM we
play a lot of Taylor Swift and obviously you teased
that you wanted to be in a music video with
Taylor and then she was like, okay, let's do it
and then you were. Were you able to flip that
and get her into your next project? Can you confirm
or deny if Taylor Swift is in season two of
the paper?

Speaker 7 (48:46):
I can neither confirm nor.

Speaker 1 (48:47):
Do you know what, actually?

Speaker 7 (48:49):
I'm not even going to do that joke because the
amount of Taylor Swift fans, if they watched it and
find out.

Speaker 1 (48:53):
She's not in it... Hell of a way to get
those numbers up, man.

Speaker 7 (48:57):
It would not be worth the 600 million extra views
we get because the backlash would be too much. So no, unfortunately, yeah,
Taylor does not appear, but she was incredibly nice about
the paper. when we were on that show, on the
Graham Norton show, and remained very nice about it throughout.
So I really appreciated that.

Speaker 1 (49:13):
Like, what a pro.

Speaker 7 (49:14):
She watched the paper before we were on the couch.
It hadn't been released at that point. She watched it
and she watched Killing Murphy's film, Steve, which is amazing.

Speaker 1 (49:21):
Wow.

Speaker 7 (49:22):
She'd done all her homework before she sat down on
the couch, which just shows what a nice person.

Speaker 1 (49:26):
How many hours does she get in her day? It's crazy.

Speaker 7 (49:30):
I don't know. She has special days.

Speaker 1 (49:31):
I've only got 24 hours. We love it when billionaires
are actually nice.

Speaker 3 (49:34):
We're actually already being told to wrap up because we
spent too much time describing how hot we were and
how to do a good cryptic crossword.

Speaker 1 (49:40):
It happens. It happens. It happens.

Speaker 3 (49:42):
But Donald, thank you so much. We're very excited for
season two. It's such a great show.

Speaker 1 (49:46):
Very charming. Very lovely. And thank you for your time
this morning. Noah Khan.

Speaker 3 (49:58):
If you don't know what a rider is, a rider
is like something that'll be sent to a venue ahead
of you performing there.

Speaker 1 (50:05):
And it's like, this is what I want in my
green room. Yeah, in the dressing room. And there's been.

Speaker 3 (50:09):
Famous ones like Mariah Carey doesn't want any brown M &
Ms or this person, you know, like rock stars with
like five bottles of vodka and a hookah.

Speaker 4 (50:18):
There was a, when they always wanted a TV and
it had to be to throw out the window. To
throw out the window.

Speaker 1 (50:22):
It was probably Motley Crue or something like that, you know?

Speaker 7 (50:25):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (50:25):
Well, lovely Noah Khan. of stick season fame. We love
Noah Khan. Also in the country zone.

Speaker 4 (50:33):
Also this song's about to tick over two billion streams
on Spotify. He needs to change that line there's COVID
on the plane. I don't know what he changes it to.

Speaker 1 (50:41):
Because the whole thing was a ruse.

Speaker 4 (50:42):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (50:45):
I couldn't even hold on to it. You couldn't even
keep a straight face. But no, it's just, it's aged terribly.
It's aged terribly. But it's a great song.

Speaker 3 (50:52):
But he's discussed his rider, and this has brought something
to my attention that we need to discuss as a trio.

Speaker 1 (50:58):
It was actually Van Halen that asked for all bottles
of M & M' s with the brown candies removed. There
you go, yeah. Beyonce, her list includes specific items like
hand-carved ice balls. And Kanye West requested cylindrical vases only
if there were vases. Yes.

Speaker 3 (51:13):
And some people get, some people, because you go backstage
at venues, they're just whatever colour they are.

Speaker 1 (51:17):
Some people request them to be painted certain colours. The
whole room? The green room needs to be a nice
soft lavender or something.

Speaker 3 (51:24):
And they're like, yeah, sure. So, Noah Khan, right? Newly famous,
but big deal. It was talking in an interview and
says what his is.

Speaker 1 (51:33):
All dressed chips. So like really flavoured chips. All dressed chips.
It's an American thing. That sounds good. All-dressed chips. All-dressed.
All pause for the all-dressed chip search. Stand by. They're
a Canadian potato chip flavor that blends barbecue, sour cream, onion, ketchup,
and salt and vinegar into one sweet, savory, and tangy seasoning. Okay,

(51:56):
and they're ruffles. They're called ruffles. Yeah, okay, ruffles. So
he's getting those. He's getting cinnamon toast crunch. Now, that's
a cereal. That's a cereal. He's getting non-alcoholic beer. Okay.

Speaker 3 (52:07):
So a little bit further away from Van Halen, you know,
in the Volcker and the M & M' s.

Speaker 1 (52:12):
And a probiotic soda.

Speaker 7 (52:14):
Oh, okay.

Speaker 1 (52:14):
A probiotic soda. Wait, but he's the one that was
talking about not shitting yourself in the crowd.

Speaker 7 (52:20):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (52:21):
On stage.

Speaker 3 (52:21):
It is one of the driest and most boring riders.
And I was like, dude, if I had the power
of a celebrity, I'd just be like, whatever I want.
This year, I mean, this is probably the biggest tour
I've done this year. And mine was a charcuterie and
a bottle of bubbles. And every venue you go to
will just be there. And you're like, I mean, I'm
paying for it, but.

Speaker 1 (52:39):
It comes out of what, like you pay the venue, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But I'm like, this is nice.

Speaker 3 (52:43):
But then I was thinking about this. Fletchbourne and Hayley Live.
By the way, overnight we released 50 tickets to every venue,
including the sold out Hamilton.

Speaker 1 (52:51):
Really good seats as well in the middle. No, well,
10 left. 10 in Hamilton. So Hamilton completely sold out.
If you want those tickets, livenation.co.nz. Do that now because
it will definitely sell out.

Speaker 3 (53:01):
My homies, who's the stars of that show? Fletchford and Hayley.
Fletchford and Hayley Live.

Speaker 1 (53:06):
We get a writer. What are we putting on it?
We did this last time. I think they just said,
do you guys want some booze? And we were like, yeah. Yeah,
and they said what?

Speaker 3 (53:12):
And we said tequila and whiskey.

Speaker 1 (53:14):
And I think we ordered some burgers or something, and
that was it, right? Yeah, well, let's come on. So
you're telling me that we can get, like, a big
list of things? We have bigger venues this year.

Speaker 4 (53:21):
That old rocker Iggy Pop once asked for a Bob
Hope impersonator to tell jokes about golf while seven people
dressed up as the dwarves walked around in a mask
in where Snow White was.

Speaker 1 (53:30):
Now, that sounds pretty good to me. Puff off. That
sounds pretty good to me. Like, let's dream big.

Speaker 3 (53:35):
What do we want in this thing? I'm thinking I'm
going to want a coconut tequila. To keep it, you know.

Speaker 4 (53:42):
I want Dallin Watenia-Zelezniak to score a try right in
the corner of the green room.

Speaker 1 (53:46):
Dive and try. You want a Warriors player there. Correct.
That's going to cost a lot of money. Well, no,
he doesn't have to be there for long. He just
has to score a try in the corner. Out of nowhere.
We're doing this tour on a shoestring budget, my friend.

Speaker 3 (53:57):
Well, I want a Jason Momoa impersonator who gives us
foot massages after we come off.

Speaker 1 (54:00):
We're exhausted. That can work. That can work. Yeah, he
can be dressed up as Aquaman. That'll be good. Yep.

Speaker 3 (54:06):
I would like some, yeah, I'd like some hot biatches.
If we're going to be in a rock and roll
mode there. Or if you're putting in an order.

Speaker 1 (54:12):
Yeah, or I could just show order for the table. Yeah,
what flavours are you going to get? Just some Brazilians
would be nice. Brazilians, okay, yeah. I think we just
need to build our dream rider. Right, okay.

Speaker 3 (54:23):
And get some good stuff in there because it's called Fletch,
Vaughan and Hayley Live.

Speaker 1 (54:27):
Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley get what they want. Yeah, get
your tickets, livenation.co.nz. Today, by the way, is four weeks
until we kick off the tour in Wellington at the
Opera House.

Speaker 3 (54:36):
Yeah, Opera House in Wellington. I'm very excited for that.
My official birthday show.

Speaker 1 (54:41):
We'll be good. Well, it's the day after. It's closer
to my birthday. No, that's not technically. Technically, you're wrong.
It should be the Vaughan birthday show.

Speaker 3 (54:47):
And then Hamilton, which I reckon by the time I
finish saying the sentence will be completely sold out again.

Speaker 5 (54:52):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (54:53):
And then, of course, the last show will be Crush
It at the Town Hall. the following weekend. So livenation.co.nz
for those tickets.

Speaker 2 (55:00):

Speaker 8 (55:01):
Play ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Hayley.

Speaker 1 (55:04):
It's time for... Fact of the Day, Day, Day, Day, Day. Hey, Vaughan. Yes, Vaughan.

Speaker 7 (55:22):
Yes, Vaughan.

Speaker 4 (55:23):
Who's Fact of the Day brought to you by? Well,
thanks for asking, Vaughan. Fact of the Day is brought
to you by St.

Speaker 1 (55:28):
Pierre's.

Speaker 4 (55:29):
Today's sushi of the day is eight pieces of smoked salmon.
Avocado for $ 8.

Speaker 6 (55:35):
40.

Speaker 1 (55:36):
Could be smoother. It's quite clunky. Clunk, clunk, clunk. Like
a train that's come off the rails. It's still moving.
We don't talk about derailments. Like Nana falling down the stairs.
We don't talk about old Nana falling down the stairs.
We don't talk about trying to derail. It's serious. Today
we're talking about prolactin.

Speaker 4 (55:55):
Because it's hormone week and prolactin is a human and
wider animal hormone.

Speaker 1 (56:00):
Make our boobies make milk.

Speaker 2 (56:03):
They do.

Speaker 5 (56:03):
It does.

Speaker 1 (56:04):
How did you know that? Lactate. Lactate. Pro meaning.

Speaker 7 (56:08):
Lactate.

Speaker 4 (56:08):
Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (56:09):
Well, and also. Do you think my boobies could make
milk if I don't have a baby? If I've tried,
if I thought hard enough.

Speaker 6 (56:15):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (56:15):
We're going to get to that because yes.

Speaker 4 (56:17):
There is an abnormally high prolactin medical issue called hyperprolactamemia.

Speaker 1 (56:25):
He must have been close. Close enough.

Speaker 4 (56:28):
Often from a benign pituitary, you know that gland that
controls hormones?

Speaker 1 (56:32):
Pituitary.

Speaker 4 (56:32):
Pituitary gland, which can cause people to start producing milk
even when they're not pregnant and they're not breastfeeding or anything.

Speaker 1 (56:39):
I can make milk.

Speaker 4 (56:40):
If you start, ladies and gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen, you
can sit this one out. Ladies, if you do start
lactating and you're not pregnant- You should probably see someone
because it could be a benign tumour of the pituitary gland.

Speaker 1 (56:54):
Okay, I don't want to do that. Shannon's saying that
lesbian couples often share breastfeeding. That's a thing. Oh, so
the mum that didn't carry the child.

Speaker 4 (57:04):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (57:05):
Oh, wait, so there's a baby.

Speaker 9 (57:06):
You can induce lactation by being around the baby and
sharing the hormones and being around.

Speaker 1 (57:11):
And being in love with it, and yeah.

Speaker 2 (57:13):
If you put the.

Speaker 5 (57:13):
Baby on it enough, your body will recognise the need
to start doing it.

Speaker 1 (57:17):
And you can produce it.

Speaker 4 (57:18):
This is the same woman that told us to take
a door off its hinges and put it on two stools.

Speaker 1 (57:22):
And eat off it at a house party earlier in
the week. If you need a table.

Speaker 9 (57:25):
Yeah, but you're also the people who didn't know Ajax
brain wipe was named after Ajax.

Speaker 1 (57:28):
That's correct. It's crazy. It still blows my mind. Tough
on grease. Tough on grease. Yeah. Get it? Okay.

Speaker 6 (57:35):
Grease.

Speaker 1 (57:36):
I'd still go to the other lesbian and I'd just
be like, oh, it's not working, just to save my nap.
They bite. Yeah, man, they lure on those things. No, no, no,
the babies.

Speaker 3 (57:46):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (57:46):
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was hoping it was the lesbians.
I think lesbians bite a bit. The lesbians bite too.
If they're into it.

Speaker 2 (57:50):
Yay.

Speaker 1 (57:51):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (57:51):
Always check with a potential lesbian partner if they're into
biting before biting.

Speaker 1 (57:55):
You don't bite without consent. You check out if they're
into a bite. Maybe a like nibble. Okay. Moving on.
Moving on. Check the resistance. So prolactin. Prolactin spikes post-orgasm. Oh.
And men are massive. I can't wait to have one
of those one day. I'm also looking forward to it.
Wonderful things.

Speaker 4 (58:14):
So it spikes so heavily in men, it actually puts
them to sleep.

Speaker 1 (58:19):
Yes. You see, this is why we don't have time
for cuddles because we need to sleep. We want to.

Speaker 3 (58:23):
Roll over and be like, let's just discuss our future.

Speaker 1 (58:27):
Let's discuss everything. Let's stay up because we're all excited.

Speaker 4 (58:30):
The cuddling hormone is also present, but the prolactin outspikes
the oxytocin and the men.

Speaker 3 (58:35):
Are just like, Sometimes I am, like, shocked at how
fast afterwards a man will be like, yay, great.

Speaker 1 (58:43):
It's like, don't you go to sleep. I'm just going
to go clean myself up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes, we're
going to the bathroom to do our business. Always we.
Always we. And then we come back. Oh, look at
this guy.

Speaker 7 (58:54):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (58:55):
Look at this person.

Speaker 1 (58:55):
And deep asleep too is a natural sleep. So it's
not our fault.

Speaker 3 (58:59):
But it's also, that's why it's so good, like, if
you can't sleep, have a little, you.

Speaker 1 (59:05):
Know, it's so good for you. That's actually very true.
You don't need to tell guys that, Hayley. They know.

Speaker 4 (59:12):
Prolactin does. It's headline job, of course, it's in the name,
the breast milk production. It also suppresses fertility hormones, which
is why some people use that whole, while you're exclusively breastfeeding,
you can't get pregnant again, talk to Christine Smith and
ask her why her sons are 15 months apart.

Speaker 1 (59:27):
All your dad's is horny. He's a horndog. It's not
a no contraception.

Speaker 4 (59:30):
He's a horndog and it runs in the bloody family.

Speaker 1 (59:33):
Because some people will have the baby. I hated that.
I hated that. Did you not like the barking?

Speaker 3 (59:38):
Some people will have the baby and like a month later,
you know, as soon as they're like safe to go again,
they'll go.

Speaker 1 (59:44):
Again and get pregnant. I know.

Speaker 4 (59:46):
And you so easily can. But it can suppress the
fertility hormones. So it's also one of the overall broad
stress hormones alongside cortisol and adrenaline that we've talked about.
Dads get a bump too. New fathers show measurable prolactin increases.
Not enough to latch on the nip though. Not enough
to latch or maybe keep that one out of their mouth.

(01:00:06):
It's also involved in our immune system. It's being heavily
researched about exactly how it does, but there's research that
a spike in the old prolactin could be good for
keeping away the The ills.

Speaker 1 (01:00:17):
Oh, okay. The ailments. There's just another.

Speaker 4 (01:00:19):
Reason to play with yourself this afternoon.

Speaker 1 (01:00:22):
Like you needed one.

Speaker 4 (01:00:23):
Like you needed one. So today's, oh, birds and fish
have it too. Just quickly to finish on. Birds and
fish have it too. And you might be like, that's
weird because they don't breastfeed. They don't have breasts. No.

Speaker 1 (01:00:32):
Wait, fish don't have breasts? Have you seen a breast
on a salmon? Imagine it. Yeah, you're like, can I
get two salmon breasts and a salmon thigh? The breast
would be dry like chicken. Oh, yeah. Not oily and lovely.

Speaker 4 (01:00:48):
I've got to get a bit more salmon in my diet.
Great for the short-term memory because I can't do the
fish tablets because they make me burt.

Speaker 1 (01:00:53):
I'm literally looking at fish oil right now.

Speaker 4 (01:00:57):
Yum. So it helps birds build their nests, apparently, and
fish to regulate salt balance.

Speaker 6 (01:01:02):
Lovely.

Speaker 1 (01:01:03):
But it's there and it's doing something different than somebody else.

Speaker 4 (01:01:04):
So today's fact of the day is thanks to Prolactin, ladies,
you can't blame your men for just letting it nod
off after.

Speaker 1 (01:01:13):
Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

Speaker 8 (01:01:30):
Play ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Hayley.

Speaker 1 (01:01:32):
Now, I want to know, what did you steal from work?

Speaker 3 (01:01:34):
I mean, obviously, you know, if you sort of frauded,
you know, $ 100, 000 through your bank account or something like that.

Speaker 1 (01:01:40):
People do, though, don't they? Oh, yeah, they do. That's
happened in my family. You can text in and be
completely anonymous. Yeah, totally. We skipped over that pretty quick.
It's happened in your family?

Speaker 7 (01:01:49):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:01:49):
You can't go into details. Jesus. Yeah, the bitch.

Speaker 4 (01:01:52):
I always close my mind when, like, wasn't there a
woman who stole half a million dollars from a tertiary education?

Speaker 1 (01:01:58):
You're like... A facility? How did that even have half
a million dollars floating.

Speaker 4 (01:02:02):
Around over half a million years for you to siphon
off without it being noticed?

Speaker 1 (01:02:05):
I'm sort of talking your pencils. You know, your stationery.

Speaker 4 (01:02:08):
Well, maybe your work does have good stationery.

Speaker 1 (01:02:12):
Maybe.

Speaker 4 (01:02:13):
You know, when I'm out in a grass, I use
it a lot for work, but I'll grab a ring-botted
notebook from.

Speaker 1 (01:02:18):
The stationery cupboard here at work. What kind of work
are you using it for? Just writing down your top sixes?
Some facts and thoughts. You might be out and about
and see something funny and write it down. Write it down.
If only there was some kind of digital device.

Speaker 4 (01:02:30):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:02:32):
So I talk about this because obviously Practical Magic 2
is out. I'm so excited to see it. But Nicole
Kidman and Sandra Bullock have been doing lots of.

Speaker 1 (01:02:39):
Media for it.

Speaker 3 (01:02:41):
And they were asked, did they take anything from the
original 1998 film set?

Speaker 1 (01:02:46):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:02:46):
And Sandra Bullock revealed, yes, she did. She took a
series of skirts that she'd worn and one in particular
that's like quite famous. She was worn in a cemetery
scene from the first movie. Like I can immediately know
what skirt she's talking about. And she had it for ages.
And the reason why this has come out is because
they were looking to have it back for.

Speaker 1 (01:03:08):
The new film. And she was like, I took it.
I've still got it. And she brought it back and
it's in the movie. Oh, wow. Okay. Wait, she still
fits it? Yeah, it's called peptides, bro. It's called GLP-1.
It's crazy.

Speaker 4 (01:03:22):
It's crazy that if she hadn't taken it, would they
store something like that for that long?

Speaker 1 (01:03:27):
I think they do, yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:03:27):
They do store movie things. And then there's whole warehouses
where other movies will use old movie stuff.

Speaker 1 (01:03:34):
Right. But something is, yeah. Nothing iconic like that though.

Speaker 7 (01:03:37):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:03:38):
Surely not. That would just sort of stay put.

Speaker 3 (01:03:39):
But yeah, she stole it and she told no one
and they had to come clean because they were wanting
to recreate it.

Speaker 1 (01:03:44):
She's like, I've actually got it. Well, maybe you work
at a place and you're a merchandiser and you just
skim a few food products or I don't know. Someone
works at a coffee shop and they take the beans,
take some beans home from the machine.

Speaker 2 (01:03:56):
Yum.

Speaker 1 (01:03:56):
You would, wouldn't you? Anonymous place. You can be anonymous.
9696 to text us. 0800 dial ZM to call us now. Oh,
my God. Okay.

Speaker 3 (01:04:04):
What did you steal from work?

Speaker 1 (01:04:06):
Anonymous. Always good when it's anonymous. What have you stolen
from work?

Speaker 6 (01:04:11):
Well, the other day I was poking around in the
copy room looking, I don't know, just being nosy, really.

Speaker 1 (01:04:17):
And I opened the drawer.

Speaker 4 (01:04:19):
Yeah.

Speaker 5 (01:04:19):
And it was a four-pack of AAA batteries.

Speaker 1 (01:04:23):
Oh, wow. Really good quality ones. Were they like the
Energizer ones, the Energizer extra long? Yeah, yeah. Okay, and
so you stole them?

Speaker 6 (01:04:35):
Yeah, I just popped them in my pocket.

Speaker 1 (01:04:37):
Yeah, batteries, mate. You can never have too many batteries.
They're expensive, and you sometimes just run out.

Speaker 6 (01:04:42):
Triple A's are so expensive.

Speaker 1 (01:04:45):
Oh, that's a good score. Do you know who's going
to miss those? No one. No one. They'll just order more,
won't they? They'll just order more.

Speaker 5 (01:04:51):
No one.

Speaker 1 (01:04:52):
Get it. And they didn't give you that pay rise
last time. Do you know what? We endorse this message. Anonymous,
thank you. Suzanne, what have you stolen from work?

Speaker 5 (01:05:01):
I took a 4.2 kilo lobster.

Speaker 1 (01:05:04):
Yum! That's a heavy lobster. How do you smoke a lobster?

Speaker 5 (01:05:08):
It was huge. It actually fitted in my backpack and
still had his legs and his head poking out.

Speaker 1 (01:05:14):
Get out of here. You're a terrible, terrible thief. Why
was there a lobster at work?

Speaker 5 (01:05:19):
I was actually not the only one. This restaurant was
closing down back in the 90s and it was a
720-seater restaurant at Circular Quay. And it was stock take
just before the closing down. And honestly, the managers were
driving their cars up and filling their boots up with
cases of wine.

Speaker 1 (01:05:35):
Holy shit. Oh, my God.

Speaker 5 (01:05:38):
I'm standing there in the middle like, I'm a tree
in the desert here.

Speaker 1 (01:05:43):
Grab a lobster, the biggest one you get.

Speaker 5 (01:05:46):
Oh, my God. It was a seafood restaurant, so they
had a massive tank with live lobsters, king crab, mud crab.

Speaker 8 (01:05:52):
Everything was alive.

Speaker 7 (01:05:53):
I was going crazy.

Speaker 5 (01:05:54):
So I grabbed them out of the tank, and I'm
just like, well, fuck you, I'll jump on board.

Speaker 1 (01:05:59):
That's what I would have said too. And the first
three of us.

Speaker 5 (01:06:01):
I put him to sleep in the fridge. And we
ate him the next day. And I put him on
the side of the car as we're driving back to
my place in Sydney. And I put him on the
edge of the door. And this car drove up beside us.
And all he could see was this alien head. And
it's as big as my head.

Speaker 6 (01:06:19):
Ah!

Speaker 5 (01:06:20):
Just sitting at the window. And he almost crapped himself
and drove off the other lane.

Speaker 1 (01:06:24):
Oh, my God. But it took three of us to
eat him.

Speaker 5 (01:06:28):
It was just unbelievable.

Speaker 3 (01:06:32):
How much would a customer have paid to get that
four point? Because I've had like a one point something, Katie. And, man,
it cost a pretty penny.

Speaker 5 (01:06:42):
Okay, so back in the day, it was $ 100 for
a 700-gram lobster.

Speaker 1 (01:06:48):
Yeah, bro. Oh, my God.

Speaker 5 (01:06:51):
And this was like a king crab that you shared
among four people.

Speaker 1 (01:06:54):
What a wild story. I love this.

Speaker 5 (01:06:57):
You used to be able to come to the tank
and pick the guy you wanted.

Speaker 1 (01:07:00):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 5 (01:07:01):
We weighed him in front of you.

Speaker 1 (01:07:03):
Wow. I don't know if we do that now anymore, Suzanne.
I don't know if we... Yeah, I don't know if
we do that anymore. Okay. Was it Bilson's, Suzanne? Was
it Bilson's? Was it Bilson's?

Speaker 5 (01:07:14):
No, it was actually called the Waterfront.

Speaker 1 (01:07:16):
I'll go and do some Googling to find out what
it was called. Okay, in Sydney, back in the day. Suzanne,
thank you for sharing. Mike, what have you stolen from work?
Probably pales in comparison to a lobster. Nothing. No, I
just buy an extra two.

Speaker 3 (01:07:29):
Cash card.

Speaker 1 (01:07:31):
Sorry, you do what? You just cut it out.

Speaker 7 (01:07:33):
So I'll go and buy some milk when the team
need it, and usually we go through about two litres
of milk, but I buy an extra.

Speaker 1 (01:07:41):
I shot a bit of milk in me. Oh, yeah, right.
We used to do that all the time with the
fuel card when we worked at the Edge, didn't we?
We'd add a pipe.

Speaker 3 (01:07:48):
You get the hose and you go, ah, quickly, it's yours.

Speaker 4 (01:07:51):
Not as much as Chang, who used to work with
Head Take, his car and the promo car and park
them both outside and then fill up the promo car
and then park it, but put the fuel pump on
the ground and then drove his car and fill it
up with the same thing.

Speaker 1 (01:08:01):
Yeah, but then they made it fuel and oil only
on the thing. It said, oh, yeah, so we didn't
allow lollies. Yeah. That's ridiculous. Okay, we'll keep your texts
coming in. 9696, what did you steal from work?

Speaker 3 (01:08:15):
Someone else said that our last caller was the new Damien,
here for the yarn.

Speaker 1 (01:08:19):
Great story. Lobsters was her mirror.

Speaker 3 (01:08:22):
Paracetamol, ibuprofen, I'm a pharmacist. Anti-fungal cream sometimes.

Speaker 7 (01:08:26):
Oh yeah, nice.

Speaker 1 (01:08:27):
Thrush. A bit of thrush there. Not thrush. You don't
have to be embarrassed.

Speaker 4 (01:08:30):
I use the Urgent Feminine products for my entire period every.

Speaker 1 (01:08:34):
Month at work.

Speaker 4 (01:08:35):
If they want me to work while I'm bleeding out
of my vagina, they can pay for my menstruation.

Speaker 1 (01:08:41):
Fair enough. I get it. They're expensive, man. Why not?

Speaker 3 (01:08:46):
Working at KFC, I've acquired a lot of gravy, KFC seasoning,
chicken salt.

Speaker 1 (01:08:51):
Yum.

Speaker 3 (01:08:52):
Even frozen popcorn chicken sometimes, and fresh chicken, Wicked Wings,
boneless as well.

Speaker 1 (01:08:56):
Jeez Louise. Yeah. In 2004, I worked for an airline.

Speaker 4 (01:08:59):
At Wellington Airport and the company went into liquidation and
people were going mental. They cut padlocks on the doors
so we took absolutely everything we could find. Couches, fridges, microwaves, artwork, computers,
high visibility gear, radio transmitters, anything that wasn't bolted down.

Speaker 1 (01:09:14):
Really?

Speaker 4 (01:09:15):
Yep. Luckily though, because they couldn't afford to pay our
wages or the holiday payout, so they all owed us. Right,
so you just sell that stuff.

Speaker 1 (01:09:21):
Yeah. My ex and I used to work at a bank.

Speaker 4 (01:09:26):
Wow, and that bitch stole $ 15, 000 over the span of
a few months without me knowing and got herself fired
and also got me fired because they thought I was
in on it too.

Speaker 6 (01:09:35):
What?

Speaker 1 (01:09:37):
Wait, are they still together? No. Okay, right. My manager
at Macca's.

Speaker 4 (01:09:41):
Got fired for stealing sacks of frozen chicken nuggies. I mean, temptation,
thou namest.

Speaker 1 (01:09:47):
If you're going to go down for stealing something working
at Macca's, it would be the packets of hot chocolate
fudge sauce. And sweet and sour sauce. Sweet and sour sauce.
It would be sauce heavy.

Speaker 3 (01:09:57):
I worked in a maternity ward, and even though it
was frowned upon, one day I just took home a baby. Yeah,
I've had it for nearly 30 years now.

Speaker 1 (01:10:03):
No, you misread it. The joke was he took home
a babe. Oh, took a babe home.

Speaker 4 (01:10:10):
Took a babe home because he said he had it
for 30 years now and it was frowned upon for
taking a nurse but she seems to like it.

Speaker 1 (01:10:15):
I think it might have been Rory. Some of his
sloppiest work to be honest. Yeah, that's such Rory. That
wordy Rory.

Speaker 3 (01:10:21):
Laura's messaged in though, I was an office manager and yes,
we do know when the batteries go missing.

Speaker 1 (01:10:27):
Do we have batteries in our house? We've got a
nice stationary. We do? Interesting.

Speaker 5 (01:10:31):
Do we?

Speaker 1 (01:10:31):
Interesting.

Speaker 3 (01:10:32):
I actually jumped on the scales this morning and the
batteries were dead and I was.

Speaker 1 (01:10:35):
Like, probably just as well. Nah, they don't have those batteries.
Probably just as well.

Speaker 4 (01:10:38):
No, no, no.

Speaker 1 (01:10:38):
Mine is just triple A's. I know. I thought they
were disc ones as well. My scale's on the discs.

Speaker 2 (01:10:42):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:10:43):
I'm also not getting on that scale. Bogsy's here. The
CEO's here. Good morning. Do you like our show? Bogsy,
where's your Warriors stuff? Terrible time to be talking about
stealing stuff from work when the CEO walks in, isn't it? Yeah,
the finer topic, Bogsy, is what did you steal from work?
And we said nothing. Nothing. Just the hearts of our listeners. Exactly.

Speaker 4 (01:11:03):
Just good times and smiles is all I take out
from here.

Speaker 2 (01:11:06):

Speaker 8 (01:11:08):

Speaker 3 (01:11:11):
Now, don't you guys hate it when you're wearing a
satin or silk.

Speaker 1 (01:11:17):
Dress cut on the bias? Yeah, I hate it. A
figure-hugging little number. Sticks to my hair. Yeah. See my
hair's all through it. It's really weird. Snags through the silk, eh,
in particular. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:11:30):
Well, here's a product no one asked for. It's called
the Belly Button Box.

Speaker 1 (01:11:35):
The Belly Button Box.

Speaker 3 (01:11:36):
Now, I have an opinion on this, but the Belly
Button Box is sometimes, I would say almost all women
that are not professional carved chiseled athletes on zero-carb diets have...
squish around the middle, it protects our reproductive organs because
our only purpose in life as animals is to procreate, right?

Speaker 1 (01:11:54):
Same.

Speaker 7 (01:11:55):
Amen.

Speaker 1 (01:11:55):
And mine is to... Amen. And I'm letting it down.
I apologise.

Speaker 3 (01:12:01):
But the belly button box is like a silicon little
sheet that has a sort of concave little bit and
you pop it over your belly button so that when
you are wearing a satin or silk dress, you don't
get the little Dent.

Speaker 1 (01:12:18):
The belly button dent. The belly button dent. This is
my opinion. I like the little dent.

Speaker 3 (01:12:21):
When you see a dress on a woman and you
see the little, like, dent where her belly button goes in.

Speaker 1 (01:12:27):
That's how we know where the belly button is. It's
so cute. We like that. Well, this would make it, like,
flatter so that you don't.

Speaker 3 (01:12:33):
We couldn't possibly know you have a hole in your stomach.

Speaker 1 (01:12:35):
It's a lot bigger than I thought it would be. Yeah.
It's like almost an A5 sheet of silicone.

Speaker 3 (01:12:40):
It has to tether from skin and then create a
mould over the belly button and then sort of tether
back out.

Speaker 4 (01:12:47):
You know what I mean?

Speaker 6 (01:12:47):
Right.

Speaker 1 (01:12:48):
And there's a hole so the belly button can breathe?

Speaker 7 (01:12:50):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:12:51):
Uh, no, no, no. It looks like there's a hole
on there. Yeah, there is a little hole. Okay. Because
you don't want a swampy belly button.

Speaker 7 (01:12:59):
No.

Speaker 1 (01:13:00):
Oh, yeah. You take it off at the end of
the night and it gushes. I just feel like the
silk dress or the dress would show the square. More
than it would the hole.

Speaker 4 (01:13:09):
More than it would the hole, yeah. And then everyone's like,
why have you got a square? Whereas when it's a hole,
people are like, well, I'd say the hole.

Speaker 5 (01:13:14):
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:13:14):
We love the hole. We love the belly button.

Speaker 3 (01:13:17):
If we're on a satin dress and you see this
little shadow and there's a hole in a little pooch shadow.

Speaker 5 (01:13:23):
Love.

Speaker 1 (01:13:24):
That's gorgeous. Work right there.

Speaker 4 (01:13:27):
Love, love, love.

Speaker 3 (01:13:28):
I'm just sort of sitting around. Do people just sit
around and be like, what's a product no one needs?

Speaker 1 (01:13:31):
Yeah, what's a product? What's an insecurity we can cry on? Yeah,
what can we make an insecurity that definitely is an insecurity?
Belly buttons.

Speaker 5 (01:13:36):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:13:37):
Let's make them feel like awful people for having them.
From the company that brought you Batwing Clamps.

Speaker 2 (01:13:44):

Speaker 1 (01:13:46):
When was your gut instinct spot on? You know you
get these feelings? I've got gut instincts. great intuition I've
always backed my intuition.

Speaker 3 (01:13:53):
Because sometimes you walk into a room and you're like
mmm or you see a thing you see a situation
a person you're feeling I don't know about this or
I've got a good feeling about this one first.

Speaker 1 (01:14:02):
Time I met both of you I was like never
gonna happen yeah not gonna work Well, us as a
couple or us as friends. Just broadcasters as friends. Yeah,
and you were right. Spot on. It has been a slog.
It's been a struggle. Every day. Far more work than
it should be.

Speaker 3 (01:14:17):
We started this whole weird genuine friends thing and it's like, God,
now we've got to do all this bullshit hanging out afterwards.

Speaker 1 (01:14:22):
Crow barring. We are actually going out to one of
our favourite restaurants today for lunch and then drinking with
our friends.

Speaker 6 (01:14:27):
Cauliflower.

Speaker 1 (01:14:28):
Anyway. I have a message from Dr. Shawnee here, an
audio message. I wouldn't play that on air. I wouldn't
play that on air. Careful. I'd give that an awful listen.
I was going to get him to bring a stethoscope
today because I've got a chesty cough.

Speaker 2 (01:14:40):
You're a chesty.

Speaker 1 (01:14:41):
You guys can bring it.

Speaker 4 (01:14:42):
Can you bring your stethoscope and give me a light
checkup and a boozy lunch?

Speaker 1 (01:14:45):
Yes, I can. You absolutely can. The first time I
met Dr. Shawnee, I had foot on a pub table. Yeah,
you had fungus on your foot. I've got a hip pain.
I've got hip pain. And it's shooting through my side
to my shoulder.

Speaker 7 (01:14:57):
Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 (01:14:57):
Do you know what he should bring? Those really thick needles.
They're like popsicle sticks but wider and doctors have them. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
They probably just use wooden spoons and forks now. Just
use your fingers. Glove finger. Just grab me. What I
want you to do is grab me so I can't move.

(01:15:19):
Just under the chin.

Speaker 4 (01:15:19):
Grab me by the hair, by the throat, and then
just two fingers down.

Speaker 1 (01:15:22):
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, anyway. We've been slightly sidetracked here.
Hang on, what are we talking about? Gut instincts. Yes,
gut instincts. When was your gut instinct spot on the money?
Because someone is a... Do you want a bit of
admin over there?

Speaker 4 (01:15:34):
No, it's just like this paper bagger studio and I
want to cut some holes in it and put it
on Fletcher's head and then be like, that's better.

Speaker 1 (01:15:43):
That's so mean to me. I don't know. And there
was nothing that was going to stop me. I'm like,
I'm in the middle of broadcasting this show.

Speaker 7 (01:15:49):
But we're at work right now.

Speaker 1 (01:15:51):
I have to do this. I have to do this.
Keep talking. I've got to go get some scissors. Will
you cut a hole for my head as well? Yeah, yeah.
That's actually really cute. I don't know if I'm going
to have that. I might do it sideways. No, it's
got to be that way.

Speaker 7 (01:16:03):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:16:03):
Okay.

Speaker 3 (01:16:04):
Do you like, Shannon's wearing her Warriors colours today, green
and blue, but in a nice, pretty Shannon way.

Speaker 1 (01:16:09):
You shouldn't want to wear a jersey. No, I know. Okay, anyway,
we're off track here. Again. Again. 0800, dials at Amazon
number 9696 to text in. When was your gut feeling right?

Speaker 3 (01:16:20):
There was a woman who was known for being able
to read, like, what does it mean, this gut feeling
and everything. And there's actual neurochemicals that happen inside of
us when we know something is not good for us.

Speaker 1 (01:16:31):
It's true, like... Follow your gut is great advice. Now,
we aren't talking about when you trusted your.

Speaker 4 (01:16:36):
Gut, but I did say I had an overwhelming urge
to put a paper bag on Fletcher's head and say, ah,
that's better.

Speaker 1 (01:16:42):
Okay.

Speaker 3 (01:16:43):
Do it organically like he didn't know it was coming.

Speaker 4 (01:16:48):
To explain for the people who will see this on social,
I mean, it explains itself, but it's a brown paper
bag and I've cut two eye holes in him.

Speaker 1 (01:16:54):
He knew, I need a mouth hole so I can
breathe and speak. I talk for a living.

Speaker 4 (01:16:58):
And then we've also cut him a little hat peak
so his hat can pop out there. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:17:02):
I don't know how well this is going to fit,
but let's give this a go. Yeah, this is great. Oh,
hold on, actually, babe. Hold on. Oh, my God, staples. Shit,
I broke you. Nearly scarred him for life. Nearly poked
my eyes out with some staples. Bloody Uber Eats bag. Yeah.
It's going to smell like bloody beef sandwich in there,
by the way. Oh, yeah, okay, right. You've got to
get the slit in.

Speaker 4 (01:17:21):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (01:17:21):
Get the peak of the hat. Okay, now say your line.
Say your line. Okay, does it work better now? Do
I look better? Yeah, that's better. Now say your line.

Speaker 7 (01:17:30):
I did.

Speaker 1 (01:17:30):
There we go. That's better. Yeah, that's better. The fit's...
Would you? I would now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I told you.
It's the only thing that's ever held me back from
hitting on Fletch. The face. It's my face. It's that face. Okay, yeah, right.

Speaker 4 (01:17:45):
Do you know, we joke and everything, but I bet
if anybody in the studio could hook up with someone
wearing a paper bag on their head, it'd be Fletch.

Speaker 1 (01:17:52):
It'd happen like that.

Speaker 4 (01:17:53):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:17:54):
You know what I'm going to put? This is my
profile photo. It's his earphones. It's his earphones. Oh, you
need to do headphones. Oh, my God. On the apps.

Speaker 3 (01:18:02):
Put the headphones on and do a photo for Fletch Listens.

Speaker 1 (01:18:06):
He's like, I couldn't concentrate. Okay, let's get back to
the phone. And you also, you put the mouth hole
in the wrong place. It's too low. I wear my nose.

Speaker 4 (01:18:13):
Do the scale of your face very well. Let's take
some texts now, Hayley. When could you trust your gut instinct?
Because gut instincts are more than just woo-woo. There are
chemicals happening in the brain.

Speaker 1 (01:18:25):
Yeah, trust the gut. Somebody said... I'm so much better
working alongside that now. I'm not distracted. I'm not distracted
by that beautiful face. By my hotness. No, no, but
your minginess. Okay, right.

Speaker 4 (01:18:35):
I had a gut instinct, yes, like when you, you know,
when you, like, drive past roadkill and you're like.

Speaker 1 (01:18:40):
Oh, I just can't stop looking.

Speaker 7 (01:18:41):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:18:43):
Oh, yeah, contest lines. I saw contest lines. Have another look. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 7 (01:18:46):
Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:18:46):
The eyes have been popped out. Oh, I have another look.
Don't bully me. I had a guy.

Speaker 7 (01:18:50):
Instinct.

Speaker 4 (01:18:50):
My partner had cheated on me on a trip to Australia.
I was home pregnant with our first baby. It was
so strong, I gaslit him into confessing.

Speaker 1 (01:18:57):
What?

Speaker 4 (01:18:58):
By pretending someone had seen him doing it and had
told me, and he confessed. Ex-partner, I must add. Married
now to the most amazing human ever. So old mate
actually did me a huge favour by.

Speaker 1 (01:19:07):
Cheating on me. Yes, yes, yes. They often do. Someone's great.
Really good. She said I have IBS. I won't be
following my guts. Follow your gut to the bloody toilet.
You can take the paper bag off if it's distracting
to you.

Speaker 5 (01:19:17):
Yeah, it was.

Speaker 1 (01:19:18):
It's a bit hard to work now, though. Oh, yeah!

Speaker 4 (01:19:23):
I sort of forgot it was nice to get a break.
I was on a beach trip with my friends and family.
My husband and I were enjoying the weather and I
just had this sinking feeling that something was going to happen.
We were approached by this woman who asked us for help.
My husband tried to help her jump to the car.
While he was doing it, I had this feeling that
she was fishy. Crept back over to our beach spot
and she was there helping herself to our wallets. So

(01:19:44):
I yelled out and chased her. She fled and I
had to use my grade school rugby instincts to tackle
her again.

Speaker 1 (01:19:49):
Wow.

Speaker 4 (01:19:50):
Good.

Speaker 1 (01:19:51):
You never trust anyone overseas. I mean, you don't trust
anyone in life.

Speaker 4 (01:19:54):
No.

Speaker 1 (01:19:55):
Really, let alone travelling. What's he saying? Come on. Never
trust anyone ever. Full stop. Ever.

Speaker 4 (01:20:01):
I had an interview. I was offered the job. I
just had this feeling it wasn't the right place for me.
Turns out the guy who would have been my boss
had sexually harassed a number of employees.

Speaker 1 (01:20:08):
Oh, wow. I was seven.

Speaker 4 (01:20:10):
I cried when I was asked to be the flower
girl for my uncle and his wife-to-be. I didn't like
her for some reason, and they ended up divorced soon after.

Speaker 1 (01:20:16):
She knew. If you're nay, you're nay. If you're nay,
you're nay. If you're nay, you're nay.

Speaker 4 (01:20:22):
I matched with a guy on Tinder years ago while talking.
Something seemed off.

Speaker 1 (01:20:26):
Bit more of a dig. He had a secret family. Oh, wow. Yeah.
That's probably because the profile photo was him with a
paper bag on his head.

Speaker 5 (01:20:34):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:20:35):
Didn't recognise them. Can't recognise.

Speaker 4 (01:20:37):
And, like, some smaller humans beside them with, like, their
faces blurred out. Paper bags as well, no smaller paper bags.
And then a woman human on the other side, sort
of half cropped out.

Speaker 1 (01:20:44):
Yeah. All with paper bags on their head. That'll do it.
I went to have my daughter. The minute she was born,
I knew something wasn't wrong. No one believed me.

Speaker 4 (01:20:50):
All the tests and everything. Two long years later, she
was diagnosed with a rare genetic condition.

Speaker 1 (01:20:55):
Mum knows best. Mum knows, mum knows.

Speaker 2 (01:20:56):
That was rough.

Speaker 1 (01:20:57):
Mum knows, mum knows.

Speaker 4 (01:21:06):
Do that game where you say a word and you
go around and it has to get progressively harder to understand.

Speaker 1 (01:21:10):
Say mum knows. Okay, mum knows. Okay, we're going to
do this game, Fletch. You say it each time it
gets worse. It has to get worse.

Speaker 6 (01:21:15):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (01:21:16):
Well, mom knows, mom knows. Mom knows, mom knows. Mom knows,
mom knows. Mom knows, mom knows. Mom knows, mom knows.

Speaker 2 (01:21:25):
Mom knows, mom knows.

Speaker 1 (01:21:26):
Mom knows, mom knows. Mom knows, mom knows.

Speaker 2 (01:21:30):
Mom knows, mom knows.

Speaker 1 (01:21:33):
Mom knows, mom knows. This is our job, by the way. Yeah.
Fun times. Where's my paycheck? I got a new tattoo yesterday.

(01:21:58):
Another one? You're so addicted.

Speaker 3 (01:21:59):
I'm so addicted. Well, I'm on a mission to fill
the right leg. Getting that all done.

Speaker 1 (01:22:04):
Right.

Speaker 3 (01:22:05):
And I've got two really solid tattoos. I've got a
big sacred heart right on my thigh. And then to
the side of that same thigh is my.

Speaker 1 (01:22:14):
Horse with Vaughn riding it.

Speaker 7 (01:22:15):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:22:16):
Which if you just.

Speaker 3 (01:22:17):
Joined the show, Vaughn got a hat. A listener said,
come sit on my horse. People took photos of you
on the horse. My friend, a tattoo artist, Sammy, said,
that's a great tattoo. I got the tattoo.

Speaker 1 (01:22:29):
Yeah, you weren't sleeping together, even though it did make
it look like you were sleeping with them.

Speaker 3 (01:22:34):
Tell you what, I wouldn't have much leg room left
if I got a tattoo for every person I'd slept with.

Speaker 1 (01:22:38):
Do you know what I mean? She's head to toe.

Speaker 3 (01:22:40):
So anyway, yesterday, so I was at this new studio.
I haven't had a tattoo from Daniel before. And it
was great. Every time I get a new tattoo, you know,
they always like to look around your other pieces of work.

Speaker 1 (01:22:53):
And I will say.

Speaker 3 (01:22:54):
10 out of 10. Vaughan's tattoo will always get a,
oh my God, that's so cool.

Speaker 4 (01:22:59):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:22:59):
Because it's done so well. Shout out to Sammy at
Sammy Tattoos.

Speaker 1 (01:23:02):
Like it's so good. Even like we'll be out at
bars and stuff and listeners will ask to see it. Yes, yes, yes.
Like it's crazy.

Speaker 3 (01:23:08):
One, it's so realistic that people can't believe it's actually real.
And two, they can't believe I did that. Which was
kind of the story yesterday when they're looking around, they're like, shit,
this horse.

Speaker 1 (01:23:17):
Oh my God, it's amazing. I was like, yeah, yeah,
it's cool. This is, you know, by Sammy and And
then they were like, what's.

Speaker 3 (01:23:22):
The story behind it? And I was like, oh, it's
actually my friend, Vaughn. And they were like, oh, okay, yeah, right.
And then I was like, yeah, well, we work together
and we're on a horse.

Speaker 1 (01:23:33):
So I got it. The rest is history. The rest
is history. I got it tattooed. And they were like,
so you guys are just friends? And I was like, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:23:39):
He was like, I don't think I've ever really come
across someone who just sort of randomly got a friend.

Speaker 1 (01:23:43):
Is he dead?

Speaker 6 (01:23:44):
No.

Speaker 1 (01:23:45):
I tell you what, though, when I do die.

Speaker 4 (01:23:47):
You were first, because no doubt there'll be a river
of people getting Vaughan tattoos when I die.

Speaker 1 (01:23:51):
Honestly, they were finding it. And Jim, not Jim Henson,
Jim Morrison. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Everyone was getting Jim Henson
tattoos when he died.

Speaker 3 (01:24:00):
It sort of was the first time in a long time,
since Reddit went a bit nuts, that I was confronted
with how odd it was, how readily I just got
a photo of.

Speaker 1 (01:24:10):
Your friend on your leg.

Speaker 3 (01:24:11):
And then when I got this new tattoo yesterday, it's
like a little corfe branch to split up the two
bigger tattoos, something a bit softer. I came in this
morning and showed you and Fletch's first thing is like,
and yet still.

Speaker 1 (01:24:23):
No tattoo of me. No tattoo of Fletch. Unbelievable. It'll happen.
See ya, see ya later. Actually, I'm going to have
to stop you there. That's copyrighted. Susie Cato is a
very good friend of mine. She's already sued me twice.
So if you could maybe get her to drop her
litigious action, that would be great. Tell her I'll review
her five stars if she does the same for this podcast.
And then she tells all her friends. And if you're listening,

(01:24:45):
maybe give it five stars as well.

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Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 11th September 2026

Episode Transcript

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;} Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 11th September 2026