Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 15th September 2026 - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
From the ZM Podcast Network. This is Fletch, Fawn and
Hayley's Big Pod. Thanks to Animates, making happy happen for pets.
Good morning, happy Tuesday. Fletch, Fawn and Hayley, welcome to
the show. No trains in studio today. No, yep, not
broadcasting from a train platform today. Just your regular old
studio broadcast.

Speaker 2 (00:22):
See those numbers? 25,000 more train passengers went on the
train yesterday than usual.

Speaker 1 (00:29):
That's pretty good stuff. People are excited. People were just
doing loops. People were so excited just checking out the
new stations. We're very happy with May. I feel like
when people come to Auckland for a concert too, like
from out of town, they're just going to have a nosy.

Speaker 3 (00:42):
I would.

Speaker 1 (00:43):
Oh, so good.

Speaker 2 (00:44):
My parents have said next time we're up, you'll have
to show us how the train works.

Speaker 1 (00:48):
Of course. Well, ZM's World Tour, your chance at 8
o'clock this morning to go in the draw to get
to Morocco. Thanks to Intrepid Travel. Up for grabs. We've
got an epic 10-day adventure. I'd love this. Me too.
You get to pick someone to go with you. You
can or wouldn't you? You would camel, absolutely.

Speaker 4 (01:09):
I've got a great picture of my parents in Morocco
on board a camel, holding hands across camels.

Speaker 1 (01:16):
Oh, cute. Really gorgeous photo. Oh, cute.

Speaker 2 (01:19):
But camels are meant to carry, eh? Elephants not. Elephants pull,
camels carry.

Speaker 1 (01:23):
Yeah, so. So we can ride a camel. We can
upload that one. Guilt free. Like me. Maybe delete the
one from 2013 Thailand.

Speaker 5 (01:31):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:31):
Your chance to win as well. Around 20 past seven
this morning, we've got Chemist Warehouse gift cards up for grabs.
But when you've got the top six for us... Yes.

Speaker 2 (01:39):
Kim Jong-un has said, Koreans need to have more state-sanctioned fun.
That's basically the equivalent of your Christian friend saying we
should do activities.

Speaker 6 (01:47):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:48):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:49):
Yeah.

Speaker 7 (01:49):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:50):
State-sanctioned fun. The top six ways to have some state-sanctioned
fun coming up on the show.

Speaker 1 (01:54):
But next.

Speaker 2 (01:55):
We've talked about the Apple Duo, the folding screens, the
new burgundy Apple.

Speaker 1 (02:01):
Oh, yeah, it's nice.

Speaker 2 (02:01):
All the new photo features of the new Apple phones.

Speaker 1 (02:04):
But what about the Apple apples? The fruit. Fruit News next.

Speaker 8 (02:10):
The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughan and Hayley.

Speaker 1 (02:14):
Multiple problems with the story I'm about to tell you.

Speaker 9 (02:16):
Oh, no.

Speaker 1 (02:17):
Multiple. I want you to know from the outset, I'm
not entirely happy with this situation. Oh, what's happened, Vaughan?
What's got you so upset? What's got you so worked up? Apples.
We love apples. Love apples. Have one on the way
to work every morning.

Speaker 6 (02:30):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (02:30):
I usually finish it by the railway lines from my place.
Do you chuck the pip out, did it? No, I
eat the whole thing. Oh, that's right, you do. You're disgusting.
I eat everything. So feral.

Speaker 2 (02:38):
The only thing I toss out the window is the
little tiny stalk at the top because I pre-removed the
sticker the night before because I always put it on
the end of the bench.

Speaker 1 (02:45):
That's smart.

Speaker 3 (02:46):
Give it a wash.

Speaker 10 (02:46):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (02:47):
When med students work on your body when you die,
because you're donating your body to science, they're just going
to find apple trees inside of you. Little mini bonsais.
Mini bonsai apple trees.

Speaker 3 (02:58):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (02:59):
Little mini bonsais growing in all the, like, walls of
the room.

Speaker 11 (03:02):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (03:02):
When I get my colonoscopy later this year, they'll be like, sir,
you said... Riddled with apple trees.

Speaker 1 (03:06):
You're absolutely right. I hope you lasered them off. Little
pips in your colon. There's a new apple. It's called
the Jolie. J-O-L-I. Okay. Jolie.

Speaker 3 (03:16):
Jolie.

Speaker 1 (03:17):
Jolie. Jolie. Jolie. Beautiful. It means something in French.

Speaker 3 (03:21):
Jolie.

Speaker 1 (03:22):
Jolie. Très jolie. You know, like pretty. Here's where my
problem starts. I don't mind that it's a bigger than
a normal apple. It's been designed to be bigger than
a normal apple. I like that.

Speaker 2 (03:33):
This has taken over a decade of breeding, testing, and development,
but somehow there's already 270 hectares of these trees planted
throughout Aotearoa.

Speaker 1 (03:42):
270?

Speaker 2 (03:42):
What's your problem with this? It is specifically designed to
be a sharing apple.

Speaker 1 (03:48):
A what? We share apples.

Speaker 2 (03:50):
We share apples, but that's Fletcher's third apple for the day,
so we just get a slice of this guy eats
a lot of fruit.

Speaker 3 (03:56):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (03:57):
It's specifically designed to be a sharing apple, a family
sharing apple, and that's how it's being marketed in Vietnam.
And Vietnam is the only market currently selling this apple.
Is it? My problem is, it is. I want this apple,
and I don't want to share an apple. I know.
Sometimes you go to the supermarket there. They don't have
my favourite apples. They're tiny. And I'm not a... Designed

(04:18):
to bring families together. Growing up, you always had a Gala.
It was either Gala or Granny. And that was it. Nah,
I felt like there weren't even that many choices. There
were no Pacific Roses around. My favourite. The Rose is
the best apple. It's crisp. It doesn't have that motley.
It's never flowery. It's always sweet. So good. Granny Smith's a...

(04:39):
A hard-wearing apple. Baking only or juice. I don't like
the waxy skin.

Speaker 2 (04:43):
I'll give them a peel, but every other apple I'll
eat skin and all. But if I'm just going to
eat a Granny Smith, I've got to peel it waxy skin.

Speaker 1 (04:48):
Waxy and tart. Nobody's just eating a Granny Smith. No, no, no, no.
How embarrassing. Yeah. It's weird. So sharing as in you'd
slice it up and... Do you have an average diameter?
I don't have an average diameter. I'm trying to look
at it. To me, it looks like an apple.

Speaker 2 (05:02):
If you think you're annoyed, wait for this. In blind
taste tests... The Jolie got seven out of nine.

Speaker 1 (05:10):
Why are they going out of nine?

Speaker 11 (05:11):
Exactly.

Speaker 1 (05:13):
Why is it going out of nine? Make it ten.
What are you writing things out of nine for? It's
either out of five or ten. You don't make something
out of nine. No. That's madness.

Speaker 3 (05:22):
No.

Speaker 4 (05:22):
So it's going to bring billions of dollars to the
Apple portfolio of the creators of this Apple.

Speaker 3 (05:28):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (05:28):
It represents over a decade of breeding, testing, and growing.

Speaker 2 (05:33):
So there's a licensing fee if you want to grow them,
which will cost you $ 100, 000 a hectare.

Speaker 1 (05:36):
Well, can't I just buy an apple from the supermarket
and plant those seeds? No, because every apple's different.

Speaker 9 (05:42):
Oh, boo.

Speaker 1 (05:42):
We've talked about this.

Speaker 2 (05:43):
Remember, if you plant the seeds, if you eat an
apple and you're like, this is delicious, I'm saving the seeds,
the apple tree that grows from the seeds.

Speaker 1 (05:49):
Will be different to the parent tree. They're all cloned
and grafted.

Speaker 3 (05:53):
Oh, okay, right.

Speaker 1 (05:53):
Oh, grafting. Yeah, they graft them onto different, like, rootstock
and stuff. Yeah, right. Of course they are. Yeah, of
course they do. Yeah, of course they do. Gosh, this
is hot apple news. Hot apple news, yeah.

Speaker 4 (06:02):
I mean, we'll try one because we do like to
share our apple in the late morning.

Speaker 1 (06:07):
But, yeah, I think an apple is an individual fruit.

Speaker 2 (06:11):
It's of the same designer Apple portfolio as Envy and Jazz.

Speaker 1 (06:15):
I love a Jazz. I don't mind, though. I don't
mind a Jazz. But it's still no Rose. No. Yeah,
it's no Rose. Rose or Pacific Rose. Those are the
cream of the crop.

Speaker 8 (06:25):
Play ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Hayley.

Speaker 1 (06:28):
Flesh, Fawn and Hayley, silly little pose, silly little pose.

Speaker 12 (06:33):
It is so silly, silly, silly, that silly little pose.

Speaker 2 (06:46):
So the little poll today is how would you describe
your skin? Would you describe it as oily or would
you describe it as dry?

Speaker 1 (06:53):
Dry, man. I'm dry. I come from a dry line
of Sprouse. I'd say I'm more dry. I'm definitely dry
over oily.

Speaker 3 (07:00):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (07:00):
And I prefer it that way.

Speaker 4 (07:02):
No, I mean, I literally, I'm just constantly dry. And look,
I can see my skin's dry now. I moisturised last
night and tonight and this morning.

Speaker 1 (07:10):
I'm not that dry.

Speaker 4 (07:11):
Yeah, my dad's like a biscuit and I've inherited that. It's, yeah,
I'd love a little bit more moisture.

Speaker 1 (07:17):
A little bit more moisture. Men are moist.

Speaker 4 (07:19):
Women, we moisturise head to toe. And men will get
out of the shower, they'll towel off, and they'll just
put their clothes on.

Speaker 1 (07:24):
It's absurd. I'd snap in half. I'd turn into dust.
Is it because we've never, so our body's not expecting it?
I don't know.

Speaker 11 (07:32):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (07:33):
I wonder that when people moisturise too much. It's like
that with you guys and the lip balms. I never
lip balm. You constantly lip balm.

Speaker 3 (07:40):
Mm-hmm.

Speaker 1 (07:41):
Get addicted. Yeah, maybe. The body just gets a bit
used to it. I'd probably run more on the dry side,
but I'd rather be that than oily. That's horrible. I
hate when my skin's oily. Yeah. I hate it. I
love it. Yeah, well, 70% of people are currently running
a dry rig. Dry rig! A 30% oil rig. Yeah, right.

Speaker 2 (08:00):
Yeah, so we're on the drier side of things. That
might be a seasonal situation as well. Definitely drier in winter.
Tony said, option three, perfectly well hydrated.

Speaker 1 (08:08):
Come on, guys. Surely your listeners are better than this.

Speaker 3 (08:11):
No, no, no.

Speaker 1 (08:11):
Tony, we're talking by default.

Speaker 4 (08:13):
No, I'm not talking about, I take care of my dryness.

Speaker 1 (08:16):
But my base level is dry. Your base level is dry.

Speaker 2 (08:19):
Matt said, at 41, my oily skin that's prone to
breakouts is keeping me connected to my youth.

Speaker 1 (08:24):
You're cute. So he's got a bit of crazy when
you get a pimple, eh?

Speaker 11 (08:27):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (08:27):
Not really. I have them 24-7.

Speaker 2 (08:30):
Lottie said, my skin is always a thirsty bitch no
matter how much I drink or moisturise daily.

Speaker 3 (08:35):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (08:36):
She's thirsty. She's a sponge. Rachel, chemo.

Speaker 2 (08:40):
Never heard about that side effect, do you? It dries
out your skin while also causing massive breakouts.

Speaker 9 (08:45):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (08:45):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (08:46):
Definitely.

Speaker 4 (08:47):
I know Dai Henwood. He's dry Henwood. Ever since he's
been doing chemo, he's always like.

Speaker 1 (08:51):
Man, do you get dry?

Speaker 9 (08:52):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (08:53):
Dry, dry.

Speaker 2 (08:54):
Amber said both. So dry it's peeling in some places
and extra oily in others.

Speaker 9 (08:58):
Oh, wow.

Speaker 1 (08:59):
She wants a bit of a balance.

Speaker 2 (09:00):
I think she wants some sort of evening out of it.
Edina says, it's always been oily sensitive. And let me
tell you, that is a bitch of a combination.

Speaker 1 (09:09):
Wow. What is oily sensitive?

Speaker 4 (09:11):
Sensitive, you'd maybe get a bit of like eczema dry,
but you'd also get a bit of acne.

Speaker 1 (09:16):
That's a beautiful kiss from both devils. Isn't it? Yeah.
And Marie said, and deep in the Effudix treatment. If you, dicks.
So it's basically fallen off of the home radio. You
can't say that.

Speaker 3 (09:28):
If you.

Speaker 1 (09:28):
I just did.

Speaker 2 (09:28):
Remember they used to say it on the ad?

Speaker 1 (09:33):
What's it for?

Speaker 2 (09:34):
If you, dicks, it's a prescription medicine containing 5% used
to treat sun-damaged skin, precancerous sunspots, and superficial skin cancers.

Speaker 1 (09:43):
Oh, wow. Wow. Okay. So get on the if you, dicks.
You can't say that.

Speaker 2 (09:49):
I just did. It's a medical name. So for our
little poll today, we asked, are you currently running an
oily or a dry skin situation?

Speaker 1 (09:58):
70% of you, dry skin. I'm a rageful woman. I
always have been. I've always been full of rage.

Speaker 4 (10:09):
And sometimes it comes out, and sometimes that's not very pleasant. Now,
there was a survey done. This is out of America. 22%
of people report feeling rage every day.

Speaker 1 (10:20):
Wow, that's a lot.

Speaker 3 (10:22):
Really?

Speaker 1 (10:24):
Rage every day.

Speaker 4 (10:25):
Only 8% of those, though, said that it negatively impacts
their life.

Speaker 1 (10:30):
Okay. So, like, we feel a bit of rage, but
then we move on, we get over it. That's fine.

Speaker 6 (10:33):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (10:34):
The 8% of people that are like, it's actually ruined
my day or I'm unable to control it or something
like that, that's when it's not good. And then some
science looked into the ways that we can mitigate rage
without doing something stupid like.

Speaker 1 (10:47):
Well, go to one of those rage rooms.

Speaker 4 (10:50):
I still haven't been. And as a rageful woman, I
think I'd really thrive in that environment. I've definitely thrown
a few things, but just sort of.

Speaker 1 (10:56):
You've been demoing your garage, so I feel like that's
probably helped you.

Speaker 4 (11:00):
Um, some things that they looked into exercise can actually backfire,
you know, when they're like, get out there and, you know,
maybe go for a run. Apparently things like heavy lifting
and running or like intense, they call it, um, physiological arousal,
nothing to do with the penis.

Speaker 5 (11:14):
Right.

Speaker 1 (11:14):
It's just like a rousing thing within your body. I
think everything's got to do with the penis if you
try hard enough. And I believe in you.

Speaker 4 (11:21):
It can actually amplify anger rather than dissipate it. And
I've had this before when you're working out at the
gym and you're just almost getting worse and worse and worse.
Doing something that is low arousal helps meditation, yoga, this
kind of stuff.

Speaker 1 (11:34):
I don't have the patience for that.

Speaker 5 (11:35):
Same.

Speaker 1 (11:36):
I get angrier.

Speaker 4 (11:37):
I've been raging in yoga classes because she's not moving
fast enough.

Speaker 1 (11:41):
And I'm bored. Yeah, I know. Same.

Speaker 4 (11:43):
Well, there's just not enough happening. Ruminating obviously doesn't help
replaying events. Distraction works well doing something different, thinking about
happy memories, all that kind of stuff, the obvious things.

Speaker 1 (11:52):
And then they gave a number of examples. It's so
easy to think about happy memories when you're angry, isn't it?
That's the first thing that comes to my mind.

Speaker 4 (11:59):
It's like when I'm having an anxiety attack and then
I just remember to calm down.

Speaker 6 (12:03):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (12:04):
It's just really helpful. And if you don't remember, it's
quite helpful for people to tell you. You'd agree. The
most helpful. Yeah. Have you tried calming down?

Speaker 6 (12:11):
You know what, Vaughn?

Speaker 12 (12:11):
I haven't.

Speaker 1 (12:12):
Thank you so much. Bingo. That's cool.

Speaker 4 (12:14):
So they gave some great ways of releasing anger that's
kind of helpful, not hurtful.

Speaker 3 (12:21):
Okay.

Speaker 5 (12:21):
Okay.

Speaker 4 (12:22):
Stomp around talking in loud gibberish. Now, I had a
therapy appointment last week and she literally said this, grounding,
like stomping.

Speaker 1 (12:29):
If you're ever feeling anxious or anything, stomping.

Speaker 4 (12:31):
And I was like, at least it'll get me laughing
because I look like an idiot.

Speaker 1 (12:34):
I mean, you might wake people up if you're doing
that at home. No one lives underneath me, hopefully. Yeah, true.

Speaker 4 (12:40):
Stomping and talking gibberish, ripping up old newspapers and throwing
them around.

Speaker 1 (12:44):
Now I'm angry, I'm going to do a thing. Yeah,
you're going to clean up your bloody mess. Yeah, you're
going to be angry, you've got to clean up.

Speaker 4 (12:49):
Do an angry dance, put on some loud music and
dance around. Yell a karate yell and jump in the air.

Speaker 11 (12:54):
Hi-ya!

Speaker 1 (12:56):
Like this.

Speaker 4 (12:56):
Pop bubble wrap, create an angry rap or jazz song
and belt it out. Fletch, these are great, you're going
to love these.

Speaker 1 (13:02):
Blow into a paper bag and pop it. Grab a
swim noodle, cut it in half.

Speaker 7 (13:07):
What?

Speaker 1 (13:08):
Cut it in half and then pound things with it.

Speaker 5 (13:11):
Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 (13:11):
Scream into a pillow. And it says in brackets, in
a private setting. In a private, yeah.

Speaker 4 (13:15):
So maybe don't take your pillow onto the thing. And
then this is one that I really, really love.

Speaker 1 (13:19):
Obviously, humour.

Speaker 4 (13:20):
So anything that makes you laugh is going to take
rage away. But this is what I love. Put an
empty chair across from you. Imagine the person you're angry
at is sitting in it and just yell everything you've
ever wanted to say at the chair.

Speaker 1 (13:30):
Get it out. Yeah, get it out.

Speaker 4 (13:32):
It's called classic chest health therapy. is just putting it
all into the chair. It's like writing an angry email
and not sending it. You're going to yell it into
the chair and not actually say it to the person.
And the final one that they gave was make a
mad face in the mirror and draw a picture of
what's making you mad, then stomp on it.

Speaker 1 (13:52):
So there you go.

Speaker 4 (13:53):
If you're feeling a bit rageful. I feel like that
made you more rageful.

Speaker 1 (13:56):
That whole list made me rageful. How bloody silly. It's
very silly.

Speaker 8 (14:01):
The ZM Podcast Network.

Speaker 1 (14:04):
ZM's Fletchpoint and Hayley. From the unmoderated comment section, this
is the top six.

Speaker 2 (14:11):
Well, apparently Kim Jong-un wants North Koreans to have more
state-sanctioned fun.

Speaker 6 (14:16):
Oh.

Speaker 2 (14:18):
There's a new Wonsan Clamor coastal tourist zone in North Korea.
That's been opened. That's the go. There's new coffee bars.
There's water parks.

Speaker 1 (14:27):
There's malls. I would love to go to North Korea.
I would go in a second. It looks incredible. Definitely
go for it. But you're not allowed to like video stuff. No, no, no.
And you're just going to be on a little tour thing, right?

Speaker 6 (14:40):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (14:40):
And like stay with the people and don't say anything
and don't do anything and cover your tattoos.

Speaker 1 (14:46):
And be a good girl.

Speaker 2 (14:46):
So there's been imports of massage equipment. They've surged 40-fold,
treadmill shipments, pianos. We all know how much fun it
is to gather around the piano and sing the old
ragtime tunes.

Speaker 1 (14:59):
Yes.

Speaker 4 (15:02):
The North Korean, like, military music is really intense. Yeah,
it's super intense.

Speaker 2 (15:07):
And they're getting a whole lot of stuff that's not
really traditionally seen as what you would have in a
skint communist state.

Speaker 3 (15:15):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (15:16):
Well, I've got the top six ways you can have
state-sanctioned fun in North Korea.

Speaker 1 (15:20):
Great. For today's top six. Number six on the list is.

Speaker 2 (15:23):
of the ways to have state-sanctioned fun, ride your horse
in the Unfinished Equestrian Club. That's right, a brand-new equestrian
centre is being worked on in North Korea.

Speaker 1 (15:33):
Not finished, but you can, you know... Take your horse there.
Saddle up your horse.

Speaker 2 (15:38):
If you've got a horse, I don't imagine everybody's got
horses for riding, more horses for field-working.

Speaker 1 (15:43):
I'll get a horse.

Speaker 2 (15:44):
And you can gallop through the scaffolding, which has apparently
been up for quite some time.

Speaker 1 (15:47):
Oh, okay.

Speaker 9 (15:48):
Lovely.

Speaker 1 (15:48):
Quite some time. I don't know if they've run out
of money on that one or not. I think they
might have. People probably underestimate how expensive it is to
make an equestrian. People get a horse. They don't know,
do they, how expensive they are. We all love horses.
We all love horses.

Speaker 2 (16:00):
Number five on the list of the top six ways
to get yourself some fun times, state-sanctioned fun times in
North Korea.

Speaker 1 (16:07):
Pick yourself one of the six state-sanctioned haircuts.

Speaker 3 (16:10):
Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 (16:11):
Yeah, if you're a woman, it's up to 28, but, like,
pretty much all the same.

Speaker 4 (16:15):
It's, like, down past the ears, down past a little
bit more, down past a little bit more.

Speaker 1 (16:20):
Always a flat edge. Yeah, flat edge. Always a flat
edge on it. We're not doing a wolf cut. No, no.
No mullets. No wisp. Yeah. But you can get one.
Is bald one of them? I'm going to ask on
behalf of you. Is bald one of the sanctions? It
must be.

Speaker 2 (16:34):
It's not fully shaved. I think it's bald, but, like...
Let the wrap around. Yeah, have your little wrap around.
Number four on the list of the top six ways
to have some state-sanctioned fun in North Korea. Take your
pet that you've just purchased to the pet shop for
a photo op.

Speaker 1 (16:51):
Is that one of them?

Speaker 2 (16:52):
So apparently Kim Jong-un took his daughter to look at
kittens and puppies. And... but there's only a select amount
of breeds available, much like the haircuts.

Speaker 1 (17:03):
Oh, have they got your fancy breeds like Fletcher's?

Speaker 2 (17:05):
Approved cat and dog breeds, and then the approved cat
and dog breed haircuts, I assume.

Speaker 1 (17:11):
Everybody's got an approved haircut. So I wouldn't be allowed
to have my little mongrel over there? No, I don't
think you'd be allowed a mongrel over there.

Speaker 9 (17:17):
Oh, God.

Speaker 2 (17:18):
Number three on the list of the top six ways
to have some state-sanctioned fun in North Korea, have yourself
a beach day at Won Sun Clam, the resort that
was so busy this summer, families had to share twin rooms.

Speaker 1 (17:30):
Yuck. Imagine going, sharing a room with another family that
you don't know. They've overbooked and it's not finished being built,
so they chuck you in the room with a family
and I guess, what, four to a bed?

Speaker 4 (17:42):
And at this beach day, am I allowed to wear
like a little G-string?

Speaker 6 (17:47):
No, no.

Speaker 1 (17:47):
Much like the haircuts and the dogs, it'll be state-sanctioned,
pre-approved togs.

Speaker 3 (17:51):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (17:52):
Togs and dogs, there's a short list, pick one.

Speaker 2 (17:55):
Number two on the list of the top six ways
to have states action fun in North Korea. Before when
I mentioned the things that have been imported, pianos, massage
chairs and treadmills, I left one thing off that I
found very interesting. North Korea has imported over three tons
of bumper cars this year.

Speaker 8 (18:08):
Oh my God, fun.

Speaker 2 (18:10):
So nothing, you know, says a good time like bumping
into your neighbor at low speed under the watchful eye
of the state too aggressively.

Speaker 1 (18:17):
You could be shipped off to a gulag. And number
one on the list of the top six ways to
have some state-sanctioned fun in.

Speaker 2 (18:22):
North Korea, get shipped off to fight Russia's war. For
the economy, of course. Apparently that's a massive way that
they've been getting more discretionary spending.

Speaker 10 (18:31):
Oh, yeah.

Speaker 2 (18:31):
Russia's paying North Korea to fight for them in their
war against Ukraine.

Speaker 1 (18:35):
And drones and, yeah, everything. I didn't know that.

Speaker 2 (18:38):
And also the number one country in the world for
stealing other people's crypto.

Speaker 1 (18:44):
Is it?

Speaker 3 (18:44):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (18:44):
Crypto raids apparently originate from North Korean IP addresses more
than any other country in the world.

Speaker 1 (18:50):
Wild. What if we should go? The three of us.
Go to North Korea, have a lovely little bit of fun. Sanctioned.
We may disappear. Yeah, and you could never see us again.
When we enter the country and say that our job's media. Gone.

Speaker 3 (19:01):
Yeah, yes.

Speaker 1 (19:02):
That's today's top six.

Speaker 8 (19:04):
The Fletchmore and Hayley Big Pod.

Speaker 4 (19:08):
Now, Producer Carwin, I want to talk to you about
this new dating app, even though you put down your
piece of fruit or whatever you've just picked up.

Speaker 1 (19:15):
I was not doing it.

Speaker 11 (19:17):
Brother, I was playing with slime and now I've got
slime on the mic button.

Speaker 4 (19:20):
Oh, I do apologize. I should have given you forewarning
during the song.

Speaker 1 (19:24):
We've got apple and slime out here.

Speaker 4 (19:25):
Well, listen, it's not major because both of you are
committed relationships.

Speaker 1 (19:31):
Yeah, I'd say pretty committed. Committed, that diamond ring means something. Well,
you were looking at wedding venues, weren't you, on the weekend?
Do you know what was crazy?

Speaker 11 (19:37):
A slight sidebar, if I may. I had a DM
from this guy who was sifting, and I said, not interested, like,
got a boyfriend. And he said, can I do monthly
check-ins to.

Speaker 1 (19:46):
See if he's still going? That's nice.

Speaker 3 (19:49):
That's, you know.

Speaker 2 (19:50):
You know as long as he's doing respectfully checking in and.

Speaker 11 (19:53):
So then I said look it's been seven years I'm
locked in but like this is funny haha and then
he said seven year itch.

Speaker 1 (19:59):
What what Seven years don't mean a thing. Do 14,
do 20. Oh, yeah, 14. Don't mean shit. I mean,
I admire this guy's checking on a monthly.

Speaker 11 (20:07):
Yeah, I said, seven years, I'm pretty locked in. And
he said, oh, that's throwing me a bit.

Speaker 1 (20:14):
He's like, damn, she is into him.

Speaker 11 (20:16):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (20:17):
She didn't receive different DMs from men's in the morning,
but mine was slightly different. So there's a new dating app.
So I know that you're not going to download it, but,
you know.

Speaker 1 (20:26):
Back pocket, yeah. Sometimes it's good to have them in
a folder. Yeah, totally. On the phone, you know what
I mean? It's called Read Me. It's launched.

Speaker 4 (20:34):
It's specifically built for book lovers, matching people based on
their shared reading tastes rather than typical profile lines like,
you know, Look at my fish. So it's like, it's
the team that do, now, stay with me, boys. It's
called CoStar. They also did a dating app. Do you
know about this one? That based on astrology and star

(20:54):
mapping and that kind of stuff. And CoStar used to
pop up in notifications and be like, hey, babe, you're
not going to have a good day.

Speaker 1 (21:01):
Don't bother. Yeah, you're not going to bother.

Speaker 3 (21:03):
Really?

Speaker 1 (21:04):
He is not within your rising.

Speaker 4 (21:07):
So this was announced this week on Twitter or X
or whatever you want to call it these days. And
they say it's the idea that someone's taste in books
reveals more about their true spirit than forced dating at
bios of like, you know, do bloody high rocks, more
on that later, or whatever. And they said they've been
working on this for years and years and years. And
since like, you know, people are putting their faith in

(21:29):
other things like bloody eclipse months, expiry dates or star
signs or anything, they're saying books. Do you think, if
you cast your mind back to the single Carwin that
we know and love, as a book lover at Carwin Reigns,
and Fletch, you can partake as well at Fletch Listen.

Speaker 1 (21:46):
Yes, yeah. That someone's book taste is important to you?

Speaker 7 (21:50):
Yeah, I mean, look, my fiancé doesn't really read at all,
so that's... Whoa! But I do think so.

Speaker 1 (21:57):
He can read, though. He can read. He has read. Okay, good. Yeah.

Speaker 7 (22:03):
But yes, because if you're reading some... dark, dirty stuff,
then I'll be like, maybe you're for me.

Speaker 6 (22:09):
Wow.

Speaker 4 (22:10):
That went a different direction. Yeah, yeah, if they were
a little bit more over-minded to it.

Speaker 7 (22:14):
But if they were like, oh, I just love a
self-help book, like The Secret's my favourite, I'd be like.

Speaker 1 (22:19):
Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, right.

Speaker 4 (22:21):
Or if they were just reading sort of like trash
or something kind of a bit.

Speaker 1 (22:25):
Or like Harry Potter, ugh.

Speaker 3 (22:27):
Ooh, aye.

Speaker 1 (22:28):
Yeah. Excuse you, that's a wonderful series. We don't have
to read as a child. We can... Oh, no, there's dips,
there's dips to it. Oh, no, no, no, no. If
you can celebrate the author, you know. No, no, no,
we don't celebrate that author.

Speaker 3 (22:39):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (22:39):
I find it really interesting that your fiancé doesn't read
and you're such an avid reader.

Speaker 1 (22:43):
Do you try to buy him books? Yeah, he's bought
a couple.

Speaker 7 (22:47):
He does actually, to me, feel like a Stephen King
or like a little thriller novel, but he just doesn't,
it's not his go-to relaxation.

Speaker 1 (22:53):
You know, like it is for me. Right, right, right, right.

Speaker 6 (22:55):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (22:55):
I wonder like where dating apps will keep going in
the future because we've reinvented them so many times, right?
There's like Tinder, the normal ones. And then there's your
hookup apps. And then we're like specifically, but she starts.
And this one, but you've got 30 seconds. And now
it's specific. Like, is there going to be a dating
app for every hobby? Like a dating app for metalheads
and be like.

Speaker 1 (23:16):
See you in the pits. Dating app for chicks wanting
to date magicians. Yeah, hot stuff, hot stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Do you think there'll be many people on that app?
It's like five people.

Speaker 5 (23:25):
Me?

Speaker 1 (23:26):
Yeah, it's okay.

Speaker 4 (23:27):
Shannon and a bunch of men doing monthly check-ins.

Speaker 2 (23:34):
It was a High Rocks event in Beijing on September 12th,
so three days ago, where Australian athlete Joanna Wetzrich, the
reigning High Rocks world record holder, I will say.

Speaker 1 (23:45):
Oh, okay. Incredible.

Speaker 2 (23:46):
Suffered what is being described by professionals as severe bowel
incontinence partway through the race.

Speaker 1 (23:53):
And poopy pants. Liquid poopy pants. She shit herself. She
shit her pants.

Speaker 2 (23:58):
And if you watch the video, a lot of them
are getting taken down now because they are pretty graphic.

Speaker 1 (24:03):
I can't escape it.

Speaker 3 (24:04):
But.

Speaker 1 (24:06):
You think, oh, that's terrible. There's a bit.

Speaker 2 (24:07):
And then there's a secondary explosion, sort of the plane
hit the second tower, if you will. And it just
streams down her legs.

Speaker 1 (24:17):
She doesn't stop.

Speaker 2 (24:18):
She doesn't stop. And then she kind of loops back around. And,
you know, no disrespect to High Rocks people. You're annoying
to listen to, but you're also amazing athletes.

Speaker 6 (24:27):
For sure.

Speaker 1 (24:28):
And she just does not stop. She kind of crawls
back through her own diarrhea. She wins, right? And then wins. Yes, correct. Insane.
With a time of about an hour. She's a world champion. Insane.

Speaker 3 (24:40):
Now.

Speaker 1 (24:41):
No doubt she's an incredible athlete. Absolutely. Full stop. Admiration.

Speaker 3 (24:46):
Yup.

Speaker 1 (24:47):
Now. New paragraph. If this was a typewriter, ding, ding.
A new paragraph.

Speaker 2 (24:58):
I tried to do the Dolly Parton thing from nine
to five, but I don't have acrylics. That didn't sound
as much like a typewriter.

Speaker 1 (25:03):
New paragraph. Everybody else who had to crawl through a post,
not as impressed.

Speaker 9 (25:08):
No.

Speaker 2 (25:09):
Concerning the hygiene, competitors came in touch with the same mats,
sled handles, track surfaces that her poopy, poopy, poopy hands
and poopy, poopy legs had been on.

Speaker 1 (25:19):
So now it's kind of rewriting the rule books of
IROX because they're just like, we had no rule book rules.
there's no rules to do what to do when someone
shits themselves in high rocks. Cause if you're running a
marathon and you shit yourself, like everyone's in shoes, the
purse is in your own shoes. There might be some
on the ground, but you're running it, but you're not

(25:39):
on those porous absorbent mats. With your bare hands.

Speaker 4 (25:42):
Cause they're doing like, they're like standing and then they're
doing press ups and burpees and your hands are now
in it.

Speaker 1 (25:47):
And then you, yeah, you're grabbing sleds and you're grabbing ski.
Not to mention these are multi-day events.

Speaker 10 (25:54):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (25:54):
So different. I think, Solo females, solo males, then there's
like mixed teams, males, you know, more, whatever, however they
wrap it up. So this was also like there was
competition the next day.

Speaker 2 (26:07):
So they said we did, after the races wrapped up,
replace the course carpeting.

Speaker 1 (26:13):
So who's paying for that? And the second deep clean
of other surfaces. Do you know, so did you see
her post? Which she took down.

Speaker 4 (26:20):
So it's been taken down, but she posted on Instagram saying,
go hard or go home, a win is a win.

Speaker 1 (26:26):
And she's in a hospital bed on an IV drip.

Speaker 4 (26:28):
Yeah, yeah, because how did your shit get so liquid?

Speaker 1 (26:33):
I've had diarrhea before, but even then it's gone. peas
in it. It's got... Fluff. It's got some... I don't know.
After I had... When we came back from Bali and
I had the Bali belly, I could have had a her.
But no, but that looks like colonoscopy prep. It does.
Liquid shit.

Speaker 9 (26:49):
It does.

Speaker 1 (26:50):
But you think about it, she's wearing like a bike pant.
It would have sieved out all the... True. That's just
the liquid that's come out. That's just the liquid that's
come out. Okay, people are eating breakfast. Yeah, we do
it for us. Sorry if you're enjoying your Coco Pops.

Speaker 4 (27:02):
So do you know, so China, this is in China,
I don't know if every high rock's each country has
its own rules, but they did have a rule against
spitting and snot rockets.

Speaker 1 (27:11):
Nose rockets, yeah, but... Oh, okay. But not shitting yourself.

Speaker 2 (27:14):
So, High Rocks China has issued a statement and said
there's this huge gap. We've formally submitted a proposal to
High Rocks that new rules cover things like course management,
on-site intervention should.

Speaker 1 (27:24):
You know, someone should themselves... Event suspension, so being able
to like pause it and being like, hold on, like
a bit of a red flag in the racing sort
of a situation. Everybody hold where you are. I think
you've just got to pull out if you need to
go to the toilet. It's just bad timing. Suck it up.
Go to the next event. It's not like the Olympics.

Speaker 4 (27:40):
I love the idea of, you know, the judges are
all there making sure that everything's been done properly.

Speaker 1 (27:45):
Yeah. Of her sort of doing the walking lunges and
they're going... Hi, Hon. We're going to get you to stop.
We're going to get you to stop. Hi, darling. Do
you know, if I may speak honestly. Yeah, absolutely. It's
all we do on the show.

Speaker 2 (27:57):
This may lower some people's, you know, high, high opinion
of me. But if you've ever been, like, running or
at the gym, you'll rip a fart. I'll rip some farts.
You know, the body starts to protest again. There might
be a little something.

Speaker 1 (28:09):
And just the itch or the rash that develops so
quickly afterwards.

Speaker 3 (28:13):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (28:14):
Totally. Let alone having bike shorts full of shit. I've
weed myself slightly on a run. And the rub. And
then even then with a slight added moisture. Yeah. It's
too much. She must have had such a rash. Someone
asked this question about the Olympics. So there's no specific
rule in the Olympic rule book that specifically mentions or

(28:35):
disqualifies an athlete if they lose control of their bowels.
Because marathon runners do it sometimes. They do it all
the time. But there are disqualifications if there are like
health and safety risks and stuff as well.

Speaker 5 (28:48):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (28:49):
And unsportsmanlike conduct. So you could say that's unsportsmanlike to...
Make other people following you go through your... Exactly. So,
you know, there are like, you know, a few things there.
But nothing officially in the rule book either for the Olympics.
Because like you say, it happens.

Speaker 4 (29:03):
Because sometimes weightlifters will wee themselves if they're doing a
heavy deadlift because of the.

Speaker 1 (29:07):
The strain.

Speaker 9 (29:08):
Right.

Speaker 1 (29:09):
Oh, yeah, I saw one of those the other day.
The girls do it quite often.

Speaker 3 (29:13):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (29:15):
I think, I mean, I really would love to be
a super fit, super like, you know what I mean,
jacked person, a great athlete, but I draw the line
at loss of bowel. That's just where, when I'm in
a pub pass and I've shat myself, that's my line.

Speaker 8 (29:31):
Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughan and Hayley.

Speaker 4 (29:34):
Now I want to know, when were you underqualified for
the job you got? Maybe you sold yourself a little
high and then you got there and you went, oh, yeah,
I don't know how to do this.

Speaker 1 (29:45):
I don't know how to work this machine or this
program or do this thing. I might have lied. And
now that has come to a head. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (29:52):
I asked this question because I was reading a great
article that was about students often after they graduate from
university consider themselves too underqualified for jobs so they don't
apply for them. And then they're missing out on a
whole bunch of work that if they applied for it,
they might get it and move a.

Speaker 1 (30:08):
Bit quicker ahead. Yeah, because newsflash, you're just out of uni,
you're cheap. You're cheap. So companies want you.

Speaker 4 (30:14):
Totally, and I think people are often maybe a little
too humble and think, oh, you know, I'm not good
enough yet.

Speaker 1 (30:20):
I'll stay within this realm. I've always been the opposite.
You've got to back yourself and fake it till you
make it. Fake it till you make it.

Speaker 4 (30:25):
So they say turn your interview prep into a study plan,
like prep for that thing.

Speaker 1 (30:29):
Sell yourself.

Speaker 4 (30:31):
Practice talking about what you do know, not what you
don't know. Just basically put yourself out there and make
interview prep this part of life. I don't know, getting
out there and getting something bigger than maybe you think
you're capable of. But when you get there, you are
going to need to know how to do the job.
I want to hear from our listeners when you got

(30:52):
there and you maybe realized I'm a bit underqualified.

Speaker 1 (30:57):
Even maybe you were working somewhere and someone came up
to you and they're like, actually, I kind of lied
in my interview. I don't know how to, can you
help me? Can you help me?

Speaker 6 (31:04):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (31:04):
Can you tell me how to do this? Because I
don't know. Is Excel an app? Yeah. I can't find
the tail. What does it sell?

Speaker 3 (31:10):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (31:10):
What is excelling? Because I don't have it. How much
is that?

Speaker 2 (31:14):
I believe everybody should approach job interviews with the confidence
of a white man.

Speaker 1 (31:19):
Totally.

Speaker 2 (31:20):
I want everybody, if you're going for a job interview,
just think, how would I handle this if I was
an overconfident white guy?

Speaker 1 (31:25):
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Roll in there. Arrogant. Yeah. White male arrogance.
Do it.

Speaker 4 (31:30):
Also, like a white male politician. They ask you a
question you don't know how to answer.

Speaker 1 (31:34):
Duck and weave, baby. Duck and weave. You don't answer
that question. Answer their question with a question. Go, ask
me a question.

Speaker 4 (31:41):
Now, in the event of a high-stress period, Vaughan, are
you very good at handling that? What would you do, say,
if the books weren't balancing? What I want to ask
you is why aren't the books balanced?

Speaker 1 (31:55):
This sounds like a problem further up the supply chain,
and I'm not going to be picking up other people's problems.
I've got my own problems to deal with. You sound difficult.
You sound like a problem. I'd be looking more into
why the books aren't balanced as really. Okay, so we
want you to message in. Call us, 0800-DARLS-AT-HEM, 9696. We
ask on Instagram. Yep. Someone said, I was a nanny

(32:16):
in London.

Speaker 2 (32:17):
Never worked with little kids before and never will again.
Scarred from that job.

Speaker 1 (32:22):
I bet. Did bookkeeping for a small business for two years.
I still couldn't tell you what and how GST actually works.
I don't know. You give it to me. I'll give
it to you. I'll give it back. I charge you
for it, but then I get it, but then I've
got to hold on to that, and then you take it,
but give it back to me later. It's bizarre, isn't it? Yeah.
This is worrying.

Speaker 2 (32:41):
I did finance for the City Rail Link for six months.
I'm a words person, not a numbers one.

Speaker 1 (32:46):
Oh, God. Do you think that's why it blew out?
It might have blown out. I mean, it looks beautiful. God,
it's nice, isn't it? It's beautiful. It's nice.

Speaker 2 (32:53):
My brother got a job as a chef in the UK.
He said he'd worked in a kitchen in New Zealand.
He had worked for Hell Pizza. As a delivery driver.

Speaker 3 (33:02):
Oh, wow.

Speaker 1 (33:03):
Never actually in the kitchen.

Speaker 9 (33:04):
As a chef.

Speaker 1 (33:06):
Never in the kitchen. Wow. I'm sorry, but you can't
turn up to work. You're not going to know what
to do. I love this. Bit of yes, chef. Yep.
Bit of oil on the hot bits. Yeah. You've seen
the beer. That's enough. Yeah. Behind.

Speaker 12 (33:20):
Yep.

Speaker 1 (33:20):
Okay. 0800 dials at MSN number. Text in 9696.

Speaker 4 (33:24):
When were you not quite qualified for the job you got?

Speaker 1 (33:28):
Janice. Good morning. When were you underqualified for the job?

Speaker 3 (33:35):
Well, back in 1990, I was living in London and
I just chucked in a hairdressing job that I wasn't
happy with.

Speaker 5 (33:44):
Yep.

Speaker 3 (33:45):
And ended up in an agency and got a job
at a radio station for the BBC.

Speaker 1 (33:51):
Oh, wow. What were you doing for the BBC? Reading
the news?

Speaker 3 (33:55):
No, I was a receptionist to begin with, which was
cool because of all the famous people walking in my
door every day.

Speaker 1 (34:01):
Who were some of the famous people you saw?

Speaker 3 (34:04):
Some of the famous people. Well, I think the first
day I was there, I sat on the loo next
to Suzanne Vega. That was pretty cool.

Speaker 1 (34:13):
The singer?

Speaker 3 (34:14):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (34:15):
Well, you sat on the loo next to her, so
you were doing that thing where you tried to pee quietly?

Speaker 11 (34:20):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (34:21):
Right, right, right. Did you ever see George Michael?

Speaker 3 (34:24):
Um, no, but Duran Duran came in while I was there. Oh, wow.

Speaker 1 (34:28):
That's incredible.

Speaker 3 (34:29):
Fans and everything hovering around.

Speaker 1 (34:31):
Who's who in the 80s and 90s? Yeah.

Speaker 3 (34:34):
Wow.

Speaker 4 (34:34):
And did anyone ever catch you out being like, You're
terrible at this? How did you get this job?

Speaker 3 (34:40):
No, well, I actually got promoted to working on a
radio program. Oh, wow.

Speaker 11 (34:44):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (34:44):
See, getting a job on radio is so easy, eh? Yeah,
it was really easy. Yeah, you just walk in. Yeah, easy.
I mean, Hayley just walked in, didn't she? I just
came in and was like, yo, got one of them
highfalutin radio jobs? Didn't study it at all? Nah, not
at all. Janice, thank you. Let's go to Kayleigh. Kayleigh,
when were you underqualified for the job?

Speaker 12 (35:05):
Oh, well, I have to take you back a few
years now.

Speaker 1 (35:07):
That's all right. We just came back from 1990.

Speaker 10 (35:12):
Not quite ever.

Speaker 12 (35:13):
I was a 22-year-old freshly graduated baby teacher. I'd done
my whole undergraduate in graphic design, so I was on
a trajectory to be the best art teacher ever. But unfortunately,
there were no art teacher jobs. So good old Kiwi,
you know, upbringing in a remote part of New Zealand,
spent a lot of time in the shed with my dad.

(35:35):
I was like, I'll apply for the only job that's available,
the woodwork job, and I'll just wing it.

Speaker 1 (35:40):
Yeah, mate. Oh my God, excellent. And did you get it?
I did.

Speaker 12 (35:45):
I got the job.

Speaker 1 (35:46):
Woodworking's amazing. And how long did you last being the
woodwork teacher?

Speaker 4 (35:51):
Well, I definitely could.

Speaker 12 (35:53):
Have lasted longer. I actually low-key loved the job, but
I really, really, really did want to end up in art.

Speaker 1 (36:00):
Yeah, right. Right, right.

Speaker 12 (36:02):
I shifted after a year, but it was at Titor College,
represent the heart.

Speaker 11 (36:06):
Oh, my God.

Speaker 12 (36:06):
It was the easiest school to work at, but we
loved it.

Speaker 1 (36:09):
Yeah, Titor College, notorious. Oh, really?

Speaker 6 (36:13):
Oh, yeah, man.

Speaker 1 (36:13):
Notorious. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, really? We had Fraser.
We had Hamilton. We had Fraser High.

Speaker 3 (36:18):
Yeah, right.

Speaker 1 (36:18):
That was out of notorious. Right, right.

Speaker 12 (36:21):
I had my little boys being like, Miss, that is
not how you use a crowbar. Let me show you
how to do it.

Speaker 1 (36:25):
Excuse me. They were showing you.

Speaker 2 (36:28):
Yeah, you're like, excuse me, don't mansplain this subject I'm teaching.

Speaker 1 (36:31):
I'm the woodwork teacher. Did you do any dovetail joints?
Do you have dovetail joints?

Speaker 12 (36:35):
Yeah, I did.

Speaker 1 (36:36):
I did.

Speaker 12 (36:37):
We did BCITO units, which is like the building industry
trade unit. So I was teaching level two and three
industry trade units.

Speaker 1 (36:46):
No wonder the houses built in this country are all buggered. Yeah,
they were taught by Miss Kayleigh. Miss Kayleigh just kind
of needed a job. I love this, Kayleigh. That's so funny.
Good on you. Thank you so much. Go to some messages.
No shortage of them.

Speaker 2 (37:00):
Someone said, I recently method acted as an overconfident white
male in an interview and now I'm earning six figures.
So I can say Vaughan's technique of just acting like
a white male in the interview works a treat.

Speaker 4 (37:10):
Just get it, learn it on the job.

Speaker 2 (37:13):
Not me, but a senior where I currently work doesn't
have a degree. Not an issue, but we do make
medicine in a lab.

Speaker 1 (37:18):
One of those ones you kind of expect somebody to.

Speaker 11 (37:20):
Oh, wow.

Speaker 1 (37:21):
How'd they get into that? Turned up one day. Wrong door,
I guess.

Speaker 12 (37:25):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (37:27):
We've got a couple of... Now, this person says chiefs,
but I think they mean chefs. Okay.

Speaker 2 (37:32):
I've got a couple of chefs in my company that
are far from qualified for their jobs, but.

Speaker 1 (37:35):
Boy, do they believe in themselves. Yeah, we love that.
That's all it takes. Yeah. A little bit of self-belief.

Speaker 4 (37:40):
Also, there's more texts from people dobbing in their bosses
for being like, oh, my boss is clueless.

Speaker 1 (37:45):
Yes. But that's most... Bosses, right? Yeah, totally. You're just
kind of like... My boss lied to get the position.
He has no idea what he's doing. He's bloody useless.
He just delegates to everybody else and they make him
look good.

Speaker 4 (37:58):
Oh, someone's texting saying, once I wound up working on
the radio despite only having an acting degree.

Speaker 1 (38:02):
Oh, wait, that wasn't me. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
Good burn. That's good burn. Parenthood. It's all just talking,
isn't it? It's all just talk, talk, talk. Parenthood. God,
I'm so underqualified for this job I undertook 14 years ago.
I'm still just winging it. Oh, God, every parent's making
it up.

Speaker 11 (38:18):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (38:19):
I applied to be a flight centre travel agent. I
was 24.

Speaker 2 (38:22):
I'd never left the country or been on a plane.

Speaker 1 (38:24):
But, hey, I faked it till I made it. Yeah, yeah.
Couples come in and would love to go to Europe.
She's like, I loved it. It's beautiful. You must simply
go to Rome, man. Yeah, yeah. And Paris is just
sort of beautiful. So we'll get you there. 20 years
driving truck and trailers without a trailer license. Don't they
pull them over and check this stuff?

Speaker 2 (38:45):
Yeah, got caught by a cop. Took a break to
raise some kids. Started driving buses. You don't need trailers
for them, of course.

Speaker 1 (38:52):
Fair, yeah, fair.

Speaker 2 (38:54):
Test drove with a company instructor, same cop, yep, had
the right licence, so been, you know, been sorted ever since.

Speaker 1 (38:59):
Oh, been on the straight and narrow ever since.

Speaker 2 (39:01):
My granddad was a British Air Force pilot, notoriously a
bit badly behaved in the job, then he applied for
a job at the Prisoner of War camp managing it,
got that, grossly underqualified, lasted two months until the higher
powers realised he was just winging it with the Prisoners
of War.

Speaker 1 (39:13):
Sorry.

Speaker 4 (39:17):
They just let some willy-nilly mate come in and manage
the prisoner of war camp.

Speaker 1 (39:23):
And then went, he's not very good at this. He's
just been winging it. And he's been flying planes. That's wild.
I went on a press trip. for the new Porsche.
Only had my learner's driver's license at the time. Drove them.
And everyone was like, wow, you did really well. I
was like, yep, shitting myself the entire time. Oh, my God.

(39:44):
I've had my full license for, like, years. I wouldn't
drive a Porsche. I wouldn't even know how to do it.
How do you get an invite to a Porsche junket? Well,
how else are you going to get a Thrasher Porsche?
I'm never even going to get to drive a Porsche.
I wouldn't know how to do it. I'd be like.
In Florence. Oh, my God.

Speaker 2 (39:58):
Are we handling the situation like an overconfident white male?

Speaker 1 (40:01):
Play ZM. Fletch for me.

Speaker 3 (40:03):
Hayley.

Speaker 1 (40:04):
Okay, this is a post that is on my apartment
building Facebook page.

Speaker 4 (40:08):
What other stuff in general goes there? Anyone got a blah, blah, blah?

Speaker 1 (40:14):
Like roadworks notices, like, oh, it might be noisy tonight.
There's some roadworks. What else have we got? Any parties? No, sometimes, yeah,
sometimes people might have a party and they say, there's
like a, do a resident survey, like if you live
in the city of Auckland, do a survey there.

Speaker 7 (40:31):
Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 (40:31):
If you want more parks and stuff. Everybody wants more parks.
Who's left the single bed down in the storage? Oh
my God, that's pretty much like 90% of the posts are,
please don't dump shit in the rubbish room. Because I've
seen your storage a little bit. I was blown away. Yeah.
Everyone's got their lives. From an anonymous member. Oh, anonymous.

(40:52):
You know, in a Facebook group, you can post anonymously.
By the way, can the admins see who's actually posting?

Speaker 7 (40:58):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (40:59):
Yeah. Can they? Because I was going to reply to
this post. Anonymously. Anonymously. But it says that whoever's the
admin can see your name. So it's not anonymous. Because
we've got our FVH International podcast family.

Speaker 6 (41:11):
Yes.

Speaker 2 (41:11):
And occasionally someone will chuck an anonymous post on there.
And as one of the administrators, I can see. I
approve posts. I can see who's posted it.

Speaker 1 (41:19):
Oh, okay. Right. Sometimes I think of your doody little poof.
So this is the post. Does anyone else always hear
the girl yelling at night? Level three, maybe. Yelling at night.

Speaker 3 (41:33):
What?

Speaker 1 (41:33):
Yelling at night. What is that? And there's no comments
on it. Say that again. Read it again. Does anyone
else always hear the girl yelling at night? Girl always
yelling ghost. I was going to say, you've got to
haunt us. Okay, so there's only one comment, and I
was expecting this would maybe pop off. No, say what

(41:53):
you wanted to comment. Yelling in pleasure or yelling in pain. Well, yeah,
I was going to say, can you please describe the yelling? Like,
is it, you know, because the only comment is, if
you think it's serious, call the police. Better to be overcautious.

Speaker 3 (42:05):
Yes, yes, yes.

Speaker 1 (42:05):
Which is absolutely fair. Correct. But it sounds like this
is an ongoing issue.

Speaker 3 (42:09):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (42:09):
But it does sound like it would be pleasurable.

Speaker 9 (42:12):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (42:12):
But maybe it doesn't sound pleasurable.

Speaker 4 (42:14):
Because, like, ah!

Speaker 1 (42:15):
Any comments of other people hearing it? No, nobody. I
thought it would pop off, but nobody's, nobody's, I really,
and I've never heard it because I go to bed
at like quarter to eight, eight o'clock.

Speaker 3 (42:24):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (42:25):
So if there's any late night noises, pleasurable or non-pleasurable,
I'm not hearing any of them. You don't even hear them.
I don't hear it. Okay. Brilliant. I can't believe more
people haven't commented. I know. I was really hoping it
was going to pop off. We need to get to
the bottom of this. Do we need to?

Speaker 4 (42:43):
On the weekend, we're going to have a little drinky-poos.
Shall we go to level three?

Speaker 1 (42:48):
To hear the yelling. I don't know if we can
just be loitering around. How late at night is the yelling?
There's so many questions. I've got so many questions and
they're not answered.

Speaker 6 (42:57):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (42:58):
Also, if you're a member of this Facebook page and
that's you, like, are you now embarrassed that you're so loud?
That you're loud. That your neighbours are hearing you? Yeah.
I mean, this is apartment living. The walls are thin,
you know. Yeah, well, never forget the Mr. Brightside when
they said, turn it down.

Speaker 11 (43:14):
I know.

Speaker 1 (43:14):
He said it is a song that will last the
test of time. They had video out the window of Mr.
Brightside and us singing. That's right. Yeah, well, that's on you.

Speaker 4 (43:23):
Oh, no, a further investigation needed.

Speaker 1 (43:26):
Well, I'll update you if anything happens. Yes, please, if
there's anything. Yeah, I mean, it doesn't sound, hopefully it's
not bad. It sounds like it would be more on
the good side. Yeah, we're laughing now until it's someone,
an excruciating pain. Shannon's saying her apartment doesn't have a
Facebook group. Thank Christ.

Speaker 11 (43:42):
No, I would love one because there are times where
stuff is going down. And, you know, we've spoken on
the podcast, I think it was podcast exclusive, about my
neighbours who have gone a bit off the rails and
they've written some stuff on their front door. I'd love
to investigate that.

Speaker 1 (43:56):
Further with my neighbours. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's right.

Speaker 11 (43:58):
I did have a neighbour knock on our door recently
and ask if they could go through my apartment on
my balcony and climb.

Speaker 1 (44:03):
Across to their apartment. Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
And I'm a lot of floors up and we said no.
I would let them. No, they're casing the joint, babe.
That's casing the joint. No, I just don't want someone's
death sort of to even be remotely connected to me. Yeah,
it was just like a very dodgy kind of situation.
A Facebook group would be lovely. How big's the gap
between your balcony and their balcony?

Speaker 11 (44:24):
There's metal bars, so you would have to go across.

Speaker 1 (44:27):
You'd have to go across the balcony.

Speaker 11 (44:29):
And I'm not going to say the number up I am,
but it's like a lot, a lot.

Speaker 1 (44:32):
It's death. It's death up. It's a death fall. I'm
death stories tall. But also something... that would happen at
Shannon's apartment building. You know, like classic. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 8 (44:43):

Speaker 4 (44:45):
We want to know right now, when did you book
for the wrong day? Maybe it was a holiday or
an adventure or an activity you had planned or an appointment.
Because yesterday was, it marked number three in the space
of a week. When I turned up to the dentist
and I said, Hayley Sproul, 12.15.

Speaker 1 (45:00):
She goes, no. Isn't it weird when you do turn
up and you say like 12.15 and they're like, no.
And they look through and they're like, oh, no, here
you are. It's like, what 12.15 were you looking at?

Speaker 5 (45:12):
A.M.

Speaker 4 (45:13):
A.M.? No one's booked at a midnight, baby. That's been
in my calendar for ages. Hygienist appointments, hard to get
at my dentist, right?

Speaker 1 (45:19):
Always booked up. But also my dentist and so many
places for appointments will text you like 18 times. They
did and I said yes.

Speaker 4 (45:30):
Because when I saw it come up saying like, this
is your reminder, I was like, yeah, I know it's
in the calendar, yes. But it's like, this is your
reminder for your appointment on, Tuesday the 15th of September,
not yesterday, Monday the 14th of September.

Speaker 1 (45:41):
And this is the third time you've done this. Yes,
because I.

Speaker 4 (45:44):
Went to the movies on Sunday and my ticket was
for Saturday.

Speaker 11 (45:47):
Yep.

Speaker 4 (45:48):
Went to the dentist yesterday and the appointment is today.
And I booked flights home for a trip and I
booked coming home a day later than I actually need
to be because otherwise I won't be at work.

Speaker 1 (46:02):
So what.

Speaker 4 (46:04):
oh, Hayley, I'm tired of this brain.

Speaker 1 (46:07):
But I want to know when you've done this. Make
me feel a little bit better.

Speaker 4 (46:09):
Because that's three in one week.

Speaker 1 (46:11):
Well, I was going to say, at least you didn't
turn up to the airport and realise, or you weren't
overseas and then realised you'd got that wrong flight. Nah,
I just wouldn't come to work. Yeah, I guess you just...
I just would have taken a sick day and you're like,
weren't you? And I'd be like, yeah. I'd have been like, oh,
they changed my flight last minute. Oh, no, delayed. Delayed, delayed.
Can't Google that. Can't Google that, can you? Well, you
literally can. No, you can't. You can't now.

Speaker 6 (46:32):
Oh, no.

Speaker 1 (46:33):
Marty would never. Why would he bother? He'd be like,
she's sick. Flight was delayed. Flight was cancelled. So, I mean, yeah,
this would happen to a lot of people. And, I mean,
you're lucky it's just a dentist appointment. And you were early.
At least you weren't the next day. Yes, I know,
and I missed it.

Speaker 3 (46:47):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (46:47):
Because then at some places, if you miss it, you've
got to pay, baby.

Speaker 1 (46:50):
Yeah, they charge you. Someone said, welcome to perimenopause and
welcome to ADHD, both of which are true. That's fine,
I understand. Doesn't make it any easier.

Speaker 10 (46:57):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (46:58):
Because you are very organised. This is very surprising for you.

Speaker 4 (47:02):
My calendar is very toy. I just put it in
the calendar on the wrong day.

Speaker 2 (47:06):
It's not an Omega-3 or Omega-6 issue. Is it like
a memory thing? Because, you know, my memory's terrible.

Speaker 1 (47:11):
Your memory's terrible. I take the fish oil tablets, but
I don't like the burp taste afterwards. No, just have salmon.
It's so much better for you. Salmon? Yeah. It's a
whole rigmarole with cooking it, though. No, it's not. Eight
minutes in the air fryer. Eight minutes in the air fryer. Delicious.
See how it's helping my brain? You wait until fact
of the day that it's coming up soon. Really? What's
happening there? We've got a great sushi of the day,

(47:32):
but stay tuned. So he had forgotten sushi of the
day because he hasn't had enough Omega 3s. He'd forgotten
he has to go back to the day. I can't
do the tablets because of the burps afterwards. I know,
I know.

Speaker 3 (47:41):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (47:42):
Okay, so 0800 DARS at him. We want to take
your calls now. Text through 9696.

Speaker 4 (47:47):
When did you book for the wrong day? Because I've
done it three times in one week. But I'm not
the only one.

Speaker 1 (47:53):
So many messages and calls. Let's go to Steph. Steph.
What did you book early or the wrong day?

Speaker 10 (48:01):
Well, it was actually kind of a bit more than
what I messaged in, but I booked a trip to
Canada and booked it a little bit too long for
the first bit, a week longer than I was supposed to.

Speaker 1 (48:12):
A whole week, yep.

Speaker 10 (48:14):
And I had to change it back a week and
then book my time off. Then I had to go
back and rebook an extra two days off work because I.

Speaker 3 (48:22):
Forgot the time zone.

Speaker 10 (48:23):
I left Canada on the 16th and didn't arrive until
the 18th.

Speaker 1 (48:27):
Yeah. But then going over, you land on the same day.
It's magic.

Speaker 4 (48:32):
But then you've got to book the flight for the
day in the time zone.

Speaker 1 (48:36):
I know. To get back to a day.

Speaker 10 (48:38):
Two days coming back.

Speaker 11 (48:39):
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (48:40):
It's so confusing. I mean, it literally says that when
you book it. No, it literally doesn't sometimes. Like, it
literally says what day and time you arrive.

Speaker 2 (48:49):
In the country.

Speaker 1 (48:49):
Sometimes you're like, am I going to the future? I
was just excited to get work off.

Speaker 6 (48:52):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (48:53):
Yeah, fair enough. Thank you. Let's go to Kyra. Kyra,
what did you book for the wrong day?

Speaker 6 (49:00):
So me and my uni students were all about to
travel back down to Dunedin for uni. Went through security,
did all of that jazz. Everyone went to go scan
their flights, and I actually was the only one who
booked for the next day, and everyone was booked on
that flight.

Speaker 9 (49:17):
Oh, shame.

Speaker 1 (49:18):
Gosh. Shame. better.

Speaker 6 (49:22):
I obviously head back home and then I don't get
any messages from the girls that they'd landed and I
was like, what's going on? Has the plane gone down?

Speaker 12 (49:28):
Like, I was stressing.

Speaker 6 (49:29):
Well, they didn't land and ended up back in Wellington anyway. Oh, weather.

Speaker 1 (49:35):
Weather turnaround. Kind of perfect. Were they on your flight
the next day?

Speaker 6 (49:41):
No, I ended up getting back to Dunedin before they did.

Speaker 1 (49:44):
Good stuff. Yeah, because all the flights were full. Amazing.
That's actually funny. Kyra, thank you. Let's go to Sarah. Sarah,
what did you book early?

Speaker 10 (49:51):
Well, I didn't book.

Speaker 12 (49:53):
My six-year-old daughter had dressed up at school, so we
got all dressed up as Elsa, glitter.

Speaker 1 (49:58):
In the hair, the whole shebang. Oh, no.

Speaker 10 (50:00):
We were driving to school, and I was like, why
is that child in school uniform?

Speaker 1 (50:03):
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Speaker 7 (50:05):
And I was like.

Speaker 1 (50:06):
Oh, shit.

Speaker 10 (50:07):
Well, I mean, sorry.

Speaker 1 (50:07):
I was like, oh, no. Why are they in uniform?

Speaker 5 (50:10):
And we arrived at school, and we were a day early.

Speaker 12 (50:12):
No.

Speaker 1 (50:13):
So what?

Speaker 2 (50:13):
Did you just get two days as Elsa, or did
you take her home and get her changed?

Speaker 10 (50:18):
No, she went in all very proud, but I had
to go and find a new costume for the actual
dress-up day the following day.

Speaker 1 (50:23):
Oh, no, no, no. You wish you were in as Moana.

Speaker 6 (50:27):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (50:27):
Oh, sorry. One of those was cultural appropriation. She's going
to spend the day in there.

Speaker 2 (50:32):
Opposite ends of the Disney spectrum there.

Speaker 1 (50:36):
I like that you didn't go home. And obviously at
that age where you're not embarrassed by it, right? Yeah.

Speaker 3 (50:41):
Oh, she was so proud.

Speaker 1 (50:42):
Yeah. Actually get her own sort of special dispensation. Sarah,
thank you. Anonymous, what did you book early? Is that me?

Speaker 3 (50:52):
Yes.

Speaker 4 (50:53):
Oh, yeah, so she wasn't me.

Speaker 1 (50:54):
It was my friend. She had invited me to her
friend's wedding. Yeah.

Speaker 6 (50:59):
And we got all dressed up and all ready.

Speaker 10 (51:01):
We turned up and we're like, oh, we're at the
wrong place.

Speaker 8 (51:05):
We're like, no one's here.

Speaker 1 (51:06):
Like, what's going on? She's like, call your friend.

Speaker 8 (51:08):
And they're like, it was yesterday, honey.

Speaker 1 (51:11):
Oh, no. It wasn't early. It wasn't like, come back tomorrow.
You'd missed the wedding. Well, we'd fully missed it. And
she told me about it like weeks and a half.

Speaker 10 (51:19):
She was like, oh, do you want to come to
this wedding with me? I was like, yeah.

Speaker 8 (51:22):
And we got all ready.

Speaker 1 (51:23):
What sort of wedding just haphazardly lets you invite a
sort of a weird... friend plus one and then doesn't like...
They're calling me the weird friend. Yeah, that was weird
that you called her the weird friend. You're the weird friend.
I wouldn't have called you weird.

Speaker 2 (51:35):
I mean the whole situation of just like inviting like
a weird random to the wedding.

Speaker 1 (51:38):
That's so expensive.

Speaker 3 (51:39):
Again, weird.

Speaker 1 (51:40):
Why with the weird? Because she's weird. And now you
called her random. Did I say weird? You're weird. Nah,
I don't think you're weird.

Speaker 4 (51:45):
I think you're a bit weird.

Speaker 1 (51:47):
So you missed the whole wedding and were you like...
But no one else said that weird. Were you like,
it was weird, it's a Sunday. Called her weird. I'm
really confused. He's bamboozled you.

Speaker 4 (51:58):
So no one at the wedding texts you being like,
where are you?

Speaker 1 (52:03):
No, I guess not. They're probably too busy. Well, no
one knew her. She was the weird plus one. She's
not weird, Vaughan. She's weird, I can tell. You're a
bit weird, eh? It's weird that... What's the weirdest thing?
What's that noise in the background? It was weird too.
What a weirdo.

Speaker 6 (52:17):
I'm just stocking a fridge.

Speaker 1 (52:20):
What are you putting in there? Something weird. What are
you putting in it? Something that shouldn't go in the
fridge like tomato sauce. She's probably putting tomato sauce in
there the weirder. Jam, honey. Vaughan, please stop insulting the listeners.
You've actually just insulted her into silence. Anonymous. Thank you
for sharing. You're lovely, not weird. Thank you for sharing
your story. Some messages in. Oh, no. That's it. I
booked the Waz on a weekend and I checked. that

(52:43):
I'd have my boys.

Speaker 2 (52:43):
It was the strangest thing to seek permission to take
your kids out for the night from your ex. Luckily,
they were free and the ex was chill about it
this time, but I booked the wrong weekend for a while.

Speaker 1 (52:52):
I was going to take the kids. All right.

Speaker 2 (52:54):
Somebody else said, I managed to book accommodation on the
right day and dates, but two months later than when
we arrived.

Speaker 1 (53:02):
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Tuesday to Thursday. This is why,
and I've said it before, if you're booking travel, you've
got to use the TripIt app. Yes. Because it puts
everything in order.

Speaker 4 (53:12):
Every now and then it will chuck it in a
wrong order and you're like, when was I at the Pantheon?

Speaker 1 (53:16):
Because that's confused me. But then you can go through
it and be like, oh, I booked that for the
wrong day. You can also do that in a spreadsheet flat.

Speaker 6 (53:24):
No.

Speaker 1 (53:24):
This happened just in the week and I woke the
kids up really early to catch the first CRL train.
Drove from Browns Bay into central Auckland, got to the station,
I was an hour late.

Speaker 6 (53:32):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (53:32):
Missed the train. So you got the train, but just
not the first one. Not the first one. That was
the whole point. Yeah.

Speaker 11 (53:38):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (53:38):
I spent a month wishing a co-worker happy birthday. Knew
it was in that month, didn't know, but I couldn't
work out what day I actually nailed it.

Speaker 1 (53:46):
So they said every day. Oh, happy birthday.

Speaker 5 (53:50):
Oh, God.

Speaker 1 (53:50):
Never got it nailed down.

Speaker 4 (53:51):
I did write day and dates, like the day and
the numbers were right, but just two months off.

Speaker 1 (53:57):
Right. Two months later than when we arrived. So you're there. Oh, sorry.

Speaker 4 (54:02):
I was too harrowed by Anonymous and how much you've
insulted her.

Speaker 1 (54:06):
She was weird. You caught weird. She wasn't weird. It
was weird that someone would let someone invite a plus one.
That's what I said. And then you guys said I
called her weird, so I got stuck into it. But
you did call her weird. I didn't call her weird.

Speaker 2 (54:19):
I said it was a weird situation. I said it's
a weird just plus one.

Speaker 4 (54:22):
I think she's gone off thinking that Vaughn thinks that
she's weird, not that the situation's weird and she's going
to be looking in the mirror all day being like,
I thought it was normal.

Speaker 1 (54:29):
But it's also weird that you miss a wedding day
by one and you know no one else there well
enough for them to be like, hey, are you coming?
That's weird. Yeah, but it might have just been one
of their friends that isn't with the, you know. Surely
somebody else there knew about it. Are they okay? I
think I've been to a wedding where I don't know
a single soul.

Speaker 2 (54:46):
There's an empty seat. Okay, you're at a table and
you don't know, but you're like, where are they? And
someone else is like, oh, check in.

Speaker 4 (54:52):
Yeah, 028 said you did keep calling her weird.

Speaker 2 (54:56):
Well, I know I doubled down because you guys said
I was, I called her weird.

Speaker 1 (54:58):
Apologise now, please.

Speaker 3 (54:59):
She's gone.

Speaker 1 (55:00):
Apologise now. I don't even know her name. She's anonymous. Sorry, anonymous.
But it was a weird situation. You didn't mean it.
There was no sincerity to that. I wouldn't go to
a wedding as a plus one to people I'd never met.
This is like when we had to cancel the Vaughan
voicing the Red Cross appeal ads because he didn't sound genuine. God,
I was literally trying my hardest. He was like, yo,

(55:20):
Red Cross. And we were like, what the hell are
you doing? Pull it back. Pull it back. Okay.

Speaker 8 (55:25):
The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Hayley.

Speaker 4 (55:33):
Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.
.

Speaker 1 (55:42):
.

Speaker 2 (55:49):
It's dip week here at Fact of the Day. And
Fact of the Day, of course, is brought to you
by St.

Speaker 9 (55:52):
Pierre's.

Speaker 1 (55:54):
You're going to love our sushi. And our facts. Today's
sushi of the day is eight pieces of salmon supreme
for $ 8.

Speaker 11 (56:01):
40.

Speaker 1 (56:01):
Great for the brain. Full of omegas. Yeah, salmon. It is.
Eight minutes in the air fryer.

Speaker 2 (56:06):
Today's depth fact is about the Mariana Trench.

Speaker 3 (56:10):
Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 (56:11):
It's so crazy. So deep.

Speaker 2 (56:13):
Roughly 10,935 metres below the ocean surface.

Speaker 1 (56:18):
So, you know, 11 kilometres. Let's call it a nice
round 11 kilometres.

Speaker 2 (56:22):
Meaning that if you took Mount Everest at 8,849 metres
tall and plonked it in the Mariana Trench, the peak
of Mount Everest would still be two kilometres underwater.

Speaker 1 (56:31):
Wow, that's so dope.

Speaker 2 (56:33):
It was discovered in 1960 and two guys went down there,
Jacques Picard and Don Walsh, became the first and for
over 50 years, the only humans to reach the bottom.
And they saw life down there, which is insane. No
one believed possible because it's the equivalent of life living
in the pressure of living under 50 jumbo.

Speaker 1 (56:53):
Jets stacked on top of each other. I could hear
them pretty strong. I'd be squashed. You'd be flat as
a pancake. Wait, how did they go down in a submarine?

Speaker 3 (57:01):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (57:01):
Okay. It is wild, eh?

Speaker 2 (57:03):
It's like when they landed on the moon and then
were just like, yeah, well, we won't do that again
and haven't done for decades and decades and decades. And
the same with this. They got down there. And they
weren't just like, oh, we should look more around there.
They were like, well, that's kind of done now. And
then nobody else got back into it because it's insanity.

Speaker 1 (57:22):
Why would you? Why would you? It's insanity.

Speaker 2 (57:25):
So I thought that an interesting question would be, if
you were to just free fall, take the ocean out, right?
And then from the top of Everest, go across above
the Mariana Trench and just straight free fall the 19.8
kilometers difference between the 8,800 meters of Everest and 10,999.
meters depth of the trench how long would it take

(57:46):
you to fall free fall from the highest point on
earth to the lowest point on earth i don't know
six minutes oh.

Speaker 4 (57:54):
Yuck like if we just sat here for six minutes.

Speaker 1 (57:57):
Yeah six that would be so long six minutes.

Speaker 2 (58:00):
And that's not like if you went head down like
if you just tucked yourself in so from head down
from the height of everest to the bottom of the
made out of trench would be a six minute free
fall Goodness. You could get closer to four and a
half minutes if you went head down. That's like nearly
three Sabrina Carpenter songs. Well, how many of those, that
new song, who's that got?

Speaker 1 (58:20):
Six of them. Dominic Fyke. Dominic Fyke. Five of them, yeah.
Four of them. Flute that song four and a bit times.

Speaker 2 (58:27):
And that's how long it would take you to fall
from the highest point on earth to the lowest point
on earth. Of course, that's taken the water out of
the situation. I did do some calculations and Google AI
said that you just stop the minute you hit the water.
I was like, yeah, of course you would. He's like,
hitting the water surface at 120 miles an hour is
physically indistinguishable from hitting concrete.

Speaker 1 (58:48):
I was like, yep, take the water out.

Speaker 3 (58:50):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (58:50):
And let's see what we've got.

Speaker 2 (58:52):
So today's fact of the day is it would take,
if we plopped Everest into the Mariana Trench, the peak
of Everest would still be two kilometres below the surface
of the ocean.

Speaker 1 (59:03):
Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Do, do, do, do, do.
received a message from my lovely friend and fellow comedian,
Jessie Griffith.

Speaker 4 (59:29):
And he messages me and he is at a supermarket
and he sees a magazine, Who magazine, classic mag, gossip mag.

Speaker 1 (59:37):
That's not the one that's like, I'm pregnant to an alien.
It's a ghost. One of them.

Speaker 10 (59:43):
Oh, really?

Speaker 1 (59:44):
Yeah. It's like gossip, celeb gossip and that kind of stuff.
And crosswords. They probably have crosswords. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4 (59:51):
And then he took a picture of the cover of
Who magazine and said, oh my God, I just saw
this at the supermarket and genuinely thought it was you.

Speaker 1 (59:58):
Genuinely.

Speaker 4 (59:59):
And I looked at it and I saw a woman,
a white woman with brown hair and dark eyebrows. And
I thought, yeah, I can see how this could happen.
I tapped her and it's Brooke Shields. She's 61.

Speaker 3 (01:00:10):
61.

Speaker 1 (01:00:12):
So I'm 36 for reference. Yeah, yeah, okay.

Speaker 4 (01:00:15):
Brooke Shields is 61 years old. I was immediately offended.

Speaker 1 (01:00:19):
Yeah. How do you?

Speaker 4 (01:00:20):
I said, how absolutely do you? I said, Brooke Shields
is in her 60s. Looked it up, 61 years old.

Speaker 7 (01:00:26):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:00:26):
I said, Brooke Shields is in her 60s.

Speaker 5 (01:00:29):
I'm 36.

Speaker 1 (01:00:29):
And he messages back and says, yeah, but she's one
of the most, like, renowned supermodels of all time. And
I was like, oh, yeah, she is.

Speaker 5 (01:00:40):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:00:42):
Maybe I am somewhat of a... Did he send you
the photo? Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you could show us
the photo. Yeah. And like... She's frowning. I mean, because
I've got my Botox off. Oh, God. That looks nothing
like you. No, that doesn't look anything like you.

Speaker 5 (01:00:54):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:00:54):
Or maybe when you've been Botoxed. She has to go
to spec service. No, but she does. She's very... She
looks like a... She's, you know... an older woman in
this photo. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:01:04):
So then I was torn between what path I wanted
to take with this text. Am I offended that he
thinks I look similar? He clocked to the face of
a 61-year-old and thought, oh my God, look, Hayley's on
the cover of Who.

Speaker 1 (01:01:15):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:01:15):
Or am I tickled and complimented by the fact that
I look like one of the most notoriously beautiful women
of all time, Brooke Shields.

Speaker 1 (01:01:23):
But who is now 61. Well, hang on. Also, have
you seen Brooke Shields and who'd she have a baby with?
The Daughter?

Speaker 6 (01:01:31):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:01:32):
Andre Agassi.

Speaker 3 (01:01:33):
Really?

Speaker 1 (01:01:34):
Wasn't Brooke Shields married to tennis guy Andre Agassi for ages? Yeah,
I think so. Brooke Shields' daughter. Wait, I thought she
was an actress. Is she a supermodel? She was a
model as well. She's a supermodel. Oh, no, I'm thinking
of someone, another supermodel's daughter. Okay. I don't look 61. 61.
I have emailed the Botox lady. You don't look 60.
You look nothing like that photo. That doesn't look anything

(01:01:55):
like you. He needs glasses. It's very funny. Men like
this who think like, huh, he looks like my friend. No,
you don't. There's no thought process. No, you don't. You
don't ever say that. There's no thought process. I don't
think you ever say to a woman, you look like this.

Speaker 2 (01:02:10):
Even if you say, oh, I saw this picture, this photo.
If I do have a very attractive woman who reminds
me of you, they're going to be like, I don't
look like that. And now you made me realise and
think about the fact that I don't look like that.

Speaker 1 (01:02:22):
Yeah, it's like me.

Speaker 4 (01:02:23):
It's like when someone points to someone and goes, that's
a bit of you. And you look and you're like,
excuse you.

Speaker 1 (01:02:29):
How dare you? I don't get that wrong. You don't
get that wrong. Yeah, thank you.

Speaker 4 (01:02:34):
I actually like doing it to you, seeing someone who
is like 10 miles, like 10,000 miles away from a
bit of you, pointing them and being like, oi, that's
a bit of you.

Speaker 1 (01:02:43):
Just to see you be like, how dare you offend
me thus. Georgia is in studio from the day show.
who is a high-roxer. Oh, that actually sounds so good
when you say it. Does it? It actually does. I
thought you'd attended and watched. Have you done one? Excuse me? No,
she did one the next day. Thank you.

Speaker 9 (01:03:02):
I took the day off, watched Haim, my husband Haim,
and then I did it the next day with him.

Speaker 1 (01:03:06):
Probably not with the day of annual leave. Now, we
discussed this, the woman who's, she's like a champion high-roxer, right?

Speaker 9 (01:03:13):
Yeah, she's like one of the Elite Five or something,
I think. Yeah, Elite Five, is that what they call them?
There's like Elite 15, it's like the top 15 in
the world or something, and they get paid.

Speaker 1 (01:03:20):
And she, if you haven't seen the video, she's gone viral.
We've talked about it this morning already. She shadowed herself.
Liquid shadowed herself. Continued and won. It's not a... Would
you do... Is this what this Hyrox is like, Georgia?
Absolutely not. I'm sorry. There are multiple events all around
the world.

Speaker 9 (01:03:37):
Also.
It's on carpet you're sitting on a rolling machine you
need to replace it like that's disgusting yeah I can
maybe sort of a little bit be okay with the
marathon runners because you're outside and it's your own space
and blah blah blah but even then I'm like it
ain't healthy if you can't hold it.

Speaker 1 (01:03:55):
In But don't they have rules and stuff like other
crazy things?

Speaker 9 (01:03:58):
Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:03:59):
Just not this. I'm pretty sure. Can't spit on the ground,
but you can shit on the ground.

Speaker 3 (01:04:02):
Literally.

Speaker 1 (01:04:02):
I'm pretty sure we got.

Speaker 9 (01:04:03):
No, not me, because I touch my knees to the
ground for lunges. But I'm pretty sure you can get
like penalties if your knees don't hit the ground.

Speaker 1 (01:04:10):
If you're. Not low enough when you're doing a squat.
I don't want my knees on the ground if someone's.

Speaker 3 (01:04:13):
Shit on it.

Speaker 1 (01:04:14):
Well, that's what I mean. And so you get penalties
for that, but not if you shit yourself. Well, okay,
the warning ahead of summer. This comes to news via
the BBC. Could also end up with someone shitting themselves,
couldn't it, this news?

Speaker 10 (01:04:25):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (01:04:25):
Well, maybe, Vaughan, because champagne lovers may find themselves getting
tipsy more quickly after French producers have given the go-ahead
to raise the alcohol content in a bottle of bubbly
for the first time following the record heat wave in
Europe this summer.

Speaker 2 (01:04:42):
Sweeter.

Speaker 1 (01:04:43):
It's made it sweeter, and the alcohol content has gone
up 15% from 13%. I'm struggling to see an issue here.

Speaker 4 (01:04:49):
LAUGHTER Really struggling to see an issue.

Speaker 1 (01:04:54):
Of course, we would say, we will say drink in
moderation and drink sensibly. I know, but if I'm only
having one glass, how good. But already one glass of
champagne and it will be like, whew. I know, especially
if you haven't eaten anything, eh? I always just go, whew.
So it's the extreme hate. Get piss fit. Yeah. We
could do high rocks piss fit.

Speaker 10 (01:05:14):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:05:16):
Dairy halftime yeah come on what's the next one so
it's like you say hayley it's the sugar level so
it's the extreme heat and drought they produce grapes with
really high sugar levels and so that converts sugar into
alcohol during the fermentation yeah and then.

Speaker 2 (01:05:33):
They do a second fermentation on champagne isn't that where
the bubbles come.

Speaker 1 (01:05:35):
Yeah and so they reckon that this could actually become
the norm in 10 to 15 years just the way
that the planet's heating up make it nice and hot
Have you guys ever been to Champagne Region? No, I haven't, darling. Oh, darling,
I have. I went to Verve, click on.

Speaker 6 (01:05:46):
Oh, darling.

Speaker 11 (01:05:47):
Oh, gorgeous.

Speaker 9 (01:05:48):
And it's crazy because you're way underground in chalk. Like
it's a chalk mine.

Speaker 1 (01:05:53):
Right.

Speaker 9 (01:05:53):
And it's freezing under there. So I don't even know
how that's blooming a thing.

Speaker 1 (01:05:57):
Well, because they don't grow the grapes under there. Oh, yeah, true.

Speaker 9 (01:06:01):
Don't worry about me.

Speaker 1 (01:06:03):
I just wanted to brag about how I went to Verve. Yeah,
she just wanted to drop that in. Is that the
same trip to Europe where you came back with a
Louis Vuitton handbag? This is the only trip to Europe, actually.
The other half live out here. Yeah, wow. Wow. Okay,
coming up on the show. So what's the release date?
What's the drop date? Don't they have to age it?
It'll be like, it won't be this year. It'll be coming,

(01:06:24):
won't it? First grapes were cut in early August and
harvest expanded by the middle of the month, the earliest
ever recorded in Champagne.

Speaker 3 (01:06:31):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (01:06:32):
So that's the other thing is that they're making it
a lot earlier as well. So I'm not too sure.

Speaker 5 (01:06:36):
2028.

Speaker 1 (01:06:36):
15 months.

Speaker 7 (01:06:37):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:06:39):
I didn't know that, you know, not recycling or not washing,
recycling and putting straws up turtles' noses was going to
impact my wine drinking. And now I'm feeling very serious
about climate change. Should have mentioned this to Chloe Swarbrick yesterday.

Speaker 1 (01:06:52):
Wait, you should actually be pro-climate change if you want
the alcohol.

Speaker 4 (01:06:55):
Oh, yeah, if I want boozier wine.

Speaker 1 (01:07:01):
Well, Bryn joins us from the newsroom. Wasn't that great
music news, Bryn? That was fantastic. Fascinating. Yeah, thank you
for sharing that.

Speaker 4 (01:07:08):
It's making you redundant. We're sort of doing the music news.
Sometimes we're doing news news. I'm going to say the
R word around here.

Speaker 1 (01:07:14):
Just before we get into not enough for the news news, Bryn,
will you give us a news series? It weren't enough
for the main bulletin. How are you? Yeah, good, thanks.
It feels like it's been a while. Yeah, it has
been a while. Yeah, no, just all tickety-boo. Still a
bad boy? Oh, absolutely. Yeah?

Speaker 4 (01:07:29):
Yep, yep.

Speaker 5 (01:07:30):
I was going to say keeping out of trouble. What's
the opposite of that?

Speaker 1 (01:07:33):
Staying in trouble. That's it. Nice. Knee deep in trouble.
How's your 75 hard? How many times have we reset that? Oh,
how long did I last on that? 24 hours? Remind
people what that was again.

Speaker 5 (01:07:45):
I was meant to do 75 days of hard exercise,
reading 10 pages of a book every day.

Speaker 3 (01:07:52):
Journaling.

Speaker 1 (01:07:53):
Drinking about.

Speaker 5 (01:07:54):
five litres of water or something like that, something ridiculous.

Speaker 1 (01:07:57):
Too much.

Speaker 5 (01:07:58):
I didn't finish it. But that's like most things I start.
I think last time we checked, you didn't really start it.

Speaker 4 (01:08:02):
It was sort of doing a 24-hour sort of reset
each time.

Speaker 1 (01:08:05):
No, I went out for a steak dinner, I think.

Speaker 5 (01:08:06):
The first night.

Speaker 1 (01:08:07):
Yeah, that's right. That's right. That's a steak dinner. That'll
do it. That'll do it. All right, well, it's time
now for Bryn from the newsroom to read all the
news stories that didn't quite make the main bulletin. Yes.
Not enough for the news news. Let's do it. Kia ora,
good morning. I'm Bryn Rudkin.

Speaker 5 (01:08:23):
A county sheriff's office in Mississippi is on the hunt
for two male burglars who robbed a family home in
the early hours of Friday morning. While making their getaway,
the homeowner caught a quick glance of a bumper sticker
in the rear window reading, fat chicks only.

Speaker 1 (01:08:41):
Hey, we love that. You know?

Speaker 5 (01:08:44):
To muffin top things off, the men, described by the
witness as heavyset themselves.

Speaker 1 (01:08:50):
Oh, wow.

Speaker 5 (01:08:51):
Had the guts, plenty of guts in fact, to rob
the house in broad daylight, such as a curvaceous, sorry,
audacious act.

Speaker 1 (01:09:01):
Really good. This is good. Good, Hayley. Thank you. Thanks.
Really good.

Speaker 5 (01:09:05):
Once located, the pair will be heavily punished.

Speaker 1 (01:09:07):
Because they're fair. I don't think it works if you
explain the joke, Hayley. No, no, it's good. It was
a nice touch.

Speaker 6 (01:09:14):
Yeah.

Speaker 5 (01:09:15):
And all items will be rotund, sorry, returned to the
property owner.

Speaker 1 (01:09:19):
That's good. That's good. Rory's just messaging. This story's got
me flabby-gasted. Oh, that's really good. That's really good. You
missed that one. Yeah, I missed that. Thanks, Rory. Good
from Rory.

Speaker 5 (01:09:30):
Staying in the States, Michigan. I was a bit dry
on puns today, I'll say.

Speaker 1 (01:09:35):
No, the right amount. Oh, thank you.

Speaker 5 (01:09:38):
Because there is another member of this show who tends
to maybe.

Speaker 1 (01:09:42):
Well, Brin, brace yourself because this is co-written.

Speaker 6 (01:09:45):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (01:09:46):
You work out which one I wrote.

Speaker 3 (01:09:47):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:09:48):
Oh, no. Not that one. Okay.

Speaker 5 (01:09:50):
While staying in the States, Michigan's Secretary of State has
made a right cock-up after a printing error.

Speaker 1 (01:09:56):
I just put that in. It wasn't a pun. I
just couldn't think of a better way of describing a mistake. Right.

Speaker 5 (01:10:00):
Slapped the same smiling stranger's face onto 8,200 new driver's licenses.

Speaker 1 (01:10:10):
So this isn't about... penises.

Speaker 4 (01:10:12):
No, I just put cock up and I think it's
a funny way of saying I made a mistake. But yeah,
8,200 people got this one man's face on them.

Speaker 3 (01:10:18):
Wow.

Speaker 5 (01:10:19):
An anonymous stock photo man whose skin tone was described
by one woman as, holy hell, I'd need a few
bottles of fake tan to achieve that, was seen happy
and smiling on thousands of licences.

Speaker 1 (01:10:29):
There's no way of saying he's black.

Speaker 5 (01:10:33):
Making it rather difficult for Michigan's 21-year-olds to get into
the clubs without having to take some rather problematic steps
in order to do so.

Speaker 1 (01:10:41):
Blackface. Yeah, that's what I was thinking.

Speaker 5 (01:10:44):
The issue was brought to the state's attention after receiving
thousands of messages saying, who dis? That's really good. The
printers have had to put on a blackface, sorry, braveface,
and take responsibility for the error, saying it's about what's
on the inside that counts.

Speaker 1 (01:11:04):
Yeah, really good. That was probably my best work I've
ever written in my life. I don't know if it was. Yeah,
I think there was one joke in there.

Speaker 5 (01:11:10):
There's still another line, actually, if you don't mind.

Speaker 1 (01:11:13):
Oh, sorry.

Speaker 5 (01:11:14):
They approached the stock model for comment, but when they
looked him up, they found 8,200 results.

Speaker 1 (01:11:20):
That was a better ending. Better ending, yeah, sure. So
is this your contribution warning? Who knows? Obviously, yes. No
one knows. Okay.

Speaker 5 (01:11:29):
Finally, a UK driver made his drive even whiskier by
doing it blind drunk as well as standard blind. Anthony
Hall was speeding, drunk, blind and unlicensed when his rum
down the M6 came to an end. Rum?

Speaker 1 (01:11:46):
Barely able to stand. Oh yeah, that's good.

Speaker 5 (01:11:49):
He whined to the officers before having his wife's vodka impounded.

Speaker 4 (01:11:55):
Oh, that's literally the best one. That's made me internally
laugh so hard.

Speaker 5 (01:11:59):
Police said he narrowly missed a female driver. He was
lucky not to kill her and better not do it
A gin.

Speaker 1 (01:12:08):
Okay. Too many puns. Too many puns. Hang on. Give
that last sentence a reread. It's packed.

Speaker 5 (01:12:15):
Police said he narrowly missed a female driver. He was
lucky not to kill her. Yep.

Speaker 1 (01:12:22):
And he better not do it. A gin. It's not bad.
It's not bad. I tell you what. It's a little clunky.
I think the whole thing was quite clunky today, Bryn.
I'm going to be honest here.

Speaker 5 (01:12:33):
That might have been a redemption for you, Vorni.

Speaker 7 (01:12:36):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (01:12:36):
Okay, wow. And for me? It could have gone on
even longer than that, that story. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well,
they normally do, don't they? They tend to.

Speaker 4 (01:12:43):
They normally do and yet have no news about the
actual story itself.

Speaker 1 (01:12:46):
Yeah. This was sort of a good balance. Yeah, so
he killed– No, he was lucky not to take any
of that.

Speaker 2 (01:12:52):
Do you know, in all seriousness, he literally is legally blind.
He was blind drunk. He had drunk four bottles of wine.

Speaker 3 (01:12:58):
Yeah. Jesus.

Speaker 2 (01:13:00):
He was driving his wife's car because he legally can't
own a car because he's legally blind. Do you know
how he was driving down the M6 for so long?

Speaker 3 (01:13:06):
Why?

Speaker 1 (01:13:06):
He was following the lights of the truck in front
of him.

Speaker 6 (01:13:09):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (01:13:09):
Oh, yeah, that's good.

Speaker 4 (01:13:10):
I do that sometimes when it's dark. I like to
follow someone. Just follow some lights.

Speaker 3 (01:13:15):
Jesus.

Speaker 1 (01:13:16):
Thanks, Bryn.

Speaker 8 (01:13:17):

Speaker 1 (01:13:20):
ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Now, I don't know if Taylor
Swift should be over the moon at this news or
horribly disgusted. Oh, she's got a lot to be happy about, billionaire, married.
In Australia, scientists have discovered 12 new species and five new,
what do you say, why do you say genera? Are

(01:13:41):
they like generations?

Speaker 2 (01:13:44):
Is it above or below? Subspecies is below species. It's
like genre of a species.

Speaker 1 (01:13:51):
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:13:52):
What genre of species?

Speaker 1 (01:13:54):
They have discovered 12 new species and five new genre
of tiny plant bugs found on Australian shiok trees. Shiok trees? Now,
they have named one of these species after Taylor Swift,
the Swifty Phyllis. Swifty Phyllis. That's its official, you know

(01:14:16):
how they have like... Oh, that's cute. Yeah, a Swifty Phyllis.
So P-H-Y-L-U-S. Swifty... Phyllis. Why did they name it after her?

Speaker 2 (01:14:24):
Generally when they do this, there'll be some feature of
the creature that lines up with the celebrity.

Speaker 1 (01:14:30):
I'll show you a feature. Nothing... Oh, yuck. It's blonde. Yeah,
got a reddy kind of a... But does it sing?
Is it swift? No. I think whoever did this is
a big Swifty. Because not only did they name the
Swifty Phyllis, it's also three of its four species are

(01:14:50):
named after her albums. Lover and Fearless. And, yeah.

Speaker 9 (01:14:56):
Name it up.

Speaker 1 (01:14:57):
It's yuck. It looks like a bed bug under a microscope.
It has a camouflage trick. And it seems to have evolved... Yeah,
it's yuck. Is it like her because she has eras?
It's evolved yuck. It mimics the red and cream flowers
of the host tree. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it kind
of camouflages in so it can't be seen. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm not saying, that's not what they're saying about Taylor Swift. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:15:17):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:15:18):
But if you were Taylor Swift or you were mega famous,
would you be honoured or would you be disgusted?

Speaker 4 (01:15:23):
Not if, I am actually as Hayley Sproul, incredibly famous.

Speaker 1 (01:15:27):
Of course. And I would be offended.

Speaker 4 (01:15:29):
I want my name to go to something cool like a...
Like a mental disorder. Like something you can get diagnosed with.

Speaker 1 (01:15:40):
Oh, you've got the Sproul. Sproul syndrome.

Speaker 9 (01:15:42):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:15:43):
And everyone online's like, I've got the Sproul syndrome. I've
diagnosed myself. Oh my God. You 100% have Sproul syndrome.

Speaker 4 (01:15:50):
It's like when someone will give you a thousand compliments,
but one person gives you an insult and you go
away and you spend maybe the rest of the year
thinking on that one insult. but not thinking about the
thousands of compliments you received as well. And you sort
of like grow it and sort of make it your
entire personality. That's Sproul syndrome.

Speaker 1 (01:16:06):
That's the name of it.

Speaker 4 (01:16:08):
I'd rather that than a stinky bug. So the director
of relationship science for Hinge, so they actually have like
a psychologist and scientists on Hinge looking into things to
make better matches for you.

Speaker 6 (01:16:24):
Okay. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:16:25):
His name is Logan Urie. He also wrote a book
called How to Not Die Alone.

Speaker 1 (01:16:30):
Oh, wow. Okay.

Speaker 4 (01:16:33):
He has given some tips on how to get over
a crush. So not a relation, not like a bad breakup,
but when you've been crushing on someone hard and it
just hasn't happened, which I sometimes think can be so hard.

Speaker 1 (01:16:44):
Because... you haven't had to go through the shit with them.
You know what I mean? Yeah. The actual act of
being together hasn't soured the fantasy. You've had this sort
of like ideal crush.

Speaker 11 (01:16:56):
Oh, yes.

Speaker 1 (01:16:56):
You know what I mean?

Speaker 4 (01:16:57):
So here's some advice from him on how to get
over a crush if maybe they've met someone else or
you've learned something about them that you don't like or
you've had to move on. Reality check the fantasy is
his first bit of advice. Ask whether you actually know
this person's habits and flaws. or you have just been
mentally dating an idealized version of them in your head.

(01:17:17):
So exactly what I just said, which is like, oh,
he's so dreamy, so nice, or she's so this and
she's so that.

Speaker 1 (01:17:24):
And then not like, They don't put the toilet seat down. Yeah.
They smell. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:17:30):
They don't ask questions. You know, like the actual reality.
Check yourself. Is this a fantasy?

Speaker 1 (01:17:35):
Is this reality? It's what it's like looking at someone
on Instagram. We all look at people's lives. You're not
putting up the bad stuff.

Speaker 11 (01:17:41):
Yes, exactly.

Speaker 1 (01:17:41):
You're putting up, you know, the highlights. Yeah, oh my God, yeah. Well,
not me.

Speaker 4 (01:17:45):
Everything you see on Instagram is true, true, true. And
definitely not from 10 years ago. List what you did
like about them to learn. So name the specific traits
that drew you in. It helps you to clarify what
you actually look for in a partner.

Speaker 11 (01:17:57):
Yep.

Speaker 1 (01:17:58):
For a future partner.

Speaker 4 (01:17:59):
So if you're like, I really like that they were
funny or I really like that they were quiet or
softly spoken or sweet or something like that. Those are
the things you're not saying goodbye to. You're just going
to look for them elsewhere.

Speaker 1 (01:18:09):
Yeah. Consider no contact. Delete them from your Instagram basically.
Stop scrolling. Stop stalking them. Stop looking. Stop looking.

Speaker 4 (01:18:16):
Redirect the urge to reach out. Text a friend instead.
I've been thinking about this person again. Rather than messaging
being like... still thinking of you. It's like, that's not helpful.

Speaker 3 (01:18:25):
No.

Speaker 1 (01:18:25):
The crush has to go for a reason.

Speaker 4 (01:18:27):
Text a friend and said when that impulse hits.

Speaker 1 (01:18:31):
Reconnect with your own pleasure. Basically, have a. Have a.

Speaker 3 (01:18:34):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (01:18:35):
Yep. With yourself. Get that out. Okay. Gotcha. Get that
out of the system. Happy to.

Speaker 4 (01:18:39):
Because sometimes that's all it is. And then when you,
you'll realise, oh, no, no, no, I don't actually need
to do that.

Speaker 1 (01:18:47):
Stop digging for updates.

Speaker 4 (01:18:48):
That's the same remember their choices aren't about you so
if their choice is like I don't want to date
I don't want to date you so that's why you've
got to get rid of the crush basically you're like
I'm not the problem it's you there's nothing wrong with
me it's not about you that's something else that you
know they don't you've got no control over and to
reinvest in your own life Basically reconnect with friends, hobbies,

(01:19:09):
and routines that feel good and positive rather than dwelling
on the fact that you didn't get the man or
you didn't get the girl or you didn't, you know,
they don't like you in that same way.

Speaker 1 (01:19:15):
You got a crush at the moment, Fletch?

Speaker 3 (01:19:17):
No.

Speaker 1 (01:19:19):
Vaughan, you got a crush? No. No, no crush. No crush. Well,
I'm in a relationship. You're allowed crushes though, aren't you?
You're allowed crushes. Yeah, you're allowed to crush it.

Speaker 11 (01:19:30):
It's 9-6-9-6.

Speaker 6 (01:19:30):
9-6-9-6.

Speaker 4 (01:19:30):
If you're in a relationship, you're allowed to crush.

Speaker 1 (01:19:34):
You probably do when it gets a little bit stagnant
and stale. Maybe people get a crush on it.

Speaker 4 (01:19:37):
Yeah, you're just not allowed to act on it if
you're in that kind of traditional set-up.

Speaker 1 (01:19:40):
Right. The traditional set-up. Traditional whatever the word is. Monogamy
or something like that. Oh, I'm busting for a wheeze
after that podcast, I'll tell you. It's a podcast. You
are allowed to listen to it while you're weak. There's
no rules on when and where you're allowed to listen
to a podcast. It just says here I'm busting for

(01:20:00):
a wheeze. I read it, okay? I read it.

Speaker 9 (01:20:03):
Give us a review.

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Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 15th September 2026

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;} Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 15th September 2026