Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
With our listeners smartest people in the world, would they
be able to answer, Oh, not only not only not
only are they the smartest, but we also have a
ton of people who work with like lab animals, right, research,
With all the research and everything that goes on around here,
did we learn there's more monkeys around.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
Here than anywhere else in the world. So we heard,
thank you. So now we've got two groups of people.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
We've got people that work with lab animals and research,
and then we just have another group of people that
are just the smartest people in the world. City birds
are more afraid of women than men.
Speaker 3 (00:42):
Oh so these are actual birds?
Speaker 2 (00:44):
What do you mean?
Speaker 3 (00:45):
Well, I didn't know if it was like snowbirds.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
No, no, no, no, no, like actual birds.
Speaker 3 (00:49):
No, pigeons.
Speaker 1 (00:50):
Thirty thirty six different types of city birds. I don't
know what every city bird is. Pigeons, birds, doves.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
What what she said? MANI crows? MANI mocking mockingbirds. Okay,
mocking birds. Now I got two. Let's keep going, Kristen,
this is going well.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
No, no, so thirty six different types of birds that
you would find in this And when I say city
I don't know if they mean like, oh, it's got
to be DC. But like city areas, right, like old
Town Alexandria, resting, I don't care. But city birds, city
(01:38):
birds are more afraid of women than men. Why, I'm
telling you, I don't know the answer. This isn't a
quiz and I'm gonna see how you do. I don't
know the answer to that.
Speaker 3 (01:52):
So when they studied these birds, they just noticed this.
They did not come with a hypothesis.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
No, and they tried to sting everything. And when I
got to the part about like we have lab people.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
Yeah, if you take.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
Not birds but lab animals, lab animals, rats, monkeys.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
Mice, dogs, whatever they're whatever they're doing.
Speaker 1 (02:20):
Lab animals tend to be more fearful of men than
of women. But birds in the wild are more fearful
of women than men.
Speaker 4 (02:37):
So the lab, why the lab animals have to be
Are they just poked and prodded more by men?
Speaker 2 (02:44):
They're just more lab male lab workers.
Speaker 3 (02:46):
I don't know the answer to that. That's gotta be it.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
I have no idea. But so but if you believe,
if you believe this, birds know if you're a man
or a woman, birds know sex.
Speaker 3 (03:00):
Well, no, no, they're reacting to something, whether it be fair,
it's like sent or something, or.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
Would I be close enough that they would be able
to tell.
Speaker 3 (03:10):
Well, they'd be more afraid of Diane. Are they knowing?
Speaker 1 (03:13):
What?
Speaker 2 (03:14):
So they could smell Diane before they could smell me.
Speaker 3 (03:16):
I don't you said? They don't know if it's smell related.
Speaker 2 (03:18):
No, they don't. They don't know. But how would they
know Diane's a woman and I'm I'm a man?
Speaker 3 (03:26):
Would Diane? Well, they actually see these guns, say again,
almost mirroring what their reaction ends up being.
Speaker 2 (03:37):
What do you mean like Diane gets all like yes?
Speaker 3 (03:40):
Is that scared because they appear the female appear more
or appear larger like you're supposed to get with some
animals to scare them off.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
Thirty six thirty seven excuse me?
Speaker 1 (03:51):
Bird species are afraid of women more that that they
tested are more afraid of.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
Women than they are men.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
Men were able to get three feet closer to birds
than women before the animals flew away, no matter what
the men were wearing or what the women were wearing,
no matter what their height was, or how they tried
to approach, which I don't know what that means.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
Like when my tiptoeing up on the bird or just
walking towards the bird.
Speaker 1 (04:25):
But I can get three feet closer to the bird
than Diane can.
Speaker 3 (04:31):
Are you going to be able to carry on Diane
knowing that I'm fine?
Speaker 2 (04:36):
No, no, no, But why?
Speaker 1 (04:37):
I mean yes, the obvious answer there is that the
birds like me better. But that's just Diane and I.
But Diane and any other man that man could get
three feet closer to a bird than Diane can.
Speaker 3 (04:53):
Doesn't this all sound like a like a setup, sound
like a setup to a joke.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
It's not.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
No, no, it's not gonna be It's not like it's
not like why the men die before their wives. They
want to feel that. No, but it's not, it's not.
This is and they studied this. They studied this.
Speaker 3 (05:09):
Okay, Donna, it's not because women are evil, Donna. Oh
and whenever you're ready, Kristin has a theory.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
Oh this will be good, Kristin, do you mind?
Speaker 1 (05:22):
But again, when they say it doesn't matter how you approach,
I don't. I don't know if I understand that, Like
does that mean front your back.
Speaker 4 (05:29):
Or the side or does it mean like sh yeah,
I mean maybe you come you come up to them
them in a more aggressive way women do.
Speaker 2 (05:38):
So you think, I don't.
Speaker 1 (05:39):
Know, But but then why are lab animals so much
more afraid of men?
Speaker 3 (05:43):
I think it's because of the numbers dominated.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
Just numbers, so there's more male research. Right.
Speaker 3 (05:51):
It's like when you have an abused animal at a rescue,
they sometimes have to have the employees who are female
or the opposite male if the abuser was.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
A female to deal with. Yes, okay, that's fine. But
there are more lab men than lab women.
Speaker 3 (06:16):
I guess. So that's what we are positing. I don't
are you flexed? Oh you're looking for a five five?
Speaker 2 (06:21):
No, that's good.
Speaker 3 (06:22):
I thought you were showing off your guns again.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
The no, that was for the birds, yes, Kristen.
Speaker 5 (06:28):
Well, two things. The first thing is this why I
get attacked by the local Rockville mocking birds every year
when I'm.
Speaker 3 (06:35):
Walking oaf.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
No they're well, no, they're afraid of you.
Speaker 5 (06:40):
But they're attacking me. Do they think I'm going to
approach their.
Speaker 6 (06:44):
Nest or something?
Speaker 2 (06:46):
How do they attack you?
Speaker 5 (06:47):
They come down and swoop in like my hair moves. Yes,
Mike didn't believe me, and then he walked with us
and he's like why are they coming after you?
Speaker 2 (06:57):
Wait, what is the bird that has great memory? Crows? Yeah,
crows and hold grudges.
Speaker 1 (07:02):
Yeah, because remember they would swoop down and get people
at McDonald's.
Speaker 2 (07:07):
I don't think that's it. I don't think that's it.
Speaker 5 (07:09):
But I'm also wondering if maybe they fear women because
women have like a quote motherly.
Speaker 2 (07:20):
Thing.
Speaker 3 (07:21):
What does what do you mean motherly?
Speaker 2 (07:23):
Think? But why would they be like like like an aura.
Speaker 5 (07:26):
Like yeah, like maybe they think to go and take
the babies out of their nest and like care for them.
Speaker 6 (07:33):
So you think the pigeon, well not a pigeon walking
walking down walking on fourteenth Street, just trying to eat
some trash, is like, now here comes a woman gonna
want to take my babies?
Speaker 5 (07:44):
Well, I don't know why women, Like why what?
Speaker 2 (07:47):
Why would that's what they're asking.
Speaker 5 (07:48):
But the only thing I could think of is like
maybe they're like motherly where a man is like oh whatever,
there's but then you know, birds in the nurse leave
it alone.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
Okay, But they just doesn't say anything about approaching their nests.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
I know.
Speaker 5 (08:01):
But maybe that's why they feel so that's why it's innate.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
Yes, maybe all right, I mean, listen, I don't have
the answer. I don't have the cheat sheet in front
of me. This is what researchers are now. But the
first thing I thought when I saw it is you
know who'll know the answer to this?
Speaker 2 (08:16):
Our listeners.
Speaker 3 (08:20):
Uh maybe this is my fault for bringing up comedy,
But Dirk says, you can't trust anything that bleeds. Yeah,
you know the rest of that, and even al Toyito
getting in on the fun.
Speaker 2 (08:37):
Oh yes, oh yes.
Speaker 3 (08:40):
Bitches be crazy. No, he writes to the birds. No,
women are bad drivers. See it just sounds like.
Speaker 2 (08:50):
It does sound like, but it's not. It's not. First
of all, is that not fascinating to everybody?
Speaker 3 (08:59):
It's an interesting the menstrual cycle, the well that is
not with them? There? Christ is there?
Speaker 1 (09:10):
I know an intruder that God stabbed ten times a
male he didn't live.
Speaker 3 (09:15):
Jokes aside, Oh yes, did they say the age of
the women?
Speaker 2 (09:21):
No?
Speaker 3 (09:23):
So so none of these people that were studied do
we know if they are women and men? But we
don't know if they were actively ministruating or if they
are I.
Speaker 2 (09:37):
See where you're going, I see where you're going.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
No longer could there be a tie to the menzies. Yeah,
they're not afraid of the mensis. Y'all. Don't see y'all
it's altoyda. You started it. No, I didn't. Actually it
was a dirk.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
I gotta fly away that that animal been bleeding the week.
You know what it is.
Speaker 1 (10:11):
It's like whenever we go to the like if we
go to a VIP happy hour and we go over
by like where they're selling all the crabs, and I
walked down by there and I was like, oh, hello, ladies.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
It's the same thing with the birds.
Speaker 3 (10:24):
Hey, Johnny from Lava Bird Sense, the instability of the
female psyche. Oh, here we go. This person's actually helping.
Brian is outing here. No, I'm serious, that bitch nuts.
Going back to the lab animals, Yes, my friend used
(10:45):
to work at an animal testing facility and it was
the women that would feed and play with the animals
and the male doctors who did the testing.
Speaker 2 (10:52):
Oh, doctor nurse.
Speaker 4 (10:53):
That makes sense.
Speaker 2 (10:55):
That makes a ton of sense.
Speaker 1 (10:57):
So the women are there kind of like to prop
come up, and then I come in and I do
the work. That's a great explanation. Now let's get back
to why the women be scaring the birds? Line seven, Hi,
Ellie in the morning.
Speaker 2 (11:16):
Just me, Yeah, Hi, who's this?
Speaker 7 (11:18):
Hey, it's Danny from a woodbridge.
Speaker 2 (11:21):
Yes, sir.
Speaker 7 (11:22):
So my theory is, well, the lab birds maybe aren't
scared because they've never been around predators, so they're growing
up in a lab they don't know the difference wild birds.
The women have a higher pitched voice perhaps, and their
sight is good so they can recognize on site what
they sound like more maybe more like a predator like
a cat, fox, other bit bird with a higher pitch sound.
Speaker 1 (11:44):
Now I will say that's a great by the way,
now we're getting somewhere. That's a great question because in
the study, thank you, sir. In the study it doesn't
say anything about talking. Oh okay, so it talks about
is it they're obviously they're approaching, So.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
Is it the gate? Maybe? Do women have a different
gait than men?
Speaker 3 (12:08):
What's with the thigh gap?
Speaker 4 (12:11):
No?
Speaker 2 (12:11):
No, that that is like is a gate? Just stride?
Speaker 3 (12:14):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (12:15):
Right, Well, male legs longer than women legs typically.
Speaker 3 (12:19):
Could it be clothing related, jewelry? Maybe the shoes if
you have like heels on occasionally when people walk around
and heels, doesn't it sound like if they have on
really short shorts. No, but it sounds like a horse.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Yeah, sometimes like a gallop?
Speaker 3 (12:34):
Right, yeah, So do they think that the woman's a
horse and they're afraid of horses? You got it?
Speaker 2 (12:40):
Oh my God, solved it.
Speaker 1 (12:47):
They don't know if it's they don't know. Maybe it's smell,
which gets us back to no, but women smell differently
than men.
Speaker 3 (12:56):
Have you read any of this new propaganda about how
we're not supposed to spray colonne or perfume on our necks?
Speaker 2 (13:06):
Why and why we call it propaganda?
Speaker 4 (13:09):
Are you still doing pulse points though?
Speaker 3 (13:11):
Yes, I put it on my wrist and then put
it on my next Still it's not the scent directly,
I don't know. There was a whole article in GQ yesterday.
Speaker 2 (13:20):
Wait a minute, Christian, you just spray your neck? Do
you even you wear perfume? Where do you do? You
do you necks? I did start, I did start. You
know what it is?
Speaker 3 (13:33):
I have a lot of that colone.
Speaker 1 (13:35):
I have a lot of spin on my lip from
uh from you put colone on every day?
Speaker 2 (13:39):
Am I the only one that if you.
Speaker 3 (13:41):
Do wear clone every day? Not every day? But I
get called out wearing cologne? Was that your house? Yeah, why,
I told you you smelled good.
Speaker 2 (13:48):
No, but you said why you said why?
Speaker 3 (13:51):
Well, to me, it wasn't a crazy thing to do.
Speaker 2 (13:56):
To put on cologne for a Shiva coal. Sorry, I
don't know what to call it. The no, but there
was a reason why. There was a reason why you
even said.
Speaker 3 (14:10):
Oh, yes, I think I was just self conscious about No.
Speaker 2 (14:13):
There was something about there was something you were like.
I didn't.
Speaker 1 (14:16):
I wasn't going to have time to like change or something,
and so I put on cologne.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
In the meantime we went straight from work.
Speaker 3 (14:23):
That's not true.
Speaker 2 (14:25):
Yeah it was. Oh no, I guess we did go home.
I didn't.
Speaker 3 (14:31):
But back to the matter at hand.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
Yeah, why didn't bitches be crazier?
Speaker 3 (14:35):
A risky place to spray colone?
Speaker 2 (14:37):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (14:37):
Okay. The idea is that the thyroid is directly absorbing
chemicals from products applied to the neck.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
And you know I already have a pituitary.
Speaker 4 (14:46):
Everybody, you confused the two which is the fat one.
A lot of people have thyroid issues from which can
cause weight game because of all the chemicals.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
No, but didn't everybody in like high school have been
like it's a twoitary problem.
Speaker 3 (15:01):
No? Now, no one said that.
Speaker 2 (15:04):
No, hey, you're busted out your path. It's a pituitary problem.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
Oh, here we go the chair of dermatology at Drexel.
Speaker 2 (15:12):
Oh yes, that's in Philly.
Speaker 3 (15:14):
You know anyone who went to Drexel.
Speaker 2 (15:15):
Mister Leonard, thanks you.
Speaker 3 (15:17):
The idea that the thyroid is directly absorbing chemicals from
products applied to the neck is not anatomically accurate. The
skin of the neck is separated from the thyroid by
multiple layers of tissue, including muscle, thank you. And there
is no direct pathway from the skin surface to the
thyroid glands. So spray it good.
Speaker 2 (15:39):
Yes, you're fine. Line two. Hi elliot in the morning. Yeah, hi,
who's this?
Speaker 1 (15:53):
Yes, wire birds more afraid of women than men.
Speaker 8 (15:59):
I think, because I know when I see a bird,
I run after them to try to catch them and
pet them. So they probably think I'm like Elmira from
Learning Tone, whereas lab birds they're already caught, so they
don't afraid.
Speaker 1 (16:13):
Okay, well, don't don't worry about don't worry about lab animals.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
Right, these are just birds in the wild.
Speaker 1 (16:18):
So you think women are more likely to chase them
to try to pet them.
Speaker 2 (16:24):
Yeah, okay, you know what that could be. That could be.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
Do you do you try to like, do you try
to catch a lot of birds to pet them?
Speaker 8 (16:35):
I mean, if anytime I see a bird or any animal,
you do you.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
Really any animal? Dude?
Speaker 1 (16:40):
You gotta be careful. You don't want to grab onto
like a fox or a coyote or something.
Speaker 8 (16:47):
Okay, maybe the ones that are.
Speaker 2 (16:48):
Nice I got, like an opossum. The all right, very good? No,
that may be. That may be. Listen, the researchers don't know.
Speaker 1 (17:00):
Maybe birds think like Kristen, you could actually put those
two together. The bird thinks that the woman is trying
to approach and get after them, the same way the
bird may think, crazy, lady there, everybody's running after them
to try to get them.
Speaker 3 (17:17):
Now, this message from snapchat doesn't say that women are crazy.
It says they're manipulative.
Speaker 2 (17:28):
Line four, Hi Elliott in the morning. Hi is this me? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (17:33):
Hi?
Speaker 2 (17:34):
Who's this?
Speaker 8 (17:35):
Hi?
Speaker 9 (17:35):
Good morning?
Speaker 8 (17:36):
Does this Alex?
Speaker 2 (17:37):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (17:37):
Why are the Why are the birds more afraid of
women than men?
Speaker 2 (17:42):
So?
Speaker 9 (17:43):
I remember years ago into the zoo as my kid,
and they told us that in birds of prey like
raw like owls and eagles and stuff or hawks, the
females tend to be bigger where the males are smaller
and more colorful. So I wonder if they think think
that the female like women are smaller and maybe dress
(18:05):
more colorful.
Speaker 8 (18:06):
Then can I ask this?
Speaker 1 (18:08):
I think, by the way, your answer may be one
hundred percent right. I don't know, but let me ask
Let me ask this question. Don't you believe that if
we were going to research this thing? Right, so they said, Elliott,
put together a team of researchers and let's do this.
Wouldn't you wouldn't you agree that we would have the
(18:28):
men and the women dress very similarly. That we're not
going to have one who's dressed up in jewelry and
hairspray and all that other stuff and the other one's
going to just be wearing shorts like we would. We
would try to mimic each other as best we could.
Speaker 3 (18:45):
But that's why courses hair length. Could that be playing
a part?
Speaker 2 (18:52):
Yeah?
Speaker 10 (18:52):
I mean, well that's what I was thinking.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
Yeah, no, no, listen you you could be one hundred
percent right, but yeah, I think.
Speaker 2 (18:59):
If you were, Thank you, ma'am.
Speaker 1 (19:00):
I think if you were to say, on average, on aggregate,
who would tend to have longer hair women.
Speaker 2 (19:08):
Yeah, on aggregatet Diane.
Speaker 3 (19:10):
When you got that haircut, I wish Diane had long
Did you feel like you were scaring less birds? Jesus Christ,
it frightened me, just human.
Speaker 2 (19:23):
Oh yeah, it was bro. Sorry, not bro, sir. Where
am I going? Line seven?
Speaker 3 (19:36):
Hi?
Speaker 2 (19:36):
Elliott in the morning.
Speaker 10 (19:38):
Elliott, Yes, sir, Hey is Patrick from Baltimore.
Speaker 2 (19:42):
Yes, sir, Hey.
Speaker 10 (19:44):
While I do find the theories of menstrual cycles and
bad driving entertaining, I do think it's more My hypothesis
is more like what the last college just said, city
women tend to carry purses and feel in the wild unconstant,
kind of like an audio visual thing.
Speaker 1 (20:05):
But okay, all right, So I was just gonna say,
so that would make it that so they would just
be more fearful of them. There's more going on, there's
more noise, there's more Yeah, there's just more study.
Speaker 2 (20:16):
Yeah that could be.
Speaker 10 (20:17):
Yeah, they would be studying in environment in the city, right.
You know what, you know what I wish I don't
necessarily have the control.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
Yeah, No, You're absolutely right, and I'm willing to accept that.
The one thing that I wish that they would have.
Speaker 2 (20:29):
Thank you, sir.
Speaker 1 (20:30):
That they would have said, is I know that in
this study, on average, a man could get three feet
closer to the bird than the woman.
Speaker 2 (20:38):
But how close were they?
Speaker 1 (20:40):
Like was it twelve feet and nine feet or was
it six feet and three feet or was it four
feet and one feet?
Speaker 3 (20:50):
I mean, these are city birds, so I bet they're
four feet in one closer than first.
Speaker 2 (20:54):
I agree.
Speaker 3 (20:54):
I agree because sometimes they don't move at all.
Speaker 2 (20:57):
Right, I hate that, Hey hate that.
Speaker 3 (21:03):
But for all the theories we've heard, all of the guesses,
it's still doesn't really make it all make sense. No,
and again the researchers don't know. There still needs to
be more study. Got this sense that it's all still
very irrational, you know, like women. I wasn't trying to
(21:27):
sow you up or anybody up, But the second I
used that word, I thought of.
Speaker 2 (21:31):
Women and Diane, why can't you trust.
Speaker 3 (21:37):
Them because bites be crazy?
Speaker 2 (21:39):
No? No, because they bleed