Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
You've had hemorrhoids during childbirth, right, yep? Did you have
to get them operated on?
Speaker 2 (00:05):
No?
Speaker 3 (00:06):
Thankfully not. They just went back down because I've heard
that that surgery we're coming back from that is supposed
to be the worst.
Speaker 1 (00:12):
Well, first of all, can we back up for a second.
Isn't it true everybody everybody has hemorrhoids.
Speaker 3 (00:18):
It seems like they're more common now. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, everybody.
It's just inflammation that people deal with.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
Everybody has hemorrhoids, but not everybody has to deal with
inflamed like when like when somebody goes.
Speaker 4 (00:33):
You got to hit like, oh I had to go
to the doctor.
Speaker 1 (00:35):
I've never gone to the doctor for hemorrhoids, and I've
had hemorrhoids the the But when everybody says I have hemorrhoids,
they're actually wrong because everybody you have hemorrhoids right now?
You mean we have the veins, Yes, that's what it is.
Is it are in hemorrhoids the gorged veins? No, oh,
(00:57):
are in hemorrhoids just the the the.
Speaker 4 (01:00):
Veins right by the anus. But aren't Isn't that what's wrong?
Speaker 5 (01:05):
Sorry? If you could point again, I'm not sure where
the age are.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
Well, I thought it was my armpit.
Speaker 5 (01:11):
And the weirdest thing he didn't just like do the
point from two three feet away?
Speaker 3 (01:16):
Now he got up in there.
Speaker 4 (01:18):
Oh but that's to show where I am. But isn't it?
Speaker 1 (01:23):
Isn't it true that just that those round veins that
are by your anus, those are hemorrhoids.
Speaker 4 (01:31):
It's when they get inflamed.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
And they and they them out and they come out.
Speaker 4 (01:35):
Oh you can have internals.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
Well, yeah, you have internal ones too, but the you
don't You likely wouldn't know you have internal ones. You
know you have external ones.
Speaker 2 (01:42):
Oh wrong?
Speaker 4 (01:43):
What wrong?
Speaker 3 (01:44):
What do you mean?
Speaker 1 (01:46):
Yes, if you if you've got what appears to be
grapes coming out of your ass, you have external but
they're definitely internal hemorrhoids.
Speaker 4 (01:54):
Yeah, oh they're.
Speaker 3 (01:55):
No, I'm saying, like you would, but you would know that,
you would know that if you have the internal internal
ones that are inflamed. That's what I'm saying. I don't
think somebody would know that.
Speaker 4 (02:08):
Oh I think you do. I think you do.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
I've definitely had inflamed. Oh well, let me finish what
I was saying. Let me finish what I was saying
everybody has hemorrhoids. It's just we get them treated when
they're inflamed. So when somebody goes, hey, what do you
go to the doctor for, they'll go, oh, I have hemorrhoids. No,
you have inflamed hemorrhoids. Everybody's got hemorrhoids.
Speaker 4 (02:28):
So I think I'm right on. I think I'm right on.
Speaker 5 (02:30):
When they're in a more natural state, we're still supposed
to call them hemorrhoids. Or do you call them on
the street? Is there a slang word for hemorrhoids?
Speaker 1 (02:44):
I mean, I know what some people would call them,
but I don't think it's common street term.
Speaker 5 (02:49):
What is it?
Speaker 4 (02:49):
Bloody speed bumps?
Speaker 1 (02:50):
Eh?
Speaker 3 (02:51):
Who calls them that?
Speaker 4 (02:53):
Because it slows your turns down? And they use blood
in some cases?
Speaker 5 (02:58):
This says piles?
Speaker 4 (02:59):
Oh no, but piles is medical.
Speaker 3 (03:01):
Okay, then how about toilet balls come on Friday?
Speaker 1 (03:12):
Oh we're already at Friday.
Speaker 4 (03:15):
No, no, no piles. But like doctors would say, you've.
Speaker 3 (03:18):
Got piles, is that multiple?
Speaker 4 (03:20):
Say again, like a pile?
Speaker 3 (03:22):
Is that multiple ones as opposed to like a singular hemorrhoid.
Speaker 4 (03:27):
I don't that, I don't know that. I don't know. No,
here we go.
Speaker 1 (03:34):
One of the most terrory experiences of his life, Jeff said,
was when he saw bloody toilet bowl.
Speaker 4 (03:40):
Been there only I'm reading. No, No, that's just a guy,
the fish fish guy.
Speaker 5 (03:51):
Here it is guy.
Speaker 4 (03:52):
We all have hemorrhoids.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
The term refers to both the anal ailment and the anatomy.
It affects the ocehiny rings of veins that line the
anal canal and swell and expand to prevent stool from
leaking before we're ready to release it.
Speaker 5 (04:10):
Come on Friday, what's wrong?
Speaker 3 (04:15):
You should thank your lucky stars that you have those,
because it's not you wear in a diaper.
Speaker 4 (04:21):
No, no, but that's what they're saying that.
Speaker 1 (04:23):
So these these these veins, they they they get bigger
and smaller and bigger and smaller. It's almost like a
heartbeat down there, bigger and smaller. And that's to either
like bar the door or come on through.
Speaker 5 (04:38):
You're the next contestant.
Speaker 4 (04:41):
But here's what I didn't know. Did you know.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
The one point seven billion dollars a year is spent
on medical hemorrhoid treatments.
Speaker 3 (05:00):
Just like the over the counter creams.
Speaker 4 (05:02):
And I think that's everything.
Speaker 5 (05:04):
Everything Kristen, I am not going to read what you wrote.
I have reposted it, but would you care to share
with Oh? Yes, what you have? You?
Speaker 4 (05:16):
Have you ever had an inflamed hemorrhoids?
Speaker 5 (05:17):
Tyler?
Speaker 4 (05:18):
You have not known pain full?
Speaker 3 (05:21):
They hurt.
Speaker 5 (05:23):
That's not what you wrote. But what what did you write?
Speaker 4 (05:28):
Did she say it?
Speaker 2 (05:29):
Yes?
Speaker 5 (05:29):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (05:30):
What did you write?
Speaker 6 (05:31):
I use tucks? Have you heard of them pads?
Speaker 4 (05:34):
Yeah, it's almost like it's almost like the old ACME pad. Yeah.
I don't use those.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
It's stride X but for your butt, No it is.
Speaker 4 (05:44):
I'm sorry.
Speaker 5 (05:44):
First half of the.
Speaker 7 (05:45):
Sentence I wrote on the X I use tucks to
calm down my hymns. They sit right next to the
to the toilet.
Speaker 4 (05:57):
And they also sit right next to your buttole.
Speaker 6 (06:00):
Yeah, they calmed down.
Speaker 4 (06:02):
Wait, how often do you how often do you are you?
Are you inflame?
Speaker 6 (06:06):
Do you remember when I was got sick on vacation?
Speaker 4 (06:10):
Uh in Mexico?
Speaker 6 (06:13):
Very recent?
Speaker 3 (06:14):
Girl?
Speaker 7 (06:15):
They actually just you went through a couple of tugs. Yes,
I actually told Mike. I'm like, oh my gosh, I
need to order some more tucks.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
The so that was from what see Now a lot
of people think a lot of people think you get
hemorrhoids from pushing.
Speaker 4 (06:28):
That's not always the case.
Speaker 6 (06:29):
Can we cause from stress?
Speaker 4 (06:31):
No it can't. Did you go to the doctor now
you kidding?
Speaker 1 (06:34):
No?
Speaker 4 (06:35):
No, A lot of people know, a lot of people
do well.
Speaker 6 (06:38):
I didn't feel I needed to. I got my tucks.
Speaker 5 (06:41):
But you were in Mexico. So was it bolos del
banos tucos? No, those, it's the toilet balls.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
Hemorrhoids account for four million doctor's office visits and emergency
room visits every year. How bad does your hemorrhoid have
to be to go to the er? If you're bleeding?
People get freaked out by that. They think they have
like colon cancer.
Speaker 4 (07:04):
I definite yes, Kristin.
Speaker 6 (07:06):
One time, my first time at band camp.
Speaker 5 (07:10):
I had a right, why won't you hemorrhoid?
Speaker 6 (07:14):
Android? Hemorrhoid?
Speaker 4 (07:15):
Yes, hemorrhoid whatever.
Speaker 7 (07:17):
So the first time I got one, I was in
high school, my senior year. I was stressing out and
then I freaked out. I screamed at the top of
the stairs.
Speaker 6 (07:25):
I'm like, something's at my butt.
Speaker 4 (07:28):
I don't know what's wrong.
Speaker 7 (07:30):
And my dad came running up because I was like
bloody murdered, sobbing I didn't know what was happening.
Speaker 4 (07:35):
I thought in organ, very concerning an organ was popping.
Speaker 7 (07:38):
So my dad like held back a laugh because he's like, Kristin,
it's just a hemorrhoid.
Speaker 6 (07:45):
I'm like, but what is that? I had no idea
what it was.
Speaker 4 (07:47):
Yeah, it's an inflamed it's an inflamed.
Speaker 1 (07:51):
Vein around your by your by your bung And but
sometimes they get so engorged. Is in gorged the right
word where, Yeah, they get so they'll bleed, And that's
what you're that's what you're saying. Like, I don't I
don't get concerned if I like, if I have if
I have blood in the toilet, I don't get concerned
(08:12):
till day three.
Speaker 5 (08:16):
That seems like it's waiting too long. No, because it's not.
Speaker 1 (08:20):
I don't well, I don't know. I didn't ask, but
I don't get concerned. And like sometimes it's like, oh
my god, did I sit on a knife, Like something
really bad is going on here?
Speaker 6 (08:30):
My goodness, you've never had one tyler.
Speaker 1 (08:34):
In the last you haven't had an inflame one. He
does have hemorrhoids. Everybody has hemorrhoids. That's what holds your poop.
Speaker 5 (08:39):
In the last two minutes. I have not developed. The
people are saying you're wrong, Elliott, that it is not
a hemorrhoid unless it is inflamed.
Speaker 4 (08:48):
Yeah, check the check the check the info.
Speaker 5 (08:51):
We're also being told I know Kristen likes hems, but
some people call him hemish.
Speaker 4 (08:56):
I am, I got a hemmy, got a hemmy?
Speaker 1 (09:03):
Why are so many more people having hemorrhoids? Many of
us are doing our damnness to let hemorrhoids flourish.
Speaker 4 (09:11):
We sit too much, we eat too poorly, we drink too.
Speaker 1 (09:15):
Little water, we work out too hard, we poop too aggressively,
we bedat too ferociously.
Speaker 4 (09:21):
And what is what is? What is the most prevalent one?
When is the.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
Last time anybody, anybody went into the bathroom and sat
down and didn't get on their phone.
Speaker 5 (09:37):
I've done that?
Speaker 4 (09:38):
What sat down and gotten out your phone?
Speaker 5 (09:41):
No, I've definitely gone in there and left the phone
at the computer.
Speaker 4 (09:44):
Okay, when is the last time I'm in poop?
Speaker 7 (09:49):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (09:50):
Okay, I stand to poop.
Speaker 1 (09:56):
I just taught Tyler a good bathroom prank, the never
heard of any now, Okay, I'll get to that later.
Don't throw me off the no, no, no, but they said
because people, more and more people are everybody brings their
phone in there, and so you're sitting there longer and
longer and longer, and you're not even necessarily straining, but
it's just from sitting there.
Speaker 3 (10:17):
It's putting pressure, added pressure exactly.
Speaker 1 (10:21):
And maybe maybe I am wrong, maybe I misread this,
but I thought it was we all have hemorrhoids. We
we we define hemorrhoids wrong.
Speaker 4 (10:30):
We all have hemorrhoids.
Speaker 1 (10:31):
It's when they're inflamed that somebody goes, I have hemorrhoids. No,
you always have hemorrhoids, Like we all have multiple sphincters,
but you only think of the one sphincter.
Speaker 5 (10:43):
Just a simple diagram of a hemorrhoid. It does look painful,
like you don't have to convince me. Oh, I'm telling it.
And and this is not People were wondering if you
were soliciting for photos. You were not.
Speaker 4 (10:59):
No, oh no, no, my god.
Speaker 1 (11:01):
Why are people sending Diane photos? Hey, Diane, check this pile?
Just put piles in the subject line? Did you you
said you got them from childbirth? Were you uncomfortable? Yours
were external and uncomfortable to sit like Jackie.
Speaker 4 (11:18):
Jackie was bad. It was well, don't say that, I
mean she she had piles. Like Jackie sat like.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
This, like leaning over all the way.
Speaker 4 (11:30):
Over and every so often if I got bad, I'd
just pull her up right. But yeah, no, it could
be very painful.
Speaker 5 (11:39):
I'm reading people's stories.
Speaker 4 (11:42):
Did we know that about Kristen? What that she has piles?
Speaker 5 (11:46):
Have you shared with us?
Speaker 8 (11:48):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (11:48):
I didn't think so.
Speaker 1 (11:49):
The oh you know what, but I Diane brought something
up that I wanted to ask about because there's a
new procedure that that it isn't common, but that they
are using.
Speaker 4 (11:58):
Where am I going? Lying seven?
Speaker 1 (12:01):
Hi Elliot the morning, Hey Elliott Piles hotline.
Speaker 4 (12:05):
Yes, who is this? My name is Brandon.
Speaker 2 (12:08):
Hey.
Speaker 4 (12:08):
You had you had you had hemorrhoids.
Speaker 2 (12:11):
Yeah, I actually had the surgery two years.
Speaker 4 (12:13):
Ago, internal or external.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Both two the size of yeah, two the size of
quarters on the inside and one the size of a
golf ball on the outside.
Speaker 1 (12:23):
A golf ball, Oh, my god, golf ball. You couldn't
even get your cheeks to touch.
Speaker 9 (12:29):
Bro.
Speaker 2 (12:29):
When it happened, I was loading up some music equipment
and I was about two and a half hours away
from home. Went to the doctor the next day and
they referred me to the uh to the surgeon. I
went to him after that and he said, emergency surgery.
And let me tell you something, man, for the next
six weeks you are letting go of hot lava and glass.
(12:54):
It is the worst experience that anyone could ever have.
Speaker 4 (12:57):
Did you get RBL?
Speaker 2 (12:58):
Women?
Speaker 4 (12:59):
Did you get rb RBL?
Speaker 10 (13:01):
What?
Speaker 3 (13:01):
What's that?
Speaker 2 (13:02):
Uh?
Speaker 4 (13:02):
No, the rubber band blegation?
Speaker 2 (13:06):
No no, no, no, they went in and they cut
me open. Oh no kidding, and they yeah. And then
what they do is they pack your whole full of
this stuff so that it can like heal up. And
then your first movement is just that. And then after
you do that, if you don't have a hot bath
waiting to jump in, you are in pain for hours.
(13:28):
That's the segment women would rather have.
Speaker 4 (13:31):
Huh that's the bath.
Speaker 3 (13:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
No, sitting in a tub full of hot water as
hot as you could possibly get it, writing in pain.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
So wait a minute, your first poop is all like
packing gauze and stuff.
Speaker 5 (13:46):
No it and and that's what I thought too, but
it wasn't.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
It was like this little string thing that just came
right on out.
Speaker 1 (13:54):
So wait, could you like, obviously you had pain on
the externals on the could you did you have pain
from internals?
Speaker 10 (14:02):
Dude?
Speaker 2 (14:02):
It was pain from the back of my knees all
the way up to my lower back.
Speaker 4 (14:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:07):
I couldn't tell what it was.
Speaker 4 (14:09):
I believe that, and I do it.
Speaker 1 (14:11):
Do you believe that that there is there is pain
that comes along with internal hemorrhoids as well as obviously
external hemorrhoids.
Speaker 5 (14:18):
Oh yeah, oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:20):
I mean I'd been dealing with them for a couple
of years and I guess, you know, moving that that
equipment and stuff, you know, it just went it went
ahead and said, hey, guess what I'm here now you
gotta get rid of me.
Speaker 4 (14:30):
Listen.
Speaker 1 (14:30):
I remember, like Kristin, I remember having piles in high school,
and before you know what they are, you just think
like there's like a bubble back there.
Speaker 4 (14:40):
I remember, No, I'm being serious.
Speaker 1 (14:41):
I remember trying to push it back in, thinking like
something had come out and I was pushing it back in,
but you can't like it's out, like it's not going
back in.
Speaker 2 (14:51):
Yeah, and like the first parts of having the hemorrhoids,
you can actually push them back in. Throw some cream
and some tucks, in and then you know, you're really
for about a day or two and then let's just
say you eat something that doesn't agree with you, it's
back there you go. Yeah, and in my doctor he
told me after I got like my my my normal doctor,
(15:11):
my PCP, he was like, I've had pregnant women come
in and say they would rather have three babies with
no drugs than do that surgery again.
Speaker 1 (15:17):
Wow, wow, that'll tell Yeah, it's bad, dog, it's really bad.
Speaker 4 (15:22):
Interesting. Hey, I appreciate the phone call. Thank you.
Speaker 5 (15:25):
Now when you asked him about RB rubber band ligation,
because he had it a while ago, it sounds like
that may be the older technique.
Speaker 4 (15:35):
Which one the rubber band legation. No, I think that
is the most common. Oh, don't think it.
Speaker 5 (15:41):
But is it the new way?
Speaker 3 (15:42):
Yeah, you said there was something new.
Speaker 1 (15:43):
No, I don't think so. I don't think so. So
rubber band ligation is exactly what you think it is.
You got a big you got a big, big old
veins coming out of your tushy, and they just tie
it off with a rubber.
Speaker 5 (15:54):
Band really tight, and they give it like a skin
tag exactly, and then it loses its blood flow and
it goes away, right, yeah.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
It falls it falls off, and then you gotta then
you gotta a butt grape inside your pants.
Speaker 4 (16:06):
By the way, can I can I tangent for one second?
Speaker 5 (16:09):
Well, he didn't want to tangent?
Speaker 4 (16:10):
Okay, then Diane, will you write down skin.
Speaker 5 (16:12):
Tagged and bathroom?
Speaker 4 (16:15):
And wait? What was bathroom?
Speaker 2 (16:16):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (16:17):
Bathroom prank?
Speaker 1 (16:18):
Yes, no, I think there is. I'm looking there. Hemorrhoid
a deck toomies in which hemorrhoids are excised, or in
a stapled hemorrhoid ipoxy staple to choke their blood supply.
(16:44):
That's what that guy had. But that's not the new procedure,
is it. Where am I going? Kristen line four?
Speaker 4 (16:52):
Hi Elliott the morning he got the roids?
Speaker 9 (16:59):
Oh but yeah, yeah, I had him a couple of
years ago. I had the rubber band ligation.
Speaker 4 (17:04):
Now did the rubber band hurt?
Speaker 9 (17:07):
Yeah? So he explained it to me that there's gonna
be a little bit of pressure, and then there was
a lot of pressure. Even walking out of the doctor's office,
I thought I was gonna crap my pants for two days.
Speaker 4 (17:20):
I would be afraid.
Speaker 1 (17:22):
I would be afraid that if I had rubber bands
like I would be afraid.
Speaker 4 (17:27):
I would be afraid to go.
Speaker 9 (17:30):
Yeah, so yeah, it was a little uncomfortable after that happened.
And then they're supposed to die off, because I had
three of them rubber banded, and then they die off
at some point when you're go into the bathroom a
couple of days later, it's like it's like a bloody.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
Mess, right right, Yeah, painful though painful.
Speaker 9 (17:51):
Yes, yeah, that was the only reason. I probably had
it for a couple of years, and that just got
worse over time.
Speaker 1 (17:56):
They said a lot of time, well, you know what
a lot of people find out that they need hemorrhoid
treatment is from colonoscopies. So they'll go in and then
it'll be like, hey, you need to get this looked at.
And then there are people like you're right once like
there are people who have them and then just go like, hey,
it's a little bit painful, but I can deal with it.
And then next thing you know, like you're you're you're
(18:18):
essentially at pimple popper going yeah, I've had this thing
for five years, and they're amazed at the site where
yours internal or external? I I three internal and you
were able to tell internal I almost feel like internal
could be worse in that you there's no like putting
cream on or tucks.
Speaker 9 (18:39):
Well, I was freaking out because I thought there was
something else wrong because I'm a hypochondriac.
Speaker 4 (18:44):
Right, and you have a lot of blood. Yeah, blood
in your stool?
Speaker 10 (18:46):
Yeah?
Speaker 9 (18:47):
Blood yeah, get's butt and a stool at Yeah. And
when I finally went to the doctus, like, he laughed,
is there you just got internal hemorrhoids? And then after
the rubber band likeation was done, as I actually just
level with.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
Them, Hey, can I ask you this? How were they
if yours were internal? How were they able to rubber
band them?
Speaker 9 (19:06):
So if they shoved this like scope up your rectum
and it's like a double scope thing. I didn't really
see what he was doing. I googled it later, right,
and then he goes in and I guess they just
put a thing over like I guess, over the hemorrhoid
and it puts a rubber band around it. And then
they shove a heat gun up there through the hole
to like heat it up, so like speeds up the process.
Speaker 2 (19:30):
So is this horrible?
Speaker 9 (19:31):
Like it just it was horrible, horrible?
Speaker 5 (19:35):
How long are you off work?
Speaker 4 (19:37):
Then? Oh, that's a good question.
Speaker 9 (19:38):
Hell long, you know, like a week, like a week.
I was able to go back to work after a week.
Speaker 4 (19:43):
They said, what a lot of people, it's twenty days.
Speaker 3 (19:45):
What did you tell people at work that you had done?
Were you honest?
Speaker 9 (19:49):
So I told everybody exactly. I told everybody exactly what happened.
I worked with a group of strange people.
Speaker 4 (19:54):
Okay, I'd been like, oh my god, brain cancer.
Speaker 9 (20:00):
Yeah, they fixed it in a week. That's what I
thought I had.
Speaker 1 (20:04):
They do say that, they do say that in some
cases you could be out for twenty days.
Speaker 4 (20:09):
Oh my god, because of how bad.
Speaker 1 (20:11):
Now, maybe that is like that the other guy had
the like the surgery was was twenty days.
Speaker 9 (20:17):
Surgery, even the doctor because we were talking about that surgery,
and that sounds like way worse. And I think that's
for like more like bigger hemorrhoids, I guess because mine
weren't like super big. The way they explained that it
was enough to bother me.
Speaker 1 (20:31):
Interesting, all right, very good, very good, Thank you sir,
Thank you, my friend. A new procedure that is favored
is trans anal hemorrhoidal d arterialization.
Speaker 3 (20:46):
Is there a fun acronym for that.
Speaker 4 (20:48):
Not yet, okay.
Speaker 1 (20:50):
That is where a device is inserted into the anus
to locate the artery feeding blood to your hemorrhoids.
Speaker 4 (20:57):
So think about it.
Speaker 1 (20:58):
If you're getting the rubber band and they're chopping off
the hemorrhoid, the surgery, they're going in and they're dealing
with the actual hemorrhoid, the transanal hemorrhoidal dearter realization.
Speaker 5 (21:12):
We could call it like THHD or something.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
Okay, the THHD. Why why why are we calling it THHD.
Speaker 4 (21:19):
You don't like hearing transanal.
Speaker 5 (21:20):
It's a mouthful, yeah, it's a but holefull.
Speaker 4 (21:26):
No, So they want to go in and go hey,
instead of.
Speaker 1 (21:29):
Trying to deal with the rubber band, let's go to
the water source, in this case, the blood source, and
let's go shut that supply down so it doesn't just
keep feeding blood into the hemorrhoids. A new procedure is
the THHD, in which a device is inserted into the
(21:50):
anus to locate the artery feeding blood to your hemorrhoids,
but for a second, device is inserted to tie that
are artery off with sutures. The doctor goes on and says,
I've compared traditional hemorrhoid ectomy to THHD in The return
to work rate was twenty days for the first one.
(22:12):
Like where they could go in and like that guy said,
you're like crapping gauze.
Speaker 4 (22:17):
Three days with THHD.
Speaker 5 (22:18):
Wow, wow, three days and you're fine.
Speaker 1 (22:22):
Yeah, because now you've you've walled off the blood.
Speaker 5 (22:27):
It's pretty good. Get to know. Why are you looking
over there? Yeah? You want Christen to get this done?
Oh wait, what is this? S I'm reading.
Speaker 4 (22:40):
Hold line eight?
Speaker 5 (22:42):
Go ahead, you need an anal lift, then pardon me
because it can leave deflated skin dangling from the anus,
causing cleanliness issues and irritation. You need to have an
anal left. I can continue if you'd like.
Speaker 4 (23:07):
My butthole looks like the catwoman.
Speaker 5 (23:11):
Wilderstein woman loved ask a Chevy Chase face if they
do anal lifts. This doctor who was the you went
to see Megan? Megan a Megan, can you do my butt?
This one uses a barbed tie common with Heber get
(23:31):
your Bard tie common with Korean facelifts. He'll probably remind
us about a war. Uh the never forget. These sutures
have tiny hooks on them with a one way spike,
so that when the hook goes in, it won't come out.
I can use that to decrease your prolapsed skin. Uh,
(23:52):
sometimes insurance companies. I learned this with my laser.
Speaker 3 (23:56):
This is elective, Yes, denies it because it's cosmetic.
Speaker 5 (24:01):
Well, no, it's too experimental.
Speaker 4 (24:02):
Oh now I'll tell you what I'll do.
Speaker 2 (24:05):
I will.
Speaker 5 (24:06):
Life without this.
Speaker 1 (24:08):
I will stand up and I will show Aaron what
I have going on and say, excuse me, mister Hyland,
is this is this elective or not?
Speaker 4 (24:18):
Does yours droop like this?
Speaker 5 (24:20):
You with your butt lift, Dane, You can't live a
normal life if you're struggling with deflated anus skin that dangles.
It says cleanliness issues and irritation.
Speaker 3 (24:31):
What are you doing?
Speaker 1 (24:32):
I'm just dragging this deflated skin around again?
Speaker 9 (24:38):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (24:38):
Cleanliness?
Speaker 1 (24:39):
So is it like like I'm uncircumcised where that gets dirty?
Speaker 2 (24:44):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (24:44):
You're probably right, same thing, dude. You you would.
Speaker 1 (24:49):
Always look like you streaked your pants just because of
that skin.
Speaker 5 (24:54):
I don't know if that's true.
Speaker 4 (24:57):
Well, what else are you storing back there? You're storing pooh?
Speaker 5 (25:01):
If but the skin is it's it's hanging out, Yes,
just here for the party.
Speaker 4 (25:08):
Right up against my underwear, right, but.
Speaker 5 (25:11):
This isn't going into your bowels.
Speaker 4 (25:13):
But my bowels are passing it.
Speaker 5 (25:15):
Well, no, you'd have to then clean. I hope you're
doing that anyway after you go to the bathroom.
Speaker 1 (25:20):
Fifty of the time I feel like I feel like
I'm returning all way too often.
Speaker 4 (25:27):
Mine eight. Hi Elliott the morning? What's wrong?
Speaker 8 (25:30):
Diane?
Speaker 4 (25:31):
Hi Elliott the morning?
Speaker 1 (25:33):
Hello?
Speaker 9 (25:34):
Hi?
Speaker 4 (25:34):
Who's this?
Speaker 11 (25:36):
This is Nicole.
Speaker 4 (25:38):
You have hemorrhoids?
Speaker 10 (25:41):
Yes, sir, I know you.
Speaker 11 (25:43):
Have a big kyle and it's internal sir.
Speaker 4 (25:47):
Wait do you have Do you have that right now?
Speaker 2 (25:52):
Yes?
Speaker 4 (25:59):
Hey do you know? Do you know how you got it?
Speaker 1 (26:05):
No?
Speaker 11 (26:05):
Actually I don't. I actually went in for a colonostrophy
because I was having problems and with my stomach and
that's when they found it. So, uh doubt that I
have him worried. Yeah, or and so I actually go
to the stomach doctor of this week, so and and
(26:27):
and like I'm in pain? So basically, are.
Speaker 9 (26:30):
You in pain?
Speaker 1 (26:30):
Can I can I ask you this? Are you in pain?
Are you in pain sitting? Or like you have stomach pain?
Speaker 5 (26:38):
Uh?
Speaker 10 (26:39):
In pain sitting?
Speaker 5 (26:40):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (26:40):
Yeah, a little sensitive back there?
Speaker 1 (26:42):
Hey, what is the did you have did you have
blood in your stool?
Speaker 10 (26:47):
Yeah, ye, yeah, one one the school.
Speaker 11 (26:52):
And I don't know if anybody had mentioned, but if
you don't take care of this properly and have them removed,
they can actually grow and hang outside your butt.
Speaker 4 (27:04):
Yes, those are the.
Speaker 10 (27:07):
Again, because it could they I know because I know
somebody who had you know, like I said, they didn't
take care of it and they didn't go to the
doctor or whatever, and it was like rolling out their butt.
Speaker 11 (27:22):
So, like I said, because it was internal.
Speaker 1 (27:24):
Right, but I think those are external hemorrhoids like that.
Speaker 4 (27:28):
That's pretty common. That's pretty common, right.
Speaker 11 (27:32):
And I'll just rot if you don't take care of it.
And I mean I've tried preparation in each work.
Speaker 4 (27:39):
That don't work.
Speaker 5 (27:40):
Rookies, Yeah no, but trust me, it does.
Speaker 10 (27:44):
It does.
Speaker 11 (27:45):
It does help it like for maybe like a day,
but it don't go away.
Speaker 1 (27:50):
Usually no, honestly, And usually like it's until you wake
up and get going and then the body like you're walking,
and what happens when you walk, Your legs go back
and for it, Well so does your ass.
Speaker 4 (28:00):
So yeah, then you're thank you.
Speaker 5 (28:04):
So you have to crab walk everywhere usually you only
do it to get the stall right.
Speaker 4 (28:10):
No, but I mean.
Speaker 11 (28:11):
No seriously, you know, like I said, if you don't
take care of it, then you know you you are
going to suffer. I mean I've been suffering for I
don't know, uh, maybe a couple of years.
Speaker 10 (28:25):
So a couple of.
Speaker 4 (28:26):
Years, Honey, you've waited too long.
Speaker 10 (28:30):
What I see a doctor?
Speaker 11 (28:32):
So I mean, but still, I mean, I'm gonna I'm
going to have it removed.
Speaker 4 (28:36):
Uh do you know if there are they doing?
Speaker 1 (28:38):
Are they doing rubber band ligation or are you going
to try this new THHD?
Speaker 10 (28:43):
I'm not even sure.
Speaker 11 (28:44):
I won't even know until Thursday, so when I go
to see her.
Speaker 4 (28:48):
So, hey, so Thursday you'll be at the doctor.
Speaker 1 (28:51):
Do you want to come to six Flags on Friday?
Speaker 9 (28:58):
No?
Speaker 1 (28:59):
Seriously, yeah, being serious, I'll give you passage to join.
Speaker 4 (29:02):
Us in six Flags. All right, that's cool, perfect, all right?
Speaker 1 (29:07):
Hold on one second, Hold on one second. I can't
wait to watch you ride a roller coaster.
Speaker 4 (29:12):
Hold on one second.
Speaker 2 (29:13):
Ploor.
Speaker 5 (29:16):
Oh, I thought that's face was reserved for Nancy. What's
that the wave pool?
Speaker 10 (29:24):
The Oh?
Speaker 4 (29:25):
I'll be with Nancy.
Speaker 1 (29:26):
Yeah, no, she's got to get on the roller coasters.
Speaker 5 (29:32):
Because this morning you said that Nancy had to think
about where she's going to lukie in the wave pool exactly,
no before or after.
Speaker 1 (29:46):
Let me grab line three, hi Elliet in the morning.
Definitely both internal and external, right.
Speaker 5 (29:59):
U?
Speaker 4 (30:00):
Yeah? Hello, Yeah, you sound like you got a lot
going on.
Speaker 8 (30:06):
No, I just switched off my blue tooth. I actually
had had a surgery about ten years ago for a
fisher and I told him hemorrhoids, and then he decided
he wasn't going to get rid of the hemorrhoids because
he's conservative. And then a week later I ended up
back in the hospital for a second surgery to have
everything taken out again.
Speaker 1 (30:24):
Why did he not want to do the surgery for
the for the hemorrhoids.
Speaker 8 (30:29):
Because he was on the conservative side. But then he
sent me the bill for the second surgery, and I
told him, if he would have spent it the first
time correctly, he wouldn't be sending me a bill for
the second one. And I never heard from him again.
Speaker 4 (30:40):
But wait, are there are there people that are opposed?
Speaker 1 (30:43):
Like are there people that doctors like I don't I
don't understand that.
Speaker 5 (30:46):
Like doctors that immediately don't go to surgery they body
heeled thy self type thing or conservative like no butt stuff.
Speaker 8 (30:54):
Well, no, he had to fix the fissure, but he
didn't want to do too much.
Speaker 1 (30:58):
At once. They thought it was oh okay, gotcha right,
So so yeah, he wanted to treat.
Speaker 4 (31:02):
He wanted to treat the lake and not the stream, gotcha.
Speaker 8 (31:06):
Yeah, but the stream of what ended up being uh
an Epen River
You've had hemorrhoids during childbirth, right, yep? Did you have
to get them operated on?
Speaker 2 (00:05):
No?
Speaker 3 (00:06):
Thankfully not. They just went back down because I've heard
that that surgery we're coming back from that is supposed
to be the worst.
Speaker 1 (00:12):
Well, first of all, can we back up for a second.
Isn't it true everybody everybody has hemorrhoids.
Speaker 3 (00:18):
It seems like they're more common now. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, everybody.
It's just inflammation that people deal with.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
Everybody has hemorrhoids, but not everybody has to deal with
inflamed like when like when somebody goes.
Speaker 4 (00:33):
You got to hit like, oh I had to go
to the doctor.
Speaker 1 (00:35):
I've never gone to the doctor for hemorrhoids, and I've
had hemorrhoids the the But when everybody says I have hemorrhoids,
they're actually wrong because everybody you have hemorrhoids right now?
You mean we have the veins, Yes, that's what it is.
Is it are in hemorrhoids the gorged veins? No, oh,
(00:57):
are in hemorrhoids just the the the.
Speaker 4 (01:00):
Veins right by the anus. But aren't Isn't that what's wrong?
Speaker 5 (01:05):
Sorry? If you could point again, I'm not sure where
the age are.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
Well, I thought it was my armpit.
Speaker 5 (01:11):
And the weirdest thing he didn't just like do the
point from two three feet away?
Speaker 3 (01:16):
Now he got up in there.
Speaker 4 (01:18):
Oh but that's to show where I am. But isn't it?
Speaker 1 (01:23):
Isn't it true that just that those round veins that
are by your anus, those are hemorrhoids.
Speaker 4 (01:31):
It's when they get inflamed.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
And they and they them out and they come out.
Speaker 4 (01:35):
Oh you can have internals.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
Well, yeah, you have internal ones too, but the you
don't You likely wouldn't know you have internal ones. You
know you have external ones.
Speaker 2 (01:42):
Oh wrong?
Speaker 4 (01:43):
What wrong?
Speaker 3 (01:44):
What do you mean?
Speaker 1 (01:46):
Yes, if you if you've got what appears to be
grapes coming out of your ass, you have external but
they're definitely internal hemorrhoids.
Speaker 4 (01:54):
Yeah, oh they're.
Speaker 3 (01:55):
No, I'm saying, like you would, but you would know that,
you would know that if you have the internal internal
ones that are inflamed. That's what I'm saying. I don't
think somebody would know that.
Speaker 4 (02:08):
Oh I think you do. I think you do.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
I've definitely had inflamed. Oh well, let me finish what
I was saying. Let me finish what I was saying
everybody has hemorrhoids. It's just we get them treated when
they're inflamed. So when somebody goes, hey, what do you
go to the doctor for, they'll go, oh, I have hemorrhoids. No,
you have inflamed hemorrhoids. Everybody's got hemorrhoids.
Speaker 4 (02:28):
So I think I'm right on. I think I'm right on.
Speaker 5 (02:30):
When they're in a more natural state, we're still supposed
to call them hemorrhoids. Or do you call them on
the street? Is there a slang word for hemorrhoids?
Speaker 1 (02:44):
I mean, I know what some people would call them,
but I don't think it's common street term.
Speaker 5 (02:49):
What is it?
Speaker 4 (02:49):
Bloody speed bumps?
Speaker 1 (02:50):
Eh?
Speaker 3 (02:51):
Who calls them that?
Speaker 4 (02:53):
Because it slows your turns down? And they use blood
in some cases?
Speaker 5 (02:58):
This says piles?
Speaker 4 (02:59):
Oh no, but piles is medical.
Speaker 3 (03:01):
Okay, then how about toilet balls come on Friday?
Speaker 1 (03:12):
Oh we're already at Friday.
Speaker 4 (03:15):
No, no, no piles. But like doctors would say, you've.
Speaker 3 (03:18):
Got piles, is that multiple?
Speaker 4 (03:20):
Say again, like a pile?
Speaker 3 (03:22):
Is that multiple ones as opposed to like a singular hemorrhoid.
Speaker 4 (03:27):
I don't that, I don't know that. I don't know. No,
here we go.
Speaker 1 (03:34):
One of the most terrory experiences of his life, Jeff said,
was when he saw bloody toilet bowl.
Speaker 4 (03:40):
Been there only I'm reading. No, No, that's just a guy,
the fish fish guy.
Speaker 5 (03:51):
Here it is guy.
Speaker 4 (03:52):
We all have hemorrhoids.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
The term refers to both the anal ailment and the anatomy.
It affects the ocehiny rings of veins that line the
anal canal and swell and expand to prevent stool from
leaking before we're ready to release it.
Speaker 5 (04:10):
Come on Friday, what's wrong?
Speaker 3 (04:15):
You should thank your lucky stars that you have those,
because it's not you wear in a diaper.
Speaker 4 (04:21):
No, no, but that's what they're saying that.
Speaker 1 (04:23):
So these these these veins, they they they get bigger
and smaller and bigger and smaller. It's almost like a
heartbeat down there, bigger and smaller. And that's to either
like bar the door or come on through.
Speaker 5 (04:38):
You're the next contestant.
Speaker 4 (04:41):
But here's what I didn't know. Did you know.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
The one point seven billion dollars a year is spent
on medical hemorrhoid treatments.
Speaker 3 (05:00):
Just like the over the counter creams.
Speaker 4 (05:02):
And I think that's everything.
Speaker 5 (05:04):
Everything Kristen, I am not going to read what you wrote.
I have reposted it, but would you care to share
with Oh? Yes, what you have? You?
Speaker 4 (05:16):
Have you ever had an inflamed hemorrhoids?
Speaker 5 (05:17):
Tyler?
Speaker 4 (05:18):
You have not known pain full?
Speaker 3 (05:21):
They hurt.
Speaker 5 (05:23):
That's not what you wrote. But what what did you write?
Speaker 4 (05:28):
Did she say it?
Speaker 2 (05:29):
Yes?
Speaker 5 (05:29):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (05:30):
What did you write?
Speaker 6 (05:31):
I use tucks? Have you heard of them pads?
Speaker 4 (05:34):
Yeah, it's almost like it's almost like the old ACME pad. Yeah.
I don't use those.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
It's stride X but for your butt, No it is.
Speaker 4 (05:44):
I'm sorry.
Speaker 5 (05:44):
First half of the.
Speaker 7 (05:45):
Sentence I wrote on the X I use tucks to
calm down my hymns. They sit right next to the
to the toilet.
Speaker 4 (05:57):
And they also sit right next to your buttole.
Speaker 6 (06:00):
Yeah, they calmed down.
Speaker 4 (06:02):
Wait, how often do you how often do you are you?
Are you inflame?
Speaker 6 (06:06):
Do you remember when I was got sick on vacation?
Speaker 4 (06:10):
Uh in Mexico?
Speaker 6 (06:13):
Very recent?
Speaker 3 (06:14):
Girl?
Speaker 7 (06:15):
They actually just you went through a couple of tugs. Yes,
I actually told Mike. I'm like, oh my gosh, I
need to order some more tucks.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
The so that was from what see Now a lot
of people think a lot of people think you get
hemorrhoids from pushing.
Speaker 4 (06:28):
That's not always the case.
Speaker 6 (06:29):
Can we cause from stress?
Speaker 4 (06:31):
No it can't. Did you go to the doctor now
you kidding?
Speaker 1 (06:34):
No?
Speaker 4 (06:35):
No, A lot of people know, a lot of people
do well.
Speaker 6 (06:38):
I didn't feel I needed to. I got my tucks.
Speaker 5 (06:41):
But you were in Mexico. So was it bolos del
banos tucos? No, those, it's the toilet balls.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
Hemorrhoids account for four million doctor's office visits and emergency
room visits every year. How bad does your hemorrhoid have
to be to go to the er? If you're bleeding?
People get freaked out by that. They think they have
like colon cancer.
Speaker 4 (07:04):
I definite yes, Kristin.
Speaker 6 (07:06):
One time, my first time at band camp.
Speaker 5 (07:10):
I had a right, why won't you hemorrhoid?
Speaker 6 (07:14):
Android? Hemorrhoid?
Speaker 4 (07:15):
Yes, hemorrhoid whatever.
Speaker 7 (07:17):
So the first time I got one, I was in
high school, my senior year. I was stressing out and
then I freaked out. I screamed at the top of
the stairs.
Speaker 6 (07:25):
I'm like, something's at my butt.
Speaker 4 (07:28):
I don't know what's wrong.
Speaker 7 (07:30):
And my dad came running up because I was like
bloody murdered, sobbing I didn't know what was happening.
Speaker 4 (07:35):
I thought in organ, very concerning an organ was popping.
Speaker 7 (07:38):
So my dad like held back a laugh because he's like, Kristin,
it's just a hemorrhoid.
Speaker 6 (07:45):
I'm like, but what is that? I had no idea
what it was.
Speaker 4 (07:47):
Yeah, it's an inflamed it's an inflamed.
Speaker 1 (07:51):
Vein around your by your by your bung And but
sometimes they get so engorged. Is in gorged the right
word where, Yeah, they get so they'll bleed, And that's
what you're that's what you're saying. Like, I don't I
don't get concerned if I like, if I have if
I have blood in the toilet, I don't get concerned
(08:12):
till day three.
Speaker 5 (08:16):
That seems like it's waiting too long. No, because it's not.
Speaker 1 (08:20):
I don't well, I don't know. I didn't ask, but
I don't get concerned. And like sometimes it's like, oh
my god, did I sit on a knife, Like something
really bad is going on here?
Speaker 6 (08:30):
My goodness, you've never had one tyler.
Speaker 1 (08:34):
In the last you haven't had an inflame one. He
does have hemorrhoids. Everybody has hemorrhoids. That's what holds your poop.
Speaker 5 (08:39):
In the last two minutes. I have not developed. The
people are saying you're wrong, Elliott, that it is not
a hemorrhoid unless it is inflamed.
Speaker 4 (08:48):
Yeah, check the check the check the info.
Speaker 5 (08:51):
We're also being told I know Kristen likes hems, but
some people call him hemish.
Speaker 4 (08:56):
I am, I got a hemmy, got a hemmy?
Speaker 1 (09:03):
Why are so many more people having hemorrhoids? Many of
us are doing our damnness to let hemorrhoids flourish.
Speaker 4 (09:11):
We sit too much, we eat too poorly, we drink too.
Speaker 1 (09:15):
Little water, we work out too hard, we poop too aggressively,
we bedat too ferociously.
Speaker 4 (09:21):
And what is what is? What is the most prevalent one?
When is the.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
Last time anybody, anybody went into the bathroom and sat
down and didn't get on their phone.
Speaker 5 (09:37):
I've done that?
Speaker 4 (09:38):
What sat down and gotten out your phone?
Speaker 5 (09:41):
No, I've definitely gone in there and left the phone
at the computer.
Speaker 4 (09:44):
Okay, when is the last time I'm in poop?
Speaker 7 (09:49):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (09:50):
Okay, I stand to poop.
Speaker 1 (09:56):
I just taught Tyler a good bathroom prank, the never
heard of any now, Okay, I'll get to that later.
Don't throw me off the no, no, no, but they said
because people, more and more people are everybody brings their
phone in there, and so you're sitting there longer and
longer and longer, and you're not even necessarily straining, but
it's just from sitting there.
Speaker 3 (10:17):
It's putting pressure, added pressure exactly.
Speaker 1 (10:21):
And maybe maybe I am wrong, maybe I misread this,
but I thought it was we all have hemorrhoids. We
we we define hemorrhoids wrong.
Speaker 4 (10:30):
We all have hemorrhoids.
Speaker 1 (10:31):
It's when they're inflamed that somebody goes, I have hemorrhoids. No,
you always have hemorrhoids, Like we all have multiple sphincters,
but you only think of the one sphincter.
Speaker 5 (10:43):
Just a simple diagram of a hemorrhoid. It does look painful,
like you don't have to convince me. Oh, I'm telling it.
And and this is not People were wondering if you
were soliciting for photos. You were not.
Speaker 4 (10:59):
No, oh no, no, my god.
Speaker 1 (11:01):
Why are people sending Diane photos? Hey, Diane, check this pile?
Just put piles in the subject line? Did you you
said you got them from childbirth? Were you uncomfortable? Yours
were external and uncomfortable to sit like Jackie.
Speaker 4 (11:18):
Jackie was bad. It was well, don't say that, I
mean she she had piles. Like Jackie sat like.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
This, like leaning over all the way.
Speaker 4 (11:30):
Over and every so often if I got bad, I'd
just pull her up right. But yeah, no, it could
be very painful.
Speaker 5 (11:39):
I'm reading people's stories.
Speaker 4 (11:42):
Did we know that about Kristen? What that she has piles?
Speaker 5 (11:46):
Have you shared with us?
Speaker 8 (11:48):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (11:48):
I didn't think so.
Speaker 1 (11:49):
The oh you know what, but I Diane brought something
up that I wanted to ask about because there's a
new procedure that that it isn't common, but that they
are using.
Speaker 4 (11:58):
Where am I going? Lying seven?
Speaker 1 (12:01):
Hi Elliot the morning, Hey Elliott Piles hotline.
Speaker 4 (12:05):
Yes, who is this? My name is Brandon.
Speaker 2 (12:08):
Hey.
Speaker 4 (12:08):
You had you had you had hemorrhoids.
Speaker 2 (12:11):
Yeah, I actually had the surgery two years.
Speaker 4 (12:13):
Ago, internal or external.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Both two the size of yeah, two the size of
quarters on the inside and one the size of a
golf ball on the outside.
Speaker 1 (12:23):
A golf ball, Oh, my god, golf ball. You couldn't
even get your cheeks to touch.
Speaker 9 (12:29):
Bro.
Speaker 2 (12:29):
When it happened, I was loading up some music equipment
and I was about two and a half hours away
from home. Went to the doctor the next day and
they referred me to the uh to the surgeon. I
went to him after that and he said, emergency surgery.
And let me tell you something, man, for the next
six weeks you are letting go of hot lava and glass.
(12:54):
It is the worst experience that anyone could ever have.
Speaker 4 (12:57):
Did you get RBL?
Speaker 2 (12:58):
Women?
Speaker 4 (12:59):
Did you get rb RBL?
Speaker 10 (13:01):
What?
Speaker 3 (13:01):
What's that?
Speaker 2 (13:02):
Uh?
Speaker 4 (13:02):
No, the rubber band blegation?
Speaker 2 (13:06):
No no, no, no, they went in and they cut
me open. Oh no kidding, and they yeah. And then
what they do is they pack your whole full of
this stuff so that it can like heal up. And
then your first movement is just that. And then after
you do that, if you don't have a hot bath
waiting to jump in, you are in pain for hours.
(13:28):
That's the segment women would rather have.
Speaker 4 (13:31):
Huh that's the bath.
Speaker 3 (13:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
No, sitting in a tub full of hot water as
hot as you could possibly get it, writing in pain.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
So wait a minute, your first poop is all like
packing gauze and stuff.
Speaker 5 (13:46):
No it and and that's what I thought too, but
it wasn't.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
It was like this little string thing that just came
right on out.
Speaker 1 (13:54):
So wait, could you like, obviously you had pain on
the externals on the could you did you have pain
from internals?
Speaker 10 (14:02):
Dude?
Speaker 2 (14:02):
It was pain from the back of my knees all
the way up to my lower back.
Speaker 4 (14:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:07):
I couldn't tell what it was.
Speaker 4 (14:09):
I believe that, and I do it.
Speaker 1 (14:11):
Do you believe that that there is there is pain
that comes along with internal hemorrhoids as well as obviously
external hemorrhoids.
Speaker 5 (14:18):
Oh yeah, oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:20):
I mean I'd been dealing with them for a couple
of years and I guess, you know, moving that that
equipment and stuff, you know, it just went it went
ahead and said, hey, guess what I'm here now you
gotta get rid of me.
Speaker 4 (14:30):
Listen.
Speaker 1 (14:30):
I remember, like Kristin, I remember having piles in high school,
and before you know what they are, you just think
like there's like a bubble back there.
Speaker 4 (14:40):
I remember, No, I'm being serious.
Speaker 1 (14:41):
I remember trying to push it back in, thinking like
something had come out and I was pushing it back in,
but you can't like it's out, like it's not going
back in.
Speaker 2 (14:51):
Yeah, and like the first parts of having the hemorrhoids,
you can actually push them back in. Throw some cream
and some tucks, in and then you know, you're really
for about a day or two and then let's just
say you eat something that doesn't agree with you, it's
back there you go. Yeah, and in my doctor he
told me after I got like my my my normal doctor,
(15:11):
my PCP, he was like, I've had pregnant women come
in and say they would rather have three babies with
no drugs than do that surgery again.
Speaker 1 (15:17):
Wow, wow, that'll tell Yeah, it's bad, dog, it's really bad.
Speaker 4 (15:22):
Interesting. Hey, I appreciate the phone call. Thank you.
Speaker 5 (15:25):
Now when you asked him about RB rubber band ligation,
because he had it a while ago, it sounds like
that may be the older technique.
Speaker 4 (15:35):
Which one the rubber band legation. No, I think that
is the most common. Oh, don't think it.
Speaker 5 (15:41):
But is it the new way?
Speaker 3 (15:42):
Yeah, you said there was something new.
Speaker 1 (15:43):
No, I don't think so. I don't think so. So
rubber band ligation is exactly what you think it is.
You got a big you got a big, big old
veins coming out of your tushy, and they just tie
it off with a rubber.
Speaker 5 (15:54):
Band really tight, and they give it like a skin
tag exactly, and then it loses its blood flow and
it goes away, right, yeah.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
It falls it falls off, and then you gotta then
you gotta a butt grape inside your pants.
Speaker 4 (16:06):
By the way, can I can I tangent for one second?
Speaker 5 (16:09):
Well, he didn't want to tangent?
Speaker 4 (16:10):
Okay, then Diane, will you write down skin.
Speaker 5 (16:12):
Tagged and bathroom?
Speaker 4 (16:15):
And wait? What was bathroom?
Speaker 2 (16:16):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (16:17):
Bathroom prank?
Speaker 1 (16:18):
Yes, no, I think there is. I'm looking there. Hemorrhoid
a deck toomies in which hemorrhoids are excised, or in
a stapled hemorrhoid ipoxy staple to choke their blood supply.
(16:44):
That's what that guy had. But that's not the new procedure,
is it. Where am I going? Kristen line four?
Speaker 4 (16:52):
Hi Elliott the morning he got the roids?
Speaker 9 (16:59):
Oh but yeah, yeah, I had him a couple of
years ago. I had the rubber band ligation.
Speaker 4 (17:04):
Now did the rubber band hurt?
Speaker 9 (17:07):
Yeah? So he explained it to me that there's gonna
be a little bit of pressure, and then there was
a lot of pressure. Even walking out of the doctor's office,
I thought I was gonna crap my pants for two days.
Speaker 4 (17:20):
I would be afraid.
Speaker 1 (17:22):
I would be afraid that if I had rubber bands
like I would be afraid.
Speaker 4 (17:27):
I would be afraid to go.
Speaker 9 (17:30):
Yeah, so yeah, it was a little uncomfortable after that happened.
And then they're supposed to die off, because I had
three of them rubber banded, and then they die off
at some point when you're go into the bathroom a
couple of days later, it's like it's like a bloody.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
Mess, right right, Yeah, painful though painful.
Speaker 9 (17:51):
Yes, yeah, that was the only reason. I probably had
it for a couple of years, and that just got
worse over time.
Speaker 1 (17:56):
They said a lot of time, well, you know what
a lot of people find out that they need hemorrhoid
treatment is from colonoscopies. So they'll go in and then
it'll be like, hey, you need to get this looked at.
And then there are people like you're right once like
there are people who have them and then just go like, hey,
it's a little bit painful, but I can deal with it.
And then next thing you know, like you're you're you're
(18:18):
essentially at pimple popper going yeah, I've had this thing
for five years, and they're amazed at the site where
yours internal or external? I I three internal and you
were able to tell internal I almost feel like internal
could be worse in that you there's no like putting
cream on or tucks.
Speaker 9 (18:39):
Well, I was freaking out because I thought there was
something else wrong because I'm a hypochondriac.
Speaker 4 (18:44):
Right, and you have a lot of blood. Yeah, blood
in your stool?
Speaker 10 (18:46):
Yeah?
Speaker 9 (18:47):
Blood yeah, get's butt and a stool at Yeah. And
when I finally went to the doctus, like, he laughed,
is there you just got internal hemorrhoids? And then after
the rubber band likeation was done, as I actually just
level with.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
Them, Hey, can I ask you this? How were they
if yours were internal? How were they able to rubber
band them?
Speaker 9 (19:06):
So if they shoved this like scope up your rectum
and it's like a double scope thing. I didn't really
see what he was doing. I googled it later, right,
and then he goes in and I guess they just
put a thing over like I guess, over the hemorrhoid
and it puts a rubber band around it. And then
they shove a heat gun up there through the hole
to like heat it up, so like speeds up the process.
Speaker 2 (19:30):
So is this horrible?
Speaker 9 (19:31):
Like it just it was horrible, horrible?
Speaker 5 (19:35):
How long are you off work?
Speaker 4 (19:37):
Then? Oh, that's a good question.
Speaker 9 (19:38):
Hell long, you know, like a week, like a week.
I was able to go back to work after a week.
Speaker 4 (19:43):
They said, what a lot of people, it's twenty days.
Speaker 3 (19:45):
What did you tell people at work that you had done?
Were you honest?
Speaker 9 (19:49):
So I told everybody exactly. I told everybody exactly what happened.
I worked with a group of strange people.
Speaker 4 (19:54):
Okay, I'd been like, oh my god, brain cancer.
Speaker 9 (20:00):
Yeah, they fixed it in a week. That's what I
thought I had.
Speaker 1 (20:04):
They do say that, they do say that in some
cases you could be out for twenty days.
Speaker 4 (20:09):
Oh my god, because of how bad.
Speaker 1 (20:11):
Now, maybe that is like that the other guy had
the like the surgery was was twenty days.
Speaker 9 (20:17):
Surgery, even the doctor because we were talking about that surgery,
and that sounds like way worse. And I think that's
for like more like bigger hemorrhoids, I guess because mine
weren't like super big. The way they explained that it
was enough to bother me.
Speaker 1 (20:31):
Interesting, all right, very good, very good, Thank you sir,
Thank you, my friend. A new procedure that is favored
is trans anal hemorrhoidal d arterialization.
Speaker 3 (20:46):
Is there a fun acronym for that.
Speaker 4 (20:48):
Not yet, okay.
Speaker 1 (20:50):
That is where a device is inserted into the anus
to locate the artery feeding blood to your hemorrhoids.
Speaker 4 (20:57):
So think about it.
Speaker 1 (20:58):
If you're getting the rubber band and they're chopping off
the hemorrhoid, the surgery, they're going in and they're dealing
with the actual hemorrhoid, the transanal hemorrhoidal dearter realization.
Speaker 5 (21:12):
We could call it like THHD or something.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
Okay, the THHD. Why why why are we calling it THHD.
Speaker 4 (21:19):
You don't like hearing transanal.
Speaker 5 (21:20):
It's a mouthful, yeah, it's a but holefull.
Speaker 4 (21:26):
No, So they want to go in and go hey,
instead of.
Speaker 1 (21:29):
Trying to deal with the rubber band, let's go to
the water source, in this case, the blood source, and
let's go shut that supply down so it doesn't just
keep feeding blood into the hemorrhoids. A new procedure is
the THHD, in which a device is inserted into the
(21:50):
anus to locate the artery feeding blood to your hemorrhoids,
but for a second, device is inserted to tie that
are artery off with sutures. The doctor goes on and says,
I've compared traditional hemorrhoid ectomy to THHD in The return
to work rate was twenty days for the first one.
(22:12):
Like where they could go in and like that guy said,
you're like crapping gauze.
Speaker 4 (22:17):
Three days with THHD.
Speaker 5 (22:18):
Wow, wow, three days and you're fine.
Speaker 1 (22:22):
Yeah, because now you've you've walled off the blood.
Speaker 5 (22:27):
It's pretty good. Get to know. Why are you looking
over there? Yeah? You want Christen to get this done?
Oh wait, what is this? S I'm reading.
Speaker 4 (22:40):
Hold line eight?
Speaker 5 (22:42):
Go ahead, you need an anal lift, then pardon me
because it can leave deflated skin dangling from the anus,
causing cleanliness issues and irritation. You need to have an
anal left. I can continue if you'd like.
Speaker 4 (23:07):
My butthole looks like the catwoman.
Speaker 5 (23:11):
Wilderstein woman loved ask a Chevy Chase face if they
do anal lifts. This doctor who was the you went
to see Megan? Megan a Megan, can you do my butt?
This one uses a barbed tie common with Heber get
(23:31):
your Bard tie common with Korean facelifts. He'll probably remind
us about a war. Uh the never forget. These sutures
have tiny hooks on them with a one way spike,
so that when the hook goes in, it won't come out.
I can use that to decrease your prolapsed skin. Uh,
(23:52):
sometimes insurance companies. I learned this with my laser.
Speaker 3 (23:56):
This is elective, Yes, denies it because it's cosmetic.
Speaker 5 (24:01):
Well, no, it's too experimental.
Speaker 4 (24:02):
Oh now I'll tell you what I'll do.
Speaker 2 (24:05):
I will.
Speaker 5 (24:06):
Life without this.
Speaker 1 (24:08):
I will stand up and I will show Aaron what
I have going on and say, excuse me, mister Hyland,
is this is this elective or not?
Speaker 4 (24:18):
Does yours droop like this?
Speaker 5 (24:20):
You with your butt lift, Dane, You can't live a
normal life if you're struggling with deflated anus skin that dangles.
It says cleanliness issues and irritation.
Speaker 3 (24:31):
What are you doing?
Speaker 1 (24:32):
I'm just dragging this deflated skin around again?
Speaker 9 (24:38):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (24:38):
Cleanliness?
Speaker 1 (24:39):
So is it like like I'm uncircumcised where that gets dirty?
Speaker 2 (24:44):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (24:44):
You're probably right, same thing, dude. You you would.
Speaker 1 (24:49):
Always look like you streaked your pants just because of
that skin.
Speaker 5 (24:54):
I don't know if that's true.
Speaker 4 (24:57):
Well, what else are you storing back there? You're storing pooh?
Speaker 5 (25:01):
If but the skin is it's it's hanging out, Yes,
just here for the party.
Speaker 4 (25:08):
Right up against my underwear, right, but.
Speaker 5 (25:11):
This isn't going into your bowels.
Speaker 4 (25:13):
But my bowels are passing it.
Speaker 5 (25:15):
Well, no, you'd have to then clean. I hope you're
doing that anyway after you go to the bathroom.
Speaker 1 (25:20):
Fifty of the time I feel like I feel like
I'm returning all way too often.
Speaker 4 (25:27):
Mine eight. Hi Elliott the morning? What's wrong?
Speaker 8 (25:30):
Diane?
Speaker 4 (25:31):
Hi Elliott the morning?
Speaker 1 (25:33):
Hello?
Speaker 9 (25:34):
Hi?
Speaker 4 (25:34):
Who's this?
Speaker 11 (25:36):
This is Nicole.
Speaker 4 (25:38):
You have hemorrhoids?
Speaker 10 (25:41):
Yes, sir, I know you.
Speaker 11 (25:43):
Have a big kyle and it's internal sir.
Speaker 4 (25:47):
Wait do you have Do you have that right now?
Speaker 2 (25:52):
Yes?
Speaker 4 (25:59):
Hey do you know? Do you know how you got it?
Speaker 1 (26:05):
No?
Speaker 11 (26:05):
Actually I don't. I actually went in for a colonostrophy
because I was having problems and with my stomach and
that's when they found it. So, uh doubt that I
have him worried. Yeah, or and so I actually go
to the stomach doctor of this week, so and and
(26:27):
and like I'm in pain? So basically, are.
Speaker 9 (26:30):
You in pain?
Speaker 1 (26:30):
Can I can I ask you this? Are you in pain?
Are you in pain sitting? Or like you have stomach pain?
Speaker 5 (26:38):
Uh?
Speaker 10 (26:39):
In pain sitting?
Speaker 5 (26:40):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (26:40):
Yeah, a little sensitive back there?
Speaker 1 (26:42):
Hey, what is the did you have did you have
blood in your stool?
Speaker 10 (26:47):
Yeah, ye, yeah, one one the school.
Speaker 11 (26:52):
And I don't know if anybody had mentioned, but if
you don't take care of this properly and have them removed,
they can actually grow and hang outside your butt.
Speaker 4 (27:04):
Yes, those are the.
Speaker 10 (27:07):
Again, because it could they I know because I know
somebody who had you know, like I said, they didn't
take care of it and they didn't go to the
doctor or whatever, and it was like rolling out their butt.
Speaker 11 (27:22):
So, like I said, because it was internal.
Speaker 1 (27:24):
Right, but I think those are external hemorrhoids like that.
Speaker 4 (27:28):
That's pretty common. That's pretty common, right.
Speaker 11 (27:32):
And I'll just rot if you don't take care of it.
And I mean I've tried preparation in each work.
Speaker 4 (27:39):
That don't work.
Speaker 5 (27:40):
Rookies, Yeah no, but trust me, it does.
Speaker 10 (27:44):
It does.
Speaker 11 (27:45):
It does help it like for maybe like a day,
but it don't go away.
Speaker 1 (27:50):
Usually no, honestly, And usually like it's until you wake
up and get going and then the body like you're walking,
and what happens when you walk, Your legs go back
and for it, Well so does your ass.
Speaker 4 (28:00):
So yeah, then you're thank you.
Speaker 5 (28:04):
So you have to crab walk everywhere usually you only
do it to get the stall right.
Speaker 4 (28:10):
No, but I mean.
Speaker 11 (28:11):
No seriously, you know, like I said, if you don't
take care of it, then you know you you are
going to suffer. I mean I've been suffering for I
don't know, uh, maybe a couple of years.
Speaker 10 (28:25):
So a couple of.
Speaker 4 (28:26):
Years, Honey, you've waited too long.
Speaker 10 (28:30):
What I see a doctor?
Speaker 11 (28:32):
So I mean, but still, I mean, I'm gonna I'm
going to have it removed.
Speaker 4 (28:36):
Uh do you know if there are they doing?
Speaker 1 (28:38):
Are they doing rubber band ligation or are you going
to try this new THHD?
Speaker 10 (28:43):
I'm not even sure.
Speaker 11 (28:44):
I won't even know until Thursday, so when I go
to see her.
Speaker 4 (28:48):
So, hey, so Thursday you'll be at the doctor.
Speaker 1 (28:51):
Do you want to come to six Flags on Friday?
Speaker 9 (28:58):
No?
Speaker 1 (28:59):
Seriously, yeah, being serious, I'll give you passage to join.
Speaker 4 (29:02):
Us in six Flags. All right, that's cool, perfect, all right?
Speaker 1 (29:07):
Hold on one second, Hold on one second. I can't
wait to watch you ride a roller coaster.
Speaker 4 (29:12):
Hold on one second.
Speaker 2 (29:13):
Ploor.
Speaker 5 (29:16):
Oh, I thought that's face was reserved for Nancy. What's
that the wave pool?
Speaker 10 (29:24):
The Oh?
Speaker 4 (29:25):
I'll be with Nancy.
Speaker 1 (29:26):
Yeah, no, she's got to get on the roller coasters.
Speaker 5 (29:32):
Because this morning you said that Nancy had to think
about where she's going to lukie in the wave pool exactly,
no before or after.
Speaker 1 (29:46):
Let me grab line three, hi Elliet in the morning.
Definitely both internal and external, right.
Speaker 5 (29:59):
U?
Speaker 4 (30:00):
Yeah? Hello, Yeah, you sound like you got a lot
going on.
Speaker 8 (30:06):
No, I just switched off my blue tooth. I actually
had had a surgery about ten years ago for a
fisher and I told him hemorrhoids, and then he decided
he wasn't going to get rid of the hemorrhoids because
he's conservative. And then a week later I ended up
back in the hospital for a second surgery to have
everything taken out again.
Speaker 1 (30:24):
Why did he not want to do the surgery for
the for the hemorrhoids.
Speaker 8 (30:29):
Because he was on the conservative side. But then he
sent me the bill for the second surgery, and I
told him, if he would have spent it the first
time correctly, he wouldn't be sending me a bill for
the second one. And I never heard from him again.
Speaker 4 (30:40):
But wait, are there are there people that are opposed?
Speaker 1 (30:43):
Like are there people that doctors like I don't I
don't understand that.
Speaker 5 (30:46):
Like doctors that immediately don't go to surgery they body
heeled thy self type thing or conservative like no butt stuff.
Speaker 8 (30:54):
Well, no, he had to fix the fissure, but he
didn't want to do too much.
Speaker 1 (30:58):
At once. They thought it was oh okay, gotcha right,
So so yeah, he wanted to treat.
Speaker 4 (31:02):
He wanted to treat the lake and not the stream, gotcha.
Speaker 8 (31:06):
Yeah, but the stream of what ended up being uh
an Epen River
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