Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
My friend is American and she's always wanted to come
to the Netherlands, where I'm from. Well, I didn't have
to tell you it was from the Netherlands. You would
have just found out right there. My friend is American.
She's always wanted to come to the Netherlands where I'm from.
We've been e friends for about three years. I didn't
(00:23):
even know what she looked like until a year ago.
Keep in mind i'd never seen her full body till now,
only selfies.
Speaker 2 (00:32):
Okay, where is this going now?
Speaker 3 (00:37):
I'm not hey, Colin.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Can you tell by the smirk on his face?
Speaker 4 (00:42):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (00:42):
Okay, Diane, where's this going?
Speaker 2 (00:46):
She's large?
Speaker 1 (00:49):
Now? Why would you?
Speaker 3 (00:50):
Why would you?
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Because of the look on your face?
Speaker 3 (00:53):
How large?
Speaker 2 (00:55):
I don't know more than he expected.
Speaker 4 (00:57):
I'm guessing differently, thinking it's maybe dwarf ism. Seriously, Well, Paddington,
the actress who is in the suit in the West End,
it's very top of mind. You know, that's also controlled
by a puppeteer off stage. God more Paddington content anyway.
Speaker 1 (01:14):
Anyway, keep in mind, i'd never say Diane thinks she's big.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
That's okay, I think small.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
Keep in mind I'd never seen her full body till
now only selfies. When she told me she wanted to visit,
I was like, that's so much fun. Why don't you
come to the Netherlands and stay with me? What I
did not consider. What I did not consider, is that
you have to take the stairs to get up to
(01:41):
my apartment.
Speaker 3 (01:42):
And those stairs are in fact quite narrow.
Speaker 1 (01:52):
Regular regular sized people can't fit through. Regular sized people
can fit through, but it's not exactly wide.
Speaker 4 (02:04):
So this is extremely You've seen those old.
Speaker 5 (02:07):
Like historic walk up type buildings before, right, there's probably
something like that in New York. I didn't live in
one of those, no, but I'm just saying, like you've
seen them.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
Before, like nothing like I've gone to like like you know,
like like some places like the bars upstairs and you have.
Speaker 3 (02:24):
To go up like a narrow staircase.
Speaker 4 (02:26):
Oh great example, then Lucky Bar used to have the tiniest.
Speaker 3 (02:30):
You know what, I think.
Speaker 1 (02:31):
You're right, Yeah, it was pretty narrow, but I feel
like even a lobby would be able to get up
the stairs at Lucky Bar, Right, I remember it being
very very narrow, But that that was the first thing
that came to mind, is that, like I don't I don't.
I don't think I've ever been to an apartment and listen,
an apartment building or a walk up is different than
(02:53):
a bar.
Speaker 4 (02:57):
Oh you're gonna try to read again, you've composed yourself.
Speaker 3 (03:01):
When she told me she wanted to visit, I was like,
that's so fun.
Speaker 1 (03:05):
Oh here I am regular sized people can fit through,
but it's not exactly wide.
Speaker 3 (03:10):
When I saw my friend.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
So what he's like going to pick her up at.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
The airport or when I meet her?
Speaker 1 (03:18):
She was bigger than I expected. Honestly, so I was
wrong but ordered that I expected. But I'm obviously not
going to say that. So we drove back to my place.
When we got to my building's front door, I saw
her expression kind of deflate and I didn't even connect
(03:43):
the dots until I unlocked it and looked behind me
and thought, uh.
Speaker 3 (03:47):
Oh, she's not fitting up these stairs.
Speaker 4 (03:51):
Horrible but an awkward unfortunately.
Speaker 3 (03:57):
But what do you do?
Speaker 2 (04:00):
Go find a hotel?
Speaker 4 (04:02):
The wh a hotel?
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Well, if I can't fit up the stairs to his no.
Speaker 4 (04:09):
I guess the last resort thing. But that is an
unexpected expense.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
Okay, so let me ask you this. When you say
find a hotel, just her.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
Yeah, her and him, I would say, just her right,
because she's mortified enough. She may be headed back to
the airport.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
No, come on, come on, you like you gotta make
you gotta find a way to make a funny out
of it.
Speaker 3 (04:38):
Well, I guess I'll just wait here.
Speaker 5 (04:41):
I ain't fitting up those Wait where's the courtyard by Marriott?
Speaker 2 (04:47):
And I need ground floor?
Speaker 3 (04:48):
The wait? What do you mean who's making the joe?
She has to okay, yeah.
Speaker 4 (04:59):
Yes, the other person shouldn't say anything.
Speaker 3 (05:02):
Well, what is he going to say? Hey, if I
oil the railings, does that help?
Speaker 4 (05:05):
But then said he should jump in and or see you.
I don't know if.
Speaker 3 (05:09):
He's he's already up top looking back, going like.
Speaker 4 (05:12):
Oh no, but that's where Dane said he should jump
in and spring for a room.
Speaker 3 (05:16):
The no, why is he springing for a room?
Speaker 5 (05:19):
I would say, I if I'm her, I'm springing for
the room. I'm already mortified. I'm not going to be like, hey,
slim me a couple hundred bucks.
Speaker 4 (05:26):
I see. So you don't want him to say, oh,
let's go get a hotel.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
Now you're just doing that on your own?
Speaker 1 (05:31):
And are you saying like, I'll just go get a
room and I'll never talk to you again.
Speaker 4 (05:35):
Probably. Oh so you think this affects everything moving forward. Yeah,
but they're good friends.
Speaker 5 (05:43):
Yeah, but I mean here, we could still hang out,
go see a museum.
Speaker 2 (05:47):
Okay, we can go to dinner.
Speaker 3 (05:49):
Stop it, stop it, stop it, stop it.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
You've been You've been flirting with each other online for
three years. She's coming to the Netherlands to visit you.
You know what everybody's thinking.
Speaker 3 (06:03):
I don't know. I don't know how they speak in
the Netherlands.
Speaker 4 (06:05):
But uh oh, stop it, stop it. People have plenty
of platonic relationships online. I honestly but think of as
being a sexual.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
One hundred persons because she was coming to stay with him.
Speaker 1 (06:22):
Yes, by the way, by the way, I'll tell you this.
Speaker 3 (06:25):
If I'm that guy, she.
Speaker 1 (06:26):
May not have been thinking it, but I know someone
that was him.
Speaker 3 (06:30):
Really I am not.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
I'm sorry. This is just I'm going to tell you
right now. This is how the human brain works. If
I am friends with you for three years and we
have an online relationship where we're chatty with each other
and we're sending pictures with each other, and you're coming
to see me, I believe it with one certainty.
Speaker 3 (06:52):
It's in the bag.
Speaker 4 (06:53):
Well, first, you're throwing.
Speaker 3 (06:56):
You know, I never said dins.
Speaker 4 (07:00):
Come to the Netherlands.
Speaker 1 (07:02):
Yeah, exactly, and come on over and there's gonna gonna
be some shirt.
Speaker 4 (07:07):
But if it's but if you are, god.
Speaker 3 (07:11):
Stop it's going.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
That is everybody's thought, is I'm going to have sex.
Speaker 3 (07:18):
It's his thought, it's her thoughts.
Speaker 1 (07:20):
I know both of them believe they are going worse.
Now at minimum, at minimum, we're just touching it.
Speaker 3 (07:29):
But we are having sex. We will agree to disagree,
Diane judge.
Speaker 4 (07:35):
But you're letting a past story and we can't tell
it on the air. You're letting a past story involving
international travel inform your thoughts on this. Wait, what do
you mean where if the passport's involved, there has to
be some sort of hooking up. You can't tell the story.
Speaker 1 (07:50):
Oh yes, yes, one hundred percent.
Speaker 3 (07:54):
One hundred percent.
Speaker 4 (07:55):
And you've always thought that because of it.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
By the way that story was told on the air,
it was it cost him his job.
Speaker 4 (08:03):
Oh I didn't realize that anyway, don't bring it up again.
Speaker 3 (08:08):
Man, are we talking about the same person?
Speaker 4 (08:10):
I don't know. Now, I'll give you the last name
oh my god. No, yes, how about give another clue?
Speaker 1 (08:16):
No, I'll give you though, don't say an one is local,
one is not.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
That doesn't help enough.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
Lia DECI, Yes, thank you. Yeah, by the way, that
cost him his job.
Speaker 3 (08:30):
Hi, ted, Congratstovie on nine hundred.
Speaker 1 (08:36):
Yes, that that story was on the by the way,
and don't get mad at me.
Speaker 3 (08:40):
He told that story on the air.
Speaker 4 (08:43):
I just didn't know if it was something that could
be brought back up again.
Speaker 3 (08:46):
Oh yeah, it's fine. Yeah, nothing happened to me, and
Diane backed me up.
Speaker 1 (08:51):
He's the one, Jonathan Ladecki is the one who told
that story on the air, and that that he got,
he got. They got really pissed at him for that. Yeah,
but he's the one that told that story, not me. Okay,
he told it to me on the air.
Speaker 4 (09:05):
Moving on, if you're very fond of if you're traveling
the glove, you are going overseas to meet somebody that
you've been friends with online, you're going to you.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
I'm not saying that you're gonna get there and think
this is my husband, this is my wife, But I
can tell you what. We're gonna have some drinks and
we are we're touching. We're a ha ha, and then
we are probably having some of the sex.
Speaker 4 (09:28):
No, you see it. You've been to the Netherlands, Yes, but.
Speaker 1 (09:34):
It wasn't to visit somebody saying that I had been
chatting with online for three years.
Speaker 4 (09:38):
You have a better impression.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
Oh, I don't know how they speak.
Speaker 1 (09:41):
I spoke English to my English friends in the Netherlands.
Speaker 4 (09:45):
You heard Dutch.
Speaker 3 (09:49):
Yeah, but I don't remember what it sounds like.
Speaker 4 (09:52):
Sounded like somebody throwing up panicocin. There's like Kristen travels
a lot.
Speaker 3 (09:58):
Oh to Detroit.
Speaker 4 (10:00):
He went, not just this past weekend. But if to
take the expense out of travel for lodging is an
unbelievable benefits.
Speaker 1 (10:11):
Oh yeah, No, that's the other thing I was going
to say, is all of a sudden this trip became
a lot more expensive because now I got to get
a hotel.
Speaker 4 (10:18):
No, but I'm saying for a bucket list destination and
you know someone there that you're comfortable enough with, And
don't think it's a serial killer because you've talked online.
I don't think the expectation for relations is there.
Speaker 3 (10:32):
You're wrong. I'm just telling you you're wrong. Kristen, is
he wrong. No, oh, well, you're not coming to visit me.
Speaker 1 (10:42):
I swear to God after three years, if you if
you come over here and and and there's nothing, and
I'm blue balling it.
Speaker 3 (10:52):
Oh my die of DSB.
Speaker 4 (10:53):
Now you can't walk up the stairs.
Speaker 3 (10:57):
Yep, you guys are crazy.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
You're crazy, Diane, thank.
Speaker 4 (11:04):
You, because you're a horny Yeah, that's why I came
to the NED.
Speaker 3 (11:08):
It's not it's somewhere you wanted to visit four years.
Speaker 1 (11:11):
I can see the end Frank House. I can go
see whatever flowers they're famous for.
Speaker 3 (11:15):
I can eat.
Speaker 1 (11:17):
I'm sardines or not chardine.
Speaker 3 (11:20):
So plan them right.
Speaker 1 (11:21):
Here them harrying. Yeah, and then yeah, we're definitely we're
going to the Red Light District cake and yeah, and
then I am pounding it, pound in it. Sorry, that's
how it works. That's how that's how life works.
Speaker 4 (11:38):
Back to this couple.
Speaker 1 (11:38):
If you don't believe me, ask John ladecy No, don't
call him a couple.
Speaker 3 (11:43):
Yes. So anyway, this poor woman.
Speaker 1 (11:46):
Is standing at the bottom of the stairs essentially sheets
for underwear.
Speaker 3 (11:52):
It is just.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
We don't.
Speaker 3 (11:55):
I don't, I don't, I don't.
Speaker 1 (11:57):
Well, actually I can give you one if you can
image in the hallway.
Speaker 3 (12:01):
Imagine she doesn't fit in.
Speaker 4 (12:02):
She's bigger, remember I guess smaller.
Speaker 3 (12:11):
He offers, I.
Speaker 1 (12:12):
Can tell you what he does, and then I promise
I'll grab these people. He offers to split split the
cost of an airbnb with her.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
Well that's nice.
Speaker 3 (12:22):
He was pissed.
Speaker 2 (12:24):
Why was she pissed?
Speaker 1 (12:25):
Because she then said she she went that way of
like why are you staying with me? And he was like, oh,
I just thought, like for the expanse. Yeah, and that's
when she turned. She turned the tables on him, was like, no,
you just want to come over there and bang me.
Speaker 2 (12:41):
So she's getting but she's embarrassed. So she's all indignant.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
Yes, okay, she's feeling bad for herself and I just
go home.
Speaker 2 (12:50):
I know what I would do.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
Hey, is there a panic cooked shop open?
Speaker 5 (12:54):
Yep, right at the skip A airport, because that's where
I'm going.
Speaker 4 (12:59):
From Instagram.
Speaker 3 (13:00):
Yes.
Speaker 4 (13:02):
I don't know if this person has traveled there extensively
or just is familiar with it. Many Dutch buildings have
historic hook and pulley systems like oh.
Speaker 2 (13:12):
I got to get in the dumb waiter?
Speaker 1 (13:14):
No no, but like it like a piano coming into
the living room.
Speaker 4 (13:19):
Paul used to lift items through windows because of their
narrow interiors.
Speaker 3 (13:25):
Right, hey, is that a baby green? No, that's a lady.
Speaker 1 (13:31):
That's a lady, much more humiliating standing at the bottom
of the steerwell.
Speaker 3 (13:39):
Going, or.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
On the back of my dress.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
Or you're being hoisted into the air by a bunch
of guys going poulp.
Speaker 2 (13:51):
On the street.
Speaker 4 (13:56):
That was what the guy said.
Speaker 3 (14:02):
Well, all right, so now we have two choices. We
can hoist you or moisture.
Speaker 4 (14:08):
Everyone is claiming these two are online dating. Where did
you get that from the story?
Speaker 1 (14:13):
Because you are not friends with somebody in a foreign
country for three years and then agree to meet. If
you don't believe, oh my god, Diane's with me. If
you're not going to hook up, you're married, and you
don't think like that they're married.
Speaker 2 (14:34):
We think that way.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
Go ask Casey, Go ask Kayley who's also married? Now
ask Jed? Is Jed right there?
Speaker 2 (14:40):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (14:42):
Ask her the the the no? Yeah, yeah, tell her
to come here.
Speaker 4 (14:47):
Every every pen pal you've ever had, I never had
a pen pal.
Speaker 3 (14:51):
I have real friends.
Speaker 4 (14:57):
Again, when she comes and give the context, is the
it was not?
Speaker 1 (15:01):
And can I ask you something real quick. No, do
you have do you have any friends in foreign country?
I know you have a lot of friends. You're a
very sweet lady, do you and you're.
Speaker 3 (15:11):
Yeah, I have cousins.
Speaker 4 (15:13):
I'm still single.
Speaker 1 (15:14):
Okay the no, No, But do you do you have
any Do you have any male friends that live in
a foreign country that you've never met? You've never met,
you're just online friends with No.
Speaker 4 (15:26):
I don't think that.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
Okay, so but now let's pretend you do. There's somebody,
there's somebody in in Amsterdam that you've been friends with
online for three years and all you've done is chat.
You've never met each other. You've sent pictures to each
other and stuff like that. You've never met each other.
Speaker 3 (15:43):
Right, do we have a friend in common? No? No,
I don't know how you mett. I have no idea
how you met. Right, here's what I know. Here's what
I know. You're like, I've always.
Speaker 1 (15:53):
Wanted to go to Amsterdam. I've always wanted to go
to Amsterdam. And he's like, oh my god, come to Amsterdam.
We've been friends for three years, we haven't met. Stay
at my place. And you're like, that's very nice, that's
very nice. If you got to his place. Would you
expect you've agreed to stay at his place? He invited
you in your staying, don't you in your head? What
(16:13):
is gonna happen?
Speaker 3 (16:16):
Thank you? Thank you? Thank you.
Speaker 1 (16:18):
Okay, And that was Jen, who in the middle of
my story you can only see it on Channel one,
shook her head.
Speaker 3 (16:23):
You would not have accepted.
Speaker 5 (16:24):
The way I'm staying in a man's place that I've
never met in person, because you know.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
You're gonna bury a bone if you stay there. Absolutely,
thank you. M yeah, whatever. But you know the expectation
is I said yes to stay at your house, I
may as well take my panties off in the car
plain exactly. All right, very good, thank you Jen. Yeah,
and that's a nice person. What are you saying about
(16:51):
Dian No, No, I'm just saying that's not like you
wouldn't look at Jen and go like, oh, Jen's all slutty.
Speaker 3 (16:56):
She just wants to go over there.
Speaker 1 (16:57):
And just ride a pony, all right, that's all anybody's thinking.
I'm about to get me some.
Speaker 4 (17:06):
So does that make the story worse?
Speaker 3 (17:09):
Well?
Speaker 1 (17:10):
Yeah, I mean both of them know, and the only
thing separating them is a long stairwell.
Speaker 3 (17:18):
I did give you the option to hoist. Oh my god,
Hi Elliott the morning.
Speaker 1 (17:25):
Hello, Hi, who's this?
Speaker 6 (17:28):
This is Crissy.
Speaker 2 (17:29):
I just wanted to.
Speaker 6 (17:29):
Say I stayed in the Canal house and.
Speaker 3 (17:32):
Those stairs are like ladders.
Speaker 6 (17:34):
And they're super super narrow. And the reason why they
have the Pulley system is because you're not moving any
furniture other than like a small handheld box up those stairs.
Speaker 3 (17:44):
Okay, but what about a weekend visitor.
Speaker 7 (17:48):
You might have to hoyster.
Speaker 6 (17:52):
But we think they had to pay taxes on the
space of their like they're outside of the house, so
in order to have a bigger house, they made narrow,
steep stairs that are basically like ladders.
Speaker 1 (18:05):
By the way, I like how everybody is like so knowledge.
I know of the of the stairways in h Norway.
Speaker 4 (18:10):
Yeah, because at some point they really wanted to visit them.
Speaker 6 (18:16):
It's just exactly different than what we have here, right, Okay,
this is a commodity.
Speaker 1 (18:23):
Can I ask you this? Don't you agree? Like they
know sex has taking place?
Speaker 6 (18:28):
I mean I would have assumed.
Speaker 3 (18:30):
Yeah, thank you, thank you, all right, very good, thank you.
Speaker 2 (18:33):
And Tyler has pen pals made an ass.
Speaker 4 (18:36):
Out of you and me I don't currently have pen palace,
and most of it was orchestrated through school. It wasn't
like I was seeking it out of my own in
my defense, but nothing against pen pals.
Speaker 3 (18:52):
Let me grab line for Hi Elliott the morning. Yeah, Hi,
who's this?
Speaker 7 (19:00):
It's Josh.
Speaker 1 (19:01):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (19:01):
What's going on, dude?
Speaker 7 (19:03):
Hey, I got a question for you. That's what I've
been taking the whole time. You said everything for three years.
Speaker 1 (19:08):
No, not dating, not dating, They have been they have
been friends for three years.
Speaker 7 (19:14):
Okay, friends, Okay, Well, if I was e friends with
one for three years by year one, i'd be asking
for some news.
Speaker 3 (19:27):
By the way, you're not you're not absolutely no, no,
but you're not. You're not alone. You're not alone.
Speaker 7 (19:37):
Yeah, I'd be like, I see that face, you know,
let me let me see, uh, you know what's down under?
Speaker 4 (19:41):
Kind off, it's not Australia.
Speaker 7 (19:45):
And then and then and then you know it keeps
avoiding it. Well you know, but why you keep avoiding
that kind of thing?
Speaker 3 (19:53):
And I don't know.
Speaker 7 (19:54):
It just makes me suspicious that, you know, come on,
you know, depending on we're talking about, come on, give
me some nudes within three years.
Speaker 4 (20:04):
That's great, that's great he is.
Speaker 3 (20:07):
But you know what, he's not wrong. He's not wrong.
I get it.
Speaker 1 (20:14):
And you would have seen you would have sent a
d PICK in three years, yeah, or at.
Speaker 7 (20:19):
Least talked a little bit, like, you know, try to
get to that point and then you know, maybe maybe unsolicited,
maybe a solicited DPA. I don't know.
Speaker 3 (20:28):
You know, Hey, look who's up early exactly? I'm with you.
Speaker 1 (20:32):
I could date you, I could date you. All right,
very good, thank you, sir, mine too. Hi, Ellie in
the morning. Do you think right now?
Speaker 3 (20:41):
Tarley is like, oh, thank god, they moved on from me. Hi,
who's this?
Speaker 8 (20:47):
Hey, Elliott? Step from DC.
Speaker 3 (20:48):
Hey, what's going on? Steve?
Speaker 7 (20:51):
Hey?
Speaker 8 (20:51):
I have a story it's very similar to this. So
my best friend lives in Columbia, so house drawing. He's
a doctor down there, and I visited for football games.
Speaker 3 (20:58):
Wait, hold on, what did you say Columbia South Carolina?
Speaker 4 (21:02):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (21:02):
Oh okay, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 8 (21:04):
We got to South Carolina football games once the fall.
And one time I went down there, went to Otaogate
with a bunch of doctor friends and I hit it
off with one of them. It was fun dancing bar
or whatever. And then the following summer we had been
texting the whole time and snapchatting and really flirty. So
I told my buddy, I'm coming down to visit him,
but I'm gonna stop at her place for a night.
So I got down there. She picked me up from
the airport. We went to her place, had drank, hang out,
(21:27):
got in bed, and I, you know, Tyler, you had
a little hands and you had some fun. And she said,
I don't know what she expected. We're not doing this
right now. I said, did I miss something? She goes, no,
I just I don't know what. I don't know how
what your expected expectations were like. So I went and
slept to the couch. I was pissed off, and then
went hanging out with my friends. How do you flirt
for six months?
Speaker 1 (21:45):
And then yeah, and you said she was very She
was very flirty, right, and she invited you to sleep
in her bed.
Speaker 8 (21:54):
And keep in mind I'm thirty one and she's thirty three.
I don't understand. I just don't get it.
Speaker 4 (22:00):
As someone who I sat next to multiple girls, not
done anything. It happens, no, no, no, And I'm with you.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
But if there hadn't been all the flirty and like
kind of the flirty talk and hey, stay in my
bed like that, that that and again and and by
the way, you did the right thing, like you you
you you made your move and she said no, and
you you were respectful of that. I'm with you, but
I would have been I understand that of being like, seriously,
what what what's.
Speaker 3 (22:29):
Going on here?
Speaker 8 (22:32):
Yeah, like I'm all freaking like, obviously consent is most
of everything. Yeah, obviously it goes without saying. But it's
also like I told my best friend that and his
girlfriend and she was like, that's ridiculous. She did in secure.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
Man, you know what, I'm going to run this by
John Ladecy
Speaker 4 (22:52):
Goodness, I am of a spit her drink out all
over the board.