October 28, 2025 • 17 mins
We talk Dave's Paul McCartney tickets, Bailey's Hinge journey, and the benefit of loving and losing.
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Minnesota Goodbye. Somebody texted during the radio show this morning, said,
what's the address for the Minnesota Goodbye? And it's funny
because we always give it at the end of the podcast,
but never at the beginning. And I know that there
is definitely a pattern of people who will listen to
the first part of a podcast but not all the
way through the end. So the address to get on
the Minnesota Goodbye is Ryan's show at KADIWB dot com.
(00:23):
And if we read your email, and we've never read
an email from you before, and you want a staff
writer sticker, it's an attractive little sticker.
Speaker 2 (00:31):
It is.
Speaker 1 (00:31):
It's a round, it's about the size of the pall
me your hand or a little bit smaller, and it
says official staff writer Minnesota Goodbye. Stick it on your yetty.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
Yeah, put that on your resume too, because you're a
staff writer.
Speaker 1 (00:45):
We do have an email to start things off, a
couple of emails at Ryans show at KATWB dot com.
Hello there, morning show crew. By the way, Jenny's presenting
down the hall, so she's not on what is she
presenting about media?
Speaker 2 (00:56):
About social media something?
Speaker 3 (00:58):
She might come in at some point, but I don't
know okay, she might get asked a lot of questions.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
Uh.
Speaker 1 (01:03):
Hearing the rant about people assuming you're pregnant reminded me
of a time that happened to me. For context, my
kids are two and four and this happened within the
last month. I walked into a small wedding that served
champagne before the ceremony, and the server Tanya handed one
to my husband and then said, I have sparkling juice
for you. Oh, And I responded with nope, I'm just fat,
(01:23):
and she says, oh girl, I got you, and she
handed me champagne. She came over a few minutes later
to refill my glass and nobody else's. Tanya hooked me
up with the entire night. My glass was never empty
from that point forward. She gave me the extras of
the best apps, and she even showed me the best
bathroom to use. She definitely turned a faux pas into
a great night for me. Enjoy your day, all right,
(01:46):
from Cali.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
That's cute.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
I do like that she was just like, Nope, just fat,
because that's that's the kind of response you always want
to give when somebody says make the comment about the
way you look and you're like, Oh, let's turn it
around and make it weird for you.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
Yeah, we were talking about this the other day on
the show, like What Stuck with You? And I had
talked about when I was in about fifth grade. My
best friend's older sister said I had a snoopy belly,
and it didn't really bother me because it's kind of true.
I'm sway back and I don't stand up straight. I
don't put my shoulders back. I kind of leaned back
like this, and it looks like but I've always remembered that.
(02:20):
So we did What Stuck with You? Nate writes in
I was wondering if you had any resolution to your
Paul McCartney ticket situation. Really quick story. We paid a
lot of money for our tickets. They screwed them up somehow,
and they sat us in a section where I'm all
but positive they ripped us off. They didn't mean to,
(02:42):
but they gave us tickets in a okay section. When
we played, paid for the best seats in the house,
and they gave us a wristband which allowed us on
the floor. But we were not on the floor and
the people around us did not have wristbands, so Nate
goes on to say, if it happened to me, I
don't know if I would have been able to enjoy
the content, Sir, I'd just be constantly thinking about how
(03:02):
I paid top dollar for tickets and got downgraded. I'm
also curious how helpful or unhelpful Ticketmaster or US Bank
Stadium wasn't dealing with this. You know what, Thanks for
the reminder. I'm going to write myself a note. The
reason I haven't done anything is because I'm almost certain
they won't be able to help me. Yeah. It was
(03:24):
when we got our seats. I mean, we were so excited.
I always bring binoculars to a concert because I want
to see Yeah, and this time I didn't because I
thought he's going to be right there. And when we
got our seats, I was like, are you kidding? Fuck?
But then I thought I'm not going to let this
ruin the experience. What I should have done, and I
don't know why I didn't, was get up and go
(03:45):
back and say this is not right. But I sat
there like a dumb ass and didn't do anything about it.
Speaker 3 (03:52):
I wonder if you did have access to the floor,
but they didn't explain how your access to the floor worked,
so like you never got to enjoy that part, you know,
because why give you a risk?
Speaker 2 (04:02):
Bar, I don't know, you know, that's what I There's.
Speaker 1 (04:04):
One woman in particular that I know that she she
was the one who fucked it up. And I remember
because we went to the box office blah blah blah
because our tickets wouldn't scan blah blah blah, and the
guy at the box office didn't know, so he went
and got a supervisor, and then she went and got
us the wrong tickets and a wristband to get on
(04:26):
the floor. Yeah, so Nate, I appreciate it. Yeah, we
tried not to let it bother us, but it it did.
Because we're not talking about one hundred dollars difference. We're
talking about about a fifteen hundred dollars indifference price yeh
each each each Bailey. So we probably lost about three
(04:47):
thousand dollars in that whole concert.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Geez.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
But it was Paul McCartney.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
And Paul McCartney you love him.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
So we were talking about because we looked at the
email stack here and there's really not a lot and
some days that's just how it is. So we thought, well,
what else can we talk about. We're going to talk
about Bailey's Hinge experience.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
Oh okay, I'm great.
Speaker 3 (05:07):
I'm so excited, so as I mean, you don't have
a lot to relate to this, unfortunately, David. I'm sorry
you've never had to navigate the healscape that is Hinge.
So here's some fun facts about Hinge. You can only
have eight unanswered messages in your inbox, and then they
stop letting boys message you if you don't message them back, So.
Speaker 1 (05:28):
That means you're not participating, you're not interacting, so hey stop.
Speaker 3 (05:32):
But if you have a bunch of conversations going, you
just have to keep up all of these different conversations.
And I've mentioned this before, but some of these dudes
I'm getting like I have to scroll up and remind
myself what it is that we were talking about right now.
My favorite ones are Eric and Sam. Those are my
two favorites because I keep I'm pretty good at finding
(05:54):
out information about these people because all you're given is
their first name, and then you can find out like
what they do for a living, and then I just
go through their pictures and see if I can find
any like discerning information about their job based on pictures
because like I realize because some people are like that's
you're looking for something bad about them. No, I'm just
(06:15):
trying to learn more about them. That doesn't tell me
anything on their profile. Like some of these people too,
Like one guy is super active on Twitter, but he's
always in fights, Like he's in political fights on Twitter,
and I don't really want to date somebody who's in
political fights on Twitter, which he does not have in
his profile, so like of course he doesn't have that
in his profile, Like I'm a really heated dude on Twitter,
(06:39):
Like who I'm a hard pass on that. So yeah,
I'm just having random conversations. And then we're also supposed
to be waiting. When I say we, I mean women,
you're supposed to wait for them to ask you out,
like ask you to go through something.
Speaker 1 (06:51):
Why, I don't know. Is that a rule? Unhinge?
Speaker 3 (06:54):
I think that's you know, the quote unquote game is
that you wait for them to ask you out.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
Well, then why go against the grain and be somebody
who asked them out? I know, well, you are a
strong independent woman, I act like.
Speaker 3 (07:05):
What I'm trying my Well, then they'll like go like
days without talking to you. So you're like, oh, okay, well,
good thing I didn't ask you out because you clearly
don't care.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
I don't write to a guy and say, hey, want
to get lucky, meets you Cariboo.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
Want to get lucky.
Speaker 1 (07:18):
Yeah, he'll think that's funny.
Speaker 2 (07:19):
No, we won't. He'll think he's going to get some
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (07:21):
Then maybe he's going to get something. No, listen, you
sneak into the bathroom. CAB's been nothing's been easier. Really,
you go into the bathroom of Cariboo, you like, have
him lean over the sink, and you just give it
to him. Give it, give it to him over the sink.
I did give it. Boom but boom but boom. Well.
Speaker 3 (07:38):
I sat next to a like sort of a friend
acquaintance kind of person yesterday at this movie that I
went to go see because our friend directed it, and
he was telling me that he just broke up with
his girlfriend not that long ago of like four years, and.
Speaker 2 (07:50):
He's sad about it.
Speaker 3 (07:50):
And I'm like, oh, and we're here, we're here, we
are sitting together and sharing popcorn.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
Take him to the Cariboo. I could take him the
carend him over the sink and give it to him.
I boom boom ba boomy.
Speaker 2 (08:01):
Write that down, all right, wrote it down.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
But bend him over the sinker. Boom boom boom both.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
The sink boom boom boom bom boom bomb.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
Anyway, we had a really interesting conversation on the show
this morning, and we kept it as you know, I mean,
it was adult, but we tried not to make it dirty.
It was a woman who wrote in and she said,
her new boyfriend checks all the boxes, but he's really
bad at sex. Everything from he treats her boobs like
a squeeze ball as stress ball, he's finished really quick,
(08:30):
he doesn't go downtown, he doesn't do this, he doesn't
do that. And it's like we were just kind of
like baffled. Baffled that's the perfect word. How can an
adult be so clueless? You know, when it comes to sex,
when you're new at it, you don't really know what
you're doing. It's trial and error. But I think most
people want to please their partner because they get a
(08:54):
lot of enjoyment out of seeing that partner having a
great time. There's nothing more boring than looking down at
somebody who's like going I think I had a girl,
Rita Rita one set something like can you hurry up?
And I was like wow, really wow?
Speaker 3 (09:09):
Yeah, how long had it been? An hour and a half?
Because then I understand with Rita.
Speaker 1 (09:13):
I don't remember well, I mean maybe fifteen minutes or
something like that.
Speaker 2 (09:17):
Yeah, yeah, but an hour and a half, yeah, get
it over.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
Well it always cracked me up. But I was living
that song the other day, wet like the rain, Yes,
And it's all about this inexperienced guy that knows nothing
about sex talking about I want to make love to
you all night long. And it was based on like
all the like the the H R and B songs
of the early to mid nineties. Yeah, of some guy
who's twenty two years old talking about how he's the
best you're gonna ever have and we're going to make
(09:42):
love all night long. And it's like, no, nobody wants
to make love all night long. You get sore, you
get dried up, you get spent, you're sweaty, you got
a cramp in your hip because your leg has been
behind your neck the entire night. So yeah, but I
think some guys think, well, like I heard that. I
(10:04):
remember when I was in probably high school or college.
I was reading Penthouse Forum. Do you know what Penthouse
Forum is?
Speaker 2 (10:10):
I assume it's a boob magazine, but you were reading
it for the articles.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
A you write in. It's probably not around anymore. You
would write in about your sexual experience. I never thought
anything like this would happen to me, but I was
at a tennis tournament and three tennis coaches all came
on to me. We had a big four way naked pile,
So you write it. And somebody wrote in and they
said this, and I always remembered it. They said, if
she ever starts acting like it's feeling good, don't go
(10:37):
faster because a guy will be like, oh, it's working,
she's getting excited.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
I'm going to go faster, and then you ruin it.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
And then you ruin it because what she's telling you
is she's really enjoying what you're doing right now. I'll
just wrap up by saying, if you want to go
back and listen to that part of the show, it
was around eight o'clock on Tuesday morning, Yes, and it
was really interesting. We try not to make it too dirty.
Her big question was, you know the sex is not
good will the relationship survive even without good sack.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
Yeah, is that a deal breaker? And we had a
lot of people way in.
Speaker 1 (11:12):
So yeah, it was really interesting. So I'm not bringing
this up on the air because I mean I could.
I just have not, and I don't know if I will.
But my brother. I have one brother. He's my only brother.
We were quite close when we were kids. He was
a very good big brother, five years older than me.
Always had time. I'm gonna get choked up a little bit.
He always had time. He didn't die, by the way,
(11:32):
in case you're wondering, he always had time to play
hot wheels or he taught me how to throw a baseball.
He taught me how to throw a football. We'd go
out in the yard and he was like, you know,
too big. I was like, you know, probably nine years
old and he would have been fourteen. And you know
he played football with me and you know, hot wheels
and all that shit. Yeah, and he was a really good, gentle, kind,
(11:56):
sweet big brother. And you know, we get older and
you move and you don't really stay in touch like
you used to. And we still talk once every couple
of months or so, and you know, we'll laugh about
the things mom and dad used to do or say,
I remember the time mom and dad did this, and
you know, what are you up to house the kids?
Blah blah blah. Well, his wife had been sick for
(12:17):
about ten years, and long story short, she died rather
suddenly on Sunday afternoon. And I'm just my heart just
breaks for him. Yeah, because you know, he's got two
grown kids. One lives about one hundred miles away, one
lives a couple one thousand miles away. Wow, and he'll
(12:39):
be all alone now.
Speaker 2 (12:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (12:41):
And he's still quite young, he's only about sixty five
ish or so, and so he and I just feel
so bad for him. Yeah, And it's like this is
the person they've been married for forty six forty five years.
Speaker 3 (12:55):
I know. That always makes me so sad because it's like, yes,
I can see like the value in being with someone.
I always think the same thing with like oh, if
I'm making a commitment to you know, I'm going to
buy this cat, but the cat's going to die someday,
or like I want to get married, but my wife
might die someday. And it's just like it's so sad
(13:15):
because it makes you, I don't know, being I mean him,
the thought of him being alone. Like anytime I see
just like one little old man sitting at a table alone,
I'm like, oh, I wonder what happened?
Speaker 1 (13:25):
Oh my god, and it makes me so sad. We
were in Arlington, Minnesota, and there's a I think we
rode the motorcycles out. There's a restaurant called Arlington House
and it's a great little place and it's where it's
like the local restaurant. Yeah, the locals come in. And
we were out there year or two ago and there's
a old man, I mean old, like eighty five years old,
(13:48):
eating at a booth by himself, and I thought, I'm
sure the story is him and his wife lived in Arlington,
are around here for years and years, married when they
were twenty. Kids are grown or gone or whatever, and
his wife is gone, so he doesn't cook for himself.
He comes down to the Arlington House. Yeah, and I
was just sad. But you know, when that's true, it's
like when you buy a dog or a cat. You
(14:10):
got years and years ahead of you, so it's worth it.
Speaker 3 (14:13):
It's totally so it's worth it, you know, finding someone
you love and getting married versus being like, well, one
day they'll die.
Speaker 2 (14:19):
But you always have that little, that little thought in
your brain like, well why bother when someday they're going
to be gone?
Speaker 3 (14:26):
You know?
Speaker 1 (14:26):
Yeah, But I would never do that with Bernie. I
mean I had the heartbreak of losing my little doggy Josie.
She was my buddy. She was like us for sixteen years.
And then you know, Bernie is three, and I don't
look so far down the road exactly has to be like, oh,
he's gonna die in ten years. I just love my
Bernie boy the way he is now. Love what you
(14:47):
have while you have it, you know, but you do
you look at you know, you look at like you know,
you get to a certain age and more people start dying. Yeah,
and I've seen a lot of people like Paddy Birts
died a couple of years ago. He was a big
guy on our show for years, and of some other
people that have been on KWB have died. And you know,
(15:08):
you start looking around going, oh God, they're falling, Like
what is that like stalks of corn in a harvest?
It is like Jesus Chase anyway, like flies?
Speaker 2 (15:19):
Isn't that what it is?
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Yeah? Should I I'm sending my brother flowers. Yeah, I'm
going to send him a door Dash gift card. Also,
is that a weird thing to send him? Trying to
think of, like, you know, send candles.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
In a you Does he know how to use Dash?
Speaker 1 (15:34):
Oh he's pretty savvy.
Speaker 2 (15:35):
Yeah, so then yeah, I think that's normal. Are you
going there for like a funeral?
Speaker 1 (15:40):
I don't know if there is one yet, but I
probably should go there. He's only in Omaha four hours away. Yeah,
so I should go and maybe spend a night or something.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
Yeah, just to hang out with your brother.
Speaker 1 (15:50):
Yeah, okay, Well, anyway, on a happier note. On a
happier note, it's Justin Guarini's birthday today. Oh happy, just
forty seven years old to that, so young. I still
remember on American Idol. I think what lost it for
him was this. It was him and Kelly Clarkson, they
(16:11):
were the two finalists and Simon was criticizing Justin Guarini
had come out and sang a song and it did
and then afterward they remember they'd go through and Paula,
Randy and Simon would each give a critique and Simon
was like, you know, I thought you were a little pitchy.
And bab blah blah blah blah, and Justin said to Simon,
he goes, I appreciate that, I really do. But then
(16:33):
he just gestured out to the crowd and he said,
but what do you guys think?
Speaker 2 (16:36):
I remember that? Do you? I remember that? Yeah? And
that was a really bad look.
Speaker 1 (16:40):
It was a really bad look. And I think if
anything cost Justin Guarini American Idol, it was that moment
by discounting what Simon said, yeah, and then saying, yeah,
but what do you guys think? And of course all
the girls went yes.
Speaker 3 (16:55):
I think what did him in is that he was
up against Kelly Clarkson and Kelly clark like a legend.
Speaker 1 (17:01):
And that is it for the Minnesota Goodbye Ryan Show
at KDWB dot com.
Minnesota Goodbye. Somebody texted during the radio show this morning, said,
what's the address for the Minnesota Goodbye? And it's funny
because we always give it at the end of the podcast,
but never at the beginning. And I know that there
is definitely a pattern of people who will listen to
the first part of a podcast but not all the
way through the end. So the address to get on
the Minnesota Goodbye is Ryan's show at KADIWB dot com.
(00:23):
And if we read your email, and we've never read
an email from you before, and you want a staff
writer sticker, it's an attractive little sticker.
Speaker 2 (00:31):
It is.
Speaker 1 (00:31):
It's a round, it's about the size of the pall
me your hand or a little bit smaller, and it
says official staff writer Minnesota Goodbye. Stick it on your yetty.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
Yeah, put that on your resume too, because you're a
staff writer.
Speaker 1 (00:45):
We do have an email to start things off, a
couple of emails at Ryans show at KATWB dot com.
Hello there, morning show crew. By the way, Jenny's presenting
down the hall, so she's not on what is she
presenting about media?
Speaker 2 (00:56):
About social media something?
Speaker 3 (00:58):
She might come in at some point, but I don't
know okay, she might get asked a lot of questions.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
Uh.
Speaker 1 (01:03):
Hearing the rant about people assuming you're pregnant reminded me
of a time that happened to me. For context, my
kids are two and four and this happened within the
last month. I walked into a small wedding that served
champagne before the ceremony, and the server Tanya handed one
to my husband and then said, I have sparkling juice
for you. Oh, And I responded with nope, I'm just fat,
(01:23):
and she says, oh girl, I got you, and she
handed me champagne. She came over a few minutes later
to refill my glass and nobody else's. Tanya hooked me
up with the entire night. My glass was never empty
from that point forward. She gave me the extras of
the best apps, and she even showed me the best
bathroom to use. She definitely turned a faux pas into
a great night for me. Enjoy your day, all right,
(01:46):
from Cali.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
That's cute.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
I do like that she was just like, Nope, just fat,
because that's that's the kind of response you always want
to give when somebody says make the comment about the
way you look and you're like, Oh, let's turn it
around and make it weird for you.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
Yeah, we were talking about this the other day on
the show, like What Stuck with You? And I had
talked about when I was in about fifth grade. My
best friend's older sister said I had a snoopy belly,
and it didn't really bother me because it's kind of true.
I'm sway back and I don't stand up straight. I
don't put my shoulders back. I kind of leaned back
like this, and it looks like but I've always remembered that.
(02:20):
So we did What Stuck with You? Nate writes in
I was wondering if you had any resolution to your
Paul McCartney ticket situation. Really quick story. We paid a
lot of money for our tickets. They screwed them up somehow,
and they sat us in a section where I'm all
but positive they ripped us off. They didn't mean to,
(02:42):
but they gave us tickets in a okay section. When
we played, paid for the best seats in the house,
and they gave us a wristband which allowed us on
the floor. But we were not on the floor and
the people around us did not have wristbands, so Nate
goes on to say, if it happened to me, I
don't know if I would have been able to enjoy
the content, Sir, I'd just be constantly thinking about how
(03:02):
I paid top dollar for tickets and got downgraded. I'm
also curious how helpful or unhelpful Ticketmaster or US Bank
Stadium wasn't dealing with this. You know what, Thanks for
the reminder. I'm going to write myself a note. The
reason I haven't done anything is because I'm almost certain
they won't be able to help me. Yeah. It was
(03:24):
when we got our seats. I mean, we were so excited.
I always bring binoculars to a concert because I want
to see Yeah, and this time I didn't because I
thought he's going to be right there. And when we
got our seats, I was like, are you kidding? Fuck?
But then I thought I'm not going to let this
ruin the experience. What I should have done, and I
don't know why I didn't, was get up and go
(03:45):
back and say this is not right. But I sat
there like a dumb ass and didn't do anything about it.
Speaker 3 (03:52):
I wonder if you did have access to the floor,
but they didn't explain how your access to the floor worked,
so like you never got to enjoy that part, you know,
because why give you a risk?
Speaker 2 (04:02):
Bar, I don't know, you know, that's what I There's.
Speaker 1 (04:04):
One woman in particular that I know that she she
was the one who fucked it up. And I remember
because we went to the box office blah blah blah
because our tickets wouldn't scan blah blah blah, and the
guy at the box office didn't know, so he went
and got a supervisor, and then she went and got
us the wrong tickets and a wristband to get on
(04:26):
the floor. Yeah, so Nate, I appreciate it. Yeah, we
tried not to let it bother us, but it it did.
Because we're not talking about one hundred dollars difference. We're
talking about about a fifteen hundred dollars indifference price yeh
each each each Bailey. So we probably lost about three
(04:47):
thousand dollars in that whole concert.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Geez.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
But it was Paul McCartney.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
And Paul McCartney you love him.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
So we were talking about because we looked at the
email stack here and there's really not a lot and
some days that's just how it is. So we thought, well,
what else can we talk about. We're going to talk
about Bailey's Hinge experience.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
Oh okay, I'm great.
Speaker 3 (05:07):
I'm so excited, so as I mean, you don't have
a lot to relate to this, unfortunately, David. I'm sorry
you've never had to navigate the healscape that is Hinge.
So here's some fun facts about Hinge. You can only
have eight unanswered messages in your inbox, and then they
stop letting boys message you if you don't message them back, So.
Speaker 1 (05:28):
That means you're not participating, you're not interacting, so hey stop.
Speaker 3 (05:32):
But if you have a bunch of conversations going, you
just have to keep up all of these different conversations.
And I've mentioned this before, but some of these dudes
I'm getting like I have to scroll up and remind
myself what it is that we were talking about right now.
My favorite ones are Eric and Sam. Those are my
two favorites because I keep I'm pretty good at finding
(05:54):
out information about these people because all you're given is
their first name, and then you can find out like
what they do for a living, and then I just
go through their pictures and see if I can find
any like discerning information about their job based on pictures
because like I realize because some people are like that's
you're looking for something bad about them. No, I'm just
(06:15):
trying to learn more about them. That doesn't tell me
anything on their profile. Like some of these people too,
Like one guy is super active on Twitter, but he's
always in fights, Like he's in political fights on Twitter,
and I don't really want to date somebody who's in
political fights on Twitter, which he does not have in
his profile, so like of course he doesn't have that
in his profile, Like I'm a really heated dude on Twitter,
(06:39):
Like who I'm a hard pass on that. So yeah,
I'm just having random conversations. And then we're also supposed
to be waiting. When I say we, I mean women,
you're supposed to wait for them to ask you out,
like ask you to go through something.
Speaker 1 (06:51):
Why, I don't know. Is that a rule? Unhinge?
Speaker 3 (06:54):
I think that's you know, the quote unquote game is
that you wait for them to ask you out.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
Well, then why go against the grain and be somebody
who asked them out? I know, well, you are a
strong independent woman, I act like.
Speaker 3 (07:05):
What I'm trying my Well, then they'll like go like
days without talking to you. So you're like, oh, okay, well,
good thing I didn't ask you out because you clearly
don't care.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
I don't write to a guy and say, hey, want
to get lucky, meets you Cariboo.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
Want to get lucky.
Speaker 1 (07:18):
Yeah, he'll think that's funny.
Speaker 2 (07:19):
No, we won't. He'll think he's going to get some
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (07:21):
Then maybe he's going to get something. No, listen, you
sneak into the bathroom. CAB's been nothing's been easier. Really,
you go into the bathroom of Cariboo, you like, have
him lean over the sink, and you just give it
to him. Give it, give it to him over the sink.
I did give it. Boom but boom but boom. Well.
Speaker 3 (07:38):
I sat next to a like sort of a friend
acquaintance kind of person yesterday at this movie that I
went to go see because our friend directed it, and
he was telling me that he just broke up with
his girlfriend not that long ago of like four years, and.
Speaker 2 (07:50):
He's sad about it.
Speaker 3 (07:50):
And I'm like, oh, and we're here, we're here, we
are sitting together and sharing popcorn.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
Take him to the Cariboo. I could take him the
carend him over the sink and give it to him.
I boom boom ba boomy.
Speaker 2 (08:01):
Write that down, all right, wrote it down.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
But bend him over the sinker. Boom boom boom both.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
The sink boom boom boom bom boom bomb.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
Anyway, we had a really interesting conversation on the show
this morning, and we kept it as you know, I mean,
it was adult, but we tried not to make it dirty.
It was a woman who wrote in and she said,
her new boyfriend checks all the boxes, but he's really
bad at sex. Everything from he treats her boobs like
a squeeze ball as stress ball, he's finished really quick,
(08:30):
he doesn't go downtown, he doesn't do this, he doesn't
do that. And it's like we were just kind of
like baffled. Baffled that's the perfect word. How can an
adult be so clueless? You know, when it comes to sex,
when you're new at it, you don't really know what
you're doing. It's trial and error. But I think most
people want to please their partner because they get a
(08:54):
lot of enjoyment out of seeing that partner having a
great time. There's nothing more boring than looking down at
somebody who's like going I think I had a girl,
Rita Rita one set something like can you hurry up?
And I was like wow, really wow?
Speaker 3 (09:09):
Yeah, how long had it been? An hour and a half?
Because then I understand with Rita.
Speaker 1 (09:13):
I don't remember well, I mean maybe fifteen minutes or
something like that.
Speaker 2 (09:17):
Yeah, yeah, but an hour and a half, yeah, get
it over.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
Well it always cracked me up. But I was living
that song the other day, wet like the rain, Yes,
And it's all about this inexperienced guy that knows nothing
about sex talking about I want to make love to
you all night long. And it was based on like
all the like the the H R and B songs
of the early to mid nineties. Yeah, of some guy
who's twenty two years old talking about how he's the
best you're gonna ever have and we're going to make
(09:42):
love all night long. And it's like, no, nobody wants
to make love all night long. You get sore, you
get dried up, you get spent, you're sweaty, you got
a cramp in your hip because your leg has been
behind your neck the entire night. So yeah, but I
think some guys think, well, like I heard that. I
(10:04):
remember when I was in probably high school or college.
I was reading Penthouse Forum. Do you know what Penthouse
Forum is?
Speaker 2 (10:10):
I assume it's a boob magazine, but you were reading
it for the articles.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
A you write in. It's probably not around anymore. You
would write in about your sexual experience. I never thought
anything like this would happen to me, but I was
at a tennis tournament and three tennis coaches all came
on to me. We had a big four way naked pile,
So you write it. And somebody wrote in and they
said this, and I always remembered it. They said, if
she ever starts acting like it's feeling good, don't go
(10:37):
faster because a guy will be like, oh, it's working,
she's getting excited.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
I'm going to go faster, and then you ruin it.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
And then you ruin it because what she's telling you
is she's really enjoying what you're doing right now. I'll
just wrap up by saying, if you want to go
back and listen to that part of the show, it
was around eight o'clock on Tuesday morning, Yes, and it
was really interesting. We try not to make it too dirty.
Her big question was, you know the sex is not
good will the relationship survive even without good sack.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
Yeah, is that a deal breaker? And we had a
lot of people way in.
Speaker 1 (11:12):
So yeah, it was really interesting. So I'm not bringing
this up on the air because I mean I could.
I just have not, and I don't know if I will.
But my brother. I have one brother. He's my only brother.
We were quite close when we were kids. He was
a very good big brother, five years older than me.
Always had time. I'm gonna get choked up a little bit.
He always had time. He didn't die, by the way,
(11:32):
in case you're wondering, he always had time to play
hot wheels or he taught me how to throw a baseball.
He taught me how to throw a football. We'd go
out in the yard and he was like, you know,
too big. I was like, you know, probably nine years
old and he would have been fourteen. And you know
he played football with me and you know, hot wheels
and all that shit. Yeah, and he was a really good, gentle, kind,
(11:56):
sweet big brother. And you know, we get older and
you move and you don't really stay in touch like
you used to. And we still talk once every couple
of months or so, and you know, we'll laugh about
the things mom and dad used to do or say,
I remember the time mom and dad did this, and
you know, what are you up to house the kids?
Blah blah blah. Well, his wife had been sick for
(12:17):
about ten years, and long story short, she died rather
suddenly on Sunday afternoon. And I'm just my heart just
breaks for him. Yeah, because you know, he's got two
grown kids. One lives about one hundred miles away, one
lives a couple one thousand miles away. Wow, and he'll
(12:39):
be all alone now.
Speaker 2 (12:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (12:41):
And he's still quite young, he's only about sixty five
ish or so, and so he and I just feel
so bad for him. Yeah, And it's like this is
the person they've been married for forty six forty five years.
Speaker 3 (12:55):
I know. That always makes me so sad because it's like, yes,
I can see like the value in being with someone.
I always think the same thing with like oh, if
I'm making a commitment to you know, I'm going to
buy this cat, but the cat's going to die someday,
or like I want to get married, but my wife
might die someday. And it's just like it's so sad
(13:15):
because it makes you, I don't know, being I mean him,
the thought of him being alone. Like anytime I see
just like one little old man sitting at a table alone,
I'm like, oh, I wonder what happened?
Speaker 1 (13:25):
Oh my god, and it makes me so sad. We
were in Arlington, Minnesota, and there's a I think we
rode the motorcycles out. There's a restaurant called Arlington House
and it's a great little place and it's where it's
like the local restaurant. Yeah, the locals come in. And
we were out there year or two ago and there's
a old man, I mean old, like eighty five years old,
(13:48):
eating at a booth by himself, and I thought, I'm
sure the story is him and his wife lived in Arlington,
are around here for years and years, married when they
were twenty. Kids are grown or gone or whatever, and
his wife is gone, so he doesn't cook for himself.
He comes down to the Arlington House. Yeah, and I
was just sad. But you know, when that's true, it's
like when you buy a dog or a cat. You
(14:10):
got years and years ahead of you, so it's worth it.
Speaker 3 (14:13):
It's totally so it's worth it, you know, finding someone
you love and getting married versus being like, well, one
day they'll die.
Speaker 2 (14:19):
But you always have that little, that little thought in
your brain like, well why bother when someday they're going
to be gone?
Speaker 3 (14:26):
You know?
Speaker 1 (14:26):
Yeah, But I would never do that with Bernie. I
mean I had the heartbreak of losing my little doggy Josie.
She was my buddy. She was like us for sixteen years.
And then you know, Bernie is three, and I don't
look so far down the road exactly has to be like, oh,
he's gonna die in ten years. I just love my
Bernie boy the way he is now. Love what you
(14:47):
have while you have it, you know, but you do
you look at you know, you look at like you know,
you get to a certain age and more people start dying. Yeah,
and I've seen a lot of people like Paddy Birts
died a couple of years ago. He was a big
guy on our show for years, and of some other
people that have been on KWB have died. And you know,
(15:08):
you start looking around going, oh God, they're falling, Like
what is that like stalks of corn in a harvest?
It is like Jesus Chase anyway, like flies?
Speaker 2 (15:19):
Isn't that what it is?
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Yeah? Should I I'm sending my brother flowers. Yeah, I'm
going to send him a door Dash gift card. Also,
is that a weird thing to send him? Trying to
think of, like, you know, send candles.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
In a you Does he know how to use Dash?
Speaker 1 (15:34):
Oh he's pretty savvy.
Speaker 2 (15:35):
Yeah, so then yeah, I think that's normal. Are you
going there for like a funeral?
Speaker 1 (15:40):
I don't know if there is one yet, but I
probably should go there. He's only in Omaha four hours away. Yeah,
so I should go and maybe spend a night or something.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
Yeah, just to hang out with your brother.
Speaker 1 (15:50):
Yeah, okay, Well, anyway, on a happier note. On a
happier note, it's Justin Guarini's birthday today. Oh happy, just
forty seven years old to that, so young. I still
remember on American Idol. I think what lost it for
him was this. It was him and Kelly Clarkson, they
(16:11):
were the two finalists and Simon was criticizing Justin Guarini
had come out and sang a song and it did
and then afterward they remember they'd go through and Paula,
Randy and Simon would each give a critique and Simon
was like, you know, I thought you were a little pitchy.
And bab blah blah blah blah, and Justin said to Simon,
he goes, I appreciate that, I really do. But then
(16:33):
he just gestured out to the crowd and he said,
but what do you guys think?
Speaker 2 (16:36):
I remember that? Do you? I remember that? Yeah? And
that was a really bad look.
Speaker 1 (16:40):
It was a really bad look. And I think if
anything cost Justin Guarini American Idol, it was that moment
by discounting what Simon said, yeah, and then saying, yeah,
but what do you guys think? And of course all
the girls went yes.
Speaker 3 (16:55):
I think what did him in is that he was
up against Kelly Clarkson and Kelly clark like a legend.
Speaker 1 (17:01):
And that is it for the Minnesota Goodbye Ryan Show
at KDWB dot com.
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