Mojo Hates Joe's Apartment

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
All right, it is Mojo in the morning.

Speaker 2 (00:01):
So I was just recently visiting my son Joe, who
lives in Florida.

Speaker 1 (00:06):
The Joe Show.

Speaker 2 (00:07):
You can listen to them on ninety three to three
FLZ or in the afternoons on channel ninety five to five.
And it's the holiday season. And I thought to myself, Okay,
maybe my son is he's growing up and is a
you know, a nice young guy. Maybe he's got taste
because he never had taste before. Like if you went

(00:28):
into his apartments, you would see shoe racks all over
the place with a ton of Jordans on them or
Yeezy's and all that kinds of stuff. I don't hate it, Okay,
I know. And this has got to be what your
place looks like, because you and Joe are probably around
the same age. And then you would see he would
always he would have a closet full of jerseys, so

(00:49):
you'd have like a he would have more jerseys in
his closet than a foot locker would have.

Speaker 3 (00:54):
We already know how you feel about jerseys.

Speaker 2 (00:56):
Okay, guys wearing jerseys again, Joe and keV. They shouldn't
have another man's name on the back. Right, So then
you would go into another room that he would have
and he would have Star Wars things like star he had. Lydia,
you've been to Joe's apartment before. What was it that
he even like Darth Vader's mask.

Speaker 4 (01:16):
Yeah, he had those laying room, but he also had
Minion popcorn buckets laying across his like dining room table.

Speaker 3 (01:22):
Yes, yes, maybe they're collectibles.

Speaker 2 (01:25):
Lydia said to me when she went to go visit
those guys down in Tampa and she went over to
Joe's place, she said, it was really wild.

Speaker 1 (01:31):
There's like minions over the place.

Speaker 5 (01:34):
I was like, Alyssa, lets you have this year?

Speaker 1 (01:36):
He was like, yeah, why not? All right.

Speaker 2 (01:37):
Alyssa, by the way, is somebody that I thought was
going to be the She was going to be the solution.

Speaker 1 (01:42):
She may be the problem.

Speaker 5 (01:43):
Isn't she a huge Disney fan too?

Speaker 1 (01:45):
Well, she's turned into it. She's morphed into one.

Speaker 2 (01:47):
I don't know if she always was, but she definitely
has morphed into a big Disney adult. So I thought
to myself, Okay, now that Joe's getting married and eventually
they're going to have kids, right, I'm assuming that own
a Lissa will probably go quick and try to have kids,
and I think, Okay, they're gonna start clearing some of
this stuff out because I had stuff like this, like

(02:09):
I had autographed merch and I had jerseys, and I
mean I wore some of the worst clothes ever. Chelsea
literally went into my closet and cleaned it out. Like, honestly, now,
as a grown adult, I would not be able to
have as much lion stuff as I have right now
when we first got married, because Chelsea was like, you're
not wearing all that stuff. Now she's kind of given
up on me. So long story short, go into his apartment.

(02:31):
He's got more stuff, and then she's got it, and
I'm looking at it, going, what are they gonna do
when they have kids? People are gonna come over to
their house and think they're playing with their kids toys.

Speaker 6 (02:41):
They're not.

Speaker 1 (02:42):
They're the parents toys.

Speaker 5 (02:43):
That's their thing. That's what makes them happy, is.

Speaker 1 (02:46):
You know what it is?

Speaker 2 (02:47):
Honestly, it just shows you that our world is crazy.
Twenty somethings are literally playing with toys. Still, You're a
goddamn twenty something. What are you still playing with?

Speaker 1 (02:59):
Anna?

Speaker 4 (02:59):
I'm not trying to justify it. But some of these
things are collectibles. Like this guy that I used to see.
Do you know the bear brick bears? They look like toys,
but those are very expensive bears. Or like he had
a pac Man game in there.

Speaker 5 (03:14):
Kine, he has a bunch of that stuff in his room.

Speaker 3 (03:16):
Some of it is expensive arts. Kevin has stuffed animals
laying around.

Speaker 1 (03:21):
Yeah, why would you have a stuff?

Speaker 2 (03:23):
You know where stuffed animals belong at the fricking carnival
and then you bring them home and you throw them
in a garbage because they're made of asbestos.

Speaker 3 (03:31):
I have one stuffed animal.

Speaker 1 (03:32):
You do, yeah? From your childhood?

Speaker 3 (03:34):
No, I just got it when I moved to Detroit.
I just liked it. It's a little Yoda, and I
was like, I love Yoda. Why not? Guy should put
it in Joe's apartment.

Speaker 1 (03:42):
You should show you. Guys should compare.

Speaker 4 (03:44):
Yoga probably has a million jelly cat I mean they're
my kids.

Speaker 1 (03:47):
Oh right, you don't have any of yourself, do you.

Speaker 5 (03:51):
I may have bought one this weekend for myself. It
was real cute. I don't know, put it on put
it on a chair, I don't know.

Speaker 1 (04:01):
You're gonna put it on a chair and just look
at it.

Speaker 5 (04:02):
Yeah, cute, it's cute.

Speaker 1 (04:05):
Do you you have a financial advisor, you have anybody
that's telling you how to spend your money at all?

Speaker 5 (04:09):
I have a friend who is given.

Speaker 4 (04:13):
If it doesn't bring you joy getting maybe it's all
bringing Joe Joe.

Speaker 5 (04:17):
That's right.

Speaker 1 (04:18):
See, hey, can you.

Speaker 7 (04:19):
Run by the way, still have autographed stuff in your
house that is yours?

Speaker 2 (04:25):
I have ready worth money, Tom Brady autographed super Bowl.

Speaker 7 (04:29):
Okay, still an autographed piece of sports memorabilia, A.

Speaker 2 (04:33):
Mcguil Cabrera triple Crown autograph Jersey golf club, Tiger Woods
autographed golf club, Michael Jordan autographed jersey.

Speaker 7 (04:43):
What I'm hearing is those are auto that those are
pieces of autographed sports memorabilia.

Speaker 3 (04:48):
Those are man toys.

Speaker 7 (04:49):
So if it's expensive and worth something, then it's okay, Lydia.

Speaker 2 (04:53):
Uh, just peek your head out into Joe's studio and
just see when they're going on a break, because he said.

Speaker 3 (04:57):
He's gonna come by in like two minutes.

Speaker 2 (04:59):
Okay, so you can come by. I want him to
defend himself. A four to four Mojo live eight four
four six six five six five four eight. At what
point in your life do you have to grow up?
And at what point in your life? Like, you can't
decorate a Christmas tree with toys, you got to decorate
it with nice ornaments, Like I want one day to
be able to be proud of my son as he
brings children into this world and not walk into his

(05:22):
house and say there are no room for children because
he's got freaking lightsabers all over there.

Speaker 7 (05:28):
I saw something, though, I kind of love the Christmas
trees that are all decorated with like toys and retro
and nostalgia, because we we got so far away from that.

Speaker 5 (05:36):
That's what a Christmas tree was.

Speaker 7 (05:37):
And then everybody, myself included, started doing like the neutral,
aesthetically pleasing Christmas trees. And this year I went back
to the colored lights and all the crap on the tree,
and it makes me so happy.

Speaker 2 (05:50):
I was going to say, you know what I'm doing,
I'm gonna buy a bunch of this crap or get
it from Joe and I'm gonna give it to Smith
and see if you can get no.

Speaker 7 (05:57):
Our Christmas tree this year is it's so it's so fun,
it's so colorful, it's all the kid's stuff.

Speaker 1 (06:02):
Hey Anna, listener, Anna, what's going on?

Speaker 8 (06:06):
So?

Speaker 9 (06:06):
I am twenty four, so not quite as old as Joe,
but somewhere in the middle senior kids and I have
like ten Christmas jelly cats sitting out right now.

Speaker 5 (06:16):
I love you. We should be friends.

Speaker 1 (06:18):
Do you bring the little glove?

Speaker 5 (06:20):
The little blue glove this year is so dangute?

Speaker 9 (06:22):
That's what I have. I have that one. It's so cute.

Speaker 5 (06:25):
Can actually put your hand in it?

Speaker 2 (06:26):
Do you bring my boys over to your house or
girls over, depending on what your preference is.

Speaker 9 (06:32):
I mean, me and my boyfriend have been dating for
over five years and we lived together, so he just.

Speaker 1 (06:37):
Deals with it. Yeah, oh god.

Speaker 2 (06:40):
Do you have your parents ever over just to kind
of like have them over for dinner or anything like that.

Speaker 9 (06:45):
Yeah, they come over sometimes. They My mom just kind of.

Speaker 10 (06:48):
Accepts it at this point.

Speaker 9 (06:50):
My dad doesn't really even notice them, but that's okay.

Speaker 2 (06:54):
He thinks she's walking into little Anna's childhood room when
she was twelve years old.

Speaker 1 (06:59):
What's up, Jay? How you doing?

Speaker 6 (07:02):
You sound like the greensh over here. I'm listening to
you talking about your son and his toys. You remind
me the old man in those old Christmas movies, The
Great Food, Pumpy Dude.

Speaker 2 (07:10):
Yeah, Hey, quick question for you, Jay, how old are
you and how many toys do you still have?

Speaker 6 (07:20):
I am thirty two years old and I don't have
no toys. But if they st't have toys and that's
their happiness, let them do that.

Speaker 2 (07:26):
The only toy that you should have as a grown
ass adult is one that you buy at.

Speaker 1 (07:32):
That Just say Priscilla's.

Speaker 7 (07:36):
Spencer, which also sells sex toys. I learned over the weekend.

Speaker 2 (07:40):
Joe only needs a pocket pee, That's all he needs.
Oh my god, what's going on?

Speaker 1 (07:44):
Angie? How you doing?

Speaker 3 (07:46):
Mojo?

Speaker 1 (07:47):
Who hurts you?

Speaker 11 (07:48):
Brown?

Speaker 12 (07:50):
What is going on? I am fifty three years old.
I'll be fifty four in February.

Speaker 1 (07:55):
Yeah.

Speaker 12 (07:56):
I have Lego sets, I have coloring books, insults, I
have puzzles. I don't see anything wrong with embracing your
inner child. We all have one. You need to find yours?

Speaker 1 (08:09):
Bro is dead. You know what I have? I have
golf clubs.

Speaker 8 (08:14):
Uh?

Speaker 1 (08:14):
You know I have?

Speaker 5 (08:15):
Do you still play video games?

Speaker 8 (08:17):
No?

Speaker 5 (08:18):
You went through that phase.

Speaker 1 (08:19):
I did. I went through. I went to I gave up.

Speaker 2 (08:22):
I gave up video games when Luke was born twenty
years ago because one morning Chelsea had to go downstairs
and get me at about four o'clock in the morning
on a Saturday, and I hadn't been to bed yet.

Speaker 1 (08:33):
So I'm sorry.

Speaker 2 (08:35):
I apologize for being a grange or you know, not
having a child.

Speaker 9 (08:39):
I love you, I love you.

Speaker 1 (08:41):
We love you, to love you too.

Speaker 9 (08:43):
I love all you guys.

Speaker 2 (08:44):
We love you that.

Speaker 1 (08:45):
I love you too. Wait, hold on, I saw Jed
walk out? Did Joe walk out yet?

Speaker 5 (08:49):
I haven't seen they're.

Speaker 1 (08:50):
In our studio. I want to.

Speaker 2 (08:51):
I want to get a chance to bring him in
here to defend himself to court. Hold on a second, here, David,
are you there, David.

Speaker 8 (08:59):
Yes, sir, first time, long.

Speaker 1 (09:00):
Time on the phone. Yeah, what's going on?

Speaker 8 (09:05):
Good morning, Good morning everybody.

Speaker 10 (09:07):
But yeah, on the toy collecting thing, I'm forty one,
about to be forty two in January, and I have
about forty wrestling Action figures. O.

Speaker 1 (09:18):
God.

Speaker 10 (09:20):
Yeah, I collect them, you know, I collect them and
they sit on my shelf and you know, it's a hobby.

Speaker 3 (09:26):
Are they worth anything?

Speaker 1 (09:29):
They will be yeah? Are you know in time?

Speaker 8 (09:32):
Yeah, like when my ten year old is thirty, they
might be worth the money.

Speaker 1 (09:36):
So you're are you a married man with kids?

Speaker 10 (09:40):
I will be married in twenty twenty seven. We got engaged.

Speaker 8 (09:45):
This year on our anniversary, and we're gonna get married
on our anniversary.

Speaker 2 (09:51):
So does she get rid of all that crap or
does she have her own version of toys?

Speaker 8 (09:56):
No, she didn't get rid of none of it.

Speaker 10 (09:59):
She actually in urges me to do it.

Speaker 1 (10:01):
Wow, you found.

Speaker 5 (10:02):
I can hear her in the background.

Speaker 1 (10:04):
He let me talk to her. Put her on. What's
your name? She's not with me right now, she's not.

Speaker 8 (10:13):
She's out dashing right now.

Speaker 1 (10:14):
Actually, okay, what's her name out there? Dasher? Jamie Jones,
Jamie Jones, the dasher. I want you to call us
up and tell us.

Speaker 5 (10:23):
Wait a second, what's the name of the girl in
the car next to you?

Speaker 1 (10:26):
There is no girl in the car now.

Speaker 11 (10:30):
Laugh.

Speaker 1 (10:30):
I heard a woman laughing.

Speaker 5 (10:31):
Hey, let me ask you a question.

Speaker 3 (10:33):
Maybe it was a kid.

Speaker 7 (10:34):
If you had a dozen three roses to send to
anybody in the country, anywhere in the country, who would
you send it to?

Speaker 1 (10:41):
Joan good answer? All right, thanks for the call, buddy,
I appreciate you. You guys have a good by all.

Speaker 3 (10:48):
Right, off the line real quick.

Speaker 1 (10:50):
After that, do.

Speaker 7 (10:51):
You get so mad when nobody takes your side? You know, Shannon,
He's like, I'm done with this topic. We're going to
move on to something else.

Speaker 1 (11:00):
Maybe I should just retire.

Speaker 8 (11:01):
You know.

Speaker 2 (11:03):
They used to like me. They used to take my
eye on this one. Honestly, I get it if you
want to have fun, yeah, But I also I'm like,
oh Jesus Christ, I never got to do that.

Speaker 5 (11:13):
Like I you know, different world, but you also you
also to be fair. I think this is where it
stems from with you. I really do.

Speaker 7 (11:20):
I'm going to be your therapist for a second. You
had to grow up really quickly. Your mom died, your
dad kicked you out of the house, so you didn't
have a chance to even probably keep some of these
items from you.

Speaker 1 (11:30):
On my back.

Speaker 2 (11:31):
Yeah, and Paton, so real, Oka, I want to ask
you this, so you're okay, you got you've been married twice,
two men, all right, Andrew West, Yes, if you're marrying
these guys and I'm picturing Joe marrying Melissa, and you
know that with them you get them in Star Wars
Disney and what was it again, Lydia that you saw

(11:54):
minyons minions honestly, would you let West run coming to
your life with millions?

Speaker 7 (12:01):
Wasn't allowed to come in with his own couch and
bad drum sat, so no, it was all gone.

Speaker 2 (12:08):
Listen, he's now getting to decorate the tree as much
as he wants to. He finally gets a tree that's actually,
you know, not something you see in a pottery barn,
you know at But hold on, my son just walked
in the studio.

Speaker 1 (12:22):
Look at the smile and welcome my son, Jo.

Speaker 11 (12:25):
He said, I had to get in and you were
talking smack about something.

Speaker 2 (12:28):
You're moving my cameras, so yeah, stop moving my cameras.
I don't go into your studio and started banging your Joe.

Speaker 7 (12:34):
He made a statement and not one single person, including
any listeners, agreed with him.

Speaker 5 (12:38):
So then he moved on from the topic.

Speaker 2 (12:40):
Oh really, yes, I want to move on and from
the topic because I talked about how you still have
all these childhood decorations, it seems like around your place,
and I thought, being with Alyssa like a nice woman,
that you would get rid of these things and grow
up a little bit.

Speaker 11 (12:55):
But I guess you're not, absolutely not, because she fell
into it very quick, learned very fast the first night
she ever stayed. The night I woke up a little
bit before her, and I tried to hide everything, and
I peaked my head up and I saw Grogu Little
Yoda standing right over my bed with my necklaces on it.
And uh, that was her introduction into me being this way.

Speaker 2 (13:20):
Yes, talk to us about Lydia says that you have
minions in your apartment too.

Speaker 1 (13:25):
I have minions. I have not Star Wars action figures.

Speaker 5 (13:32):
Don't you haven't.

Speaker 11 (13:33):
Don't I've got, like, name a character in Star Wars.
I have their lights, saber, Harry Potter wands.

Speaker 1 (13:41):
No, what do you think? I'm a nerd?

Speaker 11 (13:45):
And don't admit that that's embarrassing. That's embarrassing. I've got
a whole bunch of stuff. I've got helmets, I've.

Speaker 5 (13:54):
Got what about Disney stuff?

Speaker 1 (13:56):
Uh? Star Wars? I mean, I know, like Mouse, Who's
and everything? Mickey Mouse?

Speaker 11 (14:02):
Yeah, I got a Mickey Mouse statue in the statue,
I've got one of them. My whole entire Christmas tree
is pretty much Disney.

Speaker 5 (14:12):
Jo tell us more about your popcorn.

Speaker 11 (14:14):
But I can't hear your drops, So there's no reason
that she wants she says, no, that was Lydia speaking.

Speaker 1 (14:19):
She wants you to talk about your popcorn. Yeah, he's sick.
He wants you to talk about the She wants you
to talk about the popcorn.

Speaker 5 (14:25):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (14:25):
How many of those do you have?

Speaker 1 (14:26):
The Disney popcorn buckets? Well, all combined?

Speaker 11 (14:29):
I would ask, oh, God, at least like at least twenty.

Speaker 4 (14:37):
Do these things hold value or some of them do?

Speaker 1 (14:41):
I have a lot.

Speaker 11 (14:42):
I do have some things that are worth a decent
amount of money, but I don't It's like Jordan's I
don't resell them.

Speaker 2 (14:47):
Why don't you become a man like Jed and have
shotguns in your place?

Speaker 3 (14:51):
Jet's place look.

Speaker 1 (14:53):
Like Jed's place looks like racism.

Speaker 2 (14:55):
Yeah, no, it's it's a kind of iniquity.

Speaker 3 (14:58):
What does that even mean?

Speaker 1 (15:00):
A confederate.

Speaker 2 (15:02):
There's a reason why our friend Gooch calls it the
outpost calls the penthouse house. Got all right, I gotta
I gotta end this whole thing. And this is still
childish and wrong, and I don't condone it. And I
will tell you this about Alyssa. She loves it now,
but wait until you No, she gets more power.

Speaker 11 (15:24):
I did notice when we decorated for Christmas this year. Uh,
everything was set up and it was really beautiful. And
then I went into the storage closet to grab something
and I saw that there was still Christmas decoration.

Speaker 1 (15:36):
What is this?

Speaker 11 (15:36):
And I opened it up and it was all my
Star Wars.

Speaker 1 (15:39):
She's gonna get rid of it. What's up, Cheyenne?

Speaker 8 (15:41):
Hi?

Speaker 6 (15:43):
Hey, I just wanted to say that you would hate
to see a man cave. That's exactly what you're describing.

Speaker 2 (15:50):
Hey, listen, have it in a man cave, don't have
it in your entire place. He's got a two bedroom,
two bath apartment with nothing but this stuff in it.

Speaker 1 (15:58):
So it's okay, joy and whimsical. Yes, he dies. He
hates me being happy. I love you, Cheyenne. Thank you
for Hi. This is Joey and you listen to my
Dan Mojo. It gets mojo in the morning. Please don't
turn off the station because I need to eat tonight
A Channel nine