The Real Reason Why Black Women Single Compared To Other Races Of Women.

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
She ain't knew it is, and she scared it is.

Speaker 2 (00:22):
She's been used to it.

Speaker 1 (00:26):
Could try to reach her over. She's used to swerving
so good. Not of fact, she's not enough to go
prob like to row with fell this because they are
just love it and she'll never deep the city. Isn't
that time you want a front of Jason people that

(00:49):
the doo.

Speaker 3 (00:49):
Can playing your cavcer even defeating of paper, She.

Speaker 1 (00:56):
Tells you see leader to the English, she am playing
did you creep persuada? She didn't feels like paper? In
another way, she pronounced my name like come on to
the yamas. It is from another Alma pro fano it
is halma. Yeah, it's them is not a fussy, but

(01:21):
canna always get PIANSI pet like not okay, happen you
don't want from Don's You put that bogan playing.

Speaker 3 (01:32):
You can't make her then maybe it must paper.

Speaker 1 (01:37):
She tells you see later to tell me that she's
a playing did you creep persuade? She doesn't feels like paper.
Look the hawk and all for men go loose. Make
your plan dunco come sino const go.

Speaker 2 (01:57):
Yes, it's kisspre okay, I'm so se i won't even
like to you. I still shake my phone for replies
from you. Whish I didn't re starler that time.

Speaker 1 (02:19):
Now I can't get my mind off you, but I
can't see it. Cry for you with the only one
you know, and I feel a can't put say I
know um saying specially shoe the best. If you don't
want a front, don't she's a pimple like the.

Speaker 3 (02:41):
Loogan playing You can't they even if it.

Speaker 1 (02:47):
Imp of paper. If she tells you sea, don't believe
that she's a player, she'll convince you a great PURSUITA
so she does appears like paper.

Speaker 3 (03:37):
Bout by the botthing bout about both by the body
bout the bout.

Speaker 1 (04:08):
Hello, Hello, Hello, everybody, Welcome to Tell Like It Is
Radio podcast on my channels, on my tablet and laptop
and on my speaker dot com. Welcome to African melanin Queens.
I'm your host. Y'all know who I am. By now,

(04:30):
I appreciate y'all for joining me for this episode. If
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(04:54):
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as well. Also, you cant in my podcast on Spotify, iHeartRadio, Amazon, Google,
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(05:17):
little bit about me. I am a cutif recovery life coach.
It's all about people on their baths, their journeys, and
their purpose through new and better youth through self discovery.
I'm all about helping people when it comes to dealing
with reality and not being blinded or confused by your

(05:39):
version of things, because your version of things can backfire miserably.
Now only that, I'm also a mental and well being
practitioner as well, just got certified. So I'm so proud
of myself. So if you guys are doing good, me,
I'm doing great. It's been a minute. It's nothing on
this podcast, and I know it's been a while. There's

(06:00):
been a lot that's been going on, and I'm gonna
talk about that. But I'm also gonna talk about this
particular topic of why black women in particular are single.
And it's gonna be a very interesting conversation because this
whole in time, this whole entime season, it's gonna be
why are Black women single? So why y'all have not

(06:23):
seen me in a good little minute is because I've
been having thyroid issues and throw issues, and I have
not really been able to talk very much. So I
have been able to be on here, and I wanted
to be able to give all of my podcasts one
hundred percent of my attention in my time, and also

(06:44):
with this podcast, I was trying to figure out what
direction I was gonna go with it because so many
different African American podcasts that trash black women, blame black
women for everything, and there's just this battle of the
sexist and I didn't really want to do that. I
wanted to do something a little bit different. I wanted

(07:05):
to do something where not only do we talk about
the problems and relationships, but we also talk about solutions
in these situations. I didn't just want to be where
it would just be a situation where we're just bashing,
you know, African American people. I wanted it to be

(07:26):
able to talk about not only the problem, but also
some solutions from different perspectives, because anything, when it comes
to Black women in the United States in particular, we
are all different. Not every Black woman is out here
sleeping around with everybody mama, and even in women in general,

(07:48):
all women of all races are different. You have the
good girl, the bad girl. You got the girl that's
trying to find her way. You have females that are
captain sable whole, buildebears, builde dolls, seat fellers, and people pleasers.
You have people that will do anything to be lovelike, appreciated, value,
wanted and needed to be a part of something, to

(08:10):
be validated, to be approved of, to be accepted for someone,
to know your worth, and to pretty much prove something
to people as well as you know, just trying to
fit in where you belong. There are a lot of
women that are naive and very inexperienced. There's a lot
of women that are trifling and jealous and hating on

(08:33):
other women, trying to steal somebody else's husband. You have
women out here that have unlived people. You have women
out here that are very promiscuous. The har lit, the Succubists,
and the Jezebel you know syndrome. So women are different,
We're not all the same. So the fact that black

(08:54):
women in particular are categorized in the same you know,
as far as as the way we think, the way
we treat men is really insulting because black women are
not the same. There are Black women out here who
do cook and clean and do everything, and they're supposed to,
but they're just not chosen. You got black women out

(09:16):
here who are not about infidelity, not out here being
with multiple men, whose body counts are low because they're
unattractive and men don't find them attractive. So at the
end of the day, like I said, there are women
out here that will be there for a man, that
will support him, that will build him, and then when

(09:36):
they do, they end up getting left for the women
that they really do want. There are women out here that, yes,
they do get pregnant for the bag. And yes, there
are Instagram people that's out here basically wanting attention and
even though they got a man at home, they're still
wanting and craving attention from other men. Yes, all of
this stuff is accurate. I'm not saying that it's not.

(09:57):
So don't get me wrong, I am not sitting up
here saying that I don't understand or relate to some
when it comes to men and what their grievances are.
But at the same time, men are the ones that
created the sex industry as a whole. Men are the
ones that have been telling women for years they wanted
them to be more promiscuous. And now that they have been,

(10:20):
and now that these women got kids, now you're saying, oh,
because you've had children, now you know you're spoiled goods
and you have the scarlet letter on you, or because
you're older, no man is gonna want you. That's absolutely
ridiculous at this point. And at this point, I don't

(10:40):
care if men want me or not. If you would
like me, to be honest, I really don't care. At
the end of the day, I'm not gonna sit up
here and worry about whether some man won't me or not,
because I could care less about that anyway. At the
end of the day. The biggest problem is the black
community is completely and utterly lost at this point. Lost.

(11:00):
At the end of the day, we went from the
Harlem Renaissance to the ghetto. We went from living in
Africa to now being from indigenous servants to now slaves
and now police brutality. At the end of the day,
like I said, you know, every woman is different, and
every woman in the Black community needs to be represented

(11:21):
in all aspects. Like I said, there are women out
here that will sleep with somebody's husband, They will sleep
somebody's men. There are women that are in the sex industry.
There are women out here that are very promiscuous. I'm
not saying these women ain't out there, but at the
same time, y'all need to stop treating other women that
don't have anything to do with any of this like

(11:41):
we're one of them. Every woman is different. So when
it comes to being single, there's multiple different reasons why
Black women are single. It's not because every Black woman
has an attitude. Guess certainly ain't why. And it's certainly
not because every black woman is permission or running around
having multiple kids. There are women that don't have any

(12:05):
kids and only have one child, and they are pretty
much out here doing the best they can to raise
their kids. And not only that, the average women in general,
Black women in Pasicla have children between the ages of
nine or eight. Years old to the age of twenty two,
and some of them have multiple kids by then, so,

(12:28):
in other words, that young woman was once a young girl.
So how in the world are y'all gonna say that
a young girl should know how to pick a good
man when majority of black women don't have their fathers,
so they don't have an example of what a good
man is and their mama's boyfriend is molesting and sexually

(12:51):
assaulting them, then don't you think that that's a problem.
When you have black black women who basically have dealt
with abuse from their mothers and their mother's been pimping
them out, do you really think they gonna know what
a healthy relationship when they're watching their mom get beaten

(13:12):
and basically mistreated and then the boyfriend is molesting their daughter.
Do you think that young girl's gonna have a really
good experience when it comes to men. I mean, then
you got young boys telling females, if you love me,
you'll have sex with me, and if she says no,
he'll just move onto the next chick, And then she
ends up trying to get him back, trying to convince

(13:34):
him that she is ready to have sex. Knowing for well,
she's not ready to have sex, and yet and still
you continue to try to peer pressure her. You got
young boys that make bets on women's virginy jays as
far as breaking their virginity. You have a lot of
men that when they have sex with a woman, they
will take the condom off and don't even tell her

(13:55):
that they took the condom off. And yet she gets
pregnant and it's her spam y'all. Lot of young girls
that have gotten pregnant after losing their virginity. You have
a lot of young girls that are pregnant by their
mama's boyfriend. So at the end of the day, like
I said, there are extenuating circumstances that contradicts a lot
of these platforms when they come to podcasts. So in

(14:19):
order for you to be able to really talk about
these different topics, you got to talk about it from
every perspective, in every way that represents all people. So
when I do this podcast is not about putting all
Black women in the same category, because all Black women
are different. So when I break it down, I'm breaking
down from every single aspect. But one thing I learned

(14:41):
to do is to be specific on who I'm referring
to whether I'm referring to Harlet's succubists and Jezebels, whether
I'm looking at vampires wounds and she's clothing boy and
girl to croydwolves, sirens, vampires and snakes. So I'm very
specific on who I speak on one thing. As a
life coach, you got to give people multiple ways of

(15:03):
thinking and multiple ways of being, so you can't put
everybody in the same category because everybody is different. Nobody
is the same. Everybody has their own way of dealing
with things, their own ways of coping, their own ways
of being successful. Everybody's not the same. The problem is
everybody want to put everybody in the same category, like

(15:25):
we're all the same. They do it when it comes
to business, they do it when it comes to everything.
When that's not the correct way to help people. You
got to give people different perspectives, different ways of thinking.
You got to give them multiple choices so that way
they can make the right decision. So I'm going to
find a video right quick about why black women are single,

(15:48):
just to show you an example of what I'm referring to.
So it's just like saying, why is it that people
can't lose weight. There's a lot of different reasons why
people can't lose weight. There are many, many different reasons.
At one time it was because people were lazy. Now

(16:09):
we know that that's not the case. We now know
that even if you go to the gym, it still
doesn't mean that you're gonna be able to lose weight.
That doesn't even matter at this point. So we're gonna
listen to Charleston Charleston White, right, and I'm gonna let
him explain why black women are single and single mothers

(16:37):
because this is crazy and this is like an eight
minute video. But there's another one I'm thinking about as well.
But at the end of the day, like I said,
there's many, many different different reasons why black women are single,
and this season we're gonna go into it because, like
I said, when I tell y'all my version of why

(17:00):
black women are single, y'all gonna be shocked. And it's
not because of nothing they told you. If anything is,
it's because taught behavior. So, like I said, I mean,
let me get into this far place before I start
playing these videos. And if I don't do it today,
I'm gonna do it next next week. For number one

(17:21):
taught behavior. When you got black women that can be
in their emotions and they can express their emotions, and
they're told not to have sex before marriage, not to
basically expose too much, not to be promiscuous, and you
are taught how to be a wife back in the

(17:41):
early seventies, early eighties, and early nineties. After the early nineties,
and when it came to the late two thousands and
the late oh no sorry, late nineties and late two
thousands or early two thousands, long, these kids are not
taught how to be wives. Girls are not taught to
be wives. It's at least a large percentage. Most of

(18:04):
them don't even have their fathers. There's another reason. Most
women don't even have an example of what being and
what a married man as far as a good godly
man would be, would look like, regardless of what religion
that it is. You have a lot of lot of
young girls because of culture that are forced to that

(18:26):
are forced to marry as soon as their period comes
on to a man twice their age via a tribal
like in India and Africa and multiple other countries like Japan,
the the so pretty much the Africans, the Arab culture
and then the Hispanic culture. They're all about marrying young

(18:51):
girls off young and they'll mainly marry off the unattractive
one first because she's the one that's not gonna get
a man based on looks. So, like I said, there's
multiple different facets and multiple different reasons of why black
women are single. But you gotta go all the way
back to slavery for this conversation. You gotta go back

(19:12):
to when black women were essayed by their slave masters.
You got to go back to when black men sat
there and watch these men do this and were forced
to have to raise their kids knowing that even when
we were in Africa and we were basically sold into slavery,

(19:34):
we were being sexually assaulted and black men had to
sit there and watch. Not only that, a lot of
light skinned women were actually sold into prostitution. Actually it
was black, light skinned black women that were the first
ones to be in the prostitution in the United States
of America. Like PEO don't know that. So again, there's
a lot of different circumstances that make this what this is.

(19:58):
So again I'm not about but I'm just speaking facts
when it comes to history. Then also you have the
demasculation of black men by other races during slavery, and
there are multiple different ways that black men were demasculated
and that's why they act the way they do now
because they've been demasculated. But then again, that was the

(20:19):
intention when they put you in the ghettos in the
first place. So, like I said, if you're gonna talk
about it, talk about it from every aspect, because at
the end of the day, like I said, it's all
about understanding and being able to learn from certain things.
So I'm gonna have to put y'all on mute. I'm
gonna click on it and then press mute. So hopefully, okay,

(20:45):
let me put it on mute and then click on it,
and don't let y'all hear what Charleston White had to say.
So once y'all hear this, then y'all can make your
own decision on what you think about it. So give
me one let me share my screen, and then I'm
gonna let y'all hear what Charleston White had to say

(21:07):
about why black women are single mothers and about our emotions.
So this is gonna be very interesting, So bear with
me one second. So what I'm gonna do is I'm
gonna take myself out, so y'all on these other channels
can hear it. But I really want you to hear

(21:28):
what he has to say, because at the end of
the day, this is what black women are dealing with
and why Black women are the way they are, and
why a lot of black women are single while black
women are alone. So this is just the introduction of
the season. So I'm gonna take myself out and mute myself. Well,

(21:50):
I probably just mute myself and then I'm gonna let
y'all hear it. So mute myself and then we're gonna
get started. Give me one second, you'll get a fun
of Jesus Christ. Which one did I do? Though? Hold
on a second, I can't find which one I do
though I should know. Fail me a minute, Uh, just wonder. Okay,

(22:14):
it is all right, so let's let's listen to it.
Did I grab the right one? Hold on? I have
so much going on. I know it's here, I just
can't find which one it was. Hold on a second,
my bad. It's don't tell me I went out of it.

Speaker 2 (22:38):
And that's what the media, uh, and that's what uh
people who do advertisement. That's what they bank on. They
play on our feelings, and they normally as women.

Speaker 4 (22:54):
But you know, I'll see it from a lot of guys. Now,
well yeah, well I see when I when I'm sending.

Speaker 2 (23:00):
On the internet, right, if I say something, I could
say anything.

Speaker 4 (23:03):
Yesterday I said, Yo, you know, I ain't never flying
flying them on unless I fly first class. And boy,
the dudes the women be like, oh yeah, I feel you,
and all of that other type of stuff.

Speaker 2 (23:16):
The black men are the ones that get upset.

Speaker 4 (23:19):
They want to humble you. They say that you should
be quiet about it. You need to acknowledge their feelings.
They all want to go to therapy.

Speaker 2 (23:29):
It's the men that I see it from. Now.

Speaker 1 (23:32):
I don't see it even in the comments.

Speaker 2 (23:34):
I see the men get mad at you.

Speaker 1 (23:36):
Yeah, ain't the women?

Speaker 2 (23:38):
Yeah yeah, yeah, Well, because men have emotionally evolved into
women by way of emasculation or the overbearing mother, the

(24:00):
over the overly sexual mother. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (24:03):
Uh.

Speaker 2 (24:06):
The black man never really got to express himself. He's
feeling quick crime, so he cryed on inside, whineing mother.
So now when he grew up, he complained on the job. Uh,
complain in the relationships. Never happened in relationship, always finding
something wrong in a relation.

Speaker 1 (24:25):
Uh. Uh women hate that well.

Speaker 2 (24:30):
Because well they hate it. But but just think man
mostly almost didn't give it about how they feel. Shut
up quick crime. Don't you know they never got to
express themselves. Uh so online if they can have right
and spell, then just their method of expressing himself. The

(24:52):
internet gave the voiceless voice.

Speaker 1 (24:58):
Boy did it?

Speaker 2 (24:59):
Ever, it gave the voiceless the voice, and so uh
the emotionally responsive black man. Uh, it's the detriment of
the black community for the last thirty years.

Speaker 1 (25:20):
Break that down.

Speaker 2 (25:21):
The mostly responsive black man have been the detriment of
the black community the last thirty years. He's been the
one doing all the killing. Uh, they're gonna hate you
for that one.

Speaker 3 (25:32):
Uh.

Speaker 2 (25:33):
He's been the most unfocused one because he just want
to have fun and feel good because he's mostly responsive.

Speaker 1 (25:41):
Uh, give me one second through the commercial.

Speaker 2 (25:52):
Most black males in America. Uh, they can't think past
their their emotions because they don't know how to separate
thoughts from emotions. So uncomfortable thoughts lead them into the emotions.

(26:13):
That's why the end result is aggression. That's why everything
that's uncomfortable for the black man, at some point on
it he has to solve it with violence because he
hasn't learned any any any mechanisms or any forms of uh,
expressing himself. Every you're punk in every in every aspect

(26:34):
of a black man growing up. And if he's trying
to express himself, how you feel, what you feel about something,
he gets shut out. Shut there, oh man and his feelings.
Oh yead this feelings. It's normal to be in your feelings.
So when you're online, it's okay for these guys to

(26:58):
be in their feelings. All of these street guys, and
they feeling online about what another man is saying, not
about what he's doing. All of this is about what
a man is saying, not what he's done to you,
not what he's done to your sister, not what he's
done to your mother, All about what he's saying. And

(27:21):
these guys is upset, they're angry, they're developing emotions, their
hate is coming in their heart all from what another
man is saying.

Speaker 1 (27:32):
Uh.

Speaker 2 (27:34):
No one could have predicted this group of black males
and white males with all these feelings. The Internet, homie,
the internet did something to humanity that that they could
have it couldn't. No one could foresee this.

Speaker 1 (27:49):
Let me stop right there for a minute. Let me
stop right there, because that's not incorrect, that's not true.
The social media has a part to play in it,
but not really the reason why men are not emotional.
I do agree, because men are told their emotions or
weaknesses that if a man cries, it means that he's weak. Well,

(28:17):
that might be the reason why you got so many
gay men running around here, because everybody forgets what. A
lot of these men went to jail. They were sexually assaulted.
So you really want to know where the gay community
came for the most part, was men in jail in
the beginning. Now, even in the Bible, yes there was
Solomon Gomore where you had a lot of stuff going

(28:40):
on in today during that time except pornography. But see,
you also got to bring the sex industry into that
as well, because who created the sex industry. Men who
created the porn industry, who created the escorting, the prostitution,
beat walking, the strip clubs. Men who were the ones

(29:04):
on these songs talking about women giving up their bodies?
Men who are the ones saying you ain't nothing but
woo your mama, hump back up back. Oocha, Mama, you
ain't nothing but woocha mama, hump back up back. But
your mama, what about put in your mouth? What about
too short an ic? What about two live crew? So

(29:25):
if you gonna go ahead and y'all create the monsters
that you now got a problem? Who created only fans? Men? Men?
Y'all were the ones that went and got these beautiful
girls and put them in the sex industry, y'all the
ones that said sex sells when it comes to clothing. Okay,

(29:47):
I mean even when I got home right now, it's
something that would be considered sexual, and it would and
I got it all for a reason. But anyway, like
I said at the end of I do see his point.
But no, the problem in the black community is the
family's structure was destroyed before we even got here. So

(30:11):
let's go deep. When it comes to slavery, before it
was slavery, it was indigenous servants. It was the Spanish,
the Dutch, and the Portuguese that came and got black
people aka African descent people, and we were taken into
the islands first and then South America. Because if you

(30:34):
look at all the people in South America. That's what
we look like. See, this's the thing, if you really
we've never thought to look into Portugal and Spain and
the Dutch when it comes to slavery. We don't even
know what it was like for people in France. We

(30:55):
don't even know what it's like in Jamaica and all
of the islands when it came to slavery, because again,
slavery didn't really become a big thing until they until
we came to the United States, we were indigenous servants
that were able to buy back our freedom because Queen
Charlotte is an example of that. You want to know

(31:15):
why that they didn't have a Caucasian person a married
King George, because no Caucasian woman could handle King George.
Who did they give them to a black woman, a
biracial black woman. Let's not forget that even in Africa,
we were battling and stripped from our children and our husbands.

(31:39):
Do y'all not remember the Woman King when all of
y'all complained about that movie. If you would have watched it,
then you would have paid attention on why the Black
community when it comes to relationships, it don't work. Why
is it that back during that time, black men trusted
black women to be warriors? All wait, see, I don't

(32:04):
want to talk about that. Why was it in Wakanda
when it came to black panther he had black women
as soldiers and not black men. Why? Because women are
way more loyal than men. Point blame period. There are

(32:25):
more women that can be faithful to a man than
a man being faithful to a woman. So if you
really want to get into it, let's get into it.
When the Spanish first got to Africa, we were already
at war as it was, and there were millions of
tribes that lost they husbands and their kids. So if

(32:48):
you want to get into it, let's get into it.
Then we've always been separated even then, because we've been
fighting against each other lone before the Portuguese, Spanish and
the Dutch got there. And to tell you the truth,
they didn't even want slaves when they originally got there.

(33:08):
They didn't even know anything about what was there. It
wasn't until the tribe said, we don't want to give
up our minerals, We don't want to give up nothing,
but will give you the people who we captured. As
soon as they saw them guns. They wanted the guns
so that way they could fight against other tribes. So

(33:29):
you were sold for guns. But see a lot of
y'all don't know that. You don't know that. As matter
of fact, I can pull it up for you. I
can pull up a video that proves my point. So
we as Africans and African descent have always been in chaos.
And not only that, most young girls at the age

(33:49):
of five, between the age of five and the age
of sixteen was married off to a boy or a
man twice her age. Y'all really want to get because
I'm telling you not gonna like it. All of y'all
are way off as to why we are going through
what we're going through. We've been destroying each other even

(34:12):
before the colonizers got there. We ain't now being being united.
It has always been the battles of the tribes. And
then y'all got pissed off because of the title woman king.
But if you do your history, there was actually a
real tribe that fought against the colonizers. It wasn't men,

(34:33):
it was women. It was a woman group that was
fighting against the colonizers, not men. But see, if I
was to show black women that black women were rulers
in Africa. I would like to know how many black
men would have problems with that, because a lot of
y'all will be very pissed off because you have no

(34:55):
idea how many how many black women men were rulers
and didn't have a husband. But see if we bring
that out in conversation, black men will be pissed off
because they will contradict the fact that Black women are
supposed to lower themselves. Black women were never supposed to

(35:16):
lower themselves. We've always been queens, We've always been rulers,
and we are the rulers of our households. Why because
we do the majority of everything in the household. The
only thing you do is pay bills. You do two things, provide,
protect and give us children. That's all you do. We cook,

(35:36):
we clean, we raise your children, which means what women
are nurturers. We are teachers. So how in the world
can men rule a nation when number one, you don't
teach and you're not nurturing. So, if you want to
know what, all the great nations have fallen apart due
to males because of those two things nurturing and teaching.

(36:02):
Who does that go to women. But in the Bible,
was it Paul and David and Jesus not only nurturers
but teachers? Okay, I wait, I wait for that conversation.
I wait for that. So how in the world can

(36:23):
a man lead when you don't even know how to
teach or even nurture? Because don't you have to nurture
a nation in order for her to be a great nation?
I would think. So that's why God gave women the
ability to make children. Do I have to go with

(36:47):
Leah and Rebecca? Let's talk about that story. Leah was
the unattractive sister and Rebecca was the beautiful sister, right,
and Jacob wanted Rebeca and her father told him he
had to work for seven years to marry her. But
instead of him marrying her, he ended up marrying Leah,

(37:12):
the one he didn't want, and when he found out,
he got pissed off, but since he consummated the marriage,
he couldn't tell him back, and then he ended up
eventually marrying Leah seven years later. But guess who ended
up having his children? Guess who is the descendant of Leah.
Not only was Solomon the descendant of Leah, also David

(37:37):
was the descendant of Leah, and Jesus was a descendant
of Leader of Leah. So all the greatest twelve tribes
were the descendants of Leah. So please tell me, and
what what what way are you a leader when we're
the ones that give birth to your children, when we're

(37:59):
the ones that raise your children. So please enlighten me
how you can be a leader when you can't teach? So, yeah,
you can get us pregnant, but you're not there to teach.
I mean, it's no different than a basketball court. A
basketball coach does what they teach correct. So how many

(38:24):
males in the NBA and the NFL are teachers? Come
on now? Ain't we ain't gonna go here today? Because
I am so sick and tired of men saying that
we provided protect that's all you do. How can you
protect me if you're not with me twenty four hours

(38:45):
a day? How can you protect me if I'm in
the house with your kids and the house gets set
on fire and you ain't at home. How can you
protect me if I'm not with you and I'm coming
home from work and somebody ends up kidnapping me, in
sexually assaulting me, how can you protect me if I'm
in a mall and there's a mass shooting and I
get shot. You don't provide and protect every single solitary day.

(39:13):
I'm so sick of y'all. I am. I'm sick of y'all.
So at the end of the day, what he said
is somewhat correct top behavior, top behavior. Men and women
are not raised the same way. Men are taught to

(39:34):
not be in your feelings. But see, here's the thing,
he's a kicker to it all. There are girls that
are raised like boys because their father wanted a son
and got daughters. That's why you have girls in the
WNBA that play sports because the father didn't have a daughter.

(39:54):
So when you have girls that are raised like males
when it comes to playing sports and when it comes
to being a mechanic and being in the military, majority
of those girls are have fathers that didn't have any boys.

(40:17):
So let's say a man doesn't have any boys and
he has all girls. Don't you think one of those
girls is gonna end up more masculine. And not only that,
males and females both have masculine and feminine energy. So
if men don't know how to tap into their feminine

(40:41):
energy because they're not told to, and women don't tap
into their masculine energy. Wouldn't that be a kind of imbalance,
which is probably why you have so many people that
are gay because of imbalance. As a human being, you

(41:02):
have masculine and feminine traits. There are some women that
have beards, there are some men that have breast So
I mean, do you wanna make this more complicated than
what it is. You have men that got butts that
look like women, and you got women that don't have
any butts like males. So I mean, come on, now,

(41:25):
can we be real? Is this a conversation you don't
really wanna have cause here the thing as a light coach,
it's something that I have to sit up here and
bring up all the time. That's why for my son,
my son does happen to his emotions. But at the
same time, this is what I tell him, when you

(41:45):
do something wrong, you have no right to cry whatsoever.
You're gonna take everything to come with it. You gonna
take that karmel. But if I hurt your feelings, you
got every right to say, Mommy, I hurt your feelings.
So when he gets in trouble. He already know. You
go suck it up because you are not gonna sit
up here and cry after you got in trouble, and
because you don't want to deal with a consequence of

(42:06):
because the karmel of your actions. You think you're gonna
sit up here and cry. Let this gonna work on me.

Speaker 3 (42:11):
No.

Speaker 1 (42:12):
But at the same time, if my baby is hurt,
he has every right to cry. He has every right
to be in his feelings. But guess what. That's called
emotional intelligence. And that is something that's not taught in school.
That is not something that's taught at all. That's why
we're all confused because of emotional intelligence. So if you

(42:32):
have girls that are able to tap into their emotions,
that is why women are emotional. That's why when it
comes to a man and a woman is sitting up
here crying, he is looking at her life. She's crazy
because this man is like, what are you crying for?
Why are you sitting up here crying? A man will
never understand your emotions if he's raised not to have them.

(42:56):
That's why, as a wife you have to teach a male.
That's why when you start dating men, that's the first
thing you got to teach them how to be emotional,
and then when they are emotional, you're telling them they're
a punk for being emotional. You can't do what their
parents do. That man should be able to cry to you.
That man should be able to be emotional. That's why

(43:19):
when they have sex with you, they don't know how
to make love to you. How can a man make
love to you when he has no emotions. And then
the ones that do have emotions, y'all call them sensitive,
The ones that open the doors for you, The ones
that do make love to you, the ones that actually

(43:39):
hold your hand and give you a hug and say, baby,
it's gonna be okay. No, you want the bad boys
to sit up there and just bam bam bam bam
bam and then leave you where you at. Make up
your mind as far as what y'all won't at this
point at the end of the day, if you have

(44:02):
males and females that are taught two different ways, what
do you think you gonna get a disconnect? It's called disconnect.
All these females that want to be taken care of,
You think there's not men that don't want to be
taken care of no different than females. You think there's
not women out here paying child support. You think there's

(44:24):
not women out here that's not paying child support, women
that have been taking care of wrong men, sitting at
home doing the same thing a female does, spending all
her money. I'm aliving testament of that. So males and
females are one of the same when it comes to mentally,
when it comes to taught behavior, when it comes to

(44:45):
being spoiled, when it comes to being entitled, male and female,
there is no difference between the two of you mentally
except the way you were taught. Because there are men
out here that cook better than women, But are we
gonna have their conversation? You have a lot of men
that are chefs in twenty twenty five, and yet instill

(45:07):
cooking used to be a woman's job. So there's no
longer masculine and female roles anymore. Because there's women in
the military, there's women mechanics, there's women in sports. To
the end of the day, there's no difference between men
and women mentally. Get off your high horse. None. There

(45:31):
are women that are better at paying bills and more
responsible than men. And on the flip side, there are
men that are more responsible than there are women. There
are men that are claustaphobic. I forgot what they call it,
not claustophobic OCD. Who clean better than women, who cook

(45:52):
better than women, who take care of the baby better
than women. So y'all need to get over these masculine
feminine roles. Because if you were by yourself and you
had to pay bills by yourself, wouldn't you be doing
it by yourself? If the mother of the child passed away,
wouldn't you be raising them kids by yourself? If you

(46:13):
didn't bring another woman into the situation, you absolutely would
being marriedly having a roommate, that's like saying, me and
my homegirl, we are roommates. We pay bills, we cook,
we washed dishes, We do everything together, evenly yoked. If

(46:34):
you don't think that everything is fifty to fifty, you
lost your mind if you believe it. If you don't
believe it, and if you lower yourself for somebody that
is not on the level as you, and as God said,
you meet people where they at. You meet them exactly
where they at. You don't look at them the way
you want them to be. You look at them exactly

(46:56):
for what they are, because then you wouldn't waste your
time on people that ain't worth it you because that
person is not on the same level. Why are you
trying to make them into something they will never be,
Just like your parents do it. They'll have one child
that's very pretty, that's in the modeling industry that they
put them in, and then because the other child is smarter,

(47:20):
they don't want to deal with that child. Or the
other child is smarter, but the other one's more athletic.
But you want them both to be the same. You
put more precedence on one than you do the other.
When they're two different kids. One is more like you,
one is more like dad. But it ain't just your parents,
is also your grandparents great grandparents. That's like when I

(47:45):
look at my niece, I see me and my mama.
She looks like her mom a little bit, but not really.
She looks Everybody think she's my child and she's not.
So what I'm saying to y'all is this here, This
whole misconception of the gender roles is the problem when

(48:08):
it comes to relationships. Males and females need to be
raised the exact same way men shouldn't be out here
having sex with multiple women. Men should be versions when
they get married, no differently than women should be versions.
Why in the world as a version, when I want
to sleep with a man that has already given his

(48:28):
body to multiple women, Well, I don't want to do that,
cause see, that's what the problem is. You have people
out here that are inexperienced, and I don't think somebody
would experience should be messing with somebody's inexperience. Why because
both of y'all need to learn together. And that's where
infidelity becomes a problem, because you want if you have

(48:50):
one person as a freak and they want to do
all this slapping it up, flipping it, rubbing it down,
we'll get it into later. And on the flip side
of that, you got a girl or a god has
never had that experience. You have some women that's been
in missionary their whole entire life and don't know anything else.
You got women that have never ever went down a

(49:12):
man a day in their life. Excuse my language. I
don't want to be so vulgar here, but I'm just
being honest and I'm just being real here. So I
need y'all to stop with his nonsense. You deal with
people where they are. If you have more experience and
you go to somebody and you're asking them to teach you,
that is one thing because that is certainly what I
did when I didn't have as much experience. Yes, a

(49:36):
man taught me because I asked him to after I
got sex getstaughted twice. So at the end of the day,
sex is something you have a whole lifetime to learn.
You have hurt, You got a whole lifetime to learn everything.
Because even when you graduate college, let me tell you
something about college, in high school and all of this,

(49:58):
and that it ain't gonna teach you when you get
on a job. On the job, training's gonna teach you that.
So at the end of the day, don't you have supervisors,
don't you have trainers for that? So you think in
real life when it comes to relationships, you don't have trainers.

(50:18):
And that's my point in this whole conversation. If we're
gonna talk about it, then let's talk about the real
issues here. And the issues are men and women are
raised differently, and that's why the relationships don't work. Because
you want something that is unrealistic. You want somebody that

(50:40):
don't want you, But yet you're gonna continue to chase
after him, continuously trying to hold on to somebody don't
want to be kept, trying to make somebody into something
that's gonna be ending up benefiting someone else. It's just
like when I hear black men say why they they outside?
They race and now and THEA and now in the
Philippines they're coming back with HIV. Oh okay. So, like

(51:07):
I said, at the end of the day, when it
comes to talk behavior, that is the reason in one
of the problems number two, evenly yoked, you got one
person that is thriving and the other person is not
being stagnant. They're sitting still. You got women twenty five
years later saying they wish they never got married young.
They wish they would have waited. You got women now

(51:29):
that one divorced their husbands because they realize they never
have been able to do something. But they can't leave
their husbands because they've never worked a day in a life. See,
that's the kicker to it all. When you lower yourself
and you get pregnant, or you have friends or family

(51:53):
or whatever. And I call this the leaching syndrome. The
leeching syndrome is you have people that leach off you,
and that's why people don't understand attraction either. When you
show off too much, tell too much, put everything out there,

(52:14):
that's when you get leeches. So let's say, for example,
an unattractive woman walks out the door, but she got
a banging body, right. But then you got a girl
that's got a really pretty face and yet fake boobies.
But yet you got a girl that actually has real
boobies and a banging body, but she's unattractive. Which one

(52:37):
A They're gonna be drawn to the attracted girl to
a pretty face. It doesn't matter whether her hair is
will or not. She's just pretty. She had a pretty
face and boobies that ain't hers. Where you have another
girl that may not be the best attracted, may not
be the most attractive, but her body is banging, banging body,

(52:57):
but he's still ain't gonna want He'll sleep with it,
but he's never gonna date it, never gonna take her out.
So it's a little bit more complicated than what people
on these panels have been saying. It's way way way
more complicated than that. So what I want people to
understand in these circumstances, and why I created this podcast
is because I want black women to heal and stop

(53:18):
trying to be like Caucasian women because you're never gonna
be a Caucasian woman. You're never gonna be able to
be promiscuous to the point of Caucasian women and Caucasian men,
regardless of how promiscuous a woman is, he's still gonna
marry her. A Caucasian man is gonna marry a Caucasian
woman regardless of what her weight is, and regardless of

(53:38):
what she looks like, and regardless of whether or not
she has multiple men or not. In a high body count,
black men are the only ones holding body counts. I
don't know why. It's stupid. I mean, girls going wild
and the strip clubs were originally Caucasian women. But now
that you have social media as big as it is,

(54:02):
you're not seeing as many Caucasian women as far as
groupies and all that stuff. Now as black women. You
got Black women now doing what Caucasian people were doing
in the early sixties, in the early fifties when it
came to peace and love. That's why I said, you know,
I was born in the seventies. I was born during
the Peace and Love era when you had Jenny, I mean,

(54:25):
Jimmy Hendrix and the Beatles and all of them, when
John Lenny was dating up. What's that woman name? Oh? Oh, Jesus,
I can't ever say her name. It's gonna come to
me in a minute. But y'all know who I'm talking about, honey.
They've been bringing Vietnam Videnese people over here, and even
when my dad was in the Vietnam War, he even

(54:46):
told me a lot of those men were sleeping with
them women over there, and they were and brought some
of my mom. Matter of fact, Vietnam Vitenese people were
the first people that came to the United States as
foreigners during that time, besides Germany and even a lot
of Jews came over here. So at the end of
the day, like I said, know your history, ladies, jim

(55:08):
because history will teach you a lot. History will answer
a lot of your questions. See, knowledge, intellect, and education
is so important because the more you know, the better
decisions you make. So that's why when somebody says something,
you can't take people at face ye, you got to
do your own research. And your own the diligence, and

(55:29):
with knowledge, intellect and education, it can be intertwined and
it can be expanded. So there is no right or
wrong when it comes to education. It's just right or
wrong when it comes to actions and behavior and decisions
and choices. So, like I said, is this easy? No,

(55:50):
it's not so at the end. It's just like people
that are alone and people that are by themselves, they
don't even want to date because they're scared. There are
people that found their pieces and they quiety, tranquility and
do not want to go back to chaos. They don't.
Why would I want to go back to chaos. I
don't want to do that. I don't want to go

(56:11):
back to nonsense. But I'm going to continue listening to
this video because I have not heard this. So I
put myself on mute and listen to the rest of
this and see what else they have to say. I'm
back in a second, sreal.

Speaker 2 (56:33):
No one could could have could foresee this. I don't
give a fuck what nobody say about the Bible in
the Kuran. Man, God didn't factor in the Internet.

Speaker 1 (56:44):
They did.

Speaker 2 (56:46):
Many they couldn't have factored into this. So uh, that's
why I came with the free Keisha. My ingod.

Speaker 4 (56:59):
The first time I ever heard you say that I
came with the free Kesh was so funny.

Speaker 2 (57:04):
Let her and I really want to develop a real
platform because I see them bom. I see no problem
with me calling a Free Keisha Friday a whole segment
where you call in and really calling in free Kesha.

Speaker 1 (57:22):
Let out you, uh, let on out. I heard that.

Speaker 2 (57:27):
So, so the concept for free Kesha is is to
give a safe platform to mails or where they can
come on her and act like whole because I say
what they want to say and get that whole up
out of it and release them, release them.

Speaker 1 (57:41):
No, I'm gonna tell you. The first time that I've
heard you say that.

Speaker 4 (57:45):
I was online and I was doing a live but
a dude uh and it's funny what his name was.

Speaker 1 (57:51):
His real name is uh.

Speaker 4 (57:54):
And I was doing the online live and he was
giving his thoughts and he started he was talking about
something that you said, but you were specifically I think
he was talking about Kanye.

Speaker 2 (58:04):
Because that was when that whole thing.

Speaker 4 (58:06):
Was flying off of Kanye or whatever like that.

Speaker 1 (58:08):
Uh.

Speaker 4 (58:08):
And you hit me up and you said, put me
online or whatever I said, all right, bet, and so
I put you online, and uh, he started getting in
his feelings and getting in his emotions about you when
you said, yo, free kicher let out.

Speaker 1 (58:20):
God, that junk was so funny.

Speaker 2 (58:22):
I heard that whole knocking. Yeah, I heard that whole knocking.
Let her out. Let release it. You'll feel better. Yeah,
we ain't gonna shame you. We need an open and
safe platform for black men can come and they can
get all this kind of stuff out of all and
don't nobody ridicule stop.

Speaker 1 (58:47):
Let me stop right there for a minute, because even
if you do that, Charleston White, even if you let
men come on there so they can just let go
of that whole let go of the female energy, it's
still gonna be there. It ain't going nowhere. Is this
gonna be a one time thing. It would have to
be a forever thing that whenever men get into their feelings,

(59:07):
then go on your platform and just say it all
the time. It can't just be a one time thing,
because that just doesn't work like that. If that's the case,
we'll keep repeating the same mistakes over and over and
over again. Twenty four eight. So I'm sorry, sir, Unless
you're gonna do that where you do that every single
solitary day. That is the only way you're gonna be
able to do that, because at the end of the day,

(59:29):
as a life coach and as a mental health practitioner,
at this point, do you know how many of my clients,
even if I was to release them into the world
after we went through this journey of this chaos and
destruction and the Kuddus should have woods and why they
didn't do the Cuds should have woods? And if they
look at it from what happened back then and then

(59:50):
look at things now, would you've done differently than you
did back then? And once you're gonna do in the future,
are you really gonna do that? No, The only way
you're gonna do that is if somebody's supervises. You see,
if you leave these people alone, they're gonna come right
back to you and say to you, Oh, I made
a mistake, what did you do? Well? I got back

(01:00:11):
into my codependency. If that was the case, when people
went to rehab, they would get off drugs. You would
have dem Demi Levado still struggling with drugs. If that
was the case, she would be able to be on
her own and not have to contact a sponsor or
going back to rehab. Somebody gotta go to rehab. I

(01:00:33):
won't go go go I mean Amy Winehouse said it.
You know what I mean. Time them that's been the
rehab and he ended up passing away because of ftnel. So,
like I said, there are people that got to have
people around them to keep them from doing the stupid,

(01:00:55):
dumb things did they do, because if you leave them
alone to their devices, they gonna mess around and do
the same. God for sakeond nonsense. That's the problem in
the situation. So at the end of the day, you
you can't leave your therapists. You gonna need your therapist
the rest of your life. You can't leave your mama.
You gonna leave your mama to the day she passed away,

(01:01:17):
and did what you gonna do when she pass away.
That's like saying, I thank god both my parents are
still alive, and kick it, cause I don't know what
I would do it thought. So at the end of
the day, say what you want to. If you don't
have somebody with some type of wisdom to talk to
you out of your chaos, you gonna end up doing
the wrong thing. And for some of y'all, y'all wanna

(01:01:41):
do something negative and didn't want to sit up there
and say, well, I didn't think about the consequence. Yes
you did, you just didn't think about it till after
you did what you did if you thought you gonna
get away with it. Okay. Good example of this. Two
African American women went out with two Caucasian men and
ended up decapitated after they session It's slid and they

(01:02:05):
decapitated them because the girls went to their crib instead
of going home. So instead of going home after the date,
they went over their house and got decapitated and unlived.
And now what this man only gets life. He don't
get the electric chair, he gets light, he still gets saved.
Their lives are gone, So what real consequences was there?

(01:02:29):
He gonna be sitting in jail. He's still gonna get
to eat, He's still gonna get be able to Breathe
only difference is his freedom physically, he ain't gonna be
had no freedom. But that don't mean he still can't
get online and still talk to women online like love
and lock up. I'm sorry, come just being real here. So,

(01:02:53):
like I said, is there really any true consequences? No,
because when people think about the consequences after the fact,
when that should be the first thing that comes to
your brain, one of the consequences and repercussions. And in
this society, they're not gonna tell you the truth or
old truth or nothing but the truth. So help you
gotta less you on court, and even then some of

(01:03:14):
them gonna lie. That's why I lie is the truth
and the truth is a lie. It's easy to believe
a lie than this. They believe the truth is unfortunate thing. So,
like I said, that's why I started this podcast. People.
I said to myself, you know what, I'm so sick
and tied of these men and women going back and
forth when really both parties are responsible. It's both parties

(01:03:38):
faults because at the end of the day, the family
dynamic in the black community is lone gone. My generation
is the last generation where parents actually stayed together for
twenty something years and then after the kids were out
the house, they got forced but they still were together

(01:04:00):
for the kids. They still were there for the kids.
There are many women that lived in the house that
couldn't stand each other, but they stayed for the kids.
There are many women that did not stay together, but
they still basically respected the other when they come to
their kids. They never allowed anybody to disrespect their baby
daddy and their baby mama. Matter of fact, you weren't

(01:04:20):
even called baby mama and baby daddy. You would call
ex girlfriend, ex boyfriend, point blame. Period. Things ain't the
way they used to be no more. And there's no
really good example of marriage anymore in your family. And
the time about celebrity was I'm telling my family was.

(01:04:42):
So that's the main number number one reason. If all
you see is chaos, what you think you're gonna do chaos.
That's why I said when it came to Chris Brown
and Rialne, you wanna know what it happened because all
he saw was his mama being beat by ex boyfriend.
So you mimic what you say. And if you see
your mama keep getting beat and she keep taking them back,

(01:05:04):
what makes you think he ain't gonna do the same thing.
You want to know why Christopher Marurice Brown is not
gonna get married to his mama passed away because his
mother is the only woman that he's actually in love with.
Y'all gonna y'all gonna stop playing with me today because
I'm telling y'all a lot of these men the reason
they are the way they are because the woman that
treated him like a husband like a boyfriend is stealing

(01:05:28):
a picture his mama. The only woman half these men
gonna do right by is their mama unless they don't
have a relationship with they mama, and they can't stand
their mama other than that. For the most part, that
man is not getting married until that man's mama passed away,
until Miss Tamika Hawkins passed away. Chris Brown ain't getting married.

(01:05:49):
He is not getting married. Not only that. The reason
why in twenty twenty five loud these men ain't getting married,
Why because they can't get fair, they can't be faithful,
and they know full well to get caught. They gonna
bet y'all support Alimoni is by sport, and that's why
these men are not getting married. So yeah, they're gonna
They may say will you marry me, and then wait
seven years before he decides to actually marry you. When

(01:06:11):
he's on his death bed or when he's getting ready
to have to be in a nursing home where he
got to be changed do you know how many women
that work in nurse nursing homes say how a lot
of men are alone and nobody comes to see them,
not even their own kids. So, like I said, we
gotta start from the beginning, starting from the bottom. Now
with him, we gotta start from the bottom. So we're

(01:06:31):
gonna start in Africa because that's where we gotta start.
When it comes to wire our relationships don't work. We
gotta start our way back before which we came and
the didn't work our way up. So this is what
we're gonna do. There's some videos that I'm gonna play
during these episodes where I'm gonna let y'all hear the
backstory of black women not only in Africa, but also

(01:06:52):
in America in all these other countries. So we're gonna
learn about indigiting servants and how they were treated. Were
also gonna go back to Queen's Charlott because there's a
whole purpose and point in that. See, black women, no
matter what, we are just some of the most strongest women.
Because I want I try to tell you when I
watched Queen, I didn't even watch Queen Charlotte, but I
kind of knew what was going on because I remember

(01:07:13):
the story, But they could have chose a Caucasian woman
from King George. That means Queen Elizabeth has half black.
But see, we ain't gonna have that conversation. Yeah, Queen
Elizabeth has half black. Why because Queen? Because King George
married Charlotte, and Charlotte was a biracial woman. She had
fifteen kids. Now, y'all remember the part when he told

(01:07:33):
her you can leave and you can go ahead on
and just move on, and she was like, no, I'm
gonna stay here with you. And even though he was
out of his mind with schizophrenia, and she stayed by
that man's side. Welcome to being a black woman because,
like I said, there's no other race of women that's
gonna stand by man this guy schizophrenia. That's why they
chose her. Why because they knew that she could handle him.

(01:07:57):
And sure enough, she was the only one that could
handle him him until she passed away and had fifteen kids.
That right, there'll tell you something. So at the end
of the day, stopped sleeping on black women's strength, because
at the end of the day, they could have chose
any Caucasian woman to marry that man. There was no
Caucasian woman that's gonna be able to deal with with

(01:08:19):
King George. They weren't gonna be able to deal with
that man because I didn't even know at the time
he had schizophrennie, but yeah, he had a schizophrenia and bipolar.
And then when they electrocuted, and what does she do.
She came in there and said, put my husband down.
When he would have episodes, what did she do? She's
the only person that can calm him down. And even
though he didn't remember as he got older, she still

(01:08:43):
made sure to the day she passed away, that man
was happy. Even though he didn't remember for his episodes,
she still made sure that he was good. She accepted
him for exactly for who he was, and he died
a year later ironically, So at the end of the day,
like I said, y'all be sleeping on black women, but

(01:09:04):
I'm also gonna show y'all some black women that basically
were queens and royalty. There was one black queen that
had a thousand husbands and she made them fight to
the death to have one night with her. And that's
where the gladiators came from. A lot of the don't
even know the history of gladiators. Everybody think came from
Rome knowing didn't came from Africa, because there's one queen.

(01:09:28):
She actually had a thousand husbands and she, like I said,
they would fight to the death in the auditorium. And
that's where the gladiator thing came from as it is
today because even during the time of Samson was also

(01:09:49):
during the time of Africa. So yeah, because again everything
started in Africa. And if people really knew why black
people are going through what they're going through. If I
was to tell y'all why, y'all be shocked. But I'm
gonna go ahead and say it. Where did everything begin?

(01:10:10):
Then everything begin between. Yeah, everything began in Africa and
branched out into Jerusalem, Iran, in Iraq. That's why Jesus
was a combination of a rab and black. But that's
not all in the conversation. So you need to understand something.
There are certain things that look I look at like Marvel,
and it was it was Stan Lucas that made me

(01:10:33):
realize all of this stuff plus history itself. So yeah,
when I kept watching the Avengers, it all made sense.
And when I saw a black panther and I bought
my Baby, his first Black Panther comic. It all made sense. So,
like I said, there's a reason why black people are
going through what they're going through. The sad part about

(01:10:54):
it is, y'all don't even know why. It's It's in
the Bible exactly why there's a reason why people are
so intimidated by black people. The probably me is black
people don't even know their own destiny. Black people don't
even know what their pole purpose is. That's sad part
about it. Because Africa is the only continent in countries

(01:11:20):
where they're controlled by other people. No other country is
going through what Africa is going through. Why is that?
Why is it that the French are so determined to
g and and they and they slowly throwing them all out,
They slowly throwing all of these Europeans out, and Costa
Rican Dominican Republicans about to do the same thing. So

(01:11:40):
why is it that saying, Okay, if you if you
go back to Black Panther, Okay, i'm'a try to explain
it this way. Go back to Black Panther and wonder
why they wanted that titanium. And if you look at
Black Panther, then you gonna ex you gonna understand why
I'm saying what I'm saying. Why is it black folks
are the only ones that are not multi billionaires? I

(01:12:05):
need you to answer yourself that question. Why is it
that everything that we have ever ever created has been
making making other races of people billions of dollars? Why
why you think they put you in the ghetto for
last an? All these questions and the Black Panthers right
there in front of your face. If you read Black Panther,

(01:12:26):
glad and read it, all your answers a right there.
Stan Lee pretty much put it out there. Stan Lee
pretty much told you in Black Panther, why were going
through what we're going through? He even said he made
it based upon the Black Panthers. But you if you
go back and read it, and you look at the store,
and go look at the movie Black Panther, it's a

(01:12:48):
whole lot, y'all. Y'all miss When I sat down and
I watched that movie, I sat back and it just
dawned on me. Why now I know why black people
going through what they're going through. I know exactly why,
because what happens when you put an animal in a
cage and then you let it out and set it free.
What you think is gonna happen, It's gonna become a

(01:13:08):
white It's gonna become Okay, let me try this way.
Let me start with Managascar to make this make sense.
If you go and watch Man of Gascar, it will
tell you everything that black people need to know because
I'm explaining why the first Man of gas Scar they

(01:13:29):
were taken from Africa, right, same scenario and where were
they taken to a zoo? Right? And that what black
people went through. Then the zebra was the one that said,
I want to go back to Africa. I know there's
something more out there where the other little animals was like, nah,

(01:13:54):
I don't want to leave them popular I'm doing well.
It wasn't when until they said they were gonna put
the in sleep and he said no, let's go, and
what happened. They left the zoo and ended up out
in the real world. Then the second movie, they ended
up going to Africa back from which they came, went

(01:14:15):
over there and first everything was good, but then they
said they couldn't handle it because they didn't understand the
wildlife because they hadn't been in the wildlife for years.
So they decided to go back. What was the third
one about them being in a circuits? What does that
all represent? They found the world that was animal from

(01:14:38):
where they came and the world they lived in. That's
why they became the circuits, and nobody picked up on that.
For me, I was the only want that picked up
on that. I said, they're talking about black people. I
was like, we can't go back to Africa and we

(01:15:01):
and we stuck here, so why not just start something
that gives us the combination of both worlds? But black
people ain't gonna do that because again, isn't like when
you ask yourself, why are there not black multi billionaires
like Bill Gates and and all these other people? Why
is that why? Because they're not gonna allow you to
be They gonna take everything and strip everything from you.

(01:15:23):
Y'all don't understand me. Please go telling y'all stan Lee
braced us all down, and y'all don't even realize it.
I'm telling you, you really gotta pay attention. When I
think about Galactus, I think about carcage people.

Speaker 4 (01:15:36):
I do.

Speaker 1 (01:15:36):
I think about them because every time I think about
the way they took this country and the way they
have battled throughout the years in Rome and Greece and France,
I think about galactus taking over other people's lands. It was,
I'm telling y'all history. A lot of y'all do not

(01:15:58):
pay attention to stuff, and a right smack dab in
front of yours. But then again, you gotta be a
godly person and somebody has a really big imagination to
figure it out. That's why when you watch something, everything
has a hidden meaning, And every book you read there's
a hidden meaning in all of it, every single solitary

(01:16:20):
thing you look at. So that's why I said, everything
you consume and what you choose to acknowledge, read it
for what it is, not your interpretation of it. Read
it for what it is. Because when you read it
for what it is, that's where the truth gonna be
staring you in your face. When I stop looking at
things for what I wanted them to be and started

(01:16:40):
seeing people and things for what they are, and God
started telling me, no, look, don't look at things for
what you want them to be. Look at the person
for exactly who they are. When I tell you my
life has been happier, when I tell you my life
has been peaceful, why because I ain't taking it on
nobody's problems. God was like, you can be selfish when

(01:17:03):
it come to protecting yourself, but not be selfish when
dragging somebody else in your problems. There's a difference when
it come to being selfish, because when you are selfish,
that means you are putting yourself first. But that also
means you're protecting yourself from harm. You're protecting yourself from
people hurting you. So again, by you seeing what you

(01:17:26):
want to see, you're seeing an illusion that isn't there
and it's not real. But if you see it for
exactly what it is, you ain't got to worry about
the sirens, the vampires, the snakes, the boy and girl
that cry wolf and the wolf and she's clothing, you
ain't gotta worry about it. Why you ain't gotta worry
about the Jezebels, because you'll see them for what they are.

(01:17:47):
It's just like if you look at the Devil's Advocate
when it came to Shady Sorry Stern's character, she saw
things for what they are. She was able to see
them demons. When I'm telling you, Darren, people that can
sit right there and see d and restmeack on you
and will stay away from you, and you'll wonder why
because they see the demon on you. They see it
right smack dam on you. And that's why for me,

(01:18:12):
I can see certain things and everybody can't understand when
I act funny. There's a reason why it's demon on you.
I don't want to know where near me, because again,
a demon can't just come into your world unless you
let it in. Either it forces it way in, or
it manipulates and bamboozles and lies and leads you astray
into it. So at the end of the day, like

(01:18:32):
I said, I'm not saying all of this to be mean.
I'm saying all this to be real because of a
life coach. These are things that I have to sit
here and have to tell people are very very ugly truth.
And that is either you want to stop completely doing
the dumb stuff you're doing, or continue dealing with the
same type of people and you still stack you got.

(01:18:55):
I don't care what you go through. You gotta keep moving.
I don't care what they take from you. Let them
take it. You don't want it back. You don't want
something back from somebody that tainted what you gave them.
Just look at it as you gave it to them,
and keep it moving. If you end a relationship before
you confront somebody, deal with the emotions of it before

(01:19:17):
you confront that person. And when you do, you don't
even want an explanation why, because you already know why
they did it. They did it because they're negative, They
did it because they wanted to. There's no other reason.
I don't care about your explanation. I don't care. Do
whatever you see fit you want to do, whatever it
is that makes you happy, whatever it is that brings
you joy. July, when I went after a sex coat,

(01:19:40):
an African American sex coat, to be exact, I went
through help, but I still forgive them. I ain't mad
at it, and I don't care at this point because
at the end of the day, the blessings that came
after that situation meant everything. And then there's a woman
that passed away in July that was like a mom

(01:20:01):
to maid, and she passed away from loopis and I
helped her get her daughter back and she ended up
losing her life to the loopis and make and my
condolences to her family. But yeah, at the end of
the day, like I said, you don't know what tomorrow's

(01:20:22):
gonna bring. But if you focus on yourself and you
see things for what they are and you don't bring
people into your world, especially if you at peace. Here's
the thing about recovery, y'all. When you recover, the last
thing you want to do is go through the things
you used to go through. The last thing you want

(01:20:44):
to do is continue going through drama that you really
don't want to go through. Being real with it, you
done worked hard to work on yourself just to go backwards.
That's the whole point of growth, that's the whole point
of evolution, evolving and elevating is to be the best

(01:21:04):
version of yourself. And you can't do that if you
keep going backwards and dating the same type of people
and trying to see things and see people from your
perspective of it, but not what it actually is. A
turtle is a turtle. It's just like when they told
us that we couldn't teach kids anymore, and everything is

(01:21:25):
learned through play and daycare. So whatever their interpretation of
what something was was what it was. And that's why
people have the wrong interpretation now because you're seeing what
your version of it is. But it's not wrong because
it's your interpretation. No, it's exactly what it is. It's wrong.
You commit a crime, it's wrong. You have sex before

(01:21:46):
marriage is wrong. If you do this, it's wrong. It's
still wrong. There's no other way around it. It is
still wrong at the end. There's no in between. When
it comes to actions, behavior, choice and decisions. There are consequences,
repercussions in karma to your actions, baby, your choice and
decisions that you gotta live with. And it don't matter

(01:22:08):
why you did it. It don't matter you did it
because you were helping somebody. The point is you didn't
have nothing to do with Stay out of it. Some
things you just need to stay out of. For a
good example of this, a woman on Christmas Day, I
think it had been like ten years now, saw a
homeless woman and her child, got out the car, gave

(01:22:31):
the woman ten dollars. A man came up to her second,
I give you a hug, and stabbed her to death.
Was that her fault? No, all she did was get
out of the car and give the girl ten dollars
and was getting ready to leave and get stabbed. So
sometimes you gotta leave things alone because at the end
of the day. You don't know what's blurting. That's why

(01:22:52):
they tell you don't go to the ATM at night.
And make sure when you go to the ATM, you're
paying attention. You looking behind you, So don't don't don't
be sitting up here not paying attention. When you walk
out the door, you been looking around and make sure
nobody following you. Cause nowadays you got people kidnapping people
and putting people in human trafficking. You gotta worry about

(01:23:14):
your kids being sexual assaulted on the bus, getting beat
up at school. You ain't there. You ain't there to
see what's going on with your child all day every day.
So when your child come home, if something ain't right,
don't sit there and send them back to their school.
You sending them somewhere else. You don't send them back
to the chaos. You don't send them back to something

(01:23:36):
that's causing them pain. What why Why would you do that?
And I say that all the time and somebody that
got bullied in school? My mom had to pull me
out of school every two years. I got bullied mam
entire life. Since I started school. My mama constantly had
to pull me out of school because she pulled me out.

(01:23:57):
She pulled me out, put me in a different school.
I ain't never been to school longer than two years
because I was bullied. So, like I said, I thank
god my mama did that, and I think her, I
love you, mommy, but she did she pulled me out
of school because she was lying. I'm tired of my daughter,
even me and and me and Boma beat up. My
mother moved a lot, but she was worried about my

(01:24:19):
mental health. And a lot of y'all will not do
it because of inconvenience to you. No, if your child
is being bullied, pulled that child out of school, If
that means that you gotta start a business, if that
means that you gotta work from home, you do what
you need to do. Take care of your child, don't
send them back to that. That's why the suicide rate

(01:24:41):
is so high now, because you send them back to
the same kids that are doing something to them, especially
if the principal ain't gonna do nothing about it. And
that's where we're at right now. Sometimes we gotta make
difficult choices if it's gonna benefit our kids. So if
that means take if that means you quitting your job,
going to move back in with your parents. For you

(01:25:03):
to basically do what's best for your child and move
them to a different environment, then that's what you need
to do. If that means that you know full well
that your child is going through this, then you need
to say, Okay, by the end of the year, we moving.
This is all there is to it. Or it could
be like this. If you married and your husband makes
good enough money, don't buy I'm gonna say look this here,

(01:25:25):
do not buy a house unless you're certain that your
kids don't want to live there. When I tell you
this journey, being by myself was the best thing that
could have because I learned that there's a scripture. Let
me see if I can fund it. There's a scripture

(01:25:47):
that I have ready yesterday, and let me see if
I can fund it. I'm trying to see if I
can fund it. What it said? Hold on? Did I
don't know it? Dude? Do I know I downloaded it yesterday?

(01:26:17):
Hold on, here it is. I'm'a share my screen so
y'all can see this scripture. I'm'a let y'all hear it.
But those of y'all my computer i'm'a let you see it.

(01:26:38):
This is what it says, I am now trying to
win the approval of human beings or God? Or am
I trying to please people? If I was still trying
to please people, I would not be a servant of God.
Well Christ the Latin one ten. Why is that important?

(01:27:03):
Because our whole entire lives we have been told that
we have to get approval from other people. And in
the scripture it contradicts that am I now trying to
win the approval of human beings or of God? So
when you think about it from a killing perspective and

(01:27:25):
a recovery perspective, this is where I get people at.
Right here, this is the thing I'm trying to get
you at, because as I go through these situations with you,
I teach you that you need to decide whether you're
gonna try to win the approval of humanity, in other words,
society standards, or are you gonna live your life of

(01:27:47):
God's standards? Because God's standing's gonna be a whole lot harder.
And yes, you are gonna be alone. Why because everybody's
not gonna be able to understand your journey. See, here's
the thing your journey and your past has nothing to
do with whether you work or not, or whether or
not you got a job or not. You can't. God
put you on this earth for a reason, and everything

(01:28:07):
you do should be based upon the approval of God
and God's standards. I don't care what human being come
to you trying to get you the love, like appreciate, value, wanted,
needed to be a part of something, be validated, to
be approved of, to be accepted, for somebody to know
your worth and proving something to people being Captain saber Ho,

(01:28:29):
building bears, build dolls, seat fillers, and Captain saber Ho.
This is the reason why people are where they're at
right now, this right here, because you're trying to get
the approval of human beings versus God. Ninety nine point
nine nine nine percent of the stuff you did you

(01:28:51):
shouldn't have been doing. That's why all of this, you
lowering yourself to build somebody up, all of this, you
doing all this stuff, taking your blessings and giving them
to somebody else. The fact that you're sitting up here,
going to prison and going to jail for somebody else
because of their problems. It ain't got nothing to do
with you. If people really love you, they don't bring

(01:29:12):
you involved in their problems. That's why before you bring
somebody into your world, you better find out what their
character is. Because if God is not leading their life,
why are you marrying these people? Why you even dealing
with these people? If they're not godly? Like you see?

(01:29:33):
Negative people want you to lower yourself. They want the
approval of human beings. Godly people are never gonna let
you lower yourself. Why would I want you to lawyer yourself.
I would never ask you to lawyer yourself, and I
certainly will not bring you involved in my problems? What
would I do that for? I stand alone, and that's

(01:29:56):
why God tooled me and he chose me to go
after that sets cup. Why God, I stood alone? I
didn't bring nobody in my problems. Those people did so.
And it comes down to being a life coach and
when it comes to healing and recovering. This scripture is
what I'm getting ready to post because this is what

(01:30:16):
my life coaching is about. You need to decide whether
you want approval and acceptance and love and all the
things I said from God or do you want it
from human beings? Because you know what's funny. God is
my husband, God is my best friend. God is my
Lord's Lord's shame, my Lord's savior. God is everything. But

(01:30:40):
I know that God and Jesus are two different entities.
So Jesus leads me through God's guidance. So as a
godly woman, that's how I lived my life. It's been
a lot of times that I've had to deal with temptation,
but now my answer is no, because if it goes

(01:31:03):
against God, the answers no, I'm not doing it. I'm
just not. Do you like me being celibate? I take
that seriously because why would I give a man my
body that's being with multiple women. So, in other words,
you don't have standards if you want to win the
approval of human beings. But you do have standards when

(01:31:27):
you want the approval of God, and you gonna stand
on business. So when you get done recovery, you gonna
stand on business. And so now when somebody says you know,
you know you're not having sex, Nope, I'm not having
sex to a marriage. I'm not having sex to there
is a ring on my finger. And if you can't
go through the journey of being celibate, yourself and cleansing

(01:31:51):
yourself of all of these women before me, because this
is something that women don't never do. They never make
a man cleanse him self of all the women he's
been with, in other words, get baptized, do a spiritual bath. Y'all,
don't never make these men cleanse themselves of the women

(01:32:12):
before you. But guess what they're inciminating in you, all
the women before you. You're taking on soul tithes that
you don't need to take on. You're taking on things
that you shouldn't even take on in the first place.
So I mean, I'm just saying, y'all deserve better. So

(01:32:36):
you should never have sex with somebody's having sex with
multiple women. You shouldn't even be dealing with somebody that
could even disrespect you in that way. Don't stay in
a relationship with a man or woman's committing in fidelity.
Leave the harless and the sucumist alone as the sirens
and the what was this harlesd sucking Jezebels, never leave

(01:32:58):
them alone, leaving with it. So I'm not saying any
of this to be mean. It's like saying you get
an allergy to something and you continue to keep eating
my homegirl's sister. I love her dearly, I do, but
she knows she ain't supposed to be shell fishing. Sheating
or And I tell her, girl, you gonna mess around,

(01:33:19):
and you gonna lead this earth because you up eating seafood,
she said, And if I'm gonna die'na die hap it.
But still I every time she ain't seafood, I used
to be scared. I'm like, lord, I had to make
sure I have been a drill in my purse cause
I used to be afraid. It's before I could eat
seafood and shellfil no more. I used to be afraid.

(01:33:42):
And she would go into electric I mean, and and
and shot because of the seafood. But luckily she always
had benearar. But it was just one time she didn't
have it. Thank god I had it. So I mean,
I'm just saying, it's just like that stuff that you
ain't supposed to be messing with, You messing with anyone
you ain't supposed to. It ain't for you. See what

(01:34:02):
I learned in this journey and recovery. If it ain't,
if it ain't got nothing to do with me, I
ain't getting involved. I just ain't because it's not my problem. Now,
if somebody's stuck somewhere and they need help, I don't
mind helping. Not a problem. But at the end of
the day, if it's something negative, that's gonna put me
in jail, and I gotta be judged on on judgment

(01:34:25):
data answers No, mm hmm, I ain't doing sorry, So No,
if somebody really care about you and they love you,
they're not gonna they're not gonna get you involved in
anything they got anything to do with them negative, they're
gonna they're not gonnaven let you get involved because they
care about you enough not to do so. So this,
this scripture is very important because that's the question in recovery,

(01:34:51):
you need to ask yourself. Are you after this journey,
after you learn from everything from your past, are you
ready to live your life and everything you do is
based upon God, are based upon human beings. If you're
basing on human beings, you going backwards. You go on
right back the way you started versus doing it when

(01:35:16):
it comes to doing what's right when it comes to God.
And that is how you truly recover, because when you
live your life godly, you gonna see Number one how
much healthier you are. You're gonna see how happier that

(01:35:37):
you are. And even though you alone at first, God
gonna bring in your community because God says to serve him.
So when you figure out what your purpose and and
God tell you look, I want you to get on
the camera and come as you are. I don't care
what you look like. I want you to come as
you are. I don't need you to come on with
bells and whistles. I need you to come on with

(01:35:58):
your bonnet. I need you to come on with your
with your hair. I need you to come on as
you are and speak because it isn't about what I
look like. It ain't about me being at my best.
It's about me being transparent and being the real version
of myself. And a lot of people can't do that.
They can't get on these cameras and be be themselves
and show themselves flaws and all with their hair issues

(01:36:19):
or whatever else they got going on, because you're covering
up your true self by being My friend is calling me,
so I'm about to talk to him for a little bit,
but I just wanna end this busson in this here
before I go. Being who you truly are

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}The Real Reason Why Black Women Single Compared To Other Races Of Women.

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Dateline NBC

On Purpose with Jay Shetty

All Episodes

The Real Reason Why Black Women Single Compared To Other Races Of Women.

Stuff You Should Know